The people who are close to you know , like the people who you trust , let them in on what's going on . This may be one or two people , right , you may not trust any and everybody with what you have going on . Personally , I get it .
I truly do , because you don't want to just put your business out there in the street , but you want to sit down with that person that you do trust , who you can confide in , and have the honest conversation with them . So how do you do that ? Because sometimes we struggle with the language , the words hey sis , hey bro , you got a minute .
Anytime , somebody pretty much says you got a minute . This is not your everyday conversation . All right , y'all . We are back for another episode of the peace and prosperity podcast , and today we're going to be talking about how to ask for help . So I don't know if you can see my shirt for those who are watching on .
Youtube says I am not okay , and that's such a powerful statement , because there are times , then , where we're not OK , but we definitely are showing up as if we are . How many times have you been to work ? Have you even been on vacation or been going through something and nobody knows ?
So , even at the times where you feel like or people expect you to be happy maybe you just got a raise , you could have even just had a great life changing event Like maybe you just got married , just had a baby , all these things but internally , emotionally , you are still feeling like I'm not good right now .
And before we get into how to ask , I want to talk about the reasons we don't . One is because of stigma . It we feel like we are just supposed to be OK because this great thing is happening for me . Ok , I just got married . That means that I should be having the best time of my life . There's so many people who want to be married .
I feel bad for saying that I'm not in a good place , even though I have a loving spouse , even though I just had a baby , and I know there's a couple out there who's struggling with having a child , or there's somebody who doesn't even have a partner to have a child with .
So then you feel very guilty , like hey , should I really be saying that I'm not good because I know somebody else has it worse than me ? Well , let's say this real talk . Somebody else will always have it worse than you , but that doesn't mean that you can't say I am not okay .
So when you think about realizing that you need the help , the first thing that you have to do is be okay , not comparing your situation to everybody else's situation . That's their situation and your situation is your situation .
So if you're not okay , I want you to accept it and not put more pressure on yourself to hide it , to minimize it , because all you're doing is prolonging getting the help and actually owning the issue . We had to say that first . So it's okay to realize that I'm not in a good place . Don't compare yourself to what other people have going on Now .
Why don't we act like asking for help ? Well , we just talked about we feel like we we should be good because we've had so many other positive things going on . Maybe our life looks good , we're in a good financial spot .
So because I'm in this good financial spot , should I really complain that I'm anxious about this next big assignment or this next big career move ? It's OK to say that , right , even though maybe finances are good , emotionally we're not in a good spot , and I think we're seeing this more especially with athletes coming out now .
Opening up about how they're managing their mental health is making it easier for us to say , hey , I don't got 10 million or 100 million or 100,000 , whatever . So I guess I can say I'm not good , because if they got all that and they're not good , I know I should be able to say I'm not OK , we got to be more vocal about that .
So once you do that and you put it out there , you're honest with yourself about it You're going to feel so much relief in just saying that , hey , I'm not good right now . So what do you do ? How do you ask for help ? How do you ask for help ? The first thing you have to do is want acknowledge that the help is needed .
The first thing you have to do is want acknowledge that the help is needed . Like you need the extra support . This means that what you're currently doing is not working .
All the self-help books , all the self-help podcasts , all the journaling , the exercising , whatever that you're doing on your own , it's not working and it's okay for you to say that , like you need some extra help . That's the first thing . Second thing that I want you to do is evaluate , like , how long has this been going on ? What's the severity ?
Because sometimes , when it comes to asking for help one day we're really motivated to get the help . The next day really motivated to get the help the next day , not so motivated . So Monday , hey , I need to talk to somebody . Tuesday , you know what I think , I just need a break . I needed a day off work .
Now , the reason why I want you to evaluate how long has this been going on , because that's going to give you some insight on is this a temporary problem or has this become a permanent problem . But I'm just now starting to look at it .
So if you've been feeling like this for months on end , or even weeks at a time , it's probably you're probably not going to be able to manage this one on your own . So we're looking at the severity and the duration , or the intensity , too , because I want to know like , how long have you been in this spot ?
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So , while wait , make mental health and wellness a priority in your workplace today and contact us so we can support you all . All right , let's get back to the episode . Next thing I want you to do is start letting the people who are close to you know , like the people who you trust , let them in on what's going on .
This may be one or two people right , you may not trust any and everybody with what you have going on . Personally , I get it . I truly do , because you don't want to just put your business out there in the street , but you want to sit down with that person that you do trust , who you can confide in , and have the honest conversation with them .
So how do you do that ? Because sometimes we struggle with the language . The words hey , sis . So how do you do that ? Because sometimes we struggle with the language . The words hey sis , hey bro , you got a minute . Anytime , somebody pretty much says you got a minute . This is not your everyday conversation . This is not the what's up , bro , this is okay .
This person needs to talk .
So right now they're already probably tuned in that you want to talk about something heavy and when you have this conversation , preferably , if you can , in person , but if not , some sort of visual mechanism , facetime , something like that right , I wouldn't definitely not over text and not over the phone if possible , because you want that person we talking about asking
for help . You want that person to be able to feel your energy and see your , the body language , the nonverbal cues and be able to pick up on that . There's a lot that we can hide behind the phone . There's a lot that we can hide when they can't see us . When we're silent , because we're crying , because we're confused , because we're overwhelmed with emotion .
They can't see that . Through text message they may sense it . They could think OK , I see the little thing moving the bubble , but I don't see the words . But I want you to be again , preferably face to face or , if you have to because of distance or different locations , do some type of virtual setup .
Next thing I want you to do is ask them for accountability . Once you put it out there that you need help , you're not telling that person to be your therapist . You're not telling that person to be your life coach . You're not telling that person to prescribe you medication , but accountability .
Hey , I'm in a dark place , but I know when I'm on my routine I'm better . When I'm walking every morning I'm better . Can I call you ? Like ? Is 8 o'clock too early , 7.30 too early , 7 o'clock , whatever ? Can I call you when I'm on my walk , or can you call me to see if I'm doing my walk ?
That's how you ask for accountability , because , well , you're doing two things You're asking for help and accountability at the same time . Most people they're going to say yes , because they probably want . They want to help you and maybe they need to do something too .
So , oh yeah , while you walk , I'll be meal prepping , or while you walk , I'll be folding my clothes . While you walk , I'll be meal prepping , or while you walk , I'll be folding my clothes . While you walk , I'll be prepping for my day . Whatever the case , like it can be something that could also help them .
The last thing that you have to do is have , when you're asking for help , especially when it's not , let's go professional . When it's professional help , I want you to be . Do your due diligence on getting the right support for you . So that means that if you call a therapist . The first person is not your person all the time .
It's okay to ask some questions how would you help somebody like me in this situation and there's a whole episode on science to look for in a therapist ? I'm not going to go super down that hole , but I want to say don't feel like , just because you need help , that you have to just take whoever , even if you feel like it's not a good fit .
This is still the time for you to advocate for yourself and do what feels right Y'all . It's okay to not be okay , but it's not OK to not do anything about it . Right , acknowledge that stuff ain't been right . I've not been in a good spot . Acknowledge that I do have one or two people who I can trust . I need to let them know .
And then , when you do look for help , don't just take what you can get . And then , when you do look for help , don't just take what you can get . Be selective about who is going to be helping you , like you owe that to yourself . Hey , listen , listen , listen .
I really want you to send this to somebody because you're not the only person who is struggling with asking for help , especially men , with asking for help , especially men Like I know , right now I'm working with more brothers than ever , but it's still a lot of the brothers are saying I'm coming in because my wife is saying I need to talk to somebody , or you
know , my confidence has been low for a minute , but I just thought I had to quote , unquote , man up . So we still need that encouragement , that accountability , and listen y'all , trust me , it's working .
So I appreciate you all spreading the knowledge because by you doing so , you're not only going to be helping yourself , but you're helping somebody else in the process . All right , be blessed Peace . Thank you all for listening to another episode of the Peace and Prosperity Podcast . You all for listening to another episode of the Peace and Prosperity Podcast .
Again , if you are feeling like , hey , I'm experiencing high functioning anxiety , don't beat yourself up about it . It is okay . We all experience anxiety from time to time and I gave you a couple of things that you can do on your own , but don't hesitate to reach out to a professional to better manage what you're going through .
Okay , and lastly , make sure , if you have not like , share , subscribe to the podcast and send this out to a friend . And if you want to hear a certain episodes or have certain conversations . Let me know . You can shoot me a DM or just leave a review and I will definitely follow up . All right , y'all be blessed , peace .