This week we watch Ryan Reynolds fight CGI nonsense! Which of course is different from the fact that his suite here is CGI o r X-Men Origins Wolverine where he becomes CGI nonsense. We watched Green Lantern: In Brightest Day and Darkest Night, yada yada yada, I HAVE THE POWER!!!!! Or something like that.... We wanted to visit the DC Cinematic Universe in time for Black Adam! So we turn to Goldeneye, Mask of Zorro and Casino Royale's own Martin Campbell. How will Green Lantern hold up? Host: Nic ...
Oct 20, 2022•1 hr 12 min•Season 9Ep. 378
This week we watch some damn incredible Rick Baker effects. We watched An American Werewolf in London, who doesn't love a horror comedy that is actually funny? How does An American Werewolf in London hold up? Host: Nic Co-Host: Nur, Matthew and Daniel Written and Directed by John Landis Starring: David Naughton, Jenny Agutter, Joe Belcher, Griffin Dunne, David Schofield, Frank Oz
Oct 13, 2022•1 hr 21 min•Season 9Ep. 377
In an effort to fully break the mind of my co-host Daniel, we tackled the second Twilight Saga Movie: New Moon, the moon is for werewolf! In fact, I haven't listened to his edit yet, it may just be 90 minutes of screaming and sobbing, like a creepypasta or post hot wings night bathroom review. This week we learn that Edward is a liar: "This is the last time you'll ever see me. I won't come back, and you can go on with your life without any interference from me. It'll be like I never existed, I p...
Oct 06, 2022•1 hr 13 min•Season 9Ep. 376
This week we visit Stephen King with Silver Bullet. This movie has it all, one of the Coreys, Gary Busey, and a werewolf. Enjoy! How will Silver Bullet hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Matthew, Daniel Directed by Daniel Attias Starring: Gary Busey, Everett McGill, Corey Haim, Megan Follows, Robin Groves, Leon Russom, Terry O'Quinn, Bill Smitrovich
Sep 29, 2022•48 min•Season 9Ep. 375
This week we have the power! We watched The Masters of the Universe, The universe is power - pure, unstoppable power! And I am that force, I am that power! KNEEL BEFORE YOUR MASTER! Will Masters of the Universe hold up? Host: Nic Co-host: Daniel Guests: Candace and Charlie Directed by Gary Goddard Actors: Dolph Lundgren, Frank Langella, Meg Foster, Billy Barty, Courteney Cox, Robert Duncan McNeill, Jon Cypher, James Tolkan
Sep 22, 2022•58 min•Season 9Ep. 374
In honor of the fact that it is taking place now, we watched 1973's Soylent Green! It's podcast, SOYLENT GREEN IS A PODCAST! How will Soylent Green hold up? Host: Nic Hoffmann Co-host: Daniel, Matt Guest: Charlie Directed by Richard Fleischer Starring: Charlton Heston, Edward G. Robinson, Leigh Taylor-Young, Chuck Connors, Joseph Cotten, Brock Peters, Paula Kelly, Stephen Young, Lincoln Kilpatrick
Sep 15, 2022•1 hr 5 min•Season 9Ep. 373
This week on Myopia Movies, the Lorax gets his revenge! We finish our M. Night Shyamalan Month with the Mark Wahlberg vehicle, The Happening! All I want to know is if hot dog guy makes it! How will the Happening hold up? Host: Nic Co-hosts: Matthew and Daniel Written, Directed, and Produced by M. Night Shyamalan. Starring Mark Wahlberg, Zooey Deschanel, John Leguizamo, Spencer Breslin, Alan Ruck, and M. Night Shyamalan.
Sep 08, 2022•1 hr•Season 9Ep. 372
This week we tackle the movie that made me stop watching M. Night Shyamalan The Village! Enjoy monsters! Blindness! And whatever developmental issue that Adrian Brody is supposed to have! How will the Village hold up? Host: Nic Co-host: Matthew Written, Produced, and Directed by M. Night Shyamalan Starring Sigourney Weaver, William Hurt, Joaquin Phoenix, Bryce Dallas Howard, Adrien Brody, Brendan Gleeson, Cherry Jones, Judy Greer, Michael Pitt, Jesse Eisenberg and M. Night Shyamalan...
Sep 01, 2022•1 hr•Season 9Ep. 371
Note: There are audio issues with this file. I have cleaned them up some, but, there is still some artifacting. Sorry about that. Nic This week we continue the M. Night-a-thon with the first M. Night movie to lose money, Lady in the Water! This movie has it all! A mostly naked Bryce Dallas Howard (who is mostly mute), a starring role for M. Night, and Paul Giamatti with a stutter because his family was slaughtered...look out for a scrunt! How will Lady in the Water hold up? Host: Nic Co-Hosts: M...
Aug 26, 2022•54 min•Season 9Ep. 370
This week on Myopia Movies, we start our M. Night Shyamamonth! The twist is that it will start halfway through the month and end halfway through the next! In honor of the 20th Anniversary, we are going to talk Signs, the reason I haven't gone to a birthday party in South America. As we have been doing, we will announce in advance the next film! In fact, in honor of the theme month, we will tell you the whole line up of this Shyamalan-ebration! Signs 18-Aug Lady in the Water 25-Aug The Village 1-...
Aug 18, 2022•1 hr 14 min•Season 9Ep. 369
This month we continue the celebration of the return to new episodes and talk the first Vin Diesel starring vehicle, XXX! We live for this shit! Well, maybe not this movie in particular.... How does XXX (not pornography) hold up? Host: Nic Starring: Daniel Guest Star: Charlie Rose Directed by Rob Cohen Starring: Vin Diesel, Asia Argento, Marton Csokas, Samuel L. Jackson, Michael Roof, Richy Müller
Aug 11, 2022•1 hr 4 min•Season 9Ep. 368
This week on Myopia Movies we watch the first time Disney tried to do Star Wars, we watched Black Hole! Coming out 20 years after it look like it should have! How will Black Hole hold up? Host: Nic Hoffmann Starring: Daniel Suddes Guest: Charlie Rose Directed by Gary Nelson Starring: Maximilian Schell, Anthony Perkins, Robert Forster, Joseph Bottoms, Yvette Mimieux, Ernest Borgnine
Aug 04, 2022•1 hr 2 min•Season 9Ep. 367
This week, in honor of the twentieth anniversary of the final Austin Powers movie Goldmember , (despite reports for 15 years saying another is coming soon), we are watching Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery. Yea baby! How will Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery hold up? Host: Jon Panel: Nic, Daniel
Jul 28, 2022•1 hr 26 min•Season 9Ep. 366
Since we are covering Austin Powers later this week, we figured we should release a silly Bond Movie as well. Enjoy this coverage on Never Say Never Again , a remake of Bond's most boring movie Thunderball. Sean Connery returns as Bond to spite the Broccoli's in what was supposed to create a new Bond Spin-off to challenge the Timothy Dalton movies. Oof. How can the director of Empire Strikes Back make a movie this boring! How will Never Say Never Again hold up? Host: Nic Directed by Irvin Kershn...
Jul 25, 2022•1 hr 18 min•Season 9Ep. 365
This week, we head to the beach for two films from the back catalog and former patreon to celebrate the beach. We watched the most recent role in black face to get nominated for an academy award and the last time Tom Cruise got to act nutty. We watched Tropic Thunder. I don't drop character 'till I done the DVD commentary. How will Tropic Thunder hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Fitzy, Nic, Charlie Directed by Ben Stiller Starring: Ben Stiller, Jack Black, Robert Downey Jr., Jay Baruchel, Brandon T. Ja...
Jul 21, 2022•1 hr 2 min•Season 9Ep. 364
This week, we head to the beach for two films from the back catalog and former patreon to celebrate the beach. This episode we go to a movie that learned all the wrong lessons from its predecessor. After the success of previous episode A Muppet Christmas Carol they thought they could do another classic. The novel Treasure Island is a layup, right? Well, replace Michael Caine with Tim Curry and we are off to the races. Also, have it led by a child in his first role and you are in trouble already....
Jul 18, 2022•54 min•Season 9Ep. 363
This week, we have done it. As I said Monday, we worship the beautiful specimen that is Pierce Brosnan. From the heights of James Bond, to the depths of The Lawnmower Man, we focus on everyone's favorite Irish Bond. This time we review the Stephen King adaptation SO bad, he sued to remove his name, twice. How will The Lawnmower Man hold up? Host: Jon Panel: Nic and Daniel Directed by Brett Leonard Starring: Jeff Fahey, Pierce Brosnan, Jenny Wright, Mark Bringelson, Geoffrey Lewis, Jeremy Slate, ...
Jul 14, 2022•55 min•Season 9Ep. 362
This week on Myopia Movies, we worship the beautiful specimen that is Pierce Brosnan. From the heights of James Bond, to the depths of The Lawnmower Man, we focus on everyone's favorite Irish Bond. This week we watch Goldeneye and learn who is Invincible! How will Goldeneye hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Matt, Thomas, Daniel Directed by Martin Campbell Starring: Pierce Brosnan, Sean Bean, Izabella Scorupco, Famke Janssen, Joe Don Baker, Judi Dench, Robbie Coltrane, Tchéky Karyo, Gottfried John, Alan ...
Jul 11, 2022•1 hr 17 min•Season 9Ep. 361
Today, as a father, we learn that babies are pretty much indestructible. We watched John Hughes' Baby's Day Out, is this the worst mafia on film? How will Baby's Day Out hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Matt, Daniel Directed by Patrick Read Johnson Written by John Hughes Starring: Lara Flynn Boyle, Joe Mantegna, Joe Pantoliano, Brian Haley, Cynthia Nixon, Fred Thompson
Jul 07, 2022•52 min•Season 9Ep. 360
This week we visit the city of Chicago and visit a jazz club while running from the mop. We saw Adventures in Babysitting. How does Adventures in Babysitting hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Daniel, Matt Directed by Chris Columbus Starring: Elisabeth Shue, Maia Brewton, Keith Coogan, Anthony Rapp, Vincent D'Onofrio, Penelope Ann Miller, George Newbern, Bradley Whitford
Jul 04, 2022•1 hr 9 min•Season 9Ep. 359
This week we wrap up season 8 with Dexter's Lab: Ego Trip , a made for TV masterpiece by Genndy Tartakovsky, as we learn that Eddie Deezen is annoying throughout all time. Also, as an update, our Patreon is officially ending and we would like to thank all those who supported us during CoVid. In the meantime, we will be taking July off for vacation. Which for you means, you will receive two episodes a week all month long! Some from the Patreon and some from the old archive! Enjoy! How does Dexter...
Jun 30, 2022•50 min•Season 8Ep. 358
This week on Myopia we learn the true evil of owls. In honor of the release of Elvis, we watched the Glen Campbell/Don Bluth movie, Rock-A-Doodle. Nothing like a kid's movie about the forced sexual pressure put on actresses. Also, don't make the kid with the adorable speech impediment try to say "Chanticleer" 1000 times. How will Rock-A-Doodle hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Matthew and Daniel Directed by: Don Bluth, Gary Goldman, Dan Kuenster Starring: Glen Campbell, Christopher Plummer, Phil Harris,...
Jun 24, 2022•55 min•Season 8Ep. 357
In honor of the mediocre end to the Jurassic World Trilogy, we return to the 2015 movie that sucked the charisma out of Chris Pratt, Jurassic World; a movie I have now seen easily two dozen times due to my daughter's love of dinosaurs and a vast Mattel marketing line. Join us for a second season episode where we are young sounding and still optimistic for the hopes of Universal Dino movies, we ignore running in heels, and are generally high on a fun movie experience. Enjoy Hosted by Nic Directed...
Jun 20, 2022•1 hr 9 min•Season 8Ep. 356
This week on Myopia Movies, the take down Optimus Prime. We saw Transformers: The Movie (1986), cameos in disguise. Transformers: The Movie (1986) is Directed by Nelson Shin Starring: Orson Welles, Robert Stack, Leonard Nimoy, Norman Alden, Eric Idle, Scatman Crothers. Music Includes Weird Al Yankovic for some reason. Host: Nic Panel: Daniel and Matthew
Jun 16, 2022•58 min•Season 8Ep. 355
This week, we visit the hallowed halls of ACME Looniversity just in time for it to be closed for the summer, we watched Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Summer Vacation! Yet another movie directly poking Happy World Land, I mean Disney. Nothing like reminiscing to summer couch days and watching Tiny Toons. Starring: Charlie Adler, Tress MacNeille, Jonathan Winters, Don Messick, Edie McClurg, Maurice LaMarche, Joe Alaskey How will Tiny Toon Adventures: How I Spent My Summer Vacation hold up? ...
Jun 09, 2022•52 min•Season 8Ep. 354
This week, we bring down Disney just a little bit. We watched Shrek, Jeffrey Kateznberg's revenge on Michael Eisner. We fill in a major animated gap in our knowledge by watching this Dreamworks classic (?) and the first animated best picture winner. Starring: Mike Meyers, Cameron Diaz, Eddie Murphy, and John Lithgow. How will Shrek hold up? Panel: Nic, Matt, Daniel
Jun 02, 2022•1 hr 5 min•Season 8Ep. 353
This week, we cover the impressive, the rare, the Bruce Willis Musical! In honor of the great Bruce Willis' retirement, we are covering a rare foray away from the tough guy with the quips to the raw talent of a song and dance man! We watched Hudson Hawk, just let the man have his latte! How will Hudson Hawk hold up? Panel: Nic, Matt, Daniel
May 26, 2022•1 hr 5 min•Season 8Ep. 352
This week Disney teaches us that stealing from the mafia works out for the best, which may describe Michael Eisner's tenure. We watched Blank Check, the first and possibly only movie ever to be made with Sharper Image money. How will Blank Check stand when we put it on trial? Panel: Nic and Daniel
May 19, 2022•1 hr 1 min•Season 8Ep. 351
This week in honor of the Marvel return to the Multiverse, we visit the only multiverse movie about 2001 to not try stopping 9/11. Before you watch Dr. Strange, we saw The One. Have you joined the Patreon? Why not? At the lowest levels, you get access to the back catalogue! Mission Briefing adds an extra Bond related or spy movie every other month! At the Official tier, you get an additional extra episode a month! At the Riffing tier you get a movie riff Quarterly! At the top tier you pick a mov...
May 12, 2022•1 hr 1 min•Season 8Ep. 350
This week on we learn to just stick to the classics, otherwise you may waste $140 million. We watched a giggling fart cloud, I mean Treasure Planet. Sure, it's garbage, but it is beautiful garbage. Have you joined the Patreon? Why not? At the lowest levels, you get access to the back catalogue! Mission Briefing adds an extra Bond related or spy movie every other month! At the Official tier, you get an additional extra episode a month! At the Riffing tier you get a movie riff Quarterly! At the to...
May 05, 2022•1 hr 2 min•Season 8Ep. 349
