I Love a Goofy Criminal
Happy New Year, Lovers! 1st episode of 2023 has some NYE ritual talk, a Polar Plunge and Birthday to remember Enjoy and Share with yer pals xoxo Jess
Jan 03, 2023•33 min
GET WOOD comedy
Get Wood is a weekly audio diary from your pal - comedian Jess Wood - Born to Hippies, Raised by Gangs
GET WOOD is funny, deep, and positive, even if Jess uses the f word a lot; Her personal stories mixed with humor+ authenticity & brings Jess' audience laughs as well as a rando movie/show review pushed in.
Get Wood is your pal Jess and that means always a good time and yes, she's quite EXPLICIT
xoxo
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Episodes
Witch Jail
hello lovers, twas a really silly fun show this week-and I know I needed it...Arrested for GTA in my bikini! SAG card from Hill Street Blues! Kosher Sushi and more!!! Make sure you follow on IG @GetWood and youtube jesswood69 xoxoxoxo Jess
Dec 27, 2022•35 min
Chappy Chanukkah
Hey Lovers, a buncha holiday goodies is what this show is made of: Dancin' at Dollar Tree, Gallery Show on Shrooms, F*ck Trish and more ! #hannukah #holiday #truefunnystories #tiktokdances
Dec 20, 2022•34 min
The Most Traumatic Time of the Year
Hey Lovers, such a fun show today tellin' the story of my Junkie-Stick-Up-Kid BF Jail Visit for XMAS, Tales of The Dangerous Barbie Bubblebath and a little teaser for next weeks show about Acid on XMAS eve...have a great week and be gentle with yourselves xoxoxo Jess
Dec 13, 2022•32 min
Bing Bong and a Botanica
Loverss, what fun it was to ride today and have stories that did sleigh; WTF's the irs do again? Mermaid Ave adventures featuring Bing Bong himself Mr Gorilla Nems and a LIVE viewing of his new show 'We Outside!" Leave a review and 5 stars for me if you'd be so kind. Take it slow bbs xoxo Jess
Dec 06, 2022•38 min
Balenciaga Bondage Bears for Xmas
Balenciaga Bondage Bears seem like a perfect gift for the holidays...JK JK...unless you're into it. I'm ranting about how there's too much shame in our culture and bondage is fine if we're all consenting...adults...oh, yea well. Also on my chopping block is the sexualization of a couple "Raven-Haired Beauties" who robbed a woman on the subway platform the other day, even though I do feel the robbery itself just might get some rents down. On TV I review some streaming shows that've been soothing ...
Nov 29, 2022•31 min
My Mom Hates Thanksgiving
Holidays make a lot of us crazy, and Mama El always spoke her mind about them...I relate her thoughts here....actually? She just shows up unannounced as usual. I also tell the story about me having Sex with the Special Ed TA and a few more random things-between me coughing- OY! Apologies ahead of time Grateful for you xoxo Jess
Nov 25, 2022•18 min
Vabbing LIVE!
Have YOU Vabbed? It's not as weird as people say, I even give an example...shame-free and funny! Get Wood also believes it's ok and encouraged even to ASK FOR HELP when feelin' funky....c'mon, we've all been through a group truama, let's practice being nice to ourselves and one another...also? Who's SOLD their CLOTHES? 2nd Ave Old New York = Detachable Penis #kingmissle #eastvillagenyc #vabbingtrend
Nov 15, 2022•35 min
Celebrity Ghosts & Baba Yaga
hey loverrs, t's been a learning kinda week for me-eclipse and all....Shrooms n stage time, NYC subways stories, Weeds not workin and more fun
Nov 08, 2022•33 min
Russian Laughter and more wild tales
Hey lovers, happy Tuesday. Today's show - in honor of Dia De Los Muertos - spirit took over this episode ... no idea what went down, so hopefully you'll find it entertaining...past halloween scares, what makes Ukrainian folks giggle, and much more !
Nov 01, 2022•31 min
Metal in my Cooch
Another wild week of stories; personal and from the news; I give an example of VABBING, This years' Halloween Costume, Rocky Horror Fluidity and much more fun and deep talk. Thanks for hangin out with me hope you enjoy xoxoxo Jess #getwwodpodcast #vabbing #screammasks
Oct 25, 2022•38 min
Acid on a Monday
Hey lovers, what a fun ep this week ! I chat about how we know it's Fall in NYC, Shrooms Never Lie, Horror Movies past and more ...
Oct 18, 2022•33 min
Raygun or Vibrator
Hey Lovers, whatta fun show today. I really wanna bring back the Newleywed Game LIVE and in person ! We gotta LOVE our body parts more ! Blowys at The Plaza and more things to make ya thin-gle (that's think n tingle and it's mine...thank you very much) Have some fun this week I'll C U Next Tuesday ;() xoxox Jess
Oct 11, 2022•32 min
BANNED 4 Tatas
Banned for beautiful boobs, but Dahmer is #1 in the sreaming world? I didn't buy a Banksy ! Breadcrumbing vs Gaslighting and didju know Women STILL get cometitive over Men ? Plus more goodies to grin at
Oct 04, 2022•37 min
Latin Queens & Real Estate Porn
hey lovers, another week of wildin out and gathering goodies to chat about: Ima spicy PUMPKIN bitch and proud ! bad movies that influenced us as girls---- PURPLE RAIN or BRINGIN DOWN THE HOUSE ? Mabon Blessings, La Shana Tovah and much more
Sep 27, 2022•37 min
Porn = Politics
hey lovers, a brand new episode is up and ready for ya ! *we're all black *elvis movie review *coney island usa and more ! subscribe & share xoxox thanks jess
Sep 20, 2022•32 min
Vahina Bookends & BYRON!
Lovers, I'm ranting today for real...Celebbrity Sighting in Coney Island "BYRON!" BingBong! Kim K & Ray J = BORING ASS SEX TAPE! The Queen can suc it, and more goodies to giggle at
Sep 13, 2022•31 min
Ariel, You Can't Swim!
and more hilarious dialouge from the city so nice they named it twice: New York, New York! Back To School Rituals from the 1900's, Special Ed, UZI's and why they're weren't as many school shootings...Did GANGS keep it safer? I used to love to Huff Paint at a party and yes, I'm very grateful to be here SUBSCRIBE & SHARE xoxoxox Jess #gangs #schools #backtoschool #huffingpaint #uzi #nwa #specialed
Sep 06, 2022•35 min
She's Jewish, ya know
This weeks episode goes from noise to intimacy in a little less than 30 minutes...Bushwick Renovated, MSG & Chinese Food, Do They Mean It?--Issues around trust and love...my auntie doesn't think I got any color...and more funny fun
Aug 30, 2022•33 min
No Sleep til Brooklyn
I'm back, baby! And I'm in Coney muthafuckin Island!!! This episode takes ya on the adventures from New Mex to New York with wild ass characters included! Russians! Natives! Jewish! FUN FUN mutha. Enjoy the ep and share with your pals xoxoxoxo Jess $$$$$$$$ Cashapp $getjesswood $$$$$$$$$$$$$ Venmo @ Jess-Wood-10 $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
Aug 23, 2022•32 min
Last Exit to 'Burque
Hey Lovers, this here's my final episode from Albuquerque and in it I'm recalling some of my favorite adventures, people and sights: Mama Z, James and the Giant Shot, Ghost Cats, Comedy Family and more good stuff. Share & Support $$$$$ Cashapp $getjesswood $$$$$$$$$ Venmo @Jess-Wood-10 xoxoxo Jess
Aug 16, 2022•38 min
Hopelessly Devoted to Nudes
RIP Olivia Newton John and my spandex pants. RIP Motown songwriter Lamont Dezier, Cheeto Got Busted, Lions Gate Portal, an amazing farewell show at the Dry Heat Comedy Club and more talk about self-care 'n' shiz. $$$$$$$$$$$ Cashapp $getjesswood $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ Venmo @ Jess-Wood-10 take care of yourselves loves xoxo Jess #olivianewtonjohn #lamontdozier #maralago #fbiraid #nudes
Aug 09, 2022•32 min
No Shame Titties
Hey Lovers, thanks for being with me today! I chatted about Freemoney the Great, Hooker Shoes, Otter Pops and so much more good stuff to make ya laugh, you'll be grateful ya tuned in...promise...Are ya in Albuquerque? Come see me LIVE Sunday 8/7 @ Dry Heat Comedy Club !!! Share and Subscribe Thanks BooBoos xoxoxo Jess
Aug 02, 2022•32 min
Classical Music Scares Homeless
It's TRUE in Albuquerque the stores blast classical and opera outside to keep people from hanging out! I'm also cahtting about 1981 Top Songs and how diverse they were, but we took it for granted. 5 Tittie Review for The Grey Man on Netflix and lots more fun SHARE & SUBSCRIBE thaks loves, xoxox Jess #funnypodcasts #hilariouslady #getwoodpodcast #truestories
Jul 26, 2022•37 min
Get in the Van
Hey Lovers, what a great show today chatting about bicycle accidents & adventures, white man wit a van, and how to build a community by just being yourself...plus more silly shiz. Share with your pals and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform Thanks xoxoxo Jess #funnypodcasts #comedyshow #funnylady
Jul 19, 2022•33 min
Moist Tattoos
Lovers, this week was filled with self discovery, hot men and moldy ceilings. Have a listen a laugh and a like ! #tattoos #nmtattoofiesta #mold #selfhelp #bone #arthouse #sexslaves Feelin frisky? Cashapp $getjesswood Venmo @ Jess-Wood-10 xoxoxo Jess
Jul 12, 2022•33 min
R. Kelly vs Ghislaine
Ghosts, Ghislaine, and Gurus all in one fun episode ! #rkelly #gmaxwell #ghosts #gurus What a week! Enjoy and share the show with your friends Thanks xoxox Jess
Jul 07, 2022•38 min
My Mamas Pro-Choice
Pro-Choice Mama and a trip to the abortion clinic are just a couple fun stories today on Mama's birthday! Also includes some fun comedy information, me being a spiritual gangster and a lot of hilarious in between. #prochoice #abortionrights #humanrights #comedyshow #hahahahaha #lol #truestories #mama #funnyshow #comedypodcasts
Jun 28, 2022•32 min
Queen Bee
Hey Lovers, it's another week of wild stories! I took a #traumadump on a friend-I don't recommend it... #INTUITIVELY knowing what the dude's gonna say....RUSSIAN TEENS at a baseball game in #coneyisland, aand much more fun. SHARE with your friends xoxox Jess
Jun 21, 2022•41 min
I'm Brave ?
Lovers, I was so blessed to open for Tommy Davidson last week! Afterwards lotsa people told me I was "Brave." Brave? I'm breaking it down and makin it funny...Didju know Cardi B LOVES the Roosevelts? Dry Heat Comedy Club opens next Thursday and I get to headline the first show of the first night of the first comedy club (in a long time) in Albuquerque ! There's a lil spot where tears come cuz I talk about Mama, but all in all----whatta fun show ! Enjoy and share with your pals xoxox Jess...
Jun 14, 2022•35 min
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