Trauma isn’t always about what happened - sometimes it’s about what didn’t. Lisa already felt anxious and lonely navigating pregnancy, birth, and postpartum in a new country without the safety net of family or maternity care in her mother tongue. But this sense of isolation was only compounded by the absence of safety, connection, and support when Lisa’s newborn was rushed away to the special care nursery without explanation, leaving her alone for hours. With her concerns about her baby’s reflux...
Jun 01, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 46
When Amber-Lee found herself unexpectedly pregnant, she knew life was about to change - but nothing could have prepared her for the profound impact that a complicated pregnancy, birth, and postpartum period would have on her mental health. In this powerful episode, I’m joined by Amber-Lee from @thepowerofbirth and host of Can We Talk About This? who candidly shares her personal experience of perinatal mental ill health with unflinching honesty. From two unexpected pregnancies to the debilitating...
May 18, 2025•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 45
Just when she thought the debilitating anxiety of her pregnancy was behind her, Natalie found herself pushed to the brink by insomnia. What began as ten sleepless nights quickly unravelled into terrifying hallucinations and inescapable panic that she would never be able to sleep again. In this raw and deeply moving episode, we sit with Natalie for part two of her story as she reveals the emotional toll of sleep deprivation and divulges one of the most vulnerable moments of her life: the unexpect...
May 04, 2025•56 min•Ep. 44
Like so many of us with antenatal anxiety, Natalie downplayed her symptoms and clung to the belief that she would find relief from the all-consuming worry and insomnia when her baby was finally in her arms. But instead of finding relief after birth, Natalie’s symptoms only grew stronger. In this heartfelt episode, Natalie shares in excruciating detail the messiness of mental health during pregnancy and recounts how a flare of her pre-existing autoimmune disease and a ‘high-risk’ label only fuell...
Apr 20, 2025•57 min•Ep. 43
Whenever Kristy struggled with anxiety or depression in the past, she coped by keeping herself busy. Even when she endured years and years of IVF and ICSI, she coped by keeping herself busy. But when she experienced birth trauma and a sudden decline in her mental health during postpartum, none of her previous coping mechanisms could be relied on. Instead of throwing herself into exercising three times a day, working on weekends, starting projects, learning a new skill, doing puzzles, building Le...
Apr 06, 2025•1 hr 3 min•Ep. 42
It’s nearly impossible to think about Chloe’s story without thinking about all the places where she navigated the worst of her anxiety and melancholic depression: the hospital where she was left parenting in a traumatised body after a retained placenta; the inner-city Sydney suburb where, shockingly, she could not access any maternity support services; her in-law’s house on the other side of Sydney where she moved to create a village but could not sleep; and the local esplanade where she pushed ...
Mar 23, 2025•52 min•Ep. 41
Dayna’s story really gives meaning to the phrase one thing after another. When she birthed her son, there was no golden hour or newborn bubble, which is something she’s still grieving. Instead, there was an emergency c-section, a dystonic reaction, mistreatment from hospital staff, over 30 hours of separation from her baby, and a special care nursery admission, not to mention flashbacks, anxiety, panic attacks, rage, and hypervigilance. More curveballs only compounded this trauma in the form of ...
Mar 09, 2025•1 hr 21 min•Ep. 40
With a family history of postpartum depression, Chloe thought she knew what signs and symptoms to look out for when it came to perinatal mental illness. But, as she says, she didn’t know about the ‘opposite side’. Immediately after birth, Chloe couldn’t sleep, and within five days, she was experiencing a psychotic episode - or what she calls, ‘the crash’. Like clockwork, the same thing happened within five days of her second birth. In this episode, Tassie mum of two, Chloe, vividly recounts the ...
Feb 23, 2025•1 hr•Ep. 39
There are SO many parts of Sophie’s story that I want to emphasise. Like how depression made Sophie feel so numb that she didn’t know what to say when a nurse asked her if she loved her daughter. Or like how intrusive thoughts made her feel so scared that she didn’t want to go near her baby. Or like how the symptoms of psychosis made her feel so confused that her husband had to write her detailed instructions to be able to shower. Or like how she panicked, instead of celebrated, when her ‘involu...
Feb 09, 2025•1 hr 8 min•Ep. 38
Sarah put on a brave face for the first three months of Isla's life but behind closed doors, the all-consuming anxiety was only getting worse. It wasn't until her husband was home over Christmas that she could no longer hide the severity of the illness and she finally said 'I need serious help'. Many things stand out to me about Sarah's story: the pervasive anxiety that invaded her early postpartum experience; the insomnia and inability to switch off that added to her stress; the eventual depres...
Jan 26, 2025•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 37
For over a year, Ariane hid the true severity of her symptoms and tried so hard to portray a choreographed image of the good, responsive mother who kept it all together. Motherhood was the performance of her life… until it wasn't. The stage makeup and sparkles fell away when her symptoms escalated and she had to be admitted to a general psychiatric hospital. Ariane had to finally step out of the spotlight and allow her psychiatrist to take the lead, but this is when she was able to recover. In t...
Jun 02, 2024•53 min•Ep. 36
When Ariane became a mother, it wasn’t just the sudden onset of delusions, hallucinations, and severe depression that haunted her early days of parenting. From body image triggers, the pervasive grip of perfectionism, the reluctance to seek help, and the fear of her son being forcibly removed, it was also Ariane’s complex history as a ballet dancer, case worker and registered psychologist that cast a long, dark shadow over her mental health in pregnancy and postpartum. In this episode, I am join...
May 26, 2024•1 hr 5 min•Ep. 35
OCD had been part of Emma’s life for many years, although she just didn’t know it. Like for so many of us, her life-long OCD wasn’t picked up on until early motherhood, after two miscarriages and the birth of a premature baby during a pandemic lockdown. In Emma’s words, “it awoke the OCD beast.” This is one mother’s poignant story about the pain of loss, of experiencing depression and an OCD crisis in motherhood, the resulting shame and anger that came with the diagnosis, and the all-too-familia...
May 19, 2024•41 min•Ep. 34
After experiencing birth trauma and the isolation of becoming a first-time mother during the pandemic, Laura was both excited and determined that her next pregnancy, birth, and postpartum was going to be different. The experience with her daughter, Millie, was going to be her ‘redo’. Unfortunately for Laura, re-experiencing fetal growth restriction (IUGR) and a precipitous labour broke her. Flashbacks, insomnia, panic attacks, and depression immediately hijacked her second postpartum and left he...
May 13, 2024•54 min•Ep. 33
After a blissful experience with her first son, it never occurred to Jess that a subsequent pregnancy and postpartum could be any different - until she found out she was pregnant with twins. From real and perceived health complications, Jess’s mental health rapidly declined with every intrusive thought and compulsion that took over her life. The increased caretaking demands of parenting multiples and a toddler only compounded the feeling that she wasn’t enough for her children. Despite being car...
Apr 28, 2024•1 hr 8 min•Ep. 32
As a midwife with zero history of mental ill health, Caitlin didn’t expect to develop severe postpartum depression and anxiety at all, let alone after the birth of her second child. She certainly didn’t expect to be wheeled through the same hospital where she worked down to the psychiatric ward for an eight-week admission. And of course she never expected that electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) would be part of her story to treat her treatment-resistant depression. In this poignant episode, Caitlin...
Apr 14, 2024•46 min•Ep. 31
When Tessa was admitted to a mother-and-baby psychiatric unit during pregnancy, she made her unborn baby a promise that they’d never have to return. Unfortunately, the challenges of early postpartum and the pressures of perfection only compounded until she and her new born son were readmitted to her ‘little safe haven’ the MBU - not once, but twice. This is one mother’s captivating story about finally accepting the need for additional support in its many forms, about letting go of shame and guil...
Mar 31, 2024•57 min•Ep. 30
After her dream physiological labour and birth, Amelia’s world was turned upside by a sudden postpartum haemorrhage that whisked her away from her husband and daughter. From the moment she awoke from the surgery, Amelia was consumed by mania and insomnia. Over the next eight weeks, her postpartum psychosis escalated but Amelia was able to hide most of her delusions and hallucinations from her care providers. That is until finally she made the brave call to ask for help and present to her local h...
Mar 17, 2024•36 min•Ep. 29
This is a story that begins in November 2022 when I received a message from a new mum who wanted nothing more than to change the trajectory of her motherhood story. This is a story about a mum who’d just been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, who was experiencing vivid intrusive thoughts and panic attacks, and who couldn’t stop crying. This is a story about a mum who made the move back to rural NSW to be closer to her family for support, but who was now struggling to find the right professi...
Mar 03, 2024•52 min•Ep. 28
Birth trauma permeated much of Claire’s story and it impacted her mental and physical health in ways she could never have imagined. This was only exacerbated by the border closures and a tumultuous feeding journey. ‘Failure to thrive’ was a label that was applied to her son, but ultimately became a label she applied to herself. In this episode, Claire @mamahood.my.way talks about the anxiety and paralysis she felt when trying to conceive, a PTSD and Lupus diagnosis, a birth debrief with her hosp...
Feb 18, 2024•51 min•Ep. 27
I really didn't think I'd be back here behind the microphone telling my own story again. I didn't think I'd have anything to share because I had many hopes that things would be different this time. I hoped that I would be different this time. But here we are. For many reasons, for so many of us, pregnancy is not always the most joyful time of our lives. Logically, we know it's temporary, but that doesn't necessarily make it easier. And I know I'm not the only one to hold conflicting emotions abo...
Feb 04, 2024•39 min•Ep. 26
When Ashlee entered motherhood, she expected the transition to be easy from her many years of working with children. What she didn’t expect was the severe anxiety she experienced in her first pregnancy or the depression that overshadowed her postpartum. As a perinatal and infant mental health psychologist, she also didn’t expect to miss her own red flags. Sleep, feeding, and health complications with her daughter also diverted any attention away from Ashlee’s wellbeing, and left her blaming moth...
Dec 04, 2023•1 hr 11 min•Ep. 25
With a background in child development psychology and extensive experience working with thousands of babies, Siobhan was, what she thought, going to be off to a running start in motherhood. That was until she was confronted by a traumatic birth and intense sleep deprivation at the height of the pandemic lockdowns. Siobhan’s sense of self was challenged and her first postpartum experience was overshadowed by chronic anxiety and depression. With the development of hallucinations and suicidal ideat...
Nov 05, 2023•1 hr 3 min•Ep. 24
‘Are you feeding your baby?’ These are the words that confronted ICU nurse, Elyse, at a week postpartum when she was told her newborn son was starving, despite her strict three-hour feeding regime. In her words, a diagnosis of insufficient glandular tissue (IGT) or breast hyperplasia caused her world to fall apart. For weeks, Elyse tried everything to increase her supply but was instead left enviously watching the bond between Patrick and her husband develop while she was crying and pumping alon...
Oct 22, 2023•46 min•Ep. 23
In this episode, I’m joined by Gemma - a recovering perfectionist, accredited social worker, perinatal counsellor, podcast host of @postpartumlikeaboss , and mum-of-two. From the moment she fell pregnant, Gemma experienced an immediate sense of identity loss and anxiety that lasted until postpartum. While the anxiety and unknowns disappeared after birth, the relentlessness and challenges of early motherhood left Gemma at her lowest. Despite experiencing mental ill health in the past, Gemma found...
Oct 08, 2023•50 min•Ep. 22
When Sarah was discharged from the mother-and-baby psychiatric hospital, she felt both refreshed and proud. Her recovery from postpartum anxiety and OCD became a badge of honour. But that wasn’t the end of Sarah’s story with maternal mental ill health. Severe depression, a medication change, a presentation to the emergency department, and a second and third MBU admission filled pages of a book she thought she had already closed. Join me for part two of Sarah’s story as she is once again forced t...
Sep 24, 2023•1 hr 7 min•Ep. 21
We’re all familiar with the adage ‘healing isn’t linear’ but we don’t often talk about the way a non-linear recovery ambushes the way we see, and feel about, ourselves. This attack on her perceived sense of self is something Sarah was continuously forced to confront with every lapse that she encountered on her recovery from postpartum anxiety, OCD, and depression. Postpartum progressively broke down any deep-rooted misconceptions Sarah held about mental health and slowly challenged the unspoken ...
Sep 10, 2023•1 hr 13 min•Ep. 20
Monique’s birth may have been quick, but its complications and long-term impacts were anything but. From a 3rd degree tear, prolapse, severe postpartum haemorrhage, a full levator avulsion on the right and a partial levator avulsion on the left, a near death experience, and a stay in the ICU, she paints a picture of the pain from her birth trauma and postpartum PTSD as a ‘storm’ - one that she is still weathering. But thanks to talk therapy with her long-time psychologist, self-compassion, group...
Aug 20, 2023•59 min•Ep. 19
As a psychologist, Gen was familiar with psychiatric wards, but with no history of mental ill health or any risk factors she certainly never expected to be on the ‘other side’ - admitted as a patient to an acute ward shortly after the birth of her son, Arlo. Following a relatively smooth pregnancy and delivery, Gen’s early postpartum was fraught with mastitis and the eventual development of sepsis. However, the life-threatening infection was surpassed by the rapid decline in Gen’s mental health,...
Jul 30, 2023•55 min•Ep. 18
With a history of anxiety and depression, Jess and her care team went into pregnancy with a plan to protect her mental health during postpartum. Unfortunately, serious and sudden medical diagnoses for her son, Jasper, immediately after birth meant Jess’s mental health was neglected amongst relentless surgeries, a two-month NICU admission, and full-time caretaking for a sick baby. The NICU experience cast a long shadow over Jess’s motherhood journey, leaving behind a trail of self-blame, overwhel...
Jul 09, 2023•1 hr 2 min•Ep. 17
