"Camp Avril" (w/ Jackie Johnson)

in the top ten comedy podcast. I'm tired alitics is really for us to be featured in the new noteworthy And I don't know if we're either of those. Well, what do we have to do to let everyone know we are? We are not worthy? I guess we're no longer new. It's literally some guy at iTunes named Peter. I don't know what let's call him Peter. I don't know what their name is or their gender, but I just I think it's it's literally up to like one person is the gate keeper to all of that. Well,

we need to figure out what there is. No. I'm not I'm not one for like being too politick. E with with with with these people in politics? You have to do whatever it takes. That's actually a rule of culture number fourteen and politics. You have to do whatever it takes. And so I am willing to go do up to and up to a certain amount of physical actually and sexual. I'll say it right here, I'll get

sexual to get us on the new and noteworthy. You're saying this on August twenty one, the day speaking of sex and politics, the day that we find out that Donald Trump directly violated campaign finance laws. So no, you do not do whatever it takes, because people who do whatever it takes and being president and should be impeached and go to prison. So I actually I reject that rule. This is history. How do you know that I wouldn't

be able to get out of even about Jennaker. Out of that I would I would never stop fucking the only thing that we that we have to focus on here. I'm sorry that we're just making this a little bit topical. Ever since the Ombrose episode. We are a political par We're a political podcast now. It's actually rule of culture number three. This is a political podcast now. So I have to say, uh that yes, we're in project We're in Face two part Project to Operation it's really terrible.

Toperation does not roll off the tongue, but eat the syllables. If you would be so kind, especially if you're a new listener, if you would be so kind as to give us a five star review and rating and then review us with some words, we would love it. Actually, what we're gonna do is um and be honest, because we encourage honestly, and we're actually going to read uh

biting lee honest critique. We love this review. It's really good because it's a dead on review and they really take They held us accountable for our ship, and that's exactly right. They held us accountable, but they also gave us the props. They gave us the props, but they balanced that with some venom. And here she blows. So this is from she Blow Geen Gna Ramsey. Okay, too soon, but the title is of corks. You should listen. They gave us four stars. Four let's find out why we

lost a star. Here we go. Such a great podcast. Although, like all great real housewives and drag queens, as soon as they got a little bit gay famous, they convinced themselves that the world wants to hear them sing. But karaoke is easy enough to skip over, and it's worth a bit of scrubbing to bask in the wit and banter. Matt and Bowen have a sparkling tension, but you can

tell they really love and respect each other. Parentheses I think later episodes of feud Betty and Joan, but with less testosterone Alright, Earlier episodes benefit from a bit more focus on the central question of the show, what was the most formative culture in your development, and a bit

less focus on what the title of the episode will be. Similarly, the I Don't Think So Honey segment began as a gutsy and hilarious indictment of cultural wrongs, but has lately lost Steve, becoming a litany of minor inconveniences that happened to either host on the way to the studio. Nevertheless, there's a charm in spades, and the guests are exciting, fresh and rarely straight white men. It's a podcast that sounds like the future of comedy. Oh that's very nice.

Definitely listen. Wow, Wow, it's it's it has it all and I really respect the hell out of Geen Geen g Ramsey. I just want to say I want to threaten all the listeners right now. If you want us to stop singing, we will. We will, and then you'll never hear us sing again. And that's a threat. That's I think. I think for me, it's like you know, it's it's a condition, it's a it's an agreeable condition. But this is all to say, leave us review. Be as honest as you if you hate this. If you

hate us, leave the review. If if it's a complicated uh love, leave a review. Whatever it is, please be sure to qualify it by writing some words like gen Gady Ramsey did it's so fun. We were ending them. Speaking of podcast hosts who often sing on their podcast, we have a special guest in the special guest in the studio and and it's amazing when a podcast crossover happens. Yes, and very rare, but very rare. And but we're honoring this one because she really like she cast a net

by saying, I'm going to be in New York. What podcast should I do? Uh? And then people people recommended us, and I think it's a natural our good Judy over at your Lauren Laptus gave us a big sort of endorsement, and yes, if Lauren. If Lauren's gonna vouch for this guest, then you know why not have her on. She's the host of Natch Beauty and a fantastic pod fab you lust you know what. And also you can have more

than one interest and get your life on this. Oh my god, Like I feel like if you're one interest, like is like like we're just giving you culture. No no, no, She's giving you culture, beauty, comedy, veganism, veganism. I want to talk about also music, also music. She is truly so multi talented it and she does something that I don't think either of us can do. To be honest, well, let's hear it. She holds she can hold water for

a long time. I can do that that and she can hold the space up top and like the opening block by herself and just like go on and be compelling and like that is a skill. That was a very backhanded compliment. I'm saying, neither of us can do that. You you want to test me, okay, you want to take me outside and see how long he gets? Talk? You want to bump? You want you where do you want to bomp? I would meet you wherever and talk. I want to bump with our guests in the best

way possible. So please welcome our guests. Jackie Dan has me a bump let. Here's the thing, and this is an l A girl who's only done coke one time. You've escaped coke in a coke city. I've seen a lot of it, or around me. If I'm being honest, a lot of comedians are poor and they don't afford Yeah, yeah, I did in London when I was twenty two years old, okay, and never going in the back of a club of an oyster car. Okay. And then and then describe the rest of it. What was the give us the I

hated it. If I'm being honest, you have to you have to snort it in my nostrils, in my nasal cavity was fucked up for like a month. That's the part that's I don't I don't think so. I don't think so, honey. Snorting drug no, not for me. I would swallow my drug. I would, I would, you know, I would obviously smoke my drug. Right, we have the technology now where we don't have to do that. I love a good tincture. I love a tincture. It's like um tongue sorbs into your body. I love a good

CBD tink. Oh god, this is the summer of CBD. I think it. Sure is. Everyone get to kombucha. Now they're putting it in boba t there's boba CBD, boba in l A. I don't know this. It just like marijuana. It's it's it's not. There's no psychoactive effect. So it's so CBD is different from THHC and that CBD is a little bit more. Oh god, I'm pretending like I know the chemistry of this same it's not. Yeah, it's what Jack you was saying. It's not a psychoactive it's

more about just the anti anxiety. Okay, maybe it's for pain relief. Yes, okay, I like that. That to me pairs well with a nice tea. Yeah, yes, so CBD. I guess CBD and Indica are sort of in the same think of them in the same way. They're not. I'm not fully equivalent making them equivalent, but that's what that's. I can think of them that way because Indica will suck you up, Indica will make me shuts me down.

That's that can be helpful in certain situations. I guess yeah, I guess you need some rest, turn and mind off, take a nap. Remember like being like right out of college, like at the end of college and just thinking, oh, if I want to go to bed, I'll smoke weed and just get whatever I'm getting my hands on smoking and then up until four in the morning, and like wondering why. But it also it affects you for days. For me, I'm very delicate. You're a very feminine, delicate woman.

She's only three three tall, she's only three inches tall. I'm sitting on a bunch of phone yellow pages. She's sitting on the yellow pages, which which we have of being tiny and sitting on a bunch of yellow pages is what being a woman is all about about. That is, at least a woman in the entertainment and that is uh femininity. That's a beautiful feminine. That is beautiful, beautiful modern tiny. Okay, let's get into this conversation about beauty because okay, and with let me ask this is it?

What's what is the thing about reconciling drugs and beauty is so interesting to me? Right because like, on the one hand, you would think most substances counteract that, and so like I don't know, like is there responsible drug use while also putting beauty as your as your top priority. I think it's all self careen balance and a lot of people self medicaid in many ways with many substances liquids, et cetera. And if you can handle it, then do

you relax to what you need to do? You know, I don't judge, but it's such a thing like the woman who excuse me, I wanted organic apple in that drink. Cigarette smokes a cigarette, smokes a cigarette. It's like, I don't know any maybe maybe uh, I don't know, maybe prioritized totally totally. You know, do you baby about that? So do what makes you feel good? Should I should? If we want to keep our skin? Word like, yeah, that was a really good one. That was hereditary realness?

Oh wow, I haven't you've seen it? Okay, but but I immediately am terrified of tongue pops now, yeah, because it'll change everything after you see it. It's not like there was no Lizza Edwards like master cut with the heredity. Yeah, yeah, I need to see that. And there's there is that there is a cut of hereditary tongue pop. For what do you mean what they did with what do you mean that? And then it's like, don't sing. Yes, y'all are brave for reading ideas reviews. I stopped reading Money

year ago and it changed my life. Oh I mean actually really most about that earlier. They're so sweet. Yeah. For the most podcast reviews, it's like people don't read the comments. But in terms of podcast it is nice to get some helpful critique. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll tell you what's going to happen now now that we've said be honest, they're going to do as a bit, They're gonna do like mean things. Don't now I'm worried. No,

this is fear speaking as an artist. For me, if somebody says you do this too much, you don't do this enough, then it's in my head and when I'm trying to be entertaining that, that's in the back of my head. You two are so fucking good and funny and amazing, and you're bouncing off of each other like versus McEnroe. I just watched that movie because I love Shy McEnroe. Yes, yes, he would be a great look.

He gives you the essence of mcinroe. I recently watched a little bit of have you seen that movie when he was in that large one Trier directed? Um um, I see all this work. Fan of both. Okay, wait, this is my original question. Yes, at the gay club, at the gay discotheque, you'll see everyone drinking of vodka soda and also, you know, universally this is like the

healthy cocktail. Is this true? I think clear liquor um soda water Is that the one that doesn't dehydrate you feels like it would hydrate, So soda water, vodka a line. So we're doing a good thing with yes, yes, and we're I think would be fine. They say yes, especially if it's GMO. Now when when when Matt says they say juice is poison, he means his ex boyfriends, My ex boyfriend has drilled into my brain that all juice is poison because of the amount of sugar that's in

juice and sugar natural sugar, still sugar, etcetera, etcetera. The modern sense of juice is now like, oh, it's it's just the things and the fibers are broken down. But it's it's like he was. He would talk about it like it was as evila soda wo well, I don't know, because I've heard you buy those nineteen dollar juices and you're thinking you're being healthy and then you find out it was like flash pasteurized, so that all the all the new dreams are gone, Like what are we even doing?

That's the thing too, is like it's I fully feel like now like the health thing is like something that they've caught onto, Like that's a trend that they're like they're ruining everything. Just tell people that what they're drinking is good for them in terms of health, like make it green and they will buy it at whatever the car. So that is something I think to be aware of. Yes, yes,

for sure. So that so since you're hosting a lifestyle podcast, lifestyle comedy podcast, like I mean, you have to sort of pointed at point out the ridiculousness of it. Oh that's all I do. Oh, that's all we do. We because I just feel the beauty industry takes itself so seriously and it's also so intimidating, and they want it to be that way. They want you to feel like you're like, oh my god, am I cool enough for that lip? Or like, oh am I fancy enough for

that perfume? Or whatever, and I'm just over here, like, honey, let's really get into it. You test on animals and you don't have no shades. The animal testing is like a pervasive thing. It's so bad. And they lie la la. I thought with Mary Kay and the very prevalent and the big dogs are all testing a big dogs are testing on the rabbits. She's a big offender, big offender, girls.

You know what, I think this might be time for us to change ding dong as an opening ding dong lass cultures calling because we cribbed that from ding dong avon calling. I'm okay with it, okay, all right, all right, So maybe you know what, honestly, maybe we're taking it back. We're taking it back, reappropriate it. I also don't like ding dong avon calling because ding dong is did they actually say ding dong? Well, Edward scissor Hands would, but

she didn't say ding dong. I googled avon calling and Diana came up. But then also like old vintage posters came up where they would include the words ding dong avon calling. So but that was probably just for the post could kind of hear it, right, You're right, you're right right. I have a question, what's the funniest beauty campaign? What's okay? What's easy? Easy? So I don't know when

this started happening, but they sexualize everything. So there is a face mask called glow Job, and I don't remember the company, but they test on animals most likely, so I think it's benefit benefit tests on animals. But everything is sexual. It's like I want my face to look commy. I'm going to cover my face in sucking oil and look like I got cocky. They sexualize everything. Orgasm is

like thenars blush, it's like at the number one selling blush. Ever, that's probably where it started that when I used to watch TV with my dad and those commercials, it would be so uncomfortable, feel like I don't want to be in the room with my dad during for me, honestly, Like I guess like the thing that I always think is so funny and I'm fascinated and by the time I die, I have to have one is like a fragrance campaign, like what with these actresses with these huge

name actresses like running through the street like and it's like like that Charlie Starren where she rips off the commercials are cannon and but the funniest one I think is it's like it's like a movie. I think bas Lehman director now number five. It was No. Number five with number but also Rodrigo sent too. The actor was in it, and like there's a narrative, there's a storyline.

It's very like sort of like they get in like a big lover's quarrel and she like pushes him away and she's like, literally, literally, I can do the whole thing. He's sitting in his like Parisian apartment, are likeever He goes when did I wake into this stream? I was the only person in the world who didn't know who

she was. And it's this famous actress Nicole Kiman running through the street in the gown and the trucks are hunking, and she's like she gets in a cab and he's in the cabin and he looks at her in her eyes and she looks back and it's this moment and she just goes to the driver drive and they go and then it's a love story and like he's asking her who are you? Who are you? And she's like, I'm a dancer. I love to dance. Yeah, and you

need to watch this video everyone. It's a nine minutes on Claire Dulon plays under the whole thing, and then like they said goodbye at the end, and like there's this moment at the end where like he's looking across the city at her in her eyes and she's going into a movie per and everyone's obset with her, and then it just says Chanel number five and it's like, Okay, I love this as a thing. These A list star,

celebrity driven power commercials. You know how much money they drive up her house to get her to do that? Truck full She's truck full of hundred dollar bills. Her agent sends the email, they want you to do this, they Natalie Portman says, no, have them drive up to my house with the money, offer physical cash. Yes. Do you remember the Britney Spears perfume commercial Curious, Yes, pushing

a hunter. Yes, she was strong and once upon a time there and a hunter and then one day, but one day he did something a little crazy and then felt happily ever after. You know, everybody has one. Yeah, that's that's the curious. Never give them a fucking four star review. Did you hear that yeah, five stars, five stars, only five across the ball, five across that game is you're wrong? Do you know what also we have we have? I mean we have the brittany fragrances. We have also

Beyonce heat. Remember everybody had by j Loo, everyone had Glow by Jello. My mom said she didn't like it, it it was too sweet. Do you remember? Do you remember when Gaga was out promoting her fragrance fame and she kept saying, well, I remember the first when Lady Gaga first was famous. There were these stories that she wanted

to develop a fragrance and that she wanted them. She wanted the fragrance to smell like blood and seem then and then um, and then she would go out on these interviews and the fragrance finally came out in twelve I think, and then she would be like she just was insane at this point. She was like smoking weed every day and she was going on these interviews and she was like, I won't and she put on a Madonna accent. She was like, I want you to like

a slut like that. She would go and say the ship and then really god that that that campaign was bonkers, like beauty. I don't even remember that that yeah, yeah, yeah, you guys remember like the tag at the end of the commercials Gaga Lady Gaga like she was full like still in this weird David Bowie fantasy. But um, this is all to say, I think beauty campaigns give us that insanity, right, because you're not getting that anywhere else. Well,

I think that it's important that they feel a little crazy. Yeah, like and they and they can never stand out I mean, we're not going to talk about on the podcast ten years later. And last, I mean, the Nicole Kiman one was iconic. Also one that I liked recently was the Natalie Apartment. Mr. You Are Stuff because I liked the song that they used, which is Escaping Mirror. Oh It's a Piece of My Heart by Janice Choplin. It's really good and she looks adorable. She's giving you junior prom

the best way. Yeah. I mean the joke that I have is Natalie Apartment is like somehow sixteen and Millie Bobby Brown is somehow for years old and they've somehow just like I don't know what happened, but they switched Freaky Friday. They I love that. I mean, Milly Bubby brown is even at the VMA she was she looked younger than Michael Vonatti, who was there. I was hoping the VMAs would come up. Oh, let me tell you what did you watch? I didn't watch. I was one

of the very many people who didn't. But I looked at photos and I feel like I see what I need to see. Well, Mike was Madonna wearing Madonna. It happened with that. Can you unpack her speech? I will unpack it. And it also was gonna be like I don't think so, honey, but I'm happy to talk about it now. I'm happy to talk about it now. Madonna looked like Bartalk, the bat from anastage. That is what she looked like, like if post malone. Yeah, and wanted

to appropriate culture in the worst way. The speech that she gave for Aretha Franklin was so crazy, disrespectful and then like, you're talking about herself. She talked about herself the whole time, you guys, That's what she did, That's what that's what she did with Michael Jackson. It was

so long. Stop letting Madonna eulogize these legendary black artists at the vm as apparently they had already asked her to do Video of the Year, and when when the whole when they showed the clip of wreath singing and there was like this whole picture of her, I was like, oh, this is nice, it'll be tasteful. And then Madonna walked out looking the way she looked and like with the grills in as always, and I was just like, this

feels like a huge mistake. But then also the whole VMA show was like I'm sorry, it was so crazy, warped bad. It was no one available. I feel like I was like this, they were making calls last week,

like they need to fill these thingies. What also was like obvious and apparent is that when people could leave, they left like there was like I think seven major celebrities there in the beginning, and then as the night went on, as they as you could tell, they won the awards they were told they were going to win, they were they were out to the point where the only artist there at the end was Camilla Cabello, which I think it might have been why she won Artist

or in Video of the Year because she was the only one there literally the Video of the Year. All the other nominees were not there, and I was like, do you think it's Do you think she won? Because they all left of the Year for Havana and Artist of the Year Arts. She won Artist. She has one song I do like am suck of Valagimore. Baby a Baby We cannot say, but baby girl. So was this year was? This year? Would you say was a lower low than last year was? Because the last year was

the lowest. This was the lowest, even without a Katie Katy Perry trying to do jokes and ship you wished for. Katy Perry tried to jokes because I'll say this, and I'm gonna get shade for this, but I'm gonna say this, at least she is not a comedian and was bombing. They opened the show with Kevin Hart and Tiffany Hattrish and they couldn't land joke. It took Tiffany Hattish forty five minutes to get to get to some of these punchlines.

I'm telling you, it was a mess. I don't know if like the prompter was up, was was off, or like or maybe she just really has that much difficulty reading off a prompter. Remember her her doing the Oscar nominations, but it was embarrassing, and Kevin Hart was just as bad. And then literally every center that went up on that stage it was like everyone was blind up there. It was I mean, and also not even just that, but the performances like I don't know, I am just old

now I guess who the fuck is Juice World. I didn't know who half the people were. And it's depressing to me because the MTV was so important to me and them as the pretty much every V until like three or four years ago. Yeah, and it's depressing how far we have followed. It's horrible. And then like literally the most the thing people are talking about the most is how long and boring and inappropriate Madonna's speech was.

And I was like, this is like it's it's and I think it's generally because no one cares to be there. There were some highlights. Nicki Minaj's performance was unbelievable. Okay, he is great. I mean, Jaylos was was pretty good, but but it wasn't like Beyonce performance. It wasn't um, you know, all these things. It just it was like really like, well, all right, newsflash everyone, and you're brushing your teeth throng. Hello, this is a news flash. Hi,

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what else do you want us to say? It's an amazing electric toothbrush, it's sensitive to your teeth, it does it the right way. You're gonna enjoy using it. Everyone else does. What the heck? What the heck get equip dot Com Forward slash ding Dong, Campbell Brown? Would I say? We uh, we get a hint of MTV from Jackie? I think it's time to ask the question, Jackie, what was the culture that made you? Culture is? For me?

This was such a struggle. I had dinner with my husband two or three nights ago and I said, I need to pick a culture for less culture reas we can go through more than one. I was going to say SIMS culture because I started playing the SIMS in two thousands and have still play it to this day. You're ere up to four and now are you still playing original? Well? I am now on SIMS free play, which is the iPad version, but I've been playing it

for five years. Don't get me started. I've done, but I've I've talked sims pretty heavily on other mediums, so I don't know if I need But here's the other here's the other ones I was gonna say. I was gonna say pop punk culture, meaning like blank, but then my husband was like your opposer, and he was like, throwing me some bag. We're going to talk about all this. Yeah, now that you said it, now that it's a right. But then then I was going to do vegan, but

vegan talk and throw people. I don't. I want everybody have a good time. I party with the vegan. Yeah. But the one I really was going to talk about was maybe it's gonna be a curveball. But I am the biggest dog freak dog love dogs. All day long, I was teased by dogs walking past me. I didn't touch a single one. I didn't get to say hi to them. I don't know if it's different culture in New York. Like one lady literally yanked the dog away from me and I didn't even touch it. I just

said hi to it. I want to meet every dog. I don't care if a person likes me, but every dog needs to like I want to meet the dogs, touch the dogs, Hug the dogs. I have a dog. My dog is my best friend and my everything. I love dog people. Dog people are my people. I love dogs. You love dogs? You love dogs? Dogs? Do you have a dog? Yes? And what kind of dog is? She's a mix? She's a Maltese Cocker Spaniels shit sue two Asians. Okay,

and then what's her name? Her name is shooge. Y'all would flip out podcast a visual meaning can you pull up a peck now? I really want to. I can't believe you'll have it? Hot producer Joe producer Joe has a dog, Polly. There's Choogi on the beach. See god, huge, just choo a little, just choo a little color color on huge a colored tail and in this photo colors colored ears. But we only do her tail again. Wait,

that's amazing. I've never seen a dog with color come to l A goes to the most renowned dog colorless, colorless. So is there a person that that does like are they a hair colors? Like for humans? Dog colors? That's unbelievable. That is the most called creative grooming because it's done with very specific ingredients that the dog can't feel. It's vegetable pigment basically mixed with conditioners, so there's no chemical reaction,

there's no treatment processing. How long we'll stay died, till it till it grows out, like till it fits well, if I give her a bath all the time, it eventually will fade out, but pretty much permanent. I mean,

I love that. I love that it's that that it's an ethical thing, because that is I mean, you know, people don't realize sometimes maybe because Lena Einbinder will say this to me, like they say, uh that you know it's fucked up if you you know, miss gender your dog or if you like just do all these things to your dog, things that your dog has no no saying, like those are off limits. But as long as it's something like the fact that the dog can't feel these

chemicals is huge, that's great. I hear that. I mean, I have such a hard time watching movies and seeing animals in them because they don't know that they're on that mark. They don't know they're not getting paid. It's like when you see somebody like really pull up on the horse or like the horse falls. I just I just get so upset. I mean, and it's not it's

all animals. Anytime the horse is nahing and like the legs, I'm like, well that animal can't be like it's not like taking a cigarette after this and being like, I don't know, I thought I could have given one, right right, Yeah, it's it's you know, is there is there any way to do not that, not that you know, but like, is there a responsible way to do that? Well? I mean, you know, I used to walk dogs. I used to

be a celebrity dogwalker. Oh, we're gonna get into this, and my boss was a dog an animal wrangler, and I know how it works. I know, you know, so some are treated better than others. But that at the end of the movie says no animals were harmed. It can that can be completely bought When you see the Pinnacle for me, yeah, when a horse falls, like no, I hate it. That's why I love that c G.

I like a Game of Thrones. They it's all c G. I really yeah, I'm pretty sure they might do some stuff standing on the horse, but like, I don't know, I don't want to small anything. But there's like big battle scenes and it's all faked. I heard today that, Um, it's interesting you bring that up because I heard some ta about the Final is a game of MS, which is that they just shot like the final battle sequence

and it took fifty five nights to film. You know, they fake, they fake, they shoot fake ones too, and they said they were shooting three fake endings. Oh my god. And they said that it's like it's like a revolutionary, like um way of making sure there's no spoilers. They only sent out digital scripts that the actors only have a few hours, so they have to learn their like

dense dialogue in a few hours. And then the second after um, like the scene was done shot, like the scene would it would not even self delete, it would disintegrate so that it just was never there. It's like a program that they're using where they literally the script only exists for a few god, and you can't even like screenshot or anything. Wow. Um, okay, we need to get into if we're allowed to talk about this dog Walker to the Stars some of the clients. Okay, so

I was again thinking about this. Okay, so there are big people that you give him. I'll tell you off there. But I was thinking it'd be fun to reveal one of my big clients. I've never said this. Um, I can say it because I never saw anything. I used to walk Josh Groban's dog. Oh my god, is he is? He a nice guy? So nice? And he is dog Sweeney, a wheat and terrier. Shout out to Sweeney. I love Sweeney so much. I miss him. I haven't seen them in years and years, but like, that's my dog right there,

so much. Okay, it's so sweet. That's great. Nash is very similar to Sweeney. Like they're both kind of I don't want to say dopey, but like lovable, like a little lovable, sweet shaggy doll. I love that, you know what I mean. And ultimately it's extremely talented musicians, both of you. Yeah, yeah, I bet I between a musician for sure. Now this is my thing with people who

dog walk. I have friends who dog walk. I would It would be the hardest job in the world, rules because I would develop attachments yes to these these animals, and I see it like Lena, I'll name drop Lena again, Lena. Hi, if they're listening, Um, Lena seems to really bond with these dogs, and I'm like, I can never do that. It's not that I have the opposite experience, but like the dogs I've walked, maybe they're not good. Well yeah, my dogs were all Like I said, I worked for

a trainer. My dogs were so well yeah. Well also, you know, I think those people really cared for the dogs, and you know what I mean, like put a lot of time and I dogs had for this one dog that was just awful. I have had a few awfuls, for sure. They're celebrity awfuls. We won't have to name the celebrities, but there are some awfuls and celebrities. Everyone has an awful obviously. I want to tell y'all so bad. There was this boxer who tried to ruin my life.

Oh my gosh, I can't win. Boxers are supposed to be I might be really wrong, and there aren't. They supposed to be mostly well behaved, though well don't. Boxers are confrontational, which doesn't mean a bad thing. I almost wish I had more assertion in my personality, you know, because I'm very like passive aggressive boxers. If you say, hey, funck you go, what the fuck you say? They will

never turn the other cheek. They will come front. Do you find that most of the stereotypes about these certain dogs are true, like our pit bulls, like a little edgy or dalmatians a little edgy Um. I only worked with one Dalmatian ship all in the back of my car. Pits. You know, I'm not a breedist, so I will never say that pits are dangerous. The problem with pitts is that they Number one, our society has told us they're bad, So when they're around people, tense up, they feel our energy.

Number Two, they can get over stimulated easily, and that stimulation can trigger their prey drive. So, but that's not even for all pits. And that's true for a lot of breeds. That's true for bulldogs, that's true for poodles. It just it's a personality trade. It's not a doctorate. Three. It's just really sad that, you know, inner cities and they're not educated about training and neutering and spading animals. And then it's you know, it's it's just sad because

pimples are very they can be very sweet. I've met some sweet yes, it's just people you have never I want a pit bull. Oh my god, have y'all seen what is that? Lady on the on Animal Planet with the people Rescue. Why can't I think of the name of it? Pa, God, it's the best show ever. Okay, this bitch, this bitch on here. I can't think of her name, and I feel so bad. She's this this liked leather. She's seen some ship in her day. And what does she doing on the show? What's the show? So?

She is a woman with fully grown children. She runs a pit bull rescue in New Orleans, and she only hires x cons as her employees. And she says, just like pitts, these men have bad reputations and we're turning it around because it's all bullshit. Everyone deserves a second chance. She is a tough ass. Bit we need Tia torres Tare. She's like Icon, She's giving you fucking Reba meets Jill Zarin got locked out of the house. She's bad ass. I love the show. I love this. I gotta watch.

Everyone deserves a second chance. Our prison system is fucked. You're stripped of your of your individuality. You're not mentally rehabilitated into our society. She says, I'm gonna get you there, I'm gonna get you a job. I'm gonna get you on a schedule. I'm gonna give you value to your life in Dogs and the Men Bond. It's healing, honestly. Is it a new show. No, it's been on for like. Why have have they optioned this for a movie yet? I would watch this. I want Amy Adams to play

Ta Tarres. I see you, Taures. Yes, and love that go to hell Now now Joe has part. Producer has never brought in Polly and I can't. That's so Offensive's baby. She's old and foreign and it's far. She's old and it's fall I've seen pictures of her in the studio though. I want to meet her too. She's chilled. Polly's chill. I want to I want to drive to New Orleans and adopt a pitbull from Tia. I've said that a

million times. She's so strict she would get in a van and drive to l A and check my house herself. I mean they don't funk around. Yeah, No, these dogs have been through enough, honey. They've been through enough, honey. It seems like they're on top of it. Ta ta At pit Bulls and Parole check it out. I think we got it. We can we can network at My dad would love that. And you can buy merch and support them and send, you know, donate money to them. Oh I love that. So I haven't bought one, but

I would love to. I want. I want to ask about we We've talked about the two piece, the pit Bulls and the paroles. We haven't talked about the other two pies, which is pop punk. Yes, I'm going Dad Dad Earlier round and going Dan Slaying. You recently said in one of your episodes that this is maybe your favorite song of all time. I think it might be. It's so it's like it makes my heart sing, especially now like with some distance on it, you know now

as an adult woman, I really it hits me. Dat boy holds up the largely hold up, and not everything from that time period holds up, you know what I mean? Simple plan hold good. Charlotte doesn't really hold up. Although I actually kind of liked their their later stuff. Yeah, I liked put up your hand say, I don't want to be left. I don't want to. I just read their Wikipedia page because my husband I were in the car and we were debating, like what was their breakout song?

Like what it was? Little things? Little things? I didn't even remember that. And then we went through the whole discography of that. Yeah, the second that was their second, That was the second, Yes, telling you you know what good Charlotte does have some good stuff. They're touring and let me tell you they look good. Those brothers, oh my god, the one that's married Chi. I saw him at Menchi's Yogurt with his two kids and he was like serving me sexy dad, like helping out star, helping

out Harlow. And with the reveal with the yogurt, there you go. And with with the reveal that Nicole Richie gets it, maybe we have to give that Madden some credit. Maybe he gets it. Maybe he does. They seemed I could never get a read on them, like if they were good people or not. I never liked them. And I have a very specific reason why because the one

that was dating Hillary Duff at the time. Duff at the time, like Kelly Clarkson, like was was also a big pop star and Hillary Duff was a big pop star. They actually were kind of competing pop stars at the time, and he said something shitty about Kelly Clarkson and you never, you never, you never disrespect her. But in my eyes, that's our first American which is also why I have a que just taste for and I have a passionate joy for the fact that she's not doing well. Is

Avril Levine? Okay, what are your thoughts for Kelly? And she was sixteen? Man, break right. I knew you would say that you don't know? Have you near the hours I spent sobbing to her first two c ds? I would follow this room up, Jackie, Can I tell you something? Her second album? Was it called Again or something like, um, it doesn't matter? The one with don't tell Me? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What's it called? Why don't I know? It? Has? I

see the I see the CD. It's black with an ex only listeners are screaming on us through hold On, Hold on That second album under My Skin. So that album back in the age of you know, disc commands and all that I was in China for six weeks, was any of my family was bored out of my mind and my sister and I which would trade the disc man and we would play that was like one of our three CDs that we had. I know that album top to bottom like the back of my fucking hand.

Oh my god. Wait, don't do this, don't do this. Wait, no, fuck, I know. I just know every chord to freak Atlantica. Okay, hold on, how does it start? Hold on? Hold on? Okay, Okay, I'm I'm cheating a little bit. But while he's doing this, let me say why I'm so hurd about al. It was at the v m as and know what I'm talking about. And if you don't know, here's a short abridged version. Kelly and Justin Guarini were finals in American

and they were the top two. They were giving best New Artists evelivin one Evlievin came up and Kelly went to hugger and Avril literally took her arm, lifted over her head, took the award from her and like pushed her out of the way. Basic. But don't you think that was like part of her image or sound? But I mean, she she was it does I I she was a teenager man. But here's the thing you've done. Teenager Amy Fisher and she that long island Lolita shot Mary Joe Budafu go in the face and she was

a teenager too. And if you don't know what that is, but it's because you're from Denver, you need to read a book. Teenagers have to be held responsible for their actions, go to prison and a people in Denver sit read books because living in Denver precludes you from me. You don't know about the long Melita, Amy Fisher, No, I don't care. Are you joking? You don't know about the li on Melita yea and yang. Okay, this is such a good I think I heard. I've heard like this is.

This is a Tanya Tanya Harding level thing of culture. Okay, I've heard little like I She's They're back in the news though, because Mary Joel Did you see Mary Joe was just on Meg and Kelly come up on Stern a lot. They come up all the time. So as Stern is still talking about these people. I mean, if it comes up, it's like the way that John Benny Ramsey will still be on the cover of the National Inquirer. But because I was Johnny Ramsey, this was just as big,

if not bigger. Do you remember the rain of Bobbitt grew up? You need to know your these because I was, because I might have been in Canada. This Amy Fisher was even earlier. Alright, But let me explain to you what you will be obsessed with. So along on the Lda, Amy Fisher was seventeen year old girl who was having an affair with like Joe and he was in his forties, like he was like a dad and his wife has

named Mary Joe. So the one day Mary Joe is in her it's like after the kids have went to school, age three days left, where where in Long Island is that let's let's just say let's just say, let's say um. But so she's at home one day, like minding her

own business, being a housewife. The doorboat rings and it's this teenage girl with that gutten The gun is not so they proceed to have fifteen minute conversation where she says to her, my little sister is having an affair with your husband, and um, I just wanted to tell you that. And they have like a fifteen minute conversation and towards the end of it, Mary Joe was like, who are you? What are you talking about? Like you

gotta go, like I'm going back in my house. Amy Fisher pulls out a gun shoots her in the face. She s vibes. The next day she's able toify identify this girl, and then they find out that she has been having an affair with She posted her sister, though at first know she posed as her. Know, she said, I just want to tell you that my little sister has been having an affair with your husband. But this is not the same. Oh that what's listen? It was?

And so then where the lion that comes from is you found out that she was having an affair with a man. And what she tried to say as her defense was that he was paying her and told her to do it to kill his wife. And eventually, years later, years later Mary Joe divorced Joey and now they're like tabloid figures. In fact, they tried to Joey and Amy Fisher tried to pick the reality show together like ten years ago. Well, he was doing, she was doing. She's

a tam girl now, I mean that's great. Drew Barrymore played her in a TV movie. How did I know about Not Real quick? Larina Bobbitt slice her husband's deck off? I know about her? You know about this Bob. It's an icon, you know. Yeah, we all know about Bob Okay, but that's that's it. Like a crazy teenager shot a woman in the face. Al didn't shoot anybody. Can I just say I have on good authority that Avril has a comeback coming. That's all I'm going to say, and

I'm here for it. On Okay, I'll say this resuscitation. I'm just kidding. I love Average. Here's why it hurts when she did that. I was so hurt because I loved Average. I let that go. It's it was more than when people show you who they are, believed you. Who said that people who show who they are believe them, believe them? Is that somebody on Tom Model? Yes that

was that was actually season one? Yeah, I saw her the Nelsalon wants Tyra car I see all the Next Model people at my commercial auditions and it just breaks my It's like it did nothing nothing, there's just guessing one of the name. I mean, you're only outlets for for after you leave that show is now to like your Instagram sells skinny tummy ta or just like be a. She's not even a real housewife. Fucking what's her face? Well know she's getting added to the main cast of

Real Atlanta. She'll fitting great, great, But on the most recent season, there was one girl, um I won't name because it's embarrassing, but she was then seen training at our friends restaurant afterwards, like, you know what, it's hard out there. It's hard out there, hard out there. But also man, it's hard out there, and you only get so many chances Avril Levine, So I don't not hug my girl. And she she struck once. That's one strike, one strike. I think I think you need to second strike.

Spitting at the paparazzi. You need what she's what she is right to do. You have to balance out against all the good will, the good she's put out in the world. Her second album, Take Me Away, Why does it starts go away? To describe it, it's there inside I do is high said it. We'll just go away? What you do you do? If you know the pain? She's right in my range. Yeah, it was ripe for so she must be a go to karaoke for you.

Happy and well okay, So I was in a pop punk cover band called punk Rock Barbie, and you must have recovered some reharsonal I did skater Boy and Happy Ending, Happy Ending is so good. It's so good together is so good. Don't tell me he wasn't. Now, Okay, you have to admit, Matt, can you can see that she's a good songwriter. I can. I can see that she can write hooks. The lyrics are literally bad. If you look at the lyrics from My Happy Ending, they don't there.

It's not English guy. I mean it's bad. But I do love. I'm with you, I get my life time with you. I think I'm with you holds up definitely holding on from aragon, I think, and don't forget. She also Real Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson's true. Um uh, yeah, so she ended up writing her song, but not on purpose.

You know how that works. Yeah, but then she must have had something to be like, Okay, fine, you know what, I'm going to investigate that moment further because I don't feel it's okay for me to comment not knowing the full story and seeing the footage myself. I mean, Kelly has commented on it in the years ensuing. And then you know, I'm from Dallas, like Kelly. I saw the American Tour the first year in my home town of Dallas, Kelly's hometown. But you know what, I'm I'm sick of

her trying to act her she's a comedian. Can you just I know I don't find her charming. I don't find her charming. I'm sorry, okay, find her charming. Here here's the thing. Here's the thing. Here's here's the I not angry, yes, because I don't know if it's the right decision for her to be doing the daytime talk show thing. It seemed to be doing the personality driven things not too much. I think that in small doses it's great. I have a concern, and please everyone understand,

you know, I say this with love. I have a concern that she'll oversaturate this thing of Wow, what a down home like fun like just like us kind of person.

You can only take so much of that. And I also worry sometimes when she um talks about like politics, only because one time she supported Ron Paul and I was just like, I know that she's you know, from Texas, and I know that, like she's a not not not necessarily a Second Amendment queen, but I know that she's you know, n RA and like all these things, which is which is you know, it's your choice, but something she's a member for a Russian op. It's not the

run for Russian money. Oh yeah, let's yes, stand Kelly, go keep going. This is kind of what I mean. Okay. She should be known for her amazing voice. Yea, and so should Avril. No, she doesn't have an amazing voice. Yeah, sure she does. It's nice and to know that you are there and then you are being you are holding a fucking grudge and you need to let it go like the second second. Yeah, there is this weird double standard here between Avril and better shut the fun up.

And I'm gonna point you in your face because how dare you when she said super cow? You know that that appropriate appropriated? Want to understand what you want to know something? I didn't even fucking care when Hello Kitty came out. I didn't care it was called Hello Kitty, I mean, and it was And it was not a proud moment. That's not that's not a moment on her trajectory that I would like to highlight. Come Kitty Kitty, so pretty. I will say this is not defending her.

I'm just saying she's huge in Asia to this day. They support her and keep her afloat. And so it was. It was a marketing plois wasn't the right one, but like it made sense for her to write a Japanese song. All I'm saying is just keep your eyes peeled for the next few months. How much else? What else do you know? We need to know? Jackie. I will tell you off the air, this is a celebrity. She's being her covering the tracks. We're getting more tea from Jackie

than we are. He call my publicity. I can't afford the public are kidding me? Can I can? I brag real quick? So I had a birthday party last year. It was a pop punk a day party. It was nobody likes you in your thirty three and we all wore like two thousands clothes and I got sent a birthday video from Avril. So I'm on her. I'm a stand I'm not going to talk bad about her, you know. And and there's an evil video in my phone and

in my heart. Oh my god. So let's just say I track her career closely and get excited because her next song I think might be big. Here's here's what I Here's what I'm feeling right now. I'm in it, really conflicted, in like really troubling place Jo because she's a member of the n r A because the Russian op. I feel that you were a bit a better. We don't know every every club. Avril is in bitch. I

feel like you have been a better friend. That moment was you aren't defending Kelly Clarkson so hard against your best friend who was holding her. Did you see her do that? Like, sit down, be humble? Medley? Yeah, come on, why there for me? The charm isn't there for me? I think, oh, Grey, you know you're funny. I don't know, it's not stop trying to make it happenings comedy career. I don't think so. American America fell in love with her for her personality and her voice. Yes, I think

she has an amazing personality invescent, beautiful, it's fun. But I agree with you, like I don't know if the talk show is the best use of energy when we could be maybe focusing on the tour, you know, focusing on I even think the voice is great. I think she's good on the hotastic you know what I mean. I'm excited. T oh, yeah, who wouldn't she just one? Ps though? Christina? I mean, if I was on the voice and there was any option, it would be Christina.

She shades the Voice Now, Yeah, she doesn't like it at all. She's like it became like everything else. She's on record saying like it became like everything else in this industry. I mean, how many more has anyone come out of the Voice. I mean there's an issue there, there's an issue. Then here's my thing with the Voice, though I don't think any and it's I feel this

way about singing competitions in general. Now they don't mean the same thing that used to mean, whereas like American Idol used to be if you want you were a superstar, or there's just not that big of an audience sing where there's so much distribution of views now and I feel like now what the Voice does and what American Idol does is it gives them a credit like that then allows them to pay their bills singing like none.

They can tour, you know what I mean? Like, I feel like if you leave one of the lot of them go to Broadway. Yeah, and if you leave one of these shows, you know, we were just watching Dave Ariel and I were watching videos last night after the v M. A is Diana de Garmo. She's hot. The children have forgotten she can sing. Yes, she looks really good too. I saw a pot of her and I was like, yes, girl, and I bet she pays her birth singing. So she asked to look look at it

like it was a success. So yeah, are you Kelly Clarkson level? Are you carry Underwood level? Even like you know I love her carry Underwood? You know she's a problematic one too. Yeah, what'd she do just being a country singer? Problem? But Jesus, like the wheel life anthem, Jesus saying the wee Jackie, can you give us hor chates? Can you give us some hint as to the musicality of the next overall single? Or no? Like what what? What? What it's gonna sound like? What the sonic quality is?

It's that you're keeping it that close to the insider info. I can't my god, it's from Camp Averall. It's from Camp Averall. Camp is the title of this up. Let's just say I'm really good at googling. Yes, honestly, when you when you google the I found Shila Bout's address, nur, when you google the pop star that's how you know? Now, God, aver I just really quickly, I I am I'm with Jackie on this, I'm team Avril. Uh. The different language versions of Girlfriend were iconic. There was a there's a

Mandarin version of Girlfriend. She she recorded him, she recorded French, Spanish, Mandarin, and there was one more. But it's just hey, hey, you you bean or no gusta Totovia or Tonovia or But then for the Chinese, for the for the Chinese, you want to know what she did? For the Chinese version did not stick to the original melody. Here's what she goes, here's what she does. Hey, hey, you you what she does? She sings on one tone. It's just one. I mean, you know, she wanted to be respectful and

it was a hit in China, So there you go. God, honestly whatever, like Avril, I never knew where let's see what's gonna turn And this is not where I thought it would Listen this, I mean, Joey bought a few go to long on to a career mishaps. I mean what we talk about dogs? No, no, we got into dogs. Well was the first thing that you said? You said, Oh, what was it? Oh? The sims say all the time. But I was like, what did you play for parade? I played for real I would waste the hours I've

lost to the Sims truly insane. And then I tried to I have the SIMS three back at home, like at my apartment, and for a while they're like when Facebook was still like a viable thing. I would go on Facebook five and I figured out the way to go live to do like basically a twitch stream of me playing the Sims and just me taking me taking crowdsource suggestions about what to do next. And it was

a huge failure, but you know, I would thanks. Um. I only got as far as like this mother and her daughter living in this house and the daughter sleeping with the mother's boyfriend. It was it was juicy. I would always just put in the secret code. Yeah, and then just like you to make the most a lavish house, and then like just try to have them fucking a big house. The house is now, they're going to fucking the billiards room. Let's make them fuck in the bathroom.

Only they can only suck on the bed. I know I would put a bed in those rooms. I think they could suck in the jacuzy remember the sex bed that was yes, and it vibrated sometimes if you would put them in that bed. The baby would immediately like the little um, I remember that I got a kid now. I also loved hours playing that game. However, like most of what's occupied in my mind during that time is roller coaster typeoo and I would all the time. Yeah

I love those sandbox games. They're good, Yeah, they're great, But the sims like you really it was actually a pretty good like writing tool because you would just you would just like be like, how do I want to function? Like, It's just it gives you space to be to like project all your It was a good like it was. It was also like a morality thing, you know, because for me it was I was my first reaction was like I want them to be the mayor. I want them to have a life, I want them to have

nice things, I want them to be happy. But then there's pretty minutes like I'm going to draw him in the pool. Yeah, you know, like it's like such a duality of our minds. It's such a weird god thing, mini god complex that it was so fun to um set people exactly. Yeah, honestly, to like if we could go back and look at the houses that we created, it would be a wonderful eye back into our personal style. At the beginnings, I remember I used a lot of

chain of friends. Oh yeah, I know what you're talking about. Carpet there was like a rug at the time was like shake the chic and that was like the peak. And also this was around the same time period that we're talking about, whichever, all three like this was around this time was it was a beautiful time? Were you were you like in middle school? High school? Then? Yeah, high school? So I think I graduated. But I don't like about my age. It's fine, but it's such a

beautiful time. It was beautiful. It was truly beautiful time. And honestly, I always say the age of the metrosexual. Yeah, did you find yourself dating a metro sexual man? You know what is so tragic? Every guy I've ever dated has been the same person, which is what just like a white guy with my own hair and like medium build and like not necessary what what what kind of like flavor are they? What do they serve a in terms of flavor? Well, I like, how did that personality taste?

Sense of humor? Intelligence, being a good person, being self sufficient. He's a I used to be teacher and a writer. I amazing Yeah, he's like a master improv improv visor. What's his name was? His name is Adam A Cave. Yeah, yeah, we know of him, don't know he's on bang. We have never had we've never had the distinct pleasure of meeting Adam. But when you're in l A, we're going to meet what y'all were in a LA because you

did gave you had gave her song? We were. We were in l A for a bit, yeah, and then I went back. I returned. We can announce maybe prematurely on the pot be back in December, maybe for a live show. Yeah, oh maybe not. Maybe it's happening confirmed. I'm just I'm teasing. Yeah he was teasing, but I'm not teasing. And maybe maybe Jackie you can do it. You'll you'll have to come on attribute we wanted to love. I got I really got ready today. I listened. I was,

I put you on. I put on a cheap face max from a skin sheet mask remember now fetters, And I was like, I'm ready to talk, talk to talk about I have a question. Okay, So I do want to make sure that we asked for some beauty tips. Okay, yes, then I need to do my I don't think. So we're getting okay, all right, but he's turn he get your hands off of that, and Mike, don't turn it to are you? How dare you? Joe? How dare you?

What are you asking? Just y'all are so special? What I'm telling you, I just like I said your versus mac Androw, I think Matt's mcinrow Yeah, because I get really angry. Yeah. And meanwhile I have a Swedish simplicity. Yes, but it's beautiful, Thank you, thank you? All right, Well this is good. What were you going to ask? Here's what I'll ask. Okay, So I'm lucky I have, I

have good skin. I've never thank you for saying I never have had a problem with my Yeah, and I think that I thought I found like the key to maintain that, which was coconut oil. And then I was told do not use that on your face. And and here's the thing, almost like psychosomatically, here's what happened. I have been like shaving a lot more because a friend of mine said you look better unshaved, better shaving than unshaven.

I was like, Okay, I'm gonna trust this person. So I've been shaving a lot oftentimes when I shave, like my skin a look at its best that day or the next day. And so what I've been doing is I've been putting a little bit of cocon oil on my skin too, because I figured, how could this be bad? And everyone has been complimenting me on my skin lately. After I put the coconut oil on, then I was sitting in the makeup chair on the product I was doing, and the makeup artist was like, I don't even have

to do it too much to you. What have you been using? And I said coconut oil, And she looked at me with panic in her eyes and said, don't use coconut oil. It's gonna clog your pores. The next day. There's a little pimple right here. So I think, is it psychosomatic? Or is coconut oil not good? You know, this is a debate as old as time. Oh my god, along with you know, religion. I thought coconut oil is invented two days ago. It's right up there with religion.

With religion, and you know, the wars and the wars, there's I've heard coconut oil oil create a barrier, so it actually won't it won't let moist you're in as opposed to moisturizing. But then I've heard it's great. You know, it says on the little bottle it says use um hands, face, feet, body, and I'm sorry it doesn't say face and the one I have. And then I was like, but it's been

working for me. And then literally the next day I have like a because maybe it's too aggressive for your face skin, which is I think, don't put it on your face, Okay, alright. However, a lot of people use it to remove their liquid lipstick or their I make up,

So if it works, do it for you. But I think it's too thick of an oil for your face and your skin isn't oily enough, like my skin is super oily, and so I feel like it would like I've started to use oil cleansers every now and then, and I found that it's better at just still moisturizing while stripping down dirt like you don't have you like your skin is pretty. Here's what I want. I want just something that's gonna like make me look fresher because often times, like if I I will get the bags

under my eyes. Yeah, it's hard to get away and I like, that's what I'm looking for, making more kind of like youthful appearance in your eyes, brightening, brightening ceramony, vitamin vitamin C daily or no daily, And isn't like like a rub like um it would? It depends on what seram you get like um. I always ask price point, like are you a Sephora girl or you a Target girl? You know what I mean? Okay, because I was gonna say drunk elephant, which is Sephora? Okay, I'm gonna write

that down. I love that name, I know, and their packaging is so cute. In terms of target price point, I would try yes to blueberries you know, yes too. You know they have yes to carrots, yes to me, yes, cockies, they have them all, but I think just make sure. But I'm pretty sure the yes to blueberry would be a great like antioccident one and it's like eight dollars it smells, don't know, I can't wait. And you can target scrubs. I love like um, like the kind of

like salt like scrub in the room. Yeah, what are your face? Yeah? Yeah, I like to put in my face. It makes me feel sure. Yeah, I love that too. An invigorating scrub, but don't don't expiate too much. Well that's again, that's another because men, I feel I can handle it because your skin is different. It's just a fact I heard for real, U does a hardcore exploiation every day. Wow, and he looks like and he looks fantastic.

It does, Jackie. I I don't want to just like hug up at this time of your advice, but I would love it. This is why I live. Okay, come on, this is this is this is I have the shiniest face in the world. Even even if when I do switch to an Weil cleanser, it doesn't make that big of a difference. What are you using daytime? You're doing a moisturizer doing. Here's what I'm doing, okay, because they make great like oil Control style, even the oil Control

I'm like, is this real? I'm doing just a Now, I'm just doing a basic natural like Alan Green tea whatever. Whatever the heck face wash cleanser tone good. I'm happy to hear that. Then I'm gonna put I have every now and then twice a week, I'll put a little bit of essence on and then do um do moisturize. I'm sticking to the Korean stuff, yes, like the route at least the routine. Yes, And I can't tell if it's working. Like I truly don't see a difference. There's

nothing discernible for me. No, I don't know, like like I don't know if I'm still shiny and stuff, and like I don't know if like is do we supposed to be good? Because do we for me is like extra shine. Well, that's the thing. The grass is always greener. It's like, oh, I wish my hair was curly and versus I wish my straight. I mean, I'd kill for ade. Honestly, at this stage, I would kill for a dude. When I was schlepping through New York earlier today, I was like,

I'm doing. I felt sweat on my face. I don't sweat really that much. And oh my god, I'm doing right now, you know what I mean. Okay, So I want to recommend something for you, please. Okay, she's looking something out. Well, I'm gonna go on nashview dot com because this is the best resource for because what happens is my guests come on and then you can search anything. I don't know that the website was this much of a source. It's a whole blog. There's don't play. It

is a brand. And basically I've had guests on and that had oily skin and then they here we go, you have been good. I try Yeah, yeah, we try to keep it um just interesting, fun fresh. So all kinds of people, but then some indie brand owners, some makeup artists, some comedians, some actors, some artists, some writers, but just all types of people, primarily women. But we just try to you know, I like everyone's opinion. I don't want to just have on people who want to

only use what I use or whatever. You No. No, I have people who don't even wear makeup come on and they go, I think this industry is bullshit and like, you know whatever, and I'm like, cool, I want to hear about that. Yeah, Jackie's a pro. I'm trying to find this one product for you, especially if you like Korean honey, you're gonna love. Oh, here we go, there we go. So my friend Amie Spalding was on, Who's cute is a bug? She writes a bug? She writes

lgbt um pre like what's the young yellow day? Ye? This is her new book right here. Okay, let me find this product. She have you ever heard of castr Rex. No, it's a Korean brand. But the thing about Nash Beaute is I try to only talk about Quelty Free, like we were talking about on animals, and unfortunately Korea band

animal testing band. But if they sell in mainland China, then they are then they test on animal's part of it's like a part of the you know, it's it's I think it will change though, because more people are getting wise to it. She So there's some Korean brands that test on animals, but there are some that don't. Cost r Rex is one of them that doesn't, and you can get it at Riley Rose. If you live in a metropolitan area, then Riley Roses like the new

cousin of Sepphora. It's like all cute millennial and whatever they have costs are x there. They have like moisture pads, they have essences. They have the best sunscreen, because are we sunscreen boys? Honestly not when I don't have to. Yeah, I really need to. We need to one, I'm telling you, especially in New York, because it's all the toxic crap in the air from our from the cars and everything coming at us. Okay, I'm fine. So you're here in

New York and are you feeling like like yes a lot? Okay, Mire at oil Control Matta fire O SPF fifteen which isn't n F SPF if you ask me, um, but definitely need to get that one. And then the costs r x um Aloe soothing sun sunscreen SPF A plus plus plus. What's the p A. That's the uv A

and the uv B rays. If you're buying a sunscreen that doesn't have p A plus plus plus on it, it's not doing anything for you because it's not blocking those U v A. Okay, there's v A n u v B. If it says broad spectrum, that's not to say broad spectrum SPF p A plus plus plus plus. Here's something, here's something I want to know. When are you putting on too much stuff? Yeah? Like, yeah, I

want to know. I want to know that because honestly, like I know that all this stuff would be good, but how many like like even like you know, stuff you ingest like too much? Like what's like, I guess everyone's different. Listen to your body, Listen to your skin um. When you do skincare, you're supposed to do um thinnest, thickest,

so that your face absorbs everything. Right. If you ever do a skincare routine and your skin you feel stuff on it afterwards, or it's like you can see it peeling under your fingers, you didn't do it right, or something's not agreeing with you. So just it's all about trial and error and having fun. But there is a routine, like you were saying, there's a few clans, then you tone, then you serum, then you moisture, and then you do an oil after if you need one. But I think

you'll don't need an oil. But but it's sing before moisture them before oh an I cream after toner because if you put too much shit, your I cream will be blocked. And I'm trying to get that I air. Ye look at snatch, yeah, and it looks snatched extremely it's been this has been I've been up since early hours and she doesn't look she looks fresh, and I try to keep fresh. You know. You know what I did when I was home because my parents just had it lying around and I was I just read on

some block to do it. Um. I did just pure Manuka honey on my face. Very moisturizing, right yeah, time minutes watch it off. My skin felt like a baby's ass. It was amazing. It's a very hot product right now right and and ingredient and you eat a spoonful of it and like a cold goes away. I love it. I need that. It is like a miracle thing because you know what I woke up with today. He made a fire. He made a fire fire and maybe we'll go we'll we go to Whole Foods after the spye

some minu ghuney. We're gonna get someone new County after this, when we're gonna get third Avenue. You can go down down that way. I'm going, Dad, Wait, I want to ask Jackie one final question before we move on. I don't think so much, I really because I admire your lifestyle so much because on top of all this, your your vegan and I would imagine that it's so exhausting having to like curate your choices, um and just have

to research everything that you consume. But so and so is the way to sort of like combat that, like just to like find joy in that research or that's beautiful? Well, I I always say on Nash, do your damn best, do your damn best forgive yourself, love yourself, live your life one day at a time, and do your best. So it's so crazy the levels of veganism and how deep you can go. Yeah, you can just decide one day like I'm done eating me, I'm done eating dairy.

And you still wear your nikes, you still um, you know so many things. You still use nutrogena, what tests on animals, whatever, So there's so many layers to it, and it's just it gets really crazy. So do your best in terms of cosmetics, like you just said, Minooka, honey, I don't use my new you know what, because right right, I do my best. Um, it's hard, and I've learned.

I've bought things on accident. And then I get home and I and I was about to like write up about it on ashvie dot com, like oh my god, this amazing new brow product that I got at a vegan retreat. And I get home and there's lanelin in it, which is um derived out of sheep's wool, which I'm like, I don't really want that on my face. But also I don't like the idea. It's fine, you know, the wool industry a whole other thing. So I was like, well, funk, I'm not going to shout this out, but I'm not

gonna throw it away. I'm gonna use it till it's stunt release release. Forgive myself and for having one week minute for not googling it before I bought it, even though a vegan fu recommended it to me. Whatever I'm saying, there's so many layers to it, so everybody do your best. If you really want to do be all vegan with your cosmetics, you just have to only buy from vegan brands. It's the easiest way. How long has this been an

interest of yours? Like beauty in general? Like, well, I was raised by a very glamorous my mother's like well glamorous from the queen. So then, like was it was? It? Were there pageants? Oh yeah, yeah yeah, pageant You have a pageant background? Oh yeah? Wow? Seriously, well, well complicated, complicated. Basically I was a singer as a child, and I was really good. I mean, I've posted videos of it

that I would. I wept when I saw now because it's just so powerful to see a little girl singing a song about heartbreak so earnestly literally has no idea. I was three. One of my favorite things, three singing crazy about Patsy Cline at the stay on one of the most I'm telling you so like it's powerful. So I was. I was a good singer. I had a vocal coach, and she was like, oh, you should do

pageants because her granddaughter did pageants. And so my parents were divorced and busy, and they were kind of like, yeah, sure, go take voice lessons, do that, get out of the house. I'm busy. So I just started doing them. But I was kind of like little miss Sunshine, Like I was kind of clueless and and and was always the one with like the crappiest dress and like you know, and the award for the child who got the least help

from their parents Lasa Simpson. You know. Um but it was interesting and I look back at it and it's crazy, you know. Um My mom, I'd add a lot of curlers. I wore a lot of girl you know. But it's you know, it's a thing that's crazy. I don't know, it's it's easy for me as an outsider to romanticize all this for you, but you know, yeah, but that's you know, but then I sort of caught you where you are too. I guess I don't remember enjoying it, but I'm but I'm sure I did. It's on some

level because why was I doing. I could have been like I would rather sit home and play the SAMs, you know what I mean. But I wasn't that deep endop. My friend was like little miss Texas, this this, and this title trophies taller than her crowns that would hit the ceiling of this room. I mean, she was like super into it, and I feel like always seeing her and then I would always win talent, but I would never win overall ever, and I was it was kind

of shitty. It felt shitty, you know, honestly. Okay, here's the thing, Jackie, you're out there Texas Pageant circuit. When in talent trophies you have that in common with Beyonce just like I mean, listen to But it set me

up for all this. I love, like I love the idea of like accessible glamour, yes, and everyone deserves that and finding how to get that in your life and what you how when what you want to use and not use in tracking that and just doing what makes you feel the most beautiful on the inside and out, and that beauty is for you. Anyone else is for you. Oh I love that. So that's kind of what nash

beauty is. And that's and I just love Nashvie. We mainly talk with comedians, you know, and and my friends and my friends that are actors, and I'm just like, so, what are you using right now? I'm using this why, I don't know. I've been using it for eight years. Does it work? I guess, Honey, I can find you something that works better than contests on animals that you know, supports women of color, you know, all these other things, and that's kind of what it is. Just having fun

and also a word commonly, honey. We're all talking about that you were you were honey. My fans are called the Honeys. They named themselves that. Well, that's why that's why this was. This resonates so deeply with me your work because I get it. I almost bought a shirt. Have you ever heard of mystique Boutique? I saw it on I walked past it. It's on Canal, It's kind of in that area. But I went in and they had a shirt that said, honey, did you go shop my size? Yeah? I kind of just went around. They

I gotta I gotta salt bagel with vegan schmir. I love a love you, thank you, because we need to we need to legitimize salt. Big. I agree. I didn't even know they were saying. My friends that live in l A, they're from New York, they should always buy bagels and I always eat them. And I was like, what is this? Because I am a salt for I love. I add salt to almost everything. Oh yeah, we're a little sodium little boys. If we got if we get into the restaurant and there's soy sauce, it's on. Yeah,

my sister as she's listening, hyang. My sister will always always get on my case about before I even taste the food putting salt on it, just like why are you doing that? Like you don't have to do it. It sure does, sure does, now just a little bit on top. And also when people I know I have my I don't think so honey, never mind, Okay, I just want to say, Jackie, that was a great answer

about realized amazing that that that was. I love that answer about about your approach to veganism, or just your suggestion to everyone to just do their best, because even at whatever layer they're at, we all know how fucking horrible it is. By now we all know, you know, there just the world. Yes, you have to be blind in death. Yeah, and all the reasons because the environmental

impact the health. We all know. That's because it's hard to recon rehabilitate your brain and life around this entire new set of principles that we have not been told our whole lot. I mean I grew up in Texas in the nineties. Yeah, you think I don't know my way around the chili's menu? Yeah? Way? Was there recently documentary with nataliemportment that she did h yeah? Uh? Eating animal, eating animals, Yeah, I haven't seen it. I don't need to. I don't need to, Like earthen things, I don't need

to see because you're aware already. I don't. I know it all. I know it all. And there's a ton of docks, cowspiracy, cow spiracy we gotta watch, but I mean they're all great. Eating animals is specifically about factory farm and they focus on factors and you know all that already. I just I don't. I don't need to

see it. It will only upset me aware, But I was just and I think the point of the documentary is what sort of what Jackie is alluding to is that any level, any layer you're at in veganism, you you will make an impact in some way. And that's just just be down with it. Like I have friends and family members who literally won't eat a meal without meat on the plate. They won't and do you. But I think I'm I'm just down if you're down to like go get some with me and like you know

what I mean. That's just you know, a little little differences every and make a little change that goes along way from all the vegan restaurants out there. Cute as hell, delicious eat tasting cute as hell by Lizzo. Okay, tasting cute as hell. I've been having the most amazing like vegan food trip around New York. My Honey's gave me tons of rags. There's some diner in Brooklyn are meeting while Yes, that sounds so fun. Yeah, that's great to

give back. I just need somebody to tell me they're listening. I went, you know, I'm tangible. This this is totally doesn't feel like anyone's listening. But then, but then the people who do are just the best, um and great vegan restaurants in Montreal. I went to one with Julio and it was delicish, remember you, yeah yeah yeah yeah. Um. Well, anyway, I think it's time. I think it's time for I don't think so honey, So Matt and I will go first.

I don't think so honey. This is, of course, are our minute long segment where we take one minute to really on something in culture. And I would say, we're you know it thinks to John Guy Ramsey in that review, we are we're returning to form here. John Gane, by the way, needs to be a writer if they're not wonder beautiful beautiful, beautiful pros beautiful pros and honest, okay to right for up rocks or something. And also, just

by the way, f y I you guys. September two, we are at the Brooklyn Comedy Festival at Brooklyn Bazaar doing I don't think so honey alive with some talent to be announced. We don't yet have a time, which I think is bizarre. And this is the tea but we'll find out. We'll find out, then we'll let you know. Okay, So, Matt, I think you have one. I think it's so funny that you said we're going to be turning a leaf on this episode because of the review, and now we're

I think I will be. I will be biting. But this is Matt Rodgers is I don't think so, honey, his time starts now. I don't think so, honey. People when I'm out with you at dinner and I put some lemon on the food, and you say, why did you do that? Because lemon is good, bitch. That's why I put the lemon on there, because to make it taste better. If you're gonna have a food or a fish, especially fish without lemon, you're fucking sick. I want lemon all over my food, honey, in fact, drenched like like

Shelly Winters and the Posse Sidon Adventure. I want to see this fish drenched and learning. And then don't take a tone with me when I try to elevate your dying experience with your nonsense. You know what a bland faced? Sorry, do you know what what a plain fish taste like? A bland fish? You need lemon, especially on your fried food. You're fried fish. Are we allowed to eat fish with no vegan vegan? I don't think so, honey, Um, no lemon. Okay. That's one minute Matt had to ask the question, is

fish okay to eat for vegans? I agree? And also line, if there's a lime, I'll toss that, Honey, I will put lime all over. They need to put more than one wedge. More than one wedge. Hold me a whole handful of wedge. If I have wood in front of me in a lime thing, I say, I say thanks God for the lime. And when there was a story, a news story that h a few years ago, we were going to be low onlines because of the situation. Yes, that was a dark day. I was like, we need limes.

Can I tell you something? Do you'll remember the like avocado epidemic? You know why? That was because McDonald's came up with a new sandwich with avocado on it and it caused a world wide shortage. I thought that was a cartel thing. No, that's not what I heard. She's got inside Jackie. Jackie's got camp sources all over McDonald's twitter. Honey, Oh my god, I love that I feel that my I don't think so honey. Was good for the first forty seconds, and you know it was pretty I loved it.

I like that for the love. UM, don't think so honey. Okay, here we go, I got I got it. His time starts now. I don't think so honey. MTV, Oh yeah, that's right. I'm coming after all of kom No, not not all of ICM. We love Comedy Central, such great program, But MTV, you were like this cultural paul in my childhood, where kids at school I famously did not grow up

with cable kids at school. Your social currency was your knowledge of whatever the funk happened on the Hills the night before, Bitch, I did not blink an eye bad and I when they announced this faux Hill's red breathe, it was happening. Okay, here's here's the deal. Whitney's not coming back, Lauren's not coming back, and what that other

fucking Kristen. Okay, but listen, also, I don't think so many the Hills, bitch, what a fucking nothing show, fucking bland milk toast as show and which nothing ever fucking happened. We did not know why Lauren and Heidi gone to a fight right second. Fuck MTV, Fuck the Hills, fuck the vietnames and fun the Vinas for enabling people like Madonna to do to dress up like a fucking post Malone doll, and death the Creator read his name one

minute in an hour. Thank you. Um. Here's the thing that that I want to say about the Hills reunion. What I said, it would have been the funniest thing ever. If they all came out on stage and said, everyone, we're happy to announce the Hills was returning and Elsie wasn't there, and they said, and it's true, And if they all moved to the side and in the back of the door came open and a bigger fanfare that j Lo got. Elsie. You walk down the stairs. Everyone's

in the audience screaming. Beyonce's on her feet screaming and crying, and Elsie looks so beautiful in a flow length gown and she's like, that's right, I'm returning to the Hills. I said, that should have been what happened, okay. Um. I used to always see them at the clubs when I do. I used to always see them at let do I remember moving to the city when the city was coming out the City's really nothing happened on that

because she was nothing happened in her personality. You remember the Hills or the Laguna Beach theme song, um, let the rain fall down and wake mares, let it wash show away, because I want to hear that. I want to let the rainfall down. I'm coming clean, I'm coming clean. That's that song actually had a good like Yes okay, but that chorus could have shaved off that last I'm coming clean. It's was indulgent. It was indulgent. I mean, it all comes back to Hillary Uff. That's real number

twenty nine of culture. It all comes back to Hillary Duff. And also we can never forget um the Natasha, Yes, thank you, okay. So this Jackie john I've done some, I've prepared, If that's okay, Come on. This hits my process oriented centers so hard. I love this jockey. This is Jackie Johnson's I don't think so, honey. Her time starts now going to bed without taking your makeup off, I don't think so, honey. I know you're tired, I know life is hard, but take five minutes and take

care of that damn face. Do you want to attract eyelash MITESA google it sweedie, grab the cleanser, wash those dead skin cells off. If you don't, boards are gonna clog. Skin is gonna be dull. You're gonna get wrinkles because sleeping and makeup breaks down your skin barrier and ages your face. And you know how you've obsessed. Our culture is second. As Heidi says, one day you're in and the next day you're out. Youth has wasted on the young. Don't be lazy and don't take your youth for granted.

Do a nightly skin routine and if you won't, at least get a damn makeup wipe and drag it across your face before going to bed. I have six words for you. I don't think so huh. That's one minute. Triumphant, beautiful, beautiful. That was amazing, and that's for everybody. Yes, an educational above all else. Did you know about eyelash mites so they we have to talk about. We have talked about

eyelash mites. That sounds very scary and threatening. They are called follical mites and they are on all of our faces right now. Oh my god. And if you don't wash off your makeup. Then it makes them way worse. If you ever see like little rednesses around people's nose and eyes, that's probably what I'm telling you. They're in our follicles. They mate. They they're fun in our heads, sucking in our eyelashes. They're meeting their soulmate, they're having children,

they're raising families. They have full lives on our face. Yeah, yeah, that's where I want to live. My airbnb is basically an eyelash. Where are you saying? Lower side? Oh and then that's an eyelash hunting. I don't even know what that means. No, here's the thing. Can I be vegan but also eat deep fried eyelashed mates? I think we can make one one exception. Yeah, well, you know there is something to eating bugs because it's a more sustainable

protein source. And you could argue that they don't have like um is, dracrine systems or something. Yeah, you can argue with that. So I don't know there is something to that. I feel like someone's asked me before, like would you eat crickets? And it's like I don't need that. But if we ever get to a point in society which we will because you're running out of our resources. If we need a sustainable protein source, then maybe I'll bust out some crickets. I don't know. I mean they

don't have right, I don't know. I was going to say soul, but endocan system as well. I fucking love this episode. This episode. Let me tell you something. It actually I think through conflicts through the age. That's like we came together, absolutely, and I think it's a historic episode because I was forced to admit some of Kelly's faults. This is this is huge, Chuck. I mean Kelly doesn't even writer her own sounds. Yes she does. She tries

half of them, roughly half. She actually wrote my favorite song that she does, which is actually the song that we're gonna close out too, because we close that every time with the song. But here we have to say, subscribe to Natch Beaute and be listening to Natchaute and be on nashbute dot com. Because it sounds like there's something every I love. Oh god, I love a good If it's a funny beauty blog, I'm down. I'm sold. Sounds like you're sounds like you're going to be a consumer.

Are you going to be a honey. I'm gonna be honey. I think we are. I think honey, we're honey. This is my favorite Kelly Clarkson talk on. She wrote these words because I want you to know that it doesn't matter. We'll take this road. Someone's gotta go, and I want you to know you better. I want to so already gun and I guess it'll be easy to skip to the karaoke parts if you didn't like that, gen Gencone noose By. This has been a Forever Dog production executive

produced by Brett Ballum, Joe Cilio, and Alex Ramsey. For more original podcasts, please visit Forever Dog Podcasts dot com and subscribe to our shows on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Keep up with the latest Forever Dog news by following