"American Idol: The Finale" (w/ Anna Drezen)

Why why did I get a TikTok? And then explain how it feels when it hits your taste buds and how it makes your mouth feel all right, So this is of course the winter green flavor here right here we go m a blast of fresh air like like some culture, like good culture, and less than two calories permit to we should say that this is amazing. It's something that makes your breath feel better, it makes you feel good, makes you feel like ready to take on the world, and almost no calories. So there you go

tik taks. Guys. Today we are joined by a great friend. Um, let's look at this list of credits. Let's let's go through them. Honey, let's go through the bit. She's an editor cracked. She's an editor cracked. She formally worked over at Reductress and really helped to make Reductors of the amazing, the amazing, amazing, amazing place for comedy that it is. I think you read Reductress headlines, you're reading Ana Dressin's voice. Yeah,

sure are Um what else has she done, honey? Well, she's a member of the sketch group Gentleman Party, well known over at the Pit. They travel everywhere. She hosts open Michelle at You See the Ease and he's open mic. We love it. And my favorite, she's the co host with good friend of ours Joe Kim Booster over at Videology every second Friday of the month. She hosts Fuck That Movie, which is really one of my favorite shows

of the show New York and I love it. And her name is Anna Dressen, Hianna Puppy here, and I'd say she really does like a little piece of poopy because we put her in this crazy fucking hat. It's a turd hat. It's a little turn They wore it back in the Turkeys and the nineteen on a Scandal, Notes on a scandal. Don't get the reference. I feel like I'm in a BBC mini series that's it about

like women who bleed out after botched abortion. That's so basically no, no, no, it's you must know now, you must well even if you don't know now, you must know for future. So notes on the scand Judy Judy, it's about when she sucks a teenager notes, okay, and so Judy took notes. Yeah, actually the old she said, scandal you take notes, and then it's no note book. She took notes on the scandal that was happening because she's like an old lesbian who wants Cape Blanche at

all for herself. And then at the end there's a great scene where they're living in a home together because the press like is hounding them because they found out that cap Lenchet like Fox Kids, and she the actress.

We know she of Blue Jasmine fame, she Fox Kids, but the character was fucking teens, and she's like putting on all this makeup because she's like really depressed in the house and she's like trying on, trying on all the clothes and the house she's so bored, and she stumbles upon Judy Den's diary and it's like an obsessive diary of her, and there's an amazing and there's an amazing scene where she runs out into the street and she says, you want to fucking me Barbara? And that

to me is that's that's an addresses brand. That's literally me, you want to things have gotten so bad. No, you don't leave the house and then you run into the street and aggressively scream for people to fuck you to the name Barbara and I don't like taking nutes. When a great scene she lost the Oscar to Jennifer Hudson, Wow, you that was her. Her whole family would give her the oscar. She they killed her family. They were like,

we'll give you an Oscar, but family. And she was like four years later and find she was like, honestly, that is that it like to pay something. They're like, no, would you would you accept an Oscar if it meant one or more of your family? You got to go, Who's oscar? You're You're very own oscar with your naming grave. Donna would get an Oscar for a musical. I would win Best Musical, Best Supporting, I won Best Musical. I would do it myself. I would kill my family. I'm not.

That's basically an egot because it's on TV. The Oscars has never been nominated for an Emmy, which is insane to me. That's true. The Emmy Awards has never been nominated for the for the Emmy. All right, you think that they would figure it out that they should award themselves. But you're the best musical. Oscar is the equivalent to an ego because it's on TV. There's music, and um, it's it's a musicals and it's a musical. And I'm not following the logic because how do you win the

Oscar for you because it's already an Oscar? To get it? You get it? Matt would would you? Would you accept an Oscar if I met your family members dying? Um? No, I would? I would. I would gold glow, get it out of here. I want to globe. Wouldn't it be nice to to win an award that was paid for by your representatives? Okay? No, train back. I'd love a Weinstein Emmy turned back and turned back, turned back. I think you're saying I want to Weinstein. I want to wine.

Throw your weight wine on me. I want one okay, speaking of Jennifer Headset, the reason why, uh why Lost Culture Ristos gathers bi weekly is to talk about the big cultural events that have been happening. And I wanted to discuss the end of American Idol because I feel like it's you know, culture dot com, that's American Idol. I mean, it's crazy that it ended like that's a big time. But then I heard from Bowen that he actually he said, quote shockingly, I don't I've never watched

that much American Idol. I don't know much about saying the TV shows. And then Anna says she doesn't know about it either, So what are we gonna do about I've seen so many clips of it. I've probably seen the entire series, but in a series of like YouTube clips that I watch on my phone at like seven in the morning when I'm not quite ready to wake up, right, And that is and that is a great um summarine

assessment of the whole series. I think it's it's something that you would watch that ended up sort of fragmenting culture in a way. When don't you say so? We've said in the past on this show, in our very first episode that American Idol invented common culture. We do. We do think that like people being so confident in I think started like when everyone was like, look how funny it is for that to happen to all these people, and like on a mass level, I think like American

Idol did have a lot to do with that. So it's really interesting, Yeah, because you're watching people watching something exactly, You're watching people watch something and then say what they do and do not like about it, which is in no way natural. That is YouTube but must be. Yeah, and three people who probably shouldn't have ever been asked to give to give feedback to profession I mean, how did the three of them? What was the elimination process? Like I think that is I mean, we take it.

It's such a it's such a meme, the three of them, but like, you know, well, it's kind of interesting because I think they were trying to come at it from like three different perspectives, which is like a producer and executive and an artist. But what they got was like this producer who, to be honest with you, like Simon Cowell. I think he was peripherally involved with the Spice Girls, but he never really broke huge music artist. It wasn't like they had like l A Read on the show

or Clive Davis. It wasn't like he was this pioneer in creating artist. So they got kind of a B level executive in that regard who had a great personality for television. I guess Randy Jackson. I mean sure, I guess he was involved in the music industry, but he was definitely like the least exciting personality of the three of them. And Paula Abdul, Sure, you've got a musical artist, I guess, But she can she competently judge singing? No, she wasn't. She was. She was never a good vocalist,

not known for that. And like you know what, I also know a lot of really shitty comedians, but and like they the thing about them is like there are around comedy all the time. So it's like, even if Paula Abdul is not a good singer, like she's around

a lot of singers. I guess she's a lot of performance I'm playing Devil's advocate with myself, which is I think, Yeah, I mean she she definitely you could say she had an insider's point of view, and I get it, Like but then years later, you know, they did have like the singer of all singers, Mariah Carry, judged the show years later, and she, I guess, was also an awful judge, probably worse than Paul Abdul, so I guess it doesn't really matter. I feel like none of the judges after

the original three were good. But anyway, let's some let's let's should we start from the very beginnings of the show. I mean, I guess that's that's that's well. I basically just wanted to just talk about the fact that it's over and like now to do like a porch more post Porsche mortem, like a post mortem on the show

I remember, And I do agree with you. I think that it's something that everyone's at least like familiar with in some way, Like there was a time when it was inescapable, and I do think everybody legitimately watched it, I guess when we were like in fucking middle school or something, when it was just on the television. But isn't it funny that like that kind of thing, like watching people get judged get judged, became like the number one thing for Americans to do. Like that's kind of

funny to me, it's kind of interesting. I think it says a lot. We also love putting numbers on the fronts of people's bodies. Yeah, that's true, cattle. That's such an American thing. Marathon's beauty pageants, American idol. Of course. Marathon started in America, the marathon in New York City, and that was how running started. They said good, Yeah, they said, good, this is good. Let's keep doing this

every year. They said, yeah. There's actually a rule if you don't if you finish a marathon and you don't say I like this, it doesn't count your it's discoved. And most people aren't told that, so their first marathon is sort of like a test roond and then yeah, and they don't stop the clock until they said I've liked this. Yeah, So that's why people's times are so high,

that's why. And they'll never reveal the really everyone finishes the marathon in like they just forget to say they forget they like that, They say I like this, and then five hours later they're like wrapped in a tinfoil blanket drinking a beer and someone's like, what can I go a tangent on tinfoil blankets really quick? One time they wrapped me in a tinfoil blanket because I had a panic attack a track camp and they wrapped me

in a tinfoil blanket. And this is actually kind of tangential to the running thing and the tinfoil blanket because I was at track camp. I'm gonna bravely share this story. I had an anxiety attack a track camp because I got very sick one day and I was like a sophomore in high school and I was really very closeted, and I all my friends kind of bailed on the

track camp, so I went alone. And it was a week like an upstate New York and I was really kind of kind of irritated because I was going to be by myself, and I was very nervous because I didn't like really make a new friends stuff like that. Sleepaway camp really hurt really really hard. Everyone sticks are waggling around. Yeah, it's tough. And there was this one girl from like a neighboring town. I think that kind

of got a crush on me. And I actually recognized her because I had seen her across the stadium at an O A R. Concert. Oh all right, so this is to start from the beginning. I was at an O R concert with all my friends on August twelve, two thousand five, six six, and we all want to go see O R. With opening act Jack's mannequin, which is the most long island thing. I think it was August twelve. I think that's um. I think that's the

day I got fingered for the first time. Oh yeah, so so milestones and that was the day that you know that because you scrawled it in with your own nail on your and he was upset, stopped, what are you doing? Never mind? I was like, no, it's on a scandal, on scandal. That was the day that I was in China, And my my cousin said for the first time, but when you talk like a girl, So

that's that was a big day for me too. But going so anyway, I saw this girl across like we were like in the slight mezzanine and she was like in the end of the ground floor. And so my friend my friends were like, yo, those girls are like said whatever straight men say about women, those girls, and so they turned around and we were just like and

it was just like that idiosy. So like I remember, like I clocked what she looked like and then like months later, no, actually like weeks, weeks later, you clocked the look. Weeks later, I went to track camp and I clocked the face and I was like, oh my god, that's that girl from the O I R. Concert And she was she was just as surprised to see me. And it was like basically Sandy and Danny but a

hell escape. Yeah. So it was like I was like in hell absolute how because I was like I had like flirted with her across the stadium, because you can't do anything sexual across the stadium. That's perfect for gay man. I say, you, hundreds of yards away, this is the most it will ever get. I probably honestly did like the gross like pussy things. Actually, the story gets really dark. I'll keeping, god, how old are you? I was sixteen, so very very Long Island closets from Long Island too,

so sorry. Um. So, basically, like she gets to the track camp, we see each other, and I freak out and I started, I start to really panick, but we kind of start to become friends. But her friends come over to our like bunk a lot to talk to us of a different girl, know, the same girl, very girl. Oh yeah, they broke all the rules. So basically three days in was like the big track camp dance where they were going to where they were going to serve like milkshakes and it was like a social but there'd

also be a DJ kind of campuses. It was ridiculous. So basically, so you have warm I don't know, but it was. I remember it was such a big deal. We were getting milkshakes. That's that's insane. So we um, We're all like at the camp and we're at the camp dance and like they I'm in my bunk because I'm not leaving the bunk. I'm like, I'm sick, and they were like, no, you have to come out, and I had been making up that I was sick. So

I got. I got to the dance and I like danced with her or whatever, and we like grinding and the whole thing to the point where I was able to grind with her but like and it was like non sexual enough where I could like convince everyone I was enjoying it. And one of the camp counselors came over and shine a flashlight on us, which means you had to back up. So I was like, I guess we have to stop, and I went back to my bunk,

and it was like convinced them. So basically the next day, I wake up in like with like a hundred three fever, horrible, horrible, like my like in stitches, like from from something. So I go to the infirmary which they had set up, and then nurse practitioner was there like all right, let's do this, this, this, and she took my temperature and I'm miraculously somehow didn't have a fever. But I felt horrible.

So I went back to my bunk. Was miserable, back and forth and back and forth because I can't run, so I'm just like literally doubled over in pain. I go to the nurse practitioner like a fourth time, and she says to me, she looks at me in the eyes, and she goes, is this the first time you've been away from home? And literally the second she said that, I hit the ground and I had full body convulsion and I lost complete control of my body. I had to rip all my clothes off on the spot. I

started sweating through my skin. I started shaking uncontrollably and proceeded to not stop shaking for an hour and a half and they had to wrap me a metal sheet and I was like in front of all these kids that were just having like um, you know, like they were like cramping up or something, and I'm literally and let somebody who would like to be And so I'm literally there like having a complete what I think is mental breakdown, asking the woman if I am going to

die because because I really didn't know what was going on, I didn't know and the worst thing they could have done they did to me, which was as it was happening, they looked at me dead in the eyes and held my shoulders back and went, you're having on an attack and I was like, oh my god. And They're like and then basically once I finally stopped freaking out, they were like, yeah, basically we think that you're sick because you're very anxious about being away from home in your

mind is creating all this stuff. And I was like, well, all I know is one thing, which is called my parents, like I'm getting because they had repeatedly up until that point said no, no, no, because they didn't want me to ask for my money back, I was like, I'm not going to ask my money back. I just want to go home. So they came and get me and they took me home. The leader of the track camp, who was like this track sense a goes to me before I left, what are you going to do in college?

How will you last? I can't make it. One week, I was like, I'm sick. And my parents had such a fight in the car home because I guess my mom was like upset that my dad had and said something. But I think we're all in just such shock that he was doing this. So, oh my god, this ended up being such a longer thing. But I have to tell this last part of the story because I think it's insane. So the girl is crying as I'm leaving, like it's like it's like, oh my god, It's it's

as if the breakup. It's as if, you know, she was like discovering like super power. It's as if like we had been all summer and this was like me being taken away. It was like when you're a kid and you move away to a new town. It's the way your best friend. She's crying, crying, So I gave her my phone numb at some point because we had just all gone cell phones. So I got back till it got to Long Island. Then a few weeks go

by and she's texting me a lot. So at the time, I had this friend Ryan, who was like a year older than me. He had a car, so we were like and he was really interested like going on on dates with girls at the time. Sound was like, this girl really wants to hang out, maybe we should go do it. So we went to go hang out and we went to the ground Round. What's that good? It's like a Friday's restaurant. I'm sure it was the Gun. It was like the one in when Yeah, near the mall,

ye Nell. So basically like we went to ground Round. We drove around for a little bit. We dropped them off, and Ryan says to me after, uh, honestly, I did not like hanging out with them, and I was like why and he was like nothing happened, and I was like okay. And then I think he also had a problem with the fact that I think she was like mixed. I think she was like a mixed race, like black white. And of course this is Long Island, so everyone's a

fucking idiot, just like an open races. So like basically like it was she black. I don't even know, and I was like, oh my god, and like the voice inside me that would become like who I am now was like, what the funk is this? What? Get like, get out of this stupid fucking town. But me, I was like, oh, yeah, I don't know, maybe it was weird whatever. And then two days later, it was still the weekend because we had like a long weekend, they texted again and said, do you guys want to hang

out with us? And Ryan literally said to me, oh. He literally said to me, tell them that I'll hang out with him if they stuck our dicks. And I was like, I am not going to tell her that, and he was like, honest, I don't know why you won't say it. They probably will be down to do it. So sixteen year old me, so brainwashed by Long Island,

ended up doing that. I was like, we'll hang out with you if you suck our dicks and they didn't respond for a while, and then they finally did respond and the only thing they said was when, And I was like, and I literally when they said that, because it was so sad. I could just feel how sad it was. I was like, I'm so sorry. Ryan took my phone and sent that like that is that was just a joke. That's not the way it is blah

blah blah blah blah. And I felt so shitty that I said him that text and I was like goodbye. So um and then I remember, uh, like weeks later, they were texting me again to hang out, and I was like, these girls have no idea like what it means to be like they were. We just like, here's the thing. If you send your daughters to the ground round, they're gonna come out a bunch of painted harlots who are hungry for media grade steaks and sixteen year old

old Absolutely, but can you believe that? No? I mean, yeah, I'm from Long Island. Yeah, Like all of my friends sort of dated the same guy with like really dark roots and like orange tips and who was like just always greasy and had like bars in all of his um parts of his face. Uh, and he just sort of sucked all of them or like they blowed. I don't know if they but they blow. I don't want a lot of straight dudes. Did you ever experienced this phenomenon?

Like probably later on in high school, a lot of the guys were getting thigh tattoos, know what the fuck? I got a lot of bicep tats. There was a guy in all of my classes who had a sublime tat that took up his whole bicep. There was a guy bicep tattoos makes sense, But thigh tattoos, like inner thighs, like tattoos on their thighs. I've heard of guys getting tattoos like on a ring around their thighs, which must

be an entrance into being gay, I think, yeah. And then I also knew a guy that got the word beer tattooed on his upper phone. That is the most trashy I think. I mean, yeah, it was six but like, yeah, I mean those that like those stories of tattoos don't

surprise me about Long Island. But that story that, that long story you just told us just is riddled with like every it's discussed, it's riddled with no, it's not no, it's not even that's everything that's wrong and oppressive about it's just yeah, society, teenage angst at that specific time. It's and like that story has every example of every form of that which I think is linked back to American idol. I will also I went to summer camp also on Long Island, and we American idol is huge.

When I was there and I was in love with the British councilor named Ben who was later an extra and Sweeney Todd, and I was pretty sure he was like maybe a pedophile, like we could probably work it out, like really in love, like crazy in love with him,

and uh I was. I wrote a sketch called Counselor Idol that we're going to do a council fire at the end of the week and I was to play bad and uh, I stole his shirt, like me and my counts are like hatched a plan to steal his shirt because he was playing shirts of the Skins soccer. I'm just like leaving a slime trail behind me, like so excited. And I wore it and it was great and then afterwards he said keep it. I just said no, no,

not at all. He's very sweet, um, not a petal, which was like a bummer at the time, but I guess now I'm like cool. Um. But my counselor who helped me steal it, was like, I don't think it's appropriate. I think you should give it back. And I found a hair in the shirt and it's still in a plastic um um container in my house. Wow, that's very good work. So American idol is a part of teenage

genitals everywhere. But I do I do think it's along the same path of like you, why do you do inside these things because you're told that that's what's fine to do. So like with common culture, and like the way we all tear each other down, like and like with the way we talked about each other, like it's only because like on a on a big macro scale, we're shown that it's fine as long as the people do actually suck you should you can you're able to

say they're bad, which sucks. I guess Wow, that's I mean. Remember um, like William Hung. We were just talking about William off the record before you came here. We were just talking about how it was like like I've dressed up as William Hung, like my sophomore year homecoming like celebrity. Like there's a celebrity day where people just dressed well you want homecoming king, didn't you That was the same year when homeoming you give a little no no, no no,

no um, that was not the year no um. But they remember that the next year when it came to about two years later, I did. I did win homecoming. I had one homecoming lord, which is the fresh in royalty homecoming Lord. Our entire core was I was as freshmen were Lord and lady. Sophomores were duke and duchess. Then juniors were printed princess kin. They were both just I did win prom king in my high school, and I wanted it so bad. Both of you. I hate I what is this? I hated because I thought, no

longer relate to either of you. Well know, can you relate to this? Because I thought I was convinced that my homecoming king win was a total joke. It was like, oh, like this is I was a joke candidate, and like people just like even still even even still in like sixty sure it was a joke. I don't think so. And I think that they voted for you. Then again, I don't know what your high school experience was like. But you don't want to guess there. I mean you

were there. Everyone's both of you. I want I want to guess at you gaslight And I said, I want to guess at you. People have been using the term gaslight you an Ton, Yeah, because it's it's it's been twenty four year old man named Brian just learned what it means. It's rule rule number. We haven't we haven't named any rules yet this episode Rule number sixty seven Gas Culture. Yeah. Um, I just wanted to tag onto, uh the idea of like it being sad that we

criticize people. I think a part of that is you got to look at it from the other side too, because like I think it's not just about criticizing, but like our this like new emerging need that we have in our generation, especially to be evaluated and to be constantly like sized up and told whether or not we're doing well. And like we'd rather hear that we're not doing well than like I don't know if that's true, but like I think like we need to be monitored

and viewed and like seen individually. Uh So I think it's Yeah, it's like definitely the like John ronson side of it of like shaming people that yeah, yeah, I mean it ignores a lot of like issues of racism and stuff. Um, but yeah, it's still like that concept is really interesting. So it's not just that, it's like also that we need to be seen. Yeah, I think that came out came about too, and I think that's

so interesting what you said, and I totally agree. And I think it also came about like as we were able to get more things, like like when you were able to just get whatever music you want, like the fact that we can just play any song we want to listen to right now, like like you can get anything like tangible. So then it becomes like, well, what are the intangible things that we can't get? I want those now I have everything else, So it becomes this

thing of like what do you think about me? Like everyone's just very self centered and so this is like a very kind of heavy thing. But like I agree that it's just moving forward from like all these tangible things that were satisfied on now because we're so kind of saturated with all of it now we're like, what else can I get that I need? I need affirmation,

I need love, I need respect, I need this. So I need to get it from you at whatever means necessarily doesn't mean it doesn't matter if I'm humiliated in the process. Exactly. We'll hang out with you if you suck our dicks. That's what it is. So sad. Wow, that's really tranject. I bet you guys had great dicks, though I've always had a large dick. I can't speak.

I know, I know, I do. You know. Look, there's this need in society to like, um, always like talk about your dick size and have that be evaluated and judged and commented on. And I think it needs to stop. Well how far away with me? How far away from like America's biggest dick? Are we? Not very far? I think like who has it? Does Guinness track that? I mean, I feel like Guinness has to be pretty pretty because

because their whole market is like allergic to outside. I used to get the Guinness Book of World Records every same. I got that for my brother this year. I hate me liked it and it was thirty It is expensive, it's big to it. I have hated the Guinness Booker World Records ever since they showed the man with the longest fingernails and oh my god, that was a classic, no fucking way this book suck. Those finger nails were insane. That was a rude thing they did to us. It

was very rares. So guys just talking, we've not talked about American idol a little bit, and we're talking about a little bit. This is we've talked about America for sure, we sure have when I think, but I think we've talked about American idols much as we possibly can. We haven't even said the words like carry underwood, but like who needs it? So we get what it is. So like some people are sure have surely gone on to success. Most people haven't. Like it pretty much sucks, but it

is the end of a big era. Now I ask you, guys, what era do you wish would end next? What is going on right now in the landscape, in the culture that you're like, fuck skateboards. I almost got hit by a guy just before who was on a skateboard going the wrong way down a one way street when I had the light and he almost hit she. And he was like a male blond, which I take issue with, and he like fell off his board. He looked back

and then like stumbled off his board. I was like, you're not a victim here, You're not also a victim after the facts right right? And I went, how long have skateboards been? A too long? Too long? Too long? Six the sixties it was surfer culture, yeah, those little short plastic ones. That was like apparently what they were like back then. I don't try to cover board culture now. I thought he was on a hoverboard at first. I

was so confused. I don't know, there's always going to be a sucking board for people to be get off aboard. My little cousin who's like gonna grow marijuana basic, he's just waiting for legalized. He's like in the school for not bought any whatever. It's called agriculture. Um. And he when he was like fifteen, I was like, do you know what you want to do? And he said, um, like for a job like after school. He said, I said what do you want to go to school for?

And he said like longboarding. I was like, that is barely a form of transportation, much less a career. Could any of you ever do it? Though? Because my other cousin had a skateboard and it didn't work out for me, that that was like a big like huge, that was a huge thing that made me feel insecure about being a boy. Oh, I have to tell you one time, every year my cousin would have like these skateboard birthday parties.

And my cousin had had they had a lot of money and they were able to make a half pipe. My cousin owned a half pipe. What and such A giggled into his fists. It's a giggle just started building in a half pipe. Just can't see this, But let me tell you, I never felt worse or more or less included than like at those birthday parties where it was like, oh of us, I can do this, like like fringe athletic thing like everyone else. Wait, I'm so

sorry to I want to hear. But um, this guy in my first grade class, Matt Barnathon, who we all wanted to kiss. Uh um. He I was forced by his mom in first grade to invite his whole class to his laser tag birthday party. And he was so mad about it. And he told us that and he put all the kids he didn't like, which is mostly girls, on one team, and then all of his friends on the other, and they just like shot us for an hour. And you guys were like, oh, I was like Mezza,

I was like, I love that the team. It was what do you think? But I don't know. You could have been like a cool timboy girl? Are you fucking kidding me? What were you like? In elementary school, quiet smart, um, weird, I like to giggle, makes sense. Hot a ship was like get out of get out, you get out. I'm not old than I'm Yeah, I don't get what you

like an elementary school boing. But here's the thing before I answer that, I don't think I don't understand the concept of their being hot kids, Like we'll look like I I moved to the US as a fourth grader and then like there was just this thing that wasn't that didn't exist in Canada or maybe even in the third grade, where it was like, oh, like things are starting to stratify a bit, like these are the cool

kids and these are like the lame ones. But I was like, but wait, aren't we all like all of us like are fucking idiots? Like there's no like there's like what are the markers of status? You probably knew that because you're very smart, and like, I think it's that hive mind thing that happens, which is the second year old enough to be sexually aware. You can look around and see what's desirable and what's not assirable in the moment, and you do make calls and hierarchical decisions

getting made based on that ship. I just want to say that I went into the fourth grade like hot, hot as fun but I like, I went into fourth the fourth grade being like, Okay, I'm just gonna be really smart and try to be funny because you have to choose the qualities that you're going to have. It's so dumb, and so I would like fucking. There was

this girl, Laura Henderson, who she sounds really complex. She was she was no, she was Australian, pasty, fucking Australian girl who was like the not hot, well she was pretty, but she was like the overachieving girl in class, and like you could tell that everyone in the class was like a little intimidated by her, and they were like, we need someone to like strike her down. And so I came in and I was the first person to beat her at spelling be Oh my god. That was

such a thing too. That was such a watershed moment in the in the politics of that class where it was like, oh my god, someone's someone's defeated. Lord st No for me, no, for like that was like that

was like a power thing for me. They were like wow, Bowen, Oh, oh, Bowen is good because he's and that was moved from a different school from Canada, from a different country, and so I had a similar experience when I moved schools because I think maybe some schools just do things at a different rate, like in terms of what you learn, or because I moved to a new school and then all of a sudden, I was the smartest kid in class and they were like, you're the smartest person. And

it was just so weird. And it was based on the spelling, because the spelling that's like the big like that's the big like singer swim moment. Yeah. I just think it's like when a new kind of intelligence or a new kind of aesthetic comes in, like everyone's gonna be like, oh, what's this? Because I remember when I was in third grade of fourth grade, I had we had a new kid moved into the class, and he

was like a totally average looking kid. But then all the girls, I think because they were like their their sexual button it just gotten pushed. They were like, oh I want to fuck justin like that's what they were all saying. Was like, and I was like, those kids dumb, those kids are here, the kids, these kids are dump started dump. But he was and I was like really upset because again I had chosen my two qualities and

they were like cute and smart. That's so funny. And then the hot, the hot fourth Greers ended up growing up into being horrible. Well, no, they grew up into also being hot high schoolers. I was like, oh, then I guess you can back then I can tell, but everyone else could and I was like, wait, what do you guys thinking that I'm not Anyway, Well, it's funny because from elementary school to high school, yeah, the hot kids stayed hot, but then after high school, by god,

did they take a dive. Yeah, but there's always the ones who don't, and then that's a bummer. Or they do, and then they get married and their wives take their names, which like, if I were guy, I would like come buckets. If she did that, that's like incredible. And then they like buy a house and the house looks incredible, and they have a baby girl and then they just put the giantest flower headband on her head and it's bigger

than her body. And then like they have a dog named Bent lean's like a cockapoo, and you're like, fuck, they're still winning. They're still winning, Like okay, fine, you stop playing football, you started baulding, you put on weight, you still have a wife who has your literal name.

That's incredible. I know. It's just different the way we look at things too, in the way like that they like people that remained with traditional lives look at things like and then sometimes I think to myself, like, maybe we're the funked up ones because we want all these complicated things and want to have all these complicated ideas about like what to do and what they're not doing. Then I'm like, no, everyone's oppressed, never mind, Yeah, but are just are those are those like are the people

who are still winning? Like I don't know if they're even oppressed anymore. They I feel like they've been in Laighten because that's not a part of what they're thinking about. Like you're you're never gonna know that you're oppressed if

you don't know what that means. Like that's like why women in the fifties and sixties didn't work because they didn't know they could, like and if they once they found out, it was like almost too late because it was too late to compete with everyone who had educations in those things and stuff like that. That's what the whole funked up like wound in society is is the fact that like, we lied to everyone about the American Dream.

I sound like so insane, but this is true. I think, um, we lied to everyone about the American Dream and everyone bought it and it wasn't fair. Two people bought it lock Stock and Barrel. But the thing is, like, I don't know. I went to a wedding with a friend of mine as a favor because she didn't know anyone. But it was a close friend and it was on Long Island. Yea, thank you, um. And it was literally everyone that I wouldn't have um ever talked to in

high school. Not my actual high school. It was all of the friends from when they worked at path Mark as teenagers. And they got ship faced and we're like grinding on me on the dance floor and I was like oh no no, no, absolutely not no, no no no, and this guy like shoved me into the dance floor. I was like, oh no, no no. And then we had to take the shuttle back with everyone and they were like, oh, table four shut the I was like, oh my god, we're on a bush and yeah, and

table six. This guy said like, oh see, Apaul did he went up to the barto at the end of the night he was rereleaving, and he said, hey, how much And then they all laughed and I was like, oh, you all have wives who took your last names, and you're happier than me. Because the thing is, like in high school, I would have said, like, you know what, I'm going to be so much better than you, like

you're just gonna be unhappy after graduation. But the thing is, like I had a panic attack next to a bird wing last night, and like like listening to the comedy Bang Bang like theme song, um, so it's like, you know, and he's got azalea bushes that look fucking right, so like, yeah, you know those you know, those homes are prisons. No, they're not. What if they're happier, They are happier. Have

you seen American beery? Yeah, there are roses. Well, I will say I was actually pretty grateful in high school because I did have like a nice group of friends that that knew that everything was bullshit, so that was kind of nice. And I think that they've like we've all really kind of remained like sort of sort of cool.

But the thing is like I wonder like if I had really fallen into a like a group of people in high school that took themselves very seriously, if like it really happens that early, like if people just like if people make decisions, big decisions as early as high school. I think they did, because I feel like I'm behind. I feel like I slowly forgot to become an adult.

And like, I guess part of it is I'm like working at like a more like a company now, like a corporate that like they are functional, but you'll pick that up very quick. But it's like I just feel like I'm such an unwashed, like street brat, and I like have no idea. No, I'm not worried about you. You know, it's interesting that we're like talking about our upbringing a lot because I think it is very connected to American Idol because it was like it started when

we were pretty young at a very critical point. It's like a it's like a shelter dog that lives eighteen years. Well, I have to say I would try. I would tune in occasionally to it this season, like really occasionally while I was on the road with the show, I was I was doing I watched the episode that was um they had. Kelly Clarkson returned to the show as a judge, of course, and she performed at the end of the show.

She performed this like super emotional song that she wrote about being abandoned by her father and how she didn't trust men until she was much older and now she's married to a man that respects her and they have

children together and she knows that. So it's actually beautifully, really powerfully performed song that happened on American Idol, And I found myself watching it like and I was like, I just rose off my chair because I was like, Wow, this show actually did create something for me, which was like I did. Look, I did really idolize her at

that when she when she won that show. Remember being in sixth grade and like like maybe going into seventh grade and then feeling really stressed because I just realized I was gay like a couple of years ago. And what I liked about her, which is totally something I bought, I understand, but I still like, I think it's um valuable is that she was very herself. Is that she had like a weird sense of humor and she was like down to earth and very talented, and everyone fell

in love with her. And so I said to myself in my in my mind, like wow, like if you be yourself, maybe people will like you. And then I would, And then that actually was a positive thing that I carried with me. Wait, you know when you just said that, you know what I just realized I used. The way I used American idol was after season two when Clay and Alma was runner up and he came out with

his album Measure of a Man. My sister and I would listen to it in the car and I would use American idol as the way to mask my, uh like my closeted status. I was like, oh, well, this is a popular thing that I can latch onto and people don't have to get that suspicious because it's like popular. Everyone likes it, like it's it's definitely get it's so gay, but like at least you can hide behind the mask of it being this thing that everyone can be on

board with. And so I was like, great, this is like something I can I can take cover behind for like at least a year. It was really like cla and know well, it was the birth of metro sexual. It was because we had to justify what the funk Ryan Seacrest was. I was like, forget that he's involved with that show. Oh he has been since. Oh no, I like forget that that's why he came out of the sea. Yeah. Right. Literally, them trying to like masculinize men that seemed like pretty gay or gay at all,

was like, well, they're metro sexual. It just means that they're concerned with their appearance and habits. But they're straight. They love women, like, please don't believe that. They remember how they remember how during clayag and season they tried to like spin some bullshit narrative about him and kimberly Lock know him and Karmen was her name, and she was like this like really kind of an average like singer. But they did they try to push the romance between

kimberly Lock and someone else. Yeah, they did. They constantly tried to be like, oh, there's something going on with Clay and a woman, and you were just like watching it and there's no way. What's crazy is how many American alcateestents have come out since the show. It's like don like in the first season, like there was five men in the top five, and four of them were gay. Everyone but Justin Guarini with the with the first is

not gay. He's not gay. He's got just Sanjaia sa gay. Well, he wasn't the one I was thinking about, like Clay has been coming out as gay. I mean it's were killed that senator. That's true. That is a funny story. I love the claic. We live in a world now, like it's been long enough. The claic and came to us that he like was denying murder allogations during a

political campaign, right right right, like there's nothing rash turned out. Okay, it'll be Clayake and writing for senator denying murder allegations, and you live in a shock. I love it. Oh man, that is so funny. But he definitely didn't get a seat in Congress right now, that didn't. I think it was they were in the same party, but I don't know that because one of them is an incumbent. I think I don't know. I might have been happy. I remember, I think it was post the election. The person that

won it was. It was the like it was like the seat elect I don't remember. I thought it was before. I thought it was before the election. That's why that could couldn't be true. I know that he did not rightfully win a seat, but also, um, weird that even and I think it was like two thousand eight, like when Adam Lambert was on the show, they weren't saying he couldn't have been more gay? What a weird? It was so recent that the whole country was like what gay?

Like our are you fucking kidding me? And now like Neil Patrick Harrison is gorgeous. Family are like posing as the Joker and Robin and Batman like in People magazine and no one that's a fucking eye. Last yea, that is funny because so rapidly and that actually gets me like hot and bothered. I said this on Facebook once, but like when when people post that that clip of Hillary Clinton saying I don't believe in gay marriage, Yeah, fucking everyone else was saying that too until three minutes ago,

so shut up. Yeah yeah, yeah, that's what. I just don't like it, like we like we pretend like we've always been cool with gay people, and like that stuff that we said didn't matter. I remember like sitting on the couch with my mom in high school, like my mom and my sister would be in the room and we turn on Gray's Anatomy, and like Kellie and Arizona would kiss and they would freak out like we were watching the Twin Towers come down. I was like, and

they would not We needed to turn the channel. I was like, this is crazy, and I was like, don't melt steal games. They can't if they don't burn hot enough. But almost you guys have a conspiracy theory. We're gradsing out of me lesbian truth Melton my steel beam if you know it. Oh, I just couldn't. I wish it were an inside job. Sorry, nice, I couldn't believe. Like it's been about a month and a half. Okay, that's

that's good. Storre than Wait, what do you mean since sex? Yeah, I made out with that's when did you make out? You can do? I know him? You told me already. Yeah, sat on Sunday, Okay, because I love when people make up people that I know. I love making up people. Forget about making this love making. You can just make out with someone. It's great. Ess. Actually one of my one of my favorite things to do. This is a funny story. Well we'll talk about this later. It's a

really funny story. Well, oh yeah, it's like I'm like the most mentally fragile I've ever been, and like with the thought of like having a podcast come back to bite me in the ass is just not something I need to be married that happens to me. Um. So, guys, speaking of being married, let's talk about someone who's been married several times and it's involved with American idol um Jennifer Lopez. Jennifer Lopez. So wait, by the way, what did we decide on that we want? Oh, skateboarding, we

want that area. And for me, I want wedding like the current wedding culture now, oh yes, I don't have to talk about that. It's weird. Just have a party. No, I agree with you that the whole the whole era of like we're having a wedding, it needs to end. I literally just want the city the city Hall thing for new It's after all this fucking nonsense oft of modernity in wedding culture, Like, it's just no, it makes no sense. Yeah, I agree with both of you. Guys.

What air, what air needs to go for you know what air needs to go for me? I'm going to say, you know, what. I'm gonna keep thinking about it, um, because I just don't know, right um. But I do know about this next topic. This next topic is we talked about American idol. Let's talk about the queen of it right now, Jennifer Lopez. Jennifer, what's your favorite Jennifer Lopez Era? All right, I'll start And this is a

very unconventionally answer. Okay, go ahead. Her last album promotion cycle, when she was promoting what was it called The on the Floor? Is it called love question mark? No? No, no, it's the K That's what it was. Only we know the titles of her albums US and Her, US and Her, And she came up with a song called I Love You, I Love your Poppy, I love You. But the song is really good and the video is really cute and funny.

I like the video to videos, like really. It's like she's with her friends and they're talking to this like music video producer. They're writing a dreaming for the music video, and they're like, what if j Lo like like falls and hits her head and like has a dream about a boy like and her and all our friends are like, excuse me, we can't do that they're like, I don't think so she needs to be fierce. It's really good.

It's really good. And then the video so you like like j Lo dripping swag ou well, she because she didn't give a fuck. She was like, you know what, like, I'm never gonna be like seen as like a Beyonce anymore. Like I think for a while she was trying to be like before Beyonce became Beyonce, she was trying to be that figure, like that untouchable like I mean, she's

physically flawless, but like that physical like pillar of perfection. Like, but then like I think that the last album cycle, she was just like, you know what, I'm just gonna have fun. I will say that my favorite j Lo is romantic comedy j Love. Just watch Made in Manhattan. What holds Up? No, it does not. It's the most bat shit crazy thing I've ever seen. It. Definitely crazy.

But isn't she charming. She takes a woman's clothes and wears them, and her son's like, go go go get fucked moms, and he's like, mom, you have to go get fused. And then all of her friends are just there and they're like, you gotta get fused and then he comes in and they're all like he's white, and then everyone's like your hispanic and then they like go for a walk and she's just wearing someone else's clothes and it's like his wife or something he's wearing. It's insane.

It is the most it feels like it, you know, like art created by serial killers. Like it felt like, oh, this is creative by a death throw in me. That is like fried meat loaf. That is not my favorite one. Can I tell you what my favorite one is? My favorite Dre Little roum Come is Wedding Planner because it has this moment at the end. Okay, wedding Planter is with it's with her and Matthew McConaughey and Matthew McConaughey is getting married and she's the wedding planner and during

the preparations for the wedding they fall in love. So basically like there's nightmare, what a night There's nothing worse than this. Did she give them their deposit back? I mean, so well, let me get there. So basically, like I guess to the point later on where oh this is so funny, this is a great look. Communicant gym. So they're in the car riding back from seeing the venue and and the white the wife was like so thin and so blonde, like so severe, and I think she

definitely is like Pete Sampras's wife and that actress. She's like that. She's like a sweetheart. Um, we don't have a song, and we need to pick a song right now, So I'm gonna flick through the wedding song CD and you tell You're like and earlier in the movie, um J Loo is having a talk with her like friends about how she can tell how long a marriage is gonna last, and she goes, I always know a marriage

is doom. When they picked the wedding song and they choose I Honestly Love You by Olivia Newton John and they're flicking, flicking through and and the woman goes like, no, not this song, not this song, not the song, And then I Honestly Love You by Olivia Newton John comes on and she goes, Olivia Newton John, I love this song. And Matthew McConnelly is like, I like it too, and Jennifer Lopez is like, I think it's perfect. And that's

how you know that she's gonna win. But then there's a crushing moment where it looks like it's not going to work out, and j Lo is like packing up her ship to leave the venue and this song is playing, and this is the words of the song, how can I plan on forever when I plan on you? So it's like works because she's a wedding plan, plan, plan plan, I plan to plan in wedding. Well, it's the worst and it's the best. And then do you ever see

a monster in law? No? Well, in the end after yeah, Jane Fonda in her And at the end when j Loo gives a speech that says like she gives her final speech to Jane Fonda and want to sex. One of the Sikes goes man, that girl can give a good little speech, Oh my god, poor one wander s give a little speech, oh my god. And then Wanda will come in and compliment the person, and then that's a wrap on Wanda. Honestly, it was like that. She plays like Jane Pond is best friend, which like sure,

no never, but also she is like her employee. People who wear leotards are always racist, j Lo era your favorite Anna dressin it's a good question. I love Selena. I mean, I love truly good word. I love her natural nose. I thought it was really cute. I like knowing that she's like a girl from the block, you know, Like I like knowing that she's like the pretty girl in high school who's like famous, and now she just looks like she you know, came out of the c

phone again. Um, but I like I like that. Um My, grandma, we watched the was it the v m as when she wore the dress or the MTV? I think it was the Grammys, the Grammys for first acci Dress. Yeah. Um My grandma lost her mind because Ellen Dejenneres was doing the Red carpet interviews and she was gay and she kept yelling you're gay, you're gay, and you're gay and disgusting and you're gay. And then Jennifer Lopez came

out and she kept saying, pig, you're a pig. And then Ellen interviewed j Lo and she was like, pig gay, gay, pig gay. Um. I say that's my favorite because I love David Dukovany and I love when he's like, I'm horny cool. Did I would tell you, Oh my god, this is so funny. I was at dojo, which is

like now right now, are from where we are right now. Um, when it was old dojo and we were there and I was like waiting around with my friend Lauren from my school, and we were watching like David Dukovany sat there with his kids, and he was so upset. And then tayley On he walks in and they said no words to each other, and like he left and they did like a child handoff, and I said later to my expense, um, and yeah, David Dukovany looked miserable the

whole time. Mike goes, well, that's because he probably wanted to fund his food all night. Is such an insane sex attict, right, he's such a I do think he's hot. I would make sure you watch Californication. There's some good like uh uh, you know, celebrity skin type websites that will give you just what you need to see. Yeah, I'll get you know what. I'm gonna buy some rubber sheets, a couple of tarps, playing on the tarps, so I'm just gonna let it get She gushes. Goosh um cool, Jennifer.

I feel like she's so incredibly beautiful right now, like her hair and her makeup her and boy next door was like, oh you in theaters? Yeah? Um, but yeah. She just looks incredible in every scene, which is distracting because she's supposed to be like I'm going through a divorce. She's like, Oh, I'm like a homely wife. I'm just like a teacher wife. I'm just like a teacher wife. I just I'm I'm sorry, I can't talk right now,

Like I'm a teacher wife. I'm busy, I'm a teach your wife, I have to do these papers and this wife and he got me a copy of The Odyssey first editions and also and also her acting in that scene was just so Her in acting in general is curious because she like just sort of doesn't open and her job at all just like whoa Like, I don't like there's her acting technique is small mouth? Do you know?

What I can't believe is like this whole time we're talking about her, and she's literally on that NBC show Shades of Blue or whatever it's called, and like it's a thing, and my thing is like, how did she work it out that she could do a Fox show at an NBC show at the same time, Because she's Jifer. I think yeah rights incredible lawyers. She also I saw her say on each Your Hollywood story that she loves love um, which confused me even though I was I just love to buy that this snake is starting to

eat its own talent. She loves love guys. With that being said, I want to at this time, I want to present our Lifetime Achievement Awards to Jennifer Lopez. Bowen, you have the floor. Please present your Lifetime Achievement Awards to Jolo, who's truly deserved that at this point. Visionary artist, innovator, body, image disruptor. These are just some some of the words that I have used to describe the recipient of the Lost Culture Asta's Lifetime Achievement Award to myself in the

silence of my own room. Jennifer Lopez is such an inspiration to me and two millions across the world, and I hope she comes to my next birthday party at an outdoor bar. Thank you, Anna present your Lifetime Achievement Awards, Jennifer Lopez. When a human being is born, they exit a female body. Sometimes they themselves are female bodies, sometimes they're not. The answer, of course, is left up to the toy costs of chance Jennifer Lopez as a woman, but more than that, she came from a woman, as

did we all. I was just that's it. That's it, Matt, your turn, Jennifer, girl. What a road, what a path, what a day? I stand before you humbly, as your friend, as your collaborator, as your ex husband. My name is Chris Judd. I want to thank you for putting me on the map, for putting so many of us on the map. You putting Mark Anthony on the map. No miamis to my son. No miamis cuss And yeah, that's what I have to say. I feel like she'd be so judgments all she heard this at all, I think

she would crack her ass up. I don't. I don't think she would. I think she think it's funny. You do, Yeah, I do. I think I think that she had a good sense of humor. Her makeup would not have been as good in The Boy next stor because it looks incredible in every scene. You don't think she has a good sense of humor For doing the War next Door?

Absolutely not, No, because that could have been an amazing piece of camp and instead they made they tried to make it like fucking what lies beneath that's not her? That might not have been her problem. She was an ep on it. It's her vehicle. There's no way someone wrote that movie not for Jennifer Lopez. No one was like, I want to write this movie. I don't care who's

in it. So now comes, Um, we have a couple things that we have to do before we wrap, and this first segment is called I don't Think so honey, which is you have sixty seconds on the clock to rail against something using the words I don't think so honey, and you can get as upset as you want. You have sixty seconds, and it's anything in culture, anything in your life, as long as you present a case and you complete the case. Man, I think I think either one of us should start first, and I can see

I think that should go first. All right, I don't. I don't haven't thought of one, okay, but let's let's do one. Well. That's part of part of what makes this amazing is it's off the cuff great because we find out what's truly bothering you love it. I don't Think so honey. With Boonen Yang starting right now, you know what, I don't think so, honey, strep throat I've been having. I've been in I've been mid bat with strep throughat for the last four days. And it is

a mobilized me. It is paralyzed my mind. I haven't been able to function at all in the workplace with my collaborators, with um, with my projects. And it's really just ground everything to a screeching hall. I don't think so, honey, strap through. You know what this is. This is not a modern day sickness anymore. It is an old perennial bacterial infection that you know at this talk about what it is should be cured, honey, and and listen, and you know what I've I've I've dealt with this strap

through it. But now I'm out of that whole fever body eg zone and I'm into this canker store at the back of my throat jone. And it is it is really still just lingering with me, and honey, it is. It is truly a crippling, crippling condition that I I think we just get angry ten seconds. I don't even think that we it has a place in society anymore or in culture honey. So at this point, I want to I want to get back on my feet. No throw culture is honey, yes, and I need a throw

culture now. So I'm wanna get back on my might be without straps is. I don't think so. I don't think so, honey. Oh my word, that was hard, because you know what's still hard for me to talk. Yeah. Sometimes the things that we don't think so, honey are the things that are keeping us back from talking. That's true. And I've known this for a while. Okay, mat you're not right. I don't think so, honey, And then time starts. Now I don't think so honey. People they don't want

to get tickled. If I feel like I want to tickle you, it's because I like you and because I love you even and if I want to come over to you and have you get a little bit of affection because I want to tickle you, it doesn't mean you have to get so touchy about it, no pun intended. I don't think so, honey. Especially my boyfriend. If I want to tickle him all over and he doesn't like being typical, he sends to it. That's fine, I want

to do it. And you know what, all my friends, if I want to tickle them, I don't think they should have a problem with it. I think that that's my way of showing affection, and you stifle me. I don't think so, honey. So when I come up to you with my fingers, first of all, don't still I'm gonna tickle you. Maybe I don't even like you that much.

But if I do start tickle you, you take it for the ten fifteen seconds it's gonna be until I'm done, and you let me tickle you the way you you need it, because sometimes you needed to laugh and you needed some joy. And I see that, and I read that when I go in the room. So, bitch, if I'm gonna tickle you, I don't think so, honey. You say now, I think you said, yes, tank, let me take let me said to me. That's a minute. Wow. This might be the first time I disagree with you.

I don't think so, honey. Yeah, I don't think so. How do you I think that no one. I think that that's an invasionive person, literally, an indefensible position to take. I think that you guys are there's nothing more heinous than what you just said. It's just tickling. All right, okay, well, and I want you want to you want to go into one? Start the clock? Okay, and you start? We do. I'm sorry, Do I have permission to speak in sort of a gay accent? I didn't. I wanted to say

something that wasn't gay, but I couldn't know. Okay, say it, Okay, ready, time starts now. I don't think so honey being upright fuck that. No, no, no, I have a bed. You can I work in my bed, I sleep in my bed, I think in my bed. I look at my phone in my bed. And you know what, even when I'm not in my bed, I can be on my couch. Okay, I can be on my couch and I can lie down. When I'm upright. That means that my head has to balance on the rest of my fucking body. Are you

kidding me? What am I jenga? No? No, no, no, I am not a tower. Humans were once crawling when we were babies and when we're monkeys, and when we were sea slugs because we were sea slugs. And I'm not having this argument right now inside of I don't think so honey, interior. I don't think so honey. People who said, we're not sea slugs because we are back to the regular. I don't think so, honey, being upright. I don't want to stand. I don't want to sit. I don't want to kneel. I don't want to lean.

I don't wanna tippy toe. I don't want to jump. I want to lie down. I want to lean. I want to be on the ground. And when I visit my parents, they have carpet because they're old, and I can lie on the carpet and it's like a big bed for my whole house. And fuck being upright, I don't think so honey. I don't think so honey. I don't want to agree. I want to be lying. I like being on my belly, on my background. You know, I'm a belly girl. Everyone looks at me, said, she's

a belly girl. Belly girl. Can I tell you, I think I'm gonna throw my back at last night like partaking in some like semi sexual activities. Yet to do that stuff upright? Okay, man, let's move on to some some other stuff. All right. So now we've got all of our negative negativity out of the way. Um, it's time to award the culture of the week. We gotta do this really quickly. Were necessarily We're going to get there,

all right. So my culture of the week, um, and this is to the best culture of this week, to the institution that I think to culture the best. Um, it's gonna go do Walt Disney World yet again. Um, Walt Disney World. I think that they had an American Idol attraction. I think that they're doing everything right. We discussed how how happy it makes everyone to judge people. Well, guess what at American Idol the experience in Disney Hollywood Studios.

It's since closed, but for many years they were able to provide people with the opportunity to judge people live while on a family vacation. So I think that's amazing. And you know, I recently met someone who played the Simon in the show, and um, she seemed lovely and I think that she had a really good time tearing people down while they were paying, um good money to be on a family vacation. And I want to thank Disney for creating that experience and for creating that culture.

Now even you and your family can go rip each other apart absolutely and the family units of others. So thank you. Disney World for this, Thank you Disney. What do you think? Okay? Um, well, it's it's if I am because I was going to go into my Culture the Week, but my Culture the Week was also going to be weal Disney World for the second week in a row, um and again for their commendable uh take

on the American Idol experience. How do you gamify? How do you create a theme park experience for such a specific show, with such a specific, tight format, and that is to open up the judgment process to uh, the entire public and the entire theme park, um, all of

those patrons and so um. I don't personally know anyone who's ever worked on that ride, so I can't speak to that on a on a personal level, but I am sure that everyone who's been a part of that experience has enjoyed it, enjoyed creating that singular experience for Walt Disney World part goers from all over the world. So Anna, what's your culture of the week? My culture of the week is um hair things that are flat,

uh flat ones? Because I didn't know and I went to a wet that wedding and they had a really well stocked basket in the ladies room, like they had a fucking pregnancy test in there. It was like very tricked out. It was tricked out, it had everything in it. And they had here things. I mean, my friend were just like going through and taking things. Um and I took one of their flat here things and it's changing my life. That's great because normally it's round your pony.

When it's flat, it's flat. It flat, it flat flat when your pony, it's flat. So I love that. I agree. Um. So now fulture of the week, it's our failed culture of the week. We talked about the worst culture of Okay, okay, I'm gonna say, um, roll on deodorant because it gets very clumpy when you put it in your armpits. Actually when you have hair, um, when you roll on the deodorant, especially if you're really trying to get it. Good. Um, good luck returning to your arm pit, you know, six

seven hours later and not seeing what are clumps of deodorant. Yeah, very hard. When you make love. Um, when you make love. Well, my faulture of the week, um and this is this is nowhere near it is this is nowhere near as cultured or is um affecting as Matt's I'm sorry Deoran deodorant. Yeah, but my fault of the week failed culture is um the h holistic works of Haruki Murakami. Um. You know what, everyone loves the wind Up Bird Chronicle. It's a fantastic book.

What what a beautiful piece of modern magic realist storytelling. But as a whole, he does not write women well. They are always objects of desire and sexual sexual intercourse. They are not characters with depth, They are never characters with complex emotions. Um. But all of his male protagonists are these repressed, reticent um Japanese men who need sex to complete them. And you know what, it's a tire narrative, hurukee I, I think you should change that, so Boots,

So my little wag of the finger to Huruke Mirakami. Um, I guess I'm sort of behind enemy lines here because my filter is uh, well, Disney World. Um, it is an expensive sunburn. It's a fight with your family that you'll remember forever. Productive and every girl is shoplifted in high school gets married there, So um, it's worthless. It's um culturally bankrupt, I don't it's forced joy, it's the commodification of uh enjoyment, even though there's nothing there that's

inherently enjoyable at all besides alcohol. Um, all joy these days is commodified. Well you know what, actually I think we're about at a time. So um with that, with that, don't push answer, get her out, get her out there, thank you. We do very no hard feelings against Anna. We're talking about well Disney World, but we do want to say we didn't say why we looked like little poops. Um, it's because we're in these wide brim hats. This is large cultu races. We're coming at you with culture, with

with capped culture. We have little hats, were all wearing hats. We're gonna take a beautiful instagram for you. And what's the piece of the merchant that they can get from this episode? Well, man, I think the piece of merchant in this episode is, um, what was that? What was our little thing that we talked about as the culture tip? What wash? Don't get a gaslight culture? Gaslight culture. We're gonna we're gonna make a little napkin, a stack of napkins,

paper napkins. That that's a gaslight culture. Uh yeah, don't gaslight me, don't gaslight me. Bro, it's gonna be a little stack of napkins. And you, yes, you, the last culturetener can own the stack of napkins. There's only going to be one, all right. Thank you guys so much, thank you. And a Dressen please look up, and a Dressen online at an address and she is like a Twitter goddess um and probably a productress, member of Gentlemen Party, host the Open. Michelle used to be used to that

movie every second Friday at the month of Videology. And you're gonna need to buy her book on Amazon. Re order on Amazon. Guys, Bye bye, my grandma and your grandma was sitting back. This has been a Forever Dog production executive produced by Joe Cilio, Alex Ramsay, and Brett Bom. For more podcasts, please visit Forever Dog Productions dot com.