Welcome to Manifest the Big Stuff. Today we're going to cover one of the most mythologized topics in the entire canon of manifesting: your feelings. We're going to set the record straight about feelings.
We're going to talk about what feelings are and what their actual purpose is. And then I'm going to help you put this all into action by sharing some real life examples of how to use your feelings to help you manifest parts of your material reality differently.
And you won't want to miss it when I share one very specific example of how to use your feelings to manifest yourself differently. I'm Greg Kuhn, your host and the author of the life-changing “Why Quantum Physicists” book series.
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Thank you for joining me today. Let's get started.
As an intentional manifestor of your material reality, you've been taught to use feelings to do things that they're incapable of. Let's correct that today. Let's set the record straight about feelings.
First, I'd like to explain to you what feelings are and what their purpose is. And then I'm going to go into some examples of how to use your feelings to manifest parts of your material reality differently, more closely aligned with how you truly desire.
Feelings are nothing more than evidence. I call them empirical data because they are telling you how capable or incapable your current beliefs are of manifesting the material reality you truly desire.
Feelings are the same exact thing as the digital readout on a thermometer that's been under your tongue. Now, you've been taught that feelings manifest your reality. But feelings do not manifest your reality. They are not the sources of what you manifest. They are strictly clues that emanate from what you manifest.
Clues that tell you how you might want or sometimes need to manifest your reality differently. We're going to focus today on bad feelings. Bad feelings have a bad reputation.
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They've been cast as an intentional manifestor's boogeyman. You've been taught to avoid or even erase bad feelings out of worry that they will manifest your painful and unwanted material reality.
But bad feelings do not manifest your reality. Bad feelings feel bad, and that's bad enough. But put this to rest. You do not need to manufacture better feelings by using traditional positive affirmations or positive thinking during painful experiences of material reality.
There are no incorrect feelings that you need to change, nor are there correct feelings that you need to start having. While some feelings are always going to be preferred, the only feelings you ever need to feel are the ones you're actually having.
You've undoubtedly heard that it's a good idea to feel the feelings you want to have. To feel the feelings that the thing you desire to manifest will give you, because doing that will help you manifest that thing you desire. And that's simply not true.
The truth is, if you don't feel the feelings that you actually have, you will usually continue to manifest the reality that's eliciting them. Feel your actual feelings so you can process them and then learn from them.
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Who cares whether or not anyone else would feel the way that you do? All that matters is that you feel the way that you do. And because you feel this way, you need the sharp, unambiguous evidence provided to you by how you actually feel.
Evidence that you can use to revise your hypotheses for how to best manifest the material reality you truly desire. And manufactured feelings from traditional positive affirmations will not give you sharp, unambiguous evidence because those feelings aren't how you actually feel.
Only your actual feelings can help you revise your hypothesis for how to best manifest important parts of your material reality differently. Don't change your feelings to manifest a more pleasing version of reality.
Manifest a more pleasing version of reality and that will change your feelings.
As you can, you will want to manifest your reality outside of yourself differently. And, to change how you're interacting with this unpleasant version of your reality, you will want to manifest a different version of yourself. And your bad feelings will provide you with powerful evidence for how to best do that.
Of course, there are a wide array of bad and painful feelings and we could pick any of them to focus on during this episode. I'm going to focus on anger. But if anger is not an issue for you, you may want to substitute any other painful feeling in its place.
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I've manifested many versions of material reality that have made me angry. And when you're angry or feeling any other bad feeling, you're not making it up. You get angry about things that make you angry.
You don't get angry unless the situation warrants it. Warranted or not, however, anger, like other painful emotions, can make your life much more difficult, and do the same for those around you.
Even when anger is a problem for you, the source of your anger is what you need to manifest differently. I highlight this because to manifest the source of your anger differently, you're first going to need to feel your anger.
Feeling your anger is not going to make it more real than it already is. It will not bring your anger to life, and in fact, until you feel it, it will only grow more real and more alive.
And you definitely don't need to worry about manifesting worse versions of your material reality by feeling your anger. In fact, the parts of your reality making you angry will only grow in that power until you feel your anger.
Anger is simply powerful information. It provides you with great evidence for how you can or should manifest the source of your anger differently.
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And you can't uncover that evidence without first feeling it. Sometimes, you will discover that you can safely manifest a different version of something outside yourself that's making you angry.
Here are some examples of using anger as evidence to manifest a different version of something outside yourself in your material reality. Each one of these examples uses my technique called “Find Your Coach”. Example one, you're a salesperson and you keep getting rejected, you keep getting told no, and this makes you angry. Can you manifest getting told no differently? Is it possible to do that?
Feeling your feelings of anger reveals that what's scaring you is failure, and you're very concerned that not selling will get you fired. That's understandable. You share your circumstances and your desires for a different reality with your coach. And your coach shares with you an old salesperson's adage: that it takes tennos to get to one yes.
Now, you can actually manifest a no differently. As a necessary step to get to your next yes. And that better version of your reality combined with your best efforts, changes your reality as you keep knocking on doors.
In our second example, you're leading a team in the workplace, and one of your most valuable team members rips into you about your leadership and the direction of the team.
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This makes you angry. Can you actually manifest getting criticized by your most valued team member differently? Is that possible?
Feeling your feelings of anger reveals that what's scaring you is the prospect of losing this very valuable team member. And it's very concerning to you how losing this valued member might impact your team's ability to get the job done.
That's understandable. You share those circumstances and your desired outcomes with your coach. And your coach shares some important wisdom with you. They tell you that when someone complains to you, you're still part of the solution.
Now, you can manifest those complaints as affirmations to lead and provide solutions. And that better version of your material reality, in addition to giving your best efforts to resolve the issues, changes your reality as your leadership moves forward.
In each of those examples, your anger was understandable. You weren't having the wrong feeling about things. Your anger left a breadcrumb trail for you to follow to find that great evidence, evidence that allowed you to manifest the outside source of your anger differently.
Here's an example of how I used evidence from bad feelings to manifest a different version of myself. Years ago, on vacation, my wife told me that sometimes my sons are hesitant to share things with me because they're afraid I'll get angry.
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No way, I said. I only get angry when there's something to get angry about. And my sons know that. So I asked her, the next time I do what you're talking about, I want you to tell me when it happens, because quite honestly, I didn't believe her.
The very next day, one of my sons didn't give me all the information I had asked for when I asked for it. And that lack of information forced some slight changes to our plans for the afternoon. And I got angry about it. I got angry with him. That night, my wife said, “Hey, Greg, remember when you asked me to tell you, well, you did it today.”
And for the first time, I saw my anger so clearly. I could see that I did get angry, and I got angry for a real reason. But I could also see anger wasn't necessary, and mostly it was not helpful in any way.
The evidence from my anger was clear and unambiguous. I didn't need to manifest the things making me angry differently, but I definitely needed to manifest myself differently. Not because my anger was never warranted, but because it was a go-to.
I used the clear, unambiguous evidence provided to me by my anger to form a new hypothesis to stay mindful and aware, and listen internally for my anger. And then, when I noticed an anger response, even when it's warranted, because in the moment, anger was always warranted for me, I decided to keep my mouth shut.
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And later, use a technique I call, “Satisfy Your Inner Critic” by asking myself, what is it about me that I'm afraid this situation might mean is true? And why is this making me angry?
I started testing this hypothesis, keeping my mouth shut and asking myself those questions. I kept my answers private, and what I often learned was that I was getting angry when I didn't feel in control of situations. And, when I worried that I wasn't good enough, and perhaps not being good enough was getting exposed.
Here's what my hypothesis has grown into today. My relationships with people and places, things and ideas are influenced by an almost endless array of factors: frequency, level of investment, expectations, history, power-dynamics, intent, and culture to name a few.
I understand today the subtle signs of anger, like sarcasm, changing the subject, joking too much, and arguing. In each experience when I'm angry, annoyed, defensive, I ask myself, what does this tell me about me? What does this mean about me?
I don't ask those questions because I shouldn't feel angry. I ask those questions because I do. Almost always. I find that no matter how justified my anger is, it is not necessary and almost never helpful.
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Doing this helps me manifest myself much differently and thus changes my material reality greatly. Do I go back to my family and say, I'm very sorry for getting mad all those times? Or maybe more accurately, I'm sorry I was an asshole so often.
You know what my son told me, the son I got angry at that day on vacation. A little while back he said, “Dad, if I had one wish for you on this issue, it would be for you to forgive yourself completely and never look back.” I'm very fortunate to have a son like this. And you too can follow my son's advice.
Use your past as evidence to inform your hypothesis for how to best manifest the reality you truly desire. Forgiveness is an inside job. It is my job alone to forgive myself.
Whether or not anyone in my family forgives me is their decision, and it would be completely inappropriate for me to ask them to do that for me. I already bear the natural consequences of having missed out on some experiences I truly desire because of anger.
Doubling the pain by beating myself up, accomplishes nothing. When I don't forgive myself, I'm not able to be fully present in the only place I can manifest anything differently the: present moment.
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No one else can manifest the version of me that I truly desire except me. No matter how much forgiveness I'm given. So my best bet is always to stop beating myself up in this moment and start using my past as evidence instead of a paddle.
And by feeling my bad feelings, not avoiding them, not stuffing them, not changing them, feeling my bad feelings so I can process them and then learn from them.
Using what I learned to revise my hypotheses for how to best manifest important parts of my reality as I truly desire. Then testing those revised hypotheses in my life.
That cycle of testing and revising hypotheses based on clear, unambiguous evidence provided by your feelings and by your material reality is a fantastic way of life.
And now, my Quantum Tip. A brief, powerful, takeaway that you can begin employing right now.
I’ve said many times, material reality is evidence for you, and feelings are evidence for you.
Some feelings obviously are not pleasant. Some feelings suck. But none of your feelings need to be taken personally. None of your feelings are indicators of moral failure, corrupt character, or even inadequacy as a human.
Feeling your bad feelings is not cosigning your supposed lack of success as a human being. Do not give your bad feelings more power than they really have.
Confidently feel them so that you can process them and then learn from them. Using what you learn as vital, unambiguous evidence for how to change and revise your hypothesis, for how to best manifest versions of your material reality as you truly desire them.
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I've got two, free, powerful gifts for you. The first is my ebook called “How Reversing Seven Words Can Change Your Life”. The contents of that book are the direct outcome of a forge of immense personal pain and potential personal and financial disaster.
The second item is my emotional reference chart, a hierarchy of emotional states that I was inspired to create by Esther Hicks and Abraham. The very chart that I still use today as I grow my beliefs into further alignment with my desires.
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