Episode #180 - How road rash = midlife magic

Welcome to the Mastering Midlife podcast where we talk about all the crazy fun things that happen when you are a midlife mama. I'm your host, Heather London.

hola guapas okay if you have been a longtime listener you know how much I love tennis and of course yesterday I was playing tennis And I play for my local city in a fun club, but I also play in a ladies league. and it's a little bit more serious but I try to always have fun because after all literally it's just tennis at the end of the day and it's a day league and so most of the women actually are retired, but we get some young ones in there like myself.

here and there actually it's funny because when we go to we go across the lower mainline and and when we go to the really hoity-toity clubs like the ones that are 150k a year for membership the people get younger and younger. So those people are like, because it's a day, the daily.

usually people are retired because most people are working during the day except when we get to like the really rich clubs because they don't have to work those people they don't have to work so anyway for the most part i'm a little bit well maybe i'm maybe i'm a little bit on the younger side but not much but there's some uh women there that are like 75 damn I want to be like that when I'm 75 I want to be out here playing in the league and all that but

Nonetheless, the funny thing is just because it's a league and you get points for wins and there's a standing, people just get more nervous when it comes to this. And so I try to not let that affect me because literally it's just a game. And if I win or lose, who? But when I lose, I really care. And I don't want to care because I used to be super competitive. And now it's hard to be competitive when you get older and you just play more casual sports.

I still do get competitive when it is, but I try to have fun. Because at the end of the day I think, oh my gosh, nobody will even know and it's not for anything. But I don't know why I'm telling you all of that. I'm just, oh, you know why? Because I'm setting the scene. Here's how this went down. So I usually play, they try to get us to play with the same partner because, you know, you get better when you play with the same partner.

and I just said I'll play with anybody I don't care because I just love to play and so tomorrow I'll be playing with a new partner. We've never played in a game together. And so she said, hey, let's practice before. So I'm like, okay. And so yesterday we had a practice.

so there was two other girls that also played together from the team that came out so we could practice against each other and you know see how we did and who should play what side and have some strategy and all that kind of stuff and It was like two hours of tennis. And the reason I'm telling you this story is because something crazy happened for me. And it might not be crazy for you, but for me, it was crazy. I actually totally bailed. I wiped out. I totally fell while playing tennis.

And the reason this is a story for me, the reason I think that this is worthy of a podcast is because It was... Hard. The ground was hard. Yes, you can see. Hold on. See that guy there? Yeah, if you're watching on YouTube, you can see my thing, and I got another thing on my thumb, but... have now have skin in the game so basically I was running for a ball and I was lining it up on my backhand and I do a two-handed backhand and it's my one of my favorite shots because I really like Hit it hard.

And as I dropped my shoulder and took a step, I felt like my shoe kind of stick on the ground like I didn't lift my foot high enough and I was like oh damn and then I lost my balance and then you know how it's in slow motion and you're falling and you're trying to

catch yourself before you fall but you're in that forward motion and you're so far forward that you can't pull yourself out of it you know like when you're running down a hill and you're like i'm gonna face plant and so that's what happened and then i tried to kind of like land as gracefully as possible so that it didn't, I don't know, break anything. And it was like, Damn, flat out. And of course my teammates came over and they're like, are you okay? Oh my gosh, are you okay?

And it sounds worse than it is because your racket hits the ground. As soon as your racket hits the ground, everybody looks because they're like, that's a racket hitting the ground. Somebody must have fallen.

the girls came over to see if i was okay and i was like yeah i'm okay and on my leg it's just like like it's just one big red spot now but when i hit it was from it was from the like halfway up my leg all the way up where the skin was like you can see that it was gonna be like a road rash right you know you know what I'm and when I looked at the ground there was just like my skin you could see the skin mark on the ground like damn that's a lot of skin that's gonna hurt in the shower later and

So first of all, I have skin in the game now, but it was the like, yeah, it hurts because of course you're hitting cement, but the whole, the main thing about it was that. It was like, okay, am I injured? Well, you know, you can feel the burn of the skin and my wrist is sore and all that. But I wasn't like...

Physically I could got up and kept playing but it was more like why is this such a horrible thing and it was more the ego like like i was my pride was hurt because i feel like I always would. look at myself and want to be a strong person strong and agile like my whole life I've never like that's how I always categorize my body and I know when I'm at my best when I'm strong so always strong and agile

And so for me to fall was just like, it was embarrassing based on how I think about myself and my brain. And now the wonderful thing about the ladies is they're like you know, checking on me, are you okay? And then one lady, one of the girls says, oh yeah I know I did that just the other day and she showed me her her scaps like that for some reason made me feel better and it was just a couple weeks ago like maybe two or three weeks ago where I was practicing outside again with the league team.

And. a girl fell and it was like oh like we're all like are you okay are you okay and she's like yeah she's a tough tough girl and um i see now like

what was going on for her in that moment was it was more like a pride thing or more embarrassment that you actually fell. You know how when people are choking like people usually die in the bathroom because they're choking and they get embarrassed and they go to the bathroom so that they're not in front of people people can't see them and then they die in the bathroom because nobody can save them there that's what this felt like it felt like just like

embarrassment like, ah, I gotta stay on my A-game, I have to be nimble, I have to be agile, and me sprawling on the ground was not agile. So I think it was mostly. like my thoughts about me that made it so bad. Because, of course, it's really not a bad thing at all, right? Like all the, you know, like the raspberries and that aside

I was thinking, why is this such a bad thing? Why does this really bother me so much? And it's based on my perception of myself, really. And when I went home and told my son... like you wouldn't believe what happened to tennis today and I was telling him the whole experience and how I was feeling and that I was maybe embarrassed and that's why it was like you know such a bad thing that happened and he gave me a new perspective which was really really cool which was no

falling is like isn't a bad thing falling is for the people who like are giving it their all who like show up and leave everything on the court, literally your skin on the court, but you really like are going for it and giving everything you've got. And I'm like, damn, you're right.

It wasn't the case in this situation because it was literally like my foot, my shoe dragged on the court, but that's how i think when i play i'm like i could get every ball i'm gonna get that ball and the girl that fell a couple weeks ago was like that too like no matter where you hit it she'll get it because she just is like never giving up and that's why she fell and I'm like oh that's such a great shift in perspective about the whole thing because then

it takes away that embarrassment like I don't feel embarrassed about it I feel more like it's a badge of honor or like yeah because I always give a thousand percent and it got me thinking about how life is like that in general and how I never really have

colored in the lines or followed the rules or Stayed inside the box. That's just not who I am when you do those kinds of things you're gonna fall down like when you take the road less travel or when you go down a path that doesn't even exist you're creating a path you're gonna fall down and It's not a bad thing because you're doing something that nobody's ever done before or that you've never done before.

And so it's a sign that you are living life to the fullest and you're putting yourself out there. And that's how I've always lived my life. I've always. Known that like I'm a multi passionate entrepreneur. I'm always going to be doing lots of things I have a thousand ideas and I love to explore new things and I love to help people and so how can I best put all of these things together?

And when I'm always creating something new that's never been done before by me, It's gonna be hard and you're gonna fall and you're gonna fail. So if you look at just all the failures, you'd think, oh, that's bad. I keep failing. But if you look at the context of why you're failing, and to me, the only way you fail is if you actually give up.

I like to fail forward so if I do something and it doesn't work then I have all of this knowledge about why it didn't work or what I could do next time or how I could tweak it just a little bit or a different idea around that. That's what keeps me going to creating something that didn't exist before just out of my imagination and I hold that space for myself

So that when I fall, I'm like, no problem. This is progress. This is how I get to where I'm going. And it's never about the end destination. It's always about the adventure or the path that you take. to get there. We always think like an entrepreneur path is you start here and then you go up, up, up, up, up. But it's not. It's like up and down and sideways and spin around. And that's why we choose it. People who have a brain like me choose this because it is that.

path because it is that experience and that I've lived my whole life like this and if I didn't live my life like this, I would feel tortured like I wasn't living because this is just how I'm created. I have big ideas and I go chase after them no matter what. And I also... Create. created that for my kids encourage my kids to do that like anything is possible all this shit is just made up you can do be create whatever you want and go for it

And when they were living at home when they were little, I'm like, this is the best time to come up with the craziest ideas and business ideas and adventure and just try it because you have nothing to lose. You have the safest net you've ever had. like you'll always have a roof and food and all that so create these big ideas and go just go running off the cliff and jump and then your parachute will appear because

If you don't, you're just going to totally rot. We call it rotting when we're not in our creativity and living life. and so we don't want to be rotting away we want to make the most of this life and I've created that for my kids and then I also create that for my clients as well because most people are stuck because they're like They know that there's more, but society, societal constructs, our education system, just all of these things would

push you in a different way and dictate that, hey, you should not do those things that you don't know how to do or that nobody's ever done because that's just not normal. And that's where I would be like, oh, tell me more. Like, now you have my curiosity peaked. What if? How could that be possible? And I'm telling you, so most people come to see me for like when they get into midlife.

weight loss and health that's the biggest thing but I feel like the even bigger part of it that they're not aware of and that tributes to your health and your weight is not living your true authentic life like feeling lit up like a star in the sky or a shooting star every single day because you're following your dreams or something is just calling to you and you're doing it.

I get these ideas that are just, totally out there and I'm like I don't know how I'm gonna do that but I do know that I'm gonna do it And most people will stop because they don't know how. As soon as we don't know how, we're like, i don't know how so how could i make this possible and then we just go back to our small lives that are actually created by our family, our parents, our grandparents, like just following the lineage along and not questioning anything, right?

Like if our mom taught us how to cook something, we never question it. That's just how we do it. I don't know, my mom showed me how to wash the dishes. Here, this is how I wash the dishes. And for me, I'd say to my kids, here's how I do this, but you could do it 10 different ways if you want. This is how I do it. But you could create your own way if you want. Because there's so many possibilities out there.

And I want all the midlife. And the reason midlife is just such a powerful time is because you have now completed the hours, the main... commitment of your kids 24 7 and when they become their own people we let them go and that's when we focus on ourselves and that's why this is the best time to do this and not Not even be like, where was I? But what?

What do I want to create now? If anything was possible, because it is. I say this all the time because I believe it with all of my heart. If anything was possible for you, because it is. If you could create anything for yourself because you can. If you could become anybody that you desire because you're already that person. It's already in you.

If you can think it in your brain, that means, if it's in your awareness, that means that it's possible for you. That's what that means. And so anytime you see somebody and be like, oh, I'd like to do that. And if you think that you can, then you should go for it. And setting yourself free like this, being a curious person full of possibility.

is the best way to live your life. I'm telling you, I have been living my best life this past little while and I just intend to keep it going and make it even better. And these things were never on my radar, but as I go and I have these ideas, and I believe in myself, and I support myself, and I get curious about how I can make this possible, and if I don't know the how,

I ask myself what's the next little step and I just take these little steps and then the road appears as long as I keep going and maybe I'm thinking I'm gonna go down this straight road but it's like oh I gotta go over here for a little bit and then over there for a little bit and that's okay.

Because you don't hit a spot in life where you go, okay, I've done it all. I know it all. I've seen it all. I've bought it all. I've experienced it all. That just doesn't happen. We're always a growing, creative, evolutionary. version of our energetic self because we're not Because we're an energetic being, and energy never dies, it just transforms. We're always transforming. And when we're done with this lifetime, there's a whole bunch of other lifetimes that we get to live.

But the heart of who we are, our soul, is energy. And no matter where we're going or what we're doing or what life we're on or what level we're at of enlightenment, We're always that energy. And that's the cool part. That's what this is all about. And if you could just let go of all that you thought it was. And then this might seem really crazy, but I want you to like look towards nature for your cues of what's possible. When I look at nature, like I'm so obsessed with flowers and plants because

They're just so amazing. And all they need are the basics. And if they have just the perfect basics, they just do their own thing like they just naturally flourish and flower and grow and then they have a cycle right this they go with the seasons why do they go with the seasons because the seasons are also nature Everything is nature. And so the best way that we can be the most delicious version of ourselves is to

Really listen to the natural cues of our body, of our thoughts, of our heart. What is our heart telling us? Follow these. really, they seem like whispers of something that we should be following, but that is nature. That's our intuition. That's what we know. Even when people are looking to heal their bodies, we always look to nature to solve this problem because

Our body is designed to heal itself. The only reason it doesn't is because it's out of homeostasis. Too much of something toxicity or not enough of something deficient. and nature is like that when i look at these plants i'm like it is crazy amazing that this can actually exist in nature the colors the patterns that just blows my mind and the reason like at first I'm like why am I so obsessed with this but I've come to know and learn and love is that because that is a reflection of

me or you or who we are as a human being. And that's possible for us too. The plant or the flower doesn't think about growing. It doesn't think about how it's going to flower. It just does. Because it just does what it does naturally. It just is. That's the thing. It just is. So if you could just allow yourself to be exactly who you are, exactly how you are, and love that version of you.

then you too will bloom into this amazing, gorgeous flower that you never even thought was possible. And you'll be like, Wow! I couldn't even have created this in my brain. This is so amazing. Now remember, it all comes down to allowing and just being. That's all it is. Follow the cues, follow the intuition, the whispers, the knowings, because that is where The magic happens. That is where you find out who you truly are and why you're truly here.

what really really lights you up and midlife is the time to do it so let's go if you need help with this let me know because I'm going back to my one-on-one client So if you want to book a one-on-one call with me, let me know. message heather at hotmail.com and let me allow me to show you what's possible for you the way I've done it for myself or I'm doing it for myself because

Sometimes all we need is a different brain to see it. So if I've created something for myself, I can't see the way out of it because it's this brain that created it. So this brain can't come up with the answer.

but if you have this brain over here that's me this brain over here and i'm looking at your brain i'm like i could see it from a different perspective and i can see oh look this is why you've gotten these results and here's how we change it so it's so powerful to have a different brain solve the problem that you're struggling with and get yourself unstuck.

But that is how I went from having some skin in the game like an epic fall. to being inspired to the possibilities. And even though I think I'm living my best life or a really amazing life, when stuff like this happens, I'm like, oh my gosh, there's even more. This is just the start and it gets even better. Thank you for listening. Always, always, always love yourself first, especially when you fall down. And have an amazing day.