Housewives University. Today, we are doing a deep dive on the artist formerly known as Countess Luanne de les Seppe. Okay, so, Class with the Countess was her etiquette book. I like the branding. She was early on in the game after my book. But I like the branding. I think it's smart. She was married to a count his family presented the Statue of Liberty for the French.
I like it.
Bullshit cells, bullshit is everywhere. She should not be penalized for that. As the Countess so eloquently pointed out, Queen Latifah is not a queen, so she gets to keep her countess crowned. Whether divorced or not, or doing drugs and getting arrested, it doesn't matter. It's all classy. So she wrote a book called Class with the Countess, How to Live with Elegance and Flair. It was not a New York Times bestseller. But I like the branding. I like the name. I like the hypocrisy. I like I
like it all. I like the stupidity, I like the campiness. I like that the gays will like it. I just like it's campy. It's on brand. I'm going to give that book decision.
A B.
I'm not judge grading the actual book, which would be a lower grade, or its success, which would be a lower grade. I'm just as a business idea for the Countess. I'm giving it a bee first record. Money can't buy you class. Money can't buy you class, but it can buy you cocktails. Okay, so that's a great name for It's all satire, and Luanne has leaned into the satire. It doesn't matter that like she thinks, it's like being an author, and like that she's a real royal and
that she's a real musician. But what's real? People are auto tuned? Who cares? Money can't buy you Class is a great tongue in cheek wink satirical song, and it genuinely doesn't matter that she's not a good singer. She's an entertainer, she's a performer and she commits to the bit. It's also getting a bee. I'm not judging her on the quality of the song.
Who cares? I wasn't. I wouldn't be judging Tardy for the party for the quality the song.
Either elegance is learned, it's catchy, it's she's getting a bee.
Money can't buy you Class? It might even be getting a B plus.
Why can't we just give her a B plus A chic, say, lev nah, that's getting a B minus. It's just not as on brand and she's not French, but Eggs LaFrance says she's got a subplot going with this French thing.
Let's just give it a bee. It's stupid.
I don't like she's not it's not as on brands. I don't think of her as French or chic. So you know, she's still wearing the same Jimmy Chew boots that she was wearing the first season of Housewives. I never saw someone wear a Jimmy Chew boot more. She wore it every damn day with a statement necklace every day ending. And why so she's still wearing those though.
It's not that chic. But let's go with a bee girl code? Ouch?
Who is she saying broke the girl code because Leuna slept with everyone's boyfriends are attempted to or flirted with them. But if that's tongue and she I don't know, that's that's we're getting. We're devolving now, that's a B minus. That's so let's just give Luanne a solid Bee for her musical endeavors, Oh Jesus feeling Gravanni. Okay, we get it. Well, she's released you know what. B B plus for Luanne releasing all these albums. Viva La Diva. She's leaning in.
It's satirical, it's tongue in cheek, it's it's very she knows her audience. She's it's very. Bob Mackie, I'm giving it all. A B plus give her a B plus in her musical endeavors. No tour dates currently for the Cabaret News show coming soon, A B plus for the cabaret life is not a cabaret, but Luanne's life is a cabaret. She's got to be making some money. It's not crazy. I think it was doing very well. It's not that easy to fill a room. B plus for
the cabaret Countess Luanne collection clothing fail. She had a line of betting, it's not even on here fail. She planned to do a vodka fail. So now we've got so We've got a lot of B pluses. But for her entire musical career she gets a B plus, including her cabaret, her entertainment career, and her now she has a spin off show. It doesn't matter. It's good marketing. She's getting a B plus for her entire entertainment career, her clothing, her betting, the vodka she planned to do
Countess Vodka, et cetera. She gets an F. The Countess collection of jewelry, she gets a D because it wasn't bad branding because of her statement necklaces her Jose Rose, she gets.
Huh.
She gets an A for effort. She gets an A for effort in being on brand at this time and being sober and doing phose. It's called fo se. Why isn't it called f a u x sa phoes? What is fo like faux show rose like she's She gets an A for the concept, but she gets kind of an F for the name. Wow, I thought it was phosy like fx SC because it looks like fossy, and I'm thinking Bob Fosse because she's like an entertainer. The
name is dreadful. It sounds good, though phose. It sounds good, but someone didn't go to the spelling class, so the name gets pose. The name is gonna have to get a C because it sounds good, it looks terrible. The name is gonna have to get a C. The idea is getting an A and the execution is complete bullshit, saying so now for the season, working on the next better they're not so that.
That's bullshit.
Something went wrong. It's a shitty partner. These ladies have all learned, from Gretchen to Luann to everybody, licensing is a goddamn bitch. It's not for the faint of heart. I've been doing it for over a decade. You make no money until you really make money, and if you're full of fucking hot air, it's not gonna go. So that's why most of these people have to really stay core to like what this audience wants. You go venture off. Nobody needs to sleep, and the count is betting I
can trust you that. Okay, So this is the concept wasn't A The execution seems like it was a D.
That's a B.
Luanne gets a C on her rose she gets She's now averaging that with a B plus from her entire entertainment career. So Luen's between a B and a B minus for her business endeavors. We got, but we took her from an F. She had an F in one class. Luanne had an F in one class, and she got herself up to like a B minus. I would say that's pretty good. How did this happen? Hold on, she got an Let me make sure, Luanne got an F in apparel and any kind of like licensing deal.
She got a C.
In her wine. Oh wait, I make be wrong. She got an F, a C and a B plus. So I screwed up. I didn't average in the F. Okay, hold on, she got a B bus.
We got to call it a B.
I'll put the plus and later. I can't average that. I'm not a mathematician. How do you average a B and an F. It's between a D and a C.
Sere either what's between a C and a D?
So she has a C minus in she has a C minus in entertainment and licensing, and then a C Luanne's business. Luanne's business grade is a C with some failures and some strong points, so she's passing. Luan has passed Housewives University