¶ Building Confidence to Leave a Relationship
All right , y'all , welcome back to another episode of the Peace and Prosperity Podcast .
I'm your host , Jason Phillips , licensed therapist , confidence expert , and today we're diving into the conversation around how do you build up the confidence to leave a relationship , and this is one that could be really , really tricky , particularly if you've been in this relationship for a while . This is your first love .
This is the person you thought was going to be the one , but now there's some indicators that are telling you he or she is not the one . But you don't know how to play it out .
You know this is not what you want for yourself , but then you keep telling yourself maybe they'll change , maybe things will get better in the future , maybe if I just do this or if I just say that , they'll start to show up differently . But then these maybes just keep becoming more maybes and more maybes and it never happens .
You never get any concrete change . So some of the signs that you need to leave is one if there's abuse so physical abuse , emotional abuse , verbal abuse you definitely want to get some help and get more counsel if you need to truly get out of this relationship and do it fast , because safety is always going to be first .
Another sign that you need to leave is if this person or if you're only staying in a relationship because you don't want to like break up a happy home or you don't want the perception that you failed in your marriage or you failed with this relationship with your partner .
You're staying in the relationship essentially out of pressure , whether it's external , internal , but you know it's not the relationship for you . So how do you do it ? You're like , okay , jason , you're telling me this is where I'm at , but how do I build up the confidence to leave ? First thing I want you to do is let go of the guilt .
See , leaving it takes you having to communicate with your partner , with your spouse , that the relationship is coming to an end , but there may be some internal guilt that you feel that's preventing you from having that conversation . You don't want the blowback , you don't want the perception that you failed , but I want you to let go of all of that guilt .
Now that takes work . So this may be talking to your therapist , writing in your journal , really getting into some , some , some healing , some spiritual healing that you have to do , but I want you to release the guilt that comes from leaving this relationship . That's the first and foremost hey Peace and Prosperity family .
I want to take a moment to talk about something vital for all organizations employee wellness . Here's what some of the past organizations have shared about their experiences .
So far , I've learned that my mental health has a huge impact as a leader on my team's health , but also to be looking out for signs that I've already been seeing and learning tips on how I can take those back to help myself as well as my team .
So I really appreciate Jason because he really put a lot of stuff in perspective for me . I don't get a lot of days off you know what I'm saying so when I do take one off , I feel really , really guilty .
It's like , oh my gosh , I got so much to do , but knowing that like , hey , it's okay , take a break , be yourself and then come back to this and you'll be better , it's just it's nice to keep hearing that , so that's good .
But it was good to reevaluate and see that you know everyone has burnout things like that and also just learning how to deal with it more effectively . Be yourself , love yourself , and other people are going to love you too . Like regardless . And workplace is not just workplace , this is family . He was a great speaker .
Yeah , probably one of the best ones that I've seen so far . If you're interested in investing in your team's mental health , visit jasonlphillipscom or visit the link below , and let's talk about creating a thriving work environment for your organization .
Now back to the episode .
The second thing I want you to do is you have to forgive yourself . See , a lot of times when we leave a relationship or when we know it's time to leave , we can see ourselves making the decision , but then we're like what ? But if I only , or if they only do this , or if they can change that , and then we start to feel bad and beat ourself up .
What did I do wrong ? How did I let this happen ? I don't want this to be me or my life . I don't want to quote unquote die alone . That does not have to be your future . But in order to execute and make this decision , I want you to forgive yourself for staying too long .
If you knew the relationship should have ended a while ago , but also take some of that pressure off that you caused this problem . Did you cause your partner to cheat ? Did you cause your partner to spend all the money ? Did you cause your partner to call you out your name ? Did you call your partner to neglect you ? Did you cause your partner to stop working ?
Did you cause your partner to not show up for you and respect the family and the values ? You didn't cause your partner to do any of these things . But what happens is we take more responsibility for someone else's action and think that it's all our fault . It's like it's all inclusive . All of this is something that I could have controlled . One .
You don't have that much control I wish you did , but you don't and forgive yourself for thinking that you did in the first place . The third thing I want you to do is truly lean in and ask yourself what do you want for you ? And this is where the clarity starts to come in . What is the relationship that I want ?
When I'm working with couples or individuals , I ask them to write down the trace that they want for their partner . So what happens when they when it is time , to date or when they are in a healthy space ? These are the people that they start to attract Somebody who's loving , who's caring , who loves God , who's health conscious .
But you have to be clear on that first , and let me throw in a bonus tip Let other people in . Don't isolate yourself and think that you're going to be able to work through this on your own . That's how you stay stuck in a relationship for so long in the first place . Be vulnerable , share your story , be authentic , take feedback .
Don't take it personally when they tell you hey sis , hey bro , she for the streets Like to hear that about someone that you love . Yes , it's going to be hurtful , but it's also going to be honest . Let these people in . So let's recap One if you're trying to get out of a relationship and you feel really stuck , you have to let go of the guilt .
Second thing , I want you to really , really truly do the work and forgive yourself . Lastly , identify who you want , what you want this person to look like , what the principles and the values you want them to embody . And that bonus let other people in .
Don't try to go through this all on your own , because if you do , you'll likely find yourself staying in the same unhealthy situation . All right , y'all , we had to have this conversation . I think sometimes we shy away from it , but know that you got this and be blessed Peace .
¶ Managing High Functioning Anxiety
Thank you all for listening to another episode of the Peace and Prosperity Podcast . Again , if you are feeling like , hey , I'm experiencing high functioning anxiety , don't beat yourself up about it . It is OK .
We all experience anxiety from time to time and I gave you a couple of things that you can do on your own , but don't hesitate to reach out to a professional to better manage what you're going through .
Ok , and lastly , make sure , if you have not like , share , subscribe to the podcast and send this out to a friend , and if you want to hear certain episodes or have certain conversations , let me know . You can shoot me a DM or just leave a review and I will definitely follow up . All right , y'all be blessed , peace .