And he walked me to my door and then he like hugged for like fifteen seconds, and then he walked away, and I was like all giddy, like a fucking teenager, like like making weird sounds like okay, Like I was like, what the fuck is wrong with you? You're fucking not smooth at all, bitch, shut up. And I watched him walk away and he like has his hands behind his back, like you know, like like pensive, like walking like.
You know, like all like to the car. Yeah, like he's thinking deeply about what just happened. And I'm looking at him.
Yeah, fifty second time He's walking all slow like fucking Buddha. And I'm like, oh my god. And then I closed the door and I'm like, oh my god, Wow, that was so great. And then I realized my panties are fucking soaked and my pussy is pulsating, and I'm.
Like, did I just nut my pants? Like we don't even do shit.
M Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica and I'm Mila.
Happy December, Happy December, Lovely, how are you?
I'm great?
I am black, beautiful and juicy.
Hallelujah.
Black beautiful and juicy.
So I'm great. How are you?
I'm great, I'm black, beautiful and juicy, and I'm happy.
I love that for you. Thank you. I love that for you. You know what?
What was I watching?
Oh? You know what?
I was watching Scottie Beams podcast and she had this like clip that I loved actually.
And it was like, you know what.
You know, there was like three things that really or her that people do, and one of them is when people say I love that for you, because she's like, it's fucking disrespectful.
It's rude. I never really was a fan of that.
I mean, it can be rude though, because I remember the first time I heard it, one of our homegirls said it to me and I was like, are you shading me?
I think I know who it is? You think exactly who it is. She's a fellow Scorpio yep hm, because she started that ship.
Because that was where I first said it.
It's like, I guess that's good. I'm like, are you be bitch? I know what? I don't think? She mean?
She also so she hates when niggas come out the shower and their towels are around like underneath her armpits. Like if a nigga comes out the shower with his towel wrapped around his chest. The visual that I'm getting right now, he is the fucking towel twisted on his head, just complete the look.
Well, I don't know what.
That clip was. Great, that's the great a editing. It's a Scottie Beam. Well, what's the third one?
Ship?
The third one was?
Oh god, what was it? It was one? Luck? It was another good one to find the clip.
That was, okay, sorry, we're I was shuffling cards and they just fell out. We got the death and we got what the ten of Pinnacles?
Yeah, I think one was. One was Ba's reverse. I don't know. You picked both of them up like this whatever. Speaking of okay, what are some things that irk you?
Um?
Things that irk me?
And a man who name drops, Oh my god, irritates my soul?
Oh my god, I need too. That's so you know what I think.
I thought, I'm just programmed that way because we were in Hollywood and niggas do that all the fucking time.
Well, I know what it was. I know what the third one was. Was it a nigga who mumbles because I can't stand a nigga who mumble because I'm fucking deaf? So how dare you mumble?
Bitch?
Because I it's like you want me to fail.
No, no, it's just not confident. You want me to.
Admit my deafness. And also like, why are you whispering? Like you know, it's not sexy, it's not sexy.
Speak up.
So that's the third one, and that's actually one of mine as well.
I don't I hate niggas who have long nails and dirty nails. That really disgusted me, Like what the fuck do you have all those nails for it? And like you just doesn't look groomed. You're not groomed. Nobody us you know what.
I've also realized it irks me. And you're not gonna believe this because I was actually a proponent for not letting this trend die and I still think that women can pull this off. So I recently wanted on a hinge date and the guy rolled up, he did, I did, Yeah, I've been having a whole double life.
Do not tell me.
I'm like really like think racking my brain right now, like hinge date, hinge date.
What the hell bitch going on? Tom? Are you even my friend. Yeah, how many hinge dates have you been on behind my back? Two? Are you cheating on me? I'm one in Mexico City? And one okay I remember, okay, I remember Mesco City. Oh, then one here. I made him drive all the way to Calabasas.
You did not tell me about the one here, which is appalling.
In LA and we've been talking. He was a nice guy, he really was. He just wasn't my guy. I learned later that his like, actually I don't want to expose him, but his family's like really high up in like some sort of church group.
First of all, too late, his dad is like the head.
Of like the Seventh day Adventists, like some shiit like globally internationally. And I was like, this is very off brand for you, sir, And he's like, I'm not a Seventh day Adventist, but my family they grew up very religious. And I was like, I don't even want to unpack all this means in a relationship with you.
But more importantly, I'm upset.
That you're wearing skinny jeans anymore, said that you've chosen to wear these skinny jeans and these Gucci sneakers, that all niggas bought at one point in their life, like the preppy niggas that are not too stylish but just enough style and they want to dress designer and then buy those specific Yes, you know he wore that, and he wore some skinny jean.
What color were the jeans?
No socks on?
What kind of shirt? Like a color like a dark gray? And then the shirt.
He's it's just you know that I'm a slut for fashion niggas, Like if a.
Man can dress I I'm a slut for fashion. All my manners. You will style.
Fashion to above average stylish and the like I had a few in there that weren't okay. I'm honest, like like poetry slash scammer Bay he was not stolen teeth Bae, stolen teeth bay. He He tried, he tried his best. But I remember there's this one time he wore this like long white tunic.
I remember this, vagabe, do you remember? And I was like, whoa, well, what's happening?
Why?
I actually like that tunic? I just he it would think it was him him.
It was like it just looked weird, like he was going to church, like he was gonna go like lead a sermon or something. I don't know, but anyway, this this nice hinged date wore those skinny jeans and I was like, wow, I really don't like that.
Really you're a distractive I really don't like that.
And and then he proceeded to talk about his kid the whole day, which you know, I've been thinking like maybe I need to date more dads, Like maybe that's some of the disconnects sometimes for me, is like I need to date someone that understands, you know, my schedule, understands responsible a certain responsibility, maybe has more patience with kids so that they're patient with my kid. And then I sat down with his dad and all he did was talk about his fucking son the whole motherfuck.
How old is the sun? Ten?
What is there?
How much is here to talk about your ten year old? Like what like food? What his eating habits?
It was like literally like I was on a date with my like my homegirl, like my new mommy friend, with my new mommy friend.
Not even mommy friends do that she was telling me. He was telling me was food and these are things we'd already discussed. So I was like, why are we talking about this again?
I've never heard of this.
This is an interesting I heard women do this, but I've never heard of a man coming on a date. Maybe he thinks this is going to get him like in the like this is going to get him in because he seems like caring.
I don't know what it was, but it wasn't for me, and it was kind. I got a free dinner. That was great. I would have happily paid also, but.
I'm glad that I didn't have to where'd you guys go? We went to Crossroads? Oh? Oh, I did?
There's one out there? Hmm okay, and that's a pretty expensive vegan restaurant.
Yeah. It was good.
I really didn't have to do much. I just drove down the street and talked and talked and then left and then decided no thanks.
No thanks. I don't like seven.
I don't like seventy seven genes or overly religious family you think. Do you assume that men who come from religious family backgrounds have a lot to impact?
Yes? I do. I was gonna say I believe that it's not the case.
I believe there's always room for, you know, like something different to be laid out. But I do believe the chances are higher, and especially specifically in that practice, they're pretty extreme. So I was just like, this is not gonna work, like have you seen clips of my show? And then I'm glad he didn't even know. I didn't
even really talk about other podcasts. So hopefully he'll never listen to this and I won't have to apologize to someone else because someone actually also told me that I ran into recently on The Hinge, a former Hinger, which if you're listening, hey.
Said that I shared one.
Of his dating experiences and that he felt that I went on a date with him for content. No, you know the amount of content I got this first of all, look at me.
I am talking about you right now, however, and I do just look like you need to go on a date for content.
I respected his view. I respected his view, and I apologize. That's not my intention.
What did you say? What did you say about the date?
It wasn't about it was even about our date. It was about he shared a scary dating experience he had, and then I shared it on the show, and then he must have listened to it and felt like I went on a date with him for content to share his own content.
I don't know whatever.
And the point of the story is is you can't tell everybody. I have a podcast on Hin's going crazy on Hind right now, things are going crazy on Hind and.
Then you go over there just to see what's going on. He used to be so entertaining. It's like a game boy.
I'm really bad though, because I only check it every like nine days. And then somebody messaging me. This one guy, we finally like, I finally gave him my number, and then he called me and I could just tell. I was that this conversation is kind of boring, and then he was like, oh, my mom's calling, let me call you back, and then he hung up. And then I was like, I'm never going to answer again. And then he called and I never. I was like, no, you fucked up. You hung up on me for your mom.
So not nuts at all. Don't you know who comes first? Bit she met on a Hinge, I've already.
Established this isn't going to work. Now, already have mommy issues. She can call back. It's not an emergency.
She only called on Hinge Chronicles loading Erica is single again and now we're back onto the dating field, and the stories will unload. Unfortunately, Jamila is very much in love. However, thankfully her and her partner are just as wild as almost being single. So not it's almost being single, so you'll still get the stories. I yeah, you know, there was a whole heavy season of us just posting exposing niggas from him.
Exposed so many niggas on the Hinge and close friends.
It was not kind, but also it was kind of funny. And also it's public. It's public like uh property now, it's just like on Instagram, it's after you post that shit.
I could use it for anything.
It's wild, but it's the wild, wild West. And so therefore, I now you're on the shopping block because it's how.
I think I'm gonna we're gonna read.
I'm relaunching my Hinge chronicles on close Friends, so if you're not part of our close Friends, you're gonna miss out. So I want to encourage you to join Patreon right now. A because the Hinge chronicles are lit. B because next year we're going into seasons and you're only gonna get our off season episodes exclusively on Patreon. B because there's tons of other shit and we talk to you guys,
directly way more there. And number four because I cry a lot more publicly on Patreon than anywhere else on the internet, so if you want to see me cry.
We're just tired telling all our business. The niggas are tired of us talk exposing them for content. We're tired telling our business.
To everybody for free. You know it.
Just at some point six years in you got to put your foot down. Finally we're mature and we're like you guys, you can't know all of our fucking business.
You can for small prefer smaping.
We might be worse than like the only fans that we're giving everything, all of our inner pourings.
Well, I'm you know, I'm actually excited to.
Relive your dating life through you, even though you're not even telling me when you go on fucking dates with the neigas the skinny jeans, which is wild, but that's we're gonna say that for later. A little sneaky bitch. You know, if you guys have any scorpio friends, are they like a little bit sneaky? Yeah, like twenty five percent sneaky.
I actually feel like I'm like less of a sneaky scorpio than most scorpios.
That's probably true.
I think there's a lot more sneakiness happening in the scorpio department. I don't know how, because I'm very heavily scorpio. Maybe it's that like that one slither one sagittear, the sagt terrius in me. That's like, be free. I'm gonna tell everyone my business.
Well the word.
It's working for you, that one percent has worked for you, but thankfully it's worked for us.
Thank god you agreed and said yes to the said yes to the dress.
Shout out to the Sages. I know it's your season. I feel you. I've been starting to read my my sage horoscopes and I'm like starting to see like the other the parts, the other elements of me. And I just love sad I love sage women. They're so fiery, they're so fun, and they don't fuck with them.
Oh yeah, no, no, no, no, I can see that.
Yeah, Luna is going to be a little beast.
Yeah.
I mean I'm her mother, so I wouldn't really recommend that in general. Yeah, I don't think I give them and I don't really give off like I'm to be fucked with the vibes.
Yeah. Quite. Frankly, I don't.
I'm very friendly, but I don't think anyone's like, yeah, let me fuck with her and see what happened.
I don't think I give that.
Off ever since she climbed at me like a little fucking monkey Coachella. But she tried to beat my ass, and she the the speed in which she climbed up my body.
I was not ready. Don't try to.
I was like, she really might beat my ass here, don't you expose me?
It was like, shut the fuck up.
Next thing I knew, I was on the floor being straddled.
You hear that.
Person ninety eight pounds?
You hope don't ever try to attack me in public. It's not a good it's not a good look. It won't happen for you.
Oh my god.
We we're supposed to talk about this episode the things that we've learned this year.
This is a long episode.
Oh yeah, yeah, that's one thing you learned. Well, you guys.
I've said I said this on the Holiday Gift Guide, but I haven't really officially said it.
I've learned a lot of things. Do you know why?
Because I am now certified government certified sexologist, and Tanter practitioner as of the last speak of November que the Claps Orlando.
She was glasses, this was lingerie, she was leather.
She'd warned you, She did warn you, she said. The moment she becomes a Tantrica, she is gonna be wearing lingerie and leather and glasses. And here she is. She's a woman of her word.
Mela Map sexologists in. Hello, Hello, it's me. Do you have any questions? Dial them in.
Do you have any you need to have, any sexual roadblocks, any things that are holding you up in your relationship privately, personally publicly called your Meala Map, I have the answers for you.
No, But really, I really I learned a lot of things. I would like to say that I had learned not to procrastinate, but I have not conquered.
That yet, still in progress.
But I feel super I do feel like I've gained a lot of knowledge from my program, and I feel supercharged with sex smartness and advice and also just like a very clear understanding of I don't know, like my divinity. I feel very in tune with the you know, the divine source through Tantra and I don't know, I'm really excited for you to go on your tantra journey. And I kind of feel like I've been like I've been upgraded in my witchery, a tantra witch superpower activated activated.
Yeah. I love that. Yeah.
I also learned that we can do whatever the fuck we want, and we could probably plan it better.
Okay, Well it's possible, got it?
Yea, and we should probably not even though we can, probably shouldn't. That's probably one of my biggest lessons. You know, you just slowly, stead steady pasting.
What have I learned?
God, I've learned how important the company I keep is to my how I show up in all of my relationships. I realized compartmentalizing is not my superpower and it probably will never be.
And that's okay.
And that whatever environment, that whatever person or people I choose to keep in my space really have to be in alignment with where I'm at, doesn't We don't necessarily have to be on the same path, but that there is an specifically in my love space, it is so crucial that I am in alignment with my partner spiritually, that we have dedicated ourselves to some sort of practice.
I'm already dedicated to my practices, and I'm obviously always still like trying to make sure that I'm staying on the path of that, and you know, it goes in ebbs and flows. But I realized if a person that I'm with hasn't even really begun to do to be in that space and to understand the importance of spiritual growth and healing, that I can't have you in me or on me. And I think I always knew that, but I like felt like I could bring people on
the journey with me. And I've learned that like I don't really that's not where I'm at at this point in my life. That I would much more actually prefer someone to be farther along in their journey even than I am.
That I want to be led in that way.
And so I've realized that I realized that I have a very huge capacity for I realized like I have so much love to give, and I think that I didn't always feel that way. That I realized like I have a lot of empathy in the ways that I didn't think that I did or do. And that also that my boundaries, I'm not I need to never question.
My boundaries again. No, no, I that.
My boundaries are they're legit, they're good. Well, they need they need to be like cement. They can't be really malleable because then I can fuck their whole shit up.
Well, I think you know.
And I even had this conversation with you. I remember, like when I was crying at our friends was it Halloween party? Am like where was I at? Or I was just like a spice girls, Oh it was her birthday party at the party, and I was saying, how I feel like I've been really hard on people, and so I feel like I've needed to explore letting my boundaries come down more so that I can feel more empathetic towards people. And you were like, no, You're like, that's actually, don't do that.
I'm just gonna do it.
And I realized, yeah, you're right, and that generally, I think there's like a balance between being kind but also still having hard boundaries and saying, you know what, I don't relate to that, but I want what's best. I hope the best for you, and I'm going to gently stand over here, Whereas this year I really stood in it and I said I'm gonna go I'm gonna stand
in it. Fuck it, you know, and I needed that I needed to kind of just retract on all my retract on all of the work that I've done a bit to kind of like double check it almost Yeah.
Yeah.
So I think this year and I'm still processing this year honestly, Like it's not the end of the year yet, and a lot has happened for me, good, bad, great, medium, and I feel like I'm still in processing of all
of it. But ultimately I'm grateful for all of the things that I went through this year, all the memories, all the experiences, the love that I experienced, the heartbreak that I experienced, Like I really am grateful for being able to kind of be raw because I think at the beginning of this year, what I said was like I want this year to be my rawest year, Like I want to really feel like I'm like the most honest,
And I really went for it. I really explored all the parts that I like might have judged other people for and I just said, fuck it, and I realized it doesn't suit me, and it doesn't suit me because I don't know how to compartmentalize those things. Like I've realized, like I really have to be in a good frequency and energy or else it fucks up everything.
Well it doesn't. It doesn't suit you, but it really suits to no one. Like environmental pollution is real.
But some people and you shouldn't do this anyway, but some people are better at being able to, like be in toxic spaces and still having a positive output for other people. I can't do that. I can't be in a toxic situation and then be positive in other spaces. I becod. I start toxifying all of my spaces that way, I think, because so much of my love, so much of who I am is rooted in like I don't even know what the word like where it is, like like I don't know my heart centered and like womb
centered and like as women we are. But I feel like I just I know for me personally, like the moment I started entertaining any sort of bullshit, it's going to ultimately spread bullshit in all the other areas of my life.
Yeah, I mean, it definitely will. Unfortunately, the longer you stay in it too, like if you're unaware, it will numb you out, and so you start to think like this is normal, see, this is comfort, and then you just start to like vibrate there. And that's the thing is like being around tap people who are unwilling or you know, to look at themselves or heal or like even beginning to do that work, which is so fun. It's fucked up because a lot of men are not
there yet. Most men are not having spiritual practices. I'm not saying you know all, but a lot of them are not. You know, a lot of them are not going to be you know, inklings in front of the women because like this is kind of our territory and
we're kind of like reclaiming it. But the thing is, like so many women second guest guests, second guests themselves that they they become numb to to you know, how they do pollute spaces and how they do show up, and how their energy is low and like how their heart is hurting and like they're just functioning despite it and you know, pretending and it's just like that is really scary, and it's like it has been a tough year, but like thankful you are self aware enough to be like, huh,
you know, something feels off. You know, like I'm like at least being like, okay, well I realized I've not been myself in you know, X amount of time, and I can you know, I can directly related back to this and just like you know, take responsibility for participating in it, and then you know, actually moving forward doing something differently and having the discernment to be like I was tripping, but fool me once, You're not gonna, you know,
fill me four times. We've all been fooled multiple times. But just being having the commitment to yourself.
Yeah, I mean I think about as you're talking, I think about how men are on the internet, you see, and even women they're saying like I want a god fearing man, or like they must be God fearing or they must be Christian, And I kind of, yeah, I kind of relate to that, and not in the same way, like I want someone who's like spirit loving, someone.
Who's like devout, devout self devout, Yes, like.
Virtually have to have to believe in something.
Committed to spiritual advancement, committed to committed to just discovering your own divinity.
Discovering your own divinity but also knowing like that there's something bigger than us, and like committed to investigating what that is and how that impacts.
You, Right, and how you show up in the world because of that source that is like obviously you know, transmitted through you.
Absolutely absolutely, and that's a non negotiable for me. So my dating pool is getting extremely much smaller now.
But that's great, No, it is. But we don't have.
No skinny jeans like medium to high on the fashions tall.
Black, not medium to high on the fashion.
Medium okay black or brown at least brownish. And you know, you don't even have to be tall, like just taller than me, like I can wear heels and you're my height at least to like strong five nine ten. So I feel like I might be more clear now, specifically because I'm not having sex and I don't have any intentions on having sex. I really don't think I'm gonna
have sex until I'm in a relationship with somebody. Yeah, and which is kind of scary because I we probably need to have sex before we commit to the relationship because I don't want any funny business. However, I do think that like once you are in the like once you really tap in with someone, you know what they fuck like, you know, yeah, you know what they fuck?
Like have been wrong? Might not? Bitches are not tapped in. They're they're confused.
Now you know what they fuck like, but you don't know what that dick sizes, which check? Which will that will be checked? But I just don't have any interest. I can't even imagine a man inside of me. I have no like I'm very horn like I want.
Oh, I know I want.
I'm very horny. But I just can't imagine having sex with someone and then like looking at them and cuddling and like being excited like yeah, and like excite, like stupidly excited, like I don't know where this is going. That was like, no, I don't, I do care, and like I can't have casual ste and because I can't have casual sex, I can't lay with you and like be like that was.
Fun, that was cute.
Maybe hopefully you'll call me like no, I need to know you're gonna fucking call me like I don't want to do any of this in between grey area. Yeah, So it's very much it's very much better. It's very much better if like I'm dating with real clarity and intention and dating someone who's clearly on the same path, because if we're not on that same tip, then it's due it's doomed. It's gonna be doomed.
So you're gonna hear dating.
Stories on how much sex stories you're gonna hear, But maybe there's like other although I did tell you the other day that I've been like hanging out with this guy and like we haven't even like kissed, like barely touch, like there's clear sexual tension happening between us, but we've both kind of like well before this like silently acknowledged that this is like we're not going to like take
it there. And then I like actually vocalized to him like this is where I'm at and I respect where you're at, and blah blah blah, and then he walked me to my door. And after this was like after we like had dinner and we went on like up the mountain and overlooked the mountain like overlooked LA and had like smoked up.
There and it was really it was really cute.
And he walked me to my door and then we like hugged for like fifteen seconds and then he walked away, and I was like all giddy, like a fucking teenager like like making weird sounds like okay, Like I was like what the fuck is wrong with you? You're fucking not smooth at all.
Bitch, shut up.
And I watched him walk away and he like has his hands behind his back like you know, like like pensive, like walking.
Like you know, like all like to the car. Yeah, like he's thinking deeply about what just happened. And I'm looking at him.
Yeah, fifty second time He's walking all slow like fucking Buddha, and I'm like, oh my god. And then I closed the door and I'm like, oh my god, Wow, that was so great. And then I realized my panties.
Are fucking soaked and my pussy is pulsating, and I'm like, did I just nut my pants? Like we don't even do shit, We even.
Touched fifteen second hugs, Like I'm like, is this my new foreplay?
Is this the new shit for me? Like? Or is it because I haven't fucked in like two and a half months that like this is where I'm at. I was like, either I've just unlocked a new level of intimacy I didn't even know I could have, or a bitch is just so desperately horny that that's all it took.
Well, I think it's a combination of both, and you're probably gonna I think it's like the longer it goes, the easier it'll be to like honor it, because like after a certain amount of time, you're like, I'm not gonna just waste it. I've wasted all like I've committed all this time. So yeah, when you you're gonna be very sensitive to someone entering your like actually touching you.
So I think it's good.
And you are probably very highly on the high end of horny right now, but I think he'll balance its way out.
Oh I want to do They do this in tantra school where they do like the no touch orgasms, Well, well me learn about them. I feel like I'm open. I'm ready, like, put me in the session, baby out. I don't know if they discard everywhere no touch.
That's what it felt like.
I was like, that was like some weird that was like some tantric shit that just happened. Like he closed the door. I watched him walk away, and that turned me on, Like specifically the way he walked away turned me on.
And then I closed it in the way he walks. Yes, I don't know what it was. It was like he was floated away he floated.
Away, but I could tell he was in deep, like he was still super present in like what we had just experienced even as he was leaving me. You know, it wasn't like he was like okay and off my next blah blah blah, you know. And yeah, and then I just was like, oh my god, I think I met it in my pants and I didn't even.
Well, there's also something super sexy about a man being able to exercise a certain amount of discipline not too That is like super sexy. And like you're not even trying me, and you're not even being overly like we're so used to like you know, so like so easily. So like when a man is exercising but still showing interest and intimacy and investing time, it's like, oh, like you're not just fucking everything and you're spending time with me.
That is that is sexy, you know, so like I can see how that could be in like an aphrodisiac.
Yeah.
So I'm just I'm excited to just keep exploring that space and yeah, do a little sex magic on myself. Yeah, harnessing my own personal sexual power.
Absolutely.
I invite you to just continue to take note of how your body feels in the interim and like when you're around this person, just around people, especially just during hinge dating too. I think like people like don't pay enough attention to like literally, how does my body feel?
Oh?
So, actually my friend did this thing on me and I was super interested. It was super It was a crazy thing. So I'm going to ask you two questions, okay, and I want you to say yes to both of them.
Okay, okay, is your name Erica? Yes? How does that feel in your body? That yes? I muso say yes again? Just this thing? This feel? It is your name Greg? Yes? How does that feel in your body? Caucasian?
Do you feel the way your body reacts when you say yes to something that's not true and something yes that something is true?
Yeah?
I felt like, uh, like my chest got tight when you said yes to Greg. So these are just like super simple indications of how.
To pay attention to your when you're saying yes to shit, you don't really.
Yes yes one of the things you're saying, or if they align with your your body and like that's so fucking simple, but it's like wild, how if you really pay attention And like my friend asked me when we were leaving the airport in from graduation and something had come up. A lot of things have come up, that's
a whole different thing. But she did this to me, and it was so interesting, Like I felt like a release, like a tingly feeling, and like the back of my like almost like the back like my right lung or something. When I said yes. But when she asked me the other question I said yes, I felt nothing like I
almost like I I had checked out. But when my first response was to say, it felt normal to lie, to lie, So it was an indication to me that like I'm not, I wasn't aware that when I'm leaving my body to just like just okay, you know, like bypass my my inner my inner dialogue.
And then that I literally when I said the yes, it's.
Like a spark went off, Like it was. It was a strange observation and it's so simple. But like I think, as people, we're just so busy going through life, like this actual fucking body that we have that indicates this our intuition and tells us things we're so used to bypassing it that we forget to just like simply check in. It's true so as you get to go through this process, your your hinge and your rias and et cetera, you know, just be one being being attunement with.
That, thank you, I shall, I shall?
Do you have an affirmation? Move with mindfulness, Move with intention? What do we have today? What's in your spirit?
If we aren't spiritually aligned, get off my line.
If we aren't spiritually aligned, get off my line.
You hear that.
If we aren't spiritually aligned, get off my motherfucking line. Bye bye, Nigga bade ty ron, Go worship whatever the fuck you worship, video games, football.
Go where you worship.
Recently, when I came home from my graduation, my loveliest darling husband boyfriend made me an altar in the house, oh with like our book and some books and some money and some ancestor money and all these nice things candles and incense and I was and some food offerings and it was a success alter that he created for me. And I said, oh, my god, you're listening. You're paying attention in that is it? Really it warmed my heart. But mostly I was like, perfect, which ways are working?
He understands that, he understands the goals, you know, But like I completely agree and align with you and someone who's at least willing to recognize that, like being in attunement with source is super important and like just like us, you know, like we locked in and then we really utilize that entity, you know, our powers and we kind
of like see how it works and numbers. And so if you can like unlock that with sex and with your partner, like you can really create generational wealth and success and peace and happiness, like with your ancestors and with your your spirit guides in alignment with what you're doing.
And I think, I think that's what makes me excited about this journey because I know that if I commit to it in the way that I want with somebody who's who is spiritually aligned, the type of sex that we will be able to do and the type of magic that we will be able to create. And I know that because of what I've been able to create with you, like that being able to do that in in that way will be life Like will.
Save the world. We can't change the world.
I mean, essentially, I really do attribute our relationship to my understanding of like not like sex magic, but like co creation and just co creation with commitment with love with like blind faith, you know, like I really I attribute understanding my power and our collaborative power so much in like how I've chosen just like in a relationship, because it's true, like if we can do this, it's just like you finding your tribe, you know, like if
we can do this, we could do anything. And when you add sex to it, it can like really up the ante. And I do I do believe just like spiritually like man and woman yin and yang, like we are we we've obviously been put on this earth to
co create, like we maintain humanity. So it's just like when we really align with people who respect and honor and hold space and love us and are and like committed to the spiritual evolution, it's some magical ass shit happened, Like it's some magical tribal which you shit.
Yeah, So.
That's the kind of sex I want. So until I get that, or until I feel like I'm gonna get that, I'm cool. I'll just keep fucking myself because I fuck myself pretty good.
I'm gonna get a lot of that in tanger School, My love lots of tantric masturbation.
You know what I've been doing too lately.
The people that I'm attracted to, I take screenshots of them and I zoom into their eyes. I zoom into their eyes and I look at them when I'm coming, and it tells me if you're a fucking nigga or if you're safe. There's a few where I'm like, I should have known, because I've done it to a few people that I fucked, and I was like, I'm scared.
I'm scared, and I you're scared.
Yeah, So that's the kind of tip of one. I want to have sex with me now, Guys.
I'm not your screenshotting and zooming into their eyes. I need to see how close I show you in my phone. My friend's not crazy at all. No, totally normal. Nothing to see here, guys. I'm supposed to roll a joint.
Okay, let's roll it.
I brought my sash box.
Is so fucking cute.
It's the mom lunchbox. It's the four to twenty mom lunchbox.
I was in my car.
She saw mine.
She's like, is that a lunch box.
I was like, no, well, it's Mom's lunchbox.
You open it and.
All of my weed things, my weed and things, all weed and things, and then this little this discovery right.
Here that the tray is the game changer.
Now we have our our cannabis. Lill this out if you look at it. If you check out our holiday guide, our holiday wellness episode where basically we were treated at a beautiful house overlooking the eight one eight, then you'll know all about the sash box and how we use it.
But I have so many things, and there's gummies, like, there's many joints or should we just do this?
This is right?
Oh?
I already get moready here more to hear. You're here.
She got the weeds, she got the joints, she got the gummies. I'm gonna roll us something.
It's like a little weed treasure box. That's why I love it.
And it's smell proof, so you could, like you don't have to worry about your loud stinking up the whole fucking vehicle. I always worry about that before I go, like pick up Luna from like like a play date. She's been having like play dates with friends that I are, not my friends that I made her have, and so it's been I'm like, oh my god, I smell like weed?
Am I that? Mom? I'm that mom.
Speaking of moms, I'm really excited we are. We haven't told you.
Guys yet, but special announcement.
This is this big, special announcement to all the moms listening right now, right here, all the moms that have been wanting to come to one of our retreats. But you know, I get it. Going out of the country can feel overwhelming, it can feel you know, all the things you're leaving your kid. It's an investment. And so me and Mila have been talking for a while about how we can bring the good vibe retreat state side.
And guess what we are bringing stateside. We are having a Mother's Day retreat in Atlanta.
Hey, it's gonna super intimate.
It's going to be for the mamas, it's for creatives, it's for wellness, it's just, you know, it's really just I don't know, it's like everything I wish we had in brainstorming group.
It's a Brainstorming weekend.
So it's May tenth through the twelfth in Atlanta. So if you are an entrepreneur, if you're creative, if you just need a space to kind of just say your ideas out loud, because let's be honest, sometimes it can feel intimidating to share your ideas. Sometimes even your your closest friends don't get it.
They aren't your supporters.
If me and Mila listen to some of our friends about starting good Mom's bad Choices, we would not be here right now. So sometimes you actually need strangers to validate your crazy delusions. So at this retreat, we are going to be validating your crazy delusions. We're gonna have wellness sessions similar to what we do with the Goodbybe Retreat to be able to get a little taste of what we do in Costa Rica right here in Atlanta.
And we leave you, guys, We send you off back to being good moms on Mother's Day, so you'll have breakfast in the morning with us on Mother's Day, and then we release you to your children as good moms. So if you're local to Atlanta, you'll still be able to spend the day with your kid and you'll be a but a bitch, a much better mother because of it.
Come that good moms filleth your cup.
And there's very limited space at this retreat. We don't have a lot of We don't have a lot of space. This is not like our typical retreats where we have like you know, twenty five rooms. If you want to stay on property with us at our beautiful mansion in Atlanta, those spaces are super limited. And then we'll also open it up to just people that kind of want to
come in for day passes. But I really want to encourage you to come fully integrate into the experience and come stay with us at the house so that we can just keep the energy going and keep the energy flowing.
And it's going to be.
It's going to be.
I really can't wait to just.
Brainstorm and create with a bunch of strangers.
I know. If you're writing a book, this is the place to come. You're sitting with published office, if you want to start a.
Podcast site, if you want to start a podcast.
Honestly, any idea, anything that you want to create that you are feeling stuck or in between, or maybe you've already created it and you're still just trying to evolve the idea and just run it past other people and just have creative input and be in an artistic space to get inspired. This is the place. You don't need no passport. It's a very limited space. It's very intimate space, and I don't know what better way to bring in your mother's day than investing.
In yourself, spoiling yourself with ideas and also wellness because I'm going to get a massage. I don't know if you're going to get a message, but I will be getting massage.
I sure will. Massages make me more creative and.
I'm really excited too. I'm going to be doing a sound bath for you guys, so I've been tapping into my sound my sand healer bag.
We're gonna have some yoga, some morning yoga sessions, maybe do some tantric workshops. There's gonna be a lot of dope people in the building, so you really don't want to miss this.
Yeah, we're definitely going to lean on in on our Atlanta community and former guests to come.
Through with some knowledge.
So we haven't released who's actually going to be coming in and hosting a workshop, but that information will be coming soon. So make sure you hit the link in this episode description and reserve your spot now because these are going to sell out. I told you there's only a few, and it's more affordable than our Costa Rica retreat, so you definitely want to come feel the vibes, and then we'll see you in the jungle, because once you come and tap in Atlanta, you're gonna be like, all right,
I got to see these bitches in another country. So I'm really excited for that experience. Really putting a lot of TLC into that. I kind of like, put too much weed in here, But I mean, I don't know if you can put too much.
There's no such thing.
I love my friend Jared. He rolls the most beautiful joints. I'm always trying to like he knows how to do a cone without being like without a cone.
You know.
Yeah, papers are not my forte. I'm not gonna lie every time I try. It looks good, it burns terribly. Should I read the taros?
True? I think they're both upright. I think I picked him up like this. But we got the death card. Eh, that doesn't mean anything bad, no, but we rarely get the death card.
It's the most feared and misunderstood of all the cards in the tarot deck. Just mention the card's name and most people freak out word. They will suddenly keel over and die as soon as his card Appeals appears. Relax the death card can be one of the most positive cards in the deck after a period of pause and reflection with the hanged man. The death card symbolizes the end of a major phase or aspect of your life that you realize is no longer serving you, putting up
the possibility of something far more valuable and essential. You must close one door to open another. You need to put the pass behind you and part ways, ready to embrace new opportunities and possibilities. It may be difficult to let go of the past, but you will soon see its importance and the promise of renewal and transformation. If you resist these necessary endings, you may experience pain, both emotionally and physically. But if you exercise your imagination and
visualize a new possibility, you allow more constructive patterns to emerge. Similarly, death shows a time of significant transformation, change and transition. You need to transform yourself and clear away the old to bring in the new. Any change you should be welcomed as a positive, cleansing, transformational force in your life. It's the death and clearing away of the death and clearing away of limiting factors can open the door to
a broader, more satisfying experience of life. Hm hmm, Well, I think that speaks to us our activation.
This next realm.
Super powerful letting go old ship cocooning to butterfly coconing coconing. Mm hmm.
You also pulled this one too. It is this tend of pentacles.
I definitely feel the transformation. I think I see that so much in a lot in so many of the people in my life right now that this year has been one of like there's been a lot of push, like a lot of forcing the hand, you know, personally and privately. I think about even in our own business, like just us realizing like we've had to we've had to make some big changes this year, you know that were uncomfortable.
Yeah, realizations.
Fear around change because I think even like thinking about not putting out an episode every single week like we've done for so many years. Yeah, felt really scary. Has felt really scary, Like are we doing is just a disservice to our community?
Like what are they gonna lose our people? Are they gonna leave us?
Like, and it's like, no, we deserve to rest, we deserve to integrate the information, and they.
Deserve to have the best of us of us.
Yeah, and so that that I feel like is gonna be a big transformation for us next year. And even in our own friendship, there's been like there, this was probably like the hardest year of our friendship ever, you know, and like I had, like me, like us having to have uncomfortable conversations and actually us have to work on it, thankfully.
Like I think that we're so.
Attuned to one another that it could have been really deep, heavy work, and I think we're still in it, but like it's been a lot easier than I thought it was going to be. When I was thinking about the work that we needed to do on our friendship, it wasn't like I don't know what I thought, but like it was.
As hammering away.
I think maybe I related it to what I've had to do with men, which actually healing a friendship with a woman has been considerably a lot more enjoyable than.
It has with a man.
Well, I think about both parties have to be like willing and.
Just aware in order to do that.
And I think because I think it was so scary for us because we have so much on the line, and it's everything is so important to us, but it's also why it's really easy because everything is so important to us, and we've worked really hard, and we're all sensitive as fun sensitive fucking water sign ass bitches, and emotional and also deeply empathetic. We can read each other's minds and feel each other even if nobody really wanted to.
It's just we're so connected, you know. And there's been so many changes in our business and our love lives. And I think what we don't realize is like even in love, we're pulling up different versions of ourselves in relationships, and that affects our friendship because when we're both fucking running the streets wild, that brings out a certain aspect
we're in the same place. And then we get relationships, and then someone moves in, and then so you know, doing a long distance relationship, and like there's so many we're so connected that like all of those factors have
made us show up different. And I mean, I know, even for me, like it's been challenging just because I haven't been in a very serious relationship like this and like a very long time, and it's it's tested me, you know, and so and then and you know, I know, vice versa, and so it's just and then we published a fucking book. We published a book, which.
By the way, I get for a holiday season. It's a great gift to making bad choices. It's probably on discount on Amazon right now. You can probably get it right now if you just pause the episode and click it, and it'll probably be at your doorstep tomorrow.
It's a good little winter read. It's a good anytime read.
I mean, it's a good coffee. Look at how cute it looks right here, just right here. We're so cute on it. People are going to say, what's that and you be like, oh, you haven't heard of that.
And we really did pour like blood, sweat and tears into it. And yeah, it just so happens that this came out of the most difficult year of our friendship, when we had to do a lot of difficult things, and I feel like that contributed to it. You know too, It's just a lot of pressure to perform and to make it good and you know, prove ourselves as all setters in the world. But ultimately we're so guided and protected and what we're doing is just like for the
greater good. And I genuinely believe that you know, someone just left us a nasty comment before we started recording.
Saying that they'll be happy when we go to hell. It will be two lesson what do they call it, women, nigga women in the world, And you know that guy's crazy.
But you know this is all for the collective, you know, for our friendship, for our daughters, for just the women who just you know, I was watching a documentary with Orlando, and sometimes because I'm so empathetic, there's certain like documentaries about you know, the black American black experience that I I'd be like, I can't right now, you know, I know, but we just caught this documentary and it was just talking about, you know, some of the slaves, the Africans
that came to America and just how terribly we were treated as mothers. This woman hid in an attic for seven years so she wouldn't get raped. Can hear her children downstairs? They didn't know she was there, literally, and the only reason she got out because the white woman ended up buying her freedom.
But then she wrote about it, and that was you know, her children were down there.
She was being raped by this the master in the house, and because she was oh, she was like, this is the worst shit ever. So those children were the master's children with her, No, I think they were just her children. That wasn't clear. But she hid in an attict because she didn't run away. She just hid in the attic with like right rats and mice. They would give her plates at night. She could hear the children downstairs, but she just never came out because she never wanted to
go back to the big house. And then when she was done, after she got her freedom, years later, she wrote about it.
Seven years is wild.
But to keep from being raped, I mean, yeah, but it's just But it's just the fact that she created art around this experience, and the fact that you know, there was a time there were so many voices that had these experiences that weren't able to record them, didn't have the tools, could never tell their story. It is such a fucking we have with such a blessing to be able to show up in this space and just speak honestly. There is not a single soul who could
tell me anything. I don't give a shit about anybody's opinion because I get to tell my story in my voice, in my words. I get to create art, whether I say it, whether I write it down. It is my It is just such a rebellious act. And when you think of our history, that is not that far along that long ago that black women were literally able to create art, record their art, record their experiences, record their honest you know, just have control of their bodies, own
their sexuality. Like these are things that were like ripped away from us. So I just feel so blessed and thankful to just be able to do this with you. And I really do feel protected in what we do. And I feel like it's not just for us, and we're not you know, maybe we're not for everybody, but there's you know, it's for a bigger picture. And to get to use our voices and our love for one another and our love just in general. For women to say I'm going to say whatever I want and you're
going to listen. Goddamn is such a beautiful gift and the blessing. And I just know we're going to continue to thrive because our ancestors got our back and they struggled deeply, and you know, now it's our time.
I receive all of that. Thank you for that. Yeah, we kind sometimes you need a reminder, you know, I mean.
I don't take this privilege lightly of being able to also be like the friend in your head, like the friend in whoever's listening's head, who's like, I wasn't a good mom's bad choices because I fuck with Erica or I fuck with Jamila, or I fuck with both of them, or.
Whatever the fuck whatever brought you here.
Like, I don't take that lightly. I take that like that's a bit to have a platform as a black woman, a brown woman, be able to sit here every day and just share openly.
And occupy people's time and energy and openly. Yeah, without well, there's always there's still persecution in ways. There is, but it's not that it's it's vastly different, you know, because black women are persecuted for sharing their voice all the time. I mean even we are all the time.
There's we're penalized constantly, whether that's from a brand that doesn't want to fuck with us because we said something that doesn't it's too much, not kosher enough, you know
that white women have said a thousand times. You know, like there's still a there's still a shackling that happens even in this space, but we are vastly more, uh just We've been just given this opportunity and like what they always say, like you're living your ancestors' wildest dreams like we are, and even listening, we're whoever's listening to this right now, so are you. And it's like you have this, we have this duty. I feel like to
keep that moving forward. I was talking to my friend the other day about just like how important how seriously I take my karma and like my karmic like the cleanliness, and like how I feel like I've been very blessed in this in this lifetime and protected in this lifetime because whoever was before me did that, Like I feel that like they took it seriously as well, like this responsibility to do the right thing and be a good person in this life for the next person.
Yeah, you know, and.
Yeah, I think if more people thought that way, we would be probably.
Yeah. And I think that different decisions, And I think that's why we evolve.
It's because I think our commitment has always been just the commitment has always been like to liberate, you know, like I want you to think for yourself. I want you to step out of this box. This can you know this this rigid box of society and just like live I want you to experience, you know, bliss and peace and pleasure at the highest fucking potential. You know, And so many people are just you know, we are so enslaved by the systems that we create in our minds.
How we show up in the world is so so policed, and it's like, I just I want to invite everyone all the time to just be like what's real and honest to you though, you know, yeah, that like it is such a blessing to be able to to do that and also.
Remind people like life.
Is short and love it's just love, Like, let's not judge each other. Let's not waste time talking shit on the internet and typing out whatever evil shit you wanted to type out, Like, let's just live in our own lanes at our highest radiance, being exactly who the fuck we're supposed to be.
I believe that you need those people though too, a little bit.
But people talk shit.
Yeah, you need them a little bit. You need because if everything was love, you wouldn't even know what it meant felt like anymore.
You have to have the duality of it.
And like, those people matter too, that it's not they they are love as well.
They just are hurt. Yeah, you know, they haven't found ways to transmute it yet.
They remind me of that I am love.
Right right, that you've purified certain things.
Yeah, the karmak thing is very we must have done really well or our last lifetime because yeah, this this karmas karma game really pretty well.
Yeah. I'm trying to karmack the fuck out of my life. Yeah. Yeah, the comic life is so hard, but I feel that I'm like.
Be so comically clean.
Bitch. The other day, I was just like, I don't know what.
I was stressed out, like getting to you, and I was like, bitch, you woke up at ten you like you woke up at nine am, and like you smoked a joint. Now you're leisurely making your way through the valley at ten am to fucking shoot by a pool.
Like shut up.
I'm like, I've been working for twelve hours and it is hard work, but I just I'd rather be working with my best friend. I'd rather be working like spreading the good word of self expression, creating, creating, Yeah, creating.
I want to do it this way? Actually, can you do it this way? Let's do it that way.
Actually listen to me, do it this.
Way, you know, like and it did. It came out beautifully. That fucking holiday gift guide is beautiful. Go check out our holiday gift guide.
We're podcasting in the wild.
We're switching up our format. It's totally different. We're out of studio. We're getting the fuck out of the studio every now and then because we're good moms and because we're wild women, wild women, and we must be in the wild. That's where we really belong. You guys haven't even really tapped into like really our truest nature. You've just heard about it.
Yeah, you just kind of heard about it.
Now you can kind of come in and actually experience it with us, like when we are be part of the story that we're telling because you were there right right. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Podcasting in the Wild twenty twenty four.
Can't wait to see you there.
Well, got to go pick up our kids from school, so yeah, got to go do that. Yeah, you know, I hope everyone has a beautiful holiday. I know this time can be you know, sometimes cold and just weird for people, But just remember all this shit is fake. It's all made up, So that can inflate prices. You know, just be warm and cuddling and find some love. Don't don't let all the bullshit on TV get to you.
So specific. Don't let Chris Brown's Christmas holiday special. Don't let that.
Instagram girl use follows of holiday photos fuck you up. I felt and follow everyone that triggers you during the holidays.
I feel like, am I bad?
I always like we have some friends that always send it like a holiday card, and like I just all nine years of parenting, I've never I've never got a holiday card together. I could barely extend fucking happy Birthday text.
No, it's just not your style.
Do we need to get a holiday card with the kids, like as lesbian life, Well, we've had, We've had, We've had holiday posts.
It's the same thing, right, we did we had a holiday We've had like two holiday posts. We have Nisha that shout out to Nische for always making sure that the friends tribe it gets a holiday photo. So you have not in the you know, traditional hard copy way. You know, Okay, that's that's the thing of the past. I did that my first two years of parenting, and then third year I was like, who's paying for this.
How is this gonna invest for this?
And you guys are not even maybe twenty percent of your putting this on your fridge. The rest are throwing the shit away. Why am I doing this Instagram post? You're right, yeah, and that's what you just when you post it on Instagram and say this is my official fan of Car announcement.
We're gonna do it right here, all right, it's perfect, beautiful. We don't put any Christmas jargon of this year.
We should have put a tree.
God, are we moms or not? We're delayed.
I don't have a tree in my house though right now. Wow, I don't popped it up real quick. Last night.
It took about twenty minutes. I was like, Wow, that's it, okay, perfect. I don't.
I need to figure this out as I tell people not to participate in the holiday bullshit.
I need to get a tree.
I just I do like that. I got a fake tree, so it's fine. I don't feel like I'm doing anything to the environment. I've realized I've had this tree for nine years.
Wow, and it's still good. So it's not good for the environment, right if I get a real one.
No mine.
Look, listen, I've done really well. I've I haven't cut down a tree in nine years because well that's not true. My mom did give me a tree one time, but that I didn't buy it, so it wasn't me. They were gonna steal it. It wasn't me at night like just break in and Christmas tree.
Like at the thing. Yeah, I wond how many people do that. I mean, I feel like that, like I feel you could easily steal it. I mean, you gotta tie it up.
Maybe not, don't en courage you able to go start stealing Christmas trees. Bitch, you gotta you gotta switch the tags. You got to take the tag from a little tree and put it on a big tree and be like.
They're gonna know.
I gotta honor it because I already brought it to the front. Girl gave me this tree for one fifty. I know it says three hundred.
These trees are expensive. They're so expensive. Yeah, I know.
That's why I bought a tree, because it's an investment. It's a long term. This is a pagan holiday, It's true. But I do like the tree, the trees, but my house during that time not gonna lie. It has to be some kind of better search tree. Oh yeah, it is a mushroom tree. I'm having a mush a shrims. Miss yeah, Oh my god, when I haven't picked the date yet. Okay, it's gonna we have to do it.
Yeah, okay, so shrims.
We have to bite leaf or we have two.
We have one at my new house too.
I need to have one on the deck. And we need to have a groovy outdoor part two of the other outdoor party we had that was the.
Best fucking Christmas mushroom fucking random, fucking day of our lives.
It was so fucking good.
I just I'm just trying to.
Like relive it. I know, I know, I'm chasing it. I'm chasing this like leaf. We have to do this again, father father, father Leaf. Remember remember shoes, bitch, take your shoes off. Relax, Remember slut over kangles no floodover sloodover.
Well, we're just saying a bunch of random things and no one knows what we're talking about.
Then, you know, Yeah, that's a long time ago. All right, y'all.
Well, happy holidays. We love you, we do. I hope you rest, I hope you breathe and mm hmmmm you next week.
Bye, m
H m hmm.