Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr
the Order Kerney Whoalbury and a waddery woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on a wondery country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through as this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow.
Let's get into it. She's on the Money.
She's on the Money.
Hello and welcome to She's the Money the podcast and millennials who want financial freedom. My friends, today it is Friday, which guess what that means, in no surprise to anybody, is time to get my little team together and celebrate you ow incredible. She's on the Money community today. Miss Jess Ricci, she's back. She's sharing her money wins and confessions from the community. Miss beck Sayed has a number
of very exciting broke tips for us. We're going to be helping to answer a juicy money dilemma which this week is all about getting out of a rut and still prioritizing future you, and we're gonna unpack something that you slid into our DMS, about which this week we're adding spending money on yourself from a joint account that you have in your partner. Before we get there, though, my friends, how are you good?
It's sunny today. Nice difference for those of us in Melbourne who've been dealing with the rain and the I was gonna say the hail and the snow, but we haven't had hail or snow, so just the rain. There were you not clearly not your Yeah. I love that the sun is out, feeling good, feeling happy New Year. You me still basking in the glow of that, currently trying to sow my Taylor Swift errors outfit for anyone who follows me on social media and is keeping up.
I don't know how to sew.
I didn't pick you as a habitashist, a haberdashist.
I'm not one.
I've literally never even heard that term.
Your habitashists radar is bag on.
That's good to know. That's good to know.
I'll walk out on the streets of confidence. That's good to know that sounds lovely and just as your bad luck street come to an end, I don't I don't.
Want to trigger you. Don't you get Taylor Swift like Diamonte cowboy boots in.
The very exciting, very cute. No, there's currently a hole in my roof still leaks when it rains, arguably more so than ever before.
But we are going to get very close to this real estate agency because it is wild what they're putting you through there.
It's more of a company that built out like it's a brand new house.
I'm sorry you called their emergency line and they were like, sorry, they're busy.
Today has always been better than mine.
I don't want to rob it in, but I certainly has, and I also don't want to drink that. At the same time, my voice is back, as you guys can tell.
Yeah, I feel like we're all back after the holiday, and they're like, listen to us, we sound young again.
Yes, we like.
It's gonna wear for really quickly. I feel like at the start of the year everyone's really happy, really light, really bouncy. Maybe by July we'll be bit angry again.
Well that's a good run if I make it to July. I'll be thrilled.
Honestly, that's a great run.
I mean for you.
I couldn't even be several hours if it hasn't happened already.
But no, moment's been.
Really good, just being like seeing friends and being on the potinsular. Yeah, it's really nice. It's lovely. Day has just said, just good fights all round, feeling great.
I love I love this so much. I'm getting increasingly unco comfortable. I do now look like I am smuggling a beach ball. But that is okay, very grateful, very healthy, very happy. Yeah, I'm excited for Taylor Swift as well, Like Jess and I are going together with two other girls from our team, which is obviously going to be the best ever.
You're wearing a friendship bracelet? Is that related or unrelated?
It is related because fifty bracelet not going to this When is this concert that's on the seventeenth of January February. Yeah, I'm going to be thirty nine weeks pregnant. I will regret nothing.
That is going to be very hard. But no, someone is going and she made me a bracelet for the well it there's a bit of vackstory it's tweetledumb because she's tweetled d Well, there wasn't really that much of a Vacktorid's that.
That's actually just the story. And I think you're says fearless, doesn't it? I need to make myself one so that it can like sit on my thank you. I actually will commission that I need to.
I got any email just before my package is arrived with all my beads.
Is this something that I'm going to be expected to do?
I'll do it for you?
Like, do I need to get a whole heap of bracelets to trade because everybody else is going to have bracelets to trade?
You've got enough on your plate?
Can I just buy bracelets? Is that an option?
Don't worry about it. We'll talk later.
I got your covered, Okay, okay, okay. I haven't even thought about my outfit because I can't stop thinking about the idea that you know, Jess has these beautiful outfits in mind, right, She's got all of these beautiful options, and then she's like posting videos of like beautiful chul and stuff, and I'm like, this is going to look slay if you put me in sparkles and diamonds. I'm going to look like a disco ball.
I think we go all in and you just wear a crop top and we paint a disco ball on your belly.
Absolutely not a great I already feel somewhat uncomfortable whenever my belly is out. Over summer, I like wore a bikini and it took point two seconds for me to go find a linen shirt and be.
Like, look, I want you to wear a pencil skirt and the belly will be the top of a microphone.
Oh my god, that's so good?
Is that?
Like?
Can you do can you do that?
Just for me?
Just for you, just for you?
All right, moving on, because I don't want any more Habitdasherie recommendation. Let's get into what has been happening in the community. It's just gricci. What community money wins? All confessions have you got to share this week?
Firstly, I've got a win from Ashley who said I finally found a way to make iced coffee at home that tastes better than my morning mac is iced coffee, saving myself a cheeky seventy dollars a week by not buying them went out and about.
Could she send the recipe.
Yeah, that's actually the question, Ashley, please share the recipe with us. Actually I think she did because I can see at least asked the same thing. So go to the thread great recipes there. Next, I've got a money win from Lucy, who said money win. Good name, but it is a good name spelled with an I, not with a wife. Oh way cuter, wait, very cute, I.
Pictured l I see why.
I see where.
It's.
It's like how when I met my husband and his name is Stephen and he said, yeah, it's a Stephen with a pea and I immediately thought of that Small Mexicular Dog album. And now he's saved in my phone as PHT E V E N and the small Mexican Dog is his profile picture.
Very huge, Hilariously, that's how he saved in my phone too, because you air dropped the contact to me like everybody.
Their phoney.
But Lucy said money win. I bought a Raffle ticket with money I earned from the collect the Container Deposit scheme. I won said Raffle, which included a fifty dollars pharmacy voucher. I went to the pharmacy to buy a discounted Breast pub. It was the last month they had in stock, so they discounted it a further fifty dollars.
Okay, but they're really expensive and I didn't know that.
So she only paid fifty bucks, which was covered by her container refund, so she saved you nine dollars together.
No gosh, there you go.
Recycle your bottles, Runds.
That's incredible.
Never know when you could win a voucher next. I've got one from Nicole who said double money win. Someone posted in my local Facebook group looking for any one with an overgrown yard who wouldn't mind having some sheep over for a week to eat it down.
Me, she said me, totally.
Me.
I get my lawn mode and fertilized and they didn't have to pay to feed the sheep for ten days. Meet Paris, Chocolate and Honey, my new lawn maintenance crew, and of course we have a picture.
Most thing I've seen in my life.
That's really clever. If they happen to want to do a front nature strip, I know someone with one.
That's very overgrown. I actually follow. I don't know who it is. I will post it on my stories. I follow a group of goats. One who do like garden demolition, and I got that's so funny, and they like sence the goats into places that have like really like dense like shrubbery and stuff that people are meant to pull out.
That goats eat everything. So they do these time lapses of these goats going in and doing their work and like eating everything and then going away being like, we're the goats, we did our work.
I actually love everything about that.
I'm gonna say so funny.
I'm that is amazing. Next, Christine said she picked up a gorgeous stainless steel pan from the op shop for ten bucks when it's worth one hundred. Love a good opshop. Fine, good time to be op shopping at a moment?
Is it well played?
Didn't even catch that everyone's getting rid of their stuff for the new.
Year, so you shop time right now is great.
Rhiannon said, money Win. I found a broken bit of plant on the footpath, put it in water to grow roots, and after a few weeks I got a new plant baby.
For free, money Win. Beautiful photo, oh lovely.
Of the plant baby. I want to know, did you find it on the footpath or did.
You liberate it? Find it on the foot path, like the time I stole a string of pearls from my sister's string of pearls plants and planted that myself and now mine looks better than her.
Oh, that would kill you.
Well, maybe she should have looked after it in the first place.
Lastly, I have a money win from Catherine which comes with a little bit of a PSA. She said, free money. I signed up to Chairs's with the ten dollar SotM code, which I've then reinvested the dividends that I earned. I feel so rich when I look at it, despite having no spare dollars to invest right now. Thanks SotM, you'm welcome.
So you're saying that your free money is making more free money, and that free money will make you more money, huge money.
We light hack and it was I said PSA because a few people dm us to say the code wasn't working.
Cool.
We've been canceled by Chasey.
Oh I reached out. Thankfully, they've given us the code back for another year. So SotM will give you a free ten bucks when you sign.
Up, so we don't get anything for that. Just to be very clear, that is not a referral code. That's just free money for you and dividends as well. So now Catherine's on the app and up, I love it. What else have you got, Jess? That's it? That's it. I mean, that's ending on a like free money giving free money. That was a good place to end. People who love free money also love broke tips. So Beck say it, what have you for us?
Okay? So this week I have, as always, two from the community, one for myself. So the first one comes from Prianca. She suggested it's something I have done. Dye your old clothes instead of buying new ones, like referb which is a great idea because often, like for example, I'll buy white shirts that look amazing for like one and a half hours, and then I always yes, And I actually recently died one of them pink and the stains are kind of gone, like maybe they're still kind of there, but you see.
Them with a pinkover and everyone's like, oh my gosh, I buy a new shirt.
I'm like, yeah, thank you so much, and it didn't barely cost me anything.
But you can also tell people that you're a habitasherist and you made it exactly exactly.
So yeah, killing like multiple birds with one stone out in twenty twenty four. We're not killing animals anyway.
So the next one comes from me on the vegan trip because I have seen her eat steak.
That's true, very early controversial waters.
Please steer away.
Let's steer away.
I'm very scared right now.
She's on spicy.
So this next one comes from Reliar, who shared a page on Instagram that post cheap hacks, and one in particular that I liked is about this article that gave you suggestions on really cheap recipes. Some of them were like eight dollars, some of them were cheap, some of them are tiny bit more expensive. So this Instagram page is at four zero one Okayay, so four hundred and one okay, I don't really know what that stands for.
We're not going to question it because they have cheap recipes back.
Exactly, let's not question it. But they also have other little cheap hacks, but just have a little peruse go on their Instagram. Yeah, have a look. But yes, that cheap recipe article I will be following to the tea because that is you.
Know, I think it's my like chea food.
We absolutely need food to survive, and so you know, if that's all you can afford before payday, at least do it cheaply as possible.
But also, even if you can afford it, what a good way to save some money. So find some cheap eats like slash your grocery bill. Yeah, that is absolutely what you should be doing in twenty twenty four. But importantly, you're not going to get away with pretending that you're a habitasherist. Yes, just because you died your shit pink does not get you out of giving us a broke tip from you. What is the tip that you are bringing to the table.
This I do sometimes like to merge the two, but I won't know.
I've noticed she's lazy. I won't be stingy even on her tips. So my broke tip for this week.
I'm not sure if anyone remembers, but last year I did share a tip about the Brunswick Tool Library, which is where you like kind of borrow tools and stuff you don't have to pay for them. They're very expensive. Turns out, so this is in the same vein. So some libraries have these things called maker spaces, which is where you know, if you want to get into embroidery, or sewing or things like that, and you can you know,
borrow other things like puzzles and games and stuff. But these places are dedicated to people who want to learn that kind of skill may not have the resources or the money to afford to buyos all those things themselves, Like you know, the sewing I don't know how much a sewing machine is.
I should so expensive. I looked into it for making my outfit and I decided I was going to hands because hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of dollars.
Wow. So that's why things like this are really good, and that you know, if you are wanting to monetize that skill eventually that could even make you money. But let's not get to ahead of ourselves.
But I think it is a really good way to kind of like expand your skill set and maybe learn a new skill along the way, but also like do something you want for free, like money, and also you can use that to tailor your own clothes one day. Love it.
That's such a ga.
That's genius.
That's I love it.
Thank you so much.
That's me.
All right, let's go to a really quick break on the flip side. We are talking about getting out of a rut and still prioritizing future you and you slid into our DMS about a topic this week that I am genuinely so excited to break down spending money from a shared account that you share with your partner.
I think it's going to be divisive.
I think it'll be divisive too, because it's not just on electricity, you know, So, guys, don't go anywhere.
Welcome back, everybody. Let's take a listen to the Money to Lemmons for this week.
Hi, there, have you got a money dilemma you just can't solve? The Sheese on the Money Team is here to help. Every week, we tackle your dilemmas, both big and small, to answer your most burning money, career and life questions. To get involved, simply head to our website and leave us a short voice recording and you might just find yourself on the show. Now, let's take a listen to this week's money dilemma.
Hi, love Lies, I'm really hoping you can help me make a decision. I am in a rut and I'm struggling to change that. I'm in a dead end job, I'm goalless and I'm savings less. The only thing I'm sure of is that I want to either move and make a fresh start, or travel the country for a year before settling down somewhere. My options for funding this would be to either sell my house or borrow against some equity. After paying out my loan, I would have
approximately three hundred thousand dollars in profit. Alternatively, if I keep the houses in investment and rent it out, I could use some of the one hundred and ninety thousand dollars of equity that has built up. It would be very very easy for me to sell up and run away, but I'm not sure that that would be the best for future me. What do you think would be the best move?
I think this is a really interesting one. There's a quote here we go loves a quote. I love a quote, Quote scal. I've gone from being twenty twenty three stat scout to twenty twenty four quote scale. Wait, you want a motivational quote, I've got one for you. But there is a quote that basically says, you can run, but your problems are going to follow you. And I'm not saying that you've got massive problems, but like this idea of like, oh, I don't really know what I'm doing,
but like I should sell up and move completely. I would argue, is not the solution that you're looking for. It could provide some level of clarity, It could provide a different environment for you to you know, get used to. But I genuinely think that before you do any of that, you should be really sitting down and thinking about or I say, you don't have any goals, but like, what in my life do I value? What in my life am I grateful for? What in my life do I
you know, feel like I want to change? Or like is a little bit stagnant and actually doing some planning to understand why you feel this way, because if you can't articulate, like I want to run a but I don't know why or when or where or how just like doing that and making such a big decision. If you're saying, look, I could have you know, three hundred grand in profit, Well that's great, but like, are you planning on just blowing that to have your best life ever?
Because you feel like running away like that three hundred thousand dollars today is worth three hundred grand, but when you come to retirement it could be worth millions. Like, you know, if we look at your property and you're saying, well, there's one hundred and ninety thousand dollars worth of equity, Like that's fantastic. Are we putting future us first by
actually making the decisions that you're making. Should we be looking at you know, rening it out, maybe using some of that rental income to like, you know, go on a big europe trip because you do want to get away and want to experience some new things and then coming back. I'm not saying you can't move or change, but like, those are big decisions that are going to have really big grammifications on your future financial well being. And I just go, hmm, I wouldn't be so quick
to jump into that. You ever felt like running away?
Yeah, all the time. I literally ran away from Sydney to Melbourne and it was the best decision ever.
But yeah, because you see it now, we get it, don't This is the thing and this.
Is not really it's obviously not financial advice, but this is more life advice.
None of it is.
I think this is a life advice segment.
Now probably a life advice situation. But for me, take for example, you know, I've always been in entry level jobs, literally this time. Two years ago, I was working in a warehouses, a pickpacker, and I decided I got saying no no, wait no, was.
Like five years ago. Bars down, I mean no statement, statement retracted. Then she came to work at She's on the money. I see it, fabe. I think that the side like packages. You guys said that you worked with packages match she liked ours. That's anyway. I did impact like your package. But no.
So one thing that I told myself because I was obviously like, you know, it was twenty nine thirty, that's not old by any means, but I was like, I should probably do something. I decided to really look at life. Instead of being halfway up or a little bit up a ladder, I don't want to climb. I decided to start at the bottom of a ladder. I wanted to climb, which is new ladder, which is you know, I started on reception here, and that's like just starting at the
very and you killed it of a ladder. You want to climb, and even that kind of brings you the happiness or the satisfaction you kind of want. Knowing that you're in a dead end job. This is a job that will eventually lead something that you want to do, but also move if you want to. But just keep that in mind. Start like, just climb a ladder you want to climb, even if it's at the very very very bottom of it, and trying to make that work.
That's very poetic.
You're trying from home, just gorchi. No, I think it's got a really nice house. That makes sense.
Well, there's a few holes in the roof of the bad that's true.
Yeah, right.
I think I would say that you don't have to make that big of a decision all at once, like a lot of.
A decision to make. That's why I'm like, we thought about this.
Yeah, I think I know that I'm very risk ad first, and there are certainly people out there who really push the make the change, do the big thing. Don't wait for the day, just as like instead of tea in the morning, track offe. No, but if you're craving, if you want to go somewhere, like you said, take a
short trip rather than moving. If you think that you want to change careers, maybe dabble by doing something on the side or I just I don't think you have to be all in or all out, especially if it's a decision like this one that has potentially astronomical implications on your financial future, like selling a house, selling investment propers.
And there's no guarantee you're going to be happy at the other end because you don't deeply.
Know who, because you don't have the clarity. So I think maybe before you make a decision, as you were saying, sit down, assess what you want, do a bit of internal work. You can try things before you go. I was going to say balls deep but not very unbranded.
That's okay. It goes with me saying that I hired you because I like your packages. That's true.
So you know, I think try things or find ways to expect if you want to change, make a change. Like I'm not saying keep doing the same thing, but maybe just in small ways first, so that maybe you try something you're oh, actually hate that, don't want that. Imagine if I'd gone all in on that terrible So you can you know, maybe you'll find something that you didn't think that you would want that you do to make sense.
No, I totally agree with that, and I think that's where I was like, oh, like running away from your problems doesn't actually solve your problems, and while your problems might not be like you know, these big dramatic things, they don't have to be if you deeply haven't sat down and thought about like, well, who am I? What do I value about myself? What do I value about my lifestyle? Like if you've sat down and been like, look, I really value my freedom, my flexibility. I hate cold weather,
I don't like this, I don't like that. I do love this, I do love that, And you go, I'm not running away, but I would live my best life if I moved to Bali. And you've got clarity on the fact that you know that's a good decision for you because you've written down why that makes sense.
Go for it.
I'm not going to stop you, but I do think we need to be going. Actually, let's put the brakes on this because you're like, I don't have any goals, I don't have any aspirations. I don't know what I'm doing. Like, okay, well, let's just press pause and understand who we are. You don't have to have this big laundry list of goals.
And as much as I'm a goal setting girly like adore It even released an entire online course on proper goal setting, Right, you don't have to have goals in mind to start that process and go, well, actually, what is it going to take for me to live my best life?
Like what do I like?
You know?
And Beck and I might write these lists and they're going to be so wildly different, and that's a good thing, but it gives us clarity and well, what SPEC's next step? Like she knows she wants to be in media, she knows she likes this type of lifestyle, and you know, being in this area, and you know I'm having a baby, Like these things are so different that you just really need to step back and go Actually, as much as I feel a little bit aimless, let's just have a look.
Because I can almost guarantee if I did the same to Jess and you were saying this, I'd be like, well do you like this or that? And you'd be like, oh, I don't like that, and you can start learning, Oh maybe that's not the root. This is the root. But just by jumping into one thing, it's not going to solve it. I promise it's not going to solve it. In fact, you might end up regretting it.
Come back and update us in a year on what you decide and we.
Set your goals. Go sit down and actually write down what you enjoy about life, what you want, more of, what you want, less of, what you want to keep on doing. I think it's important totally.
Can you tell us about the DM?
Yeah?
Please?
All right, I'm ready to share with you the DM that I posted publicly on our stories earlier this week.
But I've not read that.
You definitely have not read already because stay away from our socials. All right, So here's the DM. Hey, ladies, I need some advice. My partner checked our joint bank account and saw my orders from the Iconic. I probably had about five different orders totally around seven hundred and fifty dollars. He's cracked it at me and hasn't spoken to me in over a day. That's really true, because he's so angry, yelling at me and saying it's a waste of money and I shouldn't have put it on
our card. I feel like I should be able to spend my money without getting in trouble and made it feel bad, And now I'm thinking I shouldn't have a joint account with him if this is how he reacts I'm not sure if I'm in the wrong or not for putting this on our card. It didn't feel like it at the time, but he's now made me feel like it was a terrible thing to do and I've betrayed his trust. What do you think?
I feel like I'm gonna have a different opinion to both you. So I almost want to go last.
Okay, No, I want you to go first.
M okay, okay. I need a some much more context because I want to know if that joint account is strictly for bills or rent.
Oh yeah, because if you're doing that, that to me is a no no and what are you doing?
It's subjectively bad, that is not what it is for. If it's just like the for like you guys put all your your pay both your pays in, then yes, spend whatever you want on whatever you want.
Whatever you want.
Well, I just this is why I was thinking, are you saving for something? Like? Is there a joint goal in mind? And you've decided to only spend x amount on your own things? I don't know, Like I know, you know, you know, but you don't know. But when you don't know what, you don't know exactly. So Basically, what I'm going to say is this, if it is her own money and they haven't decided to try and save together X amount per week, she's spending her own
money that she made herself. Go for it. That's absolutely your prerogative, and I don't see anything wrong here. But if it's a joint account for bills and et cetera and the like, you can't buy stuff from the iconing from that account, is my thinking.
Yeah, so that's me, Jess.
You have to go, you have to go.
Now.
See this. I think this is why I will never fully ever share my finances, because I'm imagining that she and her partner just have one shared bank account, perhaps that everyone's money goes into that bank account. Everything is debeted out of that bank account. I personally think if that is the case, seven hundred fifty dollars is a
lot of money. I think that's a conversation that she'd been had because if my partner and I were in the same situation he spent seven hundred fift dollars on I don't know, a video game.
I would be lack excuse me, or what the hell?
I would be taken aback because in my mind, a significant purchase with shared funds is something that should be discussed. You know, what is significant is up for debate and personal to everybody. I actually think she should have said something. The way that I imagine that I would work around this, or the way that we currently manage our finances, and I don't think I ever would change, is that independent
money is independent. So if you are both earning fifty thousand dollars and you put X amount into an account every week and that's your shared fund that you use for joint purchases, for date nights, for a wedding or a holiday, or your bills or whatever, those are shared funds. But I think that it's really important that people are able to spend their money however they want. But I also think that maybe to make it equal or equitable, you should have that money.
Allocated to you.
I don't know, it's like each month we both get a thousand dollars to blow on whatever we want, or five hundred dollars or whatever it is. But I just think that if it's joint money and you're making it be purchase, it's something that should have been discussed. Because obviously he was taken aback I do not at all condone the way that he has approached that with you. That feels I feel like that's a different story. I feel very displeased with the way that he has treated you.
I feel very displeased. Yeah, I'm sorry. Are we living in nineteen ninety four? Like, is the silent treatment still something that you give? Where are your words?
Sir?
You are an adult.
To blow up and be angry, I think is not the appropriate way to handle it. But I think it signifies that that is not something that he thought you guys would and so you're not on the same page there, so you need to get on the same page.
I want to know how long they've had that joint account and.
What the discussion was around what it is, because my partner and I have a shared account, but it is purely like grocery funds and like bill funds.
How would you deal if James you were going through the banking saw like James had spent five hundred bucks out of your joint account.
I literally would be like what is this for?
Yeah, but you would question it first absolutely being like what the hell? That was a waste of money?
No?
Yeah, okay.
It would be like if you want to buy something, you buy it with your money, like instantly, I spend. You know, we've said before I earn my partner, I definitely have spent big dog bit. I definitely spend more discretionally than he does because I have the funds to do so. But that it's never you know, the detriment of our shared goals or of our you know, shared.
Yeah, of course, because you've already put that money into savings or the investments or whatever. Yeah.
So I think it really depends on what the conversation was around how those as you were saying, how those funds will be managed. Yes, but yeah, controversial, I think, because I think most people are going to be like, it's your money, girl, spender how you want.
I don't think it is. Sorry, I can definitely agree that if that is the I guess those are the guidelines of the account when it was set up. Like if your partner Jess went and spent money from that account and you told me, I'd be like, well, that's actually unacceptable. Where do you get that audacity from? Like what's going on? And he might turn around and be like, oh my god, Jess. When I went to pay, I
pulled out the wrong card, sorry, and the like. It all fixes itself up, but it's all good to go. But I'm assuming you both when you got that joint account, had to chat, right, and you said, we're going to get a joint account. We're going to put X amount in it together, and it's for ABC and D right. Yeah, so that's the breadth, and I guess the boundaries of that account. Now, if we look at how I manage money in my relationship, I don't have my own money
and Steve does not have his own money. Both of our incomes going to one one pool, and that's our money, and it doesn't matter if one of us earns double then the other. It's just it's our money across the board. And from that money, we pay our mortgage, we pay our bills, you know, we pay for Lucy like we
actually have debit cards to the same accounts. So if we looked at this situation and it was reversed and it said, hey, Victoria spent seven hundred and fifty dollars from our joint account, well yeah, actually, because that's my only location of where I do spending from. We don't have our own money accounts where we make I guess individual purchases. We do have our own emergency funds, but neither of us touch that amount of money. But we have like a debit card that I use that connects
to the same account and vice versa with Steve. However, I would never purchase something that is I would say, like above one hundred dollars that was a personal purchase without talking to my husband, and I'm not asking him for permission, Like I want to be really clear that, like I'll go buy a dress and I might not mention it, but both of us do that within reason. So if I've gone and spent like one hundred bucks on a new dress, I did, I'm wearing it right now.
I bought it a Country Road. It was one hundred nineteen dollars on sale, and I was really excited about it. I didn't call my husband for permission. Yeah, I was like, well, I'm going to buy myself a new dress.
That's great.
I know we've got the money. I know it's in our budget for me to buy clothes and stuff. Yeah, seven hundred and fifty dollars to meet is a very different situation, like I would be and we're not talking about permission here, but I would be very uncomfortable going and spending that amount of money without giving my husband a heads up, being like, hey, there's a whole heap of stuff on sale on the Iconic, do you reckon? I can just put through a big bowl corder and
it not matter. And like I'm not saying not matter, but like not matter to him. Like we have everything allocated though so liked I do my budget and cash flow system and you know, as I have explained before, everything goes into the one account, but it's all automated. It goes to our mortgaget, goes to our savings and our investments, and we have, you know, different amounts for
different things. We used to have our own spending accounts, and it just got a little bit too messy because I was doing most of you know, one thing and he was doing something else, and then it swaps and it just became honestly messy. So this is now what's currently working for us, But I am acutely aware that that does not work for a lot of other people. And I'm also speaking from i would say, a place of very very high privilege, because let's be very blunt,
I'm not an average income earner. We do have a bit more disposable income, so that if I buy one hundred and twenty dollar dress, my husband's not mad at me because that was eating into the grocery bills.
Yea, I do have budget that you brought up just before, that is overlaid over generally shared account right like that for us, it's allocated to bills and groceries. You for someone else, they might have their discretionary spending included in that. But it sounds like our listener they either have a budget allocated and her spending has gone over that and maybe that's why he's upset, or they haven't spoken about the breakdown, and so.
That's what boundaries were in place. Yes, I would take a step back and be like, all right, let's put this seven hundred and fifty dollars expense to the side and let's have an adult conversation where we don't ignore each other. Yes, and go, actually, what did you think the boundaries on this account was? Ah, they're different to what I thought they were. I thought that it was just our money and we could spend it however we want.
Maybe you're in the situation where you don't actually have a very good budget at the moment, so you're not actually allocating money for rent and allocating you just have a big pool of cash and you just thought it didn't matter, when in reality your partner's freaking out because they know Regroe's due next month and they're like, what are you doing taking that out of there? Like, we've got a big expense coming up. So I think for me, my budget and cash flow system works really well because
we are so structured. In the background. I know I have this written, Jess. I know you're exactly the same because we budget very similarly. We literally use the same product it's my product law. But we know what's coming up, we know what's there and what we can and can't spends, And inherently I have in the back of my head if I'm going to go spend that one twenty ondred dress, I know it's not impactful because I've actually already allocated everything.
And my husband is across the same budget. We're on exactly the same Paige, So if he's spending money from our account, he knows it's okay because he's very aware of what else is being paid. But it just sounds like you are not aware of the boundaries that have been put in place for this account. You need to talk about that. And often having more structure is actually going to be better. And yeah, put you in a situation where you've got more success because there's.
No right or wrong, like we do it completely different ways.
Yeah, and that works. And pragmatically, we could wipe this whole conversation off the table and be like, oh, yes, how do you budget? And you go, oh, I use the sheese on the Money masterclass and I'll be like, yeah, same. Do you have joint account with your partner?
Yes?
Oh, me too. And you might assume that our banking systems are very similar because you just ticked two really big boxes about how we budget and then also how we view joint accounts and the reality years it couldn't be more different. We did ask the community a couple of questions.
Are you ready?
So we said, do you have a joint account with your partner? Sixty five percent of you said yes, which I was impressed with because I thought it would be less. Yeah, that is a lot. We said, if yes, if your partner put personal expenses on the joint account without telling you, would you be angry? Twenty one percent of you said yep, definitely, sixty seven percent said, well, it depends how much money it was, and twelve percent of you said, wouldn't care. I think it's fine to do.
So.
The overlay of that would be the boundaries of the account. Again, it's pretty sure the people saying I wouldn't care, I think that's fine, their boundary would be that that is also for personal spending. Yeah. Whereas if I say to my partner or you know, back when Steve was my boyfriend and we had a joint account together, it was literally for rent and groceries and electricity bills, pit spent from that, I think I would have flipped it. I would have been like, what are you doing sir? Yes,
So context is everything. We then asked, is your joint account only used for shared costs such as rent bills, groceries, holidays together, et cetera. Seventy one percent said yep, it's only for shared cost and then twenty nine percent said no, we put personal costs in there as well. That is the context we need about your account. Yes, definitely. We then said, do you have some guidelines with your partner
on how and what those shared accounts are used? For seventy three percent said yep, we set these when we got the account. Is I'm assuming not what our DM message I did? And twenty seven percent said, no, we
really relaxed and just go with whatever goes on. Just turn right now, that would never go like that would never work for just absolutely not absolutely, Like this woman uses up bank right, and the reason she's so in love with our bank, apart from the fact that it's just a good banking system, right, she can have savers for everything? How many savers if you currently got just cook, I think I have.
Like sixteen or something.
Yeah, sixteen different savings accounts that she just like breaks down the truly everything. And I look at her and I'm like, I am a legit ex financial advisor, and I could never it's perfectly I.
Mean perfectly sounds like cottious.
You have a fun for everything, so I know exactly what I can spend on clothes, exactly what I can spend on beauty.
I like that.
It just wakes up. But again it's so personal, right, Like I.
Love paying together, Like I've got like a little budget for like clothes and beauty and discretionary items, and if I spent it all on beauty while I don't get any clothes, whereas just as like no, I need balance.
I separated. Yeah, I separated out even further.
That's incredible.
So we then went to the community and said, what is your two cents and similar reactions to us? So what is wrong with him and his reaction? Why it's so intense? I think you need to have a deep conversation. Someone else said, I think what he's more upset about here is a lack of communication. Communication is key. Someone said, you both should still get discretionary spending in your own accounts, which is fair, but we're talking about a joint account.
A heap of you actually DMed and said we gott to need more context here, and I'm like, sorry, sis, we weren't provided with that context. And that's half the fun of these dms. We can assume someone else said, I'd rather him put it on the joint account than keep his spending.
A secret interesting way to it.
Yeah, okay, and I mean that makes sense. But like in your situation, Jess, it's very clear that your money's your money and your partner's money is your partner's money, and you split it however you've decided to split it. Yeah, Like, I don't know if in your situation you'd be that happy with your partner critiquing what you're spending and him being like, oh, well, you do spend more than me.
That's not the point, which is why I like personally, for me and my situation, I like the idea of having your own separate spending account because it does take out that need to answer to somebody. You go, yeah, okay, whatever, you know, I've worked out from my budget and you've worked out from your budget that we have to spend independently. We spend independently and you don't answer to anybody. It's
kind of like we're both adults. Spend it how you want. Like, if you want to spy five hundred chocolate eggs because they're already out, you go like, girl, buy yourself some cabridery milk eggs. Can you tell what I'm thinking about doing?
A life?
I am living?
About them?
Living is so hard because complete side note. I was in the supermarket the other day with my husband and he looked at the Easter installation and he was like, didn't we have Christmas yesterday? And I said, yeah, we did. And he looked at me dead in the eyes and said, Jessel love.
This, And I was like, he knows me so well.
I was like, yeah, she will. But that's also really funny. It's very clear back to our DM two senses. Someone said anything over one hundred dollars being purchased has to be discussed in our house, which I think is very very fair. Someone did a whole heap of red flag emojis and said, the delivery, it's a conversation. Sorry he approached it that way, Yeah, manchild, I was like, the
delivery was not good. Yes, his reaction is immature, but this actually should have been a conversation before spending, irrespective of how he responded. Yeah, So, like, I know he responded incorrectly. I think we can all agree on that. Yes, but like, at the end of the day, seven hundred and fifty dollars is a lot of money. That is a lot. It is like, it is a lot of money in general to have in your account. It is a lot of money to then say I spent that
on the iconic Yeah, so lightly. I don't know if my husband did that or I did that. I kind of expect my husband to be like, well, what is this yeah, and ask me, because that's a bit rogue, especially without a discussion.
Oh sorry, I was just trying to calculate the shot back.
If it was upsized, it could be twenty percent, but sometimes it's not upsized right now, so I wouldn't have ordered anyway. Yeah.
Yeah, if you've spent that when it was upsides whatever that's called. I haven't experienced it yet, but yeah, so it'd be so mad.
So I think the TLDR of all of this is it's time to discuss the terms and conditions of your joint account together. Set some boundaries, keep some boundaries, and understand what that actually looks like, and have an honest adult conversation about it. Because even when we do stuff like this, like if it was the right thing to do ultimately, or even if it was the wrong thing to do ultimately, these conversations around money should always be respectful, and I think that that's the only way we can
move forward. So it just sounds like there's a few things going on, agreed myself. We're all done here, my love, so have the best weekend. I'm excited because money diaries are back on Monday, so we will see you then. Until then, enjoy your weekend. My loves, we love you.
Bye guys.
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