My Two Biggest Losses (Episode 13)

Episode Description:

In this episode, Kevin talks about the two biggest losses in his life, which strangely were material losses.

Intro and outro music by Lundstroem

To shadow slow, go to 4:51

To shadow fast, go to 16:37

Tags: #biggest losses #shadowenglish #episode 13 #improveenglishspeaking #englishlearning #podcast

Transcript:

Today, I wanted to share with you a story about two losses in my life. This is personal, and it might seem ridiculous because when people usually talk about loss, they refer to someone important they have lost, like a family member or friend. However, I have been relatively lucky and privileged, as I have not experienced any major losses in my life. I have lost grandparents, but I was quite young and not very close to them. I did have a friend who died when we were both 16, but we weren't that close either. I have also lost pets, and one pet, in particular, felt like a significant loss to me. But the two most devastating losses that I can recall were when I lost material possessions, and this is why it might sound ridiculous or superficial.

My first experience occurred when I was around 18. I lost my CD case that contained all the music I had collected over the years, which I felt was a significant part of my life. Actually, they were stolen. A friend of mine asked if he could borrow my CDs for a party, and I said, "Sure, why not." However, at this party, someone stole them, and they were gone forever. At the time, my music collection felt like a substantial part of my identity. I believe this is true for most people, as the music you listen to as a teenager has the most significant impact on your life. People often continue to listen to the music they enjoyed in their youth decades later. So, it's little wonder why losing the music I loved as a teenager hurt so much. It might seem ridiculous now, considering that CDs are no longer in common use, and everyone can instantly stream their favorite music. However, in the 90s, we didn't have that luxury, so personal CD collections were greatly cherished.

My other significant loss was also material. When I was around 22 years old and attending college, my roommate used my computer and, for some reason, reformatted my hard drive, deleting all the files I had saved. To this day, I still don't have a clear idea of why he did that. Perhaps I was too angry to understand his explanation.

This loss may be more relatable to young people today than my CD case story. Imagine someone using your smartphone and deleting all your photos and apps. That's essentially what happened to me—I lost everything I had ever written, taken pictures of, and recorded in home videos up until that point. Of course, it was my fault for not backing up these files on a separate hard disk. But I never imagined my roommate would do such a thing. I was livid.

In both situations, losing my music CDs and all the important files on my computer made me very angry and depressed because I had wrapped my identity around those things. However, there were two silver linings that emerged from these incidents: First, I realized the impermanence of everything in life. Second, I realized that my identity and self-worth should not be dependent on material possessions. Both of these realizations have kept me grounded and helped me think more about death in a constructive manner. It might sound ridiculous because I have been fortunate enough not to lose someone very close to me yet. However, maybe these incidents have helped prepare me for when that time inevitably comes. The death that can help you cope with all deaths is ego death. By losing those things to which I associated my identity, it helped me let go of my ego a little.