If you were one of Santa's little helpers, aka an elf, would you make toys or hand out yummy hot chocolate and candy canes. Someone (Lisa) thinks she would kill it as a toy maker, but what kid wants a half made toy... squirrel! Lisa is not going to stress out these next few weeks about her poor choices, fuck it she'll do better next year! Should you use something if it could be flammable even if it tastes delicious? Can you self soothe yourself back to sleep, and would a Carpenters playlist help...
Dec 16, 2022•1 hr 11 min
Lisa is taking a stand on finding the perfect Christmas gift. It's not her job! She is going to gift card her way through Christmas, and she's okay with it! Sam attempts to start gift shopping, and she is over it. She started talking to herself in the clothing store, and well, she gave up after that. Should grocery stores ask us to give up our points to help a charity, and will Lisa ever get Sheila's baking? Can a person love and hate a Netflix documentary all at once and what's up with the mini...
Dec 09, 2022•1 hr 17 min
Who is the best fake baker in Saskatoon, well it's Lisa of course! She can't decide on her holiday theme for the Christmas bake off and has no clue what she will do for the show stopper. Can Lisa pull this off, well probably cause it's fake...right. Sam is humming a merry tune hearing about the 3rd instalment of Magic Mike, yes! Lisa is all in on Operation Jo Koy and finally found her Christmas spirit! Would buying no name products save you money and why are New Year's resolutions so disappointi...
Dec 02, 2022•1 hr 16 min
Pardon me, why does Merica pardon a turkey on Thanksgiving? Lisa is wondering what the criteria is to be taken off the chopping block. Sam wonders if Canadians love Merica Thanksgiving more than their own? Lisa is trying to find her holiday spirit and she believes our holiday personalities are defined by our youth. She's grandma got run over by a reindeer and Sam is rocking around the Christmas tree. Is it time for John to go taste test a Dunkin donuts pancake taco? Do you have a tell, because L...
Nov 25, 2022•1 hr 17 min
After a slight disagreement Lisa and Sam bond over similar puffy coat issues. Their cardigans are too thicky and it's causing numbness and tingling in their arms. It's a total coat conundrum! Don't even get them started about ski pants!! Does watching someone fix a heater make you an electrician? How many 'practice' advent calendars is too many and what is the message when vandalising art? Do you know Jenny’s number and what does the phrase two peas in a pod really mean? Christmas oranges have g...
Nov 18, 2022•1 hr 20 min
The snow apocalypse happened last weekend and shovelling snow became the new pastime. Guess who got FOMO and asked her hubby to buy her a shovel, yup Lisa! Mike laughed hysterically at the suggestion and so did Sam! Is she really Ready For This? Lisa has been thinking she needs to partake in a kick line which stunned Sam into silence. Huh? Does anything good come from taking a personality quiz and is it too soon for Christmas music? Can you disagree on the sexiest man alive and hooters in one co...
Nov 11, 2022•1 hr 13 min
How did we live without GPS? Maps don't even! Lisa believes North is always the direction her nose is pointing. They both wonder where is there and how do you get there? Shirley to god, Shirley would know! Eggnog is taking over and Lisa wants nothing to do with it! Sam is hopped up on Hallmark christmas movies and Lisa has found her joy immersed in the reruns of Friends. There is a magical salad update and disappointment around the McRib. What's up with Shirley and have you ever really listened ...
Nov 04, 2022•1 hr 18 min
Hey friends of the podcast Lisa lost her voice so this week's episode is a peek into the extra episodes we do for Patreon. We dug around and found some fun episodes that we hope brighten your day! Lisa is envious of a tik tok influencer's hair and both admit they may not be Canadian enough. Thanks a lot canuckle! Lisa has reignited her love for Sylvester Stallone while Sam wonders why his face looks so shiny. Stadium food vs rink food which is better? If you got it flaunt it but naked skiing and...
Oct 28, 2022•1 hr 34 min
What do you get when you put roller skating and happy hour wine together...you get a new sport called Skwining!!! Yes!! Music, disco balls and wine are the ultimate combination! Do your clothes non verbally tell you how they are feeling and when did Arvil Lavigne's music become retro? Lisa is obsessed over her boss's glistening salad while Sam can't help herself but comment on Lisa's hair woes. Did Lisa unexpectedly blow up a FB post with talk of stuffing and do you let out your inner rockstar w...
Oct 21, 2022•1 hr 13 min
Lisa is getting all riled up about maple bugs, the Jays lost season and major makeup angst. There is anger in her heart and it's boiling over! There is a glimmer of happiness, they got mentioned in an article in Reader's Digest about the 10 funny podcasts! Sweet!! Foot under the covers or outside the covers when you get hot? Are you a problem solver or a seeker of problems? Could the butter board craze be encouraging us to eat like cavemen? Is the Extra chewing gum commercial suggesting human in...
Oct 14, 2022•1 hr 20 min
Judgy Lisa and pick a part Sam is making an appearance this episode. Lisa is judging Jo Koy, nursery rhymes, and butter boards! While Sam picks apart Lisa's diet habits, and weird song titles.If you get a speeding ticket do you acknowledge your lawlessness, not Lisa! She is done Dahmer and is moving onto Gacy with a little Jo Koy to break things up! She won't admit it but pick a part Sam was right about the latest Jo Koy Netflix special. Which phrase do you use, "bat shit crazy" or "Bobs your un...
Oct 07, 2022•1 hr 22 min
Sometimes you see things you just can't unsee, like a soiled mattress. Lisa claims, no one needs to see your roadmap of nastiness! The fakefan is either on strike or she's retiring! The nice weather has encouraged people to bare gnarly feet and those clothes now seem a bit too small. Lisa reminisces about 70's restaurants serving melba toast and tomato juice and why is it when someone is trending on twitter we automatically think they've died? Should we watch the Jeffery Dahmer series, yay or na...
Sep 30, 2022•1 hr 20 min
Lisa is trying to convince Sam that they should be adventurous and do the One Chip Challenge. That is hard no from Sam and a will be trying it from Lisa. Sam fears for her stomach, tongue and all the body parts that would be injured by eating the Paqui Chip. It turns your tongue blue...WTF! The Queen's corgis got Lisa in the heart strings. What gets you weeping at a funeral and should sandwiches be served? Lisa sounds the dirty bird alert and Sam ponders why humans can't learn from their mistake...
Sep 23, 2022•1 hr 29 min
Lisa's week was a bit tougher with the passing of the Queen. She received so many messages of condolences which prompted her to remind everyone she's not related to the Queen. In typical HHG fashion she was late to the Queen's “pretty cool” party. This changes so many things like the squad, money and apparently condiments? A bad experience eating out led to a Dear Dennys and shouldn't a sweater keep you warm, Dear Shaker Knit? Kangaroos as a house pet, yay or nay? All doors should be a push not ...
Sep 16, 2022•1 hr 18 min
Let's take a step back into the 70's and remember a time where the soap, washcloth and bath water was communal. Rub a dub dub in the tub takes on a whole new meaning! Thanks for the visual Lisa! Sam is excited about a new Prime show and Lisa wants a bit of originality with seasonal treats. Is anyone else missing The Ellen show besides Lisa? Maybe she needs a support group? What do you judge people for and is a best for date a suggestion or a warning? What does the CLUB in club sandwich stand for...
Sep 09, 2022•1 hr 11 min
Is flying cheap really leisurely or is it a nightmare waiting to happen! The ladies are envisioning benches and parachutes with the new airliner Canadian Jetliner. Will they be better or just add to the chaos? Lisa is remembering Princess Diana and Sam is hooked on an HGTV show. Has the indifference of the fakefan caused the downfall of the Bluejays and should people have sex at a baseball game? What's the weirdest spam email landing in your inbox? Should a children's classic become a slasher fi...
Sep 02, 2022•1 hr 23 min
Have we overused the smiley crying face emoji because was the text really that funny? Do emojis help us lie to each other and have they replaced the dot dot dot? Lisa's scale says she's amazing and Sam is giving herself a high five in the mirror. The ladies went grocery shopping and Sam was talking to herself again while Lisa got judgmental with the food. The mullet is making a comeback, should it? McRib vs Tim Hortons pizza who should not exist? Does being drunk excuse a picture of your penis s...
Aug 26, 2022•1 hr 21 min
Judgement abounds this episode as Lisa starts in on men who wear sockettes, murses, leggings and butt cracks! She claims its just an observation but is it really? When did planes start judging plus size people and why are those who fly so disorganised? Knock knock jokes, love them or hate them? Does cheese have the power to class things up and isn't hot chocolate a seasonal drink? Need some extra cash, hunt pythons. Is it possible for lotion to over lotion and is there a lesson to be learned fro...
Aug 19, 2022•1 hr 14 min
Was your Mom a ‘go to your room’ Mom? Did you have one of those 70's Moms that knew how to use her slipper effectively? Sam is talking to herself at the grocery store, again! Lisa had a fantastic black pant day and she may be getting curious about lettuce. Working for a car rental company may be the worst job ever! Would you want to drive the karma bus and what summer insect do you hate the most? Have you ever thought about hotel rooms and is owning a zester a sign of being an adult? Will Lisa e...
Aug 12, 2022•1 hr 23 min
Lisa is suggesting that they are in their tea years. Sam is feeling defensive about that statement and declares it to be ageist! Do you have the Blue Jay blues like Lisa? Would you prefer heat or humidity and how’s your weenus? Who knew a tik tok about McDonald's would get people all riled up! Can holding your pee make you pangry and is it possible to bond over a knit pic? Should you wear a sports bra to bed and did someone just give birth to George Jetson? Merry go rounds are boring or are you ...
Aug 05, 2022•1 hr 21 min
The Fake Fan (aka Sam) has been put on notice! According to Lisa the fake fan is a really really shitty fake fan. Lisa is not feeling supported and all she wants is a message with a cheerful hashtag! Sam will reread the job description and see what she can improve, maybe? Lisa reveals she is a quitter but thought maybe a dipsy doodle could set her right! Do you know that pigeons hold all the power and eventually ugly shoes grow on you? Is roller skating still a thing and where did the old style ...
Jul 29, 2022•1 hr 10 min
Lisa wants to be a team player at work so after declining yoga she says yes to a monthly book club. She doesn't read, wants Sam to read for her and report back. That would be a hard no from Sam. Lisa is so screwed! Can someone get too much sun and is over tanning a thing? If you can't call in sick can you call in stupid? How much is too much ice cream and will Lisa ever make a good cup of coffee? Are fish sticks made with the byproduct of what's left of a fish? Should the ladies sign up the HHG ...
Jul 22, 2022•1 hr 12 min
Lisa asks the question, can we potter? Will the hand eye coordination deter her or will she just get bored? Lisa would like to build a cup but needs it to be a quick version of pottering! What is the perfect breakfast and does it involve a hash brown patty? Did you have a nickname as a kid? Did your parents ever tell you a white lie just to shut you up? Who would sit at your dinner table if you could invite celebrities? Did you know Axl Rose can write a song in 5 minutes? Your job overpaid you, ...
Jul 15, 2022•1 hr 33 min
The ladies are days away from their lake vacation and the concern is will they survive? What will drive them crazy, will Sam pay attention to the KD lesson and will the three games at the lake be enough? Lisa is requesting kabobs be bought but will hotdogs do the trick? Does your body know when it's on vacation? Should pop tart bites be purchased and would you be okay with bats on your swimwear? Hotdogs are okay but could you eat 63? Is pickling like mummification and will the fakefan be doing a...
Jul 08, 2022•1 hr 13 min
Why has there never been a bonfire while at the lake? Is it because of the bugs, the heat or just plain laziness or could it be because Lisa would obsess over it because no one can answer, when's a fire done! Sam is back from her vacay and has words of wisdom from a 7yr old. Should there be a bill passed about mens favourite pastime? Lisa went cheap mascara shopping and her husband shares a hair revelation. Have you been streaked lately? Did you carry around a ghetto blaster in the 80's? How can...
Jul 01, 2022•1 hr 19 min
Do you start your day with a morning mantra? Lisa says 'who's a pretty girl' and it's really improving her mornings! Lisa feels food prepared by others helps us but hurts others. There are even rules to shopping for food prepared by others. What! What old person thing do you do? Would you buy buns in fours or underwear that captures your bodily fluids? Have you had your first Slurpee of the season and why are people dissing watermelons? Sam wants a properly stocked cooler on the beach and will n...
Jun 24, 2022•1 hr 27 min
Do muffins ever trump a donut? Are they the work of the devil because muffins hide their naughtiness? So much to unpack here! Lisa has conflicting thoughts about the Top Gun movie. Did you have an Easy Bake Oven as a kid? How would you feel about having one as an adult? Should we be stocking up on sriracha and are you carrying protection weight? Did you have a plastic pool or own goldfish as a kid? Don't play the game of giving someone the cold shoulder it never works out. Did you know there is ...
Jun 17, 2022•1 hr 24 min
The ladies are shipwrecked on an island, who is driving who nuts first? Will the chatterbox who doesn't sleep end up on the other side of the island, maybe. Sam was shamed by her humming dental hygienist. Did you just have a blunch? What do you get when you mix frozen grapes and jello? The Queen's Jubilee had Lisa emotional and wondering how she will cope when she's gone. What kind of spy would you be a liar or teller of tales? Should we be messing with the Big Mac and is a hammock really needed...
Jun 10, 2022•1 hr 31 min
If you were musically inclined would you busk for money? Lisa thinks her and her recorder could crank out a few bucks. Better yet let's throw in a triangle, tambourine and a cowbell for some added zest! What one word do you use when you want the conversation to stop? Sam has a fun 4-letter word that works like a charm. Is there a difference between gushy and mushy? The explanation is going to blow your mind! Bad pockets keeping you down, invest in a fanny pack! What do the Mona Lisa and cake hav...
Jun 03, 2022•1 hr 21 min
Lame ass phrases like 'best thing since sliced bread,' gets Lisa cauliflower mad! Has the bar been set to low, has Lisa offended those who think sliced bread is a big deal? Sam watched Master Chef Junior and wondered how come she only got to make canned soup at that age? With Ellen leaving daytime, who is taking over her time slot? There are new Lays potato chip flavours and the ladies are looking to try them all. Gracie Steckroat took Lisa and Sam down memory lane via Webster's time travelling ...
May 27, 2022•1 hr 32 min
