Is My Man Gay or Bi?

Yes me again.

And hey guys, it's Erica.

Welcome back. We're back here for friends of Advisory. Good Mom's bad Choices. How was your weekend?

I had a pretty good weekend, pretty exciting to say the least.

Yeah, I got it started ear least. I've made some bad.

Choices, definitely some things I could have went without doing. So last night, I on Saturday, I left, you know, my bad choices at home and sigging my ass in the house.

I feel you I made some semi bad choices last night. We're not gonna talk about this episode, not tonight anymore.

No, Today, I wanted to talk about five ways to know that your man is gay or by undercover gay, or cover gay, or by god.

This is a good topic.

This is a great topic because I wish I would have had these five signs because I have dated my share of undercovers.

Are you like? Are you undercover magnet? I think I am. I think I have like I think I have masculine energy.

Oh that's a good That's a definitely good perspective because I feel like I have masculine energy too, and maybe that's what people like somewhat attracts that or it could be like.

A come, come all, I'm open and accepting energy. So they think that you're like accept accepting. But if they felt that way, wouldn't they tell me. I think people are so.

Tainted by social standards that it's it's them that they can't admit it.

It's not necessarily the other person.

And I think also it depends like how you grew up, where you grew up, you know, if honestly it's it's a racial thing too, because white to a certain extent, I mean, to our a certain extent, there's some white guys that are totally out of cover too.

Yeah, but it's.

Really not accepted in the black community and coming a little bit more.

But if okay, even okay, that's a good topic because even when we read out for.

Our signs, it's gonna have applied more to black guys, because I know white guys that like do some pretty.

Interesting things that just get like swept under the rug. I guess, oh they're white, that's true. You know, me like slap each other's asses.

I have white friends who'd be like talk referring to each other's dick size, And I'm like, you, guys.

Well, I think that they're also just a little more comfortable because that type of shit doesn't fly in like the black or really the brown community.

They're like whoa, whoa, whoa whoa. White people get to basically murder.

I think because they've always, like black people, brown people, people of color have always had to be tough.

And so we're less likely to be vulnerable, yeah, or show vulnerability.

Yeah, So I think there's that. But anyway, so I did a little Google search.

I was like, you know, the little knows everything.

You know, back when I was dating my first I recover, I don't think that this article existed, and this article was really interesting because it's.

I don't know.

I was just like, I don't know, I don't know. I don't really agree with these these five reasons that they gave. I mean, I think our five reasons are a little better, but I'm just gonna read them off.

Okay, wait, where are they? I should have been more prepared, get your notes together.

Okay, here they are. Okay, So, how to tell if a man is gay? Five ways backed by science? Oh science, yes? So Number one is do his pupils dilate when he looks at you? And this is because apparently, when you are sexually excited by someone, your pupils dilate.

Everybody's looking ever heard this before? But okay, number two? Does he have a wide or short face? Okay, I don't know.

Number three, what does his individual facial features tell you?

What? Rot? I don't. I don't know what that means. Number four, does he walk with a sway? That might be true.

That's like the strongest point that for me at least. And then number five is he left handed? Or does his voice signal.

Anything to you? I don't.

I don't know where the left handed thing comes from. Maybe it's that like wrisk thing.

I don't. I don't really know, but I was reading you don't know because you're not a scientist. I guess I'm not a sciences science is to be trusted. I don't know.

I was like, you know, let me, let's create our own because I just wasn't sure I really agreed with these ones only because I'm basing these five. We're basing these five off personal experience. So if you guys out there have had any personal experience in this too, please email us. Let us know what your experience has been. If we're missing something, we can revisit.

This topic because this might be this might have to be a part too, because there's lots of things to be considered.

Yeah, so yeah, email us or you can DM us at Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices and let us know what you think. But so let's let's start with with number one. Number one is kind of uh, it doesn't necessarily.

Mean that you're by but he doesn't like to eat pussy. Yeah, that's definitely a sign that you don't like women. No, it's I mean it is, but it isn't.

Either you're below under twenty five or you don't like pussy that much. That's the only thing that like, that's the only thing that I can think of, or you're like super ignorant.

I I'm not with that. You don't tell them you don't like, I'm.

Not into sex with like any boundaries, And if you don't eat pussy, it's not gonna.

Work, is it.

Maybe they're just I mean, I know some men are just like have been traumatized and true true, So there's that. So they're not I don't mean gay men, I just mean genine men in general might have like fell upon a bad pussy one time one bad Apple and so they scared now. But I do have to say that in my personal experience with my two different relationships that ended up for sure being they were for sure bisexual or maybe even fully gay, there was no there was.

No never never, like maybe like a few times, but it was like forced.

And I was really young too, so like I feel like maybe even me that young, I was kind of like insecure.

About that too, Like I was like, maybe it's me, is there's something wrong with me down there? But it wasn't me. Twas not me. I think, yeah, that might be it.

But the one person that I dated that I suspect I had didn't have much of a problem with it, So I don't know, but that's definitely an alert.

Yeah. I just think that at a certain age, you should like to eat pussy. I mean shit, I like pussy to eat it like it's not that bad. Okay, you might not like it, but just do it. Yeah. I mean, do you think we like to suck dick all the time? I mean no, I mean sometimes maybe you do. Like if you like it, you're gonna do it.

If you like someone and you like sex, you are going to want to basically plase that person and explore that person in all.

In every capacity. And that's my opinion.

But I've also I'm at chicks that don't don't believe in sucking dick, which is also strange to me, but you know, I have to eat it song.

So so then if they don't and so that they don't, then does that mean that they're gay?

I mean no, no, I mean soule standard. Yeah, that's just one of our many signs. There are other signs.

If all of these signs add up, you might need to consult with us.

Yeah, okay, so number one and that was number one.

Number two I would.

Say, is uh, he just he never comes or he has a hard time getting there?

What about getting hard?

So, I mean on our last podcast, I talked about that that's like an epidemic going around.

I don't even know if that's because of your gay No, you know what it's not.

Because I asked my gay cousin and he has actually had sex.

With the girls.

And I'm like, if if you prefer me in, how do you perform? Like how does it even cause?

For men?

Like you can't deny if you're attracted to something because you're jump cast at work?

And he said, oh no, it's a whole that's warm. Yeah, except a warm and moist we like those.

Yeah.

Basically, he said he can't. It doesn't matter. He can't. He can't. He keeps saying, Oh no, baby, don't get it twisted. I can perform. It's it's the quote. Hmm.

But coming I would feel like I didn't ask him about that. We're gonna have to. We're gonna have to. We're definitely gonna have to go back on that conversation and report back.

But yeah, So I recently had a situation with a guy that.

I would never would have thought like off the bat, I didn't think like he was gay or by. But now that I'm single, like I feel like because I've been in a relationship for so long before that I was, I would I would attract like bisexual men or gay men, And now that I'm single again, like it's happening again.

It's happening to me again.

And I don't know for sure, but like he just never he never he never could get there and would go just keep going and going andgoing.

And I was like, look, I'm tired, I'm tired, she's tired. We need to wrap this up. But yeah, I just I don't know, just like.

In both well, now a third situation. This has been like an ongoing thing. It's like and I realized that some guy just lasts longer, you know, true.

So yeah, I don't know if I've experienced that per se. Oh and there's the there's also are your number four?

Number of number four? Yet we're only on number two girls, Oh, we're on number two. Okay, maybe what I was going to say is going to be number three. What was the number three? Oh?

Yeah, so number three is always asking if he can put it in the butt. Yep, that's what I was gonna say.

The butt. There's a lot of attention spent on the booty. Yeah, when there's like over it's you know, freaky's cool. But yeah, there's there's an extent.

Also, my aunt told me this was her advice because years ago she suspected the guy she was dating.

Maybe she said, you gotta do the finger test. We put the finger in the butt and see if they owent on and see they're down.

Yeah, but then I kind of feel like that's biased because you know, like that are just morea actually open my guys mostly, But yeah, because you know, like technically back to our scientific reference, you know, that's what the men's g spot is is in the booty. And the first time I read that, I was probably like in high school and I read in a GQ magazine and

Like what's a long time? Like now, like an hour with your friend? Though, I would be like stop, okay, enough of that, moving on.

No, Okay, Well that's a that's a sure that's a sure sign that something is something.

Yeah, that's that's kind of a signed. Like if you, like, when you have a vagina available, why would you want to keep putting it in your booty? I mean, I guess it's it's tighter, but there's also so many risks.

It's a risky I mean, look, I'm not opposed to, you know, exploring other sexual areas of.

Your body different holes, right, but I'm just saying, like if you already suspect and then this is also going.

On, right probably we are not we are not bashing anyone's sexual preferences.

Or you know, I have no room to bash anyone's sexual anything.

We really don't.

But like you know, like for me, like I I'm I've I've explored, I've more exploring. I was actually thinking I wanted to take like go to like a sex workshop.

Oh that'd be fun, or like like a karma.

Workshop of some sort of tantricks for sure, tantric, something tantric, because I yeah, we.

Should go and talk about it. We should.

But personally for me though I never that's with me in my past three possibly three experiences, there was no booty action. There wasn't a lot of booty. Yah, there was no booty action. So that that's why I think I was a bit confused because had I know, how had he even doing that, or maybe I would have had a better idea of be like, oh, okay.

Definitely want to eat the booty for an hour, right.

Right, or just in general, like having any suspicions and thoughts of feeling uncomfortable with you hanging out with a particular friend, like women have an insane amount of intuition. And if you those thoughts or seeds are being planted.

Anywhere in your head at any time, I mean likely you ain't your mind. Ain't I a into you? You know? No, that's for sure.

Also, I'm kind of like a bitch in this sense where it sounds terrible.

Maybe I'd like to like push guys limits, see.

Like how fi you gonna let me go? Which is probably like wrong, So turn these dudes guys.

First of all, I am vagina, so I can't turn anybody ship, but I am I guess I don't know if it's like the masculine energy in myself that it's like, what.

Are you gonna let me do? But yeah, I'm also like super open and I like girls, I like I like people, but I'm also open and honest about it. So yeah, I don't like.

I don't think being in this being secretive and in denial is cool. First of all, I think you'll be stuck in your life if you don't admit to yourself like who you are and what you are, because you won't be able move forward in any other aspect because you're gonna be unhappy because you're.

Not your pretending.

So yeah, so the one, the guy that I dated, it's almost like he likes the secret, like it brings It's like he's kind of.

Creepy though, but like, oh the creepy one.

Yeah, he kind of likes the mystery of him. So like the secret isn't holding him back, you know what I mean? Like I know, for sure not ninety nine percent of the time it does. But for him, I think he likes the mystery because he like he genuinely.

Just likes attention and the intrigue. Yeah, he likes men to be intrigued by him and women.

I had a guy like that that I dated briefly, and I agree, Like he wasn't denying or accepting it.

I never straightforward asked.

I mean, we've talked about a lot of things openly, which I really respected and appreciated the openness because there are so many people in denial.

But I agree. I think that he totally enjoyed the intrigue and the mystery and the attention from men and women, and the fact that people.

Couldn't put their finger on it. So he wasn't trying to be one thing or another. He was just himself, which I can respect. I like people who are themselves. I mean, whether it's off, out of the off the wall or out of the box. I'm into people make themselves. But I mean, I guess that could be a thing too. Motherfucker's like attention.

Yeah for him it was that. But then girl, they're just so much. I was so young when I dated him.

I was seventeen and he was older than me, so I was like easily impressed by him. He had a little like change, so he could like, you know, a zen stuff.

But now looking back, I'm just like, you are so fucking.

Dumb, Like just call you me. Yeah you're yeah, I know what I'm like. Oh, but you know what that brings me to added one. I honestly do think now that I think of it, another guy I dated who I now I look back, I'm like, you are probably in the closet.

I think guys like.

That intentionally target young girls because they're gonna be less experienced and less likely to be able to put their finger on it that early.

Because this guy I dated, literally someone knocked on my door. No Linda would tell us, Okay, okay, do you know you can you you're gonna intentionally gravitate towards someone who has less experienced because you know, you can get away with shit. Because that guy I met him and I was.

Like in high school and he knew how old it was, and he was well over thirty. And now that we're still friends, even though I yeah.

Whatever, I just I can see it more clearly now.

But that makes sense that you dated that guy's so young, so he thought he could like, you know, put the wool over your eyes. And that the other guy I feel the same way about is also.

Dated me when I was extremely young and didn't know any better. Yeah, like we like we would.

We used to like have sex in the dark, like like I never had sex in with the light on ever, like And now I'm thinking, like, is it because he was kind of like not into my body right right, like the boobs, Like he didn't want to see any of that figure a body.

He just wanted that wormhole, give me that wormhole. Oh my god. That and then on top of it, he also.

The reason why I know for sure that he is bisexual is because of my two best gay friends. They he tried to get with both of them in different ways, like the.

Weird one, the weird guy. Yeah, so like my one of my best friends.

I'm not gonna say his name, but you can figure it out if you go on my Instagram or maybe not.

I don't really post my lot.

He he used to live in Chicago and my ex had went out to Chicago. I feel weird even calling him my ex, Like, please refer to that weird guy, weird guy, creep, miss WG, the mysterious one he went. He was in Chicago and had hit him up like outside, like I had no idea he had hit him up, and we had we were no longer together, like maybe broken up like eight months or so, because yeah, it was our sophomore year of college. And uh, he went out to Chicago and hit up my friend and was like, hey,

He's young too. He's like, damn wants to go to a spare. Yeah, let's go to this spot.

I never been in those Like yeah, so he's like yeah, but he called me after her was like, dude, like we went to the spa and then like we like we're wearing rogues and it was just weird. He's like, I don't He's like, I'm just telling you this because I don't want you to think like I was trying to get with your man. He's like, but I was just trying to enjoy a free spot, right, And it was just got really weird.

And then my other friends was it like a bathhouse spy kind of yeah, yeah, Like.

So what like I was like, what, straight man, it's going to take my game A friend who my game.

A spa? This doesn't make any sense.

No, So second second story is my other friend saying good he had a few experiences with him and like being at dinners because like my ex just kind of like knows everybody and so like you just was in the same circle as my friend and they were sending at dinner together and he kept rubbing his legs.

Under the table and this is what he told you. You weren't there.

I was not there to the point where like he felt really uncomfortable and he was like stop and then stopped.

And then then my ex was like, don't tell anyone. No, they don't tell anyone, is the it gets worse? No, then so I don't. I can't reveal too much about like what he does for a living, but like I mean being in an industry like the artist.

He's an entertainment Yeah, and so and so was my friend and so like they that's how he would entice him.

You'd be like, let me help you, like like I think he can.

And so one time he was like like, come, come to buy the hotel and like we can work on blah blah.

Blah at the hotels. But he's like, my friend is here, like we can all work together.

Okay, So he's like Erica, I went and he was like trying to push for me and the other guy to have to hook up and make out or do whatever we wanted and him watch at the hotel.

What was he saying?

Like he was just like, yeah, you guys should you guys should kiss, so you guys should like.

Yeah, he definite knew he was dating a child because any other.

Woman would be like what is going on?

So wait, how long after did he tell you my friend or yeah, your friend tell you after this happened.

So he told me about the the the hand the leg rub, like immediately, the hotel thing. I think he was like low key embarrassed about it. Yeah, and he didn't tell me for like maybe a month.

He was like he did. He was like, I don't. I didn't want to tell you. I felt really like embarrassed.

Like yeah, he's like I felt embarrassed and I went that I like fell for it, right, And I was like, that's what he does.

He's very manipulative.

Yeah, people like that who have like secret lives can I think have developed manipulations. But yeah, like if you want to watch two gay guys make out, Yeah, it's.

More than just being open sexually. No, that's way born, right. Yeah, I mean I can't I can't imagine.

I know we're gonna piss some people off with this because I know some people are just like very sexually fluid, and I understand.

I'm sexually fluid. No, we're not pissing anybody off. But only people are going to piss off. It's people who are in the closet. The one thing we are is sexually fluid. The one thing we're not is obviously or not in nobody's closet because we're a yeah, we ain't lying. It's the truth. And if you feel some other ways, because you might need to come out of that closet and come to yourself. Brother.

Okay, so our next number four on our list or almost done. Our next one is being overly homophobic. Yeah, that's a big one. That's a huge one.

I mean obviously, like you said again, I mean I hate to make this racial, but this is America.

This is America, and.

A lot of black men or brown guys are Yeah, we've been conditioned like we're not with that ship. So yeah, to some points people are like, no, I'm not with that. But there's one thing about like you could not really want to go to the gay club and need to, but there's something about, like I dated this guy, the one I dated young and he constantly till this day makes like randomly like but you know, I'm not into that ship. I'm not into that gay ship. I'm like, my nigga, we're talking about noodles.

No, homo, you know that's right there?

That like that that that that phrase in general always throws me off with guys because like I'd be like nobody was even thinking about you just said that, and now I'm looking at you like, why are you so sensitive?

I'm not into that gay shit? Or it's almost or like I'm gonna be around all these gay people.

It's almost like and he's also in the industry, And it's like, first of all, if you're in any industry in Hollywood, there's some weird gay shit going down, period. There's no denying it. So you should almost be immune to it or like not at least not offended by it. And it's just a constant comment brought up. And I'm like, what about it makes you so uncomfortable?

Because clearly you don't have to watch, you don't have to go, you don't have to see, you don't have to participate, right, Like why are you so mad?

Are you mad?

Is there something within yourself that you're angry with? Are you mad that you might have some sort of feeling?

I mean, like we said, this is like a more serious of a topic, and this, you know, this happens like more often than we'd like to admit, you know, but sometimes people have had like childhood trauma that you know results in certain sexual feelings. I mean that's period childhood trauma results in all types of feelings as adults. But you know, definitely that equates to sexually, so something to like if someone's overly overtly homophobic, Yeah, it's.

Definitely a sign. Yeah, no, I agree. I think.

The two situations I were I was in, they weren't overly homophobic. But I've met people that I've been like for example, actually the last situation that I was talking about, the one that possibly is throwing me some red flags, he was very like like like we were just talking about like the movie Moonlight, and I was like, have you seen it?

He's I see that gay shit.

I was like, and he's an actor And I was like, but you're an actor, like you should see it.

It's it's not a bunch of gay shit. First of all, Like, yes, there's this is it's a life, this.

Is a life, this is life experience. It's like we're learning, we're studying their lives. And honestly, if I remember correctly, I haven't seen Moonlight maybe in a while, but I don't remember there being that many gay scenes.

There weren't that many, but the ones that I think, the one was nothing like rough. It wasn't rough like we're watching soft gay porn. But it is like, you know what it is. I think they do it like they highlighted it when they're teenagers.

They just like kissed though, no, they like.

Kind of like they kind of fade out and there's obviously like maybe some sucking or jacket noises and it gets a lord. First of all, I this is so hard to record without.

Blasting my life and the people in it.

Like, wow, I went with the guy who I suspect and my grandmother.

Oh and my grandmother is super Christian. She's cool though, but it smokes weed. But she was thought it was a great movie. He was like, oh, I didn't know this is what that movie was about.

And I was like, well, me either, but like I could tell, you know, like he was just completely thrown off about it.

But oh my god.

He also made a reference to another movie, a comedy movie, and he was trying to refer to a actor in the movie.

And in the movie.

Okay, so it's a movie with Amy Schumer when she's like snatched not snatched, train Wreck and she's she's smashing the bodybuilder guy.

And he's like, oh, He's like, oh yeah, that guy in the gym was so hot his shoulders, I like when you turn around your shoulders, and it was like, it's like a brief part of the movie and it's funny because then he comes.

But like he was trying to reference the actor and he specifically referenced this part of the.

Movie, and I was like, wow, that's very Yeah, it's amaze you feel I feel, you.

Know what I mean.

So I mean, I just I just feel like for like this guy, like I was just like, but you're like.

The thing about it, too, is like he grew up around a lot of gay people and not in a like I don't know. I just felt like it should be more the more you're around and the more you should be more. That's why I was more shocked by it.

And that's why it made me feel like, is there something wrong you're feeling like inside of you that you're not comfortable with that you can't even watch any movie that has any sort of any side. But I get, like, I get that most men like they don't want to see like men having sex if you're straight, Like I get it because sometimes, like honestly, it's even too much for me me too.

I know that movie I was I could. I was a little honestly.

Like personally, like, I don't enjoy going to the gay club. I don't have any I have many gay friends. I love my gay friends. It's just not I just don't enjoy it. It's not for me. It's not exciting for me.

No, it used to be, and I lived in Atlanta it was funner. But here I'm not a big fan of the gay club.

For me period. It's just never been my cup of tea. So I get it.

But like, I just feel like sometimes when you're just so like anti, it just kind of tells me something about you. And yeah, anyway, so our last our last sign is body language that can be really confusing. Yeah, I mean, and that's usually why I think, like most of time, be like, oh yeah he gay, he's there, and you can.

Be wrong, yes, thereferent times I've been. That's why this is a tricky one. It's a dangerous one. Yeah, this is a dangerous one because I mean, essentially, this is what we do all the time. We judge, even if we don't want to be judgmental people.

Human nature is we are judging each other, like on appearance, on talking, all types of things and Yeah, sometimes people can talk gay and that doesn't mean shit, but it could mean shit if all the like, if all four of these topics line up, plus they have very feminine body liningugs, this is like a Soreanta five situation.

So don't go home because you had found one and there like you got on the right. But if there's like three or four of the five, you might need to really replace some things in your.

Head because certain talking, you know, like I'm going to the clubs.

Wait, what was that?

Mike, my gay cousin always puts that impersonations really bad.

Okay, I'm not a good impersonator, but you know what I mean, like gay talk and like that risk, like you talk about the pinky oh and like the switch of the hips.

Well the sway that was the one on the website. I had found the one thing that we agree with.

Like there's a guy that.

I know who's not openly gay, and when he gets around the girls, he's a different person, gets girlier.

Yeah, he'll be using all types of oh girl, right.

Oh honey, or it just like he just more like comfortable loose.

But you know it also it is I notice if you do have somebody who.

Is a little uh has a little sugar in that tank.

If you start to get them drunk or they start to drink and they get more comfortable, like maybe they're.

Not as aware of it.

I've noticed people who I suspect once they start drinking, it's more clear because they're a little bit looser and a little bit more hate.

Girl, And then you can tell yeah.

But then there's been like you were telling me the story of the two guys, like the one that was raised by women versus the guy who grew up in Boston and the one that raised by women and had the high.

Voice, and he even a minute, he's like, when I get really excited, my voice gets even higher.

Poor baby. He was giggling like like literally just like that. And he was married with kids.

And then the Boston guy who was like super into sports, like these stereotypical things that we associate with masculinity, was actually gay. And he even said he's been in situations where people are not assuming and don't know and make some really derogatory terms, and then you know, he wants to beat somebody's ass because they're not aware because he's talking like a what we think is like a manly talk and he's done manly things and his appearance looks

And you know, so there's there's really no guarantee. I know, there really isn't.

I mean, I've definitely been wrong before just based off of body language, so I I mean, I maybe I'm not wrong. Maybe I feel like I have pretty good gatar. A lot of times I feel like they just haven't. They just don't know.

But sometimes they don't know.

And then also, you know, I'm also I'm really, I guess not manipulative. But there's something about me where I feel like I've met strangers and they.

Get so comfortable so quick they tell me things that I don't even want to know, and I'm like, wow, why are you opening up too quickly? But that's another perk because I think.

If you can make someone feel really comfortable with you and like you're non judgmental, I mean, this is the way to be in life in general.

But people will start to be more honest than you know.

I even go so far as like, I mean like if you like, if you've ever like experimented I mean, it's so normal to be curious. I've experimented with girls, like I always wanted to know because that's little girls like you like kiss your other girlfriends and stuff like that's a part of it. But like for men, we don't talk about it doesn't mean it doesn't happen or

Is that then by curious? Okay, this is my four Is that like? Bye? Yeah?

Because I think like a lot of times for men, they definitely they ever are curious. There's no by curious, it's like you gay or you For women, we can be like a parent socially, we can we can we're allowed to explore that.

Like if a boy like, after three times, it's not by curious no more? You know and you like it? Okay, th three times too? Really for a guy, I'm hate to say, it's like one or two times if you explored in curiosity twice and you went a third round. It's because you liked it.

I mean, I yeah, there's there's a limit to the curiosity. You can't be by curious for a year straight. No, No, get you're by.

But it's possible to be by bisexual at one point and then totally not bisexual anymore.

No.

I mean, even me, I've had like I've only had I mean, minus my child's father, I've literally only been in relationships with women, which I think is really strange. Really, I didn't know that only like long term living relationships.

But do I think I'm gonna end up with a chick? No, I don't.

Well, at one point I thought that I could be lesbian for the rest of my life, and then I grew up and realized quickly, like I need fleshy, real penis.

But I don't know.

Maybe I think with women and women, like we're on the same wavelength where it's like easier to be more comfortable, easier to settle down, Like it's just.

An easier thing for me. I guess it was easier or maybe I am a lesbian shit, I don't know, but yeah, I don't know. Maybe it's just me.

But I wouldn't go so far to say I'm no longer bisexual, right cause I still can see a girl.

I'm like, oh, she's cute. I taped that.

But it doesn't mean I want to be in a relationship with you. No, But I would never say like I don't like women anymore. That doesn't fade away like I mean, they'd be less intrigued to like pounce or like approach them. I'm not gonna go like trying to holler at no chick. But I could be like, the girl looks good, and I'm not gonna tell anybody like.

Oh, I used to be bisexual, but now I'm not. I'm saved again, saved, which I also totally don't believe it.

Of course, you cannot pray the gay out of you, and you're gonna You're gonna hurt yourself doing that more than anybody.

So my last question for you is, and I have a lot of opinions on this, which.

I mean, I mean a lot of people disagree, a lot of people agree.

But do you think people are born gay?

Yeah? I think I was born gay, I mean not gay.

But because do you think that like situations can make you gay or were you always had that in you.

I think it goes both ways.

I think for some people, unfortunately, like we discussed, sometimes things happen to them in childhood that traumatize them to the point where they don't want to deal with the same sex being So I was a hardcore lesbian for like five years straight. I'll say that almost every single girl I messed with, all of maybe two, had never had any sexual trauma. Maybe one had never been molested, had never been touched, and was just gay.

But for the most part, a lot of women had had shit. And that's why I mean, I mean, this is so stereotypical but true. Like strippers, sometimes when shit happened to as a child, it develops differently. But some people are born gay. Like I got a cousin and he's been My mom was like he's been gay since he was born. He was wearing my shoes when he was three, you know. And even for me, like I remember having a crush on my front at five years old. I remember like I.

Couldn't wait to go over there so we could play house. And because she was a tomboy or she's tom boy now and she's a lesbian, but you know, like, I will deny that. That's how I felt as a child, and even for me, even at like twelve or thirteen, I was like I am a lesbian.

I was a self per playing lesbian. I wasn't afraid. But unfortunately we don't really live in a society we're as a young age, it's accepted to say those type of things, you know, So I think it goes both ways. What do you think? I agree? I agree, I think that you're born gay?

Yeah, Like I don't think why would why would someone want to take the harder route?

Right?

Why would you want to be make your life harder unless you absolutely cannot help that that's what you're attracting, you know what I mean?

Like?

Why would? I mean?

I do think obviously, like you know, situations in your in your childhood can help, can push you towards, push you towards, you know, whatever, your sexual preferences at some point. But I still do I don't have a definitive answer for like, maybe you guys, if you guys have experience with this, If you guys are you know, have been, are gay, or are bisexual, or are a victim of abuse? My question is, like we're when you were a child,

Never did it more than three times? No comment, Yeah, I just really would.

I'm just curious as to how people feel about Like what if you're sexually abused as a child before you really get the opportunity to like even really fully make that decision, right, Like can that make you gay? Can that make you straight?

Like? How does that? I don't know if there's really an answer there is, because everybody's different.

Everybody has different experiences and their input takes them differently, Like me and you could probably have had the identical situations as children that happen, like you know, something maybe traumatizing happen, and you could go one completely other way, and I can go completely this way. Just like help people, you know, parents have like alcoholism or drug abuse issues.

Either you have a kid that goes down the same road, or you'll have a kid that absolutely will not drink or do drugs because they're so traumatized by it. So it's just like a personal, you know, case to case baces I feel like, But I think overall.

The moral of this podcast episode is for me, like I just want people to be accepting of who they are, you know what I mean. Like I wish that like these men that I dated could have felt comfortable enough to be open, be open with me, because there are men that are totally they don't care. It's totally fine with them.

Obviously, for women it's different. Oh you mean, oh for the women dating guys. Yeah, true, Yeah, And.

Just like be open and like, I know that's a lot. It sounds it's so much easier so than done. It really is, especially in the society we live in, especially if you're a black man or brown even white. I mean, it's you know, it's difficult, it's difficult.

But the guy that I know suspect I knew, and I liked it.

But there's so many women that don't. Yeah, you liked it, but some women might not. If I know women that would.

Never do it.

Personally, I don't really want to date a man who's bisexual.

I don't want to.

I mean, but I also in that experience, I realized and learned you'd be surprised when you like someone and someone's honest with you what.

But you'd be willing to do what you're willing to do yet because the truth is, for me, like people who are themselves weird or indifferent or mysterious, or when you're yourself.

Something about that, it's attractive when you don't give a fuck, because I'm the same way, and you know what, it also for me, a lot of it I realized was now it was nice to date someone who could accept me. And because you guys your own shit and you're not, you know, like the perfect standard, it was easy for me to be completely myself too, because I knew that we could accept each other in all of our weirdness.

Right, I mean, I guess you're right.

I guess maybe I can't make that statement that I wouldn't or I couldn't it's maybe the fact that my choice was taken from me right that I didn't like, except I don't.

Like give me the option. At least, don't be out here embarrassing me in front of my homeboys.

Trying to get a freak show on the low right, like, of all the people to choose from you, like.

Friends, mess that's messy. I don't want any messy gays. Okay, not as friends, not as lovers, none of that. Ship. I don't want any messy gays because you know, the gays tend to be a little messy, not a little, a lot the messy, honey, they messy. This topic is real deep. We're gonna smoke after this, I know.

Yeah, we didn't smoke this time because I got this episode. Mila got a little too high at the top and she was like losing trains of thoughts. Same side, there was positives and shit, I'm gonna be sober.

Let's slightly separate now.

Actually anyway, so I guess that concludes this episode. I just I just want us to like end on a positive note that we accept all, we accept all, we love all, We even love you, you closeted men.

That are, and we just want you to come to terms with them. We want you to be honest with yourself and others. It's gonna make your life a much better place. And you'd be surprised that people are willing to love you and accept you the more you're willing to love and accept yourself. Yes, it's very true, and this is why we're here, because people are gonna have a hard time loving and accepting us with all the topics we talk about.

But hey, this is it, This is it.

Look I'm trying to I'm still learning to love and accept myself all right, So every day struggle.

But anyway, thanks for tuning in, guys, cut you later.

Oh we didn't do a Horri Horris our next time. We can do a Horry next time. Okay, and make sure to follow us on Instagram.

At Good Mom's Underscore Bad Choices.

And we're working on a Twitter, hasn't They haven't. We haven't finalized a name for it because apparently Parental Advisory everything we've come up with is taken. So we'll get back to you with that and then what's our email Parental Advisory GMBC at gmail dot com.

So if you have any questions, concerns.

You want to hate us, you want to like bash us, you can send shit there.

You want to send us free ship, you can do that too.

We'll send you our addresses and over, okay next time.

And give in his life.

But all he tells me he is like to K, I don't believe the down window by my nestor round and do it cother need some afection, shocking Yeah

St about stream yeah, streams, lackey, that's what