Hello, my name's Santasha Nabananga Bamblet. I'm a proud yr the Order Kerney Whoalbury and a waddery woman. And before we get started on She's on the Money podcast, I would like to acknowledge the traditional custodians of the land of which this podcast is recorded on a wondery country, acknowledging the elders, the ancestors and the next generation coming through.
As this podcast is about connecting, empowering, knowledge sharing and the storytelling of you to make a difference for today and lasting impact for tomorrow.
Let's get into it.
She's on the Money, She's on the Money.
Hello, and welcome to She's on the Money, the podcast Millennials who want Financial Freedom. Today is Friday, which means it's time to get the team together or as many of us as we can find, and celebrate you the
incredible She's in the Money community. Today, all we sharing my favorite money in Beck is going to be sharing her best broke tips, and we're going to be unpacking something that you slid into our DMS about which this week is all about covering the cost of last minute wedding guest cancelations and that one got very very juicy, very quickly to stick around. If you're listening today knowing Victoria, you sound so different or yes, you make that joke
every time Victoria is not here. Surprise Victoria is missing, poor dol. She's got bronchitis, so she probably also doesn't sound like Victoria either right now, sound like.
A weathered man, really raspy.
Yeah, little I love it when you have that like last day of sick, little little bit of.
Oh my gosh, I love a bit of last day of sick raspiness. Yeah, need to silver lining for sure. Yeah, so she's that to look for to you. But sadly she's not here. So Beck and I are holding down the fort this week. But we hope you bear with this and enjoy regardless.
How is your week?
Than it was really nice. It's been really nice.
As you know, as I was mentioning off air, this week has been top of mine right now is I'm trying to get jacked. So lots of gym love, lots of pub, lots of going out.
I'm just living life.
I'm a dream so excited, it's almost Christmas.
It's just good vibes all round.
Yeah, great week, and this is really insensitive for me because I know your week already a weef.
Oh no, I just I totally forgot. But how was your week?
I don't even know how honest to be, I had like the worst twenty four hours ever. I flatted my house by my own fault. I left the bath running because I was just doing a million things, and as you guys know, I'm renting, so I felt extra just terrible because it's not my house to ruin. Not that you want to ruin any house, but like I feel extra bad because it's not mine. So that happened. And then the same day, my car battery stopped working, so
I had to replace the car battery. Obviously, when I flooded the house, I used every available piece of material to mop up the water. It was, when I say it, like I flooded the house like it. I did a really good job of it, which the one time you'd really preferred to do a shitty job or something, I really nailed it. So I like every sheet, every towel, every pillowcase, like anything that was made of fabric. Every
blanket was on our floor. And so our bath tarby is currently full of wet items that I need to launder. And then I was doing like my eighth float of laundry for the day yesterday, and the washing machine started leaking, so yes, that was going really well. And then I broken ale just to really cap it off, broken ail and ripped a dress. Was like, and this is all in the space of twenty four hours, and I just I can't take any more.
Like that is so weird.
I want to know what your co star is saying, what are your horoscopes saying, Like maybe there's something in the air, Like why is this all happening to your.
Own I don't know, but I feel like it's because I'm an idiot, and I just it's been like this all happened at the start of the week and it's just colored the rest. And I know that, you know, there are much worse things happening, and there are people that have it so much worse than me. But I found it really hard to pull my head out of my ass a little bit and snap out of it.
And this is so silly. We had to take our Christmas tree down because it was in the area that flooded, and when I flooded everything, I was home alone, and so my tactic was get everything out, so like em deal the rooms, get all the furniture, everything off the floors so I could mop everything really properly. And we paid for someone obviously to come and do the best as they could, and of course we obviously have spoken to our property manager, like this isn't a secret or anything,
but I got everything out. But I took down the tree and I haven't put it back up because I was like, well, presumably someone's gonna have to come repair the floors, and I don't want to make their life harder by having more stuff out, so I put it away. And now I feel sad and enjoy of Christmas is just gone a little bit. Like I I found it really hard. If you follow me on Instagram, you would know that I've been going hard on Christmas, Like I've
been decorating. I've been having lots of fun, living my best life, and then like I took down the tree and I just had this really really bad twenty four hours and I've just gone. It's just it's like the mat I feel like the Grinch.
Yeah, that my ic is gone.
I feel really sad and really stressed and very silly for feeling sad and stressed and flooming my house. Like, ultimately, I think my frustration stems from the fact that I know that it's all my own fault. Sure, Like if I just hadn't been stupid, Oh.
My gosh, it was so avoidable. Is that like a hundred per Yeah, yeah, I get you.
I get you.
Yeah, there's no worse feeling when something is so inconvenient it ruins several days of your life.
Yeah, and you know you could have avoided it. Wowow.
But also like you do put a lot of effort into Christmas decorations. I mean it looks amazing, so I get it, and you're so considerate for being like I'm going to have a beer lound room, yeah, just in case someone needs to come in.
And yeah, the house is very sad looking. That's okay.
All they say. Once you hit rock bottom, there's nowhere to go but up.
Oh god, if someone hasn't up for me right now, I would love to hear it totally rock bottom.
Yeah.
I was going to say, I don't know how much worse it could get, but I need something would touch because I just well, so yeah, I don't know anyway, moving right along, Yes, sorry for trouble dumping on the listener.
No, you're allowed.
This is a safe space, happy place. Let's talk about some money wins.
Yes, good idea.
My first money in this week is a goody. It comes from Heather. She's feeling very on brand with you, very in sync with you this week, Beck, She said, Camart, I've been donating to the gym aka not going because I'm a lazy girl who struggles to leave my house to exercise. So I brought the gym to me. I set up under my house and just watch YouTube workouts. She's bought all of her little bits and pieces from Kmart.
She's got some weights and a matt and some other things that I don't even know what you do with. But good on new queen. And she said, this cost me under one hundred dollars compared to forty dollars a week for a membership that I wasn't even using. It's super fun and I feel comfortable in my own home.
That's amazing.
And came out have some really good like exercise equipment.
Yeah, I have some weights and stuff from them, and they like cute pastoral colors and I mean like a weight is away right, Like how totally? But it's always a little bit nice when it's pretty one hundred percent. Next, I've got a money in from Chloe who said I tore a hole in my jeans and instead of buying a new pair, I've bought an iron on repair patch for five bucks from Spotlight. The hole is not obvious at all, and I get longer wear out of the jeans.
That is cool. And also those little patches, they're kind of cool. They're fine.
You can get like smiley faced ones and stuff. Yeah, I'm assuming she just got one that goes behind because she said you can't even really see it, But I mean, how good. And you spend so long breaking your jeans in There is nothing worse than buying a brand new pair of jeans when you've got your favorite one that yeah, fity perfect and.
They're just fitting right.
Yeah.
But also holes are kind of in fashion. I don't know, actually I don't know fashion.
But it depends where they are and it depends how old you are.
That's true.
That's because if you are someone they made that joke, how did you pay half pricey jeans because half of them is missing?
Okay, that is boomer, but I really think it's kind of funny.
I appreciate that rated top points from Beck. Next, I've got a money win from Lisa, who said money win. I really wanted a pedicure, but I didn't have time to go to the foot in foot out, so I don't even know what that sounds A cola, No, it's is the pedicurest place. But I don't really know what put in the foot out me. I've never had a pedicure. I'm not educated. But she said, instead, her sweet seven year old daughter did her toes at home for her.
She saved some money and little miss loved doing the painting.
Oh my gosh.
And she's probably training up to be maybe her full time pedicurist.
Literally, get the girl some YouTube videos, basic tool and put her to work.
What else are kids for?
Literally, if you know what I mean, labor within the home, you went home within the home of course. Next, I've got Natalie who said money win. During Black Friday, I went on shop back just to have a look, and I saw Expedia were doing thirteen percent cash back on hotel bookings, so I booked myself four nights in London in a hotel I had previously looked at for twelve hundred dollars. I got it on sale for six hundred and ninety and I got thirty five dollars cash back chuching.
Oh my gosh, go off coin. That is so good. I like the casual.
I booked myself four nights in London.
Yeah, yeah, that's well worth it. If you get thirty five bucks back.
That's it. And she got the thing half price as well, so that sounds.
Yeah, that is actually really really cool.
Lastly, I've got a money win from Shelby, who said I received this email from my real estate and I was honestly so shocked that this happened. The money from one week of my rent will pay my Airbnb for my Melbourne troop to see Taylor Swift honestly so generous, and she's popped in a screenshot and this email from her real estate agent says, guys, hope you've both been
doing well. The owner would like to gift you one week of free rent for the Christmas period to say thank you for being great tenants.
That is so nice.
How lovely is that? It's so nice, so thoughtful and consider and obviously not everybody can do that, but if you are in the position too, what a lovely, thoughtful thing, and how nice to say thank you to your tenants for me and good tenants presumably not flooding your house.
Yes, ideally, ideally, that is really lovely.
That's everything that I've got this week.
Okay, Well, if you don't mind, may I share my brogue tips?
I would like nothing more.
Okay, So this week I have obviously two from the community, one from myself. So the first one comes from Christy who has basically said that she found this really cool app. It's called half Price, and it basically just shows you everything that's half priced in woolies and coals in particular for the week, so you can just add them to
the shopping list and go off. Just next time you're in the shops, before you go in, just sit in your car for a little while, go in half Price, see what's going on, try and like plan your week out.
Yeah.
I just think that's the most convenient thing ever, Like I had no idea this existed, So I'm absolutely going to download this as soon as we finish up here. Half Price just in case you didn't get that. Okay.
The next one comes from Ebony.
I really like this one because she's saying, like, obviously it was Black Friday sales not too long ago, and a lot of people are upgrading their televisions, their fridges. I don't know all their appliances and stuff. It is a little bit cheeky. So basically, instead of buying everything that is on sale, even if you need to upgrade your own home appliances, your TVs or whatever, other people are going to be selling those things when they upgrade.
So what we're going to be doing is not buying anything in store.
We're going to be going on Marketplace, on gum Tree, on all these other resale places and looking for people who are selling their still.
Good, but now upgraded everything.
I keep saying TV, but I'm talking about you know whatever, microwaves to people sell microwaves, I'm sure they do. Yeah, put all the little things in your house so you feel like you need to upgrade, don't buy it brand new. Wait for other people to do that for you and sell their own things.
Honestly, Yeah, absolutely, that's so smart. I have done that. I want the vacuum now I'm selling old vacuum, Yes, exactly. Why not pick up a bargain and you don't need the newest top of the line whatever, like an old grade is still just going.
From point A to point B totally.
That is such a good tip.
Yes, and it's always you know, it's a little bit cheaper, it's a little bit more affordable whatever.
Just circular economy too. Such a big fan of the circular economy.
Reduced through recycle exactly.
Same. What about your broke tip?
So my broke tip.
I don't know if you've heard about this, and I also don't know if it's just in Melbourne.
I'm sure it's in other places as well, but here we have what's called rough trade. Have you heard about rough trade?
No? So it's this Facebook group. Try and check it out and see if you haven't a equi where you are, maybe Sydney, wherever you are. But in Melbourne we do have a rough trade. And what I used to do is if I was like really broke one week, I would be like, okay, let me look around my house and I'm going to put up a random desk chair. What you can do is because sometimes if you actually sell that on marketplace, you don't get much money, maybe like ten twenty bucks whatever. It might not be actually
worth anything, but you put it on rough Trade. You say, hey, guys, here's an office chair I want to swap for soy milk, coffee, grinds rice, And you go in and you basically say what you want to swap your whatever it is for, and.
You get it.
So I've gotten so many things over my time. I've been like, oh my gosh, I like have to go to a dinner party tonight and I have no dessert, So I'm swapping my microwave for an entire krock and bush, you know what I mean. Like, you know, obviously that's like a crazy example, but really rough trade is so good. You might find people wanting to trade for nothing. They might be like, hey, guys, just take this off my hand,
I don't need it whatever. Same as like the free section in like gum Tree or Marketplace or whatever.
But with this it's.
More, you know, you can actually use, you can actually see what you're getting out of it, you know. So I would recommend that if you're having a week where you literally just can't afford groceries, find something in your house that you want to trade for a bag of rice.
Yeah, just something, you know what I mean. So trade in Melbourne.
I'm sure there are equivalents elsewhere. I would recommend that just if you're going through a tough time and have some things around the house that you could get rid of.
That's really cool. Does that exist on that page? To people also trade skills? That's a very good question, because you could do. We're having this conversation in our friend group because my partner is are physio and our friends will just be like, oh, like community exercises, and of course I'm always happy to but I was saying it works really well because like one of our other friends is a plumber, and I was like, well, when my toilet wasn't flushing, I was asking Daniel, how do I
fix this? I didn't want to pay someone to come out, so it would be really cool if you could do the same thing. I don't know if on rough trade or even within your friendship group. It's like sharing skills, I think right now, when we're all super strapped for cash, being like, hey, like I need someone to come and replace all my light bulbs.
I'll pay you in cookies.
Or you know, I'll design a beautiful piece of artwork for you, because obviously you're an artist, so like I could trade you a piece of artwork for your help or something like that. Like, I feel like that if it doesn't exist, it would be very cool if it did exist.
That is a great idea. I really think you're under something. Yeah, try to flop that up.
Yeah, definitely, zero skills set, just a fun idea.
Yeah, definitely. Yess that's a great idea.
All right, Well there we go.
Let's go on a quick break and try and actually develop this app while where over a tea?
Are you comfortable with that?
Yeah, let's set a time. Be right back.
Yeah, welcome back everyone. This week, we are skipping money Dilemma because I worry that it's maybe a little bit triggering for you considering the amount of money dilemmas you are currently going through.
But we also thought.
Maybe we'd just like wait for VD because I don't know she might be I don't want I don't want to have fomo.
We wanted to weigh in.
We wanted to wait in.
You know, I think that leaves us with the DM, the juicy, juicy DM that I don't know about you.
This is all I look forward to. Yes, let's go.
There's lots to unpack this week. So our DM this week says, Hey, Tim, I have a dilemma. Forew I'm having an interstate wedding next week. I gave everyone a Save the Date one and a half years ago and formal invitations in January this year. Most people formerly a RSVP By July. It's now one week out from the wedding, and I have already given the confirmed numbers to the venue and paid the outstanding amount, which was eighteen six
hundred dollars. Within the last week. Ten guests who had previously rsvped that they were coming have now canceled, citing that it's too expensive for them to travel into state, and I am scrambling to cover their seats. Otherwise I'm effectively wasting two thousand dollars. Is it reasonable to request that they cover these costs themselves? How do I ask them without sounding like an asshole?
Oh my gosh, this is a good one. Weddings are so expensive.
Yeah, okay, so I guess. So she's not literally losing two thousand because she's already paid for it, but there will be literally ten seats that are not wasted.
Yes, that is such a tough one, I would say.
I guess it is on the people that are literally canceling, like a week out. I feel like that's that's that's really not okay, that's quite rude. Even if the wedding was in state, how do I say that? Not interstate? In state, state at home, at home basically, but I like, I just don't think canceling that close to the wedding anywhere it is, no matter what the situation is, is ever really okay. It just doesn't feel good. It feels a little bit like, I don't know, you're really putting
some people out. So, but requesting the money is a real tough one. Maybe just I would I would explain the situation to them and be like, hey, this is what's happened. Like a lot of people are canceling now because they can't afford it, which is totally fair.
Would you be willing to just chip in?
Or their wedding present might be one hundred bucks in a card or something like that, you know, but I guess because they can't afford to go into state, they might not be able to afford to chip in. So that's where we are left. I would just I would simply just ask the question. I would present them with my dilemma. Yeah, see what they say, Yeah, you never know.
Do you think that they would have known more than a week in advance that they weren't going to be able to afford to go on this trip?
You would think so, Yeah.
Because if they've RSVP'd, they got to say the day a year and a half ago, seth a year and a half that they potentially could have spent saving and then RSVPs would you in July and we're now in almost or we are in December? Oh my gosh, we're in December.
Whoa.
Well, so they've had five or six months to save. Do you think at some point prior to the week before the wedding they probably could have gone, oh, it looks like it's not going to work financially.
Probably unless they had a Jessica Ricky kind of night with flooding and everything disaster.
But surely you'd you would everything.
That's what I was gonna say. Would not have booked your accommodation and your transport prior to like, you wouldn't be booking it the week before?
Surely?
Yeah?
True, they probably did know purposely didn't book Yeah, and then a week out.
Yeah, that's true. Actually, that's kind of sneaky.
I think it's the weak out thing that's bothering me because I can understand if you had rsvp'ed yes at the start of the year. Twelve months is a long time, you know. I understand that there is a financial burden to travel into state, but I also think, like, could you have started working into a budget and you're totally right, like as I have seen this week, when things come
up like unexpected expenses, people are only human. However, I would have thought that you would kind of be planning and preparing a lot sooner to the point where you would have known a lot sooner if it wasn't going to work. Yeah, And for ten it's not one person has bailed on this way and gone, oh, I'm so sorry my house flooded. I can't like I need to sell my flights or something.
Ten people is a lot of.
People, Yes, So the chances of that kind of being everyone's same situation, it's kind of I'm like, if you got to a week out of a wedding, you realize you didn't have any money, maybe you flooded your apartment, maybe all these things came up and you had to cancel.
Would you be willing to cover the cost of your own seat.
I think so absolutely, Like when I like with not to make it all thatt me, but when I flooded the house, I said, we'll pay for the insurance excess, like that made sense.
True.
Well, if you couldn't afford to go over to go.
Into state and you were actually like scrambling for money, like, would you still cover your seat?
I think I would say. If I physically didn't have the money to give right now, I think I would say, Hey, I'm so sorry, Like this emergencies come up, I don't have the money to travel. I would love to cover my seat. Can I pay it back to you within the next three months? Or can I pay it back on an install a plan or as soon as I get back on my feet, can I pay it? Would be the first thing that I would want to say, because to me, I would want to be communicating to
the person getting married. I don't want to put you out, like I understand that you've paid for me. I understand that this has happened. You know, I don't want to put you on the back foot because of my emergency and whether or not I can cover that right now totally depends on your situation, but I think that there is an element of responsibility if you have committed to
going to something, they've invested in it financially too. Yeah, and that's where I kind of I know it's hard because it's the bride and groom of chosen to get married in to state, But I think you had the opportunity to say no, You had the opportunity to say if it didn't come up last minute. I do think there is an element of responsibility on you to help with those like that financial situation.
I do agree. I actually agree.
But you were saying before, when you were just skimming through the responses, your mind kind of change because right now I think we're both like the person canceling should be paying for this seat, whether it's now, whether it's later.
Yes, all right, well let me tell you first. We did ask a couple of questions. He said, do you think the guests should have to cover the cost due to their late cancelation? Fifty one percent yes, because they aresvp'ed attending. Forty nine percent said no, they clearly don't have the money to pay, so almost a perfect split, which is okay. Then we said, if yes, would you take action and ask for the money. Seven percent said yes, I would ask for the cost of the entire seat.
Twenty nine percent said yes, but I would just ask for a percentage of the cost. Sixty three percent said no, I would just accept it as a loss and move on. Okay. Next, we asked, if you were the guest who canceled late, would you be happy to pay back the cost of your seat. Fifty three percent said yes and forty seven percent said no, so again very close to an even
Sapit close. Then we said, have you ever been invited to a destination wedding and had to say no due to the cost of travel and a com Fifty three percent said yes, forty seven percent said no, which is totally understandable. It is expensive to travel. And lastly, we said, if you said yes, how did the people having the wedding respond? Eighty six percent of people completely understood, ten percent of people said they were disappointed and expected to pay.
Four percent of people said they were offered to cover the cost for them.
Oh, that's nice.
Which is very nice. And then we of course asked for your two cents, and there was a really very much like the poll. Responses were super duper split kind of in one camp or the other. So let me read a couple to you. One person said, she's paying the same whether they come or didn't come. It's not going to cost her anything, so why should they have to pay, which is kind of what you said at the start.
Yeah, I see.
Someone else said, I don't understand why they have only worked out a week out that it's too expensive. It is so rude to cancel that late. If it was four months ago, it would be different. It's the timing of it. Yes, someone said, this is extremely late. The cancelation is the issue, no stress. If they were up front early. Someone else said, they chose to have a destination wedding. The responsibility is on them. It's a big ask for the people attending.
But oh, they gave so much notice.
That's for me a year and a half, assuming that they put in their save the date that it was going to be an inter stay wedding, which is a lot of time for somebody to prepare. Someone suggested that maybe they could invite more guests to cover the seats
so that you're not awkwardly asking for the money. But you still have people filling in, so it kind of feels like a little bit of an even out, although if you got an invite to a wedding the week before, you'd probably know that you were a seat filler, which is again potentially a little bit awkward.
Yeah, I see, I see.
Someone else has made the point that maybe they could afford it previously, but with the cost of living going up, maybe they can't afford it anymore, although I do still kind of wonder when were they planning on booking their seat.
Yeah, that's the thing that keeps a current theme.
Yeah.
A couple of people made good suggestions on potential resolutions. One person said, I wouldn't be surprised if these guests still gave them a present. Isn't the gift exchange typically what you pay to cut the cost of your seat, So perhaps they will still give them the gift. Someone else said, I was curious to get my partner's thoughts
on this. We both thought to suggest a cash gift contribution to the honeymoon house whatever's next in their absence kind of takes the edge off asking to pay for the seat outright, but can also be a choice of how much to contribute and could easily be put towards covering the costs of the seat. What do you sit on wedding gifts?
Actually, because that's another yes, exactly. My My biggest gripe about people being in love.
Is I don't want to be paying for hen's party gifts.
Maybe you don't have to get a present for that, but you do have to pay your for your dinner. You to pay a big amount for like whatever you're doing that night. You have to pay for an engagement party gift, You have to pay for wedding gift.
You have to pay for maybe a baby gift. So many presents.
Yeah, and I just want to stick to birthday presents or Christmas presents. I don't like wedding gifts. Yeah, I get the idea. I don't like him. Sorry, hate it.
I feel weird about cash. And I really understand. I understand the cat. You know, people say, contribute to our wishing well or something like that. I understand that. You know, as the person throwing the wedding, you're probably like, well, I'd rather have the cash than a cash roll dish. And I understand that, but something about it feels very transactional to me.
Yeah, and I always get.
Really caught up because it's so clear the amount that you're giving as well, because if you buy a gift, maybe you can purchase something nice to get it on sale, or maybe you can make them something beautiful that's worth a lot emotionally but maybe not financially, or there are all of these different options, but to me, it really feels a bit like cards on the table. I think your wedding is worth one hundred.
Shops, Yes, exactly.
It feels a bit uncomfortable to this.
I totally agree, And.
It's hard in this situation because we don't know how Oh. I suppose you could do the math, actually, but these guests probably don't know exactly how much the seed is. So I think regardless, she's going to have to have a conversation with them in some way, shape or form, and I don't really know what the right way to approach that is. Someone did suggest checking out Deerman Skill demon Skill d ar M a M. Apparently it's a
communication tool from therapy. This was sent in shockingly by a therapist and they said there's a great app called the Dime Game which can help them work out how assertively they should ask oh, which I don't know anything about. What this is. But I do like the idea of kind of figuring out where to start the conversation because it is one of those things. I feel like you could come in a bit too hot, yes, especially if you're upset, which sounds a bit like our listener might be.
If you come in all guns blazing, like, look, not coming to the wedding, pay for your seat. And there were a few people responding saying one of two ways, either you know, do you value this friendship is it worth getting into a fight over? Or people saying kick them to the curb girlfriends like they're clearly not a real friend.
Keep ten friends to the curves. That's aubcision. That's a big loss.
Yeah, it's really hard.
I think ideally, the people who aren't coming anymore, they will give a hoefully cash gift that will contribute to the wedding, so she doesn't feel like she's missing out on too much. Maybe the seats will go unsat in, but she wouldn't have got that money back regardless, I imagine. Yeah, so they're they're not there, it all comes out in the wash. Hopefully she gets some cash gifts, yeah, and everyone feels okay.
Yeah, and maybe It is about having a nice conversation, Yeah, communicating and saying I understand if you're having a hard time financially. I don't want to put any pressure on you. You know. I wish that you had been able to tell me sooner, because now I am out financially. I've spent two hundred dollars on your seat that will now
be empty or something of the sort. And maybe that also will help to make them aware of the impact that they're having, because they might not realize that she's paid for their dinner and all of those kinds of things, and those costs add up very quickly.
Absolutely, maybe that's the nice way to approach it. Yeah, think it's so true.
I feel like that's all I've got to give today. What about you?
I think same same. I feel very satisfied with this happy frayya.
Everybody, don't forget we're doing our twelve days of giveaways over on Instagram. We have given away some amazing prizes already and we have so many more to give where at she's on the money aus. If you want to participate, jump in the Facebook group too, because we do love asking our juicy questions in there as well. But otherwise, have the absolute best weekend and VD will be back bright and early on Monday with a money diary for you. Why guys see letter.
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