Welcome to The Heart of Dating Podcast Hey, it's Kate! I'm so glad you could join us this week as we try to entangle the ever-so ambiguous world of dating as a Christian. Over here on Heart of Dating, we get real as we answer some tough questions and uncover transformative ways to approach Christian dating. Oh, and you better believe we have some laughs along the way, because last time I checked, the struggle is hashtag real. You know what I'm saying? Now let's get to the heart of the matter.
What's up you guys? Welcome back to The Heart of Dating Podcast. I'm your host, Kate Warman. I am so thrilled because the next few weeks, we are entering into a series on a feminine and masculine. And to do this, I'm bringing in my friend Rachel Sherrill, who is also a feminine and masculine dating coach. Let me tell you a little bit more about what she does. Rachel Sherrill is a certified dating and relationship coach in the host of the True Feminine Podcast.
She coaches thousands of women and specializes in the concept of masculine versus feminine energy. Rachel primarily teaches women how to speak to men in a way that draws them in and inspires commitment. She believes there is an art to speaking to men that can be magical and magnetic and she loves teaching it. Guys, this is what we're getting into. And for the men listening, this series is also for you because we are going to go deep
also into masculine and helping men get back to their true masculine. Today's episode we're diving into the energetics of dating. What is energy? Is it actually biblical? Is masculine and feminine energy something that God created? The thing about it is you guys that actually there's so many things in this world that were meant for good that the enemy has hijacked. And I believe one of those things is masculine and feminine energy.
And specifically even the word energy. When we say that, we think of like new age spiritual stuff and we're like, ooh, he be G.B. That's not for us. We're Christians. But energy is science. It's an invisible nature, a force of nature that is present all the time in all things. Today on this episode, we talk about that. We talk about why it's science and we talk about how it biblically connects with God's beautiful creation. Energy was not
our idea. It was God's idea. Okay. And God also created us male and female. All right. So we're going to break that down in the episode today. And then in the coming weeks, we're going to dive deep on what is masculine? What is feminine? What is the dance and the balance of masculine and feminine in a dating relationship? I truly believe that this concept, this series, this is one of the most underutilized tools in the Christian culture.
And I believe if we can learn to master this and unlock our true feminine, unlock our true masculine, it will transform our dating lives. If you've ever been in a dating situation where things just ended suddenly and you couldn't figure out what happened because you thought you were connected to that person so well, often it can be drawn back to feminine and masculine energy because even the person on the opposite side, sometimes they can't
even explain it. But something energetically just doesn't feel right to them. And then they suddenly end it and you're left being like, what the heck? I thought we had a great connection. You guys, this is huge. And for my ladies, listening, man, ladies, we are just indoctrinated into a culture that teaches us to be masculine all day long. Well, specifically for the ladies, I want to let you know that Rachel has an incredible program called the
True Feminine Academy. If you want to check it out, you can go to bit.ly forward slash HD Fem. That's bit.ly forward slash HD Fem and you can find all about her true feminine Academy, which is incredible. We've had actually several girls and hearted dating go through this program. They've message me like Kate. Wow, my life has been transformed. She's maybe working on doing something for the guys. So guys stay tuned on that. But either way
in this series, we are addressing both the feminine and the masculine. So guys, this series is also for you. Okay, guys, I can't wait over the next few weeks. We're going to bring on Rachel for these episodes and it's going to be amazing. So without further ado, let's talk about the energetics of dating. Rachel, Cheryl, my girl, what's up? I'm so happy to have you today. Oh, thanks, Kate. I'm so stoked to be here. Thanks for having
me on. I have been so looking forward to this conversation today and the ones we're releasing in the coming weeks because we are talking about something and I was just texting you yesterday about this, but like nobody talks about this in the Christian world. And it has, oh, this is just coming to my head. I find that the enemy likes to make like these really good transformative tools that could be used. He likes to seep into and make it
like bad to work for the Christian world. So for example, like breathwork and meditation, well, all of that is actually good stuff that like even Jesus in the Bible, he meditated on the word day and night. It says that like breath is part of God breath life and twist. But those things have become intertwined with so many other ideals. So sometimes now Christians look at breathwork and meditation, they're like, oh my gosh, what is that? You know, like,
is it all this hbgb weird like only yogi that are extreme yogi kind of people? And I'm not against yoga personally. I know some people are, but the enemy likes to twist good things for evil. And I think that's what's happened with the topic we're going into today. Honestly,
and that's why I think it's not talked about enough. We're talking about today, the energetics of dating and in the following weeks, we'll talk about feminine energy and masculine energy and how they are beautifully can go with one another, especially in relationships. And so I would love for you to just introduce yourself to the people because I love you, girl, and I am so proud of the work you're doing. So will you tell us who you are and what
you do? Oh, well, I love that. Thanks, Kate. Yeah. So my name's Rachel, and I am the host of the podcast, the truth feminine. And actually just a backstory on how I even came up with that name was I just really believe that our world has taught us a false femininity. And, you know, just culturally and in a lot of ways, I mean, we have a lot of movements that have really swung the pendulum all the way over to the extreme side of feminism. And I'm
not against like a lot of the feminist movement. Like I'm definitely like I just don't want people to know like that's not what I'm coming. That's not what I'm saying because there's a lot of great things that have come from that. But when we go extreme and we swing all the way over, it actually has turned us feminine beings into our more masculine state on an energetic level. And that has drastically affected our ability to show up and receive
from the masculine. It is affecting the masculine and how the masculine shows up. And we have the balance that God designed very much out of whack. And we have women who are operating in their masculine and men who are operating in their feminine energy. And I say energy because, well, that's what we're talking about today. So I guess I'll break that down
first. I don't want to get to ahead of myself. But that's where I came up with the name the true feminine because it was it's just popped in my head and I thought no like the greatest thing that changed my life and caused me to show up. And I guess drop healthy meant into me was my ability to tap back into my true femininity and and and and not operate in the facade of femininity essentially. And so anyway, so that true feminine is to help
women return to their femininity on a very deep and embodied level. And out of that, they become magnetic to men. And even me saying this, it's amazing how you know, guys, ask me what do you do? You know, and I share what I do. And they're just like, wow, like that's it. That wow, yes, yes, whatever you're saying, yes. And so it's super potent, it's super powerful. And so is the masculine both energies are powerful. And we're going to be getting
into that in the next few episodes. But it's about learning and teaching each each of us, whether you're a guy or a girl, really had an ebb and flow between the two and how to rise up into your most either masculine state or your most feminine state. And so I'm really excited to talk about that today. So I am so excited. And I love what you're doing.
Because like I said, it isn't talked about enough. And it is a really good thing. It's transformed how I show up and dating outside of I think the two two of the biggest things that I've learned for myself and my healing journey have been the concepts of love attachment theory and learning my childhood woundings and how it impacts how I show up and love, which then helps me learn like, okay, when I'm triggered, this is what's going on for me personally.
And this comes from this core wounding. That's been a huge tool that's transformed the way I show up. And then the second thing is truly learning about feminine and masculine. And how to get back to my true feminine, as you would say. And it is, it's a concept that my therapist first brought up to me about probably somewhere around three years ago. And I was dating someone at that time. And I started practicing the things she was teaching
me. And I was like, oh my gosh, it blew my mind how it transformed our relationship. Just changing the way I would ask for things, changing the way I would share my needs, changing the way I would support him. And just the way I approach the relationship completely changed. And the things I actually wanted ended up happening versus the way I was doing it the other way, it was not working out. And I was more frustrated and I was making
him feel more discouraged. And so many things I was like, oh my gosh, this is, this is wild. And so I would be lying to say that I am a master at being always in my true feminine. But I am on this journey of learning more and more about it. And I am, I love it. And
I am so fascinated. Before we get into the conversation on the end of, at heredetics of dating, you also have an incredible program that I want people to know about because if they're interested after these conversations, I want them to follow you, your Instagram, you have a podcast. And then also your program, the true feminine academy, will you just tell them a little bit about it? Yeah, totally. Yeah. So the true feminine academy, I call it CFS. Sometimes that's just
my signature program. And it is, it is primarily for women. I am considering making something for the masculine. But I do not have that yet. So the guy is listening, love you. But one day I'll have something for you. But you know, this, my signature program, the true feminine academy, really is an all encompassing program where we work on the mindset, the embodiment, the energetics, and the communication. And as I always like to say, that communication
is a full body experience. And I kind of like saying that because I think that we forget a lot. It's like, oh, yeah, mindset. Yeah, yeah. I know mindset. Oh, talking. Yeah, yeah. I know talking. Okay. Hey, do you know anything about how you're showing up energetically? Oh, what's, what's energy? Oh, my gosh. Like you're going to talk about energy. Like, oh, pump the brakes. Like, I'm a Christian. Don't talk to me about energy. Like, it scares
people. And I'm like, but it is literally a part. It is surrounding us. It's all around us. It's how it's we actually talk about energy all the time. Yeah. And we refer to it all of the time. But if you want to talk about, you know, how it, how it functions inside of your body, people get a little hesitant and weird about by that. But my program really breaks that down. And it essentially, the goal is to help women return to their true femininity.
As I have said, and but really understand it because these concepts that you, even you and I are going to be talking about are really, really big concepts. And just listening to a podcast, you're gaining knowledge and you're gaining the ideas on the concepts and maybe some tools here and there, especially on my podcast, I give practical tools. But the embody network is just something that can't necessarily be taught through a one off, like some episodes,
right? That's like sitting with me and we're breaking things down. And I'm like, okay, how'd you say this? You should say that. Say that. Say that. And girls like, oh, my gosh, change your profile of this. And I'm getting all these quality men. And, you know, I'm finding, you know, and anyway, the idea is that they get to their dream outcome. And so many girls do. And then other girls may just find massive breaks through different areas
of their life by the end of the six weeks that work together. So that's the gist of it. But if you want more information, if you can come find me and I'll talk more. I love it. I love what you're doing. I love this program. It's phenomenal. And so let's get into the energetics of dating. We've already touched on the fact that it's something that when you say energy, a lot of Christians are like, what? Oh my gosh. Can't talk about
that. That's really weird. That's really strange. So is like what, what is energy? And is it woo, woo, or like, is it just science? Okay. Yeah. So energy. So this is basically what I always say to help break it down in a very practical way is, you know, I always say that all day long, humans, every single human is having energetic exchanges with one another. So whether we are showing up in a high
energy state, a low energy state, that, that we all comprehend, right? That's why we say, like, if you go to a football game or college basketball game, like people would describe that the room as electrifying or high energy. And this kind of clicked with me. I'm a very high energy human and people have always described me as rituals, really high energy. And I didn't think of thing of that when they said that. But when it came to other things, I used
to get like weirded out by talking about it. And I'm like, yeah, I'm totally a high energy person. Well, we describe humans as high energy. Some, but if somebody may not be a high energy person, we might use a different word. We may not say that person's low energy, right? But if you actually actually look at a person and how they're showing up with all the energy inside of them, there's, there is a whole language to the energetics and how they show up
inside of your body. And so, yeah, so you can go to a library and we would describe as I said, Hey, what's the energetic state of a library right now? They'd say, Oh, it's very low. It's low energy, right? And I mean, it's funny because in a slang way, we've all adopted the, Oh, good vibes, bad vibes, high vibes, low vibes. So again, something that we don't have an issue saying, but do you know that what we're saying for vibes,
we're saying vibrations. So we're actually saying that, Oh, those are bringing me low vibrations. Those are bringing me high vibrations. And our entire earth, and again, I'm not like, I'm not like a scientist, so please don't quote me on things, but I'm, I'm giving you serious just over here, like just, just little, like, little thoughts. But you know, our whole earth is the way that it works is it's things are functioning off of wavelengths,
sound waves, vibrations. I mean, the very fact that we can even do this zoom call radio waves, right? It's all vibrations. Something fascinating to me is that when a woman is pregnant and they go to do an ultrasound on a woman, I just found this out. I had no idea. Okay. That an ultrasound is not a camera. I literally thought they were putting a camera up there. It's mind blown. Okay. Not a camera. They're literally sticking. I know this is like getting
into something else, but it's important. It's sticking something up you and whatever the ones, whatever is the thing they're using, it is, it is giving off vibrations that form the picture that's happening inside of you. So again, I mean, everything that is happening in our world is it's vibrating. There's energetic things happening. So, you know, you know, as you're saying that I just want to add because I love the book and I know you love this
book too. The body keeps the score. It's such a great book. And in that, Dr. Bessel van
decol, he talks about like, and this is great. Like when you see, even if you see a silent movie, for example, if you watch a silent movie, you can tell even without words what's going on, most of the time, the status of a relationship by the body language, by even just like the energetics of just the body language, because our body also is keeping the score and shows like if we are really put off by something, we're going to have a put off energy.
We're going to be like maybe crossing our arm. If we're really uncomfortable, we'll probably be moving away. We're like looking away. We're not connected. When we're connected, when we're open, when we're positive, we're leaning in. We are smiling. There's more relaxation. You can tell, even without words on the screen, that there is something going
on. And it just relate. And the other thing I was thinking about too, the same way you go into a football stadium and it's like all this electric energy and all of that, you leave and you're like on a high. Whenever I do a podcast, I feel that same way. I'm like on a high because I'm like exuding all this adrenaline. But it's also the same way,
similar, but different. When I'm with somebody who is completely draining, who just sucks the life out of you, you can tell like after you leave their presence, you're like, I feel drained. And it's because the energy they're exuding is a low energy. It's a life sucking energy and you're picking up on it, you know? 100%. 100%. We feed off of each other's
energy in a room. If some party person walks in the room, you know that person who's the life of the party and they come in the room and all of a sudden they're laughing and they're energy and their spirits are rising, right? And so, and then same. If somebody walks in and they look sad and upset, it instantly changes in you. You're having an exchange with
that person. So energy is just like gravity. It is like oxygen. And none of us have any issues understanding gravity, accepting it as a law of the world, you know, a universal law and all of these things, you know, no one's going to go jump off the building because we know that gravity will probably kill us. Well, but do we see gravity? Heck no, nobody sees gravity, but we know it is there. Do we see oxygen? No, but we know it is there.
So do we see energy? No, but it is extremely felt. It is always being felt. And so, and so this is this is a huge reason why you can show up and try to say the right things or, you know, do things, but people can tell when you're overthinking something. That energy is literally being felt from the other person. I mean, like you just said, I mean, can
tell if you are relaxed or not. And if you are comfortable or if you're trying to prove something, there's a proving energy, there is a convincing energy that a lot of times we're showing up with. There's, oh my gosh, there's just so much to it. And I, you know, I just wanted to, um, to say that. Hey, guys, isn't this episode with Rachel amazing? I love talking about the energetics
of dating. It's blowing my mind. My goodness. Well, I wanted to hop in here and tell you if some of this is unlocking things for you and you want some more help specifically in how you're showing up in dating and healing some of your tendencies from the past. I want to recommend all of the coaching that we do is awesome, but I also encourage you to look at doing therapy therapy is a great compliment to coaching and they're in fact very different.
From therapy, we go backwards to really heal from things that are causing problems in our life today and to lead us to more freedom and coaching. We go over some of the past, but we mainly go forward. What is your vision forward? How do we get you to that vision? So if you've ever wanted to do therapy, if this episode is bringing stuff up for you and you were like, man, I need some help on this. I want to encourage you to check out
Faithful Counseling. We've been friends with Faithful Counseling, which is owned by Better Help for some time. And what I love about Faithful Counseling, it's a faith-based network of Christian counselors and it's all done virtually and it's more affordable than other therapy options. So you can do it from the comfort of your home and you can do it for more affordable than you can get in other Christian therapists. Guys, you can literally
fill out a forum and get connected to a therapist within 24 hours. You could message that therapist, you can do video chats, you can do phone calls, whatever you want to do and decide with that therapist, it's an incredible resource. We have so many hundreds of people within heart of dating using Faithful Counseling and I just could not scream it from the rooftops more. So you can go ahead and visit FaithfulCounseling.com slash Heart of Dating and you'll get
10% off your first month by going to that link through Heart of Dating. That's FaithfulCounseling.com forward slash Heart of Dating. Yes, so this obviously shows up and what we're talking about and we'll be talking about is how this shows up in the dynamics of relationships between a man and a woman and masculine energy versus feminine energy, which as Christians, we believe that God created man and woman, He created male and female in His image, right? He created
the male and female. It says that in Genesis. Awesome. So with that, He created us similarly, but also differently in the arc of it. We are different. We are man and we are woman. And so there are differences in our nature that are beautiful actually and I'd love to hear how the energetic state of the like a little bit about the energetic state between masculine nature, energy and feminine nature and energy. Okay. I love it. I love it. So we're so want to just mention that scientists have come
up with a lot of different laws of the universe that just makes sense, right? I mean, we talked about gravity, certain things. And one of these quote-unquote laws that they came up with was the law of balance is what they refer to it as, which is the masculine versus feminine. So law of balance. So what brings balance to our world and to everything is to have the two opposite things that come together and that fit well together. So anyways, because
if we were to operate just from our feminine, nothing would get done. And if we were to operate just from our masculine, there would be, it would be a little chaotic. Okay. So anyways, the difference between masculine and feminine energy, I'm going to give you guys just like a brief breakdown and kind of go into more of it in the other episodes. But let's talk about the masculine. Okay. So I'll just give you a little rundown. So the masculine, the
masculine energy is the action oriented energy. So it is going to be the forward leaning. So I'm leaning forward. I'm making things happen. This is a huge thing. I try to always tell girls, I'm like, are you trying to make something happen? So that's masculine. So the masculine is the fixer. The masculine is the doer. The masculine is the problem solver. They want to solve the problems. The masculine is the giver actually. And this one shocks
most people. It is the giving side of the two, the masculine and feminine. And why is the masculine the giver? Why would the masculine be the giving person? Well, the masculine is the giving is in the masculine category because giving is action oriented. It requires action to give. It also requires sacrifice to give. So this is something that's very backwards. Okay. Because if I asked a room full of women, hey, who do you think is more of the giver?
Do you think it's the woman or the man? Do you think it's the masculine and the feminine? And every single girl would raise their hand. Actually, every single person would raise their hand and probably say the feminine is the giving energy, right? So the reason that we oftentimes, well, we think that, but because the woman is the, is it has that
nurturing spirit, but the man is the giver. And I always actually tie the gospel in since you have a very Christian audience and I'm a Christian too, but you know, seeking about even what the Bible says, like we, it says that we love God because he first loved us. What is in the depiction is the masculine side and the people us were the feminine side.
We love God in response to him first loving us. So what happens is the girls are all initiating their trying to, you know, take charge or trying to make things happen, solve the problem and fix, you know, fix things and overthink, over drive, over analyze, over analyzing as our analytical is masculine, headspace, the way I describe it is headspace is the masculine zone, body space is the feminine. So heart space and body space is the feminine zone.
So I kind of go into feminine a little bit. So what was the feminine me? Well, the feminine is going to be pretty much the opposite of that, right? And by the way, I actually went to pause for a second. I usually in my courses will say to people after I describe the masculine, I actually ask all the girls, they say, does that, does that feel familiar to you? Does that feel like how all of you girls are? Do you guys really relate to that? And all
of them are like, that's me, that's me. I'm go, go, go, do, do, do try to prove and convince and try to analyze and bring an agenda just like in life in general. And here's the thing, you do have to show up in your masculine energy at work. So this is not about never being, oh, just I could completely fall back into the surrender of feminine. No, you have to
show up at work and being your masculine zone. What I'm teaching women to do is to shift out of your masculine, fall back into your feminine, which is, I'll go in, the receiver, it is the receiving side of things, the receiving end, the masculine gives the feminine receipts, the feminine response to what is given to her. She gives back in response to what is given
to her. She is soft. So it's a softer energy. So this doesn't mean, this doesn't mean that if you're a big bubbly girl and outgoing, I'm very outgoing bubbly and strong and stuff, it does not mean that you cannot, you lose that personality. It means that you shift and we have the ability to soften our entire bodies and none of us know how to do that or get there. And I will teach you if you want to come in my class, but just say, but anyways,
it's the softer side. It is open. So when I tell girls when you think of feminine energy, I want you to think of open. So I want you to think of your, you allow the feminine allows. And then I tell people, I'm like, the feminine is the gatekeeper. You allow what comes in and what does not. So are you a doormat? Absolutely not. You're actually, you hold all the power more than you realize because you are that gatekeeper, right? And vulnerability
is a huge, huge part, your ability to tap into how you feel. So oftentimes I say, how does your body feel? Not like your mind. Tell me how your body feels because your body is what feels things. It is reacting to the world around you. It's responding to the world around you. And then the feminine is, it receives. And I would love to just give you, give all of you this really profound, I don't know if analogies, the word we're about to for
at. I don't know picture. One of those. But even going back to the very beginning, I created a male and female. Okay, I like to tell people, I'm like, think, think about the very genitals of a man and a woman, the way that God designed our anatomy. Okay, this is kind of interesting. But the masculine anatomy and the masculine genitals, I mean, this, you know, go with me, we're not in a great now. So I guess I don't really have to giggle.
But anyways, even though now we're giggling, but the anatomy of a man, the way that he is, his whole, like his parts were designed when it comes to sexual intercourse, his whole makeup is the giving side of sexual intercourse. The feminine's body, her very genitals, are her lady parts are literally the design of them are to receive. So how much more is this going to play out energetically? Another thing I like to mention is, you know, you have
the sperm and the egg and, you know, who, who has the sperm? What side of nature holds the sperm? The masculine and their very body makeup. Who holds the egg? The feminine. Let's talk about this for a second. What does the sperm do? The sperm literally shoots off, right? I don't know how many, what are they say? Like a million of them or something? That's a ton of them. All take off. And what are the sperm doing? They're racing, they're moving
quickly. They are in action mode, full on action mode, and they're competing. They are competing to get to the egg. That's what they're doing. And the eggs just chill in there. The egg is doing nothing. The egg is floating down the tube at a slow pace, taking her sweet time. She is competing with nobody, nobody. Okay. And she's just waiting and she's going to receive this sperm that outdid all the other masculine little parts and made it
to her. So if you really want to break things down, I mean, this all plays out. Do you see what I'm saying? And so I tell people that the feminine side is the being side of nature. So mastering the art of being, and this is really, really hard for women because so many women are in proving mode. They are in convincing mode, which puts them in a competing mode. And then you show up with the masculine and you're competing. I literally tell girls,
don't even share any of your accolades. Let him unravel those. There is nothing you need to prove. Okay. And so you receive and just let him explore your divine, beautiful feminine being, your essence, your femininity is enough. The issue is, is that all women do is show up in prove mode and convince mode in their heads and their head space. And that is felt
from the masculine. And he ever pedals the masculine, actually put either pushes him away or pushes him into the feminine, which becomes that more passive zone. And here we are in the church talking about a lot of passivity within the male dynamic. And I'm like, well, it's really interesting because how much of some of that as you're bringing up, like, can also be because of how us women are repelling the true masculine
and men because we are becoming the masculine. And therefore, repelling the man's ability to be in his true masculine. And therefore, he's in the more passive zone, which, and then we are here complaining about it. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. I mean, this, you guys, this goes deep. We don't even have time for this. Okay. But I'll find you it. I mean, that is literally like, I'm like, oh, I'm like, oh, okay. I'm like, do you know what the problem is?
It's not your looks. It's not these things. It's none of it. Let me tell you what the thing is. You are masculine AF. Excuse my language. You know that for emphasis. Okay. So anyways, it doesn't matter. You can look like a Barbie doll. You can be the freaking super model. Okay. And you can be in your masculine. And here's the deal, ladies and gentlemen. It is perfectly fine. If you want to stay in your dominant zone with your man, by all means carry on. Okay.
But do not expect to attract a masculine man. You will either, you will attract a more passive man. And so that works. It's that's what you want. But if what you desire is your man to rise up into his most masculine state, it takes you to lean back energetically and allow create energetic space for him to come into. The issue is we're crowding up the energetic space in between the two of us. And then the guys like, cool, cool, cool, cool. There's nothing for me
to come into. We also block ourselves from them because we don't want to be vulnerable. So many times hilarious. I do so many Q&As and it cracks me up and I'm sure you feel the same. But it's like, so he asked me this, what should I say? And I'm like, say what you feel. Say exactly what you feel. Like you don't make something up. You just say what you're authentically feeling. So, um, and I want to really want to emphasize this vulnerability by the way.
Here's another one. Um, that is so lost in translation. Yeah. A lot of girls are, we'll say things like, oh, I, I, oh, I'm vulnerable. I'm definitely vulnerable. And then their, their form of vulnerability is they sat down with the man and dumped every trauma they had to share their whole past trauma lives. And I'm like, that's not being vulnerable. That is being, that's where in some ways, yeah, you know, it's, that's to be at your, with your therapist or your
girlfriend, you're not here looking for a man to be your therapist. You are looking for a man to be your lover. So there's a big difference. And if you want him to be your lover, you need to not show up like, Sarah pice me, be my dad, be my therapist. No, I'm sorry. You need to go find that elsewhere because the dynamic that you're looking for is romance. You're, you're looking for, um, a man to romance you and the man wants to romance you, but you just showed up. And he's like, I'm not
a therapist. I'm not ready for this. I barely know you. I have even, you know, whatever, whatever. So here's what, but here's what vulnerability really truly is from a feminine energy standpoint, is as simple as a guy saying, sending you a text, this is my most simple, uh, response because obviously I don't have time on podcast to get into every little thing, but a guy send it, guy sends you a text, he says, Hey, how's it going? Um, what do you want to? You say, Hey, it feels
so good to get a text from you. Um, I'm doing good. I've had an amazing day, a delicious latte. I really had such a nice time taking this wonderful walk. How's your day? So, um, you actually get descriptive and you actually share your day just a little bit, but most importantly, you let him know, it actually felt good getting a text from you. Why do we let him know that? Because that's the truth. If I were to ask a girl, did you feel good when you got a text from your man? Oh my gosh, yeah,
I did. Tell him that. Tell him that. Or how about this? Um, hey, I just want to let you know that, um, you know, for me, I, uh, when you said something the other day, I don't know, I don't have something else to help my head, but something that made you feel uncomfortable. When you said this, uh, the other day to me, I just want to let you know, um, it kind of made me feel a little bit unsafe. And I'm just curious to know a little bit more about what you were referring to on that.
So it's like, I'm going to let you know that something didn't make me feel good or didn't make me feel safe. Now be careful with this. For all this is not like all past to like, friggin, you know, tell him everything that's wrong with him because that will repel a man faster than anything in the world. A man desires to succeed with you. His pure mission in life is to be successful. If you can make a man feel successful, he will always come back for more. Now again, this is not
you saying, not you trying, okay? We don't want to go with the motive of I'm going to do this. So he likes me. No, just genuinely saying, thank you so much for tonight. You made me feel really valued and I just felt super comfortable with you. Um, I would definitely be open to seeing you again. That's it. Okay. He's like, wow, I really, I really scored tonight. I crushed it. I freaking accomplished this. This wasn't that hard. And he's like, awesome. Okay. It's now safe for me to come
closer and pursue this woman more. Mm hmm. So I mean, this goes so deep and I'm literally going off on a friggin tangent over here. Okay. I'm literally as you're talking, I'm trying to hold myself back because I have so much like a agreement in yes and a men. I'm going to share more examples in our future episodes of how this has also played out for me when I have truly embraced more of the feminine and when I've embraced more of the masculine and relationships, how that's played out.
But this is real. I can say like, and vouch for everything you're saying. I mean, you're completely you're accredited. All this stuff is wonderful. But like, I can vouch for this as well. Like it is, it makes a humongous difference in relationship when we recognize the energetics that are taking place when we are aware and we start being more proactive and conscious and intentional about how we are showing up versus, you know, if you are the one of those people that are saying it's just
not working out. I go on and date with this guy, these guys and I think it goes great and it's like I'm super connected and I feel wonderful and then I I don't hear anything from them again. Like there's something going on here like and it most likely has to do with the energetics. And so you guys, I Rachel, we are going to end this episode and go into our others you guys in the coming
weeks. We're going to talk about the masculine specifically. So what it is and how it shows up and how to really understand it in life and in dating and then and also women, how you may be showing up in your masculine guys, how you can really own the masculine and then also feminine. We'll talk about that as well and go in even more depth and give more examples. But Rachel, I love you girl. This is so good. I love these conversations. I love you too. I know you and I could just pop
off on this. I think it'd be on the soapbox, you know, because I'm like, there's a lot to talk about here. Anyways, so we have more coming. So this is we're just getting started. We're just getting started. You guys, I hope you stay tuned because this is going to be really good. And guys listening, we referenced feminine a lot. This is so important for you. It is so important for you as well to understand the feminine as well and the masculine. We're talking about both.
But like it is so important, I think, for both sides to understand both because it will transform how you're showing up and how you can best support the other person to show up in their true feminine or their true masculine, whatever side you are. And I think it's just really beautiful for us to understand it at a holistic perspective. So okay, Rachel, that's it for this episode. I will see you in the next one. The Heart of Dating Podcast is created by Kate
Warman. It is a part of the Converged Podcast Network. Our incredible editor is the one and only Scott Carro. Our theme music was developed by the amazing Christian Ladoo, special shout out to Andre Maga and Gabriella Asperro, who make the show possible each week and help to keep me safe. If this is your first time listening to the podcast or if you've never written us a review or ranked us on iTunes, we'd encourage you to do so because it helps us so much to get this podcast
into more people's ears. We launch our podcast each and every week on Wednesday. So we'll see you next week. This show is part of the Converged Podcast Network.