So do you have a boyfriend or are you just dating? And I'm not trying to pry and I you don't have to tell me anything. I just want to know about dating at our age and what your experience has been online all of it.
I'm dating.
Uh So I did have a boyfriend recently, Yeah, I mean we've dated for a while, we've dated over a year. We dated, but I am dating now.
But you're still dating that guy too?
Off and on?
Does he And are you cagey because you just want to keep it private or he wants to keep a private because of what's gone on the guy you're dating, you're obviously No.
He's very public now. He wants to be very public. He doesn't have anything, he doesn't mind being public. You are keeping it on a round No. I just think that, first of all, I've never dated before. I'm very much a relationship person. I've literally all my life gone from one relationship to another, and this is my first time ever really dating. Really, I've been in a relationship for twenty five years with Greg, and he was my husband, so he wasn't my boyfriend. And I met this guy,
I liked him. I just think that we're not right for each other.
Where did you meet him?
We met at a place in Atlanta.
So are you so it's a different world of dating. Are you open to online dating?
I'm scared, but I'm open.
And the reason why I say I'm scared is because the like, do I get to see him first?
Because the blind day thing, I can't. I can see him. Oh yeah, I want to. But would they look like their picture?
They look like they the best they'll look is their worst picture.
I mean, I would be open.
It's really good, is it?
Because that would be all like.
You know how we were here, so we were both young.
I just don't know that I would want my pitch to be like floating around like so people publicly online will be like, oh, Nini's on this dating.
Site, but you gotta by the way. Okay, So a couple of things. First of all, Nani and I are both like, we don't like a lot of for play and work. We're like, all right, it's all great, the smart let's get going. So we like to get going. So the thing about online dating, and I was one of the last to go. I had a girl tell me, and I thought to myself, I can't do that. And
I felt exposed. And I used to go on when I started and then scurry out because when someone knew who I was and they would make a reference, be like, well, I'm not rich because they think that I need to be with someone rich, I would then feel like they knew everything about me. They thought they knew everything about me, and I knew nothing about them. So I felt like it wasn't a level playing field. But what I ended up really liking about it is that it's very efficient.
So it's like online shopping. You don't have to go into the store and you don't have to come home empty handed like you are online shopping. And what's interesting about it is you'll get a guy that you're talking to, and like they'll say things to you that you would normally not say in a first date, like what are you really looking for? Or do you want a real relationship because they don't want to waste time. They want to know. Ultimately, are you here to get laid? Are
you here to get fed? Or are you here to get married? They want to know. And so in that case, it's like you can go into the store knowing exactly what you want, how tall you you could be like, I am not dating someone who's shorter than five eleven. That's my rule. I stand by it, and you're not breaking it. You could be like, I'm not dating someone that's not Jewish. I'm you know, like you really get to like choose, and it's like going into a bar.
If you went into a bar and someone saw you and knows your needy and you they're nobody like that you've never heard of, it's still not eleven playing field, and you still have to feel weird. So you can like cyberstalk them and go onto other apps and see what they are doing on Instagram.
And stuff like I'm not against it. Marriage for me is don't have to ever get married again. I've been married at me, no way. If it happened, it would just happen. It would be anything that I'm looking for at all. But I definitely want a good relationship.
I think.
And you have to be emotionally available to date me, because these guys are not emotionally available, honey, And that.
Is a problem.
Well, you have to be emotionally available to online date. First of all, A lot of those people are going to be there for different reasons and just want to get later or get bored. But that's like a bar too, and that is a bad rap because if you're a good shopper, which I was, there's great stuff in there, but it's like going to Tjmax, I have.
To shop for me.
Yeah I will, I'm really good.
You picture out there.
I had my picture out there and it didn't really get out that much, and I thought that was interesting. But somebody would be like, oh, I think I saw that the on Bumble, and I would cringe and get uncomfortable because you feel like.
You're losing I do.
Everybody's doing it. It's like saying online shopping, Oh my god, everybody's doing it.
But if I got on Bumble, I mean, what level are these men?
No? You would no, I know know all the men. It's the same thing. The same men are on Rayah that are on Bumble, that are on Exclusive have matchmakers because when somebody wants to First of all, very successful and smart businessmen think about it, how are they going to be successful? They don't have the time to screw around, like twenty five year olds going to a bar and like having seven shots. They're working, so they're very efficient.
It's a very business minded thing. To do because you're efficient.
I like young a little younger too, and a little younger.
You get so great. Put it on the menu. You get to online shop, you could put your filters, sort your filters, and there are little ways on different apps to like get a different crop of men like you can and you get full. You don't want to, like eat too much of the buffet and flip through too many because then you just get nauseated and you want to like back up. But I was at Kathy Hilton's house a couple of years ago when I was online dating several years ago, and there were some major women.
There's some major people there, as you imagine, and girls who like are well known people. They were all like, of course, of course i'm online data.
But were they public figures where people were looking like oh my gosh.
Yes, they were public, but not as forward facing as you. But like, yes, someone could look up that they were a socialite or they have a successful blog enough that they too. Would you think they wouldn't be online? I've seen you've never seen on riya. I saw ben Affleck really, uh huh? I saw oh ya, yeah, that thing.
I did try that thing when my husband first passed and it's never called me back or whatever.
Never.
No, No, Rio's not for you. Riot's for people in skull caps with tattoos doing yoga poses in bali and women in bikinis that are drink like drinking asai or macha and like it's very that really yeah, and it's a lot of very like producery, very Williamsburg like flannel. I'm very cool.
My girlfriend someone there ryah.
Yeah, yeah, but they're all Raya's just Raya's like Barney's where it's mostly was mostly high quality, but often you go in there and you're like, I know it's all expensive, but there's nothing I really want to buy here.
Okay, you know, I get that, you know what I'm saying.
I mean, you may not want like and then Mace bumbles more like Macy's, Like there are some really high end brands in there, but you gotta weed through a lot of stuff.
I see. That is scary, it.
Is, but you find some good stuff I've seen.
And how were you able to go on a date when people didn't fan out, Like, oh my god, I'm want a date with bathing me ticks one of my buddies.
Because I found I mean I met Paul online dating.
Yeah, but I'm saying, but you dated someone like you went on one of those dates before you.
Got with him.
Yes. And my other thing was, if you're gonna get listen, you're going to spend an hour and twenty minute you do back to backs. You got to meet a couple of people. You don't want to make them too close to each other, so it could be awkward. But you gotta like you're you're you're for the day. You're staying at a hotel in New York or something, and you have work and you're there, like you're having drinks there.
Then you're going across the street. You got to be efficient. Yeah, we'll see if you're leaving the house.
I would like to be hooked up.
Wait, so what's your type? You have to have a type.
My type is definitely tall, dark.
And handsome, Tall, dark and handsome.
With a fat pocket.
With a fat pocket, Listen, that's what I'm saying. You go in there and if you know that you're not messing with broke, then don't mess it broke. Like you go into the store online, you go to a bar, you have no way of knowing. You need to be like show me your w two.
No, I won't be doing that at a bar.
Yeah, I don't think they bring it with them a bar is meaning yeah.
I know they don't.
You got it? You got it online day, That's what I think.
Yeah, but I would like to be hooked up and yeah, I would like to be hooked up with someone, like for someone to call me up and be like, Nini, my dad is single and he's successful, he's gorgeous and he's been married. Because I like the guy that's had a relation along relationship ship before guy. Yeah, well there's there's you guys that have not Oh I dated this girl for four years and that broke up, and I dated this one for two that some of these guys
who they're moving around. So I would rather someone called me up or emailed me, by the way, Bookmini at gmail dot com.
Book Nini at gmail dot com. I'm working for you. I've been.
I've been.
It's it's important to say that I'm so flattered that Nini and Alvin, who works with her, who's here, asked me to be her christ Jenna. I am so honored and humbled, and I really have to say, you could do it. I could do it. I've been I've been doing a decent job. Yeah, I've been doing dipping my toe. You can do it, you know, in addition to parenting, doing relief work and running my business.
You have to do is have a good talent, and I am back beyond and so you can do it.
I'm Niani's I mean you can take just like Chris one hundred percent. I definitely can. I definitely can. It's funny because people often think, like, I'm not a billionaire.
I don't.
I haven't ever had the aspirations to work as hard as they all work collectively. Like I really like time with my daughter. I really like downtime. I like you like traveling, I as much as I like working. I like working too, but I like relaxing too. I like a balance. I generally do like a balance. I really think at our age, the older you get, you really start to value your health so much more. And I don't want it to be all about the grind and
being on planes all the time and dehydrated. So I like, I you're not going to bury all your money with you. So I think I think money's good, But I'm I'm not. I'm not like I don't have that voracious hunger where it's money driven, If that makes sense. I'm addicted to the idea. What's the age age range for you?
Well, my last boyfriend was in his forties and that's okay. Yeah, I would say forty five up.
And so what give me the last three dates you've gone on? Where did you go? What did you do?
What was it like the last three dates?
Yeah, you said you're dating, Well, I mean I'm what is a dating meeting for a drink? What's a date?
Dinner? Okay, dinner and cocktails. That's a nice date. That's a beautiful date.
Yeah, but you have you taken it to the next level where you're cooking for someone or you're eating your home or no.
No, no, I will not be I do know how to cook very well, but that won't happen very soon.
Agreed. Yeah, I agree? Okay, And also probably won't even come over for a while. And you're an empty nester now, so you get to travel whatever you want. You could date anywhere, would you live anywhere?
Depending upon I would be bicosed, So I'm not against that. But I will always have a home in the in Atlanta area. That's where my family.
Is, and I think we've made it clear that you will not. You may find some the love of your life, you may have a committed partner. You will not be getting legally married again.
If it happened, I'm not against it, but I'm definitely out here looking for I want to get married.
No, if it just happens, it just happens.
If that's something that me and this person just, you know, decide, we just want to get married. But I feel like you can have a life partner and get the same thing out of it, right, one.
Hundred No partnership, Yeah, well, I think that that's what I was telling those girls at that dinner that with the fairy tale, they don't realize. I believe at our age, like love, partnership, loyalty and peace is an amazing relationship. At that age, it was the chemistry. And you know, not that I have chemistry with Paul. We've been together five years, but we also have divorces, we have kids,
we have businesses. Like it's not as sexy as it used to be, yes, but I find like peace and love and like depth and loyalty that to be that's the new sexy when you're in your fifties.
In my opinion, yes, yeah, very much.
And you had that with Greg.
Yes, but Greg and I were married, I know.
But I'm saying you were married for so many years, I'm sure it got boring.
I don't know that it got boring.
I mean there were times when we did have a period where we didn't see eye to eye, But in our later years together, I had a whole new love and respect for Greg. Like and one thing about Greg and I, and this this gives me all jacked up, is that Greg and I dated every week. And that was not a planned That was not a plan. It was not on the schedule. It just happened for us like that. Because he would maybe call me up and say, hey, I haven't had lunch.
Have you eaten yet?
And I said, no, Well won't you meet me down the street that you know, it could be a little neighborhood spot, you know, the tacos stand, and let's grab a couple of tacos and then I have a meeting coming up at six or five or something, and we would just naturally get together like that, and.
It could be dinner.
He said, I'm not cooking, and he said, okay, let's just go so and so on the neighborhood and grab something. And then there were dates that we plan, like Friday night, we're going out with our other friends and dad. But Greg and I always dated. And the other thing is that Greg and I was always from day one to the last day. We were always attracted to each other.
Wow, and you're both social creatures. Yeah, see, I'm Paul and I are both not social creatures. So it's harder because somebody has to pull somebody out to go out if you get stale, like you both don't really want to go, but we're both a little bit. Like last night, that dinner was very out of character for me. I burst, I'm out, I burst, and it's like I get activated because I'm home a lot. And so then when we're together, we're kind of nesting and it has to be like,
let's go do something. But it's often just the two of us, so it's not like we're going out with a bunch of different people. And it's also fabulous.
So that's why you have to really like your partners. So oftentimes it was just me and Greg, and then the person I was just dating, it was always just he and I, and so for the weekend. We're like, what are we doing for the weekend. It's like nothing, So let's just go to freaking let's just go to London for the weekend.
And we would just literally go like that.
We're good at doing the trips and that stuff and then getting dipped out every night and having an experience that we're very good at. Yeah, though I like that too, Paul is very good with that. It's being home that sometimes we get into a right and it could even be where I'm like, let's go on a nature walk, let's go to the beach, like just to do something different than the normal, because a lot of times because
of my work, then I'm like recovering. I'm here and I'm bursting with you, and I'm bursting last night and I haven't appeared. So then I get home and we're just sort of like watching TV and recovering, and I want to make that time.
It's nice.
It's nice too. It's a great nesting space, but I need more about We talk about it a lot that we need more balance there in a little more action, you know. And I don't know, did you used to bring to Greg to all your work things?
Because I did bring him to a lot of work things, and then I think we kind of had a good balance on that too. If he had something he had to do, he didn't come. And you know, I do some things on my own. And even with my boyfriend, I was bringing him with me to work. And that's because I don't travel with a large circle of people. I don't have like a giant team. I'm not that
girl with everybody. My circle is very small, and I want to be with people that I know, that I can trust in, people who I feel really have my back, and so my circle is small and I want to you know, I just wanted my man to be there with me. And my husband was like that too, And there's times when I traveled alone or travel without him.
But yeah, yeah, because I feel like with business events, I work well alone because I'm working a room and I have goal.
Well, that has kind of happened with me and my boyfriend. That might Yeah, the guy was dating. I kind of felt like, not with Greg, but with him, it's best if I go to work without him. I wait, yeah, it's something about it didn't work for because.
You're thinking in your life, you're self conscious about what he's thinking.
Of that, and I needed to be you.
Know, I need to be in a good place when I'm at work. I need to be able to give my all presentence. Yeah, and I felt like with him, I couldn't do that.
I totally That's what I'm saying. Like, you're working and you don't mind being alone. You would work a room alone? Yeah, I just do. I'm a good alone worker in that regard. You feel that you would have been with Greg till the end had he not gotten sick.
Yeah, for sure, because like Jada in will Greg.
And I, you know, this is our second marriage together and we just said we're not gonna get a divorce, work it out.
Well that's what they said too. I remember you we would.
Never have lived in two different.
Homes, right, Yeah. Well anyway, I love the Jada and Willard what's defining our whole conversation. But it's so true because years ago they said, like, divorce is not an option. But I think there are many different reasons why people choose that. I think finances is a lot of it. It's college people, you know.
Yeah, and then just getting older.
I think, you know, people are afraid to divorce and be single, and you need somebody to have take care of you. Just being alone very interesting.
There are many different reasons like yours. One of your sons was from a previous marriage, and Greg.
Treated my previous relationship in that man.
Previous relationship, and Greg treated him like his son of course. Okay, so that's a big thing too. That was a big thing that attracted you to Greg the way he was.
My son was little then, now me dating the guy. My my sons are young men. They they will have their opinions. They would tell me about it. And of course the guy needs to be very kind and respectful to my kids. But it's a little bit different now that they're adult.
What do you think of your kids? Two kids? Had any grandkids?
Three?
So both kids have kids? Okay, so you have.
So well, my youngest son doesn't want any children.
So your other son has three kids, and what do you think of his parenting style? Their parenting style compared.
To yours quite different. I was young when I had my oldest child, and he was young when he had his kids as well. I just think the younger generation, the the millennials, are just quite different.
Do you well, what is it do you like ever? Butt heads as a mother in law about you don't get involved in parenting at all.
I don't.
Only early on I remember having my granddaughter and I think they were telling me that she can't eat this, or she can't have some things I don't know, some sweets or some something, and and I said to them, you know, well, when she's at my house, I am the grandmother. So well, we're eating popsicles and everything we want to eat over here, and you guys have to worry about her stomach hurting when you get back home.
You know.
Grandparents are for Yeah, like, I am not saying those rules, and I can't handle it.
No.
Yes, And so I tell my son all the time, we are creating memories. So when I have them, they do whatever I want them to do. So I was able to raise you guys, you're you're okay, so they'll be fine.
And how often do you have them?
I get them.
I try to get them for big trips. We do about three trips a year together. So I get them doing spring break time.
Wow. I get them in the summer for a couple of weeks.
We always go out to the beach or somewhere and hang out. They love it. They love it and I'll get them over.
The Christmas holiday with your son che or it's just you and the kid.
No, this is.
What they're like, dropping them off, like bye bye bye.
What did I call you?
Glama?
Glama?
That's really yeah. Yeah they're good. I love them. They're night work.