What can we learn about the inner life from a 2005 epic film about the Crusades? Check out our discussion and find out! Rhys and Caleb delve deep into their loves of story, film, history, faith, and the journey towards inner peace to unpack the layers of meaning in this highly under-rated director's cut of a Ridley Scott film. The story is simple - follow the lowly blacksmith Balian as his long lost knight-of-a-father reclaims him and ushers him into the crusades. Travel to Jerusalem, supposedly...
Apr 10, 2025•1 hr 13 min•Season 3Ep. 73
Healing takes many forms, and many of those forms combine well to bring out their best parts! Elizabeth's healing journey has taken her through the 12 Steps, naturopathic healing, eastern medicine, and Christianity. Through her own journey of healing and learning to love herself, she has also learned much about healing others. In our conversation today, I add in my own experiences of Recovery, the 12 Steps, Orthodox Christianity, and we talk about the daily practices in all areas of our life tha...
Apr 07, 2025•1 hr 5 min•Season 3Ep. 76
Join us for our dive into Inside Out 2, Pixar’s latest exploration of emotions, identity, and mental health. In this discussion, we analyze the film’s portrayal of anxiety, self-concept, and emotional growth as Riley navigates the challenges of adolescence. With insights from professional counselors, we break down how the movie captures the complexity of the inner world, the transition from childhood to adolescence, and the role of emotions like anxiety, envy, and embarrassment. We’ll also touch...
Jan 25, 2025•44 min
In this special episode of Outer Circle Inner Stillness , we sit down with author and recovery advocate Patti Clark. Patti shares her deeply personal experiences, spanning decades, including relapses, reconnecting with herself, and building a fulfilling life in recovery. We delve into the challenges and nuances of recovery, particularly the unique experiences of women, and the creative tools and practices Patti has embraced along the way. From journaling to multi-addiction meetings, Patti offers...
Jan 08, 2025•1 hr
When we were small, we could go out to the swings or share toy cars, and we were friends. Later, we could sit together for hours—maybe talking, playing games, or simply enjoying each other’s company in silence. We weren’t afraid to be ourselves or to open up to others. Or maybe we were, and the problem only grew worse. Now, as adults, we find ourselves freakishly busy, terribly lonely, desperately wanting to see and be seen, to love and be loved... but how? Ahshuwah Hawthorne has spent his entir...
Nov 26, 2024•1 hr 2 min
In this heartfelt and humorous episode, Rhy’s sits down with his longtime friend Toni Hammer, to explore the unexpected intersection of trauma, humor, and mental health. Tony shares her journey of using humor as a coping mechanism for anxiety and depression, discussing the balance between self-deprecation and self-awareness. Together, they delve into the complexities of using humor in the healing process, the importance of connection, and finding hope amidst challenges. This episode offers a fre...
Nov 20, 2024•46 min
In this conversation, licensed therapist Darrin Ford shares his journey from skeptic to advocate of mindfulness practices in recovery. Drawing from 20 years of clinical experience and his own recovery journey, Ford explores how mindfulness can help break destructive patterns and foster authentic self-discovery. He discusses the science behind meditation's effectiveness, dispels common misconceptions, and offers practical insights for integrating mindfulness into daily life. Whether you're in rec...
Nov 19, 2024•49 min
In week four of the Object To Icon Book Study , Rhys explores how we move from objectification to authentic human connection. This episode tackles the challenging journey of removing our protective masks and creating spaces for genuine vulnerability. Rhys shares insights from both Orthodox Christian tradition and contemporary counseling approaches, offering practical wisdom on: Understanding our tendency to objectify others and ourselves The delicate balance between vulnerability and boundaries ...
Nov 15, 2024•42 min
Rhys Pasimio welcomes Conrad Lipic, a combat veteran and therapist based in Fairbanks, Alaska. Together they explore the complex challenges faced by military personnel transitioning to civilian life, discussing healthy masculinity, addiction recovery, and the journey toward emotional wholeness. Conrad shares valuable insights on helping veterans reconnect with themselves and society, offering a unique perspective that bridges military experience with therapeutic practice. The Outer Circle Inner ...
Nov 11, 2024•46 min
Rhys Pasimio sits down with Matt Rensi, a licensed clinical counselor and Marine Corps veteran, to explore the challenges faced by military personnel during their transition to civilian life. Matt shares his personal experiences of combat, the struggles of re-adjusting to a new reality, and the mental health challenges veterans often encounter. Together, they discuss the importance of structured support, community engagement, therapy, and the healing power of spirituality and a connection to God...
Nov 11, 2024•59 min
The opposite of objectification is curiosity. In this episode, I discuss how we can respond to pornography and the "pornified mind," in the context of relationships. In marriages, courtships, dating, friendships, and other encounters with people, we are susceptible to objectifying the other person, missing the Image of God, and deeply damaging ourselves and the other person. What should we do instead? My suggestion is that curiosity, the discipline of seeking to truly see and wonder about the ot...
Sep 18, 2024•21 min•Season 4Ep. 64
In this week's discussion we tackle two main topics. 1 - we cover chapters 7-9 which explore the softening of masks into veils. These chapters are about how to open up to others safely, and how to see others gently. As in most things, we should be wary of extremes, and seek to be gentle and mutual in our opening up to each other. Here we talk about some of the ways the sacrament of Confession is especially powerful. 2 - How to talk to our kids about sex! This is a topic I've been very excited to...
Sep 12, 2024•34 min•Season 4Ep. 63
Recently my community did a group study of the book From Object to Icon by Andrew Williams. In this study, we talked at length about iconography and veneration and how these phenomena should inform our relationships. We also talked about objectification and pornification as the inverse of the holy seeing-the-humanity-of-the-other. Recognizing that pornography, and a pornographic mindset, create myriad problems in the world, I created a parallel discussion about how to respond to pornography in p...
Sep 11, 2024•25 min•Season 4Ep. 62
First, apologies that there is no week 1. Recently I hosted a study of the book From Object to Icon , by Andrew Williams. Andrew Williams is an Orthodox Christian, and a graduate of Holy Cross Greek Orthodox School of Theology, and Oxford University, and the host of the podcast "Finding the Freedom to Live in the Image of God." Williams says, "The icon is central in our relationship with God; it is a source of healing and sanctification, and through it we can transcend the 'Things and facts of a...
Sep 06, 2024•32 min•Season 4Ep. 61
We started with the internet and a question about how to best prepare our kids to navigate the online world. Now, we talk about pornography. Central to all of our concerns about our kids is the very present reality that kids get hurt, exploited, disconnected, and overwhelmed by digital and online content every day. It's not just about pornography...but we recognize that porn and sexual content has a particular prominence amongst the dangers to our kids found on the internet. So then, we who are ...
Jul 08, 2024•46 min•Season 3Ep. 60
How will you talk to your kids about the internet and devices? What kind of parameters will you set and why? What do you see are the benefits and risks of giving developing humans access to the maelstrom that is the online world? In particular, how will you equip your kids in preparation for inevitable exposure to pornography? I asked these questions of a group of dads who are also counselors, most of whom also specialize in sex and porn addiction. And thus, this conversation was born! The Outer...
Jul 01, 2024•43 min•Season 3Ep. 59
All couples have problems, and sometimes they are problems the couple cannot solve on their own. How can a couple begin to thrive when they are feeling stagnant? How can a couple survive the very difficult times? How can a couple heal after lethal wounds such as infidelity and betrayal? Some couples go to counseling because they are doing well adn want to go from good to better. Others go to counseling because they need(and are able to use) some good tools. Then there are the couples who have de...
Jun 10, 2024•40 min•Season 3Ep. 58
Matt Droguett is a Life Consultant and Self-Sabotage expert who is passionate about encouraging men in living whole and healthy lives, and who firmly believes in the importance of doing his own inner work. Hailing from the Hawaiian islands, he brings his experience, expertise, and attention to men caught in patterns of sabotaging their marriage, particularly through use of pornography. His dream is to see emotionally healthy people go viral. As is our custom, we talk about recovery - Matt’s pass...
May 22, 2024•50 min•Season 3Ep. 58
Contains explicit content - language, brief descriptions of war Sobriety is challenging, even in the best of times for well-resourced civilians. Some folks struggle more, among them, our armed forces. Soldiers in all branches of the military face a kind of stress that can only truly be understood by another soldier. Returning veterans carry unique burdens that can seem frightening and mysterious to those observing. Imagine what they are like for the people carrying them! We can observe that addi...
Apr 17, 2024•58 min•Season 3Ep. 56
Christian Gonzalez and Rhys Pasimio bring together clinical expertise, a shared love of Internal Family Systems, and the traditions of the Orthodox Church into one conversation about how to cultivate a healthy inner life. Our center is on the person of Jesus Christ, but we talk about the difference between an intellectual understanding that may or may not make sense, and a tangible daily lived experience. Orthodoxy offers a “Beautiful healing way to live, versus just a right way of thinking. Whe...
Apr 08, 2024•59 min•Season 3Ep. 54
Kevin Roberts is a husband, father, business owner, and a sub-deacon in the Orthodox Church. In today’s conversation, Rhys and Kevin discuss the meaning of commitment in the spiritual life. We reflect on how a person is shaped by the commitments the make, the relationships they maintain, and the life-long vocations they undertake. We reflect on being drawn to monasticism, but learning to know the presence of God in the midst of hectic family life. We talk about how submitting to authority, and a...
Apr 01, 2024•1 hr 11 min•Season 3Ep. 54
If Bible College was the crucible, then monasticism is daily crucifixion…and we’re glad to be here. Sister Lisa’s journey has taken her from Protestant Bible College, to Roman Catholicism, to becoming a nun, to founding a new monastic order in the wilds of Arizona. Here, she and Rhys discuss the spiritual life, the sobriety life, and what we can learn from the monastic traditions. We explore how silence, the inner life, mindfulness, the nous, and daily entering a silent pause are all concepts th...
Mar 28, 2024•54 min•Season 3Ep. 53
How should “Creatures of the senses” manage their appetites? Here I talk with Abbot Tryphon about sobriety. We talk about the relationship between a person and their drug, the dangers of too much free time, the influence of our family systems upon us, and why running is good for sobriety. We talk about the importance of beginning the day focused on the faith, why men need bond with each other, hugging redwoods, and the time Abbot Tryphon was mistaken for John Lennon. So then, what can we learn a...
Mar 06, 2024•1 hr 2 min•Season 3Ep. 53
More monastic wisdom, more stories, more Abbot Tryphon! In the 2nd of 3 interviews, I continue asking Abbot Tryphon about the Orthodox faith, the inner life, and what people in recovery can learn from people in monasteries. We talk about continual learning and why we need mentors, sponsors, and spiritual fathers. We talk about why we need to read and permeate our lives in spiritual wisdom. We talk about icon, but also by “being pushy” is the worst thing we can do as Orthodox Christians. Above al...
Feb 28, 2024•1 hr 5 min•Season 3Ep. 51
What can we learn about the inner life from Orthodox Christian Monasticism? I wanted to find out, so one beautiful day in November, I made my way up to All Merciful Savior Monastery on Vashon Island, Washington, there to speak with Abbot Tryphon. From the Lutheran tradition, to secular universities, to the field of psychology, to chaplaincy, to Orthodox Christanity, and from Portland, Oregon to San Francisco to Southern Oregon to the Puget Sound, Abbot Tryphon has seen many things, learned many ...
Feb 21, 2024•59 min•Season 3Ep. 50
In recovery circles, we often hear that "Rigorous Honesty" is a good thing...but why is this? Orlando Rivera has been in recovery for more than 30 years, and active in the addictions counseling field, both counseling and teaching, since the early 90's. In today's conversation, he shares insights and wisdom about honest, self-awareness, vulnerability, and accountability. We talk about how overcoming denial to achieve self-knowledge is essential to being able to fully and authentically encounter a...
Jan 30, 2024•51 min•Season 3Ep. 49
What's a Firefighter Part? In the language of Internal Family Systems, Firefighters are one of the 3 major categories of "Parts" that typically exist in a human system. They are protectors that are reactive, defensive, volatile, big energy, and often the ones that get us into trouble. Typical firefighters include the parts that drink too much, smoke too much, act out sexually, over or under eat, numb out and dissociate, rage, lie, and even self-harm. Society's typical response to a Firefighter's...
Jan 01, 2024•1 hr 8 min•Season 3Ep. 48
In recovery circles, we often hear that "Rigorous Honesty" is a good thing...but why is this? Orlando Rivera has been in recovery for more than 30 years, and active in the addictions counseling field, both counseling and teaching, since the early 90's. In today's conversation, he shares insights and wisdom about honest, self-awareness, vulnerability, and accountability. We talk about how overcoming denial to achieve self-knowledge is essential to being able to fully and authentically encounter a...
Dec 27, 2023•51 min•Season 3Ep. 47
How is recovery like Barbecue Sauce, and what does this have to do with 9th century Church Fathers? And what’s the deal with the first 3-5 years of recovery anyway? In today’s episode, Rhys Pasimio and Shea Layton team up to interview CSAT counselor Dan Stephens, the founder of Restored Life Counseling, and developer of the long term Recovery Outcomes research project. A traditionally held understanding within addictions recovery work is that a good, solid, successful recovery process takes 3-5 ...
Dec 04, 2023•1 hr 10 min•Season 3Ep. 46
So you got clean and sober - great! …Now what? How does a person transition from the excitement and upheaval of early recovery into a more stable long-term recovery? What do you do in long term sobriety when the comfort of stability starts to feel like the tortures of boredom? How does a person find their most important values, and the community to support them? Stephen Grant is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, and a Relational Therapist, at Gracefall Counseling in Vancouver, Washington. He ...
Oct 10, 2023•43 min•Season 3Ep. 45
