Need some practical parenting strategies to help you manage hitting, backtalk and disobedience? Amy Williams has solutions. Amy is a school counselor who also helps overwhelmed and stuck parents. And let's be real: we all feel overwhelmed, stuck, and unsure at various points during our parenting journey. Giving ourselves grace is step one to moving forward, Amy says. Pause. Take some deep breaths. Step away from the situation, if you can. "If the tantrum is happening over there, but there are no...
Oct 28, 2021•58 min
Hunt, Gather, Parent, by Michaeleen Doucleff, shares ancient wisdom that's still relevant today: the key to raising healthy, happy, helpful humans is to engage them in work of the family and community. That's a truth we seem to have forgotten in our collective desire to optimize our kids. Our intentions are good, but our actions -- signing our kids up for multiple extracurricular activities; spending our weekends shuffling them around to tournaments and birthday parties -- may actually be harmin...
Oct 21, 2021•45 min
Teaching boys to drive can be exciting, scary. and intimidating. Boys are more likely than girls to speed, drink while driving, and take chances when they have passengers in the car. "I think he thought driving was going to be super intuitive," says Carole, mom of Lucas, a newly-licensed driver. "When we started, he was like, 'Whoa, this is not at all what I thought it was going to be!' It's not Forza." No matter how many hours your son has logged Forza and other popular driving video games, it'...
Oct 14, 2021•44 min
Let legendary parenting author Steve Biddulph teach you how to be a fully human parent. His book, Fully Human: A New Way of Using Your Mind, came out a few months ago and Janet talked to him about it then. Later this month, he's releasing a brand new online talk about being a fully human parent, so we're re-running Janet's conversation with Steve and encourage you all to check out his talk. We'll let Steve tell you about it: For months now I have been hard at work writing and filming a BRAND NEW...
Oct 07, 2021•51 min
Parenting boys thru divorce is...challenging. Hard. Not fun. And also, important and worthy of your best effort. Unfortunately, most people going through divorce are not exactly in peak condition. Divorce and separation is all kinds of stressful, and it's near-impossible to be your best self when so much of your time and energy is focused on survival and figuring out what the &#*(^ happened to your relationship. Start by dialing back some the guilt. Reports that divorce is uniformly terrible...
Sep 30, 2021•47 min
Is healthy sports parenting possible? At elite levels of competition? If you watched the 2020 summer Olympics (held summer 2021), you know that the stress & strain of elite competition was a big focus this year. Simone Biles had the “twisties.” Michael Phelps talked about his bouts with depression. A few months after the Olympics, Biles and other former Olympians testified (again) about the abuse they suffered at the hands of former team doctor Larry Nassar. We wondered, Is it possible for a...
Sep 23, 2021•32 min
Boy moms make the most effective boy advocates. That's a lesson Gemma Gaudette learned early on. Gaudette, the host of Idaho Matters on Boise State Public Radio and the mom of 2 sons, ages 13 and 9, didn’t really understand the challenges boys face in the world until she had sons. Now, she believes that moms of boys need to advocate on their behalf. "If we don't stand up for our boys, no one else will," Gaudette says. When her boys started elementary school, Gaudette realized that many adults mi...
Sep 16, 2021•38 min
Like it or not, your son will probably become sexually active at some point. Do you... a) buy him condoms? b) let his romantic interest stay over? c) say ABSOLUTELY NOT to sleep over requests? d) freak out? Or....???? Note: there are no "right" answers to these questions. Each family has their own values regarding sex, and each of our sons is a unique human being. -- which means that we each have to grapple with these questions. Today's guests are Dick and Dennie, a brother and sister who are ea...
Sep 09, 2021•46 min
Is your son musical? Yes, he is -- even if hates singing, doesn't play an instrument, and acts up in music class. Human beings are inherently musical creatures, according to Joan Koenig, author of The Musical Child: Using the Power of Music to Raise Children Who Are Happy, Healthy, and Whole. In her book, Joan says that music: Helps develop vital physical coordination Fine-tunes our speech & hearing Reinforces memory Builds a practice of creative things Creates pleasure & connection Unfo...
Sep 02, 2021•47 min
If you attended Seth Perler's TEFOS summit -- The Executive Function Online Summit -- and want more info, you're in the right place. (And if you missed the summit, no worries! You can still access recordings, and you'll get a lot from this podcast episode as well.) We first talked to Seth Perler about executive function in April 2021, and what he said was so foundational, so important for parents of boys with ADHD and other executive function challenges that we've decided to share it again. Some...
Aug 26, 2021•41 min
Amy Lang is our go-to sex ed expert. She's a mom of a son and she's not afraid to talk frankly about sex, pornography, relationships and consent. Our January 2021 conversation with Amy -- all about how keep boys safe online -- was so enlightening and informative that we've decided to run it again. Some gems: “All the research shows that parents are the most important influence when it comes to sexual decision-making. If we don’t get in the door early, our impact is less. It’s really important to...
Aug 19, 2021•42 min
Meghan Leahy is one of our favorite parenting experts. Her advice is grounded in experience (she's got 3 kids and is a parenting columnist for the Washington Post), understanding (again: she's got 3 kids!), and compassion (like the rest of us, she's exhausted and overwhelmed). She's honest, engaging and an absolute hoot. Her latest book, Parenting Outside the Lines: Forget the Rules, Tap Into Your Wisdom and Connect with Your Child, was published just over a year ago -- so we thought this would ...
Aug 12, 2021•43 min
Yes, you can thrive with chronic illness and special needs. In fact, you can create a Very Happy Story no matter what challenges you're dealing with on the home front. Liza Blas, a mom of two, created the Very Happy Stories podcast and blog after realizing that her overwhelm was overwhelming her family. She also realized that not talking about her family's challenges -- ADHD, depression, chronic illness, anxiety, suicidal ideation -- was not helpful. "As a mom, you have a tendency to put up a pr...
Aug 05, 2021•39 min
What do you with troubled boys? With boys who are failing school, sneaking off, and using substances? Boys who have resisted disciplinary efforts and redirection? That's the question at the heart of Kenneth R. Rosen's latest book, Troubled: The Failed Promise of America's Behavioral Treatment Programs. There are no easy answers to that question but Ken's book makes one thing abundantly clear: sending your son away to a camp or program for troubled children probably won't help. In fact, sending t...
Jul 29, 2021•44 min
When we become parents, someone really should hand us a book that details, exactly, how to NOT raise an a-hole. Karen Alpert (of the blog Baby Sideburns), a mom of two and author of Mamas, Don't Let Your Kids Grow Up to be A-Holes: Unfiltered Advice on How to Raise Awesome Kids, recognizes that parents are terrified of inadvertently raising assholes. "It is definitely one of my big fears," she says. "I don't want to raise a kid that's an a-hole. All the sexting and scary stuff and male chauvinis...
Jul 22, 2021•35 min
Dr. Michele Borba knows how to help boys thrive. She's a "boy mom" -- a mother of 3 grown sons, educational psychologist, and the author of Thrivers: The Surprising Reasons Why Some Kids Struggle and Others Shine. Many boys are stressed but don't tell their parents because "they don't want to hurt us," Dr. Borba says. They want and need coping skills, and aren't getting what they need from school social-emotional learning (SEL) programs. And they're really worried about "flunking life." It's tim...
Jul 15, 2021•47 min
Ever wished you had a guide to raising boys? A manual you can consult when your tween son confuses and frustrates you? Now, one exists -- and it's Jen's first book! The First-Time Mom's Guide to Raising Boys: A Practical Guide to Your Son's Formative Years, by Jennifer L.W. Fink, was released on July 6, 2021. It's a handbook that's intended to help moms navigating the tween years (approximately ages 8-12) for the very first time. Janet says Jen "interprets a complex subject in a way that's wise,...
Jul 08, 2021•41 min
Parenting a child with ADHD or neurodivergence can be challenging. Especially if you're also neurodivergent. "When my youngest son was about 3 weeks old, he started crying and it really never stopped," says Rachel Blatt, co-host of the podcast Constant Chaos. At first, they thought it was colic, but visits to multiple gastrointestinal specialists didn't help. When he wasn't yet talking (at all) at age 2, "a wonderful teacher" suggested having the child evaluated. The family schedule an appointme...
Jul 01, 2021•35 min
You may wonder, how do you raise a feminist son? Or you might be wondering, WHY would you raise a feminist son? What if we phrased it this way: How do you raise boys who respect and value all humans? "The word feminist, all over the world, has taken on so many definitions and meanings," says Sonora Jha, author of How to Raise a Feminist Son. "To me, the best definition is still Gloria Steinem's: Feminism is the radical idea that women are people too." It is the idea that all humans are worthy of...
Jun 24, 2021•46 min
Do you have a highly sensitive boy? Perhaps your son has been called "too sensitive” or “too emotional.” Maybe he is easily overwhelmed, especially when he's surrounded by a lot of sensory stimuli. Approximately 10% of all males are thought to be highly sensitive -- and often, others imply that they aren't "man enough." In a culture that's long valued stoicism in males, sensitivity is seen as a a liability. Except...emotional intelligence -- the ability to identify and process emotions -- is now...
Jun 17, 2021•39 min
Like us, Teacher Tom is concerned about how we raise our boys. "In our culture, we have a society where men are lonely, men have higher suicide rates and men are more prone to violence, and sexual abuse. And I don't think that's in the nature of men. I think it's somehow in the nature of how we're raising men," says Tom Hobson, aka "Teacher Tom," a preschool teacher at Woodland Park Cooperative Schools. "A big piece of it -- and huge piece of it -- is around emotions." The only negative emotion ...
Jun 10, 2021•51 min
Having sons forced Tosha Schore to reevaluate everything she knew about boys. Schore, the daughter of a single mom, grew up stepped in the women's movement. As a child, she attended marches and rallies for women's rights and, in college, she majored in Women's Studies. She was pregnant with her first child and sidelined with a bout of nausea when a startling thought popped into her head: What if I have a boy? The thought was "terrifying," Tosha said, noting that "it never even occurred" to her, ...
Jun 03, 2021•37 min
Steve Biddulph is a legendary parenting educator. He's the author of The Secrets of Happy Children, Raising Boys in the 21st Century: How to Help Our Boys Become Open-Hearted, Kind and Strong Men, and The New Manhood, among others. His latest book, Fully Human: A New Way of Using Your Mind, isn't about child-rearing, though. It's a simple, working manual for being human. "I wanted to write something that was a culmination of a lifetime of working with people," Steve says, noting that he also lea...
May 27, 2021•50 min
Is future-focused parenting the key to raising adults? Yes, says Deana Thayer and Kira Dorrian, parent coaches and co-hosts of the Raising Adults podcast. "It's not about raising boys; it's about raising men," Kira says. "Who are these men we want our boys to become? How do we want them to walk through the world, and what do we have to be doing right now to foster that?" Future-focused parenting, Deana says, helps parents "make the decision that's best, rather than the one that's easy." It's a t...
May 20, 2021•38 min
School + nature = forest schools Image: Laine Photos and Film "A forest school is holistic education outdoors in nature," says Nicki Farrell, co-founder of Wildings Forest School in Queensland, Australia. Learning doesn't typically follow set curriculum; rather, it's child-led. Education is individualized and play-based and includes plenty of movement. The kids who struggle the most in traditional schools -- wiggly, can't sit still, can't focus -- are often those who thrive in nature. "Children ...
May 13, 2021•32 min
Males represent 25-40% of individuals with eating disorders. That’s not something people tell us when our boys are babies, and it’s not something most pediatricians mention at well-child checks -- despite the fact that males are at a higher risk of dying from an eating disorder than females. "We have this notion that only a certain type of a person gets an eating disorder," says Oona Hanson, a parent coach and Family Mentor at Equip, an eating disorder program. But that's simply not true. People...
May 06, 2021•43 min
Can you prevent addiction? Or alcoholism? After all, no one dreams of taking their son to rehab. Or arguing with him, repeatedly, about his use of pot, alcohol or meth. When our babies are little, we tell ourselves that if we do everything right, our sons can avoid alcoholism and addiction. But that’s simply not true. 24% of 8th graders have had at least 1 drink by 8th grade. -- and about 50% of those drink heavily. Boys may be particularly at risk: according to the National Institute on Drug Ab...
Apr 29, 2021•41 min
Does your son have a problem with executive function? Let's put it another way.... Does he struggle with homework, procrastination, time management, or lack of motivation? Does he have ADHD? If so, he probably needs help developing his executive functioning. “If you want to help a kid who is struggling with homework, grades, procrastination, under acheivement, time management, and motivation, you have to understand ONE thing - and one thing only - and that’s EXECUTIVE FUNCTION," says Seth Perler...
Apr 22, 2021•41 min
How DO you homeschool boys? Trying to recreate school-at-home doesn’t work for most boys -- as so many families found out during the pandemic. And placing your life and career on hold while you educate your kids isn't exactly practical either. Linsey Knerl, a freelance writer and mother of six (including 5 boys!), says it's possible to homeschool boys without losing your mind or your career. "The secret is to not pretend that you aren't still doing life while you're homeschooling. Embrace the fa...
Apr 15, 2021•38 min
What would happen if we based our education for boys on their interests? The idea of crafting an education around a student's interests is a bit novel in today's world of standardized curriculum and tests. But the concept is sound. As parents (and educators) know, trying to force a child to learn something they don't find interesting or useful is an exercise in futility and frustration -- and trying to keep a child from doing something they're determined to do is equally frustrating. Some school...
Apr 08, 2021•44 min
