SexTok with Tracey and Kelsey - podcast cover

SexTok with Tracey and Kelsey

Produced by Zibby Audiowww.sextokpod.com

This weekly show pairs international sex expert Tracey Cox and comic Kelsey Chittick as they discuss three anonymously sourced question each week about sex and relationships. 


Laugh-out-loud funny, irreverent, British, international sex expert and author of 17 books Tracey answers questions posed by witty author and former stand-up comedienne Kelsey Chittick, such as:


How much should I really share with my girlfriends? 

What do I do about my husband's work wife? 

How often should we really be getting it on?! 


Have your own questions?! Enter them anonymously at www.sextokpod.com


A Zibby Audio production

Music by Morning Moon Music

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Episodes

S5 Ep. 1 Loss of Desire, Loud Lovers, and How to Tell my Long-Term Partner I've Had Herpes the Whole Time

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I have lost all desire to have sex: my libido has completely disappeared. I don’t want to have sex with my partner, I don’t masturbate, I don’t feel anything when I do attempt to have sex with him. I’m only 42. This isn’t a sudden thing, desire just gently slipped away. What’s wrong with me and what can be done to fix it? 2) My new boyfriend is too loud in bed. He’s loud out of it as well, but that’s not the problem. ...

Mar 29, 202324 minSeason 5Ep. 1

S4 Ep. 10: Religion and Sex, Playing the Field, and How Do I Tell My Partner I Enjoy Choking

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I grew up with religious parents and I’ve had it drummed into me from a very early age that sex is for procreation, not recreation: You do it to have kids and not for pleasure. I am now married to a man who isn’t religious and who has taught me that sex is something adults enjoy. I know intellectually that he's right, but it’s like my body hasn’t caught up with me. I still find it very difficult to relax and enjoy the...

Feb 22, 202324 minSeason 4Ep. 10

S4 Ep. 9: How to Find a High-End Sex Club, Is Spontaneous Sex Important, and I've Gone Off Sex Since My Daughter was Born

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’ve always wanted to visit a high-end sex club and now that my relationship has finished, it's a good time to do it. The thing is, I have no clue where to start to find one? I don’t want anywhere tacky or sleazy. I’m a straight woman; though, I do confess—I’m a little bi-curious. 2) I’ve just married a man I’ve been with 5 years. We have pretty decent sex, but I worry that it’s not spontaneous. We do it once or twice...

Feb 15, 202327 minSeason 4Ep. 9

S4 Ep. 8: Why Do I Run When the Sex Wanes, Do Women Have Anal Just to Please Men, and How Do I Deal with 'Hot Air'?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) This is a very personal question that’s highly embarrassing. When I have sex with my partner, wind comes out of my vagina. The first time it happened I was mortified but my partner just kept pumping away and didn’t mention it. It happens on a regular basis and destroys the mood for me though he doesn’t seem to care. How can I stop this happening? 2) I’m 36 and I’ve stopped counting the number of relationships I’ve had...

Feb 08, 202321 minSeason 4Ep. 8

S4 Ep. 7: Sex with a Man 20 Years Older, What to do If He Falls Out, and How to Tell Someone They're Not the Lover They Think They Are

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) My partner always falls out when we have sex. It’s frustrating and interrupts the flow. Is there a reason why this is happening and how do we stop it? 2) My boyfriend thinks he’s great in bed – he told me right at the start that all his exes say he’s the best lover they’ve ever had. He’s a nice man otherwise and has a good sense of humour so I thought he was just boasting in a joking way. I was wrong. He takes himself...

Feb 01, 202321 minSeason 4Ep. 7

S4 Ep. 6: Why Can I Only Orgasm Alone, Do Women Like Hairy Men, and Will I Regret Leaving My Husband?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) Why is it that I can orgasm easily on my own (using my fingers or a vibrator) but have never had an orgasm with a partner? So many boyfriends have said, ‘Oh, but you’ve never had sex with ME!”, convinced they will be the one to make it happen. But it never does. I came close with my ex whose technique was excellent, but still couldn’t tip over the edge. 2) I am a guy in my early 40s. My partner of 20 years passed away...

Jan 25, 202326 minSeason 4Ep. 6

S4 Ep. 5: Is It Okay if My Husband Follows Model and Porn Star Accounts, Mixing Up Missionary, and Is My Man Faking It?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) Don’t give me a hard time because it sounds boring; but, missionary is my favorite position—it just works for us. Can you suggest some ways to mix it up a little to keep things interesting? 2) I’ve been married for 25 years and love my husband, but my self-confidence has taken a dive. Five years ago, my husband became very close friends with a new (and beautiful) co-worker. This was the first time I had to deal with h...

Jan 18, 202328 minSeason 4Ep. 5

S4 Ep. 4: I Can Only Orgasm with My Vibrator, Sex During Your Period, and Fixating on Fairytale Encounters

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m a woman in my early 40s and my problem is that I can only orgasm with a clitoral vibrator. I can reach orgasm on my own or with my partner, but only if I use vibration. I’ve never had an orgasm another way. I have tried SO hard on my own using fingers, but I don’t get even close. How do I change this? My current partner would love to make me orgasm. I’ve stopped using any sex toys as I want it to happen with him o...

Jan 11, 202325 minSeason 4Ep. 4

S4 Ep. 3: Weed and Desire, Sex after Breast Cancer, and How to Hit the 'Reset' Button for Sex

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I don’t know where to start but please help because our sex life is such a mess! We’ve been married for 12 years and it’s the usual story: things started out great, then we got bored and sex got less and less frequent. Now we barely do it and it’s awkward and not pleasurable. Don’t tell me to try something new because it’s beyond that. I wish we could wipe the slate clean and start again. What advice do you have for m...

Jan 04, 202328 minSeason 4Ep. 3

S4 Ep. 2: Pubic Hair, B reast Play, and Dealing with a 'Man-Child'

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I have an issue with pubic hair. Basically, I’m not a fan and like it well-manicured on both women and men. I shave my testicles and keep the rest neatly trimmed. My wife however has a laissez-faire attitude and sports a luxuriant bush though she does trim it before a beach vacation. I know that the issue is mine, no doubt a result of conditioning from porn. But I find hairy bits and pieces a turn off. Should I try to...

Dec 28, 202220 minSeason 4Ep. 2

S4 Ep. 1: Can You Spot a Cheater, How to Impress that Very First Time, and How to Make Him Last Longer

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’ve gone from one extreme to another. My previous partner used to take so long to orgasm during intercourse, I’d be practically asleep. With my new boyfriend, it’s over within two minutes. I really like him and want to make this work. I don’t want him to go on for hours but 10 or so minutes would be good. How can I help him last longer? 2) I have been cheated on all my life and I don’t think I will survive if another...

Dec 21, 202228 minSeason 4Ep. 1

S3 Ep. 10: He Can't Find my Clitoris, Sex as a Widow, and Why Has My Affair Made Sex Hotter with My Husband?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m having an affair and ironically, sex with my husband has never been better. It’s confusing me. I was all set to leave, but now I’m not sure. We were stuck in a rut for years and nothing seemed to make a difference, but now I can feel new life breathing into the marriage. The question is: Is it going to last? 2) My new boyfriend is enthusiastic about giving me oral sex but he clearly has no clue where my clitoris i...

Nov 16, 202229 minSeason 3Ep. 10

S3 Ep. 9: A New Technique, Friends that Turn on You After an Affair, and Sex Gifts that Won't Make You Cringe

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) My husband has been watching porn of women ‘squirting’ on men. He’s incredibly turned on by the idea of it all and wants me to squirt on him. Are these videos even real? Is female ejaculation possible; and, if so, how could I make myself do it? 2) I’ve just separated from my husband and have been ostracized by my friends because I had an affair. We are the first in our group of friends to divorce and I think it’s made...

Nov 09, 202227 minSeason 3Ep. 9

S3 Ep. 8: Bent Penises, Sex Buddies, and Should You Stick Around if the Sex Spark Isn't There?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m 38 and have finally met a nice guy. I really like him, but the sex is average at best. We’ve only been seeing each other for two months and the sex is like the sex you have two years in. It’s okay, but the lust and spark isn’t there. Is this something you can fix? 2) My new boyfriend’s penis is bent, a bit like a banana. Is this anything to worry about? He doesn’t seem worried by it, and it’s not affecting his per...

Nov 02, 202222 minSeason 3Ep. 8

S3 Ep. 7: Open Relationships, The Myth of the Simultaneous Orgasm, and How Soon is Acceptable to Make a Move After a Break Up?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m a 36-year-old straight woman and just broke up with my ex. Something that always bothered my ex was that we didn’t have an orgasm at the same time. I learned to fake it to avoid him getting annoyed or upset if we didn’t ‘come together’ during intercourse, but I don’t want to do that anymore. All the men I’ve slept with seem to expect this will happen. I can’t be the only one not having simultaneous orgasms. How do...

Oct 26, 202226 minSeason 3Ep. 7

S3 Ep. 6: Sex Pests, Stocking Stuffers, and Sexual History

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m 36 and have been married for nine years. I’m sick to death of being pestered for sex by my husband. He wants sex all the time and gets angry or sulks when I don’t give in. I’ve tried telling him that being hassled makes me want sex less, not more, but he doesn’t listen. Our sex is okay, but it’s always about his pleasure. We have sex about four times a week which is more than enough for me. How can I stop him beha...

Oct 19, 202226 minSeason 3Ep. 6

S3 Ep. 5: Acting Out Sex Fantasies, Newly Discovered Old Affairs, and What to Do If You Never Get Wet

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m a woman in my early thirties and I don’t get wet either during masturbation or sex (but I do have orgasms easily). It has always been like that. I’ve tried lubes, creams, dietary supplements, even hormones, but nothing's changed. I’ve talked to different doctors and everything is fine medically with me. I didn’t talk to my boyfriend about my problem at the start because I feel so terribly ashamed about it. Instead...

Oct 12, 202228 minSeason 3Ep. 5

S3 Ep. 4: How Do I Know if My Partner is Still Watching Porn, Do 'Sex Dates' Work, and I Don't Trust Men After My Father's Affair

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) My partner of six years and I used to have really good sex but it’s dropped off considerably as time goes on. We used to be grabbing at each other all the time but that’s disappeared and now it’s all too easy to let other things take priority. Would planning a day when we do it help us get back on track or does it turn sex into a something you tick off the ‘to-do’ list? 2) I am certain my partner watches porn but he w...

Oct 05, 202228 minSeason 3Ep. 4

S3 Ep. 3: Does Cheating with Another Woman Count, Hints on How to Speed Up Sex, and Dealing with Daddy Issues

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I have been with my partner for 15 years – we got together at college. Our sex life is okay...ish, but I crave new experiences and I want to have them on my own. I have always wanted to sleep with another woman. I would never cheat on my partner with another man – that’s just wrong — but is sleeping with another woman so bad? I know a club where I could meet women and make this happen. I would make sure I was discrete...

Sep 28, 202228 minSeason 3Ep. 3

S3 Ep. 2: What's Normal Eight Years In, I'm Threatened by His Past, and Does Being Drunk Excuse Someone from Cheating?

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m a straight woman and very happy with my partner. All is good; but, four years in I still feel intimated by his sexual past. He’s a little older than me and has had many lovers. I have only slept with one person before him (I was in a long-term relationship for many years before we met). He’s never said anything to make me feel inferior, but I sometimes feel like a dancing monkey trying to wow the crowd. I still wo...

Sep 21, 202226 minSeason 3Ep. 2

S3 Ep. 1: To Vab or Not to Vab, Baby Speak, and How to Give a Great Hand Job

In this episode, Tracey and Kelsey discuss these three anonymous questions: 1) What’s your view on ‘vabbing’? Does it really work to attract men? Can people tell what it is they’re smelling and wouldn’t they be put off if they do figure it out? 2) I’m a 44-year-old attractive, fit woman but have never really been in a proper relationship and because of this I lack experience in the bedroom. I can honestly say I don’t know how to give basic things like a hand job and this is stopping me from dati...

Sep 14, 202228 minSeason 3Ep. 1

S2 Ep. 17: Erections that Come and Go, Tricks for Having Great Sex Long-Distance, and How to Get Back on the Horse after Years of Being Single

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) I’ve just started a new relationship with a guy I’m really into. Our sex is good and he seems to enjoy it but his erections are a little hit and miss. On two occasions, he struggled to get one and I notice he loses his erection when he goes down on me. Does that mean he’s not enjoying doing it? Do you think it means he’s not that into me sexually or he doesn’t find me attractive? We’re both in our 20s so shouldn’t his erection b...

May 03, 202230 minSeason 2Ep. 17

S2 Ep. 16: My Husband Only Wants Anal Sex, My partner Was a Virgin, and Is It The Kiss of Death if We Sleep in Separate Beds?

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) When my husband and I met in our early 40’s, we had a lot of sex that was fairly vanilla but very passionate. Over time, the frequency has decreased. I don’t like being the initiator so there’s not been much I can do to have sex more other than be incredibly enthusiastic when he does want it. The problem is that, over time, he’s become more interested in anal sex than vaginal sex. Having things put in my butt does not arouse me ...

Apr 26, 202225 minSeason 2Ep. 16

S2 Ep. 15: Sex with a Much Older Man, Nipple-Biting, and Why has a Death Made Me Horny?

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m a 35-year-old woman who has fallen in love with a much older man: he’s 60. At the moment, the age difference isn’t that apparent because he looks and acts much younger than his years. But I am worried about sex because it’s a big part of our relationship. How long can a man keep getting erections? Is there an age when he will stop wanting to have sex with me? 2) I’ve been with my wife for 25 years, and recently she asked me ...

Apr 19, 202228 minSeason 2Ep. 15

S2 Ep. 14: Cross-Dressing, Jealous Rages, and How to Make Sex Work When You’re Different Heights

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) I am a happily married man who likes wearing women’s underwear under my clothes. I buy the items secretly and my wife has no idea I do this: it’s remarkably easy to get away with if you think things through. I’ve been doing this from when I was very small and never told anyone about it in my life. It doesn’t interfere with my relationships but I would dearly love not to have to hide it and to share this indulgence with my wife. ...

Apr 12, 202233 minSeason 2Ep. 14

S2 Ep. 13: Sex Giggles, Sex Dreams, and How to Tell if Your Boyfriend is Secretly Gay

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) Sometimes when I’m in bed with my husband, I start laughing. He gets all huffy about it which makes me laugh even more. I have no idea why I do it or how to stop. 2) I’m very happy with my partner of 12 years but I dream of sex with other men nearly every night. I love the dreams: they’re exciting and fun though I do feel guilty when I wake up. I sometimes wonder if this means I’d be up for cheating if someone made a move on me....

Apr 05, 202221 minSeason 2Ep. 13

S2 Ep. 12: My Partner Won't Listen to What I Want in Bed, my Boyfriend's Still on Tinder, and Is There Really Such a Thing as an Aphrodisiac?

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) Is there such a thing as an aphrodisiac? Oysters, chocolate, things like that? I suspect the answer is no but I’m curious if things like ‘Spanish Fly’ ever did work? 2) I have no problems asking for what I want in bed but I feel like I’m talking to myself with my new partner. It’s not easy for me to orgasm because I need very specific stimulation. (I’m a gay man, by the way, so it’s not true that all men can orgasm without issue...

Mar 29, 202223 minSeason 2Ep. 12

S2 Ep. 11: I Don't Like How My Vulva Looks, My Friends Can't Forgive His Affair, and How to Use a Butt Plug

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m embarrassed about the way my vulva looks. My inner labia lips protrude and look ugly. I’ve watched porn and, for most women, the inner lips sit inside the outer lips. It makes me very nervous about sex with someone new. Is this normal? 2) A year ago, my partner had an affair. We have a close group of friends, so everyone knows about it. But we’ve worked things out, I’ve forgiven him and we are back on track. The problem is o...

Mar 22, 202220 minSeason 2Ep. 11

S2 Ep. 10: Working from Home Porn Addiction, Crushes on Other Men, and What to Do When You’re Married but Haven’t Had Sex in Years

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) I’m no prude and have nothing against people watching porn but I am alarmed by the amount of time my boyfriend now spends watching it on his phone. We both work from home and it’s ramped up since then. He thinks it’s funny when I catch him and doesn’t try to hide it. But it’s starting to bug me, looking over and seeing women doing degrading things to men for hours each day. Am I over-reacting? 2) I’m happily married but have a c...

Mar 15, 202224 minSeason 2Ep. 10

S2 Ep. 9: Intercourse Orgasms, Should You Confess an Affair You Got Away With, and How to Talk Yourself into Wanting Sex

In this episode, Tracey answers these three anonymous questions: 1) I can’t climax during intercourse and it frustrates me. I know I’m not the only one and I know why I’m not able to orgasm but surely there are things I can try other than him using his fingers or holding a vibrator there? 2) My 8-year relationship went through a bad patch and I had a brief fling with a woman at work. It’s all over, no one ever found out, and my relationship is back on track. It happened six months ago but I stil...

Mar 08, 202221 minSeason 2Ep. 9
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