Tips for Being More Intentional with your Finances w/Alyssa from Mixed Up Money

My name is Jen, this is Jill, and today we're talking about the value of putting pencil to paper and being more intentional with your finances, not just the numbers, but everything that surrounds finances, emotions, mindsets, your future, everything. So we're excited to have author and blogger Alyssa Davies on with us today. She is the mastermind behind Mixed Up Money, which is an award winning Canadian finance blog

for all Canadian listeners. Check her out um and she's also the author of the one hundred Day Financial Goald journal. So excited to speak with her, But first our sponsors. Today's episodes also brought to you by Dalmatians, the sleek athletic dog breed and star of Disney's one hundred one Dalmatians. These dogs are intelligent, playful, and typically non aggressive, their patient and generally good with children as well. That's why it's reasonable to keep one one of them as pets.

We had two Dalmatians growing up, actually one with Sapphire because she had blue eyes, and the other was Chaka because she had chocolate brown spots. Two was too many for me Dalmatians that which is why it's reasonable to have one of them has pets. And if you're like not a pet person would like me. And then it's like we're moving from a frugal podcast to information on dog breeds. The Dalmatians wanted you to know why they are attractive dog breed because you don't see them a

lot anymore. Well, also because this is episode one oh one, one hundred and one, just like one hundred and one Dalmatians and we everyone will own Now, we were going to offer you a hundred one tips on how to be intentional with your finances, but we couldn't get past four. And also four is all you want? Yeah, that's really all you need. Uh. So Alyssa is going to chat with us about ways to be intentional h and how you can put pencil to paper to solidify that intentionality. So,

without further ado, here's Alyssa Davies. Alyssa, Well, welcome to the show. Thanks so much for coming on, Thanks for having me. I'm excited to chat with you ladies. Yeah, and we're excited for your your journal that's coming out. It's really thought provoking and we love it whenever you give somebody a reason to really dig deep and think about their finances, not just you know, the surface level stuff like I need to pay off debt, I need to save more, but like really getting into like why

we have the goals that we have and stuff. So super excited to pick your brain a little bit on ways we can be more intentional for sure for starters, Alyssa, can you tell us a little bit about how you got started in writing in this financial space, Like what what prompted that for you? There is always something that prompts people. Hey, no one just wants to write about money for fun. Ever since I was three, I just wanted to talk about money. I just love budgeting. Yeah.

I started actually five years ago. Now I've been blogging for five years already. It's crazy. Um, I was in a ton of consumer debt. Nothing new, it's kind of the same old story. But I had just recently gotten engaged and I was still in school and I realized, Okay, how am I supposed to pay for a wedding when I'm carrying around all of this debt? And is this exactly how I want to enter into a new part

of my life? Probably not. So Yeah, I sat down and I started mapping out all of the debt that I owed and made a plan as to what I was going to do. And I was like, maybe I should start a blog so that I can hold myself more accountable. And when I started to look into it, there was so many out there that I realized, Oh, this is a real thing that people do, and I think this is a great community that I should start getting involved in if I'm going to start taking this seriously.

So that's how I started, and I'm so glad I did. That's amazing when I hear people, I mean, it's kind of a crossroads that you're describing that you were at of shifting in life a little bit, and it can prompt us to reevaluate other aspects of our life. But it doesn't always. Some people just zoom right past, like continue status quo or continue how they've been doing things.

But it's really neat to hear you describe this big thing that was happening in my life did prompt me to look at is this the way I want to keep going? Or do I want to make some shifts, maybe even some course corrections. So that that's amazing. I think in that a really helpful tip for people to utilize those crossroads moments in life to evaluate other aspects of life, because certainly that's going to enter into a marriage or a new home or new bringing new child

into the world. Like, if you don't make changes, what you're doing already will just continue to perpetuate. Yeah, and it'll add more stress, which is the last thing you want, especially with the cute little bundle of baby that you have. Oh do you you since here right there in the video not like her, She's not like here, but like if you're watching a YouTube, you can see a little

picture picture right there. Nice. Okay, sorry, just like to let our podcasts for so, so let's get into a few ways that we can be more intentional with our money.

What's the first way that you recommend? I think it comes down to just making a goal, but also knowing the difference between what setting a goal is and what being intentional is, because there is a difference so goal setting it kind of looks at the future and understanding what you want, how you can create a plan, and what you can do to stay on track with that goal.

But setting an intention is more the way to focus on who you are in that moment and just understanding what you want to you with your money and what your values are when it comes to money. Yeah, definitely, Yeah, I like that distinction. I love the smart goal um framework, but I think sometimes it can be limiting. I think there is this difference between like specific and achievable goals and then maybe going further than you thought you could.

So I think there's a lot of room to take smart goals to the next level by setting like a stretch goal. But I do think goals are the way that we get moving with our finances, and setting them

can be can be really intentional. Yeah. And then if your parent to, like I know that's a huge thing for me, is I have so much on my mind all the time that I'm just often going through the motions, especially during a tough week like last week, my kid was sick, so I had to go to the grocery store like several times just to pick up up whether it was distilled water for a humidifier or just all these things and you just are kind of a zombie.

So you just start picking stuff up. I'm putting in your car, and you're not thinking about what you're buying until a week later and you're like, Wow, my grocery budgets way over board this month because I just wasn't being intentional when I was walking through the grocery store and I forgot what my intentions were with my money this month. Oh that's amazing. Again. I love that distinction

of what are your intentions? It's it can kind of shift that perspective, like you said, from just calling something a goal. There's so much content out there on it that we can get bogged down with. Man, what does that even mean? Or is that even for me? Is that how I approach life? But to say, what are my intentions this today or this week or this month? And what am I doing to get at those intentions?

So along these lines with talking about intentional spending, care to share I know you've got or tips on this. What is your second um? One of the things that I like to do personally when it comes to goal setting and just making sure that your on track with your money is actually doing the not so fun part, which is tracking your spending. I know a lot of people don't like to do it because it's a lot of work and it can be a really real look

into what you're doing with your money. But it's really necessary if you want to make progress and start to get an understanding of what you do with your money. Yeah, for sure, what are some ways that you've tracked spending? Like how if someone's like, what does that even mean? How do you start with that? Yeah? So usually I just write down, Like that's how I like to do things. Is I like to write them down? Um? So I just have a pen and paper and I write down

everything I buy in a single day. Um. But you can also use a spreadsheet that you can update daily or weekly. It doesn't have to be every single day because that can be quite the task if you're busy. Or you can use a budgeting app like Cleo is one that I like, Or you can use Mint or there's lots out there that are available. Um but it's not something I use just because I find it's less likely to keep you accountable because it's all automatic and

you're not really being mindful. But that's an option. And another way to do it is just keeping all of your receipts um and just making sure that you know where you spend all of your money, and then you just want to sit down and follow up with your bank statements month to month to just to see how much it is to make sure you didn't miss anything.

But yeah, it's it's essentially just tracking every single penny you spend, sitting down and going through all of those expenses and saying, oh, wow, this is actually how much I spend in a month. What my budget says, this is what I'm spending. Yeah, yeah, And where would you find pen and pencil and paper? Where would you what would you find that in? I love what you're saying, but where do I get pencil and paper? Yeah? Previous sponsors.

And this, I feel like is one of the most low hanging fruits with learning to be intentional with money, to budget, to learn where our money is going, how we're approaching it. But for some reason we just don't do it. We may even sit down and write a budget, but then have no idea if like that's like fantasy versus reality, right of Like I say that this is how much like I say that I spend three hundred dollars on groceries, I spend six hundred. Let's be honest,

her tiny fridge. I'll never know, well because my grocery budget includes going out to eat, so anyhow. But yeah, but anyhow, tracking spending is really where I learned what's the reality. And if I don't want that to be the reality, how do I rein that? In Like, we want to jump to the thing that saves us money, but we have to know what we're doing first before we can jump there. So I love that tip, and I think, uh, this is another thing I think forming a habit out of It's not like one you do

it one time and you're done. This has to be a regular thing. Yeah, yeah, and it doesn't have to be a forever thing to Like I like to tell people, you know, just try tracking your spending for three to six months, because that will actually give you a really good idea that just because how we spend each week is really hard to estimate, like you said, so just giving yourself a good reasonable time frames so that you're

more aware is really important. Yeah. Set, Yeah, to set a time frame so you know, okay, it ends now, So if I can just keep going for four more weeks, three more weeks, then you'll do it more consistently than

if it's just open ended exactly. And I also like, maybe if you can't do it every day because maybe your life is unpredictable or you go NonStop at night, then just joel in an hour every other day or three days a week, like a Monday, Wednesday, Friday, so that you can keep track of everything still a few

times a week. You want to do it more than once a week, but you're scheduling in that thirty minutes three times a week, and then it doesn't feel so overwhelming like I have to do it seven days a week. Even when you just say that, it's like, Okay, that's that's attainable. We can manage that. Yeah, just make it more attainable. So we've got creating a goal tracking spending so that we can reach that goal. What is another tip you've got for us? Well, when it comes to money,

you have to save it. What you are saying crazy things? Next? Yeah, so just finding a way to save money each week. So in my journal, it's actually like how you can save for a financial goal that's in a hundred days. So when you think about it that way, it's like, what can I actually afford to save each day if I only have a hundred days? Um? So that's kind of how I like to look at my financial goals.

I've always done that. If it's like you're planning a trip to Disneyland next year, you have three d sixty five days, you want to save five thousand dollars? How many? How much is that each day? Yeah, because it makes it a little bit more realistic, and it kind of sets the tone for what you actually need to save. Um And Yeah, So to do stuff like that, like to save money each week, you have to do a

lot of smaller things. So that really gets in. Like when we were having our how to Transition from Spender to Saver episode, how to build like a habit of saving. You have to do it intentionally. You can't just set up the auto debit and expect to become a saver in your heart. But doing something like this, it's finite.

It's a hundred days, and you're doing it every day, or even like if you're just tracking your transactions every other day or three times a week, you're at least doing it three to four times a week, and that is more than enough to build a habit. I think what you're communicating is so great because it speaks to an understanding of humanity that, yes, ideally each year we could put thousands of dollars towards various savings goals, but

reality is we don't function that way. We do far better with these small incremental breaking it down, what does this mean for me on a daily weekly basis than we do with the like quarterly annually kind of approach. So yeah, in theory you could, but we don't usually function well with those kind of parameters. So to say break it down to a hundred days, what does that

mean daily? My goodness, You're so much more likely to attain that thing if you're being into channel in that way, because it's it's the it's then becoming part of a routine, which becomes a habit, and yeah, yeah, makes more successful in that area. Okay, saving money, that is an intentionally saving So that's our that's the key takeaway from this

one intentionally doing it? Um, what's our last one? The last one is just taking time to actually reflect on your behaviors and the habits that you do have with your money, and so what I mean by that is just actually taking the time to sit down and reflect on how you did with your money each week, how it made you feel, and why you chose to spend the money you chose to spend, or why you chose to take a step back and not spend that money.

Just again thinking about the intentions that you had, and just listening to what you're doing with your finances, because I find journaling has been a huge difference make or for me when it comes to my finances. I'm way more aware of how money makes me feel and how it impacts the decisions that I make. And then it also helped with the goal setting side of things. Amazing, You're blowing my mind a little bit. Journaling about your finances tell me more. Yeah, so I just kind of track.

I do it daily, which is a lot, but if you do have a short term goal, you kind of need to do it that frequently. You know, how am I feeling today in the morning, and then is that going to impact my money for the rest of the day, Because if I'm in a bad mood or I didn't have a good sleep, I'm probably going to go to a coffee shop and buy a coffee, like there's no

stopping me. Um, And so just being aware of the fact that today might not be a great day for my money, so I need to be way more mindful of that and then or if it's a great day, then I know I don't have anything to worry about and I can just go through the motions and feel good about my money that day. Wow, this is amazing. I think we often think about journaling for you know, dear diary, what happened in relationships today, or yeah, mental health,

just how my feeling and then it stops there. But my goodness, what a good practice to say, and how will this impact my behaviors? Which is so true. I mean, I'm I'm a therapist, and so like we talk about how behaviors start first at the thought level. Thoughts lead to feelings lead to behaviors, and if we can catch it at the thought and feeling level, we can shift

what our behaviors are out of that scenario. And and but it sounds like too, you're even giving yourself a bit of permission and planning that sometimes I'm not going to be in the best mind space for my finances and that there are times when that's okay because there's an awareness of it. I don't am I reading between the lines too much. I know that's absolutely how I feel. Um. I know that I'm not perfect when it comes to money. I wish I was. UM. I try to be really frugal.

That's part of just my upbringing and who I've decided to be with my money. But it's not always easy to say no, it's perfect, you're not alone. Yeah yeah, yeah, and especially like since I had a kid, man, I it's all about coffee and just taking a break, whether that was an hour away from the house or an hour just sitting alone in my office. It's it's what you need. Yeah, yeah, and yeah. I think this is especially important for people who don't like to talk about

finances um out loud. I think you need to have some outlet to process. There can be like a lot of grief and shame and anxiety around money, and you need a way to process it. And if you're not going to go to a therapist, if you're not to talk to your friends about it, then you can do it privately, like with some kind of guided journal. Um. And it's it can be the first step to like healing um and re rethinking, reforming the way you think

about finances. But I love that this is in the top four for you in saying that this is part of the process. I think we can so quickly like skip by this reflection piece and whether we journal about that or we just sit and reflect and think about, well, what does this mean as we look over our budget and our finances and and where do my values lie? And do I want to make any shifts and changes? I think we can just fly past all of that, like, all right, I did my budget and did my savings.

I'm being intentional but never stopping to say, and is this working? And do I want to continue? Or what am I learning about myself? Like taking that to the deeper level of who who am I? As a result of what I see my finances? I mean that there's quotes out there right about like show me your your bank account statement, and I'll tell you what you value. I'll tell you where your priorities are. Like, certainly we're going to put our money where our true priorities are.

And if they're not there, then then let's shift that. Or that's not actually what we want to be a priority, then let's shift that that's only going to happen by reflecting and looking back and identifying these things. Mine was so emotional, oh for sure. Yeah, and we forget that it's linked to those aspects of our personhood. We think it's separate. We think it's uh, this stale kind of um business e thing. But yeah, it is wrapped up

in relationships and emotions and everything. You know what else is the bill of the week. That's right, it's toime for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage, maybe your car died and you're happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That's built buffalo bills, Bill Clinton, this is the bill of the week, Alyssa. Every week we invite our listeners or our guests to share with us their favorite bill, any

bill with us on the show. Do you have a bill for us? Yes? I do. I have my mortgage. WHOA, that's a bill for sure, a bill. I actually bought a house. It's we've been here for about seven months now, um, and every single time I pay the mortgage, I I'm happy about it, which is something not a lot of people are happy about. But it just makes me feel good because we accomplished a goal that we were really

excited about. You have a permanent place to build memories as a family, and I feel like I've done what I wanted to do with my money and now I can just enjoy that. Oh that's lovely. I also love my mortgage. It's like way more than I ever paid in rent and I don't even think twice about it because I love our house well. And you can also know that you're investing in something like, yeah, you're paying for a place to live currently, but it also is

building the potential wealth for you to Yeah. For us, it's all about just having like a safe space for a family and knowing that we don't have to go anywhere. Yeah, and yeah, that's just a huge thing for me. Is I was always a renter and as soon as we moved in here, I was like, is this real? I can hang a picture and I don't have to worry about it I have to call the landlord. Right if you're just hanging pictures where wherever I want, I can

see you've done that. It looks tasteful. You're good. If you guys have a bill for us, whether it's your mortgage or whatever. Please visit Frugal Friends podcast dot com, slash bill and leave us a voicemail or speak pipe and let us celebrate with you nice. And now it's time for Lightning Round. You always go so much softer and sweeter than I do, because I've always felt so intimidated by the lightning round. It comes on and I'm

just like too much in your ears. It is. So today for the Lightning Round, we wanted to continue the conversation about journaling. So we're going to go through how we value the significance of putting pencil to paper when dealing with your finances. And so we're each going to share different valuable tidbit insight, feeling something, our thoughts on why that's important because it affected us individually, because you, Alissa,

have done and have written a one day financial goal journal. Uh, and so the value of a kind of workbook process rather than just hearing about something but this pencil to paper. So we'll let you go first because you're our guests. Um, what do you see of the value of Yeah, like we said, putting pencil to paper. Yeah. For for me, it's it's about the actual accountability aspect, because if I just say I'm going to do something, I won't do it. Um, So I have to have something actually that I can

hold and feel and kind of move through that. And the journal has been a way to talk about the bad times with my money, because there's always going to be bad times. But it's also a really great place to go and celebrate your personal successes with money, because I don't want to always run to my friends and talk about I'm doing so great financially if maybe they're

not in the same spot. So it's really a good place for me to kind of give myself a pat on the back for doing what I want to do with my money and reaching that milestone every single time I get closer to accomplishing a goal, um, and just it's like a memory, like you can go back and be like, Wow, look at what I've accomplished with my money, and if I can do that, then there's way more

I can do. Yeah, And having written those things down allows you to go back, which can even be an encouragement when there are times that you're feeling like I can't get this right or I'm not doing things like I used to and realize the ebbs and those of it in the past, and how it is possible to be back in a place of doing Well, what about

for you, Jim? So for me, I do so much work on the computer that the computer for me is like something text and PDF and stuff are things that I skim while like books and things that I hold, I really go through. And so for me, the value of actually writing through something i'm processing it allows me to be that much more intentional about it. Um. But it forced me to not skip any questions, Like I

go through each one line by line. Um. When I'm scrolling, it's easy to just scroll on by, but if it's there in front of me on the paper, it doesn't scroll. It's there until I answer it, So that that would be for me it. Yeah, there is something really important

about the tangible, and same thing with journaling. There there's something that happens when our minds and like what's happening in our brain gets to connect with our physical body, and I think more understanding comes through that process, more awareness comes through that process, more insight all these things. I don't know all the science behind it. I just know that it's true. So yeah, um, for me, when it comes to work books or putting pencil to paper

for just my own tracking spending or budgeting. I I like it because because of the walking through a process, I think, when things can feel so jumbled, it's really helpful for me to be able to be guided through something, which is which is what a workbook provides of, here's where to start, here's the middle, here's the end, and and it it helps to just bring clarity to something, um and and then to be able to see it

all at once. I think, Yeah, similar to what you're saying, there's something really helpful about the tangible, specifically when it comes to tracking my spending. I'll take it even further than the pencil and paper and pull in the highlighters, get real crazy with it. But yeah, also and like break it up into different categories so then I can see, like, all right, if yellow is all the highlighted food and blue is gas and whatever, like, I can kind of see where is the most of my money going to.

And then there's something just therapeutic about having done that with my hands. So the process of it is um rewarding for me. Yeah, well, we hope that you guys will take that to heart and do something that puts pencil to paper. And unless I know that you specifically your book is coming out, tell us a little bit more about it. Things you have like already covered everything that we covered. Actually those four pieces of intentionality, those are all questions in your book that you have people

go through. Yeah, so it's, um, it's a hundred days that you pick a goal. You actually get to know how you set a goal, how you choose a goal, why you're choosing that goal, and then every single day it gives you an opportunity to reflect on your spending habits and why you did the things you did. And then you also have the opportunity to learn a little bit of a lesson every single week so that you have something to focus on every week and so that

it's not the same thing. So it's moving along with you. Um, it's like you said, there's a beginning, of middle and an end, and you'll be able to check in with yourself to make sure that you're on the right page so that you're not halfway through and you're like, I'm not going to accomplish this goal, so what's the next step. Yeah, that's awesome. Where can we get more from you? A Lissa. If people want this book, if they want to read

more of your content, for sure. So the book is available for preorder right now, but it actually comes out on April seven, so mark your calendars and you can get that on Bards and Noble dot com or Amazon. It's available, and you can find me on Mixed Up Money dot com and all of my informations there. So if you want to follow me on social media or anything, you can head there and get all the links you need. And Melissa draws the cutest, greatest drawings on Instagram. You

actually have to follow her. It's a requirement. It's Mixed Up Money. You will not be sorry. They're so amateur, but I have so much fun doing Absolutely love them for all of their character. I love them. You gotta have fun with this process. Yeah, well thanks so listen for coming on and sharing your wisdom in your book with us, and we are super super looking forward to it coming out and uh maybe putting some more pencil to paper in our own finances. Yes on twenty year

of papers and pens. Yeah, having it, I mean, I'm here for it. Get back to the basics. Amazing, I mean, so just tangible tips, I love it when we can break things down into digestible information. I love it when I think that an interview is going to go one way and then it actually goes another way. That's like much more uh not just like profound, but like much more tangible, like with more tangible tips and things that I can get out of it. So I loved it.

Journaling about finances is going to stick with me? Sure al Right, guys, So we are wrapping up, and as you know, we just want to keep thinking you all for the ways that you are listening and engaging with this content. And one of the ways we want to thank you is by reading a kind review that that we found, because they all get emailed to us, so we read all of them, but we highlight the kind ones. So this one is from Claries, she says, awesome podcast.

Jen and Jill, host of the Frugal Friends podcast, highlights all aspects of business investing and more. In this can't miss podcast, the host and expert guests offer insightful advice and information that is helpful to anyone that listens. Thanks so much. Clary's like what kind words to say? Yes, thank you so much. So we we always thank our listeners that leave us a review. But we also want to thank our listeners who share us on social media.

That is a big way that people find out about us, and so we just want to thank you by including you in our monthly giveaway. So we want to include that on our Amazon gift card giveaway by looking at how you tag us. So tag our latest episode this week on Facebook or Instagram and you will be entered into that drawing. Well, we'll give one winner a gift card for every five tags or reviews we get at

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Who should we quit now? Yep? Bye, getting out of here. I got dalmatians to take care of dalmatians, freaking So yeah, that's what I'm gonna do. I can't do a podcast anymore. Going to feed the Dalmatians