In this episode we explore toxic masculinity and male sexuality. It all starts how we raise our sons. Check it out. SHOWNOTES: (0:15) Intro / Recap from last episodes (2:40) Why talk about toxic masculinity (5:00) #MeToo movement (8:28) Why men live in fear of being acused of toxic behaviors (10:10) Why closed and disconnected men display toxic behavior (12:33) What happens when we don’t teach our boys about sexuality (17:11) Understanding the factors that cause toxic behaviors...
Apr 23, 2019•21 min
In this episode I explain how society and culture play an massive role in the indoctrination of men from a young age, which keeps their hearts behind a giant wall. From a young age, boys learn to repress and hide their emotions and their sensitive side in order to belong to the peer group, their family, and avoid rejection and abandonment.
Apr 16, 2019•34 min
Apr 12, 2019•24 min
Few experts have studied more marriages - and determined what makes those relationships succeed or fall apart - than Drs. John and Julie Gottman. The Seattle-based couple and founders of the Gottman Institute are leaders in their field, using decades of case studies to help both new couples and long-term partners communicate, ask the right questions, and find the solutions to keep their relationships intact and running smoothly. On this episode of the Smart Couple Podcast, the Gottmans discuss t...
Mar 08, 2019•58 min
We're up to big things over here! Listen in for some Smart Couple Podcast updates and an upcoming events download. SHOWNOTES: Jayson’s Teaching A Kripalu Workshop In March In MA! [4:00] Jayson’s Mini Conflict Workshop @ Yoga Pod In Boulder On Saturday, March 9th [7:00] Smart Couple Podcast Update [8:00] Why You Should Consider Becoming A Relationship Coach [9:00] Action Step [12:00] Check out the webpage for this Smart Couple Podcast episode at https://relationshipschool.site/podcast228...
Jan 30, 2019•16 min
Interested in a super useful and deeply moving webinar replay featuring a legendary couple, both of whom are couples therapist and bestselling authors? If so, you’re in luck! SHOWNOTES: Why Do Couples Fight? [5:00] Expecting Your Partner To Fulfill Your Unmet Childhood Needs [10:00] What Does It Take To Love Your Partner More Than Yourself? [19:00] The Importance Of Being Present [26:00] Applying The Still Face Experiment & Being Present To Adult Interaction [35:00] Turning Being Present Wit...
Jan 24, 2019•1 hr 34 min
If you're serious about wanting to grow and become a better version of yourself you need to know how to ask people to challenge you. Don’t be afraid to get that super valuable feedback! SHOWNOTES: Send Us Feedback At info@relationshipschool.com ! [1:00] Why Challenge Is Essential In Partnership [2:00] Escape A Stagnant Relationship With Challenge [4:00] How To Play The "Challenge" Game [5:00] Possible Changes Coming To The Podcast [7:00] Check out the webpage for this Smart Couple Podcast episod...
Jan 15, 2019•9 min
Your relationship on shaky ground? Learn the five signs of an insecure relationship and some steps you can take to build the secure relationship we all deserve. SHOWNOTES: What Type Of Insecurity Are You Experiencing [3:00] Sign #1 - Not Emotionally Safe & Relaxed [5:00] Sign #2 - Not Feeling Seen [6:00] Sign #3 - You Don’t Feel Supported After A Fight [7:00] Sign #4 - You Don’t Feel Challenged [8:00] Sign #5 - You Feel Like You Can’t Express Yourself [9:00] Info On Upcoming Free Web Events ...
Jan 09, 2019•13 min
In this episode, Jayson and Ellen speak with relationship mentors Gabrielle and Ted Usatynski about their spiritual journeys and how incorporating relational and scientific knowledge made each of them spiritually stronger than ever before. SHOWNOTES: Who are Gabrielle & Ted Usatynski? [6:00] Advantages And Challenges Of Spirituality In Relationship [14:00] Problems Ted & Gabrielle Saw In The Spiritual Community [23:00] Pros & Cons Of Devotion To One School Of Thought Vs Many [26:00] ...
Jan 04, 2019•1 hr 24 min
In this unique episode, Jayson and high school student Evalyn Peacey exchange questions about small talk, screen time, online relationships and much more. SHOWNOTES: How Should Students Be Taught To Deal With Disagreements [5:00] Why Are We Supposed To Keep Things Shallow In Small Talk [6:00] What Are Some Methods To Get Couples To Open Up And Communicate? [9:00] Some Of Jayson’s Biggest Suggestions For Young People [11:00] Why Do So Many Young People Struggle To Communicate And Bond [13:00] How...
Dec 20, 2018•35 min
Author and researcher Warren Farrell unpacks his new book The Boy Crisis showing nothing predicts hardship in a boy’s life more than being ‘dad deprived’. Who is Warren Farrell? [1:00] What Inspired Warren To Focus On Gender? [4:00] Why Is The Father’s Contribution To A Child’s Development Undervalued? [10:00] Research Findings On The Dad Deprived Boy [10:00] Connecting The #MeToo Movement To Raising Boys [17:00] How Boys Are Being Encouraged To Stay Silent [26:00] Defensiveness: Humankind’s Ach...
Dec 12, 2018•58 min
Saying sorry is the default, socially acceptable response to conflict but it’s also a cop-out. Learn to respond in a way that leads to REAL repair so the kids in your life learn to do the same. SHOWNOTES: Why It’s Shitty Advice To Tell Your Kid To Say Sorry [2:00] Are You Teaching Your Kid To Say Sorry To Let Yourself Off The Hook? [3:00] What Kids Who Only Say Sorry Become As Adults [5:00] Two Ways To Respond To Conflict That Are Better Than Just Saying I’m Sorry [6:00] Check out the webpage fo...
Dec 05, 2018•9 min
Clinician and teacher, Stan Tatkin, explains what scientific research is telling us about pair bonding, adult attachment, and how to avoid triggering unwanted reactions. SHOWNOTES: Who Is Stan Tatkin? [1:00] Info On Stan’s New Book ‘We Do’ [4:00] Going From Me To We Is Not About Codependency [6:00] What is PACT & Psychobiology? [10:00] Questions You Need To Ask Yourself If You Had a “Great” Childhood [19:00] Allostatic Load And The Intersection Between Health and Security [24:00] How To Star...
Nov 29, 2018•1 hr 6 min
In this episode, psychotherapist Terri Cole shares some creative (and funny) strategies for handling problematic family relationships. SHOWNOTES: Why Interacting With Family Can Be So Difficult [1:00] Terri Cole’s Family Experience [3:00] The Importance Of Boundaries and Language With Family [7:00] Examples Of Managing Family Dysfunction Successfully [9:00] Strategies For Avoiding Unwanted Conversations With Family [14:00] Is It Okay To Just Walk Away From Shitty Family Conversations? [19:00] Ta...
Nov 15, 2018•34 min
THE HOLIDAYS ARE COMING! Are you ready for all the family time? Start preparing now and turn your annual holiday drama into time you really enjoy. SHOWNOTES: Why Holiday Cheer Can Be Such Bullshit [2:00] What Role Are You Playing To Appease Your Extended Family? [4:00] Consider Cutting Your Parents Some Slack [6:00] Terri Cole Holiday Drama Hotline Info [8:00] Two Mindsets To Adopt For The Holidays [11:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this episode visit https://relationshipschoo...
Nov 07, 2018•16 min
So you're dealing with a breakup. In this episode, Jayson offers a guided meditation to help you work this heartache out of your system. SHOWNOTES: A Guided Meditation For People Facing A Breakup [2:00] Is Your Past Pain Playing Into Your Current Heartache? [12:00] Choose Who To Talk To About Your Breakup Wisely [14:00] How Relationship School Coaches Can Help You Through Your Separation [18:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this episode visit https://relationshipschool.net/podca...
Oct 31, 2018•21 min
If your partner feels like a 'ball and chain’, you're doing something wrong. You can feel free to totally be yourself AND have an intimate partnership. SHOWNOTES: A Question From A Podcast Listener About Giving Space [2:00] Intimacy vs Closeness [4:00] Why the 'Ball and Chain' joke is such bullshit [6:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this episode on taking space and being yourself visit https://relationshipschool.net/podcast216 To sign up for Embracing Conflict Weekend, taking p...
Oct 23, 2018•10 min
In this final installment of a three-part series on conflict, learn four things you can do post-conflict to repair the relationship as quickly as possible. SHOWNOTES: Four Things To Do To Reconnect After A Fight [4:00] Embracing Conflict Weekend Info [10:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for part three in this conflict series visit https://relationshipschool.net/podcast215 To sign up for Embracing Conflict Weekend, taking place November 9th - 11th in Boulder, Colorado, visit https://...
Oct 17, 2018•14 min
In part two of this three-part series on conflict, Jayson breaks down the two skills you need when you're in the heat of it and explains the different types of fights. SHOWNOTES: Embracing Conflict Weekend Info [1:00] Two Things To Do During Your Next Fight [2:00] The Three Types Of Fights [8:00] To sign up for Embracing Conflict Weekend, taking place November 9th - 11th in Boulder, Colorado, click here . Use the promo code "smartcouple" before October 15th and get $100 off! For the full Smart C...
Oct 10, 2018•14 min
Few things can rip a partnership or friendship apart like conflict. In part one of this three-part series on conflict, Jayson proposes ten pre-conflict agreements to transform conflict from a threatening experience into a growth opportunity. SHOWNOTES: Why Learning How To Do Conflict Is Important [1:00] Ten Agreement You Should Make With Your Partner BEFORE Conflict [3:00] Learn How To Do Conflict Well At The Upcoming Embracing Conflict Weekend! [18:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage ...
Oct 04, 2018•21 min
Weddings include a lot of really great traditions. But those old school 'in sickness and in health' vows suck. Find out how to do vows the right way. SHOWNOTES: Personalized Wedding Vows Vs Traditional Vows [2:00] Why You Should Revisit Your Vows … Over & Over Again [5:00] Good Vows Challenge Your Partner [7:00] Tell Us About Your Wedding Vows! [11:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this Wedding Vows Dos and Don'ts episode visit https://relationshipschool.net/podcast212...
Sep 26, 2018•14 min
You've submitted questions. Jayson's got answers! This Ask Me Anything episode addresses feelings of inadequacy and mismatched sex drives. SHOWNOTES: Why We Sometimes Feel We’re Not Enough & What To Do About It [2:00] What To Do When Your Partner Has A Different Sex Drive [6:00] How To Submit Your Questions [10:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this Ask Me Anything episode visit https://relationshipschool.net/podcast211...
Sep 18, 2018•12 min
Have a partner, friend or family member with an addiction? Feeling discouraged about their ability to change? Well, often times at the core of addiction ... is a relationship problem. SHOWNOTES: The Connection Between Addiction And Prior Relationship Issues [2:00] Tips For People Who Love An Addict [4:00] Why Trying To Help Save Them Is A Bad Idea [7:00] Addressing The Addict In Your Life Starts With You [10:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this episode about addiction and partn...
Sep 06, 2018•14 min
Society often glorifies the caretaker to a saint-like status. But, it’s important to know when caretaking reaches the point of actually being more harmful than helpful. SHOWNOTES: What is Caretaking? [1:00] The Caretaker Blindspot [4:00] Slipping From Being A Caretaker And Into Codependency [7:00] Action Step [10:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this episode about caretaking visit https://relationshipschool.net/podcast209...
Aug 29, 2018•12 min
Do you feel safe and secure? Seen and understood? Supported and loved? On a daily basis? Are you spending a fortune cleaning up after your failed relationships? In this episode, Jayson answers your questions about DPIR® and breaks down why the course is so worth it. Click here to apply. SHOWNOTES: Think About WHY You Were Anxious About Going Back To School [1:00] Some Important Questions You Need To Ask Yourself [5:00] You Have Room For Growth & That's A Responsibility [10:00] Some Things Yo...
Aug 22, 2018•37 min
According to professor and therapist Dr. Alexandra Solomon, engaging your partner in conversation about their past experiences is one of the best things you can do to keep your relationship sexy and exciting. Listen in to find out why! Who is Dr. Alexandra Solomon? [6:00] Alexandra Defines "Relational Self-Awareness" [8:00] Are Some People Just More Interested In Self-Awareness? [10:00] How Gender Norms Encourage Defensiveness [13:00] Alexandra’s Theories About Why People Avoid Introspection [23...
Aug 09, 2018•1 hr 5 min
You know those couples where the woman handles almost everything and the man, well ... kind of kicks back and acts like a teenager? That's the mother-son dynamic and in this episode, you'll learn how to escape that relationship trap and figure out why it happens in the first place. The Mom-Son Dynamic From A Woman’s Perspective [3:00] The Mom-Son Dynamic From A Guy’s Perspective [5:00] How to Help A Couple Living In A Parent-Child Relationship [9:00] How The Male Ego Comes Into Play [16:00] For ...
Aug 01, 2018•19 min
As grand prize winners of a recent Smart Couple podcast contest, Heather and Thomas got to sit down for a free session with Jayson. In this emotional and inspiring interview, Jayson helps Heather and Thomas dig into their past to find answers they've been seeking for years. Heather Lays Out Her Side Of The Story [8:00] Thomas Connects With Heather’s Past [20:00] Find Out WHY Your Partner Reacts That Way [28:00] Where Does The Smack You Talk To Yourself Come From? [38:00] Ways To Shake Things Up ...
Jul 25, 2018•54 min
A lot of things you take personally in relationship have very little to do with your partner. Those issues are really the result of YOUR past, YOUR triggers and YOUR perspective...So says long-time Boulder, Colorado therapist & expert in the field of Child and Adult Attachment Theory and Models, Dr. Diane Poole Heller. How The Therapy Field Chose Diane [7:00] Why The Attachment Model Is So Central To Diane’s Work [12:00] The Kind Eyes Exercise [19:00] The Three Attachment Styles [21:00] Why ...
Jul 11, 2018•1 hr 25 min
We all want a little reassurance. And that's okay! But as Jayson's wife Ellen Boeder points out, if you're needing reassurance because you feel jealous, the issue you should address is the insecurity in your relationship. Is Monogamy The Problem Or Insecure Attachment? [1:00] The Power Of Reassurance [5:00] Two Impediments To Reassurance [10:00] Navigating A Jealous Partnership [13:00] For the full Smart Couple Podcast webpage for this episode featuring Ellen Boeder visit https://relationshipsch...
Jul 03, 2018•17 min
