Addiction Recovery Redefined: Living as a Creator, Not a Victim - podcast episode cover

Addiction Recovery Redefined: Living as a Creator, Not a Victim

May 25, 202541 min
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Episode description

What does it truly mean to be recovered from addiction, not just perpetually "in recovery"? Is lasting freedom, a complete rebirth, an achievable reality rather than a lifelong battle?

In this powerful and deeply transformational episode of the Recovered Addict podcast, hosts Duane Yardman-Frank and Jason Rigby challenge the conventional labels and timelines associated with healing. After a decade of dedicated work, Duane shares his profound shift in perspective: why the identity of being "in recovery" no longer resonates, and how full biological, spiritual, and emotional restoration is not only possible but is the pathway to a life of genuine thriving.

Join Duane and Jason as they meticulously unpack the journey from the initial chaos of addiction to embodying a new, empowered identity as a fully RECOVERED individual. This isn't merely about survival or maintenance; it's about a complete personal transformation, a reclaiming of your intrinsic power as a creator of your life, moving decisively beyond the victim narrative.

In this episode, you'll discover the three crucial phases of this transformation:

  • Phase 1: Stabilizing the Biological Chaos: Dive into the foundational steps essential for calming the physical storm addiction leaves behind. Learn about the non-negotiable power of total abstinence and the critical role of fueling your body with a nutrient-dense diet to rebuild cellular health and restore physical equilibrium. This stage is about laying a solid biological groundwork for deeper healing.

  • Phase 2: Psychological Reframing & Embracing a Creator Identity: This is where the mental battleground shifts. Understand how to consciously move from a disempowering victim mentality to embracing your inherent power as the architect of your reality. We explore actionable, life-altering tools such as the consistent practice of daily journaling for emotional processing and clarity, alongside the profound impact of gratitude prayers in reshaping your mental landscape and fostering robust mental health.

  • Phase 3: Spiritual Mastery & Living Fully in the Present Moment: Ascend to a new level of awareness, inner peace, and spiritual connection. This phase focuses on learning to live deeply and authentically in the present moment, a space where, as Jason Rigby powerfully states, "In the present moment, there is no addiction." It's about discovering a renewed life purpose, mindfully creating order out of past chaos, and connecting with your higher self.

Memorable Insights You Won't Want to Miss:

  • "In the present moment, there is no addiction." – Jason Rigby
  • "I became a new person. My cells regenerated, and so did my spirit." – Duane Yardman-Frank
  • "We are not victims. We are creators of our lives now." – Duane Yardman-Frank


This episode is an essential listen for anyone on a sobriety journey who yearns for something more than just daily management of their condition. It is for those who are ready to embrace the possibility of a full rebirth, a complete personal transformation that leads to a new life defined by unshakeable inner peace, expansive spiritual growth, and authentic, lasting freedom.

If you've ever felt confined or limited by the "in recovery" label, or if you're seeking a path to a deeper, more holistic form of healing, this conversation will illuminate the way.

Tune in to Recovered Addict and explore how you, too, can transcend old identities and step into the fullness of a life completely reclaimed.

Keywords for discoverability: addiction recovery, recovered addict, mental health, spiritual growth, sobriety journey, personal transformation, inner peace, healing journey, new identity, addiction freedom, biological healing, psychological healing, spiritual mastery, abstinence, nutrient-dense diet, creator mindset, overcoming addiction, self-help, motivation, inspiration.

Transcript

Dwayne, we're back here. We are. So you got 15 years in, 15 years of not marriage, 15 years of what recovery? And you know, like I was telling you off air, we get a lot of people that talk about us using the word recovered addict and they don't like the past tense have recovered, you know, and and so my question to them is, why can't you be like, like, why? Like, why can't things be past tense?

Or even more important? And you know about this, if we just live in the present moment, then there is no addiction. That's very powerful, yes. What do I need outside of the present moment? There's. Absolutely, absolutely nothing. And in the present moment, we're in communion with God. Yes. So guess what happens there when we are God and we are all God, then in that very moment we have we're we're perfect.

We're just yeah, so, you know, for me, and so I kind of wanted to break it down because people are like, oh, that's woo woo bullshit. You know, so I kind of want to do it more in like phases and how that happens to get recovered. If we want to say, I think you know, like foundational those first year and you know this because you, you assist in help people on a weekly basis the first year, you know, like that's where you're trying to

break the addiction cycle. And the problem that we have is stabilizing biology. And so we got to stabilize because your body's all fucked up. But then you also have to build initial tools, if that makes sense. What, what do you like? I want you to kind of go, if you don't mind, like pretend you're sitting across from somebody in there, you know, three months in four months in five months and they got to try to get to the year. What are some of those initial

tools that you share? Man, this is just such a fantastic Ave. to head down. We have an array of tools at our disposal. Really what we got to start discussing initially is the willingness to try something different and we're really is to try and behave counterintuitive to our condition behavior that I liked what you said initially just about the body needing to stabilize Fool is just understanding. I'm for the past however many years I've been partaking in my addiction.

I'm in complete fight or flight all the time. Yes, I'm in the sympathetic nervous system. I'm prepared for battle. My hormones are dumping cortisol. I'm existing at a level of stress that just most people you know would be burnt to a crisp and we think that is normal. We think that's a normal feeling to go through the world with anxiety, to go through the world irritable, to go to world and and pissed off we're not getting

our way seeking control. That's a very normal existence for an addict or alcoholic, anyone suffering from a serious addiction. So it's a good tool to just start to see my, my, my, my biology is all out of whack. This is I, I, it's very funny, you know, you start getting these little slivers, these little intimations of a feeling that, that this is so weird. What's going on here? I'm not not feeling aggressive right now. What's happening to me? I've got three weeks.

Oh man, I got a month. What's it's like that's called inner peace. You don't know what the fuck that feels like. So we just initially a great tool is just beginning to observe our emotions. There's a gauntlet. There are countless tools that are available to us. We have to be honest. We have to get serious about trying to be the best version of

ourselves. Another important piece of our understanding in regards to the reason we call ourselves Recovered Addict podcast is, you know, at the beginning of Genesis, God ordered the world out of chaos. So when we start to bring in order and structure into our lives. I heard something the other day, bro. Just I've been, I've been hitting it left and right as much as I can. Routine doesn't just help me survive the chaos. Routine helps me shape it. I started shaping my own world

with and order and discipline. Alcoholics are very undisciplined. Addicts are very undisciplined. We do the fuck we want whenever the fuck we want, and it's pure chaos and we're fly by the seat of our pants. So we start bringing in a lot of order. We start bringing in a lot of structure. In that respect, I become my own creator, start my own reality. And on the flip, on the on the mastery portion of that, which we'll get to here shortly, That's where we start to

articulate. I have recovered that chaos. I've recovered from a hopeless state of mind and body broke. We've been doing this so long, every single cell in our body regenerates at least once every seven years now, even our bones. Now every single cell in my body has regenerated at rated at least twice since. I've been free from addiction, free from alcohol, free from drugs, and I have recovered. My body is completely new. I'm not the same person anymore.

Yeah. And I don't think people realize that. But biologically I want to, I want because we're going to go in each step, you know, and kind of what happens almost kind of reverse engineer, especially with you from your 15 years to now biological what we're talking about. I think it's really important to commit to total abstinence. Absolutely.

Yeah. The other the other there's I can't teach you how to do like a little bit of weed or I can't teach you how to like let's let's micro dose of mushrooms, but not to go to the bar after, you know. Yes, yeah, I think this requires that. Absolute abstinence is the only stance that I know how to teach other people because the only stance that ever works for me.

Yeah, and I think for, for alcohol, it's really, really important that if you're an alcoholic, you have to think there's no, I'll just drink a couple beers here. You know, it doesn't work. And #2 is, and we believe this wholeheartedly, is a nutrient dense diet. Buy it. If you want to biologically recover, you've got to get vitamin D. You've got to get Omega threes and tons of protein. You've been living on carbs as an addict. Sugar and carbs, your friend. Yep, it's also, but it's.

A bad at friend. And I don't know why my tin goes from here to here, but I but I do like my sith of vodka at night. Yes, yeah. So Omega threes, proteins, magnesium, vitamin D, just do those nutrient dense diet full of protein and then 30 minutes a day of exercise, whether it's walking, whether it's lifting weights. Yeah, that's the biological part. The countless, countless benefits, the weight training, the strength training, the cardio, the whatever. I did something hard.

It's like in yourself. It's like a diamond. It's like a diamond was created through a lot of pressure and a lot you got to you got to put yourself through that pressure in order to emerge into something new. But not only the biology, some of the the biochemistry behind it. I start popping endorphins. I start feeling good about the person I am about the hard thing I just accomplished. I didn't have to take I didn't have to take a substance in order to feel something good in

order to yes, yes, powerful. It's so it's very motivating. This is what I I created a whole business around this because it's so it's so productive, it's so powerful and the and we did. 2 episodes on this. Yes absolutely. So go back and watch those episodes. The nutrient dense is huge. Average male needs to be consuming 250 grams of protein a day. Yeah, that's you would be shocked how much.

So how the heck do you eat 250 grams of protein a day and try and maintain a calorie balance or small deficit? The answer is I eat a shit load of protein and not a lot else. Yeah, exactly. And that will that will automatically start to stabilize your biologically just that alone internally you begin to stabilize. I want to get into the psychological aspect of it.

We're going to stay mindful based because I have a spiritual side, but the mindful base is just being mindful, understanding what relapse is, being mindful of that and then, you know, adopting prevention cycles. And then one thing that you did, and I think it's and we've talked about this a lot is journal daily to reframe the triggers and adopt. I'm going to use a word that a lot of people don't know about a high agency identity.

High agency is like, like you have talked about, like I'm this man and I want to be this man, you know, our woman. But I, this is what the best of me looks like. I'm high agency. Yes, a higher self or the best version on here. Yeah, absolutely, absolutely. The introspection is so, so beautiful. If I have a it's very helpful to let these emotions that are kicking my ass live someplace other than inside my body.

So I'm giving myself a chance to kind of detox from these very, very stressful, anxiety ridden emotions, fearful emotions, angry emotions that I'm very used to. I'm giving them somewhere else to live and that other place to live is on is on paper. Yes. This isn't a keyboard deal, this isn't a text to type in your phone deal, although those things can be beneficial. For me, it was, it was pen meets paper. Something very spiritual happens when pen meets paper.

And then I get to start to look at myself accurately too. Now I have an honest appraisal, but I I'm actually going through so it's not. So it's not like trying to navigate muddy water. You know, I kind of get a clear picture of these are the issues. And then what happened for me, Jay, I know we'll jump into the spiritual, but what happened for me was I saw I was writing. I saw I was taught right.

The issue immediately bringing the appropriate power, something like God, I need your help or God shine your light on this. I didn't know it then, but I was writing my prayers. And what ended up happening over time was I started building a relationship with a God that I could do business with. Yes, yes, through writing. It was like God my pen, yes. Yeah, 100% and it's so funny. Right here at my desk. Here is my my journal and then here is my handbook of praying

scripture. That's awesome, So. Just what you said a journal 5/10/15 minutes a day, 20 minutes, however long it takes while I'm drinking my coffee. And then I always want to take the word and have it in my life in some way. It always touches me, you know, and so for me, you know, it's it's Jesus's teachings. You know, I love our the Psalms, you know, our proverbs or

something like that. Those are what I go into and that leads us into spiritual define a how a higher power, our purpose in in in a one cent statement like a tweet for you. What is what is higher power or purpose look like for you? Is it being of service? Is it being is it is it having truth? Like I'm going to live truth? I'm I fucking live for a decade. I lived, you know, false bullshit. So whatever, but come up with

that one sentence statement. And then I also, I think, and I'll let I also think what we're just talking about is daily meditation or prayer. And and here's the cool part. Prayer is meditation. It's just active. You know, whether you're doing affirmations. You don't have to sit there and an addict trying to meditate and be an addict, that doesn't work. You're not going to be able to sit there and be still, but you can walk around and pray. Yeah, absolutely didn't work for me.

The sit across like there is a good approach, a lot of people can do it, but that didn't that approaching work for me. The meditation I found work best for me, as you know, is cycling on the bike. I put yes, put prayer or meditation in my headphones, in my ears. And then I put on beautiful scenery on the teller that I happen in my den, like whatever scenic relaxation videos and it's beautiful nature images all around the globe and the natural

wonders, blah blah. And then then I cycle and then as I'm listening to my prayer to my mantra, I, I, I have my mantra. I have the parents have the meditation. Just like you said, praying is meditating. Meditating is praying for me. They really bleed together like I'm doing both at the same time and did some of the mantras that work well for me. Are that purpose are that meaning that you discuss, find it, find a higher power that you can do business with.

And then a purpose. What's your purpose? What your, what you, what are you passionate about? What you're calling? What do you call to do is to light you up on the inside. There needs to be a resonation needs to resonate inside of you. If it puts a shit eating grin on your face, that's a good sign. That's like, oh, I'm heading in the right direction here. One of the ones that works very well for me is I expand an infinite love, abundance and

success. I extend an infinite love, abundance and success and I hit it over and over and over again. Thank you God for this moment. Thank you God for this moment. We know the undercurrent of the prayer is balsada exists in the present moment, be angry about what happened yesterday. I'm not trying to be fearful about what's going to happen tomorrow. I'm trying to honor the present

moment where all power exists. That's the only place I can touch God. And in the present moment, as you got for this moment, thank you God for this moment. So we start touching genuine power. We start building a relationship with the thing that's powerful enough to heal our addiction. That's the thing that pulls a stock from the gates of death. That's the thing that changed my behavior. Order routine, invite God into that process. It's super powerful.

I became a new person, bro. That's how we become recovered. Yeah, it's 100%. And, and I want to give people in this stage, this one year stage real quick, and then we're going to go to phase two. But 4K PIS or keep performance indicators, however you want to say it, Four things that you know you can grade yourself off of #1 is 365 days of abstinence. You already fucked yourself. That hasn't happened.

So start from zero, start on one and I'm going to go one through 365, you know, so that's the first one because a year can start. You know, you can start a year anytime. If you if you if you commit to this today, you can start your year right now. It doesn't have to wait till January the 1st. And then you need had to have 50 plus support group meetings. That's one almost every week. Maybe you're sick two weeks. So you don't go, but you either have to have the flu or be

really sick. If you don't, you have to make a commitment. If you do not have a flu or you're not super sick or you're going to hurt somebody else, you go to a meeting period once a week and then 80% diet, exercise appearance. So, you know, you can look at that and be like, fuck, I haven't gone to a meeting in two weeks. Well, instantly, you know what I need to do, You know, our, our shit.

I've, I've gotten off my diet. I need to go back on to this because any one of these things and then #4 of course is what we just talked about, you know, is prayer, meditation, affirmations, you know, having that spiritual side. So if you're out on any of those 4, though, one of those 4 will lead you to falling off the wagon. Absolutely. If you stick with those four things, you're going to do good. You could you could just bracket that and say this is a program of action.

If you follow, if you take these actions, you have a very high likelihood of there is successful sobriety. I like live 15 years later. It's by the grace of God, my life is bigger than it's ever been, and that was accomplished one day at a time, one day at a yes. When shit gets heavy, it's an hour at a time. When she gets super heavy, it's a minute at a time. The prayers literally next right thing, next right thing. God help me to do the next right thing.

God help me do the next right thing. And then that that that you nailed it with the the support group. It's what a minimum once a week you have to be plugged in to a community have to be plugged into a support group. What that really sounds like is do not isolate. Yes, yes, us, us alone and our problems. Me Dwayne and Dwayne's mind are not the best playmates. They don't up with the best idea, right? Right.

I need to be plugged into other people that didn't call me on my shit, but also other other people that are going to provide me with wisdom. Wisdom is collected. That's oh good. That's so good. If I if I was big enough to get sober by myself I would have fucking done it like. 100%, yeah. We all need help and it's totally OK to just start where you're at, improve that diet and and and exercise. Shoot for 80%. You just have a high aim.

Just head in that direction. We're going to fuck it up every single day, but at least I have an aim. At least I have a direction. And if that prayer, meditation, building a relationship with higher power, bro, if, if, if, if you do all of those things as a way of life, We say I'm recovered. I, I have had I have experienced recovery sufficient enough to bring about a personality shift. I'm a different person. Like my personality has

literally changed my walk. I grew up in the in the same town and we actually grew up across the street from each other going to high school. Wow. Bro, we didn't go to the same high school, but we did with our high schools. River did right down the street from each other. Santa Fe is a small city, you know what I mean? Like everyone kind of knows everyone. We never met when and I say thank God because that's what I did the majority of my drinking.

And if I had met her then there she wouldn't want to have anything to do with me. Nobody wanted anything to do with me. I'm a different person. Like she met me at the right time. That's awesome. Yeah. Let's get into phase two. This is great, bro. We're you're nailing it. So this is years 2:00 to 5:00. This is that consolidation, the rewiring of the neural and the psychological patterns and the solidifying of your purpose and your restoration to functionality in life.

So biologically, you're still maintaining abstinence. So that's that's kicking. You're hopefully you're doing your diet and your exercise. The reason you have to do diet and exercise and why it's so important, I would put it up there super high as far as not relapsing is because you must normalize dopamine and you have to keep the epigenetics going and I know you could talk about that. Yeah, absolutely, man. There's a new form of science.

It's fucking. We can literally turn on new cells, new proteins in our genes dependent upon our environment. And the question that arises from that's like, Oh my God. And then the the epigenetics is actually finding those new cells, those new genes can be passed down. Yes. Yes, from generation to generation, which is absolutely exciting, but the point of OK, the environment turning on my genes, the question that arises is what's my environment? What type of environment am I

creating? Am I creating a world where I have higher power and I can lean on something bigger than myself? Am I creating a world where I'm prioritizing inner peace and service to others? Am I creating a world where I have a purpose in my life and I'm and I'm high functioning, I actually have a job that I show up to. I feel good that I've accomplished my workouts. I feel healthier in my body because I'm nailing my protein goals, my nutrition goals. Is that the environment I'm

creating? Or am I creating an environment where I'm terrified because I didn't show up for work? There's empty bottles all around me that I don't know who's at the front door? I'm pretty afraid to answer because it might be the cops, it might be the landlords. I don't fucking know. I don't want an answer. I'm hiding under the sheets, you know what I mean? What? What environment am I creating?

What genes am I turning on that epigenetics is a fucking superpower right now for us, We can turn the volume up on healing. We can turn the volume up on getting well and being high functioning. And then you know, very well, bro, addicts are the best entrepreneurs there are. Like yes. If you turn that energy. Yes, take that desire, that energy to get loaded and redirect it into recovery. Bro you're. Unstoppable, unstoppable.

This is really cool because I think in these in these, these years that's happening from a psychological standpoint, I feel this can sometimes not be it. It this victim mindset can still come out years 2 through 5. And what I believe we should be doing, and I know you're going to agree 100% is what you're talking about is we need to embrace a creator identity. Oh yeah, we're creators now. Absolutely. We, we. Well, this is what we've been discussing the entire time prompted.

Very simple. This is right. I talked to about the people that I try and help, especially the clients that I have at the gym. Are you the victim of your life, creator of your life? That answer is simple for us. It's just tough. If I'm if I'm serious about getting into into and having long term recovery, if I'm serious about that, that means I'm also willing to take 100% responsibility for what's going on in my hand. Yeah, yeah, it's. Not slice and surroundings and my environment.

It's my environment. Starts here with my head. If I'm willing to tear 100% responsibility, that also means we start paying attention to our thoughts, those victim thoughts, those fear thoughts, those if only she was different, I would be OK Thoughts those are delusions aren't. That is not reality. I'm playing the victim when I'm lost up here in the itty bitty shitty committee and I'm hoping and I'm hoping the whole world was behave Dwyane's Wade.

It's just a losing strategy. A better strategy for us, of course, is self sacrifice for the future. I'm going to make a sacrificial decision now, which might look like going to a meeting. I'm going to make a sacrificial decision now that might look like take 35 minutes and go to the fucking gym. I'm going to take a sacrificial decision now and say take my ass to the grocery store and buy some food on the around on the outer perimeter of the grocery

by home. Get some fucking eggs, get some fresh veggies, get nothing frozen, nothing in the middle or a yellow box. I'm going to take a sacrificial decision now, which is going to benefit future doing later. We're the only creatures on planet Earth that can do that, Jake. We're the only creatures that can plan for the future and then take action. Well, we have a creator and he put in US the ability to create. Yes, that's our identity. Our your true identity is to be

pure creator. And I, I want to say this, yes, from a spiritual aspect, in these years, you're going to forgive past mistakes, truly forgive. You're going to work on forgiveness because you're going to be more mature. You're going to be able to do that. And then, and, and I want you to talk about this, Dwayne, you're going to frame addiction as a teacher, not as you're not a victim anymore.

You have a creator identity. So the framing, the reframing, the reprogramming of addiction becomes that that addiction past tense. Was a teacher, Absolutely bro. So so powerful. I know we're throwing a lot of people quickly, addicts and Alcoholics, once they commit to a recovery program and start doing the deal and living this way of life we are fucking phenomenal at. I mean yes, throwing absolute shit into gold. Make absolute shit and transmute it into gold.

Ow on earth was hell. All that pain, all that destruction that I experienced as an active alcoholic, how is that today one of my greatest assets? It's something I do not regret. It's something that I do not want to try and turn my back to. I don't regret it. How? How can I make it useful for me today? Well, looks like stuff like this looks like doing a podcast where we're trying to be of service to

other. It looks like extending out the hand of help, letting other people know that this life is available, available for you. Getting, getting better, having improvement, getting healthy and living well is available for you. Jason's done it. I've done it. There's a way out We can show you a way out we want. Yeah, I lost. Yes. That's so good bro.

I also want people to understand year three-year 4 now, since you are a creator and you're creator now, it's time to take that social community leadership role. And how you do that is to become a sponsor. Talk about talk about helping someone else and how much that's helped you, Dwayne, by helping other addicts. You know, it's a very powerful spiritual paradox to say something like I cannot transmit something I don't have.

So if I want to try and teach somebody spiritual principles, I need to know those spiritual principles myself. So there's an initial self improvement that takes place, but it doesn't come full circle. It's like, what's the point? Good for you, Dwayne. You got a lot of knowledge. Right, right. Yes, yeah. What's the? Fucking point. If I'm not sharing that with other people and trying to also enrich their lives, it's like, it's like, we're so selfish, brother. It's like I said, if I said

Jason and I, how are you doing? And you said, oh, hey, doing good. And you say I'm making a sandwich and you say, Hey, can I have half of your sandwich? And I was like, well, I don't. I'm kind of planning on eating all of it. And and that's how selfish we are, bro. That's how addicts behave. But an idea, an idea or principle is not like that is I can say, hey, Jay, look at this idea. You and I do this all the time. Listen to this idea I just heard. I can share an idea with you.

You get to keep 100% of the idea and I get to keep 100% of the idea. We both benefit. And so we again again back to Genesis broke 11, God created the earth out of chaos. We start creating this helpful relationship where we're of service to other people. I'm creating a world where I'm actually here to help. I show up with the idea. What can I bring to the table rather than what do you have for me? And when I do that, I start to feel good about the man I am.

I set to light up on the inside. It feels way better than stealing your wallet and then trying to help you look for it after. Yes, you're embarrassed when I do that kind of shit. Dude, I love that that you went to Genesis 1-1 something I heard John 11, you know, in the New Testament, John 11 that says it says it says in the beginning was the word and the word is low is logos. Logos is the universal laws. And when you go against them,

guess what, they don't care. They're you're going to you go against the universal law, it's going to smack you back. That's the law. That's how it is. It's a law. If you speed and there's a cop, he can pull you over. It's the law there then you

could do it's a law. So in the beginning, before there was order, there was the law and then the law as the Spirit. Genesis 1/3 says the Spirit moved upon the water, you know, and then conserves without form and void and, and then through the law, God came in through with that with the Holy Spirit and then brought order. So you know, what's the water the. Water is chaos. God ordered the chaos with the law. We start, but you got to.

You got to have chaos, bro. You got to have water to have birth. Absolutely did. We need both. We need in the end and we, it's our job to just thread the line. We want to, we want to be on, you know, the proper balance of each. However, for addicts, it's just fucking chaos all the time. I've been drowning for a while. That's not a drink, that's a flood. Yes, yeah, 100%.

The last thing I want to talk about in this phase two before we get into phase three, which is mastery phase two, I think it's really important to understand that you need to when you're start looking at yeah, I'm going to meetings regularly. I have spiritual practices, I'm working out, I'm eating good. You know, I'm big, took a leadership role, I'm mentoring, you know, someone else. Something that can really help you is at least have two plus super meaningful restored

relationships at that time. Three to five years, 2 to 3:00 to 5:00 years. If you've been consistent and has had that amount of abstinence, you can introduce yourself back into relationships. You've earned the right. Absolutely, you know, and it with the proper guidance. The the most important suggestion is that we don't do those type of things alone.

We have proper guidance, just like you said, with appropriate mentorship and someone guiding me through this process in regards to restoring these relationships that the the healing, the miracle of healing that it takes place is so powerful, bro, because I get to come to these these individuals that I harmed in the past and say I was wrong. Is there anything I can do to make it right? Then I also get to say this is me making a commitment to never

be that type of man again. And then the deal with that is I actually have to change. I actually have to not be that type of man again. So I have to really go there with a sincere desire to be different. And this is just such a fucking huge, beautiful thing, bro. Because on one-on-one, from one perspective, I come to them different and they learn to, you know, OK. Over time, my actions can rebuild trust. It's very powerful. 100% a much better version of me, right?

This is the alchemy. This is the God starts to fill our hearts. What also takes places? Well, the best version of them gets to step forward also because they don't have to be in a flight or fight around. Me and. They have to be terrified of what Dwayne is going to do. When is he going to fly off the handle? When's he going to grab a bottle? The best version of them gets to step forward because now they can just exist around me.

Yeah, have to be afraid. That is like the heart gets filled up. And actually our recovery benefits the people closest to us this week. Give them that opportunity. They start to get better. I love that I love that I want to get into phase 3 here. The mastery part, whether that's if you're a go getter, that's year 6, if you're, if it may take you 10 years, like we're still, you know, you've been, you know, free for 15 years. I have food addiction. So I still face that here and

there. But it's not, you know, I make my meals, eat my meals, do my thing. I mean, you've known me for a long time. When I do have, when I do have something, it's intentional, it's purposeful. And it's a tin, you know, and I make sure, yeah, I make sure it's a tin. If it's not a tin, I don't need it. If it's garbage, I'm not going to need any of that stuff. But no fast food ton of that stuff. So what we look at with mastery is This Is Us living a purpose

driven high impact life. And it's us that we have integrated all the addictions lessons into our life because it was a big teacher for us. It was one of those big teachers that came along in our life. How we we've learned the lessons of those and we're integrating them in what we do daily. Recognize OOP, that that's a past thought. OOP Yeah. And of that, that's that's an addictive thought. I don't even want to go near that fucker and I I want to get into, you know, biological.

This is sustained abstinence, like you said, all the cells in your body. So if you are thinking about it, then it's just thought in your head. It has no power, there's nothing there. Your cells are completely clean and then health routines for you want to have you still. It takes a long time, especially if you use drugs. It takes a long time to get a baseline brain function that's healthy. So, you know, drinking tons of water, you drink a lot of water.

I drink a lot of water. I've got my big water jug. These are, I got BCAAS here that I put in here, you know, for after working out, you know, so we're, we're constantly drinking water. These are this is what's going to help help your brain and your brain, your brain's way slower to heal then especially if you did meth or you did a ton of

pills. Yes. And then, you know, at this level, you're monitoring stress, fatigue and you're getting it medical annual checkups, you're getting your blood done and you're practicing, you know, mindfulness, You're you're practicing a spiritual practice. This is what I want you to talk about because I think it's so important. A lot of people have a hard time and this happens like I talked to people still and they still haven't done this. And that's releasing shame.

And I put this at the end because I feel like a lot of people are stuck in this and it takes years and years and years. And I think that's that's why they say I'm still recovering or you could never say that you're recovered because it's the shame of the addiction. Does that make sense, Dwayne? I still am feeling shame of addiction. It makes sense. However, I would also just suggest that this is more of a lineage definition. It's kind of the way people are taught to approach recovery.

If you are taught you will never recover from this, your addiction is in the parking lot doing pushups waiting for you. Which I agree with. Like if I started drinking today, I know that I'm not going to have one. Not not really interested. I've never been interested in it. But the point is there may be many reasons people would be have a issue with our language

of recovered addict. I would totally agree that some of the shame surrounding my past behavior would propel me to be very serious about my perception of my disease. Like I as alcoholic, I will never be recovered from this. And a certain point, bro, we're kind of like at semantics. It's kind of like, well, that's the language choosing to use. However, you're not behaving the same way you used to. We one, one of the things that I teach are most of the people I

work with is pain. And this is not my language. This comes from, from literature that we, we, we just love pain. Is we've talked about this. We did a podcast on this. Pain is the touchstone to all spiritual growth. Most people I've felt many years, I thought touchstone meant like cornerstone, like, oh, I have to be in pain to grow spiritually. That's what a touchstone is. And it's like, no, that's not what touchstone. And I actually have to look it up.

A touchstone is a tool that was used by miners doing the gold rush and they would rub it on other rocks. It was a stone that they would rub on other rocks to see if the rock was gold, it to see if it had the color. So is the test to all spiritual growth? Am I behaving the same way or am I doing something different? The way I used to behave was pouring alcohol down my throat and not showing up for work. What I'm being different now is how about a little bit of prayer about that?

Can I ask God to enter and soften my heart? What am I doing different? Can I go to the gym and take out some stress and anger on the weights and I call someone that I trust? Hey Jay, can I bounce something off you right now? I'm getting my fucking ass kicked. Do I have support? So if I'm taking different action when I'm in pain, I'll recovering nothing. That behavior leads us into that mastery. I would ideally like that to permeate every area of my life. Yes, yes, yeah, 100%.

I think 1 of the big things too in this is people, of course we talked before. So this is somebody that's advanced, they have a purpose, they're driven, they're doing these things. But it's not until we start to develop a clear mission and live a clear mission. You've got to gain clarity in your mission. You've got to know what your, what is your mission because it may not be the job that you're at right now. It may be you being maybe an entrepreneur or maybe starting

your own business. Maybe it's you doing 2 jobs at the same time. Maybe it's, it's not being in the relationship that you, maybe you've spiritually outgrown the person that you're with. You know, a lot of people don't have clarity, and you need clarity if you want to continue being recovered. Absolutely, yeah. Otherwise, you know, you wander around in the desert, it's Exodus. All in Lost, it's Exodus, man. It's like. The tiny we. Got away. We got away from the tyrant.

Alcohol. But then we're in the desert. It's like I don't know what I am. I'm wandering around lost. So I have to have clarity, like you said, I have to have high aim. I have to have vision. Moses came down from Sinai with the Decalogue and said be this, do these 10 things and they became a people. Then they came Israel. They became yes, yes, they had a high aim. These 10 things. We're going to goof it up every

day. We're going to miss the mark, right, But at least I have direction ahead and be very clear on your mission. Be very clear on your your purpose. Be very clear on the thing that lights you up. What do you love during most bro you and I? Yes, there you go. Made have made businesses surrounding what we like doing most. Why would you do that? Why would you want to do it? Does that answer is simple. That's when I feel most alive. That's when I'm creating.

That's about Genesis bro. God told Adam you. You named the cattle. You do it. You order the world. You, you, you put things in their proper place. We're our own little atoms, our own little world. But without an aim. There's no fucking way I'm going to do that. I'm wondering where I'm lost. Dude, and that's that's so important. I want you know, people that have struggled with addiction to understand this.

When you get into these levels of year 678910, it is time for you to be done with the shame and start looking with the lessons that you've learned at high impact work. Trust me, you're being fearful. You have the ability if you conquered addiction, you have the ability to do high impact work. You should be making great

money. You should be doing something amazing if it's if it's if you just doing construction start a construction company, whatever it may be like you said, whatever lights your passion up, go do it. Maybe you do it part time. Maybe you do it on the weekends. You got plenty of time you don't need. We high impact people like you and I and what we've learned and and do we don't we don't waste time It's not like we we're working. Where do you work?

You work your ass off, bro. What time do you get up in the morning? Yeah 3:00 AM. You're getting up at 3, AMI feel. I feel bad now that I get up at 5:00 AM, but there's still tons of people sleeping. Yeah, there's still. Doors of equal you work way later than I worked. Though, so it's yeah, yeah, I'll work till 10 or 11 or whatever, or I'll have my laptop while I'm watching, you know, watch something on YouTube and have my laptop. But I warn people real quickly broke.

Take it back off of what you're saying in regards to this shame because it is so important. The high impact work helps me transmute that shame into gold. I'm I'm no longer ashamed of that bad behavior in the past because that experience can now help somebody else. I can come to someone hurting, bro. I can come to someone broken and bleeding and say, hey, I've been there too. Yeah, I did that also. Yeah. And I know what it feels like to behave that way.

Let me show you the way out, or let me offer you a path that worked. Yeah, I went to the redwoods, you know, the Redwood forest, and I always encourage everybody to go there. And it's so neat to see these huge monster trees that's been around for thousands of years, but they have some that are cut off and they're bigger than, you know, then they're like 12 feet around, you know, and there's

tree rings in there. And I want you to understand that your addiction, your pain, your suffering, the trauma of experience, everything, they're just tree rings. That's all they are. It's just showing you the years of what you've gone through. But those tree rings, it was really interesting. Park Ranger was talking about this. He goes, that's what creates the stability in the tree. And each of those rings are what it went through that year or multiple years.

But the wind, the storms, everything that goes on, it didn't blow the tree down. It just made the tree stronger. It needs that. You'll get a really weak tree if you don't have it from when it's it has to have the winds and storms and everything, you know, And yeah, we all may be Jonah and the whale may come, but the whales, the addiction. But what happened? It's spit him out. I couldn't even handle him. You know we're so powerful creators that Addiction can't even handle us.

That's right. That's exactly right. Then the whales spit Jonah out when he said yes to his responsibility, Said OK, yes I'll do this. Yeah, you think that that bottle is like a whale that's just surrounding and you're stuck inside of it, but that's bullshit. And then why then Jonah went right to a mission, and he saved the whole town. He. Said the town of people he hated. Exactly, he's like a racist that wouldn't do it that it saves everybody. Dude, It's that's how powerful you are too.

You're just you're just tree rings and so don't have shame over a fucking tree ring. Learn it and understand it. Say I've gone through more bullshit than most people have and guess what? That makes me a high impact person and I can do high impact work. I can be successful. I can, I can buy rentals, I can buy stocks. I can buy cryptocurrency. I can, I can do. I can work as in the C-Suite or I can own multiple businesses like you do. You can do this. I was homeless.

Dwayne was on the side of the road with Bloody. Yeah, absolutely, man. That's why we call it recovered ad is because we're nothing. We're we, we've come so far, bro. We we're different. I'm not that Jason. No. Yeah, that that Jason's gone. Well, Dwayne, this has been great. This has been awesome. 45 minutes. We hammered it. So this, this you're going to have to listen to like multiple times, guys. It's always an honor being with you guys. Invest in yourself.

That's the only person I'm willing to invest in, at least when it's set and getting nasty. You know what I mean? The only person I want to invest in is me and God.

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