MONEY DIARIES: Choosing to be childless & breaking stereotypes.

Hello.

My name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud Order Order

Let's get into it.

She's on the Money, She's on the Money.

Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money podcasts and millennials who want financial freedom. Welcome back to another one of our money diaries where I get the absolute privilege of talking to one of our beautiful She's on the Money community members all about their money story. Now, let's jump straight into it, because this week I got a message and it sounded exactly like this, Dear She's on the Money team. My mum was the breadwinner. This made me want to be as strong and independent as her.

Oh me too, Me too. I'm glad to be here.

How good, Oh my gosh. I cannot wait to dive into it, but in the perviviest way possible. Before we get there, can you give me an idea of what you think your money habits are If I asked you to give them a grade from A through to F I.

Think at this point in time, i'd probably give myself a B minus.

All right, well, let's learn a little bit more about that money, Daris. Let's dive straight in. Can you tell me a bit more about your money story.

Yeah, for sure. So, as I said in my intro, Mum was the breadwinner, so she always had the full time job, never anything too big and fancy or I guess, but Dad just did odd jobs and it was a bit of a laborer, so he kind of had spells where he wasn't working. So we were comfortable, but we

Yep. Great, I feel like I can resonate with that part of it.

Yeah, that started really really early, to be honest. So obviously I like to spend money when I was younger, and that didn't stop as I was getting older. And then as I started, you know, finishing high school, working started working full time, and as I started building in my career, I just obviously started earning more and more and more and more, and I absolutely got stuck with lifestyle creep that one hundred percent. I'll put my hand up for that one.

It's so easy, though, you just like slip into it. And I feel like if I explain that concept to people who haven't really spoken about their money story before, they're like, yeah, okay, whatever, Like inflation, things get more expensive over time, and I'm like, oh no, it's not just inflation getting us, it's us getting us.

Yeah. Absolutely, And so I was one of those people that quite a few years ago, I did get stuck in a bit of bad debt, and I had credit cards and whatnot because it was kind of so open and available. But I did learn that that was terrible and I've got a bit of anxiety with not having any money and whatnot. So I got myself out of that, so that was fine, And to be honest, it wasn't until I found the podcast that I really realized, God, I'm not doing a good job here and I really

I love that, So tell me a bit more about this changing my lifestyle a little bit. Because you dropped in your letter in you currently own six figures and you're on your way to owning a multimillion dollar business, Like, where is that coming? Into your money story because we need to know.

Yeah, so obviously I have a very good job. I adore my job, I love what I do, and I have been very fortunate to work with some great people and get myself into a spot where I have the ability to purchase into a business. And that's where that

I love that. So tell me a bit more about this business. How do you get yourself in a position where you're earning great money and you also have been given that opportunity, because that's not an opportunity we all get, like so many of us get really good jobs and it's never on the table to buy into a business, Like how does that eventuate?

Yeah, So, in the industry that I'm in, it basically is people own their own small business within a business. Basically is kind of the easiest way to work it out.

Is it a bit like a franchise without being a franchise. So there's like one main owner and then you get to own like a subsidiary.

Maybe No, So it's more like you own your business and you're under an umbrella of and kels. So I guess I'm trying to think of if there's something similar like probably like let's say a mortgage broke it. They might work for a certain company, but they actually own their client base.

Yes, okay, So this is where you might be like self employed but work for someone.

Yeah.

Correct, And is the benefit to you, like in that circumstance, is the benefit to you that you get like the brand and the exposure and you don't have to think about that stuff. But you get to then and the hell you know, and the admin help. Yeah, and then you get to kind of like own your clients and own your quote business.

That's it.

That's kind of cool, isn't it. Yeah?

Yeah, so's it's pretty full on when you look at it, to be honest, But it doesn't come up very easily and often for people, I'd say, you know, because it basically comes around when people look to retire.

Yeah, okay, And that's.

Kind of where it's come up for me. I worked with an absolutely wonderful person who has recently retired, and his basically plan for me is that, like, I just look after the business at the moment and eventually I'll buy it.

Okay, cool. I love that. So let's segue into the next question. I need to know the pervy details. What do you do exactly for work? And how much money do you currently earn?

Yeah, so I'm an insurance broker.

That's why you knew about mortgage broking. I was like, what is she talking about? Like and then you went into mortgage broking. I'm like, that makes a lot of sense to me because I own a mortgage breaking business. But how does she know?

Okay? I was like, how do I say it without giving it away too quickly?

I love that, Thank you for trying to keep the illusion going.

And I earn just over one hundred and fifty thousand okay, nice, and plus I get an annual bonus.

Okay, So tell me how that one fifty is made up of. Is that like commissions and a base or is that like just a set amount? And like, tell me about this bonus. I need to know all of the deeds.

Yeah. So basically that is just a pure salary. That's just my salary. I don't get any commissions or or anything like that at this stage. I'm purely just an employee.

I would be an employee for one hundred and fifty thousand dollars, so yeah, yeah, sure, good deal.

And the bonus is basically my boss. Now she gives me ten percent of our growth.

Oh okay, that's exciting. Does that really motivate you to keep bringing on new clients and grow the business?

Absolutely? And to be honest, that's the reason why we've done it this way for them, it was the best idea to one keep me on, keep me motivated, and make me want to, you know, bring more people in. Basically, Oh, I love this.

That is actually such a motivating way to kind of like build it without I feel like in this industry sometimes it can be seen as bad to get commissions, and I mean that's definitely a stereotype that doesn't exist anymore. A lot of people think it's bad, but at the end of the day, it's now set fee across the industry and there's no real additional commissions like they used to be. I mean, it used to be the wild,

Yeah, well, I am hoping to buy a house soon hopefully. And then the other big money goal is I need to put money away because buying into a business is quite a large expense and there will be a very large loan attached to that.

Yeah. I was going to say, are you going to save up for that? Or are you going to get a business loan?

Like?

Have you looked into what servicing for that might look like?

Yeah? Luckily, we've actually had quite a few people around us do similar, So I've got quite a few people to bounce things off of and chat two and get their opinions on how it will and all that type of stuff. It'll be like a small chunk here and there to start with, and.

That's the nicest way to do it. You don't have to go whole hog and like get the biggest loan. Ever. How good, that's so exciting. All right, let's go to a really quick break on the flip side. I want to talk to you about your best and worst money habits. I'm super pervy on those because I know that you've changed them since joining the She's on the money community.

Yeah? I do a little bit. So I have just a small amount in some ETFs, so that's obviously from listening to you, and I'll just decided to jump in there a little bit. But I did put that on hold from putting more in just so I could save money for the house and do all of that type of thing. Yeah, and then I've got my super which is at about one hundred and twenty five thousand.

How exciting. Tell me a bit more about this investing journey when you started, How did you pick a platform? How did you pick the ETFs that you wanted to invest in?

I did look at you know, spaceship and things like that, but I decided to just use the comm sec.

YEP, perfect app feel safe right.

Yeah, And it was quite easy and there wasn't a million choices and things to look at. It was kind of a.

Concept pocket yeah yeah, yeah, so like the one that you got a little bit of a condensed list of ets Yeah, okay, I love that for someone who has analysis paralysis.

M hmmm. So it was good to just like kind of have a read and understand a little bit as to what they were offering and what that actually looked like, to just like, you know, put my toes in the water and see how it went. Yeah.

No, I love that. That's exactly how I feel like most people start investing. And I've heard really good things about Contact Pocket because it does have that condensed list. You're like, okay, now I'm not looking at hundreds of them, I like have ten, let's go from there. So that's super exciting. Debt do you currently have any and if not, can you tell me a bit more about your debt story when you got yourself into a little bit of a lifestyle creep conundrum.

Of course, Yes, I do have a car loan. Actually was listening to one of the earlier episodes and someone was talking about having a car loan with a balloon yeah, and that really resonated with me because that seems terrifying, you know, getting to the end of a loan cycle and then having to pay a lump sum. But I actually got my car on a balloon payment scheme. But I spoke with the financial guy at the car yard and I'm actually just paying extra to get it.

Paid off quicker and like not have to have Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. And basically they had like a deal going on and the rate was so much cheaper if you took the balloon option.

Yeah. Isn't it crazy how much they kind of incentivize you to stay in debt.

Yeah exactly. But he was so good and he just said, if you pay this much per fortnite, whatever it is, you'll have it paid off before that date. And you'd be all good and you won't have anything to pay. So that was I thought, fantastic advice.

Yeah, like we're all going to go with a lower interest rate?

Yes, please exactly. Yeah. Yeah.

Does that make you feel I mean we're in the middle of cost of living crisis? Does that also make you feel a little bit more secure knowing that if things hit the fan, you could lower how much you're paying on your car and still be okay? Or is that something that you haven't really thought of?

Yeah, I guess it does. While I'm in the last like little leg of you know, saving money for a house, it is actually quite good because I have dropped that payment slightly just to add those extra couple of dollars into the savings account.

Yeah, it's given you a bit more flexibility.

Because I look at the you know, what's O and blah blah blah, work out the calculation, and I'm already way ahead than what I actually need to be. So yes, it is. It's a nice piece of mind for sure.

And how much is your car loan right now? And what did you take out?

So it was forty eight thousand and I've got twenty five thousand left on it. Yeah, so I think it should be paid off in about eighteen months.

How cool? Can I ask what type of car does a forty eight thousand dollar loan get you?

Well? I did also have a trade in.

Oh, you're about to tell me a bougie option which she's a fancy girl.

I actually yeah, I drive, are you?

Yeah?

Cool?

You don't take me as a yute gurlie.

But I love this well, to be honest, it all fits in with my work, so I do a lot of long driving and country and stuff like. That's so fair.

Okay, So the type of insurance broking you're in is not like life insurance for people in the CBD. No, it's more maybe like agricultural and farming. Is that right?

Yeah, I have a lot of that. I also specialize in hard to place Ah cool, yeah, so big like manufacturing, you know, basically anything that can hurt people or yeah yeah yeah and in a bad way.

Oh that would be so interesting to do. Do you love it in addition to it being a really good career?

Oh?

Yeah, I mean I say to people it's stressful quite a lot. Yea, it will be, but I absolutely love it. I don't know what it is and whether I'm just a weird person that likes things like that.

But ye, no you're not. I get it. I get it all right, Tell me a bit more. You've obviously changed your money habits more recently. What's your best money habit.

My best money habit would probably have to be that if I decide on something, I am pretty good at getting it done. So if I sat down one day and said I need to change, I need to stop spending and save a bit more, I will do it. Like if I put a goal, then I'll cut corners and do what I need to do to make sure I get there. So that's probably my best one.

That's actually a fantastic habit. Like doing what I said I was going to do is something I am not that great at. I'm always like, oh, I'll be better at X, or I'll be better at Y at some point in the future, and then I don't do it. Like if that was my money habit, I'd be so proud of myself.

Yeah, well, I mean, once I get to the end, I am, and to be honest, I'm not perfect, so.

I do sometimes no one is come on.

Starter on these things, but it definitely is something that I am. I'm glad that I can do if I need to.

I love that. Can we flip the narrative? What are you not so good at? What's your worst money habit?

I'm just a spendy gal ah girl.

Same what do we spendy on?

Though I'm an absolute yes man. I will say yes to absolutely anything, so if that's a dinner, a night out, an activity, I'm one of those people like I recharge with others. So I'm always out about doing things. And you know, even if you just go out for breakfast, it's an expensive thing these days to go out for breakfast.

Why is it so expensive? My husband and I went out on the weekend and he had like this fancy eggs benedict thing that looked really good. I'm so basic. I always get two poached eggs on toast, like I can't be changed. Two coffees. It was like sixty dollars. Be for real, be for real, Like, do you remember back in the day it used to be like fifteen dollars for breakfast and maybe a coffee will push it close to twenty, but.

It wasn't exactly. And that's you add that and then you kind of go all right, Well, I'm also going out for dinner that night, or you know, going out with the girls for drinks or whatever it might be. That's usually my kryptonite. I don't don't like to say no.

It adds up, hey, Like I just I can't get over it. And like I'm very privileged in that I'm still able to afford to do that, Like we put it into our budget and we make it happen, and that's something that we really value. But it's so tough at the moment because I look at that and I go historically for me, I don't know about you, dinner and breakfast, like they used to be two different price points.

Yeah, And I think that probably leads on to my second worst habit is that I don't know where all my money goes. So I have like it's set up that I know that you know, when I get paid, all my money goes to my bills and this and this and this, and they all sit in their own accounts. But then I just have, you know, my spending money, and then I look at that and it just and I don't know where it goes in the end.

Why do you think that is?

I I've just never been a person to keep track of it. I've not ever been that person that hasn't been able to pay something or have got to that point where I've had an issue forced into it. And that's probably what's come from having this higher income, is that I kind of sit there and I probably give myself too much money to play with and I don't need to see where it's all going or see what's

Yeah, And I feel like the second you get the house, the spending just increases. And even if you have a fully furnished house right now, like you will always find things that you need to purchase in this new house above and beyond all of the actual property costs. You're like, oh my gosh, well, actually there's a spare corner here. I need a side table. You might be buying it on Marketplace, but that's still money going out the door. Like it is wild how that compounds. I'm going to

Absolutely, we will love numbers.

So we will set you up with that. But what I'm hearing right now is that you're pretty money savvy, and I mean you're clearly being offered an epic opportunity, like the fact that you'll be able to own a million dollar business and potentially retire in your fifties, like that is elite. One thing we didn't get onto that you mentioned in your money story, because you know, like we're here to talk about money, but this is more

To be honest, it's probably been a decision that I made a long, long time ago, you know, it's it's not been in the last a few years or whatever that might be. And I've been pretty steadfast in it. You know, when you just know something it's.

Not for you, it's not for me.

Yeah, yeah, And you know, don't get me wrong, Like, I love my niece and I've got you know, there's lots of people around me with babies and I love them, but it's just not my future. I just don't see it.

I love that for you, like I just love that you've made the decision and it works for you. Although as this isn't on you, I just think it's really frustrating when I'm having a conversation like this, and when anyone's having a conversation like this, you're probably going to agree with me here, and you know, you say, oh, I just don't want to have kids. Often we feel the need to then justify it and go, oh, but I do love my nieces, and I do love my nephews,

No, And I mean, this will, this will probably you know, hit you a little bit. But for me, I did make the conscious decision to tell my employer that I wasn't going to be doing that, and in all honesty, I think that is one of the main reasons why I was able to get where I am.

Oh my god, that's so pervy and that pisces me off.

Yeah, because there wasn't that you know, weird thought process that oh, she'll just go off and have kids at some stage, so you know, we better not put too much, you know, on them and blah blah blah blah blah, whereas.

You've just been really clear with them. Like, by the way, this isn't for me.

Because I feel like I shouldn't have to. But at the same time, I feel like if I didn't, then I could have looked a bit different, if that makes sense.

Isn't it sad that that's the case, Like, I'm so glad that you've used that to your own advantage, and I think that women should be using every opportunity like this to their advantage. Like, yeah, it sucks. No, I don't want to be in this position and be put behind because of that choice. But also we use what we've got to use and make it work for us, right,

But I guess that's probably you know, as I mentioned in my story, you know, it is a very male dominated industry because the way we service our clients. Having that, you know, say, nine to twelve months off after you've had a baby, is extremely hard to handle from our kind of position, if that makes sense.

No, I get it as someone in finance, the way people side eye me because I have had a baby, and even the way people have side eyed me because I say, oh, yeah, no, no, no, I dropped Harvey off to daycare so it could come into recording. They're like, Victoria is five months old, and I'm like, yep, because like I have a career and a life, and like this is what I've chosen. And just because I'm parenting

Like be for real, Yeah it is. It's frustrating when you do you have to kind of defend it in some way. Yet if I didn't have a career or something. Someone would be judging me for that, Like you know, it's just never ending cycle.

Not everything is for everybody. You don't want a career, Slay, I'm glad you know that you don't want a career. You don't want to work, and you want to be a stay at home mum. Like I hope that that is the most fulfilling job you ever have, because that's all you've ever wanted. Like, I don't care what you do, as long as you have the tools and the resources to make educated decisions about your life and it is a choice, not something you're forced into. I could not care less.

Yeah, absolutely be for real.

Anyway, I'm glad that I asked you about that because I feel like there are a lot of people who would be going or how she do that? Like what are the negative comments that people are making? Because you mentioned here that there are like positive and negative, and I feel like a lot of the positive are going to be like, oh, you can focus on your career, and oh my gosh, I'm glad you're doing the right thing for you and get it. But like, are people really that brazen that they're so negative?

Still? Yeah, people can be and I guess that was the reason why I wanted to put it in the story, was because there are probably a lot of people out there who do feel this way, and to be honest to my mom a long time to understand that that was kind of where I was going. But I'm like, I've got siblings, I've got cousins. It's fine, babies around and be right. But the negative comments that come out of it always the same.

You'll change your mind, Why would I change my mind?

Always the same, And I'm like, okay, cool, maybe I do. But it's always said with that malice of you know, with that kind of thought process, like you're just being selfish. You know you're not bring it out of this world, so you're being selfish or you know this isn't what you're meant to do, or how could you do that? Is? It is really odd how.

Pressed someone else gets about your personal situation.

And unfortunately it's always usually comes from women.

Yes, I've noticed that. I find it wild when people think that the decision to not have kids is selfish, when it's probably one of the most selfless things you can do, Like I've put me first. We are already in a world that is arguably overpopulated. Who knows where the world is going. It was a conundrum that I had when my husband and I were choosing to have kids. I was like, is this a world that we want to bring a child into? Like is this what we

No, not with all, not with all the h oh really you know you get from people. It's actually it gets a bit tiring at that time. So usually I just don't say anything. I just say no, I don't have kids.

You just look back at them and be like, oh, and you chose to have kids with those genetics, like be for real, all right? I want to know. Now we've had a really good chat, and I feel like you are one of these people that just knows themselves and I love that, Like you know where you're going, you know what you want out of life, Like you graded yourself a BS, but you have a really good grasp on what your money story was, and you're earning

To be honest, probably just being more aware of where my money goes and what I'm actually spending on to see if it's just you know, things that I can change, you know, whether I you know, don't get a coffee every day and I just I can make them at home. I don't need I don't need a morning coffee every day. Things like that. But to be honest, I think I really need to probably speak to like a financial advisor or something like that just for the future planning.

Yeah, I've got one for you. I will set you up off air. I feel like that's a really good idea, especially because you have such clarity in your career and what you're doing, and like, let's be honest, the biggest financial burden these kids. You already know you're not going to have that. Okay, well, how are we making ourselves wealthy?

Yeah? And that's and that's it, because I do look at it and I say, you know, I do have quite a high income. I should be doing more with it, if that makes sense, or whether that's investing, whether that's putting it in my super or whatnot. I've obviously had the savings for a house being the main priority, but once that's done, I really need to probably branch out and think about it a bit more.

I love that. All right, Well, it doesn't seem like you're that far off an A plus money Dorris. I have loved this conversation. I feel like it's been an empowering chat. I hope that everyone listening is kind of like, yeah, I love this for you, and they kind of see that choice to not have children slightly differently, and maybe if everyone in the Shees on the money community goes, you know what, we're gonna actively never have a thing to say about anybody who chooses not to have children,

Yeah. Absolutely, and that's the the hardest part. But do we need to stop having that when you're having kids conversation because it is it can be really triggering.

Get in the bin, all right, well money, Doris, Thank you so much. It has been an absolute pleasure, and I know that our community is going to eat this one up, so I really appreciate your willingness to share.

Thank you so much. Appreciate it.

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