One Shot Patreon Drive!
The One Shot Network Patreon Drive is going on NOW!
Jun 28, 2025•4 min
Roleplay Retcon
Roleplay Retcon remakes the movies that let you down using tabletop roleplaying games (TTRPGS), soundtracks by indie bands, and lots of goofy writers' room jokes. Professional writer Benjamin Gray, Theatre sensei Jensie, and RPG expert/comedian/cinephile Alex invite a new guest, feature a new band, and play a new roleplaying or storytelling game for each bad movie.
Last refreshed: ⓘ
Follow this podcast in the Metacast mobile app to refresh it and see new episodes.
Podcasts are better in Metacast mobile app
Don't just listen to podcasts. Learn from them with transcripts, summaries, and chapters for every episode. Skim, search, and bookmark insights. Learn more
Episodes
Pacific Rim Uprising (2018), Ep. 3: Kaiju? Gesundheit | Roleplay Retcon
Now that Amara has learned the ropes in her new Jaeger, it's time for a combat exercise against Jake's three simulated Kaiju. It's also a good way to get to know her new squadmates, who don't have any personal problems at all. Content Warnings: Violence, gore Guest GMed by Henn, a.k.a. @iwriterobots! Soundtrack by BE/HOLD! We're playing Lancer! Our Patreon has bonus content! ...
Jun 18, 2025•52 min
Pacific Rim Uprising (2018), Ep. 2: Jaeger? I barely know'er | Roleplay Retcon
Amara and Jake are in hot water with the Pan Pacific Defense Council, but Jake's surprising connection offers them a job in exchange for freedom: Help revive the dying Jaeger pilot training program. Content Warnings: Profanity, heavy weapons, family trauma Guest GMed by Henn, a.k.a. @iwriterobots! Soundtrack by BE/HOLD! We're playing Lancer! Our Patreon has bonus content! Our ...
Jun 04, 2025•58 min
Pacific Rim Uprising (2018), Ep. 1: What's Amara with You? | Roleplay Retcon
The Kaiju attacks ended long ago. Now, scavengers pick through the ruins of Los Angeles to find Jaeger parts, either to re-sell on the black market or for making homebrew machines of their own. Both mech wunderkind Amara Namani and Jake Pentecost, son of fallen Kaiju conflict hero Stacker Pentecost, have infiltrated a Jaeger graveyard to find a valuable power core. Who's gonna get it first? Content warnings: Violence, death, guns, teen peril Guest GMed by Henn, a.k.a. @iwriterobots! Soundtrack...
Jun 04, 2025•1 hr 3 min
Pacific Rim: Uprising (2018): Lancer Rookie Camp | Roleplay Retcon
We're taking you back to Crunchytown with the Mech TTRPG Lancer, which we'll use to remake Pacific Rim: Uprising, the disappointing 2018 sequel to Pacific Rim. Though very fun and satisfying, Lancer is a little complicated, so we brought in Lancer and known robot kisser Henn to GM this series! Guest GMed by Henn, a.k.a. @iwriterobots! Soundtrack by BE/HOLD! We're playing Lancer! Our Patreon has bonus content! ...
May 07, 2025•1 hr 1 min
Cocktail (1988): Finale (with Superdillin) | Roleplay Retcon
In the finale of our remake of Cocktail (1988), some of the employees are chased by their pasts and some are agonizing about the present. Is a future of love and happiness even possible? Some say The Newest House knows... Can you guess who likes who before we do? Content Warnings: Sexual content Starring Superdillin from the One Shot Podcast, Patchwork Productions, and more! Soundtrack by Daniel Boxx! We're playing With a Twist of Fate, based on Spin the Bottle by Superdillin! ...
Apr 23, 2025•1 hr 16 min
Cocktail (1988) with Superdillin, Part 1 | Roleplay Retcon
We're remaking Cocktail (1988), an early entry in Tom Cruise's career that's bad in a funny way, but could still use a little jazz(?)ing up. We're playing an original game based on our guest Superdillin's Spin the Bottle, which uses the classic party game as a resolution mechanic. The Newest House restaurant and bar in New York City has a reputation for having a heart of its own and being a magical matchmaker for the people who work there. But that's just a fun local superstition... right? Conte...
Apr 16, 2025•1 hr 1 min
The Longest Yard (2005): Rehash | Roleplay Retcon
We're rubbing ointment on our tired muscles as we recap the victories and losses of our season, how they stack up to the original movie, and what we thought of Play Ball!, the game we powered our remake with. Stick around to the end to find out what's next! Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bonus content! ...
Apr 09, 2025•1 hr 24 min
The Longest Yard (2005): Finale | Roleplay Retcon
The prisoners are ahead going into the second half, but the warden has dirty tricks yet pulled, Portman is still sabotaging the team for a taste of Maple Syrup and a pardon, Cornflake is butting heads with him, and Bocepherous's demoralization has left the defense in shambles... Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence, allusions to substance abuse Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! ...
Apr 02, 2025•1 hr 5 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 9: Playing Hurt | Roleplay Retcon
As the game thunders on, Cornflake's and Portman's selfish agendas clash, and even Bocepherous's pure heart may not be enough to fix things. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bonus content! Our Discord has bonus people!...
Mar 20, 2025•49 min
Madame Web (2024) with FLOPS (featuring Kendo Smith) | Roleplay Retcon
We're taking a quick break from The Longest Yard with the audio from a livestreamed game of FLOPS, the TTRPG we're currently Kickstarter-ing! We remade last year's Madame Web, which may be the most unintentionally funny of the Spiderman-Minus-Spiderman Cinematic Universe movies. Kendo Smith from our Pluto Nash series joins us! Content warnings: Violence, death, spiders Back our new game FLOPS on Kickstarter! Starring Kendo from Tales Yet Told! Our Patreon has bonu...
Mar 12, 2025•4 hr 19 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 8: Today is Football | Roleplay Retcon
It's finally the day of the Big Game, and the bonds that bind these baller boys begin to bend. Bocepherous runs it in. Portman phones it in. Cornflake digs it in. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence Back our new game FLOPS on Kickstarter! Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bonus content! Our...
Feb 26, 2025•57 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep.7: An Intrigue of Their Own | Roleplay Retcon
Cornflake's shady past is now public knowledge and his social stock has plummeted. To get back on the team's good side and convince Portman that he's in mortal danger, he resolves to get proof of the Warden's dark plans from his office. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence Back our new game FLOPS on Kickstarter! Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bon...
Feb 13, 2025•50 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 6: The Longest Yarn | Roleplay Retcon
Everything's going great! Pizza party! Bocepherous nails an interception. Cornflake calls a timeout. Portman plays defense. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bonus content! Our Discord has bonus people! We're part of...
Jan 29, 2025•48 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 5: Bone Down for What | Roleplay Retcon
The team has its first practice, and one thing becomes clear to Coach Burt: They're gonna have to cheat. Bocepherous finds a moral loophole. Cornflake meets the prison's biggest shipper. Portman gives a disjointed speech. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, sexual content Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bonus content!...
Jan 15, 2025•1 hr 16 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 4: I Did Not Shoot the Burger Prince | Roleplay Retcon
It's up to Cornflake to find his way into solitary confinement and recruit their safety-- the mysterious Peter Pistol, who has a troubled past and a troubled heart. Portman tags along for the first phase of the plan, but he has his own idea of how it should shake out... Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, sexual content, gun violence, lyrics alluding to suicide Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield!...
Jan 01, 2025•47 min
Red One (2024) with The Fight Before Christmas | Roleplay Retcon
Red One is the first movie we've remade while the original is still in theaters, but its wasted Metal Gear Solid meets Santa premise and $100 million loss at the box office begged us to do it ASAP. We're remaking it with The Fight Before Christmas, a hack of Lasers and Feelings that has players creating operatives with a vendetta against Santa. Saint Nick has gone on a rampage, destroying every toy factory and toy store in the world, and elite team YULECAT has been assembled. Now Santa's persona...
Dec 21, 2024•1 hr 41 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 3: Hoops, There It Is | Roleplay Retcon
Burt Reynolds proclaims himself the prison team's coach with some pushback, but not enough to matter. The boys make trips to the basketball court, the library, and the labor yard to recruit more players to the team. Portman takes the rule of threes too far. Bocepherous finds someone with a weirder name than his. Cornflake cannot make sense of this. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence, blood, sexual references Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Dam...
Dec 18, 2024•53 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 2: Gruel Intentions | Roleplay Retcon
The boys split up to begin building the team. Cornflake finds some art supplies. Bocepherous gets a dose of reality. Portman has a memorable meal. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence Starring guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday! Soundtrack by Them Damn Dogs! We're playing Play Ball! by Roe Caufield! Our Patreon has bonus content! Our Discord has bonus people!...
Dec 04, 2024•1 hr 21 min
The Longest Yard (2005), Ep. 1: Maple Attraction | Roleplay Retcon
Former NFL quarterback and maple syrup kingpin Portman Tow, Mama's boy Bocepherous Nut, and professional grifter Cornflake Cogburn all find themselves in the wrong seat of a squad car. At their new prison home, Warden Sanders promises a reduced sentence for Portman if he puts together a football team of prisoners to give his guards' team something to practice tackling. But not everyone wants Portman to put the team together... Content Warnings: Profanity, prison, violence Starring guest GM Grant...
Nov 20, 2024•1 hr 15 min
The Longest Yard (2005): Rookie Camp with Grant Nordine and Play Ball!
Rookie Camp episodes are our cute name for "episode zero" where we introduce the game we're playing (Play Ball! by Roe Caufield) and our first-ever guest GM Grant Nordine of Game Master Monday. And the name is finally apt because we're remaking the 2005 Adam Sandler remake of The Longest Yard, which had a poor critical reception, but that didn't stop millions of people from being bamboozled by Sandler at the height of his powers. Content Warnings: Profanity, prison Starring guest GM Grant Nordin...
Nov 06, 2024•33 min
Game Master Monday Feed Drop
Before we get started with our remake of a remake of The Longest Yard, get to know our first-ever guest GM: Grant Nordine, the co-creator, co-host, and often titular game master of the podcast Game Master Monday. Each episode of Game Master Monday is standalone and has a new game and a new cast, and Roleplay Retcon has been on the show more than once! Don't worry, this won't affect our release schedule. We'll drop Rookie Camp in a week!
Oct 30, 2024•2 hr 6 min
Superman IV (1987) with Jeff Stormer, Finale | Roleplay Retcon
In the back half of our remake of Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, Superman doesn't let his humiliation at the hands of Nuclear Man stop him from dismantling the world's nukes. Will Nuclear man retaliate, or will he be distracted by Lois Lane? I guess the answer seems obvious, but the date gets pretty hot. Content Warnings: War, nuclear weapons, mild violence, profanity Starring Jeff Stormer! Soundtrack by Phillip Mount! The game we're playing was built using The Goblin Pulls Out a Gun...
Oct 23, 2024•1 hr 4 min
Superman IV (1987) with Jeff Stormer, Part 1 | Roleplay Retcon
Jeff Stormer, Superman superfan and the host of Party of One, made a bespoke game specifically for remaking Superman IV: The Quest for Peace, the final Christopher Reeve Superman movie that put Supes in Hollywood timeout for 20 years. Content Warnings: War, nuclear weapons, mild violence, profanity Starring Jeff Stormer! Soundtrack by Phillip Mount! The game we're playing was built using The Goblin Pulls Out a Gun by Viditya Voleti! We're part of the One Shot Network! Consider joining t...
Oct 09, 2024•1 hr 11 min
An American Werewolf in Paris (1997) with Gamewoven
An American Werewolf in London (1981) is one of the all-time great horror comedies. And then 16 years later somebody decided to make a spiritual sequel, An American Werewolf in Paris, and inject it with all of the worst tropes of the '90s. We remake the latter with Craig Campbell's Die Laughing, a GM-less TTRPG about making comedy horror movies! We can't promise it's a cohesive story, but we can promise some much more interesting characters and that nobody says "sex points." Content Warnings: Vi...
Sep 25, 2024•1 hr 17 min
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003): Rehash | Roleplay Retcon
Time is as it should be and the League heads off on their next adventure. We're gonna stay here and talk about this one, though. Did we improve on the original movie? Find out what we think in this episode! Featuring Ryan and Laurel from Flash Fantasy: Rift Walkers! Soundtrack by composer Robert Russell! We're playing Savage Worlds Adventure Edition! Our Patreon has bonus content!...
Sep 20, 2024•59 min
The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen (2003): Finale | Roleplay Retcon
The League and Carmen Sandiego have their final showdown. Not everyone will survive. Holtzmann does what she does best. Marty lifts a gag order. Laszlo puts on the rizz. Dom steals half a truck. Content Warnings: Death, violence, Nazis, blood, profanity, sexual content Featuring Ryan and Laurel from Flash Fantasy: Rift Walkers! Soundtrack by composer Robert Russell! We're playing Savage Worlds Adventure Edition! Our Patreon ...
Sep 19, 2024•1 hr 17 min
LXG (2003), Ep. 7: The League of Exhausting Gentlemen | Roleplay Retcon
The League hatches a plan to track down and stop Carmen Sandiego and finally use those time circuits on the Rogue One. Dom gets aided and banded. Marty is not a sniper. Holtzmann is a girl's girl. Laszlo dons the greatest disguise of all time. Content Warnings: Death, body horror, Nazis, blood, profanity, sexual content Featuring Ryan and Laurel from Flash Fantasy: Rift Walkers! Soundtrack by composer Robert Russell! We're playing Savage Worlds Adventure...
Aug 28, 2024•54 min
LXG (2003), Ep. 6: The League of Squishy Gentlemen | Roleplay Retcon
Borat's ferocious bear may be the end of Dom. Holtzmann's driving may be the end of everyone else. Marty wants to put a pin in this self-reflective moment. Laszlo sees someone he knows. Content Warnings: Profanity, death, violence, gore, blood, sexual innuendo, violence against animals Featuring Ryan and Laurel from Flash Fantasy: Rift Walkers! Soundtrack by composer Robert Russell! We're playing Savage Worlds Adventure Edition! Our Patreon has ...
Aug 14, 2024•56 min
LXG (2003), Ep. 5: The League of Satirical Identical Gentlemen | Roleplay Retcon
The Cohen Coercion attacks! Dom finally gets behind the wheel as the rest of the League fights off four vehicles with very similar-looking drivers. Holtzmann upgrades her seat. Marty downgrades a tire. Dom snubs someone. Laszlo does some necking. Content Warnings: Profanity, death, violence, gore, blood, sexual innuendo, violence against animals • Featuring Ryan and Laurel from Flash Fantasy: Rift Walkers! Soundtrack by composer Robert Russell! We're playing Savage World...
Jul 31, 2024•53 min
Hosted on Megaphone by Spotify
For the best experience, listen in Metacast app for iOS or Android