Episode 29 - When Life Just Sucks
Welcome to the Proverbs 910 Ministries Podcast, No Trash, Just Truth. We are your hosts and co-founders of Proverbs 910 Ministries, Rose Spiller and Chris Paxson.
We are continuing in our series, Real Truth about Real Stuff. In this episode, we are going to talk about when Life Just Sucks. We need to start with a disclaimer that in this episode we are specifically speaking to believers. We know there are a lot of unbelievers out there in pain, too, but the hope and encouragement offered in Scripture is exclusively for anyone who has made Jesus their Lord and Savior. For unbelievers, the most important thing they need is the Gospel message.
I’m glad you made that distinction, Chris. My guess is a lot of you listening can relate to times when life just sucks. Maybe you have lost a child or spouse, maybe you have been a victim of violence, maybe you’re lonely, or have an addiction or disorder they deal with on a daily basis, maybe you are constantly struggling financially, maybe your family is in shambles, or maybe you are suffering for another reason. The reality is that for some of us, getting out of bed every day is not something we look forward to because our lives are hard, and may even feel unbearable at times.
There are so many Christians hurting, and the garbage that is being pedaled, like “live your best life now,” or “God wants you to succeed in all things,” or “if you have enough faith, anything is possible,” only makes things worse. So it’s crucial we all understand one foundational truth – being a Christian does not guarantee that we will be immune from the types of issues you mentioned, Rose, or many other problems and trials you didn’t mention. This truth is repeated in several verses in the Bible, but Jesus puts it simply and bluntly in John 16:33, where He says,“In this world you will have tribulation.” Or “trouble” as some versions say.
That’s an important place to start, Chris. Sometimes expectation makes all the difference. If we believe liars and con artists like Joel Olsteen or Joseph Prince, our expectations are that God wants everything to always be fabulous in the earthly lives of His people. The problem is that if you believe this, then when things aren’t fabulous, you’ll be left feeling either God is mad at you, you don’t have enough faith, or that you’ve done something wrong. Friends, if I could smack these guys, and so many others like them, upside the head, I would! They have done extensive damage to so many people.
I’m right there with you. 1Peter 4:12 says, “Dear friends, do not be surprised at the fiery ordeal that has come on you to test you, as though something strange were happening to you”. In both this verse and the John 16:33 verse, Scripture makes it pretty clear that Christian can expect trials and suffering on earth. And if anyone is telling you any different, they are a liar and a heretic. And we should say that there are certainly times when our own sin brings about some of the trouble in our lives, and we are going to talk about that, but as the verses in John and 1 Peter, and others show, Christians can expect to have troubles, trials, tragedies, disasters, even death come into our lives. And its not because God is mad at us; its not because we don’t have enough faith; and it may come even if we have done everything right!
So we’ve established that we will all face some kind of trial or suffering in our life; but that doesn’t mean they are distributed equally to everyone. There is no doubt that some Christians have a lot more difficulties and pain heaped on them than others. And, honestly, we can’t answer as to why of that. But we can give you answers to other questions.
We can. We will answer the most common questions asked about pain and suffering like how can a loving God do this to me? Why has God allowed so much pain in my life? In the World? And Where is God when I’m hurting?
And please know that at no time are we making light of anything you may be going through. Yes, the Bible says Christians can expect to suffer. But nowhere does Jesus or any Biblical writer say that those troubles or tribulations will be easy, nor do they say that they won’t be painful, devastating, or maybe even deadly.
Chris, I think before we answer the questions you posed, we need to address something you alluded to earlier, and that is when we are the cause of our circumstances.
I think that is a good place to start, because if we are the cause, then it means, that we may actually be able to do something to help our circumstances! When we find ourselves in a bad place, or if our life is a train wreck, or we are really unhappy, we need to first look at if anything we have done is the cause of it. We need to examine if we have sinned in the situation or are living in a sinful state.
Examples of this might be your life or family being a torn apart by an addiction you have or because of an affair you had; or maybe things are a mess because you are being negligent or abusive to your family. Maybe you are struggling financially, but when you really look at it, its because you are living above your means.
When you first go to an AA meeting, they encourage you to stand up and admit that you are an alcoholic. This is because when you admit out loud that you have a problem, it enables you to then deal with it. We can’t change something unless we recognize its existence. Our sin works in the same way. Once we acknowledge our sin and responsibility for our situation, we can ask God for forgiveness and ask the Holy Spirit to help us repent of it.
It may be hard to admit you are steeped in sin, but if you are, God already knows it – and probably many people around you do, too! By denying it, you aren’t fooling anyone, but yourself. Once you admit to God your responsibility in your situation, truly ask forgiveness, and sincerely repent, with the help of the Holy Spirit, you will feel empowered to better overcome that sin.
We see a great Biblical example of this in the life of King David. The narrative is found in 2 Samuel, chapter 11. David basically rapes a woman names Bathsheba, and she becomes pregnant. He tries to pawn the baby off as her husband, but when that plan fails, he arranges it so her husband is killed in battle. He then marries the woman.
David does repent of his sin. There are still consequences that are paid – like the baby dying, but once David repents, asks God for forgiveness, and accepts the consequences of his actions, he is able to move on with his life and achieve the great things God planned for him.
And we aren’t saying acknowledging your sin, turning away from it, and dealing with the consequences of it will be easy, or that you won’t backslide, but taking responsibility for your sin is definitely the first step in fixing your situation. Proverbs 28:13 says “Whoever conceals their sins does not prosper,
but the one who confesses and renounces them finds mercy.” And Acts 3:19 says, “Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord.” Our prayer for anyone that is listening who is feeling convicted by the Holy Spirit that something they may be doing themselves is causing the pain in their lives, that you would go before God, confess your sin, and ask Him to help you turn away from it.
And if you aren’t completely sure what you are doing wrong, but know you are doing something, ask God to show you what your sin is. You have nothing to fear. Psalm 103:8 – 13 says, “The Lord is merciful and gracious,slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not deal with us according to our sins,
nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us. As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear him.”
Love that! Okay, let’s move onto to when our pain and circumstances aren’t our fault. Like when we lose a loved one, or if we are lonely, or have been the victim of someone else’s sin, or so many other reasons!
Chris, we’ve already said that Christians can expect to suffer, but let’s answer the question why? Why does a loving God allow His people to suffer?
This is a question that has perplexed people since Jesus’ time. And it began with Jesus’ Apostles. Just about every one of them was beaten, tortured, imprisoned, and killed all for proclaiming Jesus as Lord. How’s that for life sucking?! And throughout history, there have been millions of Christians who have faced the same treatment for the same proclamation. One thing we know for sure is that God is sovereign over everything! He is, and has been, in control of the entire universe, and everyone in it since the creation of the world.
Colossians 1:16 - 17 confirms this, “For by him all things were created, in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or dominions or rulers or authorities—all things were created through him and for him. And he is before all things, and in him all things hold together.” If knowing that God is in complete sovereign control of every single thing in your life makes you more upset because you have been getting by telling yourself that its Satan who is causing the problems, or bad things “just happen” and it has nothing to do with God, I want you to consider this. As a believer, you should know that God is completely good and completely loving. Would you rather your circumstances, no matter how bad they may be, be in God’s Hands, or in the hands of chance, or worse yet, in the hands of Satan!?
So knowing God is in completely control, and that He is good and loving, let’s answer why He lets bad things happen to those He loves. And we can begin to answer this question, by starting with this truth - the ultimate purpose of the entire universe, and everything in it is to display the greatness of the glory of God. And at no time does God’s glory shine more brightly and more beautifully than through His grace. So the ultimate aim of everything – even suffering – is to display the glory of God and His grace.
I’m sure a lot of you are wondering how does your suffering glorify God and show His grace. John Piper puts is perfectly, “the death of Christ in supreme suffering is the highest, clearest, surest display of the glory of the grace of God. Because this is true, a stunning truth is revealed, namely, suffering is an essential part of the created universe in which the greatness of the glory of the grace of God can be most fully revealed. Suffering is an essential part of the tapestry of the universe so that the weaving of grace can be seen for what it really is.Or to put it most simply and starkly: the ultimate reason that suffering exists in the universe is so that Christ might display the greatness of the glory of the grace of God by suffering in himself to overcome our suffering.
So what did Jesus accomplish through His own suffering at His crucifixion and resurrection:
1. He absorbed the wrath of God that we deserved – Romans 5:9 says, “Since, therefore, we have now been justified by his blood, much more shall we be saved by him from the wrath of God.
2. He Purchased forgiveness of our sins – 1 John 4:10 says, “In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins.
3. He Imputed His Righteousness to us - 2 Cor 5:21, "For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God"
4. He Defeated Death – 1 Cor. 15:57 says, “He gives us victory over sin and death through our Lord Jesus Christ.
5. He Secured Satan’s Defeat and Destruction – After the fall, God told Satan in Gen. 3:16, “He (Jesus) will crush your head, and you will bruise His heel.
6. He obtained final healing and an eventual end to all suffering for His people – Rev. 21:4 shows us this, “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away
7. He assured that we will spend eternity with God in Heaven – John 14:3 says, “And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.
So, we can all agree that Jesus suffered, and that suffering was so that the grace of the glory of God could be shown to the world, and be of invaluable benefit for those Jesus died for. But how is the glory of God shown through our suffering? Well:
1. Nothing deepens our relationship with God and our faith more than suffering
2 Cor. 1: 8-9 says, “For we do not want you to be ignorant, brothers, of the affliction we experienced in Asia. For we were so utterly burdened beyond our strength that we despaired of life itself. Indeed, we felt that we had received the sentence of death. But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.
2. Nothing gives us a greater eternal reward than suffering – Romans 8:17 says, “and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him so that we may also be glorified with Him.
3. Nothing emboldens others to step up more than suffering – Paul says in Phil. 1:14, “Most of the brothers, having become confident in the Lord by my imprisonment, are much more bold to speak the word without fear”
4. Nothing draws us to Christ more than suffering
Again, Paul speaks on this in 2 Cor. 1:5 -6, “As we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation”
5. Nothing displays God’s strength in our weakness more than in our suffering – In 2 Cor. 12, When God refused to remove Paul’s “thorn in the flesh,” he said to Paul, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Paul responded, “I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong”
Rose, we’ve given sound Biblical reasons why Jesus suffered and why God allows His people to suffer. But let’s now talk about the reality when we are in the midst of that suffering.
Chris, Richard Wurmbrand was a Pastor in Romania after WWII and was imprisoned for 14 years by Russia for proclaiming Jesus. He was regularly tortured and starved. He recalls times the bottom of his feet were beaten so badly, his skin came off like ribbons. As another method of torture, they put Pastor Wurmbrand in solitary confinement. For 2 years, he was kept in a completely dark 5 x 5 cell that was completely silent. Even the guards wore foam on their shoes to keep it silent.
In his book, God’s underground, here’s what he had to say about all he endured. “The prison years did not seem too long for me, for I discovered, alone in my cell, that beyond belief and love there is a delight in God: a deep and extraordinary ecstasy of happiness that is like nothing in this world. And when I came out of prison I was like someone who comes down from a mountaintop where he has seen for miles around the peace and beauty of the countryside, and now returns to the plains.”
In the two years that Pastor Wurmbrand was kept in solitary confinement, he composed 1,000 sermons in his head that he recited out loud. When he was finally releases from prison, he remembered almost all of them and gave them at his church. From what we read that he himself said about his suffering, I can imagine that his sermons would have been quite different had he never suffered.
So what got Pastor Wurmbrand through his suffering and what will get us through ours? Hope. The world defines hope as wishful thinking that something will happen. The Bible defines hope as the confident expectation of what God will do for His people because of what Christ has already secured for them. Psalm 30:5 says, “Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning” and 2 Cor 4:17 says, “For this light momentary affliction” is preparing for us an eternal “weight of glory beyond all comparison” Like we said, we are in no way making light of what you may have suffered, or are still suffering, but if you are in Christ, you can rest in the peace that your suffering is only temporary.
Good Friday is coming up. Never was a day filled with so much suffering, nor was there ever a day that seemed so hopeless. Jesus suffered horrifically, but He wasn’t the only one who suffered. The Apostles suffered as they watched their Lord arrested, tortured, and killed. Even though Jesus had told them what was to come (as He tells us we will suffer), when they were in the midst of it, they had no way of fully comprehending what He meant.
But them something miraculous happened! Sunday came! And with it, Jesus’ resurrection and restored hope to His followers. Rose, let’s finish up with a post we did on our Proverbs page several months ago.
Good idea!
On June 18, 1815, the 68,000-man British army, commanded by Arthur Wellesley, Duke of Wellington went up against Napoleon Bonaparte, self-proclaimed emperor of France and his army 72,000 troops near the village of Waterloo. The Brits had everything on the line in this battle. If they defeated Napoleon, it would be an end to his reign of terror; but if they lost, Great Britain would become yet one more European country taken over by Napoleon. Knowing the entire country was anxiously waiting, the army devised a system to communicate the results of the battle as quickly as possible.
A man was situated in a boat off of the shore of Waterloo. When he saw the results of the battle, he was to signal a man in a church tower who would signal someone else, who would signal someone else, and on and on until the results reached the people of Great Britain. When the battle was over, the man in the boat was able to signal 2 words before a heavy fog rolled in, “Wellington Defeated.” This message was passed on down the line until it reached the people of Great Britain. The Brits were devastated. They had put all of their hope in the Duke of Wellington, and he was defeated. What hope was there for them now?!
Three hours later, though, the fog cleared and the man in the boat was able to get the rest of his message through, “Wellington Defeated the Enemy.” As the completed message was passed on, you can imagine the joy and elation the people of Great Britain felt! History says Napoleon rode away from the battle crying.
When Jesus died on the cross on Good Friday, it was like Waterloo for His followers. They had put all of their hope in Jesus, and now the message they received was “Jesus Defeated.” I can’t imagine the devastation and hopeless they felt that Friday and Saturday. But on the third day, the fog rolled out and they were able to get the complete message – “Jesus Defeated the Enemy!” Perhaps you are in the Good Friday of your life. The message you are hearing in your head is I’m defeated.
But don’t let the message stay there. Let the beautiful promises of Scripture clear the fog and give you a new message that God who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of God’s glory displayed in the face of Christ.
And we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed.
Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal
That is a beautiful promise from 2 Cor. 4. And I want to end with another one from Romans 8, “If God is for us, who can be against us? . . . Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? As it is written, ‘For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.’ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us”
We pray that if you are in the midst of suffering, that you have found some encouragement today.
And if you aren’t, we pray you will store some of the verses we shared up for when the trials do come.
Thanks for tuning in today. If you have any comments or questions, or you would like us to pray for you, please message us through our Website, proverbs910ministries.com, or through twitter, facebook, or Instagram.
May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, the Father, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. Have a blessed day, everyone!