Psychological Tricks for Sticking to Your Budget

make changes that serve you better sticking to one. Yeah, we really like to talk about how we are whole people and all of the aspects of our personhood that go into some of these decisions. They're not isolated. What we do with money is connected to their parts of our being, and it's good to take a look at that and see, is this part of why I am overspending or not getting at the actual coalts I say that I have. Yes. Yeah, So no tricks here, just

treats for helping you to besh it amazing. But first our sponsors. This episode is also brought to you by house Plants. Brain stuff is heavy and complex, so if you feel tired after listening to this episode, go water your house plants. House plants are really cool when you can keep them alive, and they tend to live longer if you water them. Sometimes they need more soil, and I don't know where the soil goes, especially if there's

no holes in the planter. But whatever, house plants. Shout out to all the ladies who are plant moms before I'm gonna you, Jillian, thank you. Thanks for valid aiding me and my love for plants. It's not just trendy. It is trendy, but it's not just trendy. It's a way of life for you. Have you had more success keeping your house plants alive? Only the ones inside my house, The ones outside my house that I don't see all the time are for sure all dead. It's interesting that

you say that about the soil piece. I've noticed that too, and I think it's what plants need soil. They take nutrients out of it, so yeah, sometimes you need to add soil to it. It's a lesser talked about thing with house just like it's either too much water not enough water. And sometimes you need to put your plants in a new pot because they're growing out of the pot that they're in. Sometimes they need more nutrients in their soil. So anyhow, there's your plants for the day.

Let's talk about psychology. Yes, so we have a few kind of bigger named articles today. Sometimes we try and get the really good you see, like smaller blogs that can say whatever they want. That today we're sticking with the Forbes and a vox dot com. So this first one is from Forbes and it's, uh, it's short, but it's good. It is cognitive science tips for sticking to your budget. What do you think of this one, Jill,

It's great, Like you said, it's short and sweet. And to give a little background two on why Jen and I like to look at this topic because I'm sure if you've been listening to this podcast long enough, you've heard some of these themes come out of emotionally, Yeah, cognitive pieces behind the decisions that we make and again we are whole people. But also my background is in mental health, so this is definitely something that I went about.

This is the beautiful blend of our friendship. I think of talking about finances and how that intersects with our mental, emotional, relational, spiritual health as well. So that's just a brief background on why are they talking about psychology, But again, because it's matters. That's why our brains are the ones that spend. We don't go into things just like Nope, nobody makes us spend money on most things. Like we decide to spend money, and sometimes we spend money and we regret it.

We spend money and things we don't want, and we're like, why did I do that? Why can't I stick to a budget? I made the budget, um And these are the reasons why this is what we're looking at. I appreciate that the article started out by talking about some of the overspending that we've been seeing through the pandemic, so it's even relevant. I mean it's always relevant of we as humans can struggle with overspending, but particularly through

the pandemic. I think there was a lot of what they term some comfort spending, which we turned to, we turned to any level of coping mechanism, and for some of us it can and bring just that feel good thing to buy something that I want to have, some instant gratification, something new, something cool, And so recognizing that and kind of where that comes from is part of this part of the cognitive science behind why we spend.

And so we'll just go through all of the things that they list might be leading to overspending or not sticking to budgets or not sticking to our goals, because I think all of them are useful. Yeah, And I like that it refers to it as cognitive science research because we don't always I mean, we don't think of our spending and our budgeting in terms of cognitive science. So I love and I'm like a geek for stuff like this too. So I love that the first one

was recognizing and combating decision fatigue. So decision fatigue refers to how carefully analyzing all the various crows and cons takes effort. We make thousands of little micro decisions a day, and every decision you make wears you down little by little. After you make choice after choice, and by the end of the day, our willpower reserves have dried up. And

that is decision fatigue. And so that's why a lot of times you can find yourself very successful in sticking to a diet or sticking to a budget or something for the first you know, two thirds of the day, but it's that last third typically when we get to dinner time where it becomes really hard and all of our progress goes out the window. That is in part due to decision fatigue, and that's why we say you have to set yourself up for success. After work, that's

the most important part. That's where the meal planning, the meal prep and all of that comes into place. I think the same can be said throughout a week too. By the time we reach Friday, we can be exhausted and everything can go out the window on the weekend. So you name it. We have another way to term this would be capacity. We do not have unlimited emotional, relational, mental capacity, and at some point we're going to reach

our capacity. There's land mines all over that. Sometimes we do well to discover that before we hit one of those landmines, and sometimes we don't. End it leads to overspending. But recognizing we're not unlimited and how to put in some of these helps along the way for us so that we can be operating within our capacity. That's going to be one of the things that's going to help us towards those those financial goals is recognizing decision fatigue

and knowing then how to handle it. Yeah. So, I mean that's a big reason why you see, like you know, the tech billionaires like the Steve Jobs and those people like we're the same thing every day, is because they've been taught this decision fatigue by whoever their mentors are, and they just take different decisions off the table. I put out a week of clothes for my son on Sunday, so in the mornings I never have to wonder what

he's gonna wear. It's already like stacked there by his bed, and so what are It's not just meal planning, but like look at your life and figure out what are the things throughout the day you can do, especially after work,

that can take decisions off of your plate. No decision is too small to be taken off your plate, because we're looking all the way down at micro decisions and so the fewer decisions we have to make, obviously the bigger ones take more effort, cause more fatigue, but we're even looking at taking some of those micro decisions off of our plates too. So that's a big thing to be aware of in your life. And look at what are the things I can plan ahead for on Saturday

or Sunday. Take those things off of my plate, or what are things I can be doing Wednesday Thursday to take decisions off my plate Saturday Sunday. If that is where you struggle more with with your overspending. I've noticed I do so much better eating at home if I just have a written list of the food that I

can eat for lunch and dinner. It doesn't even have to be a full on Monday, I'm making this, but to even have it written down of you have these options available to you between your fridge and your freezer, and just seeing it takes out, yeah, some of that decision fatigue and where I might then just go and say let's just order out. Well, no, you have stuff. Here's what it is like. Those simple things are helpful.

That's so great, and that's great for people who like quote unquote hate planning or hate a rigid meal plan. If you just make a list, these are the things that I can make and just pick one. Yeah, exactly. The next one on this list is to not be tempted with introductory offers. So the con and of science part of this would be the things that are appealing to us that look good and shiny, and marketers know this.

Of how can we rope people in two overspending, They're primarily talking about credit card companies and how they will often offer this really low or zero percent a p Y financing only to get you out with very high a p r s in the future, and that might not be the case maybe for all of our listeners. Maybe it's something else, But I feel like this could be applied across the board. It's not just credit cards

trying to rope you in. I mean this is where we could think subscriptions, Oh X y Z is free for the first seven days, but then they all they get you to input your credit card information so then they're automatically charging you after that and we forget to go back in and cancels. So just being aware of the fine print in any situation, of course, our eyes can glaze over with fine print, but that shouldn't be

a reason that we find ourselves overspending. We really need to have a better handle on what is this really offering? What's the catch? Will is this actually useful and valuable to me? Will I actually take advantage of this? Or am I falling for a marketing tactic right now? Yeah? What this one made me think of where lost leaders.

So companies, yeah, offering you the free seven day trial, or offering you the free ice cream if you come into the store, the five dollar chicken at Costco, and so these are things that will get you into a store or onto a mailing list that don't even make the company money. But when you take an action with a company, you're warming up to that company, so it becomes easier for you to walk through the doors again

or to open another email. And so the more you do those micro actions, those micro interactions with a company, the more comfortable you become and the more likely you become to spend money with them. And so while free stuff is great, we highly highly recommend free trials and getting what you can from companies. Don't be tempt like, don't take those for granted. Those are marketing tactics, and so they also bank on the concept of reciprocity. So if I do something for you, you're more likely to

do something for me. And so know that that's a marketing tactic. You're not obligated to do something for any company no matter what they've given you. It is their choice to do that. And so with these introductory offers, marketing tactics just be aware of what the tactic is so you can be more empowered. Two or come it. So the last one on here, like we said, real short um but real, I mean packs a punch is

to avoid envy inducing social media channels. So that's your friends on Facebook, your Instagram, influencers that you love to follow. Social media can be such a great place. It has brought such relationships together as my husband and I, as Jill and I, but it can also be a really dangerous place and cause a lot of envy. And just like wishing not. People are not even being malicious when they're doing these things. They're just very excited for themselves.

And you're over here like I'm trying to reach a goal and that's out of my budget, but I want that jacket so bad. But look at how fun that vacation looks. Have. I'll even add to this, social media

has just become a big old ad. Most of what you're seeing is ads, if not like blatant ads where you know this is just a sponsored post, but even a lot of those people sometimes your friends are selling something, whether they themselves are selling something, or they have partnered with a company selling something, whether some of those people that you're following on Instagram that you think are like living a really cool RV lifestyle, they're trying to sell

you something they've partnered with somebody check it out in their hashtags. Like as fun as those pictures are to look at, I would venture to say only about five percent of people are you actually just keeping up with what's happening in their lives, and they're not actually an ad for you. And even then, if they're posting just about their lives, chances are they're posting the best part of their lives that could be envy inducing. So no matter what you do, that scroll is just trying to

get your money, So beware. Yeah, that is it is dangerous. And I have definitely purchased things that I've seen on Instagram and TikTok I'm not beyond it. And we're absolutely not against marketing or the cool things. I mean, TikTok taught me pesto eggs, and you know, like praises because that's delicious, um, but pesto eggs, Oh, it's uh. You use instead of oil, you use pesto two and and you put the pesto in the pant and then break the egg on the pesto. Yeah, and then you put

it over some sour dough. Sometimes people put like avocado or ricotta, so it's it's delicious and you just have to make sure it's in your budget. Like that's what we're talking about. Spend with your values. Spend on what you want to spend on. Just make sure it's what you really want to spend and not what you feel like you should spend or you feel like you want to spend. Don't trust your feelings, trust your values, do

the scroll. Just make sure it's mindful. Absolutely, and basically, I think in summary with this article, they're saying they're advocating for us understanding our own thoughts and feelings behind what might be leading us to overspend or not stick to our quote unquote budget. It could be a variety of things. It could be that our budget isn't realistic, or we do have a tendency to buy when we're sad,

you name it. But we're not going to actually be able to change our behaviors if we're not looking at the thoughts and feelings leading to that. So a little bit of mental health counseling background for you. Many of you will be familiar with this concept. It's a cognitive behavioral therapy CBT for short, concept that our thoughts lead

to feelings lead to behaviors. This cycle thought. First, we have the thought, which then gives us some sort of feeling or emotion inside of us, which then leads to the behavior. And a lot of times we will try to hit something at the behavior level and it totally misses the mark. We have to understand what comes before it if we're gonna want to change the behavior, So taking some steps backward and saying, well, what was the

thought that I had here? Even drawing it out? I will have folks in my counseling sessions actually draw it out. What thought did you have? Then? What feeling did that produce? Then? What was the behavior? And if you want to seek to change the behavior, you're going to have to interrupt it,

hopefully at the thought level. It can be interrupted at the feeling level too, But ideally we get to the point where we can snatch it at the thought level, adjust the thought around it, which then will change the feeling and it will change the behavior into something more avantageous and beneficial for us. Mm hmm, I hope, I hope you got that. If you didn't catch all that, then you know, go back fifteen seconds because that was gold.

Thank you, j Thank you. Alright, So let's move on to our next article from Fox dot com and it's five sneaky mental tricks to spend less while shopping And I liked every single one of these and all of the little graphics that go with them. Fox just really does it. So, Jill, what did you think of this one? It was a visually pleasing article. And they use the

term behavioral economics. So for those of you who want just more research and more on these kinds of topics, these are the types of things you can be searching for. What does behavioral economics have to do with this? What does cognitive science have to do with this? Those are some good keyword searches. Richard Failure is a really good author of behavioral economic experts, so anything by him it

will be good. Yeah. And so they start this article out by saying that behavioral economics can teach us a lot about why we tend to neglect our budgets or overspend. One theory that can stick out from behavioral economics is the present bias, meaning we will often value the present gratification over the long term, and they referenced the marshmallow research to test. That's the word thank you, which I don't know if you've seen it, Jen, I think there's

that magician Magic for Humans. I use that one all the time. It's so good. I mean, first of all, it's just such a fun show. If you haven't checked

it out, check it out Magic for Humans. And he does this test with like toddlers and young kids, which is just so funny of offering them a marshmallow now or to marshmallows later, and some of them you can see, it's so cute, they like hold out and then others are like, I want this thing now, like they eat it, but then they try and hide the fact that they

ate it. But we're no different from those dollers. Yeah exactly, Yeah that we even though we can rationally say it's going to be more advantageous to me and my future self if I let this thing grow and and have greater benefit in the future, but I want my marshmallow right now. I want this good thing right now. Because we do we favor our present selves over our future selves. I'm not my future self right now. I'm my present

self right now, and I want to treat myself. And so just even recognizing that can help interrupt some of those patterns that show is so great. He uses a lot of these psychological techniques that is magic. You have to know people and human behavior in order to trick them.

One of so, another one of my favorites of his is that he's talking to people and he's like, I can guess which actor you're thinking of, and so he has he says this and like nah, and though he has a conversation with them and then asks them to think of an actor, and he shows them what he's written down before he even started the conversation, and without fail, all of them say Tom Hanks. And he wrote down

Tom Hanks. And the reason he was able to get them to all say Tom Hanks is because throughout the conversation he was just dropping particular words or concepts or ideas from different Tom Hanks movies, so like Castaway, Toy Story, all of these things to make them think of Tom Hanks movies. Um. And so it was so crazy because

that's also a marketing technique. So luxury marketers will use in their marketing uh more luxury focused words verbe edge to make you feel like you deserve luxury, like that's what you are accustomed to and can afford, whether it is true or not. So that's also, yeah, marketers use that all over the place. We've got to combat these magic tricks with our own magic tricks. And you said it's not about tricks, but it might be. It might be tricks are for kids and maybe for adults. Yeah,

so let's dive into some of these tricks. The first one is to never go shopping without a list. And this might seem so old fashioned, but it is so effective. And it's not like a cash envelope system that's like very inconvenient. Shopping with the list is very convenient. Um, it's, you know, not the most convenient, but it is still convenient. And it just helps you so much to avoid impulse buys. Not only does it help impulse buys, it helps me when I'm at the store not forget something and have

to come back to the store. So as I run out of something, I just have a running list on my phone. And actually Eric and I are taking it to the next level where I'm making a checklist like a Google Sheets checklist or a Google checklist, I guess is what it is, and then I share it with him. So for at the store together and we really want to be efficient with our time. We both have access to the checklist and we're able to check it off, so we're able to keep up with each other knowing, Oh,

he already got this. I don't need to text him or call him and let him know I I already got the toilet paper, headed to the frozen food. It's like, yeah, I know, wow, trying to hack our whole lives. But does it helps? Yeah, to be when you're shopping. It helps to not forget things and then it helps keep you from buying things you don't need. Yeah, that would be effective. Like when Travis will go to the grocery store just randomly for something, He's like, you need anything

from the grocery store, Like, I don't know. You can share a list and then you know exactly what you need at the grocery store. The next one on this list is to double check that you are in fact

getting the best value. So this could mean you are at the store, you see something that is already on your list, and you want to know the first thing could be, well, I'm just gonna go get this, but we would strongly encourage you to do a quick search on your phone, thank goodness for smartphones, and make sure that that is the best deal that you can purchase it for or even if it's possible that you could get that thing used. So just make sure even even if it's on your list, you know I need this.

This has been something I've had my eyes on for a while. Make sure that the store that you're at is going to give you the best deal. Yeah, I like to say mentioned bulk shopping. People tend to overspend and where how stores and bulk shopping is not the enemy. You just have to make sure a you're not buying bulk for the sake of buying bulk because it typically is a better deal, but you have to make sure it's only on things that you really need or will

benefit from buying in bulk. And then also actually do check the price per unit, because if it's just a few cents, it may not be worth buying in bulk, especially if it's something that's perishable. So this is is really something to consider if you are a bulk shopper or prefer bulk buying. Yes, I had noticed I recently did that. The bulk price on just some window cleaner was so much better. I would say it was like thirty percent less expensive than if I were to have

bought like two bottles of window cleaner. And it was actually preferred for me because I have my own spray bottle. So now this could just act like a refill for the entire house, rather than needing to get individual bottles from the store and keep them in the different rooms bathrooms, kitchen, laundry room throughout the house. Just refill it with that. And it's also reducing waste because now I have one

container rather than three containers that I've bought. So yeah, sometimes it is just even when you're at the store. Know if it doesn't mean I've got to go to a different store. Are you getting the best value? But like you said, are you using it to We don't just want to become hoarders because it's a better price. Absolutely. So the third on this list is to don't shop when you're feeling emotional. So this is so huge, I'm

gonna just read this first um line right here. More than seven and ten people consider their finances a source of stress. According to a Capital one survey of more than two thousand respondents in the US. If you're among them, be especially conscious when you're spending, since you're emotions may further cloud your judgment. Isn't this, sus a vicious cycle? Money makes us stress, stress makes us shop shopping reduces our our liquid cash, and then it's and then all

over again. Yeah, it is a vicious cycle. So yeah, I think one way you can combat this is to again be prepared so you don't have to make as many decisions when you're stressed, because that increases decision fatigue exponentially.

So make a list of things self care, things you can do when you're feeling different types of emotions, so not just negative emotions, but positive emotions too, because sometimes we can shop to celebrate, But what are the things that you're going to do when you're feeling sad, What are the things you're gonna do when you're feeling mad, What are the things you're going to do when you're

feeling like really joyful or happy? And so you have things to do other than shop to celebrate or deal with these emotions, and they don't have to be like, you know, schedule a call with your therapist, they don't have to even be effective, but just something you can do real quick, instant gratification, like so that you're not running to the store too, you know, blow off steam or whatever with an emotion and already having a list for when you're in the moment again helps remove some

of those barriers of decision fatigue or being able to problem solve that in the moment when you are excited or you are sad. So just having a list, even though it's very simple, it's like I know these things already, just having them in front of you, something you can look at, Okay, what what thing on this list can I do? You're more likely to do it if the

barrier to that entry is taken away. Yeah, and it can eliminate some guilt too, I think, because we want to be we want to be efficient, and we want to be like healthier in all these areas. But when you're trying to change a habit, and this is you know, not a habit, but this is similar. When you're trying to change a habit, you need to replace it with something that's equal in kind of level, so to speak. And so if you are turning to shopping when you

have an emotion. You need to think of something that's on the same level as that, not necessarily like when I you know, I'm celebrating a raise, I'm going to give a thousand dollars to charity, that's a different level. You know. You need to think of something small that's on the same level as shopping that you can replace shopping with. So we're not trying to make like you know, become leaps and bounds better people, just a little something that's on the same level of shopping to replace that

emotional outlet. And I appreciate the spectrum that you described here because I'll be honest to hear this line when I when I first read this article, there's a part of me that once once a little bit of pushback on this. You know, don't chop when you feel emotional. Almost we can use this word emotional in a very negative way. It often is associated negatively like you're just being emotional, you know, it's a way to kind of

discount people. And so I like that you describe jen the spectrum either when we're happy or sad, and we know that there's other more complicated emotions than those two. But that's you know a little bit of the spectrum. I would maybe offer an alternative vernacular to this of

maybe feeling emotionally vulnerable. So in a position where you know I, because of X y Z again, whether happy or sad or somewhere in the middle, I am more vulnerable to making some of these decisions that might derail some of my goals or things that are actually going to benefit me. Knowing our vulnerabilities will help us to be able to protect them. There's nothing wrong with vulnerability.

Vulnerability is beautiful. It's part of the human condition. But knowing and recognizing our vulnerability and being able to care for ourselves in the midst of it move towards protection of vulnerability. I know I've said this sound bite before, but I'll say it again because I think it's relevant here. Vulnerability without protection leads to exploitation. I'll say it again because I do think that this is something even worth

like writing down. Vulnerability without protection leads to exploitation, meaning that if we don't move to protect these areas of vulnerability inside of ourselves, they will be exploited in us. An example of that would be I was sad there was no protection for me. I went to the coping mechanism that most made sense, and I spent my entire grocery budget for the month, right, that would be an exploitation.

There's other areas that we can talk about related to that, and of course there's so many deeper implications, but as far as talking about our budgets, this still remains true. And again, it's not about removing our vulnerability, it's about

moving to protect it. So, like you said, Jen, creating that list of go to things that we can do happy or sad that are going to be beneficial for us, that are not going to derail us from our hopes, goals and dreams when we're in those emotionally vulnerable states. Absolutely so so much wisdom right there. And that's exactly where my head went when you started. I was like, yes, the vulnerability without protection leads to exploitation and it is so relevant here, all right. So number four is to

sleep on it before purchasing large items. And so this is just a good rule of thumb. I member a few months ago, by the time this comes out, I was for something for my business, got a really big price tag for something and it was very stressful because I thought I needed it. I thought that it was the only way forward for me, but it seemed very out of my budget, and so I had to sleep

on it. After I cried quite a bit about it, and then I slept on it, and then I was I slept off that decision fatigue because I'm sure a lot, and I was exhausted when I went to sleep because I had all of these micro decisions running through my head about this purchase that I thought I should make, And when it's for your business, you can kind of justify it a little bit more than when it's for yourself. But yeah, I think it would might be the same

for kids. So I went to bed, and I woke up the next day and I was much more level headed about it and ended up thinking of or reaching out to find alternatives that were more affordable for me, and went with one of those. But I didn't that reaching out to find alternatives wasn't even on my mind when I was so stressed. So for sure, sleeping sleep is sacred. I love sleep, do it. Sometimes sleep is

the best thing we can do for ourselves. And I won't get too into the weeds on this, but when we are able to enter into that r E. M. Cycle, the rapid eye movement. It's like the specific and deepest point of sleep in our sleep cycle that that we have, and it is necessary for actual rest of our bodies and like rejuvenation of things. When we're able to get into that R E M cycle, it does help. The reason that we can wake up and think more clearly is for what can happen in our brains as we

sleep again. I'm not going to get too into the weeds or the science behind it, just know that sleep is helpful for our thought patterns are memory formation. It sleep allows us, specifically when we're in that R E M cycle, to be able to put things in correct files in our brain. So yes, for many, many reasons, it's good to be able to sleep on it and wake up refreshed and rejuvenated. We're not going to make the best decisions when we're sleep deprived, but especially if

we're feeling really uncertain about something. Usually there's nothing thing so urgent that we can't put a night of rest in between us and our final decision. Absolutely, and the final one on this is number five. To say no to sales unless the item is already on your list. So we already did allude to this, but you are not saving money if you're spending money. It doesn't matter how inexpensive that item is, how on sale it is

compared to what it typically goes for. If you don't need it, if it's not on your list, if it's not something you've had opportunity to sleep on, say no to it. No red yellow sticker is alluring enough to get you away from your savings and spending goals. So absolutely your ad isle of shame, shoppers, it's so dangerous looking in the mirror again, if it's something you needed. I already needed a beach chair. Thank you all defines for giving me one that's far less expensive than I

thought that I would ever get it. Fantastic, but no, thank you. She's its explosions. That was never on my West Chess explosion. It shouldn't be on anybody's list. It does sound good, though, but I already have cheddar goldfish at home snacks. Yeah, I mean the like marketers again will use uh this tactic. They will use percent to is off versus amount of money off, because percentages can be higher than amount of money and studies have shown that if something is you know percent off versus twenty

dollars off. Even if twenty is a higher percentage, people tend to go with the cent off if things are similar, because we're just a custom two or even thirty percent off. Thirty percent off is less than twenty dollars off, you will still go for the percentage one because it's a bigger number, and so the store makes more money because they're giving you less than twenty dollars off. You think you're getting a better deal because you see that thirty number,

but yeah, it's just not true. If you didn't need the item, if it's not on your list, you're not saving money. And I'm so sorry. There are some people out there that's love to find a deal like that, is there like their core value us They love to be on the hunt. But you can figure out you don't have to give up that value. Just think of another way to live it out. It doesn't have to be im purchasing things, at least for yourself. There are tons of things you can hunt for, so just creative,

just not people don't hunt for people. Oh yeah, I don't do that. You know. You know what's a better idea to do with your time? Oh? Yeah? That you can really channel your energy into whoever you are. That's right, it's time for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you paid off your mortgage. Maybe your car died, and you're happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That's Bill Buffalo Bills, Bill Clint, this is the bill

of the week. Hi John and Joel. This is Laura from New York. My bill of the week is my Target credit card bill. I finally paid it off. I got it in and I've always held the balance on it, sometimes even close to maxing it out, and since we bought our house last summer, I've held a pretty high balance on it, and my goal was to pay that off first. So I have paid it off and closed the account and opened a Target debit card because I

still need that five percent discount. So super excited to finally get that one paid off and stop impulse shopping at Target all the time. Thank you so much for the podcast. You guys are awesome. Yes, Laura, we do not listen to these before we play them just for

the llionth time. But it's so perfect, how so perfect, congruent and relevant to what we're talking about not only a decision that you made for yourself to pay it off and not have that lingering over you, but to set up barriers to experiencing this again in the future where you have debt on a target credit card, to connect it to the debit card, which is a specific tip and trick for Target. You can still get that five percent discount with a target debit card. It does

not have to be their credit cards. So well done, putting now a barrier in between you and where you know your vulnerabilities are protecting that vulnerability, Laura, well done. We're celebrating with you. Yes, if you want to submit your bill of the week, please visit Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash bill to leave us a bill. And now it's time for so today we are talking psychology tricks we personally use to keep from overspending that kind of share some of our triggers and how we get

creative in overcoming them. So, Jill, you have a list. I got a list I've sent and tricks baby girls start start give them to me. Please. Well, for those of you have listened for a while, you know that spending isn't necessarily my area of difficulty. It's I am between Eric and I. I am more of the saver. However, that's not to say that I am immune to impulse buys.

So here we go. I do not scroll shopping sites for entertainment, so you're not going to find me on Amazon or cute bathing suit websites or even Facebook Marketplace. Like I do not go on to Facebook Marketplace just for like a fun scroll to see what people are selling in the area I go on if I'm looking

for something specific. Shoudn't realize was a tip until like I just started talking to other people and realizing, oh, a lot of people will just like I'm bored or I'm procrastinating, let me look on my favorite site and see, like what kind of deals they got going on. So I just don't do that. I avoid it. I also just like avoid going to the store. So if that tip can help you, great, find something else to look

up online. You know, it doesn't mean that you can't be on the internet, but maybe research something that you're curious about. I've gotten real curious about honey Bees. So much interesting information there. So if you want to get started somewhere, just you know, learn more about honey bees. Also, my next tip, shop the perimeter of the grocery store. I stay out of the middle. The middle is where typically most of the unnecessary items are shopping. The perimeter

gets me my fruit, veggies, bread, dairy products. And that's that's how all I need to live off of meat. Yeah right, that's those are the basics. Those are the nutritional pieces that I need. But not your wavy lace. However, you will catch me getting some chips and getting some frozen pizza. Okay, I am still human. You might find me down those aisles, but in general, I'm just in the perimeter. That helps. Also, I do a review of my cart. I'm talking about physical shopping at this point.

If I am physically shopping and I physically have a car, I do a review of it before check out. Of Okay, is there anything in here that it just kind of like looked cool but now at second glance like I don't actually need this thing? And so this this blends into my next tip, which is a self check. I do a do I need it? Can I make it? Can I find it less expensive? Those are some of my go to decision tree questions that I ask myself and a lot of times that can help me weed out. Also,

I have found patients. Patience is a virtue. We know that. But if I can be patient on something usually that does allow me to have like get the deal, but also just to be looking around at all the different places for that thing. And because I've had a list as I'm out and about, I'm able to keep checking. Like when I say I have a list, I have a grocery list, and then I also have a here's what's on my radar to purchase for the home list.

It does not mean I need it right now. Does not mean the next time I go to the store, I'm getting that thing. It's just a helpful reminder. When I am at the store, do I happen to come across this thing? Is it a good deal? So the price point that I was hoping to pay for it. Just as an example, we've known the type of dishwasher that we want to get for our kitchen. It's been on our radar, but we know we don't want to pay full price for it, so we've just been keeping

an eye on on it. Anytime we're at Lows or home depot or sometimes you know, we'll check out the dented appliances. Anyhow, long story short, we've just been patient and I caught it in the clearance aisle way in the back back of Lowes for like sixty percent off and we were able to snag it. Was a steel for you. Yeah, but it's because we've been in our house for a full year and we're just waiting on the dishwasher we want. In the meantime, I've been the dishwasher,

got really good forearms strength because of it. And finally, here's my final trick and tip is if I feel stressed, like I've learned to assess and evaluate and know what some of the signals inside my body me. And this might sound dramatic, but sometimes I can feel stressed a little sweaty, a little uneasy inside myself when I'm about to make a purchase. I have learned don't ignore that, don't just push through it. It's usually a sign I'm not at piece about buying that thing, I don't actually

want to buy it. I feel so much more relief putting it back on the shelf and walking out the door. So just just paying attention to that and not being like no, no, no no, I think I wanted I think I really want to buy it, and allowing that adrenaline to kind of move me towards the purchase. I've worked towards allowing it to move me away from the purchase, and I've not been disappointed yet. Nice. What about for you, Jen, Well,

my list is a little shorter, so I used UM. So. When we were paying off debt, I definitely was triggered by the social media thing. We were newly weds and a lot of our friends were newly weds, so you know, I mean, if you've been around newlywed do you know what happens that two income household comes in and you get in new cars, you buy in a house, upgrading

your wardrobe, taking a vacation. And so it felt like all of my friends were doing that during the two year span that we were paying off debt, and so I was either get off a face like either I leave or you leave. And I wasn't leaving because Facebook was all I had. So I had to unfollow quite a few friends that are good friends. They are still to this day, my very good friends. I just didn't want to see what they were doing. I didn't want to know, to be clear, un following on social media

is different from cutting someone, right, You just don't. You no longer see those things in your news feed unless you intentionally go to that person's profile and you can turn it off and follow them again, which I do so because you know, I want them to see my vacation photos. Now. No, the life I've been able to have now that I'm deaf free. Yeah, but so I had to do that. I had no shame, and I still I mean tell people like you can do that.

That's an option. You can unfollow somebody, so if they follow you, they'll never know that you don't follow them. So that's a key thing that I've learned. And so now I don't use that method. But I I'm really cognizant of decision fatigue and helping my brain make the best decisions possible for as long as possible, because I have realized I'm lazy, like straight up lazy. You are the least lazy person on the pool. When it's things

I don't care about, I'm super lazy. If it's something I care about, like I will work my fingers to the bone. I hurt my pointer finger last week. Like um, no clicking on the mouse, the clicking one. It went numb last week. Jill Um. Yeah, I will work my fingers literally because yeah, I could no longer feel the tip of my finger. And so if I care about it, it's fine. But if it's not something that is, you know, aligned with my highest values, I am disgustingly lazy. Usually

you can ask Travis. So I have to put as many systems in place to make you know, decisions better. So one of the main things for me is avoiding physical clutter so that I can have more space for cognitive energy. That's a big thing for me, clutter. I grew up in a clean home because my dad was a clean and when he died, the house just kind of went to like cluttered, hoarder ruin and so like I kind of have like PTSD from that, and that

stresses me out. And so now I realized that, So my house is not always clean and uncluttered, but I have like fewer things in it so it doesn't get as messy and cluttered because I have a two year old, like, and you know, cleaning is not my core value. So I just put those barriers into place and bring as few things into my house as possible so that that level of mess and clutter never gets to a level that stresses me out and makes me like unable to

make wise decisions. I think this is probably the case for a lot of people, and definitely, I'm not going to say everybody, but our physical space does bear weight on our mental capacity cities, emotional capacities, relational capacities, and so even keeping a pulse on how your environment is impacting you and then what steps can you make to be able to free up some of that because it is going to make a difference and it's going to impact all of these other areas. So you're definitely not

alone in that. That is a really helpful insight. I think. Yeah, so that's I mean, that's the end of my list. That's a good one, though, you picked the good ones. I just say I shopped the perimeter of the grocery store. I geek out on this like spending psychology, like not all of psychology in general, but just spending psychology. I am a nerd. Yeah, I can research it and click my finger to the button about it. Thanks for listening everyone. We want to thank you for your kind re views

on iTunes and Stitcher like this one. It's from Sarah shot saw Chuck. Mhm happens to be five stars, says my favorite podcast. Jen and Jill are the lovely, friendly and knowledgeable hosts of this podcast about frugality and living and intentional life. They share great tips around saving money, investing, minimalism, and getting the most out of your life, but without being preachy or unrealistic. It is truly inspirational and has helped me rethink my approach in a number of areas.

Thank you, Thank you, Sara saw Chuck. That's a really beautiful review that you've left for us. I'm so glad to hear that this has been beneficial for you and that we're not preaching at you are offering unrealistic things. I definitely don't want to preach at anybody. Nobody. Yeah, nobody hears trying to be a preacher, but we're glad that we've allowed you space to rethink traditional approaches. Not is really our goal. So we also want to thank

our friends who share these episodes on social media. When you share are it, you get the word out to more people that you can rethink your approach to finances and there is space for freedom and not just guilt and shame in spending and money. So when you tag us on Facebook or Instagram the latest episode, we are going to add you to our monthly drawing. For every five tags and reviews we get every month, we are

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Frugal Friends is produced by Air Experiality. I can't get over you calling yourself lazy, and I would love to know where you think that's accurate about yourself. I mean, I get that your work yourself to the bone and you see that. But what are you talking about, because right now you've got the rubber liners of your food storage containers soaking and bleach Like. If that's not like going the extra mile, I don't know what it is.

I'm not physically sitting there soaking them in bleach. But you've done it, like you've taken you looked like they were okay. But like there's a lot of people would just a lazy person like would say, who cares, I'd rather lay down. I would rather lay down, yes, but but you still did it. I don't understand. How do you see that that descript or word. So here's the thing, and this isn't I can't give you a specific thing, but I do just want to put out there that

I love to sit at home and watch TV. And I am not like a constant go getter, Like I don't want to give people the wrong impression about me. I am in Anyograham three and I do love to achieve and find much of my self worth for better or for worse, in achieving. But I also do like to sit in my bed and watch TV more so than like read a book, um you and the rest

of the world. I just yeah, I just want to like I I don't want people to think okay, But then you say that, and I think that what you actually mean is like one hour a week, you have a show that you watch and it's like a treat to you. That is like typically the newest show the opposite of lazy, Like sometimes I like to give me myself a break by watching a show I don't like. If you're not going to give people the wrong impression,

I'm going to give them the right impression. It is that you're just a go getter in every aspect of life. And that's that's okay. Everyone doesn't have to be that way. But I also don't want people to think like you're just sitting around watching TV, because I've also been with you while you're watching TV, and you're also working, you're also researching, you're also like posting things to the business

social media. Just let's just be real here. And and if it's not that you're like taking care of your son while you're watching TV, like who knows, let's just be realistic, Jen, Lazy cannot be a word to describe you. My brain sometimes gets lazy when it's tired, and sometimes I get take out, and that is okay. It's okay to have a lazy brain, is really what I was trying to say. Okay, Well, we're all human. You're human,

I'm human. Everyone listening to this as human, And you know, I think we should just all avoid the word lazy, I think, do any of us any good. It's unanimous. We avoid that word and we just find psychological techniques to better our brains, and we give our brains grace. Amen,