Episode four ninety three is Episode two ninety two, The science behind how simplicity impacts your money.
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity, and liver a your life. Here your hosts Jen and Jill.
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen, my name is Jill, and today we are talking about simplicity and how it impacts your money Cognitively. We have talked about minimalism and how that kind of affects your finances physically and mentally, and so today's is about simplicity.
We love talking about simplicity.
We do.
Many of our episodes are about this, and rather than just record another episode, we figured we just play you an oldie but a goodie.
This is one of our most popular episodes from twenty twenty three, and since so many people loved it, then we say why create recreate the way?
Because here's the thing. Our cognitive bias towards complexity will continue to be there. So to be encouraged and motivated towards simplicity. To choose simplicity, we're going to need to keep having those reminders. Otherwise we're going to keep choosing complicated and chaotic.
But before we get too deep in the weeds and make this introduction too complex, this episode is brought to you by studies. Studies show the people who piecemeal information from various sources can be successful, but they are typically more stressed. Anecdotal evidence shows that getting step by step information from a trusted source makes learning much easier and enjoyable. In cite Frugal The Journal of Frugal Friends twenty five, that's why we want to create a simple and affordable,
comprehensive frugal personal finance course. That sounded like a complicated way to say, we want to make a personal finance course that centers around the five pillars of frugality, so good stewardship of your money, time, physical spaces and natural resources, and number five your food. So this personal finance course is now in pre order and we are gauging interest to see if this is something you want and also
to see how you want it. Do you want more of an education on frugality or do you want more of an education on the perferal things around personal finance like retirement, investing, insurance with a more frugal slant to all of them, and so we're going to design the course around the people who buy it in pre order. It is available for pre order for one more week. You can get more information and pre order at Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash frugal Home.
Super excited about this. I think it's a way we can simplify values based spending for people.
Yeah, and it goes. It's essentially if you've read our book by what you Love without going broke, this would be the next step. So we're going to have next steps on the podcast. But we wanted to create something that is not piecemeal, that is step by step and enjoyable from a trusted source.
But let's get into this podcast episode.
Yes, let's not waste any more time. If you're looking for a good episode to queue up afterwards, Episode four sixty two about willpower and self control. Also the recent one we just did about minimalism and your financial wellness. Very good ones to q Okay, let's get into it.
This first article comes from happiness dot com and gives us six reasons that simplicity is beneficial, like six key benefits of simplifying your life, and we're going to go through all six. I think I agree with all of them.
Wow, I know that's great. Yeah, yeah, that's very rare that we agree with all of the ones on a list, so good job Happiness dot Com, I too agree with them. So the first one is to simplify, to learn more about yourself. So when we did our spending makeover live in January, one, if not the hardest thing everyone said was actually figuring out your core values. And we think finding what you value is essential to spending money on things you love and saying no to the things that
you don't, and that really that is really hard. It's a simple thing to say, it's an easy thing to say, but when you are so used to focusing on other people and other things, it can be hard to focus on yourself in the ways that it matters. And so when you simplify, you really do give yourself more space to learn about yourself and to learn about those values
and develop values based spending. We were when I was researching for this episode, I found an article on Psychology Today that wasn't like a list, so it wasn't really great for the purposes of the show, but it was like of a woman who is Jewish by heritage, but not by practice, and decided one weekend that they would her and her son would observe the sabbath, like the
tradition told you a sabbath that has gosh. I think she said, like fifty different rules, and she's like, I never observed it because the rules seemed so restrictive and just seemed like deprivation. And what she found when she followed all these rules, they were essentially forcing her to simplify.
It was forced simplification, and it almost felt indulgent, and that she had the space where her mind would normally just go to her phone, or if she had a question, it would go to Google, or she would call her mom, like all these things that she normally used to distract her brain. She had to just sit with herself.
Yeah. I don't think we often give ourselves the space to do that, and we don't have to. There is so much that can take up our capacities and energy and attention. And there is something within at least American culture, of a hierarchy of value. The busier you are. I think there's a lot of movements pushing against that, but
it's still ingrained in us. Like if you're busy, that means you're important, and so that what that then does and can lead to is not much time for process or reflection or enjoying the simple things in life, the beauties that are all around. But it's so much stress, overwhelmed, fatigue. But then we just keep keep going without even thinking about, well, what's causing this and what could shift and what do
I actually want? And I really appreciated how the author pointed out too in the beginning, before they even got into these six steps, just what they're noticing this in themselves as they age, which I can relate to as I'm getting older, I think that there is this draw pull attraction to wanting less, wanting opportunities to exhale, wanting to know more about myself, the environment in which I can from which I think you also see like a lot of people leaning into figuring out their ancestry or
being more interested in the culture in which they came from, which I think is a really beautiful process that can happen as we age. I also like how they reference this aim at simplicity. It's not new. This is one of those ancient paths that many religious groups and cultures will follow, like from the monastic orders in the Middle Ages to modern day Amish people or Quakers. The simple living, the simple life is essential to some of these practices, and you know, we can take what works for us
and leave behind what doesn't. But I think it's also really interesting and helpful to recognize that there are some practices that humanity has engaged with over the decades and centuries that is just good for humans. And so when we talk about simplicity, it's across the board of schedule and within our lives and just creating space to exhale. So all of that said, there's like, there's so much
foundation I think to lay here. But then the so now skipping to number two, that a simpler lifestyle what we're talking about here, can lead to improved relationships, and they reference an essay by Amy Tai at Zioli. You were voluntary simplicity is what this essay is about, and how in that quest to push against the acquiring of material possessions, we are often more likely to focus on relationships.
And so when spending excessive time on social media, being occupied just being by being busy, oftentimes our relationships those actually around us can suffer. And so when we read do those things. It frees us up to spend more time with friends and family. But then they also reference when we give space for a pause and margin and we're experiencing more time with friends and family. It can also lead to a bit of editing of friendship groups.
I have a good friend who was recognizing in her own life kind of taking inventory and keeping a pulse on how do I feel after engaging with each of these friends shout out to Ashland. She was describing that she was starting to notice that with like some hangouts, it was leading to like anxiety afterwards, and sometimes she felt like so filled up and really like like life was poured back into her. And I know we've said
this before. It's not as if we don't have any relationships that have some form of like depletion or need surrounding them, but at least intention with very life giving relationships. But like, you're not going to create that pause unless you've got some of that curiosity and you've cleared some space for yourself to say, how did that interaction make me feel? What is this group of friends providing to me? How is this going to benefit my life? Even long term?
I think it's a great thing to be focusing on. But we're not going to be able to do that if we're just so cluttered.
Right, it's so easy, like you leave someone and you immediately will get on social media or thinking about okay, what's for dinner, what's the next thing, and we fil phil fill our heads. Yeah, every single moment that we don't give the opportunity even for like uncomfortable thoughts. Yeah, like, yeah, that's so interesting. So this next one is that simple living boosts your bank balance.
Oh more alliteration.
Yeah, so this one actually does have a study according to a UK study from twenty eighteen which question two thousand people, which one thousand is my minimum for including survey results. He said, money worries affect forty percent of
the population. And so if you simplify, And I think that article really that I that I read yesterday really made me think about the indulgence of simplicity, that we we don't want to deprive ourselves, right, and so sometimes simple living, minimalism, what have you, they are not the same thing, but they can be equated with deprivation, as can saving money, but really giving yourself over to the luxuriation of it, like all of the the indulgences that
simplification and minimalism and this stuff can provide. It just takes a mindset shift of Like this woman sitting in her house, like she got to read through so much more of a book than she would have because she's like, when I read, I think I should be writing. Because she's, you know, writing for psychology today, obviously she's like, I feel guilty and I should be writing. But when I'm you know, doing the Sabbath, I can't write, so I'm forced into further self care. Almost.
Oh that's so true. Like just to sit and listen to music feels indulgent, but there is something very simple to that, and it can clear up mind space and create rest.
Yeah, and so we when we're creating, like we're when we're focusing on the indulgences and the luxuriation of simplicity, you're.
Done with it.
I am Now we don't have to rely on spending money to fill those gaps, which we so often do when we feel like we need to treat ourselves. But there are other ways to treat yourself that almost feel like guilty. You feel guilty about yeah doing.
Yeah, Oh that's so true. Number four on here is living a simple life is great for your health, and they reference a study from twenty fourteen, which is just on the cusp of my standards for research studies that they're fifteen years older, newer, so we're right there, which
is crazy. Twenty fourteen oh Man Okay published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology where they found a link between materialism and they define that as valuing possessions and money, and they're that connection to poor physical health. And another team from Knox College in Illinois also found an even stronger link between materialism and engagement in risky behaviors that could damage physical health, like drinking, alcohol, smoking,
drug use. And so then they're kind of saying it makes sense then that in the reverse of that, having a more non materialistic attitude could lead to more positive health outcomes, which I think is wild. But I've also been thinking recently and having conversations with people about just some of the trueness. I'm making up my own word too, of that concept of more money more problems, and money isn't the issue, like it's what we do with it. But I think that there is this principle where the
more that you have, whether it's money or resources. The more responsible you are for those things, and there's a weight and a pressure, whether realized or unrealized, of what am I now going to do with these things that I've been entrusted with the goal of frugality is to
be good stewards of that. But if we've not created space for mindfulness and intentionality, I think sometimes that can lead to that subconscious, not realized weight and responsibility that leads to some of those risky behaviors like Okay, well I've got this and I'm not putting much thought into like what am I going to do with it? And this is what the world is telling me is good and helpful and will be effective and efficient for my life,
And then it leads to some of this. I mean, yeah, some of the craziest behaviors come from the wealthiest people. So there is like there is a phenomena here.
We're looking at you, old Justin Bieber.
I don't know, I'm even thinking like the billionaires. I think that there's just something too. You just have an absurd amount of money and okay, I know that, like no billionaires are like listening to our podcast, but like, you know, thinking of that on a smaller scale that the more that that's the focus of our time, energy and efforts, there is this strong link between then maybe
not making the best decisions. If our aim is just collecting everything I can possibly collect and having all the luxurious materials in my home, then that type of mentality could lead to risk your linse.
Yeah, it's the materialism mentality, not necessarily the income mentality. Exactly when I was writing my first book, The No Spend Challenge Guide, I came across a study and at this point it probably falls outside your your time limitsover we're ald, but it studied a group of people who had a lot of clutter in their homes, like border like borderline hoarders, and then just the like on the same spectrum to all to people who didn't have a
lot of things in their homes. And they found that the people who had a lot of stuff in their homes, like the spectrum kind of correlated to less emphasis on health. So the more stuff they had in their home, the less they tried to be healthy. Interesting, So that was another way that I found simplicity, like in your stuff really does help because we all know that health is wealth and Obviously being healthy does save you money in the long run too, just for practical reason.
I mean, I just don't have a lot of stuff on my own because I don't want to dust a lot.
Oh I hate cleaning. Yeah, I had to Oh my gosh, I had to change the sheets on my bed more than once in a month. And I am pregnant too, So like it was just like I can't have too many beds in this house, Like you can have too many bedrooms.
Technically, don't they say you should change your sheets every two weeks?
Okay, we had this conversation before. We don't have to hide it, we truly are we. Oh yeah, I'm like every two months. But I think the stand there. So we talked about this. You said every month, and now you're saying every two months. Fishing I'm starting.
Okay, we're getting more and more into the true.
We're gonna move on before you reveal anything else you don't want to. So number five is simplistic. Living means increased focus, which is so true. The more we have to focus on, the more we will just not focus on anything. And that's like we think we need to have all of these plates spinning at the same time. But the more you have, you're gonna focus on none of them, not even one of them, is going to get your full attention. And this is why we talk
so much about prioritizing and not trying to balance. Balance is a myth. Prioritize what's important to you, when it's important to you, change, switch it up as you need to, but prioritize focus, and that means you're probably not going to be able to work on ten things at once. So simplify your goals, simplify your schedule, your activities so that you can have reasonable priorities and be able to focus on them as needed.
And the last one on here, number six, Living a simple life helps the environment. There is a symbiotic relationship between simple living and being good stewards of the space that we take up. As we are more content and need less, we consume less, which means less waste. I
think a big industry where we consume a lot. The industry itself utilizes a ton of energy and we often throw away is fashion and clothing, and so when we are not buying so much fast fashion, then we're not contributing as much to the textile industry, which is one of the biggest polluters, and it's just it just leads to then more sustainability as we're not consuming and throwing away.
And again we've mentioned it before, it's kind to then like the we're not then taking advantage of people either, Like there's there's both the environment, there's the workers, there's all of it. Paying fair wages is a part of this equation. So there's so much interconnectedness between what benefits us also benefits others. And when we can find that beautiful intersection, what an amazing thing.
Yes, and most of these that we read out do have like studies associated with them, so if you're interested in those, definitely check out the article. It will be in our show notes.
In this next article that we're going to go through is how to Simplify your life and spend less And it came from Jen she wrote it. Yeah, you're talking about it Modern Frugality. It's her blog.
It's so I read other articles because I didn't want to be the person that uses their own article.
But I'm here for it.
It was the best one, you know, like it was and maybe it was the one that said what I wanted to say the best exactly.
So there's tons of tips in here. We're each going to go through three of our favorites, and I'm going to pick first because I feel like you've got the upper hand on this one. Oh wow.
Okay.
The first one is to declutter your home. We've already kind of identified this one already. But the less physical clutter that you have in your home, the more focused that you can have, the less you have to less time and you have to spend on maintaining and cleaning and replacing and fixing, and all of that saved time and money can lead to increased contentment, which then leads to less spending, which then leads to you being able to spend your time how you want to spend it.
So decluttering. I know that we're all different. There's definitely a spectrum of what is the most beneficial for each one of us, what simplicity looks like, what minimalism looks like. But for me, at least, I can speak for my own experience. When my space is free of just clutter, the more I'm able to yeah focus on my task at hand, get into my work, not be as distracted, and not even feel as stressed or overwhelmed, even if
I have a lot on my schedule. If my physical space isn't as cluttered, then I feel more a to engage with whatever my obligations or responsibilities are that day. So just here's your encouragement. It can be a lot of work at first, but once you put in the big effort, its maintenance after that, and it can make such a huge difference.
Yeah, And one of the studies that we didn't cover that the last article reference did state that participants in their study who had less clutter were able to focus better on tests. So that's just another like science reason that having less physical stuff affects your mind and also affects your ability to make financial decisions, make spending decisions. We don't think so much about that, But the more clutter we have in our space in our mind, of course,
the poorer our decisions are going to be. Financially.
Yeah, the more clutter we have in our finances, the less likely we are to want to look at it because it feels overwhelming. But even simplifying the way that our spending and finances and build pay process looks like can also make us feel more competent and at ease in the way that we're navigating that aspect of our lives.
Yeah, the next one for me, and this is one that's hitting me really hard right now personally, So you're a little vulnerable before well, social media. I very much dislike social media. I really hate participating in it. I really hate consuming it and creating it. I think it can be really helpful, but I think it's few and far between that it's helpful. Ninety five percent of it is mind numbing entertainment, things that distract us from what's going on in reality, and then like five percent of
it is very helpful content. So like, there is good stuff out there on social media. Like I would never say that that everything is trash, but so much of it is and not trash, it's just so distracted, and
it is clutter. It is clutter, it's mind clutter, and so decluttering your social media, fasting from social media, whatever you feel like you need to do to get out of social media, is going to help you simplify other things in your life by just simplifying that one thing, Like what's the one thing that's going to make other things down the line easier or unnecessary. I really think minimizing social media is one of those things, because then
you're minimizing ads the cause you to spend. You're minimizing seeing like your friends have new things that you want. They're not even trying to sell you. They just are having it, but you see it and then you want it. So it minimizes that aspect, But then it also minimizes just the habit of just picking up your phone and
ignoring what's going on and like consuming social media. And that's so much of what I do that it's very hard to strike a balance between like having a job like this where people want to see your face, right, and it's like good, this is how I make the you know, the bit of money that I do make, the big bucks that I do make. So it's hard to like strike that there is no balance. I'll just say there's no balance with me between like trying to show my face.
It's like all or nothing. Like sometimes it is heavy, it's all on, like we recently started dating, and then other times it's like, I don't know, we're on a break.
Yeah, So that's how I feel about social media. So if you don't see me on social media, that's.
Why I know. Oh likewise, but yeah, we're just in a process of simplifying, you know, Yeah, that's what's happening.
Okay.
So the third one that I do love, just related to simplicity is number three, getting out of debt. I know we talk about this a ton, it's one of the biggest things we discuss when it comes to this podcast. But when we look at this from a lens of simplicity, I have to agree as well, and you reference in this article, it doesn't just mathematically make sense, but is also a mental and emotional weight lifted. Now we recognize this is a long journey. This isn't like a declutter
your home this weekend getting out of debt. For many of us, this is a long haul decision that will often take years. So there's a lot that needs to go into that, but it does lead to freed up mental and emotional space, freed up finances, and just ability to now make decisions for investing for retirement or having maybe a little bit more discretionary income, or just not worrying that much anymore. And that is an incredible benefit. So that's a great way to simplify as well.
Yeah, and something I feel like I want to point out is that lately we've been getting a lot of questions about consolidating debt, which does have the benefit of simplifying, right, So, like, what we're talking about is simplifying, but I think it's over advertised because it's advertised is a way to save on debt, but in reality saves you very little on debt. It just moves debt around. It makes you think you've
done something because you have simplified the problem. So that's not a bad thing, but you need to know what you're getting into. And like, we don't typically recommend debt consolidation because while it does simplify what the debt looks like, it is adding a level of complexity to your actual financial practice. So it's not like a simplification of you know, when you pay off your smallest loan, that debt goes away.
So this is one of the one of the benefits of the debt snowball is that you can simplify what your debt looks like or what your bank accounts look like more quickly. So it's a quicker simplification process. Even though maybe it costs at a little bit more mathematically, it does give you that simplifying part quicker, And so we would probably say do that instead of consolidating debt. If that's what you're thinking thinking about, not that's helpful.
Yeah.
My next one is number four. We're not going to go through every single one of them.
I don't know.
What just happens upfront is what I did. Uh So number four is learn to say no and that that's going to offend something you're talking to me. No, I'm not like you know, you know how to say no, but some people don't. And I think I grew up watching these people. So in my adult life I say the first line. I am the type of person who says no first. I always say no first, and then I take time to think about it and whether I want my to change my answer to yes.
Yeah.
So some people would say, Jen, you should just say let me think about it first.
Do too much on the other instrum.
Yeah.
So so maybe I wouldn't recommend becoming me, but a lot of people start with lead with yes, just out of insecurity wanting to be a people pleaser. Oh, this is a perfect example. So last week I took like a Girl's trip with our friends Caroline Wensel Alison Baggerley inspired budget. Alison is a gem of a person and a people pleaser, and so there. I can't even remember what it was, but like, I think I was maybe road raging for a second. And I won't repeat what I said.
But we don't have the explicit rating, right.
Alison was like, oh, I was like I always like give these people the benefit of the depth or no. No, it was a social media thing. It wasn't road rage. Somebody was trying to like manipulate, to manipulate her, I'll just say that. And she knew it too, she knew it, but she just wanted to give them the benefit of the doubt, even though she knew what they were doing. She just wanted to say yes, yeah, because she wanted
to give them the benefit of the doubt. And you know, she's just a gem of a person, right, Saying no to people who are trying to manipulate you does not make you any less of a gem. Yeah, that's what.
You're working out. I mean, it sounds like the radical middle. Whether you find yourself on one extreme of leading with no or leading with yes. Is that Let me think about it, and either side could choose that pathway, just to give yourself space just a pause to identify, is this something I want to engage in, and I think, I mean, it sounds like a great way of living for Allison to just be a gem of a person. Like then everybody likes you and everybody we all do.
But if it hurts you, I think that's where it's time for some reevaluation. If you are always saying yes at the cost of yourself and your own well being, then that's where we need to kind of identify some different patterns and relating.
Even if it doesn't always end up in you being a stressed, overtired people pleaser, if it's resulting in that more often than it is resulting in you being filled up, there's an issue because there are a lot of important things that you have to do that aren't going to fill you up, but they're important, so we have to do them. So if you're doing things for other people that are draining you as well that you don't have to do, those things need to be cut out of
your life. And it's not always it's typically not people trying to manipulate you. It's typically really well intentioned people that really see that you would be a good fit for something and it's a good opportunity. But sometimes you have to say no to good so that you can pursue great And so you have to really either say no or say I'll think about it, yeah, to really give yourself time to figure out is this good or is this great?
And that's what leads to simplifying our schedules, which I think for many of us is where we all need the most work of how do I continue to kind of rain myself in from the vortex of busyness that will suck us in. I do think there needs to be active, intentional, perpetual awareness of the vortex of busyness. It will always want to suck us in and own us, so that saying no is what leads to some of that more simple schedule. I am going to jump all the way to the bottom of this. I'm done going
in order is plan a simple menu? Ugh, I could not agree with this more and probably because you wrote
it and I like and our friends. But I think when it comes to activities that we have to do daily, like food, this is also where we can experience a lot of overwhelm and fatigue and can lead to the convenience purchases of eating out or ordering takeout, which isn't always the friendliest for our budgets or our money if it's not something that's been planned for, and so I think one way to get around that is to really simplify what we're going to eat at home throughout the week.
That doesn't mean that it's bland or not fun or inedible, just simple like pairing down the number of ingredients that you need. You can still reuse and repurpose ingredients, but making it easier or more accessible for yourself will cut down on the amount of times that you feel like you need to eat out. It will have the decisions already made for you, so there's less of that decision fatigue and usually can lead to lower cooking times not
taking up as much of your space and energy. For me personally, I think one of the ways that I do this is I'll change up a lot of what we'd eat for dinner, reusing ingredients, but my breakfasts and lunches from week to week will look very similar. Like a breakfast for me, it's two options. It's going to be a smoothie or some eggs and toast, and that's fine because I know I'm still going to get variety that day. Lunches I'll have two to three options on hand in any given week, so I feel like I
have options, but it's not complicated. I'm not reinventing all of the time and then changing up week to week what the dinners are going to be. Again, still doesn't have to be complicated, but I found the simpler that I can keep it, the more likely I am to eat at home and stick with it. Sometimes it's really fun to try the new thing and make a new you'll every single night just to like keep our palettes tantalized.
But that's not gonna last long. There's no longevity in that, and we're not going to experience the benefits of simplicity in that way.
Absolutely. I hate that I have to pick just one more from the list because it's like.
My people can go check it out. Yeah, you're artically check it out.
There's some like okay, so there's some really concrete, practical tips, but I'm gonna go with one more non concrete one. And I know you guys hate that, but here I am five is focus on one thing at a time.
I left that for you. I'm like, I did not steal her one thing that is through and through she has trademarked I am.
I am obsessed with the concept of and it's essentially the just the concept of prioritizing to choose, be intentional about the things that you are working on, the financial goals that you are working on, the life change goals you are working on. Be intentional and work on one at a time. Making small changes and working on one thing at a time is not sexy. We do not want to have gradual growth and change. We love a
good overnight success and that's just not reality. It's just not like if your New Year's resolution was to lose ten pounds, payoff debt, and have a smoothie every day, how's that going for you? How is that going for you? I am sure not well. But if your New year's resolution was just I want to want to drink eighty ounces of water every day, that's it. No other goals, nothing.
Doesn't mean you're not doing anything at all. It's just not taking up the majority of your focus.
Right. It's like one choose one thing that can help multiple other things. So like just keeping on the water. I know that's not financial, but water can help you, you know, get your cravings under control, so it'll help with food. It can help you get your hormones and your water weight fluctuations under control, so it helps with that, it helps with so many other different things. Yet it is one thing. It is just one thing, and it's much easier to do than focusing on all these big,
higher level goals. So, yes, your goal may be to pay off debt, but what are the actions that are going to take you to get there? Okay, think about those and then pick one to focus on at a time and really dig into it until you feel like you've mastered it and you can move on. Yes, that is focusing on one thing at a time, and that is what's going to move the needle. We can't all be overnight success stories. If it happens, cool, but don't plan for that. Don't plan to be an overnight success story.
And really, the journey is so much more, oh my god, yeah, than the destination when you are.
When you become an overnight success you miss out on all the learning and growth that the journey provides. So it's really you miss out on a lot. So plan to be average, play to be normal.
Do you know what my very average one thing is, to the exclusion of all other things, This is the one thing, nothing else, but whereby doing we we we we gain so much.
But I think it was an overnight success. I mean it's a wonder thing.
This one is the like the destination, the journey. The bill of the week.
That's right, it's time for the best minute of your time week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you've paid off your mortgage, maybe your card died and you're happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That's bills, bffalo bills, Bill Clinton.
This is the bill of the week.
So find feet from Scotland. This month, I cleared my online banking overdraft for which I was being charged monthly. Transferred the violence to zero percent credit card, so now I can peel off my credit card without the monthly charges I was getting. Will I was in my overdraft, I was being charged thirty pound a month, which will now just go off to paying off that date.
Thanks. Isn't it so interesting when you start to look at your finances and you find things that you don't want to find, like you're being charged thirty dollars a month for overdrafting. That's crazy. But now Katie, you took you were brave, and you went in there like Meredith. I envisioned that you are like Mereda because I like Disney and you just went in there and you said no more transferring it. And now I'm gonna use this thirty dollars a month to pay off my credit card.
Yes, well done, Katie from Scotland. Jen is being quite imaginative.
I don't even know where Scotland is where that movie takes place, and I'm so sorry. If it's not Yeah, here we go.
It's Irish. Maybe she was Scottish. Okay, we're gonna figure that out, Katie, but mostly we're focused on you. And yeah, how you paid off your credit card? You no longer got these overdraft fees happening, So just well done. What do you got, Jen, She.
Is voiced by a Scottish actress. Huh, it's from obviously a made up place. So we're gonna say, We're gonna say Scotland. Okay, we're gonna go to Scotland. You went, Katie.
For sharing a Hill of the week. If you all listening want to share your bill if it has anything to do with like a Disney movie character, sliceing and dice and some overdraft fees or paying off credit cards, or or your name is Bill. I don't know how many times I have to say this. Visit Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash Bill, leave us your bill.
No, it's time for I don't think I have to get any more vulnerable because I already got vulnerable. No, no, no.
It doesn't work that way. You chose vulnerability, this is now vulnerability.
Okay, So what's something in your life that has been hard to simplify? And I think you should go first?
Uh huh. I feel like did you write this question or was this a goldie question?
Is me?
Oh, my schedule? This is so vulnerab because I would love to say that I'm just like crushing simplicity, and maybe I'm doing that in my possessions and just like getting rid of things, But I'm not crushing it my schedule.
The nicer you are, and the more of a gem of a person you are, I think, the harder it is to simplify the schedule.
The thing about it for me is I don't think. I don't feel as though I am just bending to the will and needs of others. There is a true tension for me. We were talking about this even before we hit the record button today where I want a lot of things, it is mostly a me problem where I want all of the things. I want rest and opportunities to explore my hobbies and things that are life
giving to me. And I want to grow this business and pursue other types of career, and I want to host people, and I want to hang out and I want to build community, like I just want all the things, like I want to say yes to it all, not because I feel like I'm play cating someone or something. It just truly is what I want to do. So that has been and potentially will be a forever and always thing to navigate of still sincerely keeping a pulse on. Okay, but what is going to be best for me? What
is this going to cost me? Not just monetarily, like what will this cost me in my energies and capacities? What will that potentially steal from something else? Like if I choose to go all out just in the social world, then there is a cost benefit analysis to that. There's an opportunity cost then that means projects aren't getting done at my house, or if I go all in on projects,
that means community is not being found. So it's there is such a tension, and I'm sure there's plenty of people listening who like want to collect all the things. You just want to do it all and it's all so appetizing and appealing and fun and enjoyable. So really deciding how do I want to spend like the twenty four hours that's been allotted to me and creating some space to keep a pulse on how is this impacting me? Was that? Was that a good choice? Or would I
want to shift or morph that in the future. Yeah, I'm not there. I don't know that I have or will be there.
Yeah, I don't think, especially because your value is so like very much aligned with what you were just saying, Like to be healthy in your values creates like the perfect schedule, but nobody's perfect or perfectly healthy. Yeah, so it's always something that you'll have to keep a pulse on.
I think I have also, I'll just say this and then I'll be done in case it's fruitful for anybody else. But I think I've realized that I had a narrative going that go Go Go go go was not good for me, mostly because of what I think is talked about like just being busy isn't isn't good? And I would partially agree with that, but then to also realize maybe that narrative is what's mostly unhelpful, Like I love spending time with people that is actually life giving. What
if that's a form of rest for me? Where I might have this very like mono idea like of oh, this is what rest is. It's only sitting down in complete quietness reading a book, That's what rest is. But to come to realize that might be somebody's rest, but for me, my rest can look different, and usually for most of us, we've got a lot of different forms
of rest. So I think it's been taking a lot of the pressure away from myself the things I put on myself to say this might feel like a lot, and maybe others would look on the way that I live my life or spend my time as like that's just too much. But it might be too much for that person and what's valuable for them, But for me, it's okay and it's not hurting me, and if anything, there's aspects of it that are life giving. So that's been a whole other kind of realization and mostly helpful
for me. To not just get bummed that I filled my space and time with people and things that I really enjoy. That can be Okay, that's lovely, that's great. What about you get vulnerable?
Well, I mean, I'm gonna is it a cop out to say the same the social media thing again? No do it, because that really does plague me. I was off social media entirely for about three months, and then people kind of convinced me to get back on. They're like, it's free marketing for your podcast and your business, and we're going for a book deal and every publisher wants to see you're active on social media. Like it's just so sad.
I feel like I hear this from you, Like there's always there's a cycle of yeah, I'm leaving it, this is good for me. Then you get into some mastermind group and they're like, you're shaming you into getting back on, and you're like, I know that they're right, and you do crush it. You post some really great stuff. You're funny, you're a gem, you're witty, you're insightful, You've got a lot to give. And I think that's especially in this space right where there's like a business connected to it.
That's a big component. There's got to be a radical middle. And we're partially now getting into business meeting here. Yeah, we'll find.
The radical We will have to find the radical middle. Yeah, so that's that's kind of where I'm at. I just I don't have strong enough boundaries or self discipline to not get sucked into it. It is for sure, like, yeah, I am, I could be more disciplined, but also I can give myself grace for just being not perfect. Yeah, so that's where I'm at.
Agreed, Listening back to that.
Lightning round about being stressed to be on social media one hundred percent still a struggle, Still still a struggle. I think we're getting closer to a radical metal. It's so weird to hear, like we were trying to get a book deal and yes, that was important we had to do. We had to, Yeah, like it was not an option, and it did impact our activity on social media did impact the book deal we got, and we
got a good book deal. And so now yeah, and it's still one of those like when we talk about the one thing, what's one thing you can do to make all other things easier or unnecessary? Social media kind of ties into that I think we've decided YouTube is that one thing for us this year, because it makes social media easier and it is an integral part of our growth.
I think part of our radical middle that we've found in social media is me taking on some of the social media management. To everyone's full shock and surprise, you are the one.
That initially did the Frugal Friends podcast Instagram. In those early days, you made a great for every episode.
Oh that's right. You started it right.
And now you're You're just coming home, is what it is.
I still can't stand Instagram, but if I'm gonna do it, this is the best case scenario for it. I actually prefer to engage with Instagram as Frugal Friends than I do on my own personal accounts. I say, not one who's just posting whatever. I really like giving helpful and entertaining content. So when I've been able to come at it with that framework and lens, it has really lowered the barrier to entry for me.
Yes, and I have enjoyed taking our YouTube videos and making those into reels because that is very easy for me.
I love that. Look at us forget we find the radical metal.
We find it in community. Oh, I think we don't find it in isolation.
A great Thank you all so much for listening to this podcast. Thank you also for reading our book, maybe even listening to our book because it is an audio format and those of you who have read the book have been leaving such kind reviews, so we've been wanting to give some space to reading the reviews of our book, like this one from Jack one p thirty five stars says, an absolute gem of a book that's focused on spending. I love this book so much. It's a breath of
fresh air from other personal finance books. The focus is not on budgeting or baby steps, and instead is on understanding values and all of the things that trigger spending. If you already have your budget, this book is the next step to think more about spending habits. It's worth coming back to reread and reference Jen and Jill's words. The writing is non judgmental. For a reminder when I'm
struggling with shopping. One of the biggest takeaways retail therapy can feel like the one thing we can control when things are chaotic. Also check out their podcast for Cool Friends.
Yes, thank you so much.
Jack.
The funny thing is that so many people have said that the book is shamefree and non judgmental. That those are some of the words Amazon has used in the biggest like what people say most shameful, judgmental, but yet every other word or shame align with that, right, Yeah, it's powerful, helpful, values based spending shaming.
Yeahs like, oh, they're probably saying it's non shaming.
It's hilarious. Thank you so much, Jack, Thank you for listening. Thank you for reading the book. If you have not gotten your copy of Buy What You Love without going broke, please head to buy what youlovebook dot com. We also have directions on there for requesting it at your library. So and if you have, please leave a rating and review for the book on Amazon good Reads, review for the show on Spotify or Apple. All of it helps us and spreading this message to more people.
See you next time.
Bye. Frugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni.
Okay, Jen, I figured it out. Oh would you figure out? I'm sitting over here with a smelly shirt. Oh, yeah, shirt smells.
I can't smell it.
That's very good. Yeah, I think you'd have to be as close as my noses to my shirt to smell it. But I am constantly getting whiffs of something, and then I really First of all, I didn't realize where the smell was coming from. Then I realized it's my shirt. And now I'm like, why does my shirt smell? And I think I have come to the answer. So this is actually like an elongated sports brawl that I'm wearing.
And during the hurricanes, we stayed with friends who were not in a flood zone, but they have a part of their property that becomes like a little pond when it rains a ton, And before the winds got really bad, we went swimming in the water that becomes a pond.
On my face has changed from intrigued to alarmed.
Alarmed, yeah, and then so it was like a bathing suit top for me. Then then we showered, rinsed off the top in the shower, but left it at their house, didn't remember to pack it back up with us when we moved our whole lives back into our home after the hurricane, and then didn't get this shirt back from
them until at least two months later. I did wash it, but I'm thinking it sat so long in pond water or like the remains of pond water, that it is still holding on to the stench of it despite having been washed. And this is now the first time that I'm wearing it realizing, Yeah, it didn't, it didn't wash out.
Because of you're all natural.
Washing going for the Yeah, maybe maybe maybe the length of time is to blame. Maybe my homemade laundry detergent is to blame. I'm gonna go with length of time. Sitting in pond water.
I'm just thinking, like I wouldn't let my children and swim in pond water like.
Just ever under any circumstances.
I mean, it's a They make those to be like those little retention ponds, and so there can't be good stuff pulling up in there like throughout time, and then it just pools in and it's all gross, and then the rain comes and just softens it so you can't see it. It's all still in there though.
Well it wasn't. It wasn't. There was no water in it before the hurricane, right, so I could just see the bottom. I could see it. What was there grass? Look, listen, I didn't stay in the water long. It was a quick little The world is crumbling around us, but you know what, we can swim in this two feet of water over here.
For two feet? Oh yeah, you do.
We just like sat there for a minute.
All of this seems so bizarre to me.
When the world is grumbling around you, Jen, you take what you can get. Listen, you took videos hold on in the midst of a hurricane, sitting on the front porch just watching pumpkins float by. I did, and that was taken what you could get, just the simple pleasures of life.
There is so much different me noticing something funny and taking a video of it and.
You noticing an opportunity.
For fun noticing two feet of standing water and walking into it.
Yeah, okay, yeah, it is a choice I made.
I'm glad you're now.
I am still experiencing the consequences because this shard smells