Magic Moments: Finding Time for the Self-Care You Need

Corean Canty (00:01.23)
Hello, hello, my friends. Welcome back to the Remember to Live podcast. I hope you're able to grab a warm drink and get cozy. Today I am drinking some freshly ground coffee and some homemade almond milk with just a little bit of cinnamon to spice it up a bit. It's cold and rainy here in Atlanta and it's February. I looked up and January was gone. And the last week of January was

hard. There was a lot of caretaking duties that increased. Mom got sick. She had some procedures. It took over a lot of my life. And I also had to travel for work, doing something that I love, able to go see one of my favorite clients and do a play workshop. It's become an annual thing. And I love that. But I realized when I got back and the exhaustion took over

that I have not been taking the time that I know I need to refill my cup, to recharge, and be able to continue pouring. So I wanted to take a little bit of time today to talk about how we can make sure we have the time that we need for the self-care that's going to allow us to do all the things that we want to do in life.

Now I have this thing that I focus on with my clients who are constantly saying, I'm too busy. I don't have time. I know what I need to do. I know I need to rest. I know I need to meditate. I know I need to eat right. I know I need to take a walk. I know I need to move my body. I know what I need to do for myself, but everything else takes over my time. I found that there are two times in your day

that you have absolute control over what you do, and you can absolutely make time to not only fill your cup first, but also release anything that's not yours so that you can recharge and get the rest that you need.

Corean Canty (02:20.746)
And those two times are the moments when you first wake up, when you first open your eyes in the morning and the moments right before you go to sleep, right before you close your eyes. Those are the magic moments. And when you're feeling like I just can't find a way to fit in any self care, let's start there. No matter what your life is like.

Whether you wake up in the morning and you have little ones at home demanding your attention, or you have pets that are demanding your attention, or you're the person who reaches over to your phone and your boss has already sent three or four emails and you feel that urgency to get up and start working. No matter what is going on, you can give yourself five minutes. You can give yourself five minutes before you look at the phone and invite in everybody else's needs.

in all of the distractions of the world to check in, give yourself some love, give yourself some care and start your day in peace instead of chaos. Now the clients that I work with when I'm coaching, when they feel like even five minutes feels like too much, I have them start with just taking a few deep breaths. When you wake up in the morning and you first open your eyes instead of

reaching for the phone and instantly looking at whatever notifications you have. Take a moment and feel in your body. Do a quick scan. Am I already feeling tension before my feet even hit the floor? Where am I feeling it? Let me take some deep breaths and breathe into the places that I feel tension so that I can release it. If I do nothing else today, let me start my day by giving myself these few moments to fill my cup.

And then you expand from there. It can be beautiful. Giving yourself time to just take care of you before you take care of anything else. Now I've built up my morning rituals. Some people call it morning routine. I prefer to think of them as rituals because I don't necessarily have a rigid routine. I started out small, just giving myself a few minutes to breathe and feel in my body.

Corean Canty (04:45.462)
And I've built it up to giving myself a full hour, at least in the morning. I like to wake up slowly, ease into the day. We never know what the day is going to bring. Some days will be filled with unexpected things that totally mess up everything you had planned. Some days will feel a little bit easier, but every day you can start it out in a way that fills your cup first and prepares you for whatever is going to happen.

I like to wake up in the morning, ease out of bed, pull my cards, journal a little bit. I may meditate, I may breathe, I may do yoga, but I like to do something that allows me to get in touch with myself, allows me to move my body, and allows me to spend some time without a device. Even if it's two minutes, I just need some time with myself before I give to anyone else.

And the second time of the day that we can control is what happens right before we close our eyes. Now, I would love for everyone to build a beautiful, wind down evening routine, ritual, whatever works for you to really prepare yourself to sleep. But that isn't necessarily a reality for everyone. Again, we all can find five minutes to...

Turn off the TV, put the phone away, check in with our body, check in with our mind, what thoughts are racing, what is happening that is going to keep me up all night, and how can I give myself a few steps before I go to sleep to allow me to release?

to allow me to release what no longer serves me, what's not mine, what I don't need to take into rest so that I can get quality rest and recharge and be able to have a great morning. And one of the best ways to do that is using your breath. The breath that I love to do before going to sleep is one where the exhale is double the amount of time as the inhale.

Corean Canty (07:08.906)
Now taking this type of breath actually helps to activate our parasympathetic nervous system, which is the system where we can relax, where we can unwind, where we're letting go of the stress. Throughout the day, we can activate our sympathetic nervous system, our fight and flight, our stress, all of the little things that ping that system all day. And we can get stuck there. So taking these types of breaths can help to

Let that go and turn on the system that's going to help us rest. And what that breath looks like is inhaling for the count of four, making sure that when you inhale your belly is expanding and exhaling for the count of eight, making sure when you exhale that your belly is pulling in and you're actually getting all of that air out.

Even just taking three of these breaths makes a difference. But starting to build a morning and evening breathing routine, just to start, will make a difference in your self care. And as you get used to that, adding on things like reading a page of a book that you've really been wanting to read just for fun, just a page, being able to

Maybe turn on a song that puts you in a nice, relaxed mood, makes you feel good, helps you to release whatever you don't need. Whether it's just spending time having some conversation with your kids or your partner, or even your pet that may like to cuddle up with you in the evening. And if you find yourself constantly thinking about what you didn't get done or what you need to do the next day.

I recommend keeping a journal next to your bed and this jotting it down, dumping it out, releasing it so you don't have to worry about it. And as you get used to this practice, adding on a ritual of celebrating the wins from the day. Our mind is really good at thinking about all the things that went wrong or we wish we could change, but finding one thing that went right every day. And just keeping a record of it.

Corean Canty (09:33.566)
So you have all of the wins at the end of the week that happen no matter what else you might've faced. And writing down one thing that you're grateful for really helps to set the tone to rest well.

And then during these magic moments, begin expanding and trying new things that fill your cup. The point is, can you do one thing every morning when you wake up before you serve everyone else that brings you joy? One thing that's just for you, whether it's sitting quietly sipping your favorite warm drink, whether it's taking a quick walk and getting some sun on your face, whether it's...

watering your plants, reading a book, whatever it is, whatever that hobby is that you might have been putting off, just take a couple minutes and fill your cup first. And before you lay down and close your eyes, give yourself a couple minutes to release, give yourself what you need to rest well and take care of yourself because you deserve it.

We all deserve time in our day to give ourselves what we need so that we can do the great work and be in service in the way that we want to with everyone that we love in our jobs and in the world.

So hopefully this quick episode has given you a few ideas on how to fit that self care in when you feel like you just don't have time. Tap into the magic moments. Five minutes when you wake up and five minutes before you go to sleep. You can at least give yourself that every day. And on the days that you can go longer, give yourself as much time as you can. Life is short.

Corean Canty (11:33.41)
We need to take care of ourselves while we're here so we can really enjoy it. Until next time, my friends, remember to live.