Momma Speaks to Malik

going through some challenges right now. I came out to visit her, and we lived three thousand miles away. While I was here comforting her and embracing her and acknowledging her for the gift of life and all all that she has provided. I told her, you're gonna be my featured on my next podcast because I would just want to talk to you about you and about things that I am important to you and what you're grateful for,

what motivates you, what inspires you. When you live long enough, you have a lot of wisdom that you can offer. You have a lot of insight. And my mom's seventy eight. She's been a beacon in my life. She's influenced me in all kinds of ways, and this is an excellent opportunity for me to have a deep conversation with her and introduce her to my audience on Mali's Bookshelf. So this is what this episode is all about. Mama speaking

to Malik. This is his story. I'm about to interview my mom from a podcast, Malik's Book Show, Bringing a World Together with Books, culture and Community. Now I hadn't done about sixty one episodes, but this time I'm gonna interview my mom. So this is his story. This is I'm sitting right by. I flew all the way to Washington, DC spend some time with her, and I just said, you know what, I haven't done an interview with my mom. So I'm gonna sitting here and I'm gonna have a

conversation about my mom. Who's the matriarch and the foundation of our family. And how are you doing? Mom? Praise the Lord. Hello. Well, I'm just excited about our interview. You know, I didn't interview the kids, I didn't interview my wife. Now I get a chance to interview you. Now say hi to my audience at Malik's Bookshelf. Hello, Malik audience at Malik's Book Yeah. Yeah, so glad to be here today because just today I was very sick. And every day it's a new day. Morning by morning,

new mercies up here. So I'm glad to be able to sit up and have this interview with my son. That's Sudden number one, Sun number one. Yeah, this interview is very important for me because you know, none of us promise tomorrow. You know, we give thanks for every day and we do. And I'm trying to spend as much time and much you know, I flew all the

way out. He had been out here about three times in the last six months, and uh, and I'm trying to spend as much time while we're going through this, you know, this bottle and were praying for a miracle and the day, you know, you're feeling good, you're feeling vibrant. And so this interview is going to be historic because you know, it's something that I'm gonna personally cherish for the rest of my life. Something because I'm sharing a

little bit of you with Malik's book shelf audience. So just you know, so my audience can know a little bit about you. Can you introduce yourself, some of the things, some of the accomplishments, and some of the highlights of your life. I guess I'm gonna say that the greatest part of my life, it's being born in this world by my mother Crusade to praise Scott, who hasn't stilled so much of her and her wisdom and to me

throughout the years. Sometimes she thought I wasn't listening, but I was, and she was had a deep, deep spiritual insight, and she shared so many things with me that it is a part of my life today, you know, a part of my life today. You know, major influence. Right. You don't let nobody be better to you than you are to them. I mean those other things that she used to say. So when a person is nice and kind and good to you, you don't forget those things.

You should remember them also, So things like that, It just becomes a part of your life. Absolutely absolutely, I know personally, did Grandmon Scott had a major influence on your life? Entrepreneur? Yes, you're entrepreneur, to go get it. A broker, you know, so real estate, had a daycare, had a used to sell uh, you know, food at events and things like that. You go where there's a will, there's a way. I gotta have more one than one iron in the fight. Yes, so one slowed down and

doesn't work, you work on the other one, absolutely. You know. I tell people all the time now that um, my grandmother influenced my mother and she they were self employed, they were entrepreneurs, and it influenced me, you know. And when you get despair, I got it from them. They passed it on to me. They passed it on to me.

I had strong black women in my life, and you know, and and I think that, you know, I'm so happy I can acknowledge that, you know, I'm that I understand and aware of that, and and you know, I personally, you know, you know, thank God, and I thank you for being a major significant part of you know, with the things that I'm doing today as a book and being not fearful of being self employed and being an entrepreneur because you know, you know, I know Grandma would

always talk about that having that W two, having that W two working for somebody, but some of us not made for that. She pushed us, She pushed you, You pushed me, And I'm pushing the next generation to be, you know, the next generation of self employed entrepreneurs do for self what have you? And so no one can pay you for what you are worth. So when you find out where you need to be in life and what you here on this planet for, and it is instilled in you because we all, we all have have

gifts and talents. But sometimes you don't know where yours lie. You don't know what you need to be doing and what will bring the best out of you. So you have to seek that. Yes, yes, you have to seek that. And when you find that, you found your purpose. That's called your purpose. And when you find out what your purpose in life is, then that can help you to go on the bigger and better things, which no matter how much you work for somebody else, it'll never take

you to that level. A man, that's real talk. There is that because we ask me, um something similar to that. They say, hey, you know, they say, um, you know, do you do you um sometimes feel uh you know, but not having a stable income and by working for somebody else, you know, um, how do you get through those rough times? And do you feel sometimes that uh, you know, the fear set in when you when you know,

hit those hard times because you're working for yourself. I said, you're gonna go through that with any job or any or any profession. They're gonna be highs and they're gonna be low. But the one thing that I know about being self employed, I know that payday could be every day, and I know that that um, like you said, no one could pay you for your work. And so I'd rather work for myself than work for somebody else, because you know, I'm my own boss and I'd rather give

orders and take orders. So so I love being self employed. I love it. And so we talked about you know, you mentioned Grandma Scott being a source and a pillar strength in your life and guides and influence. Now who's some of your role models? Other role models in your life? I'm fearing to think because the only other role models is the Word of God in my life is the

whole Bible to read and understand and to know. And that shows me rod with as far as I mean, I know that m Michelle Obama and all those people are great, and Oprah Win friends all those people, but necessarily spiritually they're not where I am and I'm not where they are, so I can look at them and appreciate their accomplishments. But yet and still I have a different mindset about a lot of things that they would look at it one way and I look at it

at another. So I really don't have a person that I can say, oh, you know, that's fair, Yeah, that's fair. I don't. So what's some of your memorable moments in life. I got a lot of them. Well, just give us three to stand out the most. The time I was sleeping in the bed and my girlfriend called me up and said, come on, come on, go out for a ride. And I said, I'm in the bed asleep. She's on. Put some clubs on. Come on, let's go out for a ride. Say, my friend got a brand new cop

and we're gonna ride down Haynes Point. That's down by the tone grew down by the monument and the and the me Mememorial and all that. That's called Haines Point here. So I said, okay, it was a nice summer evening and I'm gonna get up out my bed, put on me some clothes, and I'm gonna go riding. Well, sometimes you need to stay where you are. And sometimes if you had a really so the wisdom of God before

you made that move. You want to stay where you were, But I said, oh, what's wrong with I'll get up and I'll go for the ride. So I got up, put some clothes on and went for a ride down Hayes Point. And her friend, her name was Annie, and her friend with the brand new car, decided he wanted to test it out and see how fast he could go down the Hayes Point in the middle of the night. Nobody wasn't there. You ain't see a foe but us.

So he put the metal. He put the metal, metal to the pedal, and shoot, and and and and and and then yeah, the pedal to the medal. That's what he did. And then the car went out of control. And then he was going and he couldn't take a Charla. The cod was going, and all the day I could hollow was all Jesus help me. Next thing I know, I said, Lord, don't let the car go in the water because I can't swim. I can't swim. The car hit the tree. Well, it was better to hit the

tree than he hit the water. Nobody really didn't get hurt, nobody got killed. I crawled out the back I was in the back seat. I crawled out crawled out the car and I could kiss the bell. Said thank you Lord, you didn't go into the water. Wow, going to the water and the car can't even Oh Lord, Jesus, I felt Lord. We had no phones, we had no cell phones. We were young people. Was nobody, there was nobody we

could call, and we started walking. We started walking. But that's something I'll never forget and you should wow, because that was again God, m he heard my cry. He saved me from disaster. And I had two babies at that time. I had son number one and daughter number one, m Me and La Donna. Yes, wow, so I what will happened I come back? I never come back home. They when they had no mother, Oh wow, they wouldn't they had no mother. But God let me walk away

from that, and I thank him today. I don't forget. Lord, see some things that like you, you shouldn't forget where you know how you didn't character and brought you through. So that's that's really Yeah. I never heard of story, and if you shared it, I never remember. But I think I would have remembered something like that, because anything where you almost lose your mother, you'll never forget that, you know. I never knew. I appreciate you sharing that story.

I never knew that. Gotta called me up, but I'm in it being speaker, I said, see you later. Wow, that man, that's a that's a deep story. That is, you know, very heartfelt. You know to hear that. I mean, just you telling that. I could feel your spirit and you're choking up and your eyes getting watering. I mean, you know, because so much time has passed since then. There's so many beautiful memories have happened since then. Never right, experience was about two or three, and you might one

or two. So y'all with baby, Yeah, I have left my babies, and now I'm fifty nine. So look at how many years and how many memories, memorable memories have happened since then, and all that could have been wiped away if it wasn't for the grace of God. Wow. Now move into something else. Um, I guess you know that was a memorable event. Tell us something that if you had to do over, you would do over. Well,

I got one for that. I would have worked really, really hard to keep my teeth because back then in the day, they didn't have dentistry and things like they have today. So every time you well, I had soft teeth. I lose a lot of calcium when I had my children. But the only thing that the doctor knew most of the time was put a filling in or pull it out. So the teeth. When you lose your teeth, you lose bone because your bones shrink. When you lose your teeth.

When the bone shrink, then your jaw line and your facial features change. They're not the same because your bones have changed. So I learned the hard way. I learned the hard way. First I was told the just let them take one twothoult because they were gonna fix it. I had a gap, and I hated the gap that was in my mouth because they always said when you have a gap, that means you're a liar. And I did not want to be classified as a liar. So I said, I don't want this gap. I want my

teeth to be together. I want them. Well, they got ways of putting your teeth together there without taking one out and doing something else. So I let him take the toothoul. He shaved the other one down, took one out, and then there was a gap. Then he made a cap to go on top of them, and in time where he shaved the tooth down and other things that just went solid that didn't work, and at time they went bad. So that meant that I was missing teeth temporary.

I was missing teeth in front of my mouth, which meant that I had to go not just get what he had planted in there, put in there, pasted in it, glued in there. I had to go and get a partial denture at a young age. And from then it went to other teeth being missing, having children, losing calcium, losing teeth, and eventually I ended up with three teeth, one, two, three. I said, I'm gonna keep these three. But a lot of happens over the years. Like I said, I'm old school.

I'm seventy seven going on seventy eight. That was a long time ago. As are not like that. So I tell the world right there today, whatever you can do to keep your teeth, do it, wow, because it's a part of your health, it's a part of your strength, it's a part of your looks. Keep your teeth. Whatever

you do. That's my advice to the young people. That's some good advice, because you know, I think that you know it's important for the elders to pass on to the youth, you know, anything that they can encourage and inspire them. Hey, yours is like you said, uh, keep your teeth, you know, man, put your teeth toop. Back to day, my mama didn't have no teeth. I think she ended up with one. Wow. Wow. Yes, yeah, my aunt. You know she was older then my mama. She ain't

ain't no teeth. That's what they did. That's what they did, and that's what they did back the as you say, they ruined the life out of people's crowns, crowns or whatever. Yeah, you know, a smile is contagious. And who who doesn't like the smile showing their beautiful teeth? You know. So, but that's a good advice you just gave. Let me ask you this, then, what are you grateful for? I'm

grateful to be alive. I'm grateful that God has let me live to see seventy seven years and in May, on May to seventeen, if i'm still here, i'll be seventy eight. So that's not long now, that's only like two months away. Yes, right, yes, so I'm grateful that God has let me live through all my sickness and everything that I have endured during this past year because I only got sick one year ago. One year one year, and from one year, I've been back and forth to

the hospital so many times. I've had so many needles. I've had so much over and over again of twos down your throat and and different procedures done over and over again. But God's been good. And the doctors they be amazed because they come and they push on my side and something they said, do you hurt? I said, no, I don't hurt. So I'm thankful. That's what I'm thankful for. The God has still given me life to be able

to still enjoy my family. The all three just that birthdays March the fourth March that was Mollie, Yes, March the ninth, that was my youngest son, Darius, son number two, and then Livednia, daughter number one, whose birthday was made tenth, March tenth. I'm sorry, March tenth. So all three were born in March, Yes, March fourth, March ninth, in March tenth, yes, So I'm so glad that I was able that they were all here, and that's been a many years since

all have been together on their birthdays. So they were able to come together in fellership, one with another, and I just thankful for that. And we recognize you, yes, because it's really you know, your birthday as well, because you gave birth to all of us. So were giving honor and giving you your flowers. And indeed I got lots of flowers, but loose hard because I'm in my mind that's right. So and we want to get honor, you know, right now every day we have a chance.

And let me just say that's about Let me say this about you, know you going through these challenges the last year, these elements, and how strong you've been, how vigilant, how strong your will has been. I mean, you man, you showed me another side because I see you as a fighter. I don't necessarily know if I ever knew

you as a fighter like this. I mean, you're fighting for your life every day every day and I see you holding on and you know, and you're shaking off whatever it is people giving up, but you ain't gave up on yourself. No, No, my hands and God hands, and I say, I trust them and I'm just believe it and trusting and I'm just thank them for every day every day and new day morning by morning, New Mercies, New Mercies. Yes, so thank you. You're a fighter. You're

a fighter. What would you like to say, um to your children? Take this time to you know, to think about what you was, what you want to say to your children if this was your last day? Well, you know what, since I'm doing my own obituary, you learned, then that'll be my cluche touche. Hey man. You know Ladna uh she mentioned that the other day, you know, mama writing her own bituory. I said, well, that's customary when you know that you putting things in order in

case God call you home. Preparing for tomorrow is a necessary thing that we have to do. We all know that life is only a term and we don't know the time nor today when we're called back to home. But we give thanks to each and every day. But you know, you live in life is to the fullest. You know, you got a list of things you're trying to do, um and you know you you're not looking to you know, right now, to leave. That's when that's in God's hands. That's when he wanted to call you.

But you're fighting every day and I see it, witnessing it every day. I'm talking to you. I come home and I see the fight in you, you know, and it gives me strength and I hope I could be as strong as you. When you know, I get in a situation where life is, you know, in the balance. I prayed that God will allow me to have that kind of strength. Man, because a lot of people give up. You ain't gave up. You're a fighter. I'm fighting tough cookie. Yeah, yeah,

Do you have any regrets in life? Any regrets in life? I tell you about my would get out you regreteth the teeth, That's that's regret, getting about the bed, going on the ride. I guess you. I guess I get right. That can compass compass uh that as well. But like um, I think that you know, if you live long enough, you know, you get wiser and you learn things about yourself that um you know. So what have you discovered about yourself these last few years? I don't think God

puts no more on you than you can bear. I think sometimes things come into your life that might not be to your liking. But the most important thing is is to not look at yourself for the answers, but ask for the will of God, because God is all knowing. You might think you know, You might think you have the right answer. For instance, you might think you in love. You might think you got the perfect man. You might and then one day you find out did that man

is out? Did cheating on you? And then you know, what do you do at that point? Do you seek God for wisdom for the point to have some type of a deeper understanding, or do you just say that's it but God knows. Maybe you might say or pray, oh, send him back, I want him back, don't let him go, whether he might not be what God got for you. So if you pray the Gods will, we will be done. In a situation, no matter how you feel about it, the Gods will be done. And if you ask God's

will be done, didn't trust it. Whatever it is might not be what you want, but on you will see God's will was the best thing for me. Whatever happened that what you thought you were looking at or how you felt it was a fleeting moment or just an illusion, and God got. When God give you something, he got something better for you. Trust him. Trust him. What's rightfully yours is never lost. And if that person's gonna be there for you, it's gonna be there for you. So

don't trust how you feel. Ask God's will to be done for it, and they'll never come out wrong. I thought, I thought, I thought that, I mean I not didn't think. I knew that I wanted this job, and I knew there was not many people qualified for this job. And because of my experience in the real estate market, because I had already finished working a complex that was a condos and I knew, you know, about selling the condos, that I was the most qualified qualified for the job.

And that's how I felt about it. Brand new project, brand new job from the ground up. So they started interviewing people for the job, and so I went in for the interview, and I was assured that they're gonna pick me. I got this experience, I got the qualifications, you know, and when it found it, they were supposed to let you know the next day, and I never heard from nobody. So I decided, Oh, I'm gonna ride

up to my office and find out what's happening. So I go up to my office and people running up to me. Did you hear did you hear? I'm like, nah, I didn't hear. Oh so and so and so and so got the job. They're gonna be partners and a team, and they're gonna work the job. I said, oh, that is so nice. My heart didn't feel that way, but I said it. I said it. I said, oh, that's

so nice. So I knew I couldn't stay in there very long because I I I just couldn't take it to hear that they didn't partner up two of the other people that was in the interview as a team and I wasn't chosen. So I still had to have a smile on my face because everybody expect me to have a smile on my face because that's my personality, that's part of my spirit, and so they was expecting it, and I know it couldn't stay. I couldn't keep that

smile very long. So I said, okay, but I'm gonna see y'all later, and I hurry up and ran out to build it. Went down to my car and boo hoo, yeah that disappointment. Boo hoo, Lord, I prayed, I asked you for this job. I was the most qualified for this job. They had to pay them two people just to eat, will you? So I went home. I got out. I felt low. So I got out the car and I went down to the basement to the lord's part

of the house. And not only did I go to the lord's part of the house, I went to the back of My back was up against the wall, and I was like having a pity party. Lord so or some so and so. Lord reminded me, you asked that my will be done in my prayer, and I always do. I said, Lord, that your will be done. We hadn't still been as will were done? Did I accept that? No, didn't come my way my way, no way at all. That's what I wanted. That wasn't the will of God.

So finally my husband came home and he saw me back in the back, came down there, and I didn't want to talk to nobody. I didn't want to talk to him. I didn't want to do nothing. I was just a pity partying and cried and tell him, oh, now I was having to pity party. And he went and he put this. At that time, they was a tape cosette takes, yeah, cossette tape. I don't think it was h rap. Maybe no, these did little little tapes

and caste. Then we moved to the c didn't. He put the little tape in, and the tape was a preaching ceremony about walking on the water. And what that preacher was saying is that I don't care. And keep your eye focused on Jesus. Don't you look to the left, don't you look to the right, You focus, keep your eyes straight on Jesus, because then you ain't gonna see Just look at him. Keep on them, keep on them. Don't look at the noise, don't even here, don't let

him bother you. Look at Jesus. Get up, walk, get up. I didn't want to get up and walk, but I found myself getting up and I was walking. I was walking, and the more I walked, I felt myself being released from burden that was on me and how I felt. Then you asked me to let my will be done now trust me, and I got up and I was able. I didn't want to talk to my mama, and my mama is my ace Boon cool but in my prayer.

But now I didn't want to talk nobody. But I found myself coming up, coming up, coming up, at my lowest point, taking my back come against that wall. You'd have been walking out of it, I said, yes, lord, I'm gonna look at you and I ask that you will be done. And I trust you and I believe in you, so I let it go. Months would buy. The team was down there working months and months no money, months and months and months no money. I was still

making money. They wasn't making no money because construction wasn't going like it was supposed to and they hadn't settled on nothing, and they wouldn't getting no money. Then the company had policy that didn't give you a little something called a draw, but they with so long without no money that draw period it ran out. And the same young lady that they hired to run the project, the snatch man was coming to get her. Call the repot man.

The repo man was coming. And I found compassion in my heart because she she might have been a little bad, but she wasn't that far bad. But she was down on zero. But I found compassion in my heart to give her money. I could have given my money. If I was on the project, I would have been just like she was, working in nothing coming in. And God showed me here compassion. He's all knowing, he knows what tomorrow. Brain. You don't trust them, He know those cases, wasn't gonna settle.

He knew all of that. And then the very partner that she had turned the build up against her and took the builder and with so else. Now, that was a bad situation, but I wasn't a part of it, because God heard me when I said, let your will be done. So what I'm getting today to tell you people is that trust them and believe them. If you ask for His will to be done, then what it happens, And it's not like you wanted to happen. Have trust believe because later on your seat, he ain't gonna fail you.

He ain't gonna leave you, or he ain't gonna fail you. And even though you can't see it at that moment, you will. You will. Wow, that was a lesson for everyone that had so much hidden and on the surface,

that was wonderful advice. You know, as you was telling the whole story, you know, it just made me think about times in my life when I didn't get what I desired and I asked God or something happened to and I had a gift that He blessed me with and that gift was taken away, and how and how I felt and how you know, just how like you said, going in the corner and crying and feeling a certain way and hurt, and how I felt you was making me remember all the many incidents, you know, but certain

things particularly, you know, because they're relevant and present. You know, you made me think about all of those things as you was telling that wonderful story, because sometimes you know, we don't we don't understand, and we don't we're not fortune tellers, and we don't know what tomorrow brings. You didn't know that that situation was gonna happen. You know, you were upset at the moment you didn't get the job,

but down the line it would have bankrupt you. So God spared you from taking the job because you know, if you're done that you would have been financially strained. And sometimes things happen our life, and we don't know to what brings tomorrow. And you know I can relate to that, because you know, I spent many hours, many days, you know, whimping and crying and moaning about certain things, and only to find out you know, later on in time,

because time so to all arguments. So in time I got to know the truth of a situation, because that's the only thing that can really bring a true healing this time. And I found out, you know, in time that why did I even get upset in the beginning, Because the time went by, I thought, while God is the best, know there's a reason why he did that. Because if I had walked down that road, I might not be standing here today. Or if I had, you know, made that decision to do this, then I might not

have the house I have now. It's crazy, but that's you know, I tell you guys, so I can relate holdingly. And I mean I was some great advice and the story you told for Malik's books audience, I know they can relate. And if they can't, they will later on, will later on because if nothing else, life is gonna be your best teacher. But trust in God because we

don't know all things. We you know, we worried about the things that we cannot control, and we have strengthen ourselves not to worry about the things that we control. And when and when we don't get what we desire, doesn't mean it's the end of the world. It's just wasn't meants for you, because what it was meant for you, whatever God give you. You know it's meant for you. And if you don't have say it again, I ask it. What God gives you and it's meant for you. It

is never lost. What's yours is yours on purpose. Yes, yes, And so that I think that that you know, it's a good way to end this wonderful conversation. Um. I have one more question, and that is if you had to sum you up in one word, what would it be in one word? One word? I'm gonna go, my mom will look love, send out as much. Love, be a principal of love, be a love, is it love? Curious everything loved? Loved and fella man, love one another,

love yourself. Hello, love. Well, I think that you've been a testament of love. And I don't say that just because I'm your son. I say that because I've witnessed you over the years evolving into that. We don't always start out that way, but we grow into what we become. And you know, your life has been a testament of giving and of love and I bear witness to that. So that's a great way to define you. Love. And

I love you, Mama, Thank you, baby. I love you too. Yes, I hope my audience enjoyed that I know I did coming and give me an interview. Absolutely, thank you, thank you, thank you. I hope my audience, I hope you enjoyed that you heard a street and you heard it live, you heard it organic, It wasn't script. We talked about many things, so I gave you a look in a window to the spirit and the mind and the heart

of my mother. And so I hope you listen to some of the reveal, you know, things that she shared with us and open up things that I even learned. So amen, Amen, there we go. Thanks for listening to Malik's Bookshelf where topics on the Shelf, our books, culture and communities. Be sure to subscribe and leave me a review. Check out my Instagram at Molik Books. See you next time.