¶ Lipidema and Overcoming Self-Limitations
Welcome back to the Pure Possibilities podcast . Today we are chatting with my dear friend , heidi . She is a fellow health coach and also a mentor of mine . She is the mama to four special needs kids .
She also has lipidema , which is a connective tissue disorder that I don't know , that many people know much about , and she shares a lot of information about that , which I found incredibly informative , and she's also launching a podcast in the next couple weeks called own your grit , so I hope you enjoy today's episode .
Thank you so much for joining us today , heidi . I'm excited .
How are you , hey girl ? I am so excited to be here and I'm doing wonderfully . Thank you so much for asking . How about you ? Fantastic .
So one of the things that I love to ask people is what is your favorite quote or saying that you like to live by ?
That's so great . It's a really good question , and the first one that comes to my mind when you ask me is you only live once , but if you live right , once is enough .
Oh , I love that .
I know it can like spring into so many different conversations , but it's like about probably living life to the fullest for me , versus living right or versus wrong , because I don't feel like that's a good statement , like a one that has enough quantification , you know . But just living to the fullest , then you're good . See who you are ?
Yeah , what does that mean for you ? Yeah , so what I've discovered in my years , my adult years , which aren't that many , I'm so young and great . Yes , you are .
But what I learned ?
is that I have a lot of things holding you back , a lot of things that I didn't count on holding me back in life , whether that was having four special needs kids , I feel like I was being held back from being my truest self , the most I could be or what I could be , started to be limited because I was so absorbed in what I had going on .
But by the same token , if you will , I I was always plain small , because I was trying to fit in small spaces , because I grew up very overweight and I didn't want to take up more space than an average size individual or I would be made fun of for being larger and I didn't want that .
So making sure my towel only took half or less of half than the towel rack . So I'm gonna be like her towel takes up so much space because she needs a big towel , because she's big .
I don't know what people were thinking , but in my mind I thought it all for them and it made me play small and stay in smaller spaces and love small , tiny , little sample things because they were small and cute and that's what I wanted . To be Sad huh .
It's sad , but it's .
It's interesting how you related your personal size to being small in so many areas and like pulling yourself back and holding yourself back in that way rather than expanding and shining your light and being yeah , yeah , exactly , I had no idea I was doing it with subconscious , not not always intentional , right , yeah , and I didn't know that .
Taking up less space , trying to shrink to fit in those small spaces where my booty didn't really belong , you know , like just making it work instead of showing up like who I was right or contending for myself in those moments too , so where was the shift ?
when did the shift happen , where you , I guess , first of all realized that that was the mindset that you were in ? Where did that shift happen for you ?
Yeah , so I want to relate . I don't know 100% where I started to grab that because I lived in that scarcity mindset and the diet mentality since I was always doing that throughout my life .
But what I did is when I discovered that I had lipidema , this connective tissue disorder , kind of like an autoimmune disorder , in that my body attacks itself , but it's not considered autoimmune .
When I discovered I had that going on , it was like a huge awakening to me and I mean there's a lot of different ways I could describe lipidema , but a long story short is my arteries and blood vessels are extra flexible and so they leak into my body and that protein , that blood going into my body outside of my veins . It doesn't be long there .
So my body attacks it and it's trying to defend itself . So it's creating like nodules and lumps , very firm , hard nodules and lumps that are painful .
So it hurt to walk , it hurt to run , it hurts to if somebody try goes up and tries to like grab my arm or poke , poke me like hey , you know , and get my attention , or my kids sometimes they'll lay on my lap and then they go to get up and their little elbow like digs on my leg and I'm like , oh right , it's very painful , but what I learned when I
had that is that lipidema doesn't come off your body through nutrition or through exercise , and that's what I've been doing my whole life to try and remove it . I didn't know I had it , so once I learned that it was awakening and and wonderful .
But it was also sad like I used the word sad a little while ago and I'm relating it again right now , just because I here , I've been trying to small myself and it really wasn't possible , you know , and I didn't know that , and so I was trying to be what everybody expected me to be , which was smaller , and it really wasn't my reality .
I couldn't , it wasn't even my fault . Here I am living , diet to diet , trying to be smaller so that I'm more acceptable to others . I don't know when I audition for the show I might get the lead role because I fit the part better when I'm thin or average .
Or maybe I want to go to see a concert and you have to sit in these stadium seats and my butt needs to fit in there . I didn't realize , by not fitting in , that I was standing out and being myself . In a way , I was trying to conform and fit into a small space , because that's what people are supposed to do .
I didn't have to because this wasn't my fault . Do I love it ? No , do I want the lipidema off my body ? Yeah , but it's genetic , hereditary and irreversible . I was trapped and stuck . Even the people closest to me didn't really understand what that means . Yet they still don't entirely , because they'll still say hey , you want to go exercise with me ?
As if that's going to help me with my struggle of weight , or the growing up part . Hey , maybe you don't need seconds . Or everyone else is going to have a big bowl of ice cream . It's like setting me up for this , my mom . Everyone else is going to have a big bowl of ice cream , but I'm going to make yours very small .
I just wanted you to know so that you don't get upset . I'm like these are moments in my life that I thought were all my fault . I was shrinking the size of my meal or the size of my personality so that people didn't notice me because I was too big .
Yeah , that must have been really difficult . I mean , I think a lot of people are guilty of that and just passing judgment , looking at somebody based off of their size or whatever and not obviously knowing , and you growing up having no idea that you actually had something physically going on within your body that was completely out of your control .
So can you tell us a little more about , like , if you were to go back ? So you said you kind of went through several diets and did different things like that . What was the timeframe from when did you realize and get the lipidema diagnosis ?
So lipidema diagnosis came later in my life , around 2020 , right near the COVID era which made it a little difficult to get any care or treatment or assistance from doctors , specifically because here in the United States the doctors don't know about it yet . Some do . You have to find those ones . Otherwise , you are educating the doctors and that's okay .
I'm happy to educate . But they have this doubt in their mind and they want to write it off as obesity because it's what they know Like . Well , lose weight and you'll feel better . Lose weight and your knees won't hurt . While that is very true , if you get weight off your knees they're going to hurt less that weight wasn't going to magically come off .
Now that weight , overweightness can come off , but not lipidema weight .
So getting that diagnosis helped me realize that there's a certain point when I was losing weight that my body kind of bottoms out , and it wasn't my goal weight , but my body just didn't ever go lower than that , and so I learned that that's kind of where my goal weight would be when the lipidema portion wouldn't come off .
But where lipidema started to show itself in my life although I didn't know it was a diagnosis was as a young girl , probably around nine or 10 years old . It's kind of that era of puberty beginning , because that's where your hormones begin to shift and it's hormone related .
So that's where I started to have heavier legs and glutes and belly and arms and those are the areas for my body where lipidema shows up . And it was harder when we do the jogathon in elementary school or play the sports or even in high school when we'd run the mile . I remember I would run the whole mile . Well , jog , I couldn't run .
Well , my face would red , it would just go so red except the little white area around my nose and mouth where I breathed like foot breath and I would run my heart out so that I wouldn't be last . Because if I was last I'd be made
¶ Living With Lipidema and Embracing Self-Acceptance
by now and I would barely make it , even though I ran , jogged the whole way . I would barely make it in front of those , like girls , who didn't dress out but were made to walk anyway . Yeah , right , yeah , my legs were heavy , they were heavier than normal and I'm 10 degrees hotter than everyone else because of lipidema .
So I would be exhausted and I prayed and wished that I had asthma so I could get an excuse not to have to run that mile . You know , I don't have asthma , I'm great , I'm healthy . I just have a lot of weight that I have to carry that I can't do anything about , and that isn't even my fault , and that's kind of what life looks like .
And then , with the birth of each child , lipidema worsened . Those were hormone change moments . Birth control affects lipidema , so there's that . And when I get to the age of menopause , there's that as well . These kind of moments .
The big moments that happen at any time , like normally , then they're even more elevated . For you , it sounds like it is .
Yeah , and then I learned sometimes when I'm working out , Like if , because working out was a huge part of trying to be healthy and lose weight more lose weight than be healthy I didn't even know what the healthy meant . I just knew I wasn't skinny , right , and now I know , but growing up I had no idea .
So I'd be at the gym working out and running this mile , trying to run the whole thing , because I knew if I kept my own pace I could run without stopping Because I had that stamina and that health . It was heavy it's like wearing ankle weights or something or carrying gallons of milk around and running .
But what happened is I guess I might've just lost my thought in this process of trying to explain everything , but it was I didn't want to stand out for being overweight , I wanted to match , so I'd run the whole thing because then maybe they couldn't make fun of me for walking because I was too tired or because of whatever .
Honestly , I wasn't made fun of all the time , but I lived in fear of it because I was made fun of a lot , you know , and I didn't want that . I wanted to be cool and happy and fun and I was those things , but I feel like I had to like fight for that instead of just being naturally doing it , yeah , and putting up .
I'm gonna anticipate that this is how people are gonna treat me and so I'm going to make those decisions , to put myself out there so that they proactively , so they can't do that .
Yeah , because I judged myself before they ever could , so that when they did , I wouldn't feel as bad , right , yeah , and truth is another thing I learned in the process is that , hey , judging someone else for maybe judging me was judging them Like I was judging them right , right , so I was also judging myself for them and those judgments and those ways of
thinking that's maybe culture created I had to step away from , to let my life be the one I live , right , and not trying to live the life that everyone expects me to have , thin or otherwise . Right , I wanna just be me , if that's okay with everyone else , yeah , I'm gonna be me . I can't help it , you know .
Yeah , and allowing people the opportunity to formulate their own . Like when we put up those blocks , like we're not even letting people , we're not even giving people the opportunity to get to know who we really are , because we've decided for them who they think we are without even opening ourselves up to letting them get to know us .
Yeah , I think maybe you've done that before , because you just explained it so well .
I might have a little bit of experience with that .
That's so great . Yeah , it's interesting because people do that . You know why ? Why do we wanna fit in ? Because the minute we fit in , we're no longer ourselves , yeah , we're no longer standing out brightly right .
And so I think these are some of the moments I learned through and along the way is that if I was lighthearted and happy and fun , then people would be drawn to me , despite my size , right .
And then later I learned okay , size is irrelevant , I'm just gonna be my bright , happy , fun self and they can be drawn to me if they want to , and if they don't , that's on them . You know , that's maybe we're not each other's people , that's okay . I'm not for everyone , but I love being for everyone .
You know , like I think we all secretly want that , and then I just had to learn that it didn't matter , I'm okay .
And I'm more okay when I'm being true to myself , which it took a long time to figure out some of those pieces , just because I think that's what happens when you it doesn't have to be weight , but when you live in a space of feeling not good enough , you're fighting to be good enough , right .
So the question is good enough for who ? I think usually it comes back to not necessarily other people's judgments of us . It's whether we feel like we're good enough and then we've decided it's such a crazy thing because then it's the way I see it is we're looking at it . Am I good enough for you ?
But yet I'm not gonna allow you to even have an opinion because I'm gonna decide for you , Yep .
Isn't that a little bit ?
messed up Like that we talked about .
That's what we're talking about . That's exactly what we did , and you know what . Some of that is put on us by the culture we grow up in or that we're around , and a lot of that in my world was put on me by the doctors . You know Like lose weight , you'll feel better . You're not at a healthy weight .
Your numbers look like this , you know , or whatever you need to lose this many pounds . Here's the number for nutritionist . Here's da , da , da , da , da . And I'm like , when I go to the gym and do a workout now I know what I didn't know then it just causes more leaking , more leaking of my veins . It's not good for my body right At this stage .
So that's unfortunate and I have to take it easy more than I have to work out . If I get off my feet and stay off them for three days , I'll probably lose four pounds .
You know , like , right , just doing nothing but getting off my feet , because it takes some of the weight and the pressure and the , the , the energy that our body puts into Feeling okay , relieving the pain that I'm experiencing . Like when your body's fighting so much physical pain , it's under a huge stress that causes weight gain .
So I have to learn to take it easy and go with the flow and sometimes say no , right , and I wasn't good at saying no either .
You know want to do all the things , make all people happy , so they all love me right and allow yourself that , give yourself that permission to rest , and that it doesn't mean people aren't gonna like you or want to be around you , just because you need to do what's best for you . Yeah . I mean who wouldn't want ?
to be around me . You know , You're frickin amazing . You are the brightest light .
Let's talk a little bit about that we , so we met through the health coaching community , like four years ago , yeah , and so how did you end up ? How did you get into health coaching ?
Okay . So I feel like in one way , I was health coaching all my life because I Been dieting since I was a little girl and I knew how to help people lose weight .
Honestly , I helped a lot of people lose weight in their lives before I ever become a health coach and I coached several people and small groups , like within my church and stuff like that , because I had a really good skill set at Encouraging people and sometimes that's all people need .
Yeah , right , and it wasn't about the diet necessarily meaning you can , you can eat . It's not usually about what's going in our mouth that's causing weight struggles . It's about what's going on in our mind , usually not in our mouth , and what goes on in our mind and our emotions is sometimes what goes into our mouth . So that's why it's relevant .
What we eat or how we feel or the stress on our body , like I was talking about , any a Number of things can cause weight gain . So I had lost over a hundred pounds or different times in my adult years . Losing weight wasn't hard to do . It was keeping it off .
Once I got to a lower number , but never to my goal weight because of the lipidema weight you know so Well .
I started losing weight through the programming coach and I got to To a place where people were noticing and really wanted my help , like all over again , you know , and so I couldn't say no , because they were actually my friends , asking me for help and I love helping people and it didn't matter If I was busy , because I wanted to share this with them .
I Looks like I couldn't hold it back . Kind of like my Jesus , you know , I was like I love him .
I can't help but talk about him . You know like he's done so much for me .
And that's how I felt about this . Program like this has made it so simple and convenient for me to do While handling my four special needs kids and their 20 appointments each week .
You know , I didn't even know I had lipidema yet at this time and I lost over 130 pounds following the program and that was phenomenal and it was a gift and so , yeah , I was helping hundreds of people as I got into that more and I still am , because it's so beautiful watching people reach their goals and Feel finally free of a huge burden , right .
So that was nice . And it wasn't all about weight loss . Like I was saying , it was about a lot that was going on in their minds and this sometimes food addiction or sometimes Social eating , not knowing how to navigate certain situations to better their health . That's gonna how I got involved in . That is just because people were watching my transformation .
When you lose weight , even if you're not at your goal weight , you tend to feel better and have more confidence , and that sure happens for me , you know .
Oh . Yeah , I completely understand that . I mean , when I got involved and , you know , started obviously my health journey and then my coaching , I was so surprised at the mindset shifts that happened . I mean , obviously , yes , losing , losing weight , is incredible , but I was surprised , I did not expect , I didn't expect that at all .
And so , helping people really work through those mindset
¶ Transforming Lives Through Coaching
shifts and how we do turn to addictive behaviors , to , I would say , suppress and Not deal , really not deal with whatever's going on , so we go to these things that are gonna give us that momentary satisfaction , rather than sitting in that discomfort of working through whatever the thing , whatever that thing is that we're trying to avoid an escape crazy , right .
Yeah , I mean you speak it so well , shannon like the word suppress we do , we push down so much just to function .
Yeah , and I think that when we are able to bring some of those things up and Work through them instead of jump over them or push them down to get through the pathway or whatever we're doing , yeah , um , it's when you're you're truer , health comes and you're your freedom right , freedom from what's holding you back and pulling you down , and that's a gift .
And I honestly , in my personal health journey , didn't find as much of that as I did through coaching and helping others . That's when I really started transforming more and that's when I really Like losing weight changed my life . Yes , but I'd done it before .
So this was just a diet or a means to an end , but when I found it , it was a lifestyle and that there was so much more in it than just losing weight and I started helping other people and helping them overcome these huge obstacles and kind of guiding them through it . They're self taught .
I'm just there guiding them , you know , like we're just coaching , but but that's when I started to transform . That's when I started to really dig in To make sure I had what I needed to help them through that , and that was a gift I don't know , because I lacked I still lacked the big love for myself that I needed at that time .
So I wouldn't or didn't whether I would have , I don't know but I didn't do for myself all of the right , all of the coaching , but once I started helping others , I then did for myself so I could help them , you see , but just to help me . I wasn't there yet and thankfully I am now .
But it took a while to be okay in my own skin , because it was like I lived in a body that's not mine , right ?
Yeah , well , and I think that sometimes you know we we talk about in the coaching world a lot . You know what is your why and it needs to be deep and it needs to . You need to really be able to connect with that . But sometimes we're not in a space where our why , where we feel like our why , can be about us .
So if we make it about somebody else but then it eventually it is incredible how it does come back .
It comes back to you and I don't know about you , but I find when I'm I'm on a call with a client and we're having a conversation and what's coming out of my mouth is like not only something that they are obviously needing in that moment , it's also something that I needed . Yeah , does that happen for you ?
Because that has blown my you know , I was like what ? Yeah , like the personal growth to that comes with the coaching is is crazy it was like I didn't even know I needed this in my life until I it was here .
Yeah , isn't that beautiful . Yeah , it's why I often like , when , when , when clients choose to like coach and help their friends , and I'm like , yes , like this is where your world changes , not just your life , you know . Like , yes , your transformation is great .
But like , well , you ready for this Because so much is ahead for you and there's just a beauty in it and ownership is when you start to really own your own journey because you realize that it's impacting other people or inspiring them and everybody I don't know if everybody wants to inspire other people , but I sure did and so that I was doing something that
inspired others or impacted them in a way that that made them want to shift and become more . That was like a God given gift . Like I didn't know I needed that . You know , I didn't know I needed to experience and feel those things . It is kind of like with my special needs kids . I had no idea that I needed that but , man , they teach me so much .
I grow so much by parenting them and giving them the best I can . It it's challenging to me , you know it is . It does challenge everything I'm going to do and how and why and where it's coming from , and you know I'm . I'm assessing everything about it because the way their minds operate is so brilliant , it's so gifted . I don't want to mess it up .
I mean , god's got big plans , right , yeah , so I love that , like I didn't even know I needed that .
When they were . They were brought to you to help you learn whatever you're meant to learn and teach you all those beautiful things .
Yeah , yeah , and and and .
On the other side of it , coaching fulfilled this need , this personal need that I didn't know I had also , where I was all of the sudden able to step out of that special needs world Once I tucked the kid in bed and I could go and have a conversation on the phone with my friend , like an adult conversation , where I felt appreciated , needed and heard and vice
versa , and I think it filled that part of me that I wasn't necessarily getting in my raising the children mode and vice versa . It filled them with a human interaction and I feel like that got that in our world that was getting less and less because of social media and work and parenting and all the things kids do nowadays .
And you're driving everywhere you know , like life , life , life's taken us away from relationships , and I still needed that in my world , so I love that I got this right .
It's totally a form of self care . I mean , when we're you know , you're obviously giving and giving and giving to your , to your amazing children , and then you're able to step back and take some of that time to fill your own cup so that you're you can overflow , so you have something to give to them For sure .
Yeah , sure , what do you ? What do you do ?
What's your favorite thing to do for self care other than , obviously , connecting with people ?
Oh my gosh , Easy answer Ready . Yeah , I love it . I never knew how much I needed them . Okay , or maybe I secretly did , but just when I started coaching and I had like this extra income coming in that I didn't plan on .
Yeah , it allowed me a couple of things One to hire help with my kids , like someone to come in the afternoon to help us navigate the difficulty of them coming off their medicine and getting homework done , and this and that and the other .
But it also gave me this extra money that I could do my lashes and it saved me like I don't know , because my lashes are blonde , so it saved me like 15 minutes of like putting a coat on , letting it dry , putting the next coat on you know what I mean and like and then it flaking off under my face throughout the day .
I have it of like brushing under my eyes just in case there was going to be flakes there or something you know like . So getting lashes like it saved me time in the morning from like getting ready , and then I would wake up and I already felt like so freaking gorgeous because my lashes look great . You know , like I didn't know I needed them .
It is the best self care . It's like you get to spend an hour every few weeks and chat with a friend you know so .
I love it . No , that's fine , I love that .
See easy answer .
Yeah , you know , self-care is definitely so important . You know , just finding those little moments of things that we can do for ourselves .
And you know , sometimes it is , you know , hair and nails and lashes , and then other times it's just connecting with our friends and you know , or going for a walk or whatever whatever makes us feel good , whatever makes us feel good , yep .
Yeah , and it can cost no money .
But I know that , like , oh , some of my clients , but you , for example , like buying flowers for yourself or arranging something beautiful , like that fills something for us , you know like I just created , you know , and if , when it fills your soul in such a way , you know self-care , you know like I feel good when I do that .
So yeah , no , it's good . Yeah , I love flower ranging .
You know that it's something , because I originally started buying myself flowers because I was like you know , I had been out of a relationship and I'm like I don't need somebody to buy me flowers , I'm going to buy them for myself , and so I always you know , I started to just always have flowers and then I learned how to do arranging and now it just brings
me so much joy to put the arrangements together and it's just , it's a fun , it's a fun thing to do that brings me so much .
You know what . It reminds me of a song . I'm just kidding , this is really going to sound funny , but to my husband he's really good , very , very analytical . And so , like it's her birthday , she gets flowers . It's Valentine's , I bring flowers . Some others say I bring flowers . You know , like he knows , and then randomly he'll just bring flowers .
And here's a tip he gets them at Costco because they last longer , they're fresher there , and he reaches in the back and finds a good bouquet , not one from the front , one that's more cold and been in there shorter time . So he's really smart about his flower shopping . So there's a fun tip for you .
And then I totally did that before Thanksgiving when I was at Costco . Perfect .
Yeah .
And I totally reached to the back because I'm like it's probably a little more fresh .
Yes , see , you're so smart . And then there's other thing . I told him because I'm I'm not opposite as you , but I am a little in this regard as I was like , please bring on flowers that are already arranged . Every time you bring flowers it's with a load of groceries . I'm working , working , working .
I don't have time to sit and cut flowers and put them in water , like , just get them in a vase already arranged for me . And now we're 14 , 15 years in our marriage , or whatever . And last time he got any flowers , he brought them in a vase and with a big smile on his face because he knew he was doing a good thing , you know .
And I was like , oh , thank you , honey , you made my day . These flowers are amazing .
You didn't bring me a job to do , which I didn't mean to sound ungrateful , but you know , my world was a bit chaotic between everything and it was just sometimes another thing to do and it made me feel not grateful for the flowers , but I bet you , given that same bouquet , would be like ah , thank you so much , I can arrange , you know , and that's because
our lives look different , but , like man , I'm just a gift to just have flowers . You know , in the first place , and so I'm always that person that's going to find the positive spin on it , right ? So I I'm so grateful to have somebody bringing me flowers and I don't have to buy them . But kind of kind of I did a little . We shared income , yeah
¶ Flowers, Love Languages, and Self-Acceptance
, that's true , but it's nice to have somebody thinking of you , so that's cool , right ? Yeah , absolutely .
Absolutely .
So , funny . That was so funny that I'm like please bring them arranged . I don't want a job to do so everybody's love language is completely different .
It's like it's true , you know , and the things that are going to bring you joy aren't going to be , aren't the things that you know . That's part of the beauty of our uniqueness and how we stand out in our own , in our own beautiful way .
And I love arranging . Actually , I just didn't have the time . My mom used to arrange beautiful vocays . She did my wedding flowers like she was flower woman , you know , oh , wow , that's incredible . So I do , I love arranging and I'll make corsages when it's like prom and people are , you know . Hey , can you help us with flowers ?
Like yeah , I love it , but it takes time and energy and I just didn't have it Right . So , anyway , ok , that was no , but he did a great job of like meeting you where you were at you know and being open and listening to that yeah . And it costs more that way .
So that's part of why you didn't , because he's a finance guy , right , right , so , like you want to bring me real joy , bring me a birthday present . I don't have to put together , like I don't have to assemble or whatever . Well , it was just so cute , him coming in with that big smile , like look what I got you .
Yeah , and and I know you can picture that at , anyone can imagine it if you know him but , right , yeah , Like , give the guys some credit .
He really did a good job that time , so so , what is one piece of advice that you would give to your younger self ?
So this is a really good one , because I just spent time in London with my daughter and I watched her trying so hard to fit in but so hard to be herself at the same time . She doesn't have a weight struggle right now . I add , right now , because Lipidema is her editor .
Like she may also have it , but right now it's not a thing , she is happy , she wants to be on the trampoline , she loves dancing , she's , she's not in pain , okay , so that's beautiful . What I saw her doing was this this trying to fit in bit and Without the weight struggle , still trying to go small because people don't love her big personality .
And I think her big personality is because she's tiny . She's small for her age . So the louder she can be , the more like she gets attention . And I don't want her to have to fight for attention . I want her to just be herself and those who will see will hear , you know , those who will want that will catch it .
And that's a bit of the advice I would give myself is you don't have to fit in . You're not trying to meet or match a mold . You know there is no cookie cutter , heidi . Right , you are becoming as you go and so own who you are , and if there's something you're not , you're not okay with about yourself Personally , develop and grow , you know .
But if it's somebody else looking on you and giving you this mold that you need to fit in , then walk away , right . You don't have to match anyone's opinion of how you should be . You need to become who you want to be , and so don't let the weight of the world make your decisions .
Don't let the bullying or teasing of another child guide how you behave like , be you and find the places that are safe for you to be . So you know absolutely . I love that . That is absolutely beautiful . Thank you , heidi .
Thank you so much , yes , for hanging out with us today . Love you , girl . Love you too . Thanks for the fun . Have a good day , thank you .
You too , thank you .