Are You Suppressed or Fully Self Expressed?

And then something else came up that I felt like was a little more important right now , and so we're going to talk about feelings and emotions and suppression versus expression . I have spent most of my life suppressing my feelings , and it was certainly unintentional . Do you know what I mean ?

Like growing up , I didn't feel safe to necessarily express my thoughts and feelings about things . And then I went into customer service and I've been in customer service for over 30 years and in that line of work , you put on this face and have to suppress your feelings most of the time . Have to suppress your feelings most of the time .

Honestly , one time my son came into my work and we were having a quick conversation and then I stepped away to help somebody and I came back and he was like what was that ? I was like what do you mean ? That's my customer service voice , and he was like I don't even know what that voice is .

So you know , it's interesting how we go through life , being different people in different spaces and really holding in our feelings and emotions . So I've had some things going on over the last I don't know several weeks , like there's always something going on right .

But I've had some things going on over the last I don't know several weeks , like there's always something going on right . But I've had some things that you know whether it's been in relationships , some of my own thoughts and feelings , with goals of some things that I wanted to accomplish that haven't quite happened yet .

And so Saturday , I don't know I was feeling a little bit off . I was at work , it was a fine day , like nothing exciting was going on , and then , as I was driving home , I started to feel let me back up a little bit .

So during the day , I had a thought come into my mind and it just was you're not exactly where you want to be , but you're exactly where you're meant to be . I was like , okay , I can like that's good . Apparently , I needed that reminder because it popped into my head . So I was like , okay , I can like that's good .

Apparently , I needed that reminder because it popped into my head . So I was driving home and I started to feel yucky , just like this , really tight and stricted . I don't feel good feeling . I came home I went straight to my bedroom . I tossed my things on the floor . I think I took off my clothes .

I tossed my things on the floor , I think I took off my clothes . I got in bed and I cried and I cried and I cried and I screamed into my pillow and it was like a full on feel the fuck out of your feelings kind of moment . It was nothing I ever do is good enough . Why can't I do this ? And I can't even remember everything now .

But it was just this full on . You know those thoughts that just come into your head that you don't have to believe . You don't have to believe everything that you think . But it was happening Like it was . It was pretty intense and I just screamed and cried and then I think I fell asleep for a few minutes because I just needed to get that out .

And then I got out of bed , went into the living room , decided I was going to watch a movie , made myself some popcorn , got cozy on my couch and watched . There was a new Netflix movie with Zac Efron , who I absolutely love .

Zac Efron and Nicole Kidman called A Family Affair , sat down , watched that laughed , got a little bit teary in some spots , and then at the end there was a line where they said the end is none of my business , the end is none of my business , and I was like that's exactly what I needed to hear .

It's none of my business , everything is going to unfold as magically and beautiful as it's meant to and it's none of my business how that happens .

So I just thought it was important to talk about expression versus suppression and you know , I could come on here and act like everything is fine and perfect in my life and honestly , that's kind of the way I used to unintentionally represent myself . What do people think if you're not living this perfect life ?

Well , I am now in a space where my goal is not perfection . My goal is inner happiness and peace and joy and really loving my life . And even though I had that moment on Saturday , that doesn't mean my life sucks and it's horrible . Do you know what I mean ?

I think it's important to honestly normalize the ups and downs that we have and that people don't have perfect lives and it's not meant to be perfect . We're meant to feel and express , and that's my intention is to become fully expressed .

I have held back in so many areas of my life , with relationships with partners , with relationships with my family , with my friends , with my employer , you know . Because what are people going to think ? Am I going to upset somebody ?

And you know what , if I can , when I learn to communicate and express in a safe way and ask for what I need , there's nothing wrong with that and that should be our normal to be able to truly be ourselves and have that be okay . I spent so many years in the people-pleasing stage of my life of not wanting to upset anybody .

And you know what , when we do that , we're not being who we are and we're putting on a show and then people don't even get the opportunity to really get to know the true us .

So the other thing that happened is , after I had that release which was amazing I got up the next day and I was on a really amazing phone call about some future things that are going on in my life and got some clarification on some things , which brought me some peace , which was really good .

And then I put on a playlist that a friend had made for me and I sat down at my computer and I worked on a project and I finished it and it's something that I had put off for a long time . It's something I've wanted to do and I'm really excited to share it , hopefully next week , and I finished it .

And so sometimes we need to let that out , let those feelings out , let those emotions out and not stay there . I didn't stay there , but I let it out . And so what are some ways that you can do that ? Some safe ways to express yourself Cry , cry , let it out . If you feel like you need to cry , just cry .

Water is a flow of energy when you let your feelings out and you just cry it . I usually feel really good after I do that . I mean , sometimes I cry happy tears , sometimes I cry sad tears , but sometimes you just need to cry . You can scream . You can go to a safe place and scream . You can scream into a pillow .

That's one way to get those feelings Like it was literally like this tight , constricted feeling . But when you scream , you're using your voice and you're expressing and getting that out of your body . Intentional breathing is another way that you can do that . You can do alternate nostril breathing .

You can just do square breathing , like breathe in , hold , exhale , breathe out . You know , and you can do that Writing . Writing is a great way to express , having conversations another good way . So , anyway , I just think it's important to like you're not alone . Do you know what I mean ? Like this is the shit .

This is the shit that we all go through , and when people pretend like they're not going through it , I don't honestly believe them anymore , because we all have thoughts , feelings and emotions , and when we hold them in , it's only hurting us .

So , hopefully , you will find a way to safely express your feelings and emotions and , if I can be of any help , I have free group monthly coaching mindset magic coming up on July 12th . The link to register for that is on my website , which is in the show description . There's also opportunities for energy healings .

I have done several of those as I was completing my second certification over the last couple of weeks , and they were incredible and we were moving energy through people's bodies with some incredible results . So you can book a energy healing session , or there's also life coaching opportunities available there too . So , however , I can help .

I would love to help you move through the shit . So I'm here for you and I'll be excited to share my big announcement of the project that I completed , and we'll talk about some naked yoga , because that's been an interesting experience I want to share about . So , anyway , I hope you have a beautiful , beautiful day and an incredible week . So much love .