8:45 Idiotology April 3, 2025

Shortage of dumb people doing really stupid things.

Welcome to another edition of idiotology. Would let your taco one on one one w jr R.

But you're freaking idiots all right? Hey, you still got a roughly fifteen minutes give or take to throw a vote in for you, say we play it this morning. If you haven't done so yet, you would go to the WJR Facebook page to participate. Hailstorm featured artist. Three song choices. I get off the steeple or freak like me. Your votes dictate which song gets played at nine again JR.

Facebook Page.

Somebody who votes has winning a Metallica ticket.

So get that voting.

It's pretty good prize there we do say so or so yes, and we do. All right, get your little dictation machine out there.

The second headline of the week of the day, I mean of the day. Remind I'm sorry, I'm pulling stuff up while I'm talking. But here we have multitasking skills. Are they're slipping? So listen the U remind me of right? No, I wrote the first one down?

All right? You ready? Yes?

Three?

Two machete wielding cinnamon bun Bandit caught mid snack.

It's pretty solid. Now we're gonna have an issue.

We've got a machete wielding cinnamon bun bandit caught mid snack that Bandit would be a thirty three year old Jeffrey d Wayne Bradburne was from Asheville, North Carolina. He also stole, allegedly incense. He was on the weed, cimon cinnamon bun and incense.

He was on the weed. Wasn't he well this incense in the background.

Oh yeah, hold on, I'll get to all of his charges here.

In a minute. I sense that all in a cinnamon bun.

This happened a couple days ago at a store in Ashville about in the afternoon. Clerk noticed the individual attempting to leave the store with said cinnamon bun in incense without paying. This is when Jeffrey produced the machete, and at this point the clerk rightfully made the decision to step back. It's not worth losing, you know.

The clerk would not have had to step back if BWO was in effect there prime example machete machine gun compare and contrast.

I'd also like to comment you have the added situation here that Asheville is dealing with in general trying to recover from the severe flooding from the hurricane last year.

Daughter was just there for spring break. Part of the spring break.

Yeah, that's this is the last thing that people trying to run their businesses need right now. Salt lalland damn cinnmon bun bandit with the machete. Police caught up with Jeffrey a short time later and caught him mid bite in the cinnamon bun. He ended up being charged with robbery with a dangerous weapon, shoplifting concealment goods, and possession of drug paraphernalia. So there you go, ding ding ding ding ding All right.

Now here was my controversy or dilemma that I was trying to get to Earlier. Last week, we had all the headlines of the week and then didn't have them on Friday. Had a couple different listeners text in and say, well who won? Because we never tabulate? Are you gonna have a head onto the week tomorrow?

I haven't prepped for tomorrow's show yet because today hasn't happened fully, Okay.

That I understand. Because I've been at this job for quite some time.

There's two waves of preparation that go This is a little behind the scenes, so y'all, don't just letting you know. What I do is late today, I'll do my first sweep, and then early tomorrow, second tomorrow morning, just before showtime, I come through and get the latest and wildest to have the most up to date and cutting edge morning show presentation. You're gonna fight anywhere in the planet. Oh yeah, totally top notch.

So listen, so we don't run into last week's dilemma, Shall we go over the headlines of the week now and let the listeners vote.

I'm trying to go fast here.

Okay, and then if we have a late entry, we do, we do.

We're gonna do them in backwards order. Uh, here we go.

Shitty wielding cinnamon bund defended caught mit stack.

Okay, that one's solid.

How about this man arrested in Provo, Utah for entering a restaurant fully naked and flexing muscles aggressively while waving a gun. Yes, that was in there too, but uh you just I did.

I did put it off for him.

Gullie. Nude guy flexing aggressively while waving a gun in the restaurant. That's not something you usually see much less in Provo Utah.

You all decided two two five two six. So far that is my favorite, because well, that one's great.

Didn't We have one earlier this morning too?

Hold on, we have a headline of the week, son of a gun. I forgot to write it down. We'll get back to the Oh no, that was the one. I just wrote the headline on the wrong page. See what is going on? I'm asking the same question. You're a disorganized mess? Is what's going on? You?

Ready?

It's because I haven't. I haven't written that one in yet. I just taped it.

I write it in after mysterious poop chucker might be targeting Colorado woman for not picking up her dog waist.

Yes, the poop chucker came into contention in the five point thirty five Idiotology this morning.

Poop chucker or person flexing new dude with gun and a.

Restaurant aggressively in an aggressive All right, there you go.

Those are your three for now.

You decide two two five two six poopchucker, flexer or cinnamon button.

Well, I'll get back to that in a moment. As those come in at two two five two, I want to throw this out there. This sounds like BS to me. I'll run it by you. I'll see what you think.

I just saved you the stress pat of having to have a headline of the week tomorrow.

You welcome. I'm not going to be shy. If I come across one, I'll bring it to the table. A new survey indicates that eighty seven percent of Americans say that getting enough hydration in the morning is important, absolutely right, Yet thirty four percent say they usually don't even drink water until after three in the afternoon.

What hell could you do?

You take it till three in the afternoon with no water. We live in Florida. Maybe that's now still even just whether you take it real good open, I drink coffee that's actually mostly water. Okay, Well, as soon as I wake up in the morning, I need some water. Man, When I do the middle of the night pee, I need water. I almost did that middle of the night pe in the.

Dorm room bed. Now that's your room, man, Not really. I think I'm getting a new mattress for in there. Well you know that one of them? Which one are you gonna go with?

Box in a bed or whatever? That a box whatever the hell is are called it forget mattress in a box.

Yeah, and they delivered that they take the old one right, because I ain't putting that out by the curve. That might be a little embarrassing for you know, from visitors that we had prior to me turning in a dorm.

Room may have had accidents in there.

We got some folks thinking Sharon Osbourne's being a tad insensitive towards her husband who's still alive and well by floating the idea that there should be an Aussie hologram ready to go.

Yeah, I think if my wife was saying that, well, no they would never have a hologram, but I could considered insensitive. You absolutely, thank you. You're the biggest OZ fan. He's first off, Sharon, Sharon, Ozzie's immortal. Don't even have to worry about this. Sharon was living up to the name. Well, Ozzie was sharing her, well, he wasn't sharing her, but he was sharing his wiener.

So she does have that on her side.

The hairdresser, Yeah.

What is it with the hairdressers? That's huga.

I believe Gavin Rosdale as well. Right, No, that was a nanny, Yeah.

He heard it.

Damn it now, it's blowing all my stuff all over the place.

That's just disorganization on your side. You ready, I am?

I need a paper weight all right?

To Sharon?

Yes, in case you're wondering, that's insensitive, Just like that fart that slipped out might have been incensive.

We thought this was maybe an April fool's joke. It's not. On Monday, Dolly Parton announced her own brand of jeans. What took so long for Joline's beautiful play on her classic kid Joline. The pants are available for a limited time through Here we Go, Chloe Kardashian's label. You can get them online and in select Nordstrom stores. They're not cheap.

I'm sorry, I don't see these ain't taking off. Whether you got the Kardashi on it or not. You ready for a total up? Pat? Yeah, give us a quick so you do the fingers of counting them time, just reading them out. But bom naked man, nude flexer, Uh, bye ba bye Flexer, poop chucker, poop chucker, poop trucker, that's what daily occurs. Poop chucker Flexer. We're tied right now, flexing, poop chucker, flexer, flexer, cinnamon. Uh.

That's that's our totals.

Bat.

It sounds like flexer has a slight lead over a poop chucker, although I don't. You all don't be shocked if I bring the heat tomorrow with another one. Stay on demand, download the iHeartRadio app.

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