How do you reconnect emotionally in marriage when the feelings just aren't there? I’m answering this listener’s question on today’s episode. First, I just have to say how grateful I am for her transparency; I, too, have walked through seasons in my marriage where I felt disconnected. I’m sure many of you can relate to knowing the right actions to take but not feeling the emotions align with those actions. There were times when I simply didn’t want to do what I knew was right. Over the years, one...
Dec 13, 2024•11 min•Season 14Ep. 301
In our 300th episode, we’re discussing the popular yet often misunderstood topic of "Marriage Goals" and how to live united in marriage. Social media paints a picture-perfect image of what marriage goals should look like – those idyllic photos on a beach or atop a mountain with captions like #MarriageGoals. But today, we’re venturing beyond the Instagram facade to explore how you can truly create the marriage of your dreams – one that’s deeper, united, and undivided. The hashtag-ready pics may d...
Dec 10, 2024•28 min•Season 14Ep. 300
If you’ve ever felt like you’ve let yourself go or lost yourself in your marriage, this will encourage you. A listener is struggling with self-image and motivation after having three kids in five years. She feels that she has let herself go and seeks advice on how to rediscover herself and get back to feeling like her old self. Listen in for encouragement, practical steps, and a simple 4-week blueprint I share to help reignite her spark and sense of self-worth. Episode Highlights: Grace and Grat...
Dec 06, 2024•13 min•Season 14Ep. 299
Entering into marriage is undoubtedly one of the most significant decisions you'll make in your life. But it comes with a cost. With the joys of the engagement season heightened by holidays like Christmas and Valentine's Day, many find themselves caught up in the excitement of wedding planning. However, while beautiful ceremonies and Instagram-worthy moments are cherished, the essence of a marriage lies in its longevity and health. This podcast episode details nine important questions to ask bef...
Dec 03, 2024•25 min•Season 14Ep. 298
We're addressing a listener's distressing experience of financial abuse within her marriage. Despite having a stable job and a good income, her husband refuses to pay household bills and indulges in personal expenditures. This has brought about financial strain and an emotional toll. Listen as we discuss the nature of financial abuse and what she can do to "fix" her situation. Key Discussion Points: Understanding Financial Abuse: I elaborate on how financial abuse is a form of control, likened t...
Nov 29, 2024•10 min•Season 14Ep. 297
Being a peacemaker is one of the greatest qualities to have in a relationship. As the holiday season approaches, many of us are preparing to gather—whether with family, friends, or even by ourselves—and the pursuit of peace in our relationships becomes more relevant than ever. In this episode, we discuss the value of peacemaking in relationships and discuss the many differences between peacemaking and “peacefaking.” Key Topics: The Differences Between Peacemakers and Peacefakers The Importance o...
Nov 26, 2024•29 min•Season 14Ep. 296
Have you ever felt like your spouse was a shell of a person and you couldn't emotionally connect to him/her? I'm addressing a pressing concern shared by a listener and many couples - the struggle of feeling emotionally disconnected in their marriage or relationship. Many in similar situations will resonate deeply with this discussion. Episode Highlights: Create a Safe Environment: I address the importance of creating a space where couples feel safe to share their emotions. Understanding a partne...
Nov 22, 2024•12 min•Season 14Ep. 295
Can you guess the divorce rate of arranged marriages? The stats might shock you. As an Indian immigrant and an insightful storyteller, Sherene Joseph joins me to discuss the nuanced world of arranged marriages. We’re debunking some common myths and exploring the profound impact of family involvement on choosing spouses, providing listeners with valuable relationship advice that transcends cultural and modern marriage boundaries. Key Discussion Points: Intentional Parenting: Emphasizing how paren...
Nov 19, 2024•41 min•Season 14Ep. 294
One listener feels overwhelmed by marriage problems and doesn’t know where or how to start addressing them. In today’s episode, we will discuss how to identify and prioritize marriage issues more effectively. Knowing where to focus can be challenging. How do you tackle your marriage problems without feeling buried under them all? Shaun is also here to give his take and offer guidance on finding patience and purpose amidst the turmoil. Key Discussion Points: Finding Personal Purpose: the importan...
Nov 15, 2024•9 min•Season 14Ep. 293
We've all heard it said—marriage is hard. But what about marriage is so hard? Specifically, what is about your marriage that makes it hard work? In this episode, I’m sharing five reasons your marriage may be harder than it should be. Also, can we reframe that belief? What if instead of seeing marriage as hard work, we saw it as heart work? Key Points : Changing Your Perspective on Marriage Reframe the mindset from "marriage is hard work" to "marriage is heart work." Commit to becoming more resil...
Nov 12, 2024•27 min•Season 14Ep. 292
A husband is seeking advice on how to communicate to his wife that her nurturing behavior sometimes feels smothering and he needs space. They have been together since high school and married for three years. In this episode, we discuss compassionate and clear ways to communicate when you need to tell your spouse something that may be hard to hear. Key Points Discussed: Understanding the Source Smothering Behavior Identifying the Love Languages of Your Spouse Encouraging Personal Space Without Di...
Nov 09, 2024•9 min•Season 14Ep. 291
We all want lives of meaning. But building your life and relationships on a solid foundation is more complex than simply desire. This topic hits home for pretty much all of us—whether you're hustling in the business world, running after little ones at home, or working a 9-to-5. We all need to pause and ask: What am I living for, really? I reflect on a time I spoke at a business leaders conference; I spoke about the need to shift our focus from simply achieving success as per worldly standards to...
Nov 05, 2024•29 min•Season 14Ep. 290
When you're best friends with both halves of a splitting couple, as listener Sherry is, things can get messy. Divorce is one of those life events that not only impacts the couple involved but also sends ripples through their connected circle of friends and family. So how do you show love and support without finding yourself stuck in the middle, or worse, causing unintended strains on your relationships and own marriage? In this episode, we dive into these questions and explore ways to maintain h...
Nov 01, 2024•9 min•Season 14Ep. 289
In marriage and relationships, it’s crucial to understand how to build resilient relationships. Resilience isn’t about never facing challenges; it’s about facing them, growing through them, and becoming better because of them. Not everyone who faces hardship in relationships develops resilience; many become bitter and disillusioned. Having been married for 25 years, my husband Shaun and I have faced numerous marriage problems. From infidelity and financial crises to family losses and parenting s...
Oct 29, 2024•29 min•Season 14Ep. 288
Chris, a husband of three years, is seeking advice on managing his friendships while maintaining harmony in his marriage. He shares his struggle with balancing time spent with friends and his wife's apparent displeasure with it. In this episode, we discuss what to do when your spouse has trust issues, the important balance between friendships and marital commitments, and other practical advice for couples facing similar situations. Key Points Discussed: Trust Issues Healthy Friendships in Marria...
Oct 25, 2024•8 min•Season 14Ep. 287
Life is busy! Now more than ever is the time to stay connected as a couple. Shaun is back on the podcast and we’re discussing how to maintain a strong connection as a couple in the midst of busy schedules and seasons. Whether you’re juggling careers, family, life changes, or personal growth, listen as we share insights we’ve learned (and are in the process of learning) on effective communication, finding moments of quality time, and appreciating your current season of life, no matter how busy li...
Oct 22, 2024•21 min•Season 14Ep. 286
I received a heartfelt email from a listener struggling with the aftermath of his wife’s affair. His words resonated with me, and I found myself reflecting on my own journey through such tumultuous times. In this episode, I share some insights, offering guidance and support for anyone walking this difficult path, including: Understanding the Aftermath The Importance of Time and Patience Avoid Triggering Media Forgiveness Goes Both Ways Turning Your Sorrow to Prayer If you or someone you know is ...
Oct 18, 2024•9 min•Season 14Ep. 285
Emotional affairs are entanglements that can quietly wreak havoc on marriages, so understanding and addressing them is critical for rebuilding trust and intimacy in our relationships. Too many couples allow unmet desires or longings to be fulfilled in other people and, as a result, introduce dysfunction in their marriages. Rebuilding trust after an emotional affair is possible, but first, let’s dismantle how these breaches in trust happen in the first place. We’re talking about the who, what, wh...
Oct 15, 2024•30 min•Season 14Ep. 284
Have you ever felt an unexpected attraction towards someone who should be off-limits, like a friend's spouse? In today's episode, we answer a listener's dilemma about finding herself attracted to her best friend's husband—all while she's navigating a rocky marriage of her own. In this episode, I'll walk through steps on how to handle these sensitive situations without jeopardizing friendships and marriages. We'll discuss: Understanding the nature of attraction, and why it's not inherently wrong....
Oct 11, 2024•8 min•Season 14Ep. 283
Are you a wife who feels overwhelmed and exhausted? If you're a busy woman trying to juggle multiple roles, you’re not alone. In this episode, we dive deep into the burnout epidemic affecting many women (especially wives) today. In "Burnout of the Busy Wife," I share my personal journey and provide invaluable insights on how to detect and combat burnout effectively. Let’s unpack the differences between stress and burnout. I not only share personal experiences but also provide actionable steps to...
Oct 08, 2024•31 min•Season 14Ep. 282
In today’s Q&A episode, I’m addressing a relatable question from Shannon, a listener who feels that her “decent” marriage could use a change, but she doesn’t want to sound like she’s complaining to her husband. After twelve years of marriage and three kids, Shannon is eager to reignite the spark in her marriage but finds communication challenging when her husband perceives her concerns as complaints. Here’s the marriage advice I give Shannon broken into three main parts that include identify...
Oct 04, 2024•8 min•Season 14Ep. 281
If you've ever struggled to forgive, you'll find the hope and help you're looking for in one of my most inspirational episodes yet. It's time you find the will to forgive and, in the process, find yourself again. When I was healing from infidelity, I found it difficult to lay down my need to be justified and have my pain validated. Because of this, I kept myself stuck in a cycle of pain, bitterness, and unforgiveness. But when I learned how to release the pain, I realized peace and true joy were...
Oct 01, 2024•23 min•Season 14Ep. 280
Allison, a listener who's torn between her husband and her family of origin, wrote to ask my advice on navigating how to honor her marriage while also honoring her family, as her husband "hates" the family she grew up with. Because of past family trauma, Allison was estranged from her parents when she and her husband married. She has since reconciled with them, but her husband's not on board. Listen as I share relationship advice about how to avoid becoming a defacto mediator between the two. If...
Sep 27, 2024•11 min•Season 14Ep. 279
Should you divulge every detail of your life to your spouse or keep certain things in the pocket? Let's talk about the importance of openness, trust, and friendship in a healthy marriage. Marriage is a beautiful journey of mutual love, trust, and companionship. However, whether we should tell our spouse everything often looms large. Are secrets always a bad thing? In this episode, you’ll hear insights and actionable tips for building a more intimate and honest relationship with your spouse. Key ...
Sep 24, 2024•27 min•Season 14Ep. 278
Dating your spouse is oh-so-important, but what if your finances are on the struggle bus? I'm sharing four budget-friendly getaway ideas you'll want to try in your marriage. All of these tips are an invitation to the adventure of consistently dating your spouse . . . for a longer time stint. No money? No problem. Listen as I share some tips on how you can utilize the people in your circle to plan creative ideas for spending time with the one you love. Want to submit a relationship question for t...
Sep 20, 2024•10 min•Season 14Ep. 277
Do you ever feel like your relationship is running on a treadmill? Moving, but not really getting anywhere? It’s a common concern, whether it’s in a marriage, a long-standing friendship, or a new romantic relationship. Sometimes, the stagnation can make you question the viability of your connection. But don't worry—your relationship isn’t doomed. In fact, every relationship experiences hills, valleys, peaks, and stop points. In this episode, we’ll explore five reasons your relationship is stuck....
Sep 17, 2024•27 min•Season 14Ep. 276
It can be a complicated adjustment when a marriage ends in divorce. How soon is too soon to "get out there?" A listener asked if it's too soon to date after divorce and how to know when it's the right time. I share my thoughts on determining the right time and process to dating after divorce, including ensuring the marriage that ended is left in the best condition possible before beginning a new relationship. Links Mentioned in this Episode: Ep. 224 - Releasing the Weight of Relationship Baggage...
Sep 13, 2024•9 min•Season 13Ep. 275
We’re telling the truth about lying in today’s episode. It's an oxymoron, isn’t it? For most people, lying is a behavior learned in childhood and, unfortunately, carries into adulthood. From telling white lies to avoid minor inconveniences to engaging in more elaborate fabrications to protect ourselves, lying has become an almost reflexive coping mechanism. But make no mistake; lying is a form of betrayal that sows distrust , instability, and insecurity in any relationship. But why do we lie? Wh...
Sep 10, 2024•25 min•Season 13Ep. 274
Do you have a strong-willed child that makes parenting hard at times? Today, a listener wants to know how she can get through to her strong-willed, stubborn child while keeping her love on. I can relate to this mom because all four of my children are strong-willed. My mom says they get it from their mama, but I have no idea what she's talking about. Listen in as I share some helpful encouragement, parenting advice, and resources to help you parents who feel you're on the struggle bus of parentin...
Sep 06, 2024•11 min•Season 13Ep. 273
Have you been around someone or do you struggle with having a critical spirit? We all need to be challenged sometimes, but criticism is rarely ever helpful. What is the difference between criticism and feedback and how can you cultivate an honest, authentic relationship that isn’t conflict-avoidant but one that values kindness even in the “critique?” This conversation will help you to reframe and readdress conflict in a more healthy, helpful way. Key Points: Intention Matters Tone and Specificit...
Sep 03, 2024•27 min•Season 13Ep. 272
