Twenty twenty three. I feel like tried to like really take that, tried to test me on there, Try to test me there, try to test me there, like, bitch, you want to be a cold bitch, just be a cold bitch, okay? And I was like, you know what.
No fighting that coldness. I'm going to be a hugitch.
I don't want to be a cold bitch. I want to be a loving, soft bitch with cold boundaries.
The crazy part is it actually requires work, yeah, to not be a cold bitch.
We're back, bitches.
It's twenty twenty four.
Welcome back to season two of Good Mom's Bad Choices. Because you didn't know that. Our first season was three hundred episodes.
Welcome back, well, come back, welcome back, Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices.
I'm Erica and I'm Nila, and it is fucking January. We're like in it. It's like twenty it's twenty twenty four.
It's twenty twenty four. It is Life Path eight this year.
What the fuck does that mean? You keep up? There's so many path there's so many.
There's many things I don't it's only nine.
There's a life paths. There's astrology, there's a human design, there's the JQ whatever the fuck test?
Yeah that one.
There's so many tests. I've done them all. Oh, I can never remember that h JQQ.
I don't know what that one is either, but I have.
It's like the ones that make you take when you're like trying to be in big like yeah, important jobs.
Yeah, you know, I guess the point of the matter.
What is life path eight?
I have a look at that. Okay, what's your life? Do you know your life path number?
I found out, but I don't remember.
I'll tell you. Let me tell you how you do it. You add up the numbers on your birthday, but you don't use double digits, so if it becomes a double digit, you add them together. So you're ten twenty five nineteen eighty seven, so one plus zero is one, twenty five is seven. So that's eight and nine nine and ten nine and one is one because nineteen and then eighty seven is fifteen.
Already lost cow.
Seven? Wait, nineteen eighty seven, that's fifteen, that's six seven me forget.
I just as to look up one on the internet because he has to add it up. I'm about to have them add it up.
For me.
I think there's no calculator that does No, it's ten on one them.
Eight nine.
What I love when Mila tries to do math out loud in her head. This is always a different and math trust is me the fuck out?
Where's what you're talking so much to? Stressing and making me feel like.
I can't do We will sign like big loans And she's like twenty thousand plus twenty two point four seven times two point three point seven percent. Yeah, yeah, we can do it. I'm like, bitch, what are you talking about?
Because I have to write it down.
Okay, wait, I got it.
Eight nine.
Wait, your life path number equals one plus seven plus seven equals fifteen slash six.
What does this mean? Don't listen. Your life path number is one plus seven plus seven fifteen. Yeah, you're a six.
So it's what is this?
What is it?
Fifteen to? What's the six?
Your birth month is ten, so that's one. Like I said, your birthday is twenty five, that's the seven. Your birth year is nineteen eighty seven, which is twenty five, which five plus two is seven because there's no double digits, Okay, so four seven plus seven plus one is fourteen plus one is you're trussing everyone. I was listening to this right, five plus one is six. Okay all the witches now, except okay, this is called witch math. You called this
is which math. There are no double digits, there are no zeros. You just you get with what you got.
Okay, so my laugh moment. Okay, six, Okay. Your life path number is the number of I'm gonna put this link in this week's episode description so you can figure this out and not have to do all the math that you just had to hear it now. But your life path number is the number of responsibility and awareness. Those with life path number six tend to be the
healers of our society. Because of your loving, compassionate, and responsible nature, you are likely to find yourself following endeavors that involve helping those who are weak and less fortunate. Be wary, be wary and of wa be wary and of becoming overburdened by those seeking seeking and helping hand or shoulder to cry on, And mindful of not recognizing that the help and assistance you think you are providing to others can also be seen as too smothering and interfering.
Interesting, So this year is a year. This year is a number eight, and that means it's a number of creative creative numerology. Oh wait, no sorry, eight is the number of power, material and financial gain, achievement, reward, status, and satisfaction. The eight year vibration will provide the means the personal power with which to change the status quo and accomplish a significant goal that will alter the direction
and quality of your journey. So I've been hearing that a lot that this year is about reaping the benefits and the how do you say when you plant the seed, the.
Sow, plant the seed, plant, sow the seeds you reaped.
Reap the seeds you sow, reap the seeds you sow. Whatever funk the wait.
I did have? So if you're watching this on YouTube, we're actually we're sitting if you okay, So let's let's rewind our last episode of the year, which was really special. If you guys haven't checked it out, I want to encourage you to check it out, especially if you have been listening to the show since the beginning. And remember the days of me and Mela sitting at the dining room table with the elevator music when our kids interrupted and just those were like those were some like the
Dynasty days. And so we shot our last episode there right before twenty twenty four. And now we're sitting in my living room of my new crib, which we're not going to be recording a lot of episodes here. This is not going to be the new house of recording, but we could you never know, who knows, but we're sitting here and we're drinking thanks to Nelly. Shout out to Nelly and her Puerto Rican roots. Cheers, my dear cheers, Happy New Year, Happy happy.
New Year, and cheers to you. Cheers.
I've had about three of these already, which probably leads to why we're a little bit talking in circlear and doing weird math. Which math?
Which math?
So life path eight means abundance in creativity and finances.
Yes, m I like that.
I feel that. I feel that, Yes, we.
Have to do. And also you can use your life path number to see if you are compatible with your partner.
M hmm, so yeah, have you what's Orlando's life path number? But is it again?
Five? I just I just redid his math recently because he was like, it's here zero five or nine and I was like, it's not zero. Can it be zero?
No, that's kind of a fucked up like.
You said zero five or three? That's what you said, you did?
I remember, how's the How are the paths?
I think they're aligned, but you know, if it doesn't align, there overlign somewhere else like.
Astrology zone, another stogy zone.
There's always some way somewhere to you know, uh, dissect how you show up in the world, even though there's so many different factors. Right, Yeah, you're gonna give one more reading.
One more reading reading, Like the life path said, but what do the cards say?
Let me see my life? My number nine is hm, wait, you're just six? Yes?
What's in the cards for us this month? What are we going to be putting our energy towards this month? Cards? Mother s, ancestors?
Wait, are you ready? Six and nine? Of course that goes together.
You're gross.
The relationship compatibility of a number six with the number nine is one of the most positive and successful matches of all.
It's the baby.
Number nine is one of the those rare people who gain the respect of a number six. The six just falls for the way his every effort is recognized and appreciated by number nine. What interesting? But yes we are compatible. Honey, you fall for the nine. I'm one of the rare people that you fall for basically you don't like most people.
Oh my god, it's so true. Wow, look at that the cards be known, or the paths and the cards. Would you like to pick a card? My dear?
Sure, King of cups, King of cups.
So we'll be that at the end, Daro, time.
At the end. So I know it's a new year and everybody's always doing all those like big vast. I'm going to be a new bitch, New year, new bitch. And what are your goals for this ye or what are your hopes? What have you learned from last year that you're going to bring into this year.
I feel like the last part of this year was like a reminder to play, so I'm going to bring that into this year. I'm excited for our retreat. I'm excited to travel. I'm excited for our tours. I'm just excited to kind of just like float around and dance around in all of the like magicalness that we've created and just like be confident in.
What we've made.
And I think I'm really inviting in love. In this year, I'm always inviting love. I'm going to be inviting love forever and ever and ever, always in always, you know, bitches, and just keeping myself. It's not even inviting a specific person.
It's really for me a reminder of like making sure that I'm moving with love so that I can always attract that and that I'm not letting anything or anyone kind of get in the way of how I give my love, how I'm able to spread spread love to people that I that I love and not allow anything to I guess get in the way of how I do that. So just like being more loving is my goal in twenty twenty four, twenty twenty three, I feel like,
try to like really take that. Try to test me on there, Try to test me there, try to test me there, Like, bitch, you want to be a cold bitch, Just be a cold bitch, okay, And I was like, you know what.
No fighting that coldness. I'm going to be a huge I don't.
Want to be a cold bitch. I want to be a loving, soft bitch with cold boundaries.
The crazy part is it it actually requires work, yeah, to not be a cold bit And I think it's being it's being aware, because when shit happens to you inevitably, it makes you build walls and defense systems because you're like, you're not gonna get me twice, bitch. Or if I have less, if I have less love and empathy to bring to this space, then I'll if you disappointment disappoint me,
I'll hurt less later. But then it cuts you off from everything, like the playfulness, because you're constantly on a defense mode and you're constantly like, not only love you, you know. And I think that coldness can begin as a defense mechanism, but it can become permanent and then you don't know
how to turn it off. And I think especially for women, because we are such feelers, you know, we're such like naturally empathetic, and I think that's why a lot of women are cut off, because in order to navigate this world, you kind of have to be a little bit hard on the exterior so you don't get constantly fucked. You know,
that was aggressive, no grease, but it is. I'm also coming to the same realization or just about the reality of showing up cold or what that means or why that's my go to because and then like actively doing things to stay in the softness and like the how do you say it was compassion? You know, just to be more like Buddha because it is. It's hard, and
I think we don't talk about that enough. Yeah, how being hurt can ultimately make you a cold ass bitch, and no one really wants to be a cold ass bitch. But then one day you wake up and you're like, oh, no, I'm a cold ass bitch because too many motherfuckers were playing with me. But now you're just lonely and sad and cold to everyone because you can't navigate. You know who's a trust and who's not to and usually your
gut will do that anyway. But when we go against ourselves, we let people fuck with that and then become cold bitches. And then we're like, you know the angry woman, you know, the angry middle aged woman in the club who was like, how do you? And we never want that, you know, it would be just easy fun, you know, loving.
Well, I want to be able to. I want to I want to be in control of the energy in the room. And I feel like this best way that I can control that is I could do both. I could do one or the other. I could like be the bitch in the room, which I mean I can easily do that. That's really easy for me to do, and I can change the energy in the room in that way, or I can like be the love in the room and like changed my experience in the room
as well. And I had this thought the other day because my mom called me and she was like in a weird She was acting like she was just in a bitchy mood, and I was like, what is wrong with you?
Like why are you calling? Yeah, why are you calling?
And I know it wasn't really me, she was just like in it, and I was like and I was like, Okay, I'm gonna be patient because I I know I haven't done anything wrong and I'm not going to take this personally. And then I went to her house and I can still see like this energy on her, like she was like wanting to like be nice. She like, no, no, she wasn't wanting to be nice, Like she was wanting like she couldn't help herself, but to like have an
attitude and like change her energy. And all it took was for me to lay on her and she softened immediately and our whole experience.
Changed because you were.
The whole experience that we were going to have that night completely changed because I said, I'm going to take initiative of this, and I'm going to do that even though like I didn't really want to. It's not that I didn't want to. Of course I want to, like lay on my mom and love on her, but it wasn't like my instinct to do that. I knew that, like that's maybe what was going to help her, and it.
Will take she removing out of your own ego and pride to be like she's gonna this is unnecessary. You're getting my fucking nerves And now I'm annoyed, like be the conduit instead of being the malleable person.
Well, it's like I wasn't going to meet her at my frequency. I was going to help her meet me at mine, right, And I'm like, yeah, like, come to meet me up here, because then then both because up here, we're up here now, and now everything has shifted, and now our experience is going to be shifted, and we had a better night and I'm hopefully I think she
had a better evening after I left. But I just thought about, like how often I haven't done that and how I have met people at their frequency or even lower sometimes and I just don't want to do that next year, like because I spent a lot of twenty twenty three like like I don't know, like it was, I enjoyed it. I had a lot of we had
a lot of beautiful moments in our business. I had a lot of beautiful moments personally too, but it was overshadowed by like this other like frequency of like just like anger and anxiety, and I don't I just like I just know that I'm ready and I've already moved through this of like releasing that, and I've seen how much better it feels in this space and even though not every day is this day is like this at all, but I've also noticed too, like I've gotten back way
more into my meditation and like it's like working on meditation those two things for me, like I have to do them where I literally feel a shift in myself and in the meditation was so crazy. It was on Christmas morning, I went to the beach and I woke up I didn't have Iri, which is like I've I don't think i've maybe ever not had her on Christmas maybe like one time or something, and she was with her her dad and her brothers and sisters and stuff, and so I was like, I'm just gonna like really
take my time this morning. And I went to the beach and I like did this deep meditation and like it was crazy, like I felt all of like the feminine like energy and my grandmother's really it was like the presence of grandmothers around me, and they came to
me during my birthday and Joshua Tree as well. But like I had, I've been having a hard time connecting to that energy and like usually when I meditate, I'm able to kind of, I don't know, call them in, and so that meditation was a reminder of like they were like it almost felt like they were like my galactic team. My galactic team shout out to Mother God, Rip Mother God. I was like, oh my god. I literally when I was in meditation, I kind of giggled because I was like, my galactic team's here.
She's onto something, and she was she's not as fuck, but.
And it was like we're here, We're gonna We're here for you. We're gonna be here for you all year. We're gonna be here forever, but like, let's go, let's enter into this year again. We're here again for you because I met them at the beginning again of last year when I was going through a really deep transition in my relationship, and they ushered me into twenty twenty
three in a really powerful way. And then somewhere along the way, like I felt like I kind of like started detaching from my practice and myself in ways, which is why some of twenty twenty three feels like a blur. Like we had a lot of winds, but it was often overshadowed by like the turmoil of my own makings, you know. And I feel like I have a stronger foothold on how to like re establish that connection that
I have with them. And it's enjoy and it's in meditation, and it's in just like not taking everything so seriously. So I really want to bring that energy into twenty twenty four. I want to encourage people listening to to do that.
Like this shit is like like is to be.
To be enjoyed, it's to be playful, it's to to kind of prance around like a motherfucking fairy a little bit, especially if you've like figured some shit out, you know, And I'm in the point of my life where I have figured some shit out, like I've unlocked a lot of my powers, and there's more to unlock, but I'm and I'm very grateful for that. I'm grateful that I've been able to do that with you. I'm grateful that
I've been able to do that with myself. And it's like, Okay, well, this is what you asked for, So now are you going to play in here? Now are you gonna choose that, let's play in these in these things you've created and the energies that you've created and all these entities that you've that you've manifested, like come on, and like moving into my like moving too has been like a very big transformation for me. And like sitting in my in this house, like I wake up and I'm like, wow,
it is so I needed an energy shift. This was such a big important thing for me too, entering into this year. And I said that I called this in and I said I am moving by the end of twenty twenty three period, I wrote it down. Shout out to the shout out to Patreon, because I wrote that
shit in Patreon in a blog post. I was like, this is what's happening, bitches, and everyone was like, ash, yeah, that shit matters, and it did and it has and like I really didn't know how I was going to make it happen even when I wrote it, you know, and I just fucking trusted it and I did. And I'm like, okay, well come on, like, so what shoul gonna be mad about now? Bitch?
Right?
Literally that's what was my thought, Like when I woke up in my house my first day, I was like, but what are you gonna be mad about? Now? What's what's the new thing you're gonna be upset about?
Well, that's the thing. We'll find something if we're not conscious, if not aware, we will find something to be mad, like quite literally, yeah immediately, Yeah, yeah, it's true. It reminds me of Beatrice talking about her team, like all the ancestors and SI with her. And I think we kind of know this. We kind of have this idea because we think about like when you're little and there's a prayer and like, oh, you know, this person goes
to heaven. But like, I don't think we generally really realistically visualize our people supporting us and assuring us to wherever we need to go. And like, I think that's the difference. I think it's like once you know and you acknowledge them, and you're like, hey, let's go, I see you, I feel you.
You have to acknowledge them. Yeah, it's so important because how the fuck are they supposed to help you if you don't, if you're still acting like you ain't seen them, right, you don't know they're there, right.
And then you also it kind of gives you a level of accountability because, like you said, in the beginning of the year, you were in contact and then you've lost it, you know, on the pathway. But it's also like a point of accountability, like this is not just for me, you know, like all these doors have not opened for us just for the fuck of it, you know what I mean. It's like some real divine shit. But you have to respect the divinity of it all.
And by respecting the divinity, it's respecting yourself. Because all these people in our galectic teams are you know, a lot of relatives, people who have been close to us, people who have passed over, people who are just our guides or you know, spirits are just our guides, but ultimately they're there what's inside of you, like once you once you go inside, that's when you have access to
those things. And you know, even talking about all of the all of our powers that we have unlocked in this process, I thought, I think about that, you know, and people because I imagine where we were prior to starting this, and you see people like not that we're on TV, we're on YouTube. Yet it's like, you know, people are like I want to think. You know, all you gotta do is believe in yourself. You know, they accept the award and everyone's like, god, my mama, and
all everyone can do this. You said the believe yourself and you're like, shut the fuck up. Bit easy for you to say, you know. And I had to think about the moment, like what was the unlocking of the powers, And there are obviously lots of moments.
There was that time by the Christmas Tree. One of those moments was was the last win twenty twenty Winter.
Solstice, twenty twenty Winter Solstice.
We unlocked all the black people unlock their magical powers. O day. You know what I'm talking about. You know what the fuck I'm talking about.
But if you didn't unlock.
I don't know what to tell you, but do you even that day you know what I realized and what you said.
It just came to me. In all of the unlocking, every single mine is some of the painful unlockings, which are mostly lessons to the unlocking. The unlocking is always almost ninety nine point nine percent playful. It's almost always so fucking magical and so fun. You're like, this is not real. This is a movie. And I think that those type of those type of events can only happen when you're totally calm and chill and cool and safe.
And that's why a lot of them happened on vacation or on mushrooms and you're living room on Christmas to worry about the next day. But there is a level of like I don't know, like ha, you have to be in to even see the shit, you know, like, oh, there's my grandma, you know what I mean? Because like when we're constantly in this go go, go go go, or this like I'm not good enough, this is not good enough, I'm not making enough money, this like, it's harder to see those things. And it's like once you
get into the place where you can feel relaxed. Then you can see your galactic team and then you can unlock and get to this next point, you know, and get the house and manifest the thing. Because I think even for me too, like moving this year and like they're being quite it was an obstacle doing that. You know, you think you know what you need to do, and you're like, how am I going to achieve this goal?
But there is something so beautiful about coming home and being like I love it here, this is my house and I feel good in it, and everything is exactly as I designed it. And even that is a reminder that your galactic team is working with you. And it's like in every accomplishment, acknowledging them in its presence. That's how you achieve it, That's how you get there.
Yeah, no, it's true. You have to revere them and and you know, it feels different for everyone, like some people, for me, like it's an energy present. There are times like when I was in that meditation, I could see faces, I could feel literally like I could feel like the closeness. It literally felt like they were like hovered around me,
like looking over me. But I just think like as I'm as I'm reflecting on like the beginning of my year and the journey, and like the message really has been that all paths lead to you, and that you can avoid, you can distract, you can do all the things nurture, you can love, you can fuck, you can do all these things, but ultimately you gotta sit with yourself.
It's ultimately you can distract as much as you want, but you can and you can run as much as you want, and you can try to change even like when I'm when I was saying, like I woke up here and I was like I moved in here, and I was like, am I going to choose to have a problem with something else?
Now?
Like you know, and I it's my choice whether I do that. You know, it's nobody else's choice because outwardly everyone will be like, oh my god, she has she's got it, she's great, and it's like, yeah, it is, and I do and I and I do feel that way, and I have chosen that because there's always going to be something else. There's always going.
To be there's always gon to be an obstacle.
So it's gonna be an obstacle, you know, And I guess the reminder and like the lesson is to just to just trust where you're going and trust the process and just.
Be and just be committed to finding the magic and everything. You know, like, of course there's things that are ugly, and there are things that are painful, and there are things that are annoying, and there are things that you know, the kids don't listen and they don't pick up after themselves and people are fucking ungrateful and all those things,
But like where where's the sweet part? You know, like that is truly the only thing we have to do in life, is like stay alive and find where it's sweet, because this is this is all we got and it's so short.
It is true. It is about finding the magic and everything, even the fucked up shit, like really like trying to find the magic, even in like the darkest corners of whatever happened to you last year or whatever you're going through right now. The beauty of it all is that
there's always more. Like if you choose, if you choose to move on from something that you know doesn't serve you, you know you're at there's no penalty, there's no penalty, but there's there's you are guaranteed that there is going to be something else, you know, like and then you
get to decide if it's better, you know. And when I was thinking about like the path, and we kind of dove into this in our meditation at the beginning of this year of just like how like the journey of the path looks looks different all the way around, Like the seasons change, how you feel changes, what you see changes. But really it's a mindset of like how you how you choose to really transmute whatever it is
that you're experiencing. Like I could be driving through a winter cold I could be driving up a winter cold road it's snowing crazy, and I'd be like, what the fuck I hated here? I fucking hated here. Or I could be driving and be like, oh my god, it's so beautiful here, look at the snow. The seasons are changing, And it's really just a matter of like mind perspective and perspective.
Absol fucking lutely. It's literally like the is a glass half cup? I mean, is the glass half empty or half full? Type shit? Yeah, you know, it's literally the simplest thing is like removing the veil of like ugliness and be like, oh my God, I'm alive and breathing and I can move, huh, you know, and it changes everything.
Like even like if you're living and say you've lived in your hometown for years and years and you're like ready to get the fuck out, but you're not. You can't right now. It's like, so what are you gonna do.
You're gonna wake up every morning be fucking miserable that you live in this town, or you're gonna drive today and getting your car and appreciate some of the things that maybe like you didn't even think to appreciate that beautiful tree that always kind of tells you when fall is hitting, and it's like all these beautiful leaves are on the ground that you've never really appreciated. Like it's just as simple as that type of mind shift to
really change your perspective around even bigger topics. And I think sometimes we get so caught up and stuck in what we don't have and what we haven't achieved. And sometimes, you know, these New Year's markers can feel so overwhelmed because they're like a they're like a time stamp or like a like yeah, like a time stamp on a note to like everything that maybe you didn't check off your list in twenty twenty three, and I know we
like people talk about this every year. It's like, don't be so hard on yourself, but really don't really don't you know, and and just and see what happens when you don't, and probably you'll check more shit off your list when you just don't do that.
Well, you have to remind yourself that your worth is not tied to your productivity and that you are not perfect. None of us are perfect and that's okay, and you're gonna fuck up. And it's really about like picking yourself up gently every time instead of being like I'm the problem, nothing good happens for me, like I'm lazy, I'm this, I'm that, Like stop giving these forever titles to moments, you know, especially when you know better.
But if your worth is tied to your productivity, because there is a like I guess that is on a healthy concept, right and I don't know, like you know, people say that a lot, but just make sure if it is, like, at least make what you're doing. But whatever productivity means to you, that it's intentional and that like it doesn't have to be a crazy output to be productive doesn't necessarily mean to fucking kill yourself or.
Be on the laptop all day.
You know, it means to like do something that's nourishing to your soul, nourishing to your evolution, and that can feel really good, and that can be linked.
To your worth or even just like honoring yourself, like I'm tired today, say no, lay the fuck down, like that is a part of productivity. But I think the Western world makes us feel that everything is so go go go move, money, money, money, success and what success
looks like. But I think I think we forget that just by existing, just by being born, that we're worthy and supposed to be here and worthy of love and worthy of like peace and rest and like making those all equally as important and not just like this Western view of work work, work, work, work, you have to actually also be doing work on yourself, and work on yourself does require that you tend to yourself and your needs.
And that's in rest too, and in play and in you know, all the things that are not necessarily in the rule book. And I think that's just like another ode to good mom's bad choices is because who's to say, going to play for the weekend and not you know, saying playing hookie from work or whatever the fuck you need to do is bad. It's necessary, you know, sometimes you have to run away. Sometimes you have to get
the fuck away. You have to listen to you. That is that voice inside of yourself is important.
It is very important. And half the time, like you know, like people don't even We put so much pressure on ourselves and people are not even thinking about us, right we be like, oh my god, we're late.
They're gonna hate us.
Or this or that, or we didn't put the product, like no one even knew it was coming, bitch. No one knew the Instagram post was gonna drop, no one knew the email didn't go out. No one cared except you. And now you've literally aged yourself two point five years in three months because you've stressed yourself out for no fucking reason.
That's the thing. It's like, as you get older, you better listen to yourself.
And that's what I feel like. I feel like in this mid thirty range of age, I have to be really careful about my energy because that shit can age me, like literally it will make me look older. And I've seen it. I've seen myself and looked in the mirror and seen energetically. If I am like fucked up, I look older, and I've seen like myself look younger when I'm like lighter.
Well, let's think about it. Heavy energy is heavy energy. It's gonna bring your face down. Heavy energy gives you wrinkles, it's gonna bring all your skin down.
But like light energy, I've also been really beautiful when I'm sad depressed, Yeah, because I get like I haven't because I get skinny, notoriously if not. But it's a specific type of sadness in which requires where I don't eat. There's like the sadness of like, there's like sadness where I overeat bitches. You know, if you're listening right now, you know what the I'm talking about. You know, there's a sadness that makes you starve, you can't keep anything down,
you can't eat. Then there's the other sadness where you just want to eat ice cream and sit there. And they're two distinct different sadnesses. The one that where I don't eat, I actually do look better. You like that sadness, that's that's the sadness, that's good sadness that.
I but I'm pretty sure there's also you know, the the l happiness.
Yes, happiness is the more ideal one for everyone.
You're gonna be skinny, but you're gonna be a bitch everybody.
So yeah, so that's yeah, lonely, this is is that what I said. But I don't condone the things that's said, but yeah, I do. I feel like I have to be more intentional about how I move through stress. And I know that just because of like just diseases in my family, how I've seen them manifest and stress, like cancer, autoimmune diseases literally triggered by stress, and that shit runs deep in my family. Like I could be out here bald any second, bitch, I could really be out here
bald at any moment. Okay, we never know, Like if I start losing an eyebrow, just know the stress is hit and the autoimmune disease has creeped in. I mean it's the truth though, Like uh, stress, anger, resentment, that is the type of shit, jealousy that makes you physically ill. And y'all keep playing and it's really true, Like you don't want to be a bitch, It's gonna make you ugly, you know what? Maybe that's like the campaign, because nobody
wants to be ugly. Everybody's vain, so maybe they're like, oh, I'm kind, then I'll be guess what public service announcement. If you are a nice, kind person, you will look better. You will be a finer bitch, you'll be more youthful, you will be more fine, you will be more appealing.
I don't know if this works though.
If you're just being nice just to be more appealing, your skin will look tighter, you'll get six pack if you're nice.
If you find yourself genuinely just not wanting to be kind, feeling like a bitch and loving it, you're ready to dig deeper.
I've felt that way, but.
There's probably something.
There's something deeper, though, There's something like you're deeply sad or angry about some shit that you need to kind of address because there's no way you should be this happy being a bitch all the time. I don't know if it's a happy it's just more of a I don't give a fuck effects type of energy.
But I don't give a fuck. That I don't give a fuck is like it's so it's such an easy cop out. I don't give a fuck. I don't give a fuck, I don't care, I don't give a fuck how I feel, how I feel. And it's again the defense systems like loading up, loading up, like don't care, don't feel and it's just like you do care, you care about other people's feelings.
You no, In fact, I care too much, which is why I'm at a period. I'm on a pause of caring right now. So currently I don't give a fuck. But it's because I give too many fucks. So I've chosen to like not give a fuck for at least six months.
Well, you have to also be aware of who you're cutting off from the fucks given and who you're not, because there's a lot of people who genuinely love and care about you, and those are the fucks you should give.
Yeah, you know what I mean.
And so it's like you gotta be careful about how you don't give a fuck and with whom, because that is the compact. That's the thing. It's like, it's a cop up because it's easy. I can't just like fuck all that shit. You know, I'm gonna go where you agree with me. But the truth of the matter is showing up kind and choosing nonviolence is the high road, like Michelle Obama said, and you have to constantly be
working at it. And my goal and I hope for both of us that we become so deeply in our practice and deeply in our commitment to you know, world peace and compassion and love, that it comes second nature. And I think that's the goal right now. Second nature is to show up a bit from people. Someone pisses you off. I mean, for me, most definitely is But how do we transmute the energy of the world by shedding light and bringing people's frequencies up versus bringing it down.
I struggle with this because if you come with me with some violence, nine times out of ten, bitch, I'm gonna choose violence back at you times fourteen. It's true. Easily I'd be like, oh, perfect, you want to do this. I was happy, But oh you want to be a bitch, No problem, you know. But it's like, no, how do
you constantly choose the high road? Like you gotta like do that thing, like stop in some motion and be like I can respond right now, and I can be a bitch, or I can just touch I can just touch you and look in your eyes and say are you okay? And sometimes you do that to me sometimes like are you okay? And I like, fuck looking at me, I'm fine, fuck you.
I think it's also important to like the company you keep to. Also, it's important to if you want to be in that frequency, you also have to be intentional about the energy you have around you too, Like it's important that you surround yourself with you try at least to put yourself in environments that support that support that training that you're in right now, right you know what
I mean? Like you can't necessarily go hang out with the same person that like puts you in that space and try to like also get out of that space, you know, like you actually have to do.
We need a bitch safer like, like a bitch safer like if you feel like I'm being like we're being bitchy, you feel likes you know, are you having attitude?
This reminds me of Damon. Remember he told him and Rocky have those words?
What was it?
Tomatoes, avocado, avocado avocado?
Maybe you and your friends could benefit from having a safe word. So maybe it's not even like you beef with each other. You just feel like something's heavy or like even attitude about something, and so you're like, hey girl, bananas, like fuck, you.
Know my god, yes, bananas, bananas, yeah, bananas. Do you want to talk about it now?
Okay? Shifting shifting energy, but we're we're clear that there's bananas here, and we're gonna then once you acknowledge the banana. Sometimes that all that's all you need is to shift to be acknowledged. And that's kind of like goes back to like that moment with my mom and she just needed to feel cared for, acknowledged and you didn't even have to. Like maybe had you said it, you seem like that would have not been the route, but because you just instead.
I did say that, though, did so I did say that, and that wasn't working.
Okay, okay, I like, what's up with you?
I'm like, what is going on? I asked her twice and then I was like, okay, this is not working.
This is not been because you know why a lot of those times when you're in those spaces, I don't want to talk about it, but it's more than one thing. It's an energy that's cultivated. So when someone called you out, it's a you probably didn't want to really arrive there, but now you're here, Now you're stuck in it, you're committed to it, and now someone's asking, and then you realize whatever it is is so stupid that.
If you repeated it, but I repeated it, but if you still feel the way you feel, you don't like talking about it, and shut the fuck up. Let me be a bitch, right, Let me be a bitch and shut up. I don't know, Okay, let me just have my moment. That's how I am a lot in my life. So I resonated with that feeling, and I realized that that me asking wasn't helping, because that was all of
that probably too. She tried to explain it, and it was like I could see her getting overwhelmed trying to tell me why, and I was like, okay, so this is just a reminder to you to sometimes just see what you can do with your energy to shift, to shift your experience, because you know, that's really what it's about.
It's like creating beautiful experiences for yourself. It makes me think of our dear friend Lizzy Jeff, who always travels with roses, like she creates the experience that she wants everywhere She goes like create the experience that you want, create the environment that is going to best support whatever it is you're working on in twenty twenty four, you know, whether that's patience, peace, confidence, boundaries, whatever the fuck. You know, yeah, that's where I'm at with it.
Same same, same, same, And also just fear, you know, like just like shedding that shit too, because fear just
limits your living because you're just worried about failing. And it's like at some point everybody's gonna feel either way, you know, and even thinking about the last six years of this and like just doing it, you know, and like failing sometimes like doing shit wrong and doing saying the wrong shit, not uploading ship, but still doing it and not being afraid of failing because there was nothing really to fail because there was there was no I mean,
of course there's like there were super successful podcasts, but there was we were only it was only us in us and just the amount of diligence we had to show up with, and like, you know, just applying that same thing in every aspect of our life is just like just being fearless because fuck it, Okay, fuck it, ask the question, do the thing, like fuck it, fuck it, and I feel that this year, and you know, and I've found myself giving myself a lot of PEP talks
about like who the fuck I am? But just you know, just taking that into the next chapter and just understanding that we've done so much and so anything we choose to do, whether it fails or is whatever the fuck, it's necessary, you know.
And if you're pushing the energy forward no matter what, whether you fail or not, so inevitably it's going to hit somewhere somewhere along the way, you know, as long as you keep moving.
And he managed all being happy while doing Yeah, Yeah, because what the fuck is the point if not?
Yeah, I feel like we're all gonna end up dying and we're gonna be on our deathbed and be like, fuck, well, why did I spend so much time, like fucking worried about that shit? Why did I care so much?
The reality? Why didn't I you know, it's just, yeah, the reality is niggas die every day.
Yeah. I was thinking about my body recently. I was like, oh my god, Like we take our bodies for granted, like we don't take care of them now, and then we're like, we'll never know what our bodies could have actually like their truest potential could have been. Because we fucking beat it up for most of our lives. We actually don't know what our truest potential of our like physical sack of skin.
Is, right right, Like if we're a top notch I thinkbout that all the time. Like what if I just stop drinking and drinking out in the water every day like everybody says, or even just like this, I've been having, you know, like all those those Instagram advertisements about parasite cleanses.
Oh god, so now I'm talking about parasite cleanses because now I'm just do one.
Yeah, I rether, just take six papaia seeds.
Okay, maybe we'll do it, but then we'll report back.
But if we see parasites, I think we're gonna I'm gonna be traumatized.
I want to get those fucking out of me. I honestly, like, we need to get them out of our bodies.
I think if I see parasites come out of my fucking butt, I don't look. No, I have to look also them for you, and you look for me. That might be the end, Like that would might be the end of unhealthy, Jamila. If I see fucking parasites, if coming out of any orphice of my fucking body, I'm gonna be a fucking I'm gonna be a fucking bodybuilder. I'm gonna drink just water.
If you see parasites come out of your ass and nothing changes, you're disgusting. How you don't care about yourself? Oh, therefore that's what we have to do.
How do trigger warning for this? This is a lot that we're talking about right now. But everyone has parasite. Apparently everybody has them. We all do.
Of course, I'm gonna maybe we need a little parasite. No, no, maybe we need just a little parasite, like I don't know.
No, we need to eat. We need to eat papia seeds every day. This is the p s a papaya. But I will leave no bitch you, but we're eating papaya because you want the parasites out seeds also seeds, seeds. I'll eat all this shit. I don't like, I'm clearing all this shit out. I'll have a smoothie with papaya,
but not stray pa. Well, then somebody else told me something else I thought was interesting about in relation to the to the parasites that someone that went to like an Eastern doctor, and they were saying that they're like basically little demons, like they are entities. They're living sentient either beings. So they're inside of you and a lot of times.
Oh my god, there's like their own little universe. Yeah, in your body, there's another universe inside of me.
I'm girls, oh so, but you know, like in in Eastern medicine, like all of our organs, there's different points that relate specifically to other things. And so she was saying, like in her liver when they pressed there, it was rage, an unreleased rage, and then it was releasing to her goalbladder,
which was resentment, end up being resentment. And I was like, wow, like imagine just being so in tune that if you if you address these things that you have not addressed emotionally, you can find them in your body and like relate like it's correlated. You know, absolutely all of it is.
We're aliens, we're.
Computers, network systems, and we're the top programmer and we got to get with the programs.
So like, if you're that with that analogy, hit with that analogy, baby, if you're that bitch.
And you know you're that bitch. Then programming, bitch.
Program me, program me, program you, because you know we program tell the rest of the cells to get what the fucking program.
You're not afraid of shit, you're a winner. And that's it, Like that is the reprogramm that needs to happen. But first we eat the pious seeds to take out the virus up one. Oh my god, wow, that's this is very important information, I think. So they might mute us on the internet for saying this. Now we're gonna get targeted just for saying this. Fore, you eat ten to pious seeds, we get deleted. Well, also to remember what
we discovered back in the day. We've had some pretty good discoveries on good moms in the last six years. We also discovered because you know, this is a shit the man don't want you to know.
I want you to know this kind of stuff.
The pio seeds, if your man takes them, is also a natural birth control and then once he stops taking them, he can that in you and if you want to have a baby, you can. He can be on natural birth control. But the government doesn't want you to know the pio seeds, cure's everything.
Four If people get pregnant because of our fucking we.
Are not health doctors. This is wea at ninety nine point nine. This is only nine nine point nine percent active.
Your body will God will do whatever she wants. I know that.
That's why a bitch is on that. I you dizzy?
Are you speaking of sex? Do we have any horries? It's horry timing me?
Let it. It's joints, baby, thank you, honey stories.
I think we need a fresh joint like this little joint.
We don't know little joint bitches, little joints around here.
Where's my where's my pack?
Shut up?
Let me get my pack up. Hold on these little tidy gys. Little these are my favorite joints. I fucking love these joints. They comes like they're perfect. They're like the perfect joints for a little mini working moms and people.
Yeah, it's also for adults who you can't get too too high. I mean these kids are kind of hot. Yeah, they do just enough. This is a fact, because the bitch is high. Are we ready for? Are you ready for the horr?
Said? You have a horry for us?
I don't even I'm not really permitted to tell this horry. I was just at a dinner and the girl was telling us the hurry, and I was like, I'm about to use this the tea. So basically, the girl that I was at having drinks with with some friends and a cousin. She's a friend of a friend, she lives out here. She has a son, but she her job had suspended her for thirty days without pay.
What does she do to get suspended?
And ask all that listen all the story, so you know, mama got do what you gotta do. The son's tuition is due, She's like, fuck, what the fuck is up? So she calls one of her whole friends, and her whole friends tells her has a whole friend iBOT you if you need to. You need to get in the places, find out the news, find the money. So the girl basically tells her about this sight and I don't know the site. I gotta verify the site. I know y'all gonna be Colin asking about this site. I'm gonna find
out what it is. But you got to pay one fifty. So it's like a real host site. It's basically like you gotta invest invest in this hole.
Ship.
Yeah, so I thought of all the host sites I put myself.
On the way, I put myself on a feef okay, like sugar Daddy.
Sugar Daddy for me dot com. I just had a flashback of all the attempt at hotimes. That just is another one.
What was that other one?
You know, you know you're not a hope. Your attempts to be a host suck. This is me, nothing ever happened. I always never.
Met one one one of my not met one. No John for me.
So, okay, she invests one fifty and she decides she's gonna do it, and and on the East coast in DC. She's never been, so I'm not sure why she did that.
Probably doesn't know anybody.
I think the girl was there. Maybe the girl was, Yeah, that's that's that's where I would go to. So she only buys a one way ticket and a one night at a hotel. She signs up for the she signs up for the site or her little burner phone and gets on the flight. Okay, I think, oh, I think she uses someone else's pictures.
I forgot. We had to asked all these questions on the site, different pictures. Yeah, so she go why now, why would you do that? Because now this niggas gonna show up and you ain't gonna look like Maybe she did use pictures. I forgot, but she was saying that her friend uses somebody else.
This is, you know whose whose pictures? She uses? Mystika? Her friend who's mistika? Never mind, I know you know what the mistika sticker chik a la chikailana. Oh, anyway, that's she's a side note that. Okay.
So she flies I was telling secrets on the podcast on YouTube.
Come here because I know you know. Okay. So she flies into Baltimore. She has to take a train or take an uber or whatever from Baltimore to the hotel in DC. She's like, A good, that's a good.
Sorry, I got distracted back on the other detail, and I was like, actually, that's a that's a that's a good.
Two years.
Okay.
Other than the fact that it's probably not her, I would believe it.
I don't know, Okay, Sorry, I don't mind.
So she takes the uber from one city to next city. She gets to the she she gets two John's text her, and for some reason, she just goes with this one. She's on the way there he's like, oh, this is right around the corner from my house. I know that hotel. She shows up, she realizes the hotel is like a Boucci hotel. It's small. She's like, what the fuck I'm gonna getting I can't get john to here. Basically, she only gets it from one night. She goes up to
the room. The guys like, I'm in the parking lot. She's like, what the fuck? The girl who originally put her on the site isn't answering the phone hose. We all know they're not reliable, okay. Sole At this point she has her game face on. She's like, fuck it, I gotta get this money. I'm out here. So the
guy comes up. She's all talking, like looking for her clothes because she's got the shower, and he goes, you must have this is your first time doing this, and she's like fuck, Like he's on to me, and she's like yeah. He's like I can tell she's so. I guess she's doing a lot of talking and like, so he's like, how much if you just want to, like if I want to keep you know, if you want to just if I want to hang out with you for the week. So she's like, she just puts out
a number. I think she said like three grand. She should have went higher, but you know, she's just trying to cover her cross at this point. Make her you know, make the tuition and shit. So anyway, he ends up moving. He offers her to take her to another hotel. He ends up moving her. He's like, you could stay at my house and keep the money from the hotel, or I can put you in a hotel. And so she stays.
She goes to his house. It's really nice. He gives her, you know, he puts her up in the in the house. He stays for a week. He buys her dresses, takes sort of parties, museums, Like really kind, I found her prince charming. Now it's her boyfriend. What the hell?
When Haween goes right?
When Hawian goes right?
When Haween finds me your prince charming, you know, for years I thought.
This would be my story that I would I would somehow find prince charming, like working at a high end hotel or sugar Daddy's from me dot com for me in that way. I was like, wow, girl, this is a beautiful story. And she's showed me his picture is kind of cute. Wow, Instinctially she knew to go with.
That one and not the other guy, you know how, knowing also.
Hosy witches. You know why? Why do you think that is why? I think, Oh yeah, I think when you reach a level of disconnecting from the expectation of society of freedom, then you have to let you get access to those powers. I think there's a level of not giving a fuck about people's feelings, but not giving a fuck about how people receive you, whether it be like in your sexual essence or in just how bold you are and how much space you take up, whatever it
may be. Especially for women, I think when you've kind of start stop giving a fuck about that, that's another way to your secret powers.
Yeah, you just don't subscribe to the dogma and you're just like fuck it. Yeah.
So that's my host story for contribution. That woman did not give me permission to use that story. I'm going to try and find her dm or and tell her there's a lot of spots missing in this story, but basically that's the gist of it. She came out.
Well, if she's listening now, I want you to know I commend you that's the dope.
She's in love.
I love this story. Yeah, I love it.
It's a new pretty woman. Oh my god, it is age woman, new age pretty woman. Okay, it's a Tarot time. Tarot time.
Pull the Night of Cups, You, guys and cups. Shout out to Mahogany Taro.
Let's see what the stars are telling us. The Night of Cups is a classic romantic of the Tarot deck. He is in touch with his intuition and emotions, and he uses them masterfully to charm and attract others. He shows compassion and understanding towards others because he has learned to understand his own feelings and emotions. The Knight is kind, caring, and very in touch with his feminine side. He might be fine. He might be found writing a romantic poem
to his lover. Also fine, Yes, he's probably fine. Yeah, he clearly is fine.
Fine right here.
Creating. He may find him writing a romantic poem for his lover, creating art inspired by his innermost feelings, or approaching a vibrant sunset with a glass of champagne in his hand. His heart is wide open and he wears it on his sleeve. He shares his love freely with others, without constraint or worry. He is in love with love itself. When the Night of King appears in a tarror reading, you thrive on all things beautiful and are inspired by
many creative outlets available to you. While the Page of Cups was inspired by an imaginative idea, the Night of Cups is motivated by action. You have dreamed about what it is you want to create, and now are moving forward within this dream to make it a reality. It may be an art project or something you feel called to do based on your emotions, imagination, and intuition. Be
open to exploring your passions and your big ideas. You may find yourself drawn to a particular passion or hobby and now is the time to turn it into something.
Ooh and come to our Mother's Day Retreat in Atlanta. Sounds like you need to come and stop sleeping on yourself sis and come to our retreat. We're doing a Mother's Day weekend retreat at centered round creativity and wellness and tapping into your gifts and your arts through play, through pleasure.
Through creative expression.
Creative expression through real real shit though too like real actual tools on how to you know, take your little side hustle to the next level. So I'm really excited to connect with all the ladies in Atlanta at our little mini mansion because we don't got a little mini mansion for.
You house, that's a mansion mansion.
It's like, it's not even little. It's a mansion mansion, cam hanging makers, we got acres and shit akers.
I'm excited. I'm excited to go to Atlanta and like just be in a really intimate space and create together. Yeah.
Yeah, it's a different energy than our normal good vibratry, but like similar but more I don't know. Yeah, I'm excited. I'm excited to see who who who we attract to that that space. But I love you guys, be well, I love you. I love you And cheers, cheers. Do you need some do you have with someone in there? You little?
Yeah? To making all of our dreams come true this year and every year, and to getting you know, free and compassionate into the bag a gain lots of abundance, lots of abundance. He's good, so good, So you know where to find us. Good mom's underscore, bad choices, our good moms, bad Choices dot com. We have a lot in store for you this year, a lot of things on Patreon, so a lot of good guests, so be sure to leave a review and join Patreon for all that exclusive content.
And we love you, and.
Bye bye.
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