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Well, hey there. Welcome back. Today I'm going to tell you three stories about myself, and I want you to think about yourself. I want you to think about if you are scared to start something that's been on your mind for a long time, or if you're scared to change something that you know needs changed but you're just staying in your old habits or your old situation because you fear that the change or starting something new or the unknown. I see this happen all the time with clients when I'm going to change their food intake or increase or decrease any of their proteins or fats or carbs, because in their mind, they've always done it a certain way and they fear the change.
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They think it's going to cause issues when actually they're hindering their ability to see changes because they fear change. So that's what we're going to talk about today, and I'm going to give you three easy examples that you can really think about yourself and how your fear of starting something new or change is affecting you. First, I want to give a shout out to bookworm 1492, Busy Mom Motivation. I was looking to get back in shape and struggling with motivation on how to keep going. This podcast has given me motivation to keep reaching for my goals and helping me make myself healthier while helping to shape my daughter's future and fitness as well.
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No, thank you, bookworm 1492 for the review. First of all, if you find this podcast helpful, please don't forget to write a review. And it makes me so happy that we can change our mindsets and even our kids mindsets, that we can shape how they look at health and fitness, and it can be really positive and that is so great. So if you have a podcast episode you love, leave me a review, let me know. And don't forget to subscribe wherever you listen.
00:01:46
So all the episodes are downloaded directly to your phone. And since we're talking about making changes, it might be time for you to get a solid, good quality and still affordable pair of sunglasses. I love gooder. For this reason I've mentioned I stumbled upon them because a girlfriend was wearing them at the pool and they were super cute and she was like, they're $25. They're fantastic.
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00:02:32
Good. Simple to get your free shipping again. Remember, 30 day, 100% money back guarantee. You're going to love them. All right, let's get into today's episode and talk about our fear of starting something new or changing.
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My name is Andrea Allen and I am a mother of four girls under seven, a wifey to a mountain man, a personal trainer and a nutrition coach. I love all things women's health and fitness. But let's face it, the fitness industry is complicated and it's not built for the everyday mom. There's so much conflicting information and you're busy and you don't have time to figure it out. I hate feeling confused and overwhelmed.
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So I have made it my mission to simplify health and fitness while creating a welcoming, realistic and empowering home for like minded women. I'm happy you're here and I hope you stay awhile.
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First, I want to say that fearing something new or trying something new or making a change is scary for a lot of people. So if this is something you struggle with, don't feel bad about it because it's really common. Our human nature is to collect information and look at what makes sense and then to fear something that might be a risk. For ages we have focused so much on fight or flight and we've done things to keep us safe. So sometimes we don't try new things because we know what we know and we're comfortable with that.
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So we stay in that comfort zone. That's okay sometimes, but sometimes it causes us to beat against a brick wall over and over and over again because we're trying to see changes or we're trying to improve something, yet we're still doing the same thing over and over, which is causing that lack of change. I see this all the time, as I mentioned with my clients. Oftentimes they will fear changing and adding more protein or more or less carbs. Sometimes they will come to me and tell me, you know what?
00:04:31
Cardio works best for me. And maybe cardio did work best for them when they were in their 20s, but now they're in their 30s or 40s or maybe even fifty s and they really need some weights to keep that metabolism going. A lot of things sometimes change and sometimes it's not even about the activity, but about the obsession with the thought that activity was the only way to make it work or that thing we were doing was the only way to make it work. And that's really not how it works. It's about variety, oftentimes in different situations and just having the ability to adapt.
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Because we're constantly changing. Our lifestyles are constantly changing and our bodies are constantly changing. So we have to change and start and try new things along with them. This can really happen in business, in changing what you believe in general, in finances and changing anything socially. So today I'm going to give you some examples of things that I personally did and feared or things that I tried and stumbled at and the outcome of them.
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So the first thing is this entire episode was built and thought of because I was at the gym. I don't go to the gym too often. I go sometimes on Saturdays when I'm just like, overwhelmed with being at my house too long. And so I normally will go about every other week. And I go to the gym, and there is a machine there that triggered a memory for me.
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And I literally am laughing, staring at this machine. I'm like, you almost killed me. And this is my first story, about five years ago, maybe six, I was working out at home. I hadn't had Easton yet, and I was visiting my sister, and so I went to the local gym because I was excited. I was out of town.
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I hadn't had weights for a couple of weeks, and all my weights were at home. So I thought, I'm just going to pay and go to a gym just one day. And mind you, I had taught at a gym already for almost 1415 years. I'd already been a trainer. I was very familiar with the gym, and at this point, I had a decent following online as well as a certified professional trainer.
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So I go to the gym and there is a machine there that I haven't seen before. Now, back when I used to teach at the gym, there was a similar machine near the fitness room that I used to use a lot, and it was a Hack Squat machine. So it's basically a machine where you load the weight on the back, and then there's a pad that goes over your shoulder, and the machine's kind of at an angle, and your feet are at an angle for a Hack Squat. So it just kind of creates some work for the glutes without some pressure on the knees. And I liked this machine at my old gym when I used to go to the gym.
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So when I saw this machine, I thought, it looks like that, but it's a little different. It wasn't built exactly the same, but I can tell it's similar, and I'm really wanting to try it. I don't have machines at home. I only have dumbbells. And I'm like, this machine looks awesome.
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It's similar. The weight loads on your back. It'll be gentle on my knees. And I was really excited. So I get on the machine.
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This is a pretty crowded gym. I'm there at the hot hour in the morning where everyone is there and all the machines are taken. And I start loading my weight on this machine, and I get under it and I'm like, oh, this is great. And now I know this machine is called a Power Front Squat machine, but I'm loving it. And I'm through my first set of weights, and I go to grab the lever next to me, and I can't find the lever, and I'm like, where is the lever to this machine?
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So I'm feeling with my right hand all to my sides because I thought there was a lever on the side of it. I assumed there would be, and I'm like, oh, maybe it's on the left side. So I'm feeling on the left side, and I'm like, okay, no lever. So I go up above my shoulder, and I'm feeling all behind me and then on the other side, and I'm like, oh, my gosh, I don't know how to get out of this machine. So all this weight is on my back.
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I'm standing there feeling all over the place, and I'm like, It's fine. I'll figure it out. I don't know how long I was there, but I know that my legs were shaking so bad, and I even tried to maneuver and fold my weight out, like, dip one shoulder and turn around and try to hold the weight while I dipped out of it from the front. And I'm thinking, okay, if I do this, that weight is going to come crashing down, and it's going to like I don't know how that works. Am I going to break the machine, or is it going to land on me?
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So I stopped trying to maneuver out the front, and I get, like, back steady under it, and my legs are shaking, and I'm thinking, okay, so this is how I'm going to die. I'm going to die using a machine that I didn't know how to use, that I shouldn't have loaded to the max before I got on it. And I'm sitting there thinking this, and finally I'm like, that's it. You need to let my pride go. And remember, this is a packed gym.
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And I see someone walk by in somewhat close of a radius because I've tried to make eye contact with people, like, you know, the big eyes, like, hey, I need help. Hey, I need help without it looking awkward. Oh, do you see my eyes? Do you see I'm shaking out on this machine? I'm trying to do all the things to get people's attention, and no one is looking at me.
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So finally, I have to yell. I have to yell across the gym at I'm not kidding. A complete gym, bro. This big buff man. It's diagonal for me.
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And I'm like, hey, can you get this off my back? And I literally yell that at him. Everyone in the gym is staring at me, and he's like, oh, yeah, I can help you. And I'm like, I can't find the lever. And he's, oh, it's a footstep below you.
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And I'm like, oh. And I instantly step down the weights off my back, and I felt so stupid. Everybody is staring at me because I'm yelling at this man across the gym. He basically was Hulk Hogan. And I'm yelling at him across the gym, and I get off the machine, and I'm like, okay, I'm just going to rack my weights, and I'm going to go sit in the bathroom and collect myself for a moment because I just looked like a complete fool on a crowded gym floor.
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As a personal trainer with 14 years under her belt, I think about that story all the time because I tried something new and I had experience. I knew what I was doing in the gym and it still wasn't perfect. I still didn't obviously do it right. I had to reach out for help. But I think about that now.
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And even though it wasn't perfect, I love that machine. Now. My gym here has it. I use it all the time. It is one of my favorite machines.
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I love that when I first tried it, I couldn't do it. I couldn't figure it out. I felt stupid. And now I love it. I love that machine.
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And how many things in our lives do we fear doing? Do we not step on or we don't do perfectly and we give up, when really we could love that thing if we would give it a chance and start something new or try something new and step on the machine. And even if you get stuck and even if you have to yell at a gym bro all the way across the room to come and save you from the machine, you'll love it down the road. So it's one reason why you need to try new things. My second story about trying new things or just making a change is when I was in my early twenty s, I really feared carbs.
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Ironically, I went to school for public health. I had plenty of nutrition courses. I had nutrition courses through my PT, Cert as well. And I had hyper focused a little bit on some of the negative sides. And I shouldn't even say negative sides because in general, food is about balance.
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I don't believe in labeling food as good and bad. I'm not on that ship. I believe in moderation. But I had a little bit of the old school mentality that carbs would make you gain weight. And to be honest, I think some of the teachers at the time were still teaching that and hyper focusing on that piece and I believe that for a while.
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And in my middle to late twenty s, I was into fitness. Obviously I was a trainer at the time. I was teaching group fitness classes, but I just was not putting on muscle like I wanted to. And I was killing myself with stuff, just working out all the time and I just couldn't get the muscle definition that I wanted and I couldn't figure out why. I finally said enough's enough, I've got to try something different.
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And I started to slowly increase my carb intake along with my weights, and I packed on a ton of muscle. I already had a really good protein intake, but when I combined the protein and the weights and the combination of carbs, it made such a difference. I already didn't fear fat. I've always loved fat, like foods with fat, obviously. But for carbs, that was one that was fearful and caused me fear.
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And I see that a lot. And clients will come to me all the time and I'll say, you know what? We really need to increase your carb intake, or we really need to balance out this intake. And they will often say, oh, I've never done it that way. When I lost weight five years ago, I did it this way.
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I often have to say, that might have worked then, but now we need to try this. Because body adaptation is real and muscle is built with food. And you may just need some more carbs combined with that protein, because that really is what helps build that muscle. I also often have clients who just will say, my body responds better to a higher fat. Maybe you've always done a higher fat diet and it worked before but you might be spinning your wheels now and feeling a little stuck.
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Hence why they're sometimes coaching with me. And I tell them that thing you think is the only way to work for you is actually what's hindering you. At this point we need to make A, B and C changes. So I want you to think about that story and myself included. I have no issue admitting that I had a negative relationship with carbs in my twenty s and how it's changed so much and how my body's changed.
00:14:11
Because that mindset has changed and I tried something new. And I want you to think about what you are not trying because you fear it or because you've told yourself a story about it or you're looking at one side of something. Maybe like I said, carbs, if you just pound carbs, yes, that can make you gain weight. But that's looking at one side of the story. It's not looking at the other side of the story.
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That carbs in moderation and carbs with protein and fat and carbs with lifting, build muscle and build beautiful definition. And so I'm only looking at one side. When you are fearing change are you only looking at one side of the story? Are you only seeing one outcome? Are you looking at the pros or only the cons?
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If you're only looking at the cons yeah. You're not going to do it, there's no way but you got to look at the pros. Are the pros worth trying it to outweigh those cons that could possibly be cons or may not be for that one? Think about that. Look at the whole story.
00:15:11
Make sure you're looking at the pros and the cons and which one is truly outweighing. The other one. And if it's worth trying and doing some research to learn the whole story and learn the benefits of maybe trying something new or changing something you're already doing. My last story is going to be a little bit different, and it's going to relate to my business. But I think anyone who has ran a business or who is a parent or who has experience in a field can understand how making a change in something you're experienced in can be very complicated and actually very hard to do and to try something new.
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So I started deliciously, fit and Healthy, the Instagram account, about ten years ago. It's actually been exactly ten years, and then I started my online coaching program. When I started the account, I was coaching in person, and then I switched to online about eight years ago, and I was coaching by myself. I knew the rhythm, I knew how I wanted to do it. I had the experience, I had a good system set up, and I started to grow.
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And my favorite thing was helping people, was helping women change their relationship with food, start to love fitness because it makes us strong and feel powerful, not because it's punishment. And I just kept accepting clients and working and I started drowning. In fact, I talked about this a little bit in the stress episode. I just had too much on my plate and it hindered my ability to be present with my family, which is definitely not something I want. I fully believe in family first, and it was becoming very complicated and I thought, maybe I just need to hire a coach to help me.
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And I couldn't bring myself to do it. I thought I knew best. I have the experience, I can do this alone. I can't teach someone to do it the way I do it. It'll just be maybe a burden and I just can keep going.
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I can just keep muscling through this. So I did. I did for a while, and it just was taxing on my family. Finally, one time I had had enough and I just thought, man, this one thing I love, this business I love, and helping people is just smooshing my family. And that's not a great feeling.
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You don't want to feel like that. You want to feel like they lift each other. And I was talking to my sister about it and she's like, you have to stop. You need to make a change. I know that it's scary, but you need to start hiring coaches and make that leap and shift in your business.
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And when she said it, I knew it, and I had said it to myself over and over again, but it was almost like an outsider gave me permission to try something new. And that helped me, but I had to really work my mind around and say, no, I can teach someone how to coach, how I coach, I can get someone who's experienced. And I even remember the very first time I had a coach on my private Facebook group for clients. And I was so nervous that they were going to be like, we don't want another coach. We only want Andrea, and they weren't.
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They were amazing. The clients were like, welcome, we're excited to talk to you. We're excited to work with you. And I was so excited because now I had the ability to help even more women. I had the ability to spread my message even farther because I had more hands on deck.
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And more than that, it makes me chuckle. That before I made this change that I thought I know best, I'm experienced because I have learned more from coaching on a team than I ever would have learned if I was coaching alone. We work so well as a team, and while I have trained them to coach the way I do in a systematic way, we also have different strengths. We have a coach on staff who is a certified hormone specialist. I have a certification, and I have had one of my other coaches take certifications on diastasis recti.
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So we have a big strength in that area. Obviously. I have another coach on staff who lost 100 pounds herself before becoming a trainer. And I often ask her questions about clients because she has been there. She gets that feeling.
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So my coaching program is stronger than it ever would have been if I stayed alone, because I thought the way I was doing it was best and I needed to do it alone. Instead of making the change and bringing more hands on deck and having the ability to not only help more people, but create more of a back system of knowledge with my coaches and that we have meetings, we discuss clients, we will ask each other's advice. We have a really good back system that helps us work together. So it's actually made us stronger, and it's made our ability to coach different types of women in different situations stronger. So I am so thankful that I didn't lean into the no.
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I have the experience. I know how to do this. I'm not going to rock the boat. I'm having success, and I leaned into no. I need to make a change.
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I desire there to be more balance with my work and with my family, and I want a different setup. And I leaned that way because that change has made all the difference in not only the company's ability to succeed and grow, but my own ability to be present with my family. I want you to think of those three examples, and I want you to think about anything in your life. I don't even care if it's fitness or health or anything. And I want you to think for the hack squat machine, front squat machine, whatever.
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Are you scared to try something new? Because you can't do it perfect and you don't want to get stuck under it. It's okay. Do it. You can always yell out for help, and someone will tell you there's a foot lever for the carb story.
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Do you fear trying something new because you're focusing on one variable or one side of the story. Do some research. Make sure you understand the pros and cons, weigh them out, take the leap. Change or trying something new can literally bring more outcome and in that situation, more muscle, which was what I really wanted the whole time. I enjoyed that.
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And in your situation, it could bring whatever you want more of by allowing yourself to see the pros and not just focus on the cons. And in the last story, are you allowing your experience, your know how your systems or the way you've done things before hinder your ability to make changes because you're experienced there. So you're not seeing that maybe this change could honestly make you stronger and more experienced and more equipped and better off in multiple facets of your life. For me in the business, it was better, and personally, it was better, but I had to make that change to see that. I hope you take these three stories and think about them for you and know that I clearly know that starting something new is scary.
00:21:53
Changing something is scary. We do it all the time with clients, day in and day out. We do it within my business day in and day out. We do it with our kids. I know change is scary.
00:22:01
I know you have tons of change in your life, and it is stressful. But sometimes that change brings so much more reward and peace and outcome and feelings and contentment and changes in so many different ways. So don't be scared to start something new. Don't be scared to change your food intake. Don't be scared to try a new workout.
00:22:22
Don't be scared to change your weights. Don't be scared to go to a different workout class. Sometimes people go to the same workout class for like seven years, and then they wonder why they're not seeing changes. You're not changing your workout. You're not allowing your body to progress because there's adaptation.
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Don't be scared in changing your relationships. If you have negative relationships with some people and just adjusting those, you'll find new friends. You are cool. You are amazing. Don't think different.
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All right, that's it for today. I love you. I mean it. And you are doing so much better than you think you are. We'll chat next week.