When things aren't ideal in a relationship it's normal to wonder, "should I try to make this work, or move on and look for something better?" Jeff had this question some months ago at a critical point in his relationship. In this episode he shares his experience in finding clarity and peace and happiness in his relationship life. Jeff is a friend and former client. Brought to you by KUDRA: herbal adaptogen, nootropic, SuperFood. Now offering free shipping in the US. www.drinkkudra.com Advertisin...
Nov 04, 2021•40 min
It's one thing to be confident and secure when everything is going your way. But if you're challenging yourself that won't always be the case. "How do you win the Inner Game when your Outer Game has yet to catch up?" Miiska Van Renterghem is a coach and former client. We discuss his question along with masculine responsibility, self worth, and some other topics. Brought to you by KUDRA-- An adaptogen tea that improves your body's response to stress, lowering cortisol, and improving focus. Get 10...
Oct 28, 2021•1 hr 1 min
"Peace is hard earned." Patrick is a friend and former client. We speak about my recent Dark Night of the Soul, fatherhood, Socrates, and how language creates reality. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe
Oct 21, 2021•1 hr 6 min
The Dark Night of the Soul is a stage in the individuation process where one gets the opportunity to re-align with the unconscious. It's often associated with "feeling down" but is not the same thing. This episode hits on the "Dilemma of Honor", Kiekegaard's Knights of Faith and Infinite Resignation, Carl Jung's Red Book, and how to transform through your Dark Night process. 'Sponsored' by KUDRA, an adaptogen beverage that can lower your cortisol, mitigate caffeine, and help you enter the Presen...
Oct 14, 2021•1 hr 42 min
Polarity and harmony tend to be at odds in relationships — Obviously, the more different you and your partner are, the more likely there will be misunderstandings. But does that mean a polarized relationship needs to be a chaotic one? Absolutely not. Here's how to ensure harmony while maintaining polarity in your relationship. #relationshippolarity #unifyyourhousehold #mastermorality Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/s...
Aug 05, 2021•18 min
'Inner Game' is often synonymized with confidence, but its original usage refers to a game you can play... and win. And winning the inner game is the key to dropping shame, welcoming peak performance, and perhaps even existential fulfillment. #virtueofcuriosity #howtowintheinnergame #increaseenthusiasm Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Jul 29, 2021•32 min
Last week I spoke about why I've stopped using "vulnerability"... and why being truthful is a prerequisite for control of your reality. But if you have a history of "low fidelity" (anything from compulsive lying to being vague), becoming more truthful is easier said than done. >> Join a circle of high fidelity men at MasculineUnderground.com/mastermind #howtogetgoodattellingthetruth #highfidelityreality #howtobeanhonorableman Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full acc...
Jul 22, 2021•18 min
"Goodness is something to be chosen. When a man cannot choose he ceases to be a man." (Anthony Burgess, A Clockwork Orange) Noelfry and I discuss Master vs. Slave consciousness in both society and in one's personal life. We cover the foundational actions of "owning your reality'. I reference some fictional examples from the Lion King, A Clockwork Orange, and Shantaram. Want to discuss philosophy with me and other smart dudes? Check out >>> the Masculine Underground {mastermind} group #b...
Jul 20, 2021•54 min
"Vulnerability" is one of the most misused and misunderstood terms. Here's why I've stopped using it, and what I use instead. #highfidelityreality #shouldmenbevulnerable #howtobegoodattellingthetruth Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe
Jul 15, 2021•19 min
"A man's beauty represents inner functional truths: his face shows what he can do." (Albert Camus) Trauma (inhibitions to normal function) shows up in out nonverbal communication— facial expressions and posture. We can read one's emotions through their resting faces and micro-expressions. Here's how to read, and modify yours from trauma to ease and confidence. >>> Join the Men's Group/Book Club #bodylanguageandtraumarelease #doestraumashow #nonverbalcommunication Advertising Inquiries: ...
Jul 01, 2021•1 hr 4 min
Inevitably in a relationship there will be a point of tension where one partner wants to pull away when the other wants to keep connecting. In a SECURE male-female relationship, that usually means the man is the one pulling away. I'll share why this has to be the man's role, and why in a secure relationship it's actually a gift you give your woman. Check out the Masculine Underground Men's Group & Book Club #attachmenttheorybecomemoresecure #whatdoesitmeantowearthepantsintherelationship #wha...
Jun 29, 2021•11 min
The Fool Archetype is the aspect of the psyche that takes nothing seriously, welcomes uncertainty, and always finds a way to break into laughter... In mythology it's seen in the Trickster God. In psychology it's sometimes labeled as the "Inner Child." But it's much more than that... The Fool sees the "deeper reality" beneath appearances. And that in itself can change your life... #isthisreallifeisthisjustfantasy #howtonottakethingstooseriously #foolarchetypepsychology Advertising Inquiries: http...
Jun 24, 2021•1 hr 23 min
A lot of guys dissociate from their romantic side. So it ends up coming out in cringey ways. The best lessons on integrating this come from the Greek myth of Orpheus... Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe
Jun 22, 2021•22 min
The man making the woman laugh is a critical part of the human mating ritual. This episode breaks down why, along with some principles that allow her to laugh more— No promises that it will make you actually funny ;) Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Jun 17, 2021•23 min
"All the taboo stuff comes out on your podcast" - Tim. Tim is a former client whom I recently demoted to friend. (His joke, not mine.) He shares some vulnerable things related to OCD/getting stuck in thought loops, particularly with women in relationships. We also hit on the problems with pathologies, why cortisol isn't a bad thing, and what makes relationships work. We also hit on all the taboo topics, obviously. #getoutofyourhead #masculineselflove #iscortisolgoodorbad Advertising Inquiries: h...
Jun 15, 2021•1 hr 22 min
Toughness is the ability to endure and thrive in stressful conditions. We often think of 'Toughness' as a purely mental ability. But it can actually be measured. AND toughness can be trained. This episode I'll share some key points from the book The Hour Between Wolf and Dog (John Coates) on how you can physically condition your body to be better at handling mental and emotional stress. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.co...
Jun 10, 2021•1 hr 5 min
Many guys fear intimacy because when they fall in love they lose their masculinity. Hormonally, love increases oxytocin which has some opposite effects to testosterone. However there is a way to avoid going soft in relationships. And actually romantic relationships can make you more of a man... if you do it right. #dontloseyourselfinarelationship #stayhard #loverarchetypefeminine Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subsc...
Jun 08, 2021•26 min
Nietzche's concept of Nobility is a set of traits that have one have a greater control of his reality. In this episode we break down the Master and Slave archetypes that are within us all, how they play out in society, and how to actively enable your own inner nobility. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Jun 03, 2021•1 hr 28 min
"Getting off on every stroke" is a skill of turning unpleasant experiences into enjoyable ones. On the one hand it's a nice metaphor for alchemizing suffering. On the other hand it's a literal physical skill. Carolyn Elliott described it in her book Existential Kink and discussed in our 2020 interview. Some people asked if I could break it down, so here it is. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
May 27, 2021•57 min
According to Jung, an intimate relationship actually involves four entities: The man's masculine and feminine sides, and the woman's masculine and feminine sides. How these archetypes interact determines the polarity and therefore healthy intimacy of the relationship. In modern relationships, a battle often ensues between the masculine sides— This is often unintentional, but is often the cause of low polarity and lost attraction in relationships. If you want a healthy polar relationship, then it...
May 25, 2021•1 hr 1 min
"There is no female Mozart because there is no female Jack the Ripper." (Camille Paglia) Obsession is a male tendency. It's why boys are more likely than girls to addicted to video games or adult content. It also relates to why young men take stupid risks. And why you really only see male stalkers. But this tendency can also be one of the greatest virtues. All the great men of history have been obsessed with something. When obsessed, a person naturally pushes through discomfort and generates the...
May 20, 2021•1 hr 4 min
"Target Panic" is an experience archers sometimes get when they lose the ability aim properly. My buddy Andy brought it up as an excellent metaphor for the experience many of us have when we get attached to an outcome. Andy is a bowhunter, former cowboy, and has been a client. We speak about Zen and methods of retraining the mind and emotions. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
May 18, 2021•56 min
Last weekend a friend and I did a David Goggins-inspired challenge: 4km every 4 hrs for 48hrs. During it we had a lot of philosophical discussion and created personal morality. This episode shows the other side of "Breaking Social Constructions of Reality" episode-- MAKING personal reality. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
May 11, 2021•54 min
In this episode we talk about different perspectives on realities (subjective vs. objective reality), how we build our own reality, who sets the norms of "normal" vs. "not normal". We talk about the effect of social media, the effect of resentment on one's life, how important forgiveness is and how forgiving means taking responsibility for your own actions. Living in an abundant reality supposes having responsibility for your own choices. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get f...
May 04, 2021•51 min
Regret is a type of shame-- One of the worst kinds since it allows the past to continually F up your present. This episode covers some of my recent experiences confronting these very old feelings. The two types of regret Why sometimes your actions SEEM outside of your control How to retrain your autopilot Deleting victimhood Psycho-Cybernetics Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Apr 29, 2021•1 hr 4 min
Actual abundance with women doesn't come from learning a bunch of social tricks. It comes down to who you are. Here I boil down what makes a man attractive to women in two simple but universally true principles. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Apr 22, 2021•1 hr 14 min
The 'Dark Masculine' is the set of testosterone-driven traits that have been evolutionarily beneficial, but not accepted by modern society. (Hence they are "dark".) The first Dark Masculine episode (from last summer) focused on healing shame. But how do you embody these characteristics for fun and profit? Enter: The Beast This episode speaks on channeling that animalistic part of you that conquers, takes, pillages, (and has people love him for it). We dive deep into some social taboos. Be warned...
Apr 13, 2021•1 hr 17 min
Q&A episode on the Lover Archetype, Dark Feminine, and Culture. Featuring Noelfry. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe
Apr 09, 2021•47 min
The Magician Archetype is the part of the psyche responsible for creativity, making meaning, and spirituality. It's the part of you that "writes" your life story. This episode covers: Understanding "magic" and the creative process Removing blocks to "becoming the Magician" Opening the floodgates I reference some mystical/occultist models. You can take them as a metaphor for creativity, or more literally if you choose... #kingwarriormagicianlover #archetypes #jung #crowley #magick Advertising Inq...
Mar 30, 2021•1 hr 38 min
Last week I coached a listener of the podcast on integrating the Dark Masculine archetype— I invited him on the podcast to share his experience with overcoming shame and fear of rejection in intimacy. We also discuss what do when your needs seem to conflict with your woman's needs, and how to respond to a woman's past traumas. Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands Get full access to Ruwando Substack at ruwando.substack.com/subscribe...
Mar 25, 2021•1 hr 5 min
