When things aren’t going well in marriage, it’s easy to fall into a cycle of complaints, but gratitude can be a powerful antidote to bitterness and resentment. Here’s a quick recap of tips on maintaining gratitude: Acknowledge Small Wins : Start your day by focusing on one positive aspect of your partner or something they did that you appreciate. Focus on What You Can Control : Control your attitude, words, and actions. Be grateful for the choices you have, even in trying times. Look for Lessons...
Mar 28, 2025•10 min•Season 14Ep. 331
After an affair, most spouses want to know if they should stay or leave their spouse. Infidelity, I know, can be incredibly painful, but it is oh-so-important to discuss. As part of our ongoing miniseries, "Healing After Infidelity," I'm here to tackle a question that many of you have likely grappled with: "Are you committed to rebuilding your marriage?" Whether you're in the thick of betrayal or still grappling with the aftermath, I hope to offer guidance and encouragement as you navigate this ...
Mar 25, 2025•26 min•Season 14Ep. 330
It's a common dilemma in marriage: how to turn your spouse down for sexy time without feeling guilty. What do you do when one spouse isn't in the mood for sex yet doesn't want to hurt the other's feelings? That's the question of one listener who shared her experience and sought advice on saying no without guilt. Key Takeaways: Understanding Your Feelings: Take a self-assessment to identify why you might not be in the mood. Factors could include tiredness, stress, or emotional disconnect. The Pow...
Mar 21, 2025•9 min•Season 14Ep. 329
Today, we dive deep into the intricacies of healing after infidelity with our guests, Matthew and Joanna Rabsmith who've been married for fifteen years. They opened up about their experience with infidelity just three and a half years into their union. Matthew bravely shared his struggle with sex addiction, which was primarily linked to pornography. Both licensed marriage counselors and marriage coaches, they share their journey through infidelity in their marriage and how they emerged stronger ...
Mar 18, 2025•34 min•Season 14Ep. 328
A new listener, Gina, feels like she's putting all the effort into her marriage while her husband seems perfectly content with where things are. I totally get where she's coming from—I’ve been there! We'll talk about how to navigate this situation and discuss why behavior follows belief. I’ share some personal insights and strategies on how to motivate change in someone who doesn't see there's a problem by shifting those underlying beliefs. Whether you're trying to improve your marriage, your pa...
Mar 14, 2025•12 min•Season 14Ep. 327
One of the questions every betrayed spouse grapples with when dealing with infidelity is, "Why did this happen?" Infidelity can be one of the most challenging obstacles a marriage may face. Understanding the 'why' is crucial because every affair has a reason. It’s essential here to distinguish between a reason and an excuse. While reasons offer insights into underlying issues, excuses deflect responsibility. The truth is infidelity is always a choice, a willful decision, in nearly every case. Th...
Mar 11, 2025•28 min•Season 14Ep. 326
When it comes to meeting our spouse’s needs, marriage can feel like a complex game of tug of war. Today’s listener question brings us into the nuanced territory of communication and expectations between spouses. Our listener shares her frustration about feeling overwhelmed by her husband's evolving needs. She explained that her husband, previously very passive in communicating his needs, has transformed since starting therapy. While therapy is inherently a positive journey, in this case, it's br...
Mar 07, 2025•9 min•Season 14Ep. 325
We’re off the heels of our marriage conference and I have some insights to share for those looking to attend a marriage conference in the future. Information is only good if you have a revelation that causes transformation. And when it comes to strengthening our marriages, this couldn't be more true. So let's explore why attending a marriage conference might be the game-changer you've been looking for. Why Make the Commitment to Attend? You might be wondering, why attend a marriage conference? A...
Mar 04, 2025•30 min•Season 14Ep. 324
A listener who describes her marriage of eleven years as "routine" and feels she's outgrown her husband needs advice. She says that while her husband is a good man, she feels a lack of attraction due to his complacency with routine life. This includes his responsibilities at work, caregiving for his mother, and domestic duties, all of which have led their marriage to feel stagnant. She admits to being drawn to other men but remains committed to her marriage because of their children and shared r...
Feb 28, 2025•12 min•Season 14Ep. 323
How do you build a stronger marriage? Often, marriage is often seen as a path to happiness and companionship. But through my experiences and insights shared in this episode, I challenge this notion by inviting you to see marriage as a tool for personal and spiritual growth. This episode wraps up our three-part mini-series, "Mended: God's Plan for Marriage," where we explore the deep-seated essence of marriage, emphasizing resilience, growth, and alignment with your divine purpose. The episode be...
Feb 25, 2025•35 min•Season 14Ep. 322
Is your marriage on the line but you’re trying to win your spouse back? Rebuilding your marriage isn't easy, especially when your spouse isn't on the same page. In this episode, we address a listener's question about how to effectively communicate his desire to reconcile after a difficult time in his marriage. Despite being separated for three months due to past traumas and ego, he's actively working on self-improvement and seeking advice on how to win back his spouse without putting undue press...
Feb 21, 2025•11 min•Season 14Ep. 321
If you’ve ever questioned what marriage is truly about beyond friendship and happiness, this is the episode for you. We're continuing with part two of a mini-series dedicated to exploring some hidden truths about marriage. We begin by addressing the misconceptions society and culture often hold about marriage, such as its purpose is primarily happiness or getting our needs met. When we misunderstand the purpose of something, it leads to misuse and abuse. So buckle up. Christian marriage, in part...
Feb 18, 2025•25 min•Season 14Ep. 320
Valentine's Day is upon us! I'm answering a listener's question on whether women still care about Valentine’s Day gifts and what makes the perfect present. What are some gift ideas to make your special someone feel loved and appreciated? I've got a few suggestions up my sleeve. Highlights: Do Women Still Expect Gifts? I polled my friends to learn about their Valentine’s Day expectations—and the results were hilarious. Creative Gift Ideas: It’s not about how much you spend, but the thought and cr...
Feb 14, 2025•8 min•Season 14Ep. 319
"The Problem of Marriage” is the first part of my three-part mini-series, inspired by a sermon I recently preached at my church, focusing on some profound aspects of marriage—the marriage problems we face, the purpose behind marriage, and the incredible power marriage holds. Today, I'll be sharing insights on the problem of marriage, and I hope you find these reflections as enlightening and transformative as I did when preparing this series. Today's episode uncovers the roots of all marriage pro...
Feb 11, 2025•20 min•Season 14Ep. 318
I received a question from a listener whose husband wants to leave the marriage to seek “personal happiness.” She faces the difficult decision of whether to wait for him to find clarity or to move forward with divorce after their 24 years together, of which 13 were spent in marriage. Here are some of the highlights from the episode: Understanding Where Happiness is Found: I discussed the common misconception that happiness is a destination. In reality, happiness is a choice you make. Chasing aft...
Feb 07, 2025•10 min•Season 14Ep. 317
What is the real reason so many marriages are failing? It’s not often addressed in mainstream marriage advice. When we take a look at the core issue of marriage problems and look at scripture, personal experiences, and real stories, we see one main culprit as the number one reason marriages break up. Key Discussion Points: Understanding Apathy in Marriage The Core Issue: Hardness of Heart Indicators of a Hardened Heart The Path to Restoration and Healing Real-Life Application Resources Mentioned...
Feb 04, 2025•28 min•Season 14Ep. 316
A truly sensitive yet relatable marriage topic is what to do when you feel a lack of physical attraction to your spouse. It can be embarrassing to admit to ourselves, much less talk about it openly, but it's necessary if we want to find solutions and improve our intimacy. A listener reached out to me, sharing her struggle. She explains that despite taking care of her own appearance, her husband has gained weight, which has affected her physical attraction to him. She has moments when she can ove...
Jan 31, 2025•14 min•Season 14Ep. 315
Are you struggling to keep praying for your marriage but not seeing evidence of change? In this episode, I open up about my own journey in marriage and faith. Like so many of you, I've had to grapple with trusting in God when everything around me seemed unchanged or even worsening. My husband, Shaun, and I have been through our share of struggles, and it wasn't until I truly learned to let go and surrender my own desires that I began to see God's work in our lives. Throughout this episode, I out...
Jan 28, 2025•34 min•Season 14Ep. 314
Today’s marriage question is about relationship gift-giving and communication. After receiving an unexpected Peloton bike from her husband for Christmas instead of the spa package she desired, a listener feels hurt and confused. Essentially, she is left to wonder does my husband think I'm fat? Listen in as I provide insights and practical advice on how to interpret such gestures, manage insecurities, and communicate unspoken expectations effectively in a marriage. To read the full show notes for...
Jan 24, 2025•10 min•Season 14Ep. 313
Hard conversations are often necessary in marriage. You can be loving and truthful at the same time. However, it can be easy to forget how to balance the two in relationships. It’s no secret that marriages, like any close relationships, thrive on open and honest communication. Yet, the art of conveying truth with care often eludes us. Today, we’re diving into this intricate dance and learning how to be honest without causing harm to our spouse or significant other, further driving a wedge in our...
Jan 21, 2025•25 min•Season 14Ep. 312
Marriage is one of life's greatest teachers. What marriage teaches you, however, depends on how wise of a student you're willing to be. One of my listeners put me in the hot seat, asking, "What have you learned over the course of being married to Shaun for 25 years, and what has your marriage taught you about yourself?" I'm sharing several candid insights from my 25-year marriage journey, including: My Not-So-Pretty Self-Discovery: Marriage unveiled a side of me I never knew existed. Learn the i...
Jan 17, 2025•8 min•Season 14Ep. 311
Intimacy is often a misunderstood concept in marriage and is traditionally reduced to just sex. However, there are five different types of intimacy that can cultivate a healthier and more wholehearted marriage. Five Types of Intimacy in Marriage: 1. Spiritual Intimacy: The importance and practicality of being spiritually aligned with your spouse. 2. Emotional Intimacy: Recognizing and embracing your emotional self and providing a safe spouse for your spouse 3. Physical Intimacy: Going beyond sex...
Jan 14, 2025•28 min•Season 14Ep. 310
What do you do when your words of affirmation miss the mark? This is a concern a listener and many spouses face, especially when trying to love an "unappreciative spouse." If you’ve ever felt like your heartfelt compliments are being met with sarcasm or jabs rather than gratitude, this episode is for you. Topics We Discuss: Understanding Communication Gaps : Learn how to bridge the disconnect between expressing words of affirmation and your spouse's reception. Hear how genuine affirmations roote...
Jan 10, 2025•11 min•Season 14Ep. 309
Are you ready to transform your marriage and bring back that sense of wonder? Here’s a sneak peek into what you'll discover in this episode: - Embrace the New: We explore how the new year offers a perfect opportunity to hit the reset button on your relationship and breathe new life into your marriage. - Finding Joy in the Ordinary: Learn how noticing and appreciating the little things your spouse does can reignite wonder and admiration in your partnership. - 4 Practical Steps to Rediscover Wonde...
Jan 07, 2025•22 min•Season 14Ep. 308
I received a heartfelt question from a wife who feels underappreciated in her marriage She wants to know how to get her husband to pay more attention to her and if she needs to play hard to get to do so. Together, with thoughtful insights from my husband, Shaun, we explore practical steps to re-engage a distant spouse . . . the real way. Key Takeaways from the Episode: Discover how to effectively communicate your needs and desires in your marriage. Learn to set healthy boundaries that garner mut...
Jan 03, 2025•14 min•Season 14Ep. 307
What a year it has been! As we wrap up 2024, I can't help but reflect on all the moments that have shaped us this year. Whether you're celebrating the goals you crushed or learning from the challenges you faced, let's take a moment to acknowledge the journey. In this episode, we explored the highs and lows of the year, shared stories of triumph and growth, and looked ahead with hope for what 2025 may hold. Here's a glimpse of what we discussed: The importance of celebrating both big and small vi...
Dec 31, 2024•27 min•Season 14Ep. 306
It's a common marriage conundrum: how to deal with a messy spouse. In this episode, a listener, Sam, has been feeling overwhelmed by her husband's messiness. Newly married, she's discovering new realities of cohabitation that many of us can relate to. If you've faced similar struggles, or are facing them now, this episode is for you. Here’s a sneak peek into what we covered in the episode: Setting Boundaries : Learn how to set personal boundaries that respect both you and your spouse. It might m...
Dec 27, 2024•11 min•Season 14Ep. 305
Expectations play a vital role in shaping marriages. In part two of my conversation with Mark and Jill Savage, we explore how four expectations in marriage can set a couple up for success. Expectations will either bring two people closer together or create a rift between them. This is why it’s important to learn to manage expectations within marriage. As a marriage coach, I've had the privilege of excavating the intricacies of marriages that, at their core, are molded by the expectations we hold...
Dec 24, 2024•23 min•Season 14Ep. 304
Have you ever had suspicions that your spouse was being unfaithful? A listener, triggered by her friend's trauma with infidelity, is in a dilemma. She looked through her husband's phone and didn't like what she saw. We're discussing one of the toughest challenges any marriage can face: the breach of trust when unfaithfulness comes into play in this Q&A segment. Here's what we cover: Privacy vs. Suspicion Spotting the Red Flags: Empowering the Wounded Spouse Addressing the Infidelity Epidemic...
Dec 20, 2024•8 min•Season 14Ep. 303
When trust is broken in a marriage, many couples feel like marriage restoration is impossible and all hope is lost. However, Mark and Jill Savage’s journey reveals how marriages can heal and even thrive after infidelity. In this episode, they share their incredible testimony of a renewed marriage after a period marked by betrayal, depression, a mid-life crisis, and near-divorce. Their story offers incredible insights and encouragement for anyone who feels hopeless in their marriage. Their marria...
Dec 17, 2024•29 min•Season 14Ep. 302
