243 – And Now We Are Five
In which we celebrate a red-letter birthday with a look back at five years of milestones, favorite moments, dubious headwear, and our own convoluted continuity!
Apr 15, 2019•1 hr 1 min•Season 1Ep. 243
Jay & Miles X-Plain the X-Men
Because It's About Time Someone Did
Episodes
242 – Spider-Mansfield Park
In which we encounter one of comics’ greatest rarities; Spider-Man cannot actually do whatever a spider can; Flash Thompson subscribes to the X-Factor school of child endangerment; alliteration is the source of a very specific sort of powers; Spider-Man is not Phil; guilt is Spider-Man’s greatest motivator; we root for the antagonists; Guido Carosella would be an epic Twitter monster; a lot of people have hung out with the X-Men; and Glob Herman is a lovable, gross mystery.
Apr 08, 2019•43 min•Season 1Ep. 242
241 – Conducive to Moral Subversion
In which Quicksilver wants you to know that he’s not cool; X-Factor gets a new government liaison; a danger room on a jet is a terrible idea; this team is bad at feelings; Forge is a pretty okay boss; and it remains exceptionally difficult to be Rahne Sinclair.
Apr 01, 2019•54 min•Season 1Ep. 241
240 – Live at ECCC 2019, feat. Vita Ayala, Seanan McGuire, & Leah Williams
In which we sit down live at Emerald City Comic Con with writers Vita Ayala, Seanan McGuire, and Leah Williams to talk Age of X-Man, the intergenerational legacy of X-Men, and telling stories in the pauses.
Mar 25, 2019•59 min•Season 1Ep. 240
239 – Rap and Rumble (feat. Max Carleton)
In which we enter the era of bomber jackets; the covers are the cards; Genosha remains neither green nor pleasant; the A is for “Avengers,” not “A-list”; Henry Peter Gyrich is the straightest of men; Cyclops sets an important precedent; Exodus is a huge jerk; we speculate about movies we have definitely not seen; Stephen Strange is not a qualified OBGYN; the Avengers are really weird even by our standards; and Max manages to connect two of Marvel’s most complicated family trees.
Mar 19, 2019•1 hr 6 min•Season 1Ep. 239
238 – Meet Them Where They Are
In which X-Force is the new New Mutants; Professor is what Cable has instead of a burn book; Cable develops emotional literacy; Jay has a lot of feelings about Shatterstar; Cowboys can be wizards, too; you really shouldn’t call adult people “child”; privilege is truly the greatest superpower; Cameron Hodge remains improbably difficult to kill; Candy Southern gets to write the ending to her own story; and Emerald City Comic Con is coming up REALLY fast!
Mar 11, 2019•1 hr•Season 1Ep. 238
237 – X-Treme
In which there is only one Big Pine Key; Empyrean is actually a pretty sensible dude; the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants are ride-or-die; you should probably avoid setting X-Men stories in Phoenix, Arizona; Adam X the X-Treme is the Longshot of the 1990s; Miles adopts a ship; and heteronormativity is why we can’t have nice things.
Mar 04, 2019•53 min•Season 1Ep. 237
236 – Baggage of Traumas Past (Fatal Attractions, Part 3)
In which Decimation was kind of sketchy; you should definitely come see us in Seattle; Wolverine has a rough day; Colossus has yet another rough day; Excalibur plans for the future; and Fatal Attractions comes to a close.
Feb 25, 2019•1 hr 4 min•Season 1Ep. 236
235 – Fatal Extractions (Fatal Attractions, Part 2)
In which Magneto may or may not own a Namor body pillow; Cyclops probably doesn’t color-code his files; Colossus is Not Okay; bats are nature’s flashers; there are a lot of reasons to be mad at Fatal Attractions; Charles Xavier is surprisingly durable; the X-Men know their Aeschylus; Jean Grey goes in through the face; and bringing Wolverine to fight the guy who controls metal was probably not a great idea.
Feb 18, 2019•1 hr 7 min•Season 1Ep. 235
234 – Magnetic Feels (Fatal Attractions Part 1)
In which the Acolytes are pretty terrible; Exodus considers his options; Val Cooper is not wildly trustworthy; Cable uses his words; and people with significant metal implants should probably stop confronting Magneto.
Feb 11, 2019•50 min•Season 1Ep. 234
233 – Electromagnetism Unlimited
In which X-Men Unlimited begins; Cyclops’s powers remain wildly inconsistent; electromagnetic fields are the gamma rays of the early ‘90s; Siena Blaze should probably take some science courses; Magneto is a complex dude; and the Marvel Universe could really use adequate mental healthcare.
Feb 04, 2019•1 hr 4 min•Season 1Ep. 233
232 – Careful With That Axe, Cerise
In which we’re still not over Into the Spider-Verse; Excalibur becomes an official X-book; Feron tries to help; Butts are fundamental; we care about the weird stuff; threats are unnecessary; and we were all always already Erik the Red.
Jan 28, 2019•46 min•Season 1Ep. 232
231 – Life Bites
In which DC is out of our bailiwick; Random gets around; someone finally makes an explicit reference to disability politics; death has not improved the Chalkers; Strong Guy can’t catch a break; we’re all whole other people; Sienna Blaze has a crayon name; we totally want to play D&D with Evan Skolnick; a trading card does not a memorable character make; and we are 100% here for the mutant episode of Sesame Street.
Jan 21, 2019•1 hr•Season 1Ep. 231
230 – Touchstones
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which tragedy strikes; leisure suits are underappreciated; Jubilee is fundamentally opposed to feelings; that MCU joke would definitely have been hilarious; we have trouble accepting Beast as a 20-something; when Gambit and Rogue work, they work; Wolverine makes an unlikely agony aunt; Dr. Strange was the mentor Illyana Rasputin really needed; and What If: Magik is pretty much a perfect comic. X-PLAINED: The Human High Council Many ...
Jan 14, 2019•1 hr 1 min•Season 1Ep. 230
229 – Giant-Size Special #7
In which we are beset by festivity; Scott Summers still can’t take a vacation; the Daysprings are a really good family; “G’journey” is a really good greeting; Stryfe is his own namesake; retcons have served Cable well; illustrator David Wynne makes his X-Plain podcast debut; and you should probably go ahead and get a shelf for all these awards.
Dec 31, 2018•2 hr 10 min•Season 1Ep. 229
228 – Thinkin’ Shorts
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which it still sucks to be a Rasputin; John Romita Jr. has a solid, if muscular, grasp of anatomy; Jay and Miles are better exes than Forge and anyone; and Cannonball’s many younger siblings have almost prepared him for running X-Force. X-PLAINED: Peters Parker The Merry X-Men Holiday Special Comic book release schedules vs. J&MXPtXM Uncanny X-Men #301-302 Trevor F**king Fitzroy, possibly the worst Upstart Comics Code Authority clos...
Dec 24, 2018•55 min•Season 1Ep. 228
227 – Wolverine, Killing
In which Cowboy Poet Wolverine is the best Wolverine; the Masters of the Universe basically had Internet Cat names; Miles has an Early Metallica moment; Wolverine: Killing is just ludicrously excellent; and the hawk joke is somehow still going.
Dec 16, 2018•57 min•Season 1Ep. 227
226 – Les Mutants
In which Havok actually used to be pretty great; there are at least four attorneys in the Marvel Universe; Genosha continues to be wildly problematic; Hieronymus Bosch was not Comics Code-compliant; Quicksilver goes on vacation; Polaris has no time for your love triangle; Wolfsbane can maul as many magistrates as she wants; and Multiple Man makes a choice.
Dec 10, 2018•59 min•Season 1Ep. 226
225 – Class Reunion (feat. Austin Gorton)
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which we check in on Firestar and the New Warriors; superheroes often celebrate Bring Your Mom To The Amazon Day; Fabian Nicieza employs only the finest of lampshades; and Emma Frost still doesn’t apologize for blowing up that pony. X-PLAINED: Vance Astro(vik) Penance (but not that one) Austin Gorton's X-Aminations New Warriors #10 Firestar (Angelica Jones) The New Warriors Visual representations of invisible mutant powers The Helli...
Dec 03, 2018•1 hr 8 min•Season 1Ep. 225
224 – Fix the Future
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which Alan Davis performs his pièce de résistance; the personification of Death is surprisingly supportive; Rachel Summers is the One True Phoenix; Kitty Pryde goes full '90s; syntax saves the world; and the first Excalibur series should really have ended with #67. X-PLAINED: Origins of Phoenix mythology Excalibur #61-67 The Phoenix Force (more) (again) Rachel Summers (more) (again) Earth-811 (more) (again) Phoenix vs. Galactus A pe...
Nov 26, 2018•54 min•Season 1Ep. 224
223 – Live at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which Dracula probably doesn't drink his blood from a World's Greatest Dad mug; Miles massively underestimates the cultural ubiquity of Sexy Dracula; Bill Sienkiewicz may or may not have ever seen a bat; Kitty gets possessed; and Dazzler is singularly well suited to a Vegas residency. X-PLAINED: Dracula's ungrateful children Marvel Dracula A fortuitously named writer Rachel Van Helsing X-Men #159 (again) (briefly) Sexy Dracula The s...
Nov 19, 2018•40 min•Season 1Ep. 223
222 – A Tale of Two Betsys
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which it has been a pretty intense month; there is a lot to unpack about Psylocke; we are confused by hip teen lingo; Cyclops definitively lacks game; organized crime is anything but; and the mystery of the third Summers brother officially begins. X-PLAINED: How the Maximoffs joined the Avengers X-Cutioner's Song fallout An X-ceptionally convoluted set of retcons X-Men #20-23 How not to repair an airplane One way to get out of an aw...
Nov 12, 2018•1 hr 1 min•Season 1Ep. 222
221 – Better Than LEGO
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which Miles stops worrying and learns to love X-Force; you should absolutely not google the phrase "face jam"; the kids take a field trip to Graymalkin; Jay reverse-engineers Shatterstar's hair; Donald Pierce gets a new job; Sam Guthrie is the most trustworthy man in the Marvel Universe; Cable is your guns grandma; Professor earns its name; X-Force really only has one setting; and not every Sluggo is lit. X-PLAINED: A bunch of stuff...
Nov 06, 2018•58 min•Season 1Ep. 221
220 – On Your Bike
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which we approach the end of Alan Davis's Excalibur run; "duopenultimate" is not actually a word; Captain Britain pops the question; we do in fact (kinda) get follow-up on Alysande Stuart's death; Miles needs to get a little less credulous about bureaucrats' good intentions; Shadowcat engages in espionage; Nightcrawler and Cerise are tactically saucy; and the sun definitely ought to set on the British Empire. X-PLAINED: Warpies Exca...
Oct 29, 2018•55 min•Season 1Ep. 220
219 – Brutal Hearts: An Appreciation of Emma Frost (feat. Seanan McGuire, Leah Williams, Tea Fougner, Kel McDonald, and Diana Fox)
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which Jay recruits X-writers Seanan McGuire and Leah Williams, cosplayer Tea Fougner, and innocent bystanders Kel McDonald and Diana Fox, for a night of Emma Frost appreciation. X-PLAINED: Why Emma Frost is amazing; why we love her; and why you should, too. NEXT EPISODE: Return of the RCX! WHITE QUEEN COCKTAIL RECIPE: Combine: 1.5 oz gin .5 oz rose elderflower syrup Splash of elixir vegetal Prosecco to fill glass Top off with: Smoke...
Oct 22, 2018•1 hr 11 min•Season 1Ep. 219
218 – Careful What You Lick
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which X-Cutioner's Song may be over, but its repercussions continue; Uncanny X-Men hits a major milestone; superhero comics are and always have been political; Bishop learns to banter; the X-Men gain an unlikely ally; and Magneto remains exceptionally difficult to kill. X-PLAINED: Jay & Miles at VVCBF Uncanny X-Men #298-300 The Acolytes (more) (again) The Upstarts (more) (again) Several important lessons A very fancy room A very fan...
Oct 15, 2018•1 hr 2 min•Season 1Ep. 218
217 – Piotr the Obscure
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which it sucks to be a Rasputin; X-Men and Uncanny X-Men muddy the waters; Cyclops and Psylocke's weird flirtation somehow manages to get even more awkward; Colossus has a long series of bad days; and you should totally come see us at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival. X-PLAINED: An atypical curriculum Jay & Miles at Vegas Valley Comic Book Festival X-Men #17-19 What Colossus and Magik have been up to X-Men title disambiguation The t...
Oct 08, 2018•53 min•Season 1Ep. 217
216 – X-Amining X-Factor (feat. Dr. Andrea Letamendi)
In which Dr. Andrea Letamendi of Arkham Sessions joins us to analyze some analysis; Doc Samson has major scope-of-practice issues; Ren & Stimpy references continue to fail to age well; it's hard to be Quicksilver; Val Cooper is not your friend; Polaris pretty much always deserves better; Charles Xavier should not be allowed to inhabit positions of power; and labels are often not the best tools for good representations of mental illness and neurodivergence. X-PLAINED: A very high-stakes 3-D puzzl...
Oct 01, 2018•1 hr 13 min•Season 1Ep. 216
215 – Mon de Orb Uno
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which we finally emerge from the other side of X-Cutioner's Song; rich people are different from us; Brian Braddock is probably not comfortable with menstruation; Dai Thomas cleans up pretty well; someone FINALLY remembers Sat-Yr-9; Psylocke knows how to defend herself from a man armed with a banana; the (non-Internet) trolls return; and we are fairly sure that Gambit does not actually speak French. X-PLAINED: Winzeldorf Excalibur (...
Sep 24, 2018•52 min•Season 1Ep. 215
214 – Stryfe’s Burn Book
Art by David Wynne. Wanna buy the original? Drop him a line! In which "wolves" proves a remarkably broad category in the 616; we at least nominally wrap up X-Cutioner's Song; Stryfe could really use a style guide; we issue our first-ever music challenge; Jubilee is an agent of chaos; Gambit's powers are a metaphor; Charles Xavier has a complicated relationship to disability; the quality of Jay's penmanship is a matter of official record; Boom Boom is a remarkably good costume designer; Cannonbal...
Sep 17, 2018•1 hr 3 min•Season 1Ep. 214