Haters gon' Hate

The Blaze is going to playte is going to hate going to.

The Mother's going to ball. I don't mind what people say you do, but I don't mind what do you believe to you?

Are you leave on getting your mother? Because what they do, what they do ain't nothing to do play. They don't playing and hate ball shot coming, Welcome back.

This is good mom's bad choices. I'm Erica and I'm Nila, and we're back.

I feel like we've took her two weeks off. I feel like this has been a while. Well, be recorded. Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah, take two weeks off. We're prerecorded. Yeah, it wasn't as a like before. It wasn't like VAKA like on vacation. You're right, yeah, yeah, is that girl? What did it do? I think there's a plane passing. There's always a plane passing. Can you hear like the crickets? Like the outdoors.

I wonder have you ever have you ever listened to Oprah's Super Soul Sunday podcast or watched it on the own networks. She's always outside in her garden, like drinking lemonade. There's like the birds like yeah, so I kind of we.

Know we're doing our own version of the Super Soul Sunday Good Monster. That's I was thinking. Maybe it's like we're camping.

Yeah, basically odd. We were out there and there was a rat that was Yeah, there's crickets. My backyard is very active.

Why did we take oh, because why did we take two weeks off? Oh? You went to Jersey. I went to Jersey and you went to Florida. I went to Florida. We said, it's like fucking every week because I mean I went, like, I feel like I'm in Florida. A lot that's going on. I was Florida. It was cool, you know. We we were doing work out there and ts. No, I'm done with Tinder.

Although you know.

I was going to hang out with Jasmine je sitting Jasmine. Oh we didn't. We didn't. I didn't have time. We didn't. We haven't made it happen. We're gonna hang out.

Hopefully the next time I go out there and chill, maybe I'll get some fetish trainings.

Oh that would be nice. You could come.

Sure, that'd be really nice because I always kink it up a little more, always step up my game.

I'm always into like tips and tricks. If you guys have any tips and tricks, you please also don't tell me those.

Yeah, I think all women continues some act like speaking of tips and tricks, can you please send us your horries book service announcement.

We're gonna start with us at the top.

We're trying to do like a fun, hoary Halloween episodes, so we need like all the top horries.

Yeah, we need all your hotels, scary scary horror stories, juicy ones, ones you wish you never that never happened, embarrassing.

We need an effer an episode, which is I know it's asking a lot. We need on enough for well, we need at least like six good ones. Yeah, but yeah six to ten.

Oh my god, I fucking just you could pick me up from like the crab Shack or whatever the fuck b by Crabby crab on fan eyes right across from the thatches that.

Yeah.

I love crab and ship and like the eating pill. But I fucking smell like occasion. You do you actually smell like I still smell the kids spurt? Is that what it is?

Spicy peppery? She got in my car and I thought she had food with her and she was like, no, it's me, but listen, the thing is like I love it, but every time I go, I'm like, do I don't have anything to do tonight?

And I was like, you can't do it.

No, you ain't going. You better not go try to go to house. No like that.

Goddamn sure, No, you need like a two day details. You didn't like sit in Vinegar like it's so strong. I couldn't live in New Orleans. That would just be a occasions. Okay, anyway, sorry I took myself off the beat.

How was journey? Okay? So yeah, Florida was cool?

How kinks and tricks? Speaking of kinks and tricks, oh Flora? Okay, okay, okay, I say you actually have a kink or a trick?

Oh? Do I have a king trip? Yeah? A kinky trick? Yeah, like any tips or kinky tricks?

Like to add, I'm always into what other women's kinky trips like chips are because then you can implement them in your bedroom and like spice of that maybe something you didn't know about.

Are you asking me what of mine right now? Currently?

Oh?

My god, put the spot.

I just want to know if you're some shit I don't I'm not doing and if anybody else has any, I mean we should share them, right because they you like, step up everybody's secks. Games is like a community situation.

I mean, I always like, I think role play is really fun. I like to role play. Some people are I'm down for it. Some people are you gotta feel it out.

I am into role play too, but I feel like that that sad suggestion kind of scares people and they can.

Come off so I know, what do you mean, come off wrong? Not come off wrong? Like I don't think. I like, I don't think everybody can get into it, and of course not.

They're not an a star actress, action, a working actor, an active actor.

You're not an active actor. You may not want to be engaged in such.

A we literally someone recently, an actor, said that they're an active actor and I was dead, like, what do you mean.

An active okay?

Anyway, okay, because there was a time like I was in a relationship and I was like, oh, like that's role play.

Like halfway through he was like, all right, like I don't want to but I want to fuck you. This is like he couldn't.

He couldn't like, yeah, yeah, I think role play is like Okay, maybe this isn't a good kink trick because it's more for I feel like, for me, I do a deeper in relationship, like it's not like straight off the bat day one. But maybe maybe if you did, maybe if you did, it would like, you know, open up the relationship to be like more like it would be a broader, open relationship earlier, because.

Why do we wait till to de fan to do kinky ship. You're right, maybe I need to step up my role play again with happy Bay.

But then I also would be scared to just like go out to character and hope that the first catch catches alone. You know, Okay, you know what I think would be a good way intro love. I've never known this, but I've always wanted to intro level role play, Like I meant to do this fuck and like get a hotel and then maybe like you go down to the bar first, or like he goes or meet somewhere and just schedule the meet and then.

Act like you're, oh, like you're new, You're like like you're like a couple, a stranger. That's like level one, right, Yeah, it makes it easier.

I think you kind of give a idea just like an idea for like a married couple a relationship for a long time time to spice it up. Speaking of this, I have a hair dressesdn't tell me this crazy story that she was at the buzz stop and this this woman pulled up on.

Her and was like, oh did that like like I have you so beautiful?

Like I have a guy friend that is single, and I think you guys like some weard shit like this she got. She goes back and forth with this woman, texting they made up at a bar her in this guy meets stuff and she's like, it's obvious that they are married have a relationship.

And then if she's just steady playing and this is this friend that she's trying to like pass her on, took her up with and it's just a screaky crazy so she wanted her to suck her man, but she kept saying she said they kept sucking up and saying like, babe, did she did?

Wait? Did the wife or girlfriend end up wanting to be a part of it? I need to like get this girl because this is a random haare dresser told me the story, but there's not going to but she I forgot. I think she finally was like, you know, I know what's up.

I know what you're trying to do. Like I can tell that you guys.

Know each otherday, like you guys are sucking and I think that they're like finally admitted that, like yeah, they're just like trying to open up.

But I thought, wow, what you went to level of ten and that's kind of hot, Like who knows to what? Like to what extreme will you keep your your sex life active?

It's coming soon topic, yeah, maybe to any extreme because then it's you know, it's kind of like that kinky little secret just between you guys.

You know what's going on. And actually she kind of got preyed upon for sure.

Yes, that's very yeah, I want to do that. That's kind of like that's sexy about it's sexy for them for that. For her, it's like girl, like I like turned on by like.

My partner.

How far shall we go together? We're of your predators, let's get But I was like, damn, that's what I'm thought about about the couple. Oh my god, Oh but that's what that's what I mean. Okay, obviously they went to Great lumps Cape their marriage popping, but that's what I mean.

Like, that's why we should share with you. What's your trick tip?

Oh tip, I told you what I think level like a nice entry level. Well no, but else is that you know that's gone wrong for me? I kind of did that sort of in my last relationship. I rented a hotel. It wasn't like a secret like that, but it was like I went to a hotel room. I like got all these sexy games we could play, like spice.

It up, and it did not go well. Why he was like offended? Guys are stupid. It was off immediately.

Huh you cut that off immediately? No, okay, it was it was a rough patch offended. Yeah, I mean no, you shouldn't be offended. She actually offended. I'm trying.

That was a sign. Yeah, I don't know why I see it earlier.

I think like sex ships just like a surprise pussy wax, if you don't always do that, like hey, look what I've done today, you know, look at this or like that, or like if you were like an outfit that you can't tell or something sexy underneath and then like let that person in.

Just even like that.

It's a little bit sexy if you've been in like a like a you know, same old same, to give them those panties that vibrant you got to go to dinner.

What you seen those? Give yourself the panties and you give them to your partner so you're out with people. He can press the bike.

Oh oh yeah, I control the vibration. No, oh my god, that's sounds fun. Right where you get those? Oh okay, that's interesting.

But I feel like you can be like vibrating.

Loud, polightly pull them down. I think I saw that in the movie Clear Any real person have this experience, But it sounds like a grind. Its sound a good idea. I think I'm going to do that, even like we're pulling out a video camera.

It can be kind of sexy.

I definitely you have to really trust that person, though, well you know what. I did it at Dang Bay and Jersey speaking of my trip, and he did it on my phone and I was like, this seems incriminating.

He's like, it's your phone and I was like, proceeds to put an extra work, open the secret drop box right for blackmail. I'll get you, mecga.

You want revenge porn? Totally kidding. Happened, Yeah, I found myself before, but I have to like for hours. It was like a regular thing that place your ship. Oh yeah yeah, but that was a lot of information. Sorry, I did it all.

Every time. Call me coverport, just call me kid. This one, this one is from the part.

Well hence that if you guys never heard this, this one episode where I tell Horry where my dad turned on my computer that was connected to my TV. This is like the most embarrassing episode. And literally the thing is, it's all the way across the screen and my head is caught to the side, full thing, full throttle up and down on it, and my dad's like steady tenntion in computer off and he can't and I'm just going to town.

It's like my face, closest flock, the biggest fun on.

The TV and a penis and that's like my favorite hor Almost I forgot about that, but okay, so that's maybe that's not a good kink chure.

Don't fuck no if you're gonna record.

Oh, I know one we ever observed to killing it, but I'm sure we're thinking about the one we needed submission And I think it's a sexy if you're a guy, is like at work or like not with you or send them out a video playing with yourself.

Oh yeah, that's like you do that all the time. I've done it.

Yeah yeah, yeah, Oh my god, we're high. Obviously I'm crying.

I'm crying. Okay, I'm gonta make.

Up of this.

Jesus Christ. Okay, wow, okay, anyway, I don't know if you guys that's funny, but yeah, okay. Oh oh, so I went to Jersey. We scheduled to have uh therapy. She said, do what you want to go?

Yeah, screwity is some screty. No, I'm anyway, whatever fu it.

We did Molly therapy. We got a hotel room and we did Molly therapy. Well that was what we called it. We just did. When when you told me that, I was was.

I was really curious how that was gonna go. Because I don't feel like Molly's the drug to have therapy.

I think it is. I think mushrooms more. Really have you ever done mushrooms?

I have, but yeah, Molly's more like it doesn't make you tell like a lot of your true feelings. Molly, I think, yeah, I think it's just immense love, which which yes you I mean that, which if you're someone you love and it's amazing. But I feel like it's it's like one of those like one trick pony drugs. It's like always a mense love or it's like you're small, you're in a bad it's that bad. Yeah, I mean it was actually a pretty lightweight.

Wow, it was fine.

It's that you want to go out, you want to yeah, exactly, trying to therapy, Yeah, yeah, fun. Yeah, we've been like even tell me everything. Let's talk about that dancing, yeah, because I think it hit like a little bit before we left and we were.

Just like dancing a little bit, like alright, but to go okay, kissing, to go to dinner and.

Ate not.

I'm not why did we even come, but you know what, we like walked It was like ocean like I don't know how you say, like New Jersey like uh, edge water or not Edgewater like you know, prank cross with the fucking cityre no, like yeah yeah yeah, and we like walked along the water. It was a brisk fall weather, the moon was shining. That was like a bit therapeutic for like the ten minutes there, and that was nice. It was fun.

We drank and smoked whatever. You know, bad choice is shit.

But I didn't have my kid diverybing now because my kid was not Molly therapy.

So like you me, Yeah, that's pretty much it.

Oh and oh this.

Weekend, you're gonna talk about a weekend? Oh yeah, this weekend I went to my friend.

My girlfriend was having a huge runway show during LA Fashion Week.

Shout out to the Model Experience.

Anybody who's aspiring to be a model in somewhere, you should definitely go. Yeah, her, her company is legit. If you're trying to be a model, get experience. You don't know where to start. You need runway experience. You need headshots, you need to look fly a ship, you want cute Instagram photos.

At the Model Experience.

Anyway, I was one of her shows and h Happy Bay was there. Oh oh, I didn't know that he was teaching.

Oh he did. Yeah, Oh, I didn't know that we had like five shows that day. He d all all shows and uh yeah. So we went there and then we were gonna go.

We were like all we were talking about, like what we're gonna do after the celebrates, like someone of her biggest shows's ever done. Three hundred models blah blah blah. I'm like, okay, we gotta go Sam's because you know, a bitch love Sam's. We've talked about not Sam's Club, the supermarket, but sam right, just in case anyone thinks like rim and they were not talking about Samson Market. Were We're talking about Sam's. The strip cluff that's local

A monthst the better ones in La went. It's like the only one that crazy girls, crazy girls. I hate people even say that one so bad. Yeah, there's back downtown. I had LA ship clubs. I've never remember Rhino, have you.

Yeah, it's just like classy because they don't have like State. I don't like classic, like cheatah, I like, well, I like classy, right, I like classy ratchet. Yeah, La sucks for ship clubs. It's not like if I'm gonna go, I guess I go to Sam's.

But but yeah, So we got out of that and then we pulled into Oh. I told Jamila to come meet me. I was like, come meet me at like two o'clock. That afternoon, We're going to Sam. I was like, yeah, it must find Sam. What's going down? So then she she's coming. I'd like to ask for all day. She's coming. She's like, gabbage, I'm coming. Okay.

So I pull into Sam's with the happy Bay, who is amazing still, and then with Ashley and who else my diffriend Ashley and I pull in and the first thing I see is my baby Daddy's jeep in the parking lot at the strip club.

And immediately I'm just like, fuck, like I have happy with me, Like he doesn't.

I mean, obviously I'm single, but like he's never really we don't talk about me dating. I'm sure he knows that I'm dating, obviously, he doesn't inquire, He's never said anything about it. And it just felt like immediately I felt anxiety. I was like, I don't want to be here.

This is awkward. Me and him are, you know, on and off in a weird place.

And I just didn't think that the strip club was like the right opportunity is that the first time him meeting someone in dating, especially him drinking him I know you've been drinking.

I know, it's just not going to be weird. It wasn't going to be good. It's just very weird.

And that was like that first time that like I've been encountered with that, with that dilemma. I guess it's not a dilemma. It's just like a real life thing that's bound to happen. But I'm going to be dating someone and at some point my ex is going to meet him in some in either a planned capacity or an out of the blue one.

But I just didn't feel like the strip club was the appropriate you.

I mean, at first, I was annoyed because I'm not gonna lie like I can only at the house to go to strip up and I meant to text you and I left and we were just talking about I mean, after first.

I was like, I wouldn't have wanted to defend me.

I'm so glad that you weren't alone, though I thought was like are you yeah, You're lied to be like wait, are you alone?

I'm like, no, yes, baby, baby, I'll be there in a second. Okay. Anyway, it was just it was just it was weird. It was weird, and.

It's like, you know, after after we left, Happy Bay asked me like, did you not go in there because of me like, like it's it because she's like, what was that? I'm just curious, and I I could tell he was like I feel a little concern, maybe a little insecure, but like you know, And then I was like, no, it's not not really, it didn't. It doesn't really have anything to do with him per se, but it does

It's has nothing to do with him. He is great.

He would approach a situation in the best way possible. He's so loving and great, you know what I mean.

It's not that, it's just that I also have so much respect for him.

I didn't he doesn't deserve to for this encounter, this first encounter with male testosterone and all that, to be in a strip club tennes Yeah. Yeah. And baby Daddy spent a lot of time in that strip club prior to this moment, so he, you know, he is very comfortable in there. And I just didn't feel like it was like even a fair playing ground of even like an introduction to something.

So that was weird. And now I'm like, what the fuck does this look like, like how does this?

How?

What is the appropriate time and play to do?

Because when you said it and me think like, damn, will there ever be in time? Well, obviously eventually at some point where we're gonna have to be around our new dud. Well, he knows you have a dude, I know, but like, well, because he lives out of town, the likeliness of him ever meeting him is is very slim, especially because it's not No, it's not because he'll come out here and I know I'm not gonna let you purposely, Yeah,

Outside, you know what I mean? Like you can only hide in that situation for song. You shouldn't.

You shouldn't, Oh my god, seeking this okay? So perfect example actually, but not perfect because it's not a thing. So obviously I was in Jersey, I had to like, you know, I'm facetiming Lou and usually I do. I avoid it, like I watch till him alone, and I did wait till I was long, But like he started

Yeah? So he comes in the camera and he's like, hello, what she doing? Hang her out like talking to her. And I didn't want to be like no, no, get out the.

Camera, but I was just like I just let it ride, and I like sack like moments later, like I waited like fifteen seconds for it, and then the phone hung up mysteriously and he said this phone night.

But I know that it was just like he could see him. It was awkward.

That's a preview what that's gonna look like, right, Well, I mean he's so mature, That's why I would like, he.

Probably wouldn't do shit. He probably so quiet. If you met Anthony, you probably wouldn't do shit. He wouldn't. He's not gonna do shit. But I'm just I just know it would be awkward. I mean, I just I can totally understand where you're coming from.

Not wanting to give in that situation in any way shape form or fashion, especially.

At a ship club.

And it's not like it's not like in passing you're about to leave. You just up in there, chilling, sitting Sharon looking at it, pissy and drink drinks.

Like I just have a feeling had I went in there like he would have like.

Went hard with girls in front of me because it's hurt right, well yeah, probably yeah, And it's not that I it's not that I'm like romantically even have I don't have romantic feelings for him anymore really, but just I don't need that visual.

No, nobody wants that visual.

And you know what, it's not like fresh and new. However, you haven't had to see that, right, that is fresh and new. That is fresh and new, yeah.

And yeah, and not that it might not even ever happen.

That's just like what I was what I didn't want to have to be. I didn't want to have to see that and experience that with I didn't want him to feel my energy shift, right and change. And he did anyway, he felt my energy shift when we left, and he was like, are you okay? And he was like, I want you to know, like if you want to go in there like and I don't want me to stop you and your friends.

From having a good time. I was like, me and my friends are not gonna have a good time to go on because I don't want to be there.

I would rather I would much rather go somewhere else together together, yeah, or just not go at all.

Right, But anyway, that was interesting. I just it's like the first time that that's happened.

I'm sure like that's happened to many people before, probably some of our listeners and stuff. If you have any advice as to how you introduce introduce your insignificant other or even just someone you're dating to your baby daddy smoothly, let me know, right well.

Then me try to make it seem like it's cool. You know, it's so good, Like you know that's that I give a fuck.

You know it's so good, like you'll never have to worry about you know, it would be weird a friend of like your friend.

I'm like, I guess anyway, awkward, but it is awkward anyway. This weekend we also got our first hater. Yeah we did. We got like a friend. We've got a hater. We've had a hater before, not like this, though. The other one. Yeah, we have like a hater before, but like it was my fuck up. Oh wait oh yeah yeah that hard. Yeah, yeah, is that what you're talking about? Yeah, you're talking about Yeah, when I talk about we're like in high school.

Yeah, at least, well we got a thread of ship talking basically about.

I think it's it's kind of it tickles me a little.

About us basically talking too freely and openly about sex in front of our kids.

M h. I think that we've been doing this for eight months and we've gotten so much love that I'm like, I mean, this is the thing, is that I feel like I'm careful about what I say in front of my daughter, you know, like nobody's gonna be more conscious than us, Like of course my daughter is.

Of course maybe well maybe to some people, I am too free with her, you know what I mean, And that's fine, But I know what I feel. I know that I have good boundaries, and I know that I'm teaching her, you know, about sex, body parts and all those things, so that it's it shouldn't be an awkward conversation.

It shouldn't be like some secret conversation.

Of course I'm not having like like I don't want her to be in the room I'm talking about, Like, I don't want her to be listening to me talking about my like nastiest horror story.

No, not really, I don't. And how about this, you guys, you're not here?

Yeah? Ho about you're not here? And we pause, we edit this shit sometimes. So yeah, it just kind of like opened up this conversation. It's bigger conversation for me about just how people judge people as parents because and I was telling Jamilla this, like I feel like everyone's everyone's experience as a parent is so based off of whatever they experience growing up, and everyone's experience is unique.

How about this, who the fuck are you?

No, there's that too, more like this Chris girl was so disrespectful though, Like she was talking about our kids, like, yeah, I mean, and of course we put ourselves out there, Okay, we do have I mean, yeah, we're very transparent, and that's a part of the whole reason why we did this is like we're going to do it and be honest or not do it, and we obviously our kids are a part of it because we're moms and that's inevitable.

That's just the bottom you know, Like that's the bottom line. Like who if you felt real concerned.

This is the funny part is that the this this blog that had this stream of comments, The woman who wrote the blog post kept commenting like when of the people would comment, but like respond, this woman had listened to like almost all of our episodes. She's like she was like referring to the titles and the names and the different guests we had, and I'm like, here's my thing. If you have such a problem with my podcast, why the fuck are you listening to every single episode?

If it's such a problem, Right, you like it? Yeah?

You like just you like it?

I like it. You're right, just like it because I listened to like twenty minutes old podcast. She tried to say, like she tried to like, that's why I don't like what You're gonna just hate. They just hate. Don't like try to be nice and then hate. Like she was like, oh, you know, they seem really smart, but like, that's what do you take that's how kids turn out fast?

Actually, dude, kids tearing out fast because the moms are not having the conversation. It's completely avoided. They're not educated in those manners. They're basically the fuck oblivious. But one thing is for sure, and few things. I'm sorry we're not talking about it to our three year olds about specifics, but they're definitely gonna be exposed and they're definitely gonna be knowledgeable and educated, and it's not going to be some taboo conversation.

So you know, I was just really good the whole thing. The funny part is like we got a comment that referred to like this this some some blog that we've never we've never been on. So I'm like, what does this comment? What does this mean? I call her like do you see this? What does this mean?

She's like what? I was like, what is this?

So I come over.

We're like trying to go on the internet and figure it out. And if you can see us to school, Like, just like, how do.

You work it? What shopping? We gotta sign up for a membership. Yeah, we have to sign up for a memory.

So people signed up for a membership to get talk share about other people. Yeah you go, you can through great lens to just talk some shit.

Just call your home the fuck Like it's like a member.

She had to get approved. I don't think I ever got approved. I was probably a waiting list calling people like you got an account at him?

Okay. I'm like, maybe if we put it on the Google.

Googling this shit bag, I'm a pictures two hundred and sixty three pages and one topic.

How will we ever find it? Oh my god, let me find it? Like we found it. I was like, what, Okay, So the girl who whatever. I don't spend too much time on this woman because she is trying pictures. She's trash.

But that's not even not she didn't even I'm talking about the girl. I'm talking about the girl who made us aware of this, Like the girl who wrote the post on the blog.

She was she was a hater too, But the one who made it aware, made us aware of this. She's really the she.

Was the one who started all of this. She told us about it because she wanted to get us round up. That's what you know, Like it's those people that like plant little seeds if this what was her point of She wanted to to know that people were talking about us and that she agreed with them, but she likes us too.

Why thank you to that girl? I thank you? Sher mom is still listening now, I know she is. Father's still listening now. Guess what. It's crash.

But it's actually, honestly very flattering. I think it's very flattering, Like you're listening? Are you went all into our Instagram and found this and then proceeded to write long paragraphs talking mad Ship in detail because I told her to. Second, Dick, I did because I just gonnat believe like all the things she said about like Luna and just I can't.

I just can't believe it. You know, she sounded like someone doesn't have a kid. Mommy, I don't want my past. It's still in my bulletdouts. I don't want it. Oh so you were Is that what you're telling me? Because you just told me that you ate it, and I was gonna find out that you did it. Okay, we'll go get a snack. There's one, there's you know where they are. Anyway, it was just it just the whole situation.

But it just made me realize, like maybe really think about, yeah, just how we as women judge each other and judge judge other mothers. Mothers judge mothers, baby baby, Okay, you have the chicks close the door a little bit. Okay, just a little bit, thank you, a little bit more, a little.

Bit more.

Perfect, perfect, that's great. Just how mothers judge judge other mothers. People who aren't mothers judge mothers.

Because they think that everyone has this idea and the type of mother they're going to be. And then you're a mother and they are like.

All my conversations, like you're not going to filter every conversation, like something like there's just all these my plans you had for motherhood go out the window, and then you just do what just comes naturally, and you know, and and and like I said, based based off of experience from your past and things that you either repeat or you want.

To change or are just habit because of that, you know what I mean. So I don't know.

I just was like all these women in this little chat room talking and I'm like, this is like such like a microcosm of like what what really happens though, because so many women are are these women involves but in real life just judging women at the grocery store, judging you know, the single mom dropping the kid off

Like I have a girlfriend and she's crazy, and she's.

Like a ten year old boy and she's like, yeah, yeah, not sex this month. I'm like, yo, I'm not having a conversation with you in front of him, but she knows what you're saying. I tell her, like in front of him, like, girl, stop, are you really going to talk like this right now? And then the fact that I'm conscious in front of her kid. I know I'm conscious in front of mine.

You know what I'm saying. Well, I'm gonna kid her. Well, I cous in front of my kid, which is not good. But my kid is also the cousin police. She tells me not to. I mean a Christopher of Iry too. I try, I try, I try. It's three years old.

No, no, no, I mean honestly, Okay, let's think honestly. Do you recall any conversations from when you were three, or do you call feelings and energy and things that were happening.

I don't recall conversation.

I can't recall necessarily conversations with feelings and energy that we're behind the conversations I do.

Do you know what I mean? Honestly? If I'm saying d I c K in front of her, like she's not going to know what that means?

What I mean?

I think if you don't even know what that means, because I call it the real thing exactly. I mean too, like if we're referring to it in real life. If I'm showing, like telling you because it's it's it's it's a penis, this whole conversation is stupid, This whole thing is No.

I don't think it's stupid though, because so many women like don't understand it, And there's probably women right now listening to this right now that are like you are judging or saying like no, I don't have those conversations, or maybe thinking like huh, maybe I should have those conversations.

Yeah, not have those not like purposely like I'm going to talk about pens What a freak I am you know, And I was kidding like you know, but no.

But there's gonna be a realistic approach about the ship because guess what if it's not me, it's gonna be your homegirl.

Okay, just stabbed. It's probably the underwi. We're gonna see your Victoria's secret. Hate the hate your products, hate your products, anyway you can rude yourself. I've ever been ventory secret mode the wings. I don't want to be Maybe I do with this pony. I know that Pony's given me Contreia secret red.

Erica shout out to Vivia Vivica Fox hair stenter is a beautiful ponytail.

I'm about to what do you remember what waves this is? I don't, but it's it doesn't natural hair. It kind of does. Yeah, it's as closest I was gonna get. It's proffin. I'm gonna go anyway. Uh yeah, So I don't know. I just feel like I want to be more conscious of it.

I do think, though, that there are bad parents. I think that there are parents that you know, could be better. I think even me, I'm sure it could be better in certain ways.

I'm not the perfect parent.

That's why I started this podcast to begin with because of these conversations and like I do my self self realizations I've had in like the past thirty two episodes we've recorded, you know what I mean, things that I realized I could be better at. Things I can realize I can loosen up on, you know what I mean, that I overthink. And that's why I started this that we started this podcast because I because my perspective has

And try and like you know, body parts. And there's so many conversations we.

Have with like like with Jasmine and King, you know what I mean, These all these different situations, and this journey of podcasting is definitely and is teaching me and is changing my perspective or solidifying my perspective. And this is why we're here because maybe you'll have the opportunity to actually listen and understand where're coming from and change

Like square of only what it looks like to be a mom.

Because as women as people were human life, there's there's such a there's such a huge spectrum of all the things being body as parents, and we all do it differently. And you know another thing like from women to women doing it like you said, hella dads rappers, gang rappers, why.

Are you talking about my baby daddy? That was very FuG raps. You know, like we don't hear people criticizing fucking your baby daddy. Because I was on the store too. I saw her on baby daddy snapchat. She seemed like a good mom. Then oh all fifteen seconds of the snapitch, I seemed like a good mom. Oh yeah, she seemed like a good mom.

But you know, typical, like they were going in on me, but nobody but brought me all types of names. I was like, what nobody says shit about him being a good or bad dad based on his lyrics?

When she gets six, you're gonna be able to google it or his music videos.

And I'm not trying to put him out there like that him. I'm just saying, in gender in general, men, yeah.

Men don't don't have this high Like no one's like, oh you know what. I'm just saying, like.

It's just not met and high to hell to a different standard and for her equal parents. I mean, obviously the mother is the mother, but it's everything. Women always carry the burden of everything. We're not allowed to have more sex because we're we haven't we take we take things internally, right right, We're not allowed to have fun because suddenly we're like these people that like we're just mothers and we have.

Like three more three more, three people were house after five, you're done, not eligible for marriage? Like oh you guys? About how many people Nope? Cancel? Yeah like that.

I like you.

Yeah, so that's true. That's true. That's true.

It was all women. I mean, this this site is mostly women. I feel like it would be with women and gay men.

Yeah. Well I hope I hope that nobody has time for this ship. Clearly they have a lot of time.

Site is popping for years, a lot of a lot of the talk about a lot of podcasts on this site specifically, and the site's been around for a really long time. I'm not saying the site because I'm sure when the money'll I'll figure it out anyway through.

Black But like, I just don't want to.

I don't want to encourage people to go look up not just our stuff, but just all the negativity that is on there. It's just really sad, Like it's just I mean, it's like any social media properm I guess, like Twitter, It's just this is like the one that is literally dedicated to like gossip. Instagram is like I was say, like seventy gossip.

I would say, if you have enough time to go visit a site to read up about in in.

Use your name, make comments, and read up about two perfectly strangers that are nice enough to tell you their hoary stories on the internet interweb, then you could probably invest your time doing something more productive.

Why don't you start your own vanilla podcast? I can't kind of talk shit.

Yeah okay, okay, I copy, We'll be sure to tune in and comment of it. I will leave that Apple podcast review. I was like, I wond I'm just gonna go and like try to like leave a bad review. We don't really have any only for bad thing anyone's ever said is that our kids are annoying and maybe they need something.

Once. You know, it's not for everybody. We're not for everybody in that's cool, you know what I mean. I love the community that have I love the people that we talk to. I love that we have moms.

I love that we have people who don't have kids yet, but like you know, feel like they can still relate to us because at the end of the day, we're just women and we're just people, and we're we have we're having these like real experiences, and you know, some people just don't feel comfortable sharing those type of things, you know, publicly said some by don't I don't share everything about my life.

I'm just saying I don't some things I just can't. If you know how something we.

I mean to let things play out first internally each so before I expose. But for the for for everybody else, I hope that a big ship. Honestly, being honest on the interweb has made me more open and honest with myself and honestly like liberated, like you know, this is this is my life, this is my all, this is my alt.

Yeah, honestly, I forget what I say me too.

We just upload these while we put the music on, and then I do a little editing, but I don't ever really listen to it. I just look for the breaks where I need to put like elevator music where like my child is chomping on chips, like right now, you.

Can't You're not gonna be a little to buzz this out and oh baby.

I'm all you could eat marsham on us. And I.

Don't really listen.

I just uploaded so like even the other day, like my friend called me and was like, yo, I just lied to you episode.

He's like, you are like wild and I was like, what did I say? And he was talking about that's long, slim, long, thick episode we did.

I got some damn And I was like, guys wanted to know what we were saying about their dongs? I know. He was like, I was like, did I say your name? He's like, I don't know where you talking about me. I was like I don't know, but I was like, yeah, I don't even remember what that. I had to go back and relisten and I was like, oh, yeah, that was funny, but anyway, yeah, okay, have you ever had other than this are fifteen minutes.

The same have you ever had?

So I want to be this is too Well, someone judge you based on your parenting outside of this, judge me, Yeah, like made a common.

Yeah my own's family member. Yeah yeah, I'm just be talking all the time.

But I feel like family members moms will do that because moms, you know, like they like, yeah, they like I mean, of course, and you know what I take into consideration.

My mom's because she's a mom, that she has been a mom longer than me.

And but if there's certain things that I'm just like, well, you know, I don't want to do it like that, you know, like I don't want to do it how you did it.

I didn't like that, I mean, but then there's other things where I'm like, I should listen to this, you know. And it's also an approach. Everybody knows parenting is a very touchy subject. It's very personal.

Tak it very personally, and if you really genuinely care about someone, you're going to be very I mean.

Not that I expect I don't gonna just care about.

Our feelings or whatever, but just like you're just like, hey, sis, you know, study show that if you say d I c K fifty times, right, they've repeated, even though I'm sure there's those studies.

That she and iriate like that.

Oh no, it's true. I mean, irin stop, either sit down or go in another room. I think that I actually recently had a situation.

Well it was, it was, it was.

It wasn't like she was so basically I was at a football game. Irie got mad at my mom for like I was at my.

Brother's football game. I got mad at my mom for like taking something from her, and she like got in her face and was like hey, and I was like what. No. I was like you need to say I'm sorry. And she refused to say I'm sorry, like refused and was like a thing. And so I was pissed because I was like, no, you need to say you're sorry.

And I think it's so she was crying, and she was crying and I was like this is so stupid. Like so then you know my grandma, I was, yeah, so my mom, my grandma. She can't handle when I research crent like the moment, like like what happened. She's like stressing out.

Oh my god, my god, oh my god.

And because she's like she's that like maternal person in her life. That's she just gives her whatever she wants at any time.

You know what I mean.

And so anyway, my mom's friend saw what was happening, and she was like, oh, Erica, stop being mean to her. Just let her have the let her have the cupcake. And I looked at her and I said, excuse me, I'm teaching my daughter a lesson. Please don't undermind my parenting seriously, and like it just like came out of me, like I said it in the most respectful way.

But I was like, ah, don't fuck me, don't interrupt what I'm doing right here. Yeah, and then too, and then like she was like ooh and then.

So like Iri finally chilled out. She apologized, and then I was like I was low key like fuming inside.

I was like so annoyed, right, and it was your mom's friend. This is my mom's friend. And then so then I was like, okay, I need to be respectful. Did your mom saything? No, she's saying, I mean, you was really respectful.

So I turned around to her and I said, look, I apologize, But I was like, I have a bunch of women around that don't let don't that. Do not let me discipline my child. And I'm the one that has to go home with her at the end of the night and deal with all of the all this mixed messaging. And she was like, it's cool you checked me, and I was like, no, I really didn't check you.

Was I disrespectful?

My mom was like, absolutely not. And I was actually surprised that she took my side because sometimes, you know, my mom don't agree on certain things, and even.

She sometimes can look at me as a child, right, you know what I mean?

Yeah, and you have to Yeah, I think within that moment she she really she like tered me as an adult a parent, and she was like, no, absolutely, I really needs to learn and that's not Lee's place. And then okay, yeah, I mean and I agree, and sometimes even yeah, and then sometimes because even with the like like you.

Said, like, well grandparents, you know, there's this this spoiler spoil you come. I come home from a trip and she's been with them, and she's like acting all I'm like, ah no, no, no, no.

No, no, let's reprogramm the brain because you don't get whatever you want whenever you cry, right, you know.

No. That irritates the shit on me too, And I think, I mean, yeah, I think that was appropriate.

But that's what I'm saying, like interfering with parenting, judging parenting. I think sometimes there's been place. There's been times though, when I've seen parents that I felt borderline abusive and I felt inclined to interfere like friends, no, not friends, but like in public, like oh yeah. And then even then you're like, yeah, can I over set up boundaries? So I've seen kids that I wanted to like pull this. I have before I've been like, yo, what what are you doing?

Okay? Yeah? Really yeah, Well.

There's there was one time this kid, this this woman was screaming at her kid in the parking line, just like he was like crying and walking away, and she just kept screaming, maybe like five me yesterday.

Oh it's beautiful.

Thank you.

When when you asked the lady, are you okay? She was like mind mind, and I was like, oh damn, a five year old. Yeah, it was a bit.

It was and I would never like, it has to be really bad for me to interfere with me. But I was low key when I left there. I felt sad for that kid. I was like, what does this kid deal with daily? And then I know, like iuse, I know, like some times all yell at irin, you know what I mean.

I try not to. I try to really like just like enforce, you know. I try to like her to know what my like voices, you know, like no right, you know when I get like that, she knows I shouldn't have to.

Just been very few times, I like, it's usually because I'm tired or I don't know. I think like the first time I ever went crazy.

Was when she was like first starting school and she was.

Just acting a crazy fool every time I would take her to school, crying hysterically.

I know it is not getting in her car seat. Like remember once I were fighting, I was like fighting her in her car seat. She would not get into the car seat. Oh my goodness you me. Yeah, you wouldn't get in your car seat. Remember when you used to cry and went to school? Why'd you cry?

Nice?

Because what you say I wanted.

I know, I always want you too, But you got to learn we all went to school, and your school's really cool.

Still, mom, of course I did, did I know, hold on baby one second? But yeah, you know, but I but I do realize how personal it is. But even you yelling.

Said, you know, saying something to a parent doesn't necessarily change anything.

That's still that's the thing, Like.

That's what I realized, Like, okay, me yelling at this woman about her kid, like maybe it'll help her like snap out of her like rage of anger. But ultimately, like that's what makes me maybe.

Sad, is like she's gonna go home with this kid and who knows what, who knows what she does.

But maybe she was just having a moment, you know, like who knows. You know, as parents, we have moments where that we're not proud of. You know, I've had moments where I've had sam sorry, yeah yeah, And I think that's where.

Parents.

A lot of parents have a problem apologizing to their children. You know, I know my moms. She's gotten better as I've gotten.

Older, but she never would apologize when she would do what I felt was like to going too far, not going too far like physically anything, but just like she was wrong, you know what I mean, right, but that happened. I mean the human like just.

Like having a roommate or a friend that she lived with twenty for seven forever and at no point you're gonna like be ignited and being in a feeling and then later say I apologize, Like that's human nature. Yeah, but our children are just so precious, but they're so smart, and they're so they just mean so much to us. As I'm sure mothers listening know that when someone tells you like you or like questions your love for them.

Do you feel that way? Yeah, Like it's not someone's opinion of me. I mean, of course sometimes shot of course, shit you think about it, but like from a stranger, like I'm no, not really. Yeah, it definitely annoyed me. It annoyed me, but like I said, like I expect it, and it's gonna just be more. It's gonna be just be more.

And I like there was comments made about Luna, Like and first of all, if you're if you're so ignorant to talk about a child, you're not on my level to begin with. I just feel like also like throwing insults about your physical like about your body and like the way you look, it's just like what else?

Who does that?

Like like like it's like some high school really is it was like some h yeah, but you know what, I can't even remember like the last time I got in a fight and someone talked about my body, Like I just feel like, I mean, I know what happens. Body shaming is a real thing, but like like I don't know, it just seemed like so yeah.

It's obviously juvenile. It's crazy, and first of all, like I do, yeah, I do. That's sad.

Well you're just a child hereby it probably is a kid really like someone young and stupid.

I don't even physically it's not I know, a look good Like I'm.

Not like none of that really like bothers me shit like that because I already went to high school, Like I already did.

I've been there, done that.

Like there's a place in your life and you're like, first of all, there's nothing you can't tell me about.

Me that I obviously I'm not aware of. I have this body my whole life, so I'm just like not placed by it at all. But yeah, I don't know. Bullying is a real thing. Bullying bullying adults is a real thing, like Haschal lives on.

This is when I say now that I think about when I think about bullying adults, I think about Kanye being honest and now being like.

They were trying to bully me backstage. They trying to wear this hat, bullying me. They trying to get me not to wear my hat. They're bullying.

It was it was my.

Anyway, that was a travesty. Sorry about that.

I don't know if you know, but I have an extreme fear, like like extreme fear of bugs. And I thought I thought of Jamilla thought something landed on her shoulder. I thought I saw it.

I bumped my daughter's head on the table.

As I'm talking about like being trying to be I am like we talk, was gonna have a lump on her head because.

I'm afraid of bugs. To self for bugs here, not to self serve and protect your child anyway, What are you saying, Kanye West? Is that Oh Kanye saying that was bullying him. Oh yeah, I was saying it.

That me, Like that's how I feel when I say, like I'm being bullied as an adult, but like an asshole.

Yeah, but it's a real thing. I mean it's so it's so minute right now, but like I'm colding me.

Kiss it, kiss it.

Did we talk about Kanye meeting with Trump? No, that's just so he's so over for me. I'm done with him.

I don't care what people try to spend his his cause as down a minute, We're almost got down, promise.

He's pretty terrible. Someone said he was a freedom writer, that he's like what is he like a genius? He's getting good with the Trump and that he's gonna change the world.

Is that what people?

Is? That what people think the girl? They think he's that that intelligent, that way his own plot and scheme to get in. That's what I was thinking. I was like, whonder people think that?

Like they think that he's actually scheming and plotting and this isn't all like a narcissists like playground, like he's.

Like infiltrating on the Yeah.

No, he's just.

No for himself for theeasy government. In his own brainy I kind of feel bad for Kim. I feel bad too. You know that she's probably a little bit miserable. She has to deal with that crazy.

Every day talk to have him talk about crazy Now, how amazing he is all the time.

Don't Like, I'm not doubting his genius. I'm not doubting his innovative ideas. I'm not doubting that he can create musings. But there's there's something, there's that other side of him at Gemini that just can't help but kind.

Of sabotage all that for himself, Like his it gets in the way all of that greatness.

He gets in the way of it by just opening his mouth.

I just can't get with the Like, if you can't intelligently communicate these very top secret ideas that everyone keeps suggesting he has, then.

I can't take him seriously. Have you seen that three D thing? Have you ever watched any of his stories? Yeah, like the hologram that's just crazy? Is that real? I think so?

Yeah?

I think so too. I Mean they're not maybe not necessarily his ideas, but he's in some way part of it. And like that's what I'm saying, Like he has just a new phone. Is it a new phone? The new iPhone? Is it? I said to her, Oh, maybe not if he's out. No, let me loosen it a little bit. I don't know, dude. No, I'm not gonna take it off. I'm just gonna losten it because it's I don't want your hair to be this tight when you go to sleep. I don't know, like him talking about.

Him being in the Kardashian family, there's a lot of there's not a lot of male energy, so he could relate to Donald Trump's campaign more than Hillary's. Clinton's I'm coming. No, I just feel bad for him. But I feel bad for him yet I know she's she's probably like he's bad ship.

I'm telling your knew what she was.

I mean, she didn't care what she was getting herself into. She she loved him, sure she sure that probably still does. But also it was all about he was the coolest rapper at the time, you know, and that was what it was him for him too. She's the finest girl, right, And that's what happens when you are both narcissists and you marry each other, you know what I mean, Something's bound to go wrong.

And one of y'all gonna be crazier than the other. And obviously we know who that is, poor baby or Boo boo. But I don't know how I got it. Oh, I was just I don't know how I got it, Kanye, But I guess I was talking about bullying. Yes, baby, should we do our advice? Oh?

Yeah. So we got a message from one of our listeners, Anonymous, and actually it was a good one.

I think it's one that needs to be talked about. What is it, ladies, Anonymous?

Please, this is a long This is a long story, but backstory is important, I think before you can answer or give advice. In two thousand and nine, I met a guy at work. I was an admin at the hospital and he was sort of a custodian. Immediately, I was not attracted to him on a dating level, but he was always pleasant, et cetera.

Eventually we exchange numbers.

I learned that he had multiple kids and multiple women, and it was kind of a turn with multiple women and it was kind of a turnoff. However, we remained friends and kept chatting. After about nine months, we started to chill and flirt, and that led us to sleeping together. He was in your average low life with a low paying, debt end job and multiple baby mothers. He began school when we met, and I encourage and also helped with late night homework, etc.

He was also a.

Phenomenal father to all of his kids, and there was zero baby mama drama. So between those things his charm and consistency in life. So between those things, his charm and consistency in life, we began a relationship.

We moved in together after a few months, and not even a year had gone by before one of his sons moved in with us. We lived decent as a blended family. He finished school, he came home daily at a decent hour from work. We cooked together, discussed marriage at one point. His career after school began to take off.

After five years of cohabitating, the relationship began to feel tense and rocky.

There was never any suspicion in the.

Cheating, however, you could tell we're both visibly and happy and merely settling for our current relationship. With the state of it, however, ung in there without doing anything to really rectify or even acknowledge that there was an issue with the relationship.

But you could just feel in the air.

Our sessions became fewer and far between, meaning sex sex, but still often enough that no one got the itch for outside sex. The last year of the relationship, we discussed moving into separate places. While he suggested this, I felt like it was a step backwards in the relationship, and he said, why move and still stay together? We should slip. At first, it was tough. We've gotten a

It would mean he either cheated on me or still put me.

At Han's risk by knowingly sleeping with me raw after being with some other girl raw. Either way, I was crushed and cried, and I got the news nonetheless, Nonetheless, I got treated. I called him immediately, which at this point our communication had been tapering off a lot. I let him know the deal, and he swore he had just been to the doctors and was good, which made me wonder if when he told me months back to go get tested he was telling me something then, which

Four months later, I miss him. I'm not mad anymore.

I thought no communication at all, he would at least call to apologize, make an effort, but he hasn't.

I know.

I'm silly for even wanting to reach out, send an email, et cetera. But this is someone I spent practically a decade with while I have been on tender and met random sorry pause for fish already need sext me feel well. I have been on Tinder and met randoms, none of them the quality, d family, orientation, et cetera. Things that I loved about him. I also I also realized part of the disinterest may have been me weight gain, my career remained at a standstill while his grew no longer

Growing as a couple. Any advice for me? I know this is dumb, stupid, long, but I really need your advice because that was long. Girl.

Oh y'all still tune in. Basically, she was with a guy she wasn't even interested in. They you know, they ended up getting together, cohabitating with their kids or his kid, and naturally their relationships started to kind of dissipate, and eventually he suggested.

That they move out.

She didn't really want to break up, but they did anyway, And in spite of their breakup, he had said that she should get tested.

She thought he was just being rude.

Find out later, like six months later, after they've had sex a few times randomly, that she has an STD. Now she was angry, months have gone by, she's not angry anymore, and now she misses him, and it's wondering if it's her fault essentially in some way, or if she's crazy for wanting to get back together with him.

And that's basically what this is in the summary. I told her first of all, she wasn't even interested to begin with. It kind of like grew on her.

And it got comfortable. Comfortable love isn't the love to chase. It's very easy to get comfortable with people because they're there, because it's easy, because it's it's routine. And if he suggested that they move separately, he wasn't really focused on growing the relationship to begin with.

He obviously was out of sex. That's someone outside of it, which means it doesn't respect her. He certainly didn't respect her health enough to give her to protect her.

And and your female intuition is telling you that he said that get tested stuff early on, then you're probably right.

Honestly, that just.

Seems a bit random, especially when there's no suspicion at all, Like what the fuck?

Yeah he knew and I get okay, I hate a woman? Why didn't we do this?

Like?

Oh, was it me? What could I have done? I could have been dressing sexier? I should.

All these things are dun all about stuff reflecting and taking accountability because there's always two parts in a relationship. But even in that I told her, there's a way to communicate to your partner. There's a way to make you feel sexy. There's there's like when there's someone who's really invested in the relationship winning and I know after

To look at these things as friends?

We do that So if you're not he wasn't committed to a relationship, the SCD was definitely the killed and the fact that he hasn't called him four months since that's happened.

Is even more really like obvious that that's that he did that it was him.

Yeah, he's a shame to call you. He's not a calling to a power dies because he he's like, damn, she hasn't called. Oh I'm off Scott Free. We don't got to talk about it. No, men don't want to talk about nothing. They'd rather did not talk about it and never talk to you again. We're just gonna have to acknowledge it and be like, yeah, maybe it was me, right, I mean, not that I want to be with any Yeah. Do you think if you had a guy give you an STD, could.

You like get back together with him?

Yeah?

Mom? You you.

Oh with it?

I mean, hey, we all have been in situations they're like, I would never do that. I was late? Is that so I will never go back to him?

And you do?

That?

Bends to dumbership, honestly, And I'm not judging anybody, but do we deserve that? Fuck now?

But I think that's the problem even in this case, is that we don't realize that we deserve better. And the moral of the stood is they're just dishonesty. There's no respect for ship your life because it's eventually like when you're fucking multiple people are all you're does what you're risky and you know who knows what You're fucking whole ass just transmitting and if you like give a fuck about somebody, at the very least, she'll throw in a rubber.

I think it's super selfish.

And I think you feeling that way out of comfort and wanting companion, you know, cuffing seasons coming is probably getting cold, and you just thinking you're thinking crazy, girl, You're thinking crazy.

So I feel you. I feel you in the cuff and season. Just get some hot tea and some blankets. It'll be fine Netflix and show alone. Yeah, definitely, he's not worth your time and I am. And she says we spent a decade together and fuck that too. Oh and he also was one of the first people she has a She has like a crippling like insecurity about her feet.

We've talked about her on another episode, and she has a crippling insecurity about her feet where she like wears socks, like doesn't ever let guys see her feet. And this person never ever stands even if a she or socks like she wouldn't, so he has seen he's seen all of her, seen her feet, and she feels buld. Yeah, and he touched and so I get that that he has.

She feels like she can be totally vulnerable. But I guess that, babe, you can be that with someone else. If you can do that with him, you can do it again. You really can't. I know you might not want to do it again, but just because of that is not a reason.

I know.

It's not just that.

I know that there's it's deeper than that, but that shouldn't even play a factor in this decision. Like this dude told you he wanted to move out basically so you can go be with other women, whether or not you want.

To admit that or not.

If that's basically what's happening here, then told you to get it tested because low ki, he probably knew something was fishy with him. Then you got you got what was it called the smack clap this smack I even wanting to use that term forever.

I was like, I know I can't.

You're glad, yes, And and hasn't called you, So that tells you right there, like if he hasn't called you, like he's trying to shame you. Too, and so making you feel crazy like you suddenly came up with this out of nowhere, you magically gained.

Yourself an STD. Right. No, I've only been with you, you know, so somebody else. There's better guys out there, there are, they do exist, and they're beautiful. I've seen you.

I felt your energy, like you you can do you can, you can and you will do better. You can will do better.

But first you gotta like remember that ship.

Yeah, and and like you brought up your weight and and like your career being at a standstill and all these things that you know could have possibly been that you're taking accountability for. But even I said, I told you what I emailed you, Like, if that's how you feel about you, Like, if you're not feeling sexy for yourself, you're not feeling like you're in the best shape, then take this time and focus.

On you don't really feel good, you know, like so and take this into your next relationship. Maybe you could be like, you know, more conscious of you know, like stay, I'm all about keeping shit sexy.

Yeah, but as one when we always want to put the blame on ourselves when it comes to that, I used to I did that like I felt like after I had like irie, like I.

Just need it to be more sexy.

That's why I bleach my hair blonde, because I was trying to be like this other vert like this new I'm fun mom, I'm still sexy, Like I still got it.

I could change it up and be like wild, you know what I mean. And it's not.

It's it's not your fault. It's not your fault. If you gained weight, it's not your fault. Maybe it's your fault with your career is at a sandstill. But guess what, Like that's what relationships. Your relationship is going.

To go through that and push it.

You can't And if they can't see that, and if you can't be if you're going to use that and as a as a reason to justify like the endings of.

Your relationship, then you don't need to be in a relationship. And I mean not yet. You got some work to do, and you discussed in the beginning he was the custodian. Did you put you read that? Yeah, at the place you worked, so obviously you were more than willing to stick with him and be.

There when he needed help studying and all these late night things and you know he was, and he was, you know, bettering himself, and shit, give yourself some credit.

A lot of pictures wouldn't do that, a lot.

Of which wouldn't have been interested when to say he has multiple baby mamas there, you know you you had your.

Own reservations and you stuck through him with that. You saw him get better in bro, you helped aid that.

And the fact that he hasn't I mean, even if if that's the case, hasn't aided you in the same way and push you, then fuck him because a good person is going to be like, you know, hey, babe, how are we gonna make this better for us?

What do you think we could do better next time?

You know what I'm saying, Like, I just and I only say that because I'm now for the first time in like a situationship with somebody who is like that, and it's different, you know, and I like it. You know that someone is I'm so once to wants to push me to be the better version of myself that.

Sometimes we forget it's true. It's true anyway.

I uh, I'm wishing you luck, girlfriend, and I hope that you have not emailed him.

Delete the emails. Don't pick up the phone, don't do it, but uh anything else.

No, we are working on merch and we're gonna have that merch up on the site soonersh Jia is looking at.

Me like we are don't say date, don't launch date, no very soon, And so our merch is gonna be so cute, guys would be so cute. And not that normal, not that normal merch, not that normal podcast merger. Nobody wants to wear pod podcast on it. No one wants to wear a shirt that says podcast. No, absolutely not.

I don't.

I don't, even if you're my bestest friend. I mean no, we just do something now. Yeah, it's actually cute.

Yeah, and make sure you follow Mela at Mila's Mobile spa. If you guys need any lash extensions in the LA.

Area or.

Microblading or facials all your spandates, she travels to you in the comfort of your own go onto her Instagram because you'll see.

All of her transformations.

One second, she's gonna do my lashes for mar d Day, so I'll be her next model.

And yeah, that's it. We'll catch you next week. Make sure to follow us on at Good Mom's Underscore Bad choices if you have any, like you said, course stories, you can d m us, or you can email us, or you can actually can go our web.

That's not only where we get all our message. Oh yeah, we gotta go to our website, Good Bumps, Bad Choices dot com. And then you can just write on our contact sheet or you can d m us whatever's easier, like just reach out, send a pigeon, send us some pictures or something.

You know, keep it fun, keep it fun, Send we love news. Oh no, oh no, we're so bad our same boo. Anyway, we just show our boobs. Okay, I guess that's good night, night by bye, follows dude began, that's the way it is.

Playing say play fun play.

He didn't think shot it ou