Episode four sixty seven, How to Find a financial mentor with Anthony O'Neil.
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast, where you'll learn to save money, embrace simplicity, and live your life. Here your hosts Jen and Jill.
Welcome to the Frugal Friends podcast. My name is Jen, my name is Jill, and today we are speaking with Anthony O'Neill about mentorship, relationships, all these fun things that you don't typically know him for, but he has a lot of wisdom on this is.
A concept we really haven't covered. We talk about community, we talk about kind of ways to find the information that you're looking for that will actually be beneficial and sound advice, but we haven't really dialed in on how do we find our people? And Anthony is the one to ask about this. He has found this mentor, I am sure he does mentor others, and so he's got a lot of insight that I think will really be inspirational to you all.
Yeah, but first, this episode is brought to you by decking the halls. No, not punching a hole in a wall. Okay, I know where you thought this was going.
Oh lashin, I love that pun, but actually.
Decking the halls with an amount of decor that feels right for you and not too much just because you're being influenced by social media. And one of the things you should be including in your hall decking is our new book by What you Love without going Broke. It is very easy to just slip into your next Amazon purchase. It will show up to your house in January right
when you need it. Hopefully you won't need it, but hopefully you're buying it to support this mission to make this book accept as accessible as possible to the droves of other people who do really really need it. So you can go to buy What you Love book dot com and pre order it from your favorite retailer. I am so stoked for you guys to have this in your hands so soon, in just a few weeks. It is wild. So buy what you Love book dot com.
I am really just chuckling over here about possibly introducing a new tradition, a new holiday tradition of just punching my walls.
Punching the wall.
Yeah, I love it.
Solaly member that does that traditionally, but not like intentionally. But there's every year someone in their family punches a wall.
And now we can just view it as a traditional way of bringing the cheer of the season.
Yeah, it's just a good holiday starter. But you know who is not decking any halls, Who's not punching any walls? For sure? Anthony O'Neill, who is just the sweetest. He is a number one national best selling author of Debt Free Degree, and he is the popular podcast and YouTube host of the Table. And he has a fantastic passion for people. He wants to help break generational wealth gaps
build true wealth. And his upcoming book is named is titled Take Your Seat at the Table, Live an Authentic Life of abundance, wellness and freedom, and it comes out a week after ours. So maybe you'll find yourself pre ordering both. I don't know, it's up to you.
Why not and you'll yeah, you'll learn. When it comes to financial financial mentorship, books can be an excellent resource and you can really find what works for you. I think our message is we did not vary to say that are very aligned and I think they can be congruent. I don't think you just have to pick one podcast one book, So yeah, get them both.
Try it out.
But let's get into it. Let's hear what Anthony has to say.
Anthony, Welcome to the Frugal Friends Podcast. We're so excited to have you.
Oh, Jan Jill, thank y'all so much for having me on. I have been looking forward to this interview, so I'm looking forward to it. Y'are Tobe, And they'll be some screaming halfway through, so I'm looking forward to hear how this screaming is going to go.
Oh, it's yelling, but yeah, maybe maybe borderline screaming. Yeah, yeah, we're ready. We're really excited for it. But before that, we are so thrilled to have you here, and we love the way in which you are making finances accessible, relatable, fun, and particularly your concept of the table. It's the title of your YouTube channel, which is awesome and kind of the idea that this gives about community and relationships and
the ways in which we gather. So with that kind of in mind, we're curious if you can start us off with sharing a little bit about how we might be able to find some sound financial mentorship to kind of bring to our metaphorical table the places we gather.
This is a good question.
I remember jail, when I was homeless, sleeping in the back of my car, and all that I saw was my mom and dad, both sets in my parents. I have four parents, and I saw them literally struggling in a middle class perspective, right, And I was like, okay, wait, I'm seeing rich people have everything that they desire and I'm seeing my parents struggle. Like I'm not trying to be filthy rich, but I don't want that neither.
But I saw it.
I was like, man, I can't I can't touch them because they don't know me from Adam and Eve. Like, I just can't walk up to them and say, hey, you know, how did you do it? Because they just wouldn't respond. Then I couldn't ask my parents for help because you know, they didn't know how to get to where I wanted to go.
They just knew how to survive.
So one of the very first things that I think a lot of people take for granted is to literally look for mentorship through podcasts and books.
Right.
So you don't have to touch a gin and jail to be mentored by a gin in jail. The simple fact that you're listening to the podcast, you're getting the mentorship. The problem is that I see with a lot of people is well, listen to the plot to the podcast, get the wisdom, but we won't apply the wisdom. And so that's where mentorship is effective. Mentorship is not effective just because I can talk to Jen and Jail. Mentorship is effective when I can apply with Jen and Jill
is teaching me. This is why y'all need to get their new book that's coming out in January. This is why I need to constantly listen to you their podcast because Jen and Jill our experience and what they're doing and what they're teaching. So mentorship for me is I think a lot of us get hung up on. If you want to be a basketball player, you would love to be mentored by Lebron James. If you want to be you know, jet free. Some people would love to
be mentored by Dave Ramsey for an example. If you want to be a preacher, like in my culture, a lot of us want to go to Bishop such and such, right and for me, I think the key thing that people should do is pick up the book, get a podcast, and then apply with their teaching. Now before we go on there and say this and not be quiet, because y'all, I'm a black preacher. So we can talk a lot, so y'all got to cut me off when y'all ready
for me to be quiet. Make sure that you do the research on the individual who's saying that they know what they're doing. Because there's a lot of YouTubers right now, especially with chat GPT, everyone can just be this expert, and so you got to make sure that you taste and try the fruit of what they're teaching. If they're saying, hey, I've gotten out of debt, or this is how you get out of debt. Are they debt free? Hey, this is how you build a million dollars? Do they have
a million dollars? And do they have fruit? Do they have proof of what they're teaching? And if they don't have fruit and they don't have proof, then that's not a mentor you need to submit yourself to. So that'd be the very first thing we could go deeper into it. But I tell everyone, man, pick up a book, read the book, and then apply the knowledge. Getting wisdom without applying the knowledge, you just gave them a listening ear with no application.
Yeah, it's such a good point. I think we often think we've got to find people within our immediate network and that's what's so great about the Internet. There's bros and cons to it, but there's so much information out there. One of the things we talk about is this Japanese concept of shoehi follow the rules, break the rules, transcend the rules, and how it is so important to identify who are we following first before we try and willy nilly this thing all over the place and find ourselves
in a situation we never intended to be in. But I think you're hitting on something really important of how to find those people. So I'm curious that if you have any more pointers there on if I am thinking, okay, great books and podcasts, make sure that they're implementing what they say they're implementing anything even before that, of who to look for? Where am I? Where am I finding these people? What's a good place to start? How do I research them?
Yeah?
Yeah, so one of the good places you can start is within your immediate circle. For an example, I couldn't go to my parents on how to build wealth, how to build a million dollars. I couldn't go to my best friends on how to do certain things. But here's what I have found is that everybody in my life has something good about them. So I can go to Jill and say, Jill, I want to learn this one
specific thing from you. Can you help me with this? Now, Jen, you have this one specific thing, can I learn this from you? And then Anthony, I want to learn this one specific thing from me. I will learn that next thing.
You know, you have everything that you've been looking for, but you went different places to get it within your immediate circle, right, And so I think for us, let's identify who's in our immediate circle that has some level of intellect that can help me in certain areas of my life that will get me to my end goal. When you are looking for mentorship, the key thing is what are they mentoring you on? And I tell this
to everybody, even including myself. Before you can get a mentor, identify the mission because the mentor helps you get to the mission quicker. And so if you don't know clearly where you're going, okay, listen, your thing could be I want to pay off. I want to be debt free in twenty twenty five, and I want to save ten thousand dollars in emergency fund, and I want to get married and be able to pay can ask for our wedding cool.
That is a mission that is a vision for your life.
Now, Jill may have an experience on how to budget, Jim may have experience on, you know, how to deal with a husband when he's pissing you off. You know, there's different areas where you can get mentorship from different people, but you won't know what to look for if you
don't have a clear direction of where you're going. And when we have a clear direction of the vision and a mission that is assigned for our lives, then from there we can identify who do we need to invite to our table, to our lives, who can help us? And when you do that, it's honestly easier to find mentors, identify books, identify podcasts to do it. Oftentimes I'll see something in gim like, yo, I want that, but is
that even helping me with my own vision? And so we'll have all these people speaking into our lives with no clarity on where we're going.
That's so wise to first figure out where you want to go. And some there's always the shiny objects shiny person syndrome. I guess where you're wanting something that a quality that someone else has, but like really taking into consideration if it takes you to where you personally want to go, how do you start those conversations? How do you start to bring those people to your table when you've identified somebody that has a quality that in your real life that you want.
Yeah, just recently did it, so everyone knows that I did seven eight years with I believe one of the gurus himself, Dave Ramsey. When it comes to the personal finance space, I stepped out because I wanted to specifically speak to the minority community and the less fortunate communities.
And when I stepped out, I had a clear vision. Hey, I want to help everyone become debt free, but I want to take all the wisdom and knowledge that I've been able to gain over the last fifteen years and go into minority schools, less fortunate schools, low grade schools, and bring this financial knowledge to these young people, but then also help minorities get out of debt, etc.
Etc.
And I said, Okay, now that I have that vision, I need to identify people in that area. For example, one of the leading voices when it comes to minority communities was back in two thousand and eight, and his name was Lee Jenkins. He's in his mid sixties now and Pastor Lee Jenkins stopped doing the financial space to go into the Christian space to.
Be a pastor.
And so I found them and I was like, man, you're in the spiritual world, in the Christian faith world. You have a financial degree. You were a CFA, not CFA, I'm sorry, a Certified Financial Advisor CFAES. And I said, man, I'm doing that. I'm back in school, sir. I literally just hit him up on Instagram. I said, hey, sir, love what you're doing. And I said, I am back in school to get my MBA and I'll be completed
with that here but the the next year. I have a heart for the minority community community, but I'm also a Christian and I want to come from that perspective in the biblical space. I'm going to be in your area. I was wondering if I could treat you to lunch for an hour and I will even pay for the lunch to compensate for your time. Can I just get some wisdom from you? He didn't hit me back. I replied to him like a week later and he said, Hey,
when you're in town, hit me up. And we've been able to form a mentorship relationship simply by telling him, listen, I won't take up much of your time. I will pay for lunch. This is what I'm doing, this is what I've accomplished, but this is where I want to go.
And you've done that.
And the key thing for me, what I want to tell everyone is when I first met with him, I was quiet. I didn't say nothing. I didn't try to impress him. I didn't try and say, yeah, I got a number one national best selling book. That doesn't mean nothing. One hour of his time. He is there to help me. And because of that, he said, I want to keep
this relationship going. That relationship now has become and what we call in our community like a spiritual father and spiritual son perspective, Like he guides me on this journey and he's helping me understand and grow more. But what got me there was I reached out to him via Instagram and I told him what I'm doing. I said, hey, I will I'm not going to waste your time. I'm not asking for a phone call. No, I'm going to fly into your city and I'm going to sit down
with you for lunch. And I just want to listen, and y'all, I had two ears and two eyes and one mouth for a reason. I only talked when he asked me a question. But other than that, I was listening to body language and I was listening to the words, and I had two hands. I was writing down as much as I possibly could, because I can't take this opportunity lightly. That this why man who is respected within my community, in my space, who does the same thing as me, is willing to coach me and mentor me.
And one of the things I think oftentimes that our generation, as we are younger, do is we want to impress people. We want to go in there and talk about, Yeah, I got a podcast, I got this many listeners, and I'm doing this and I'm doing that doesn't mean nothing to a mentor because he's already accomplished what you've accomplished. Maybe you've accomplished something different, but that person has already built what you're trying to build. I say this respectfully.
It's not a cust word, but someone us need to shut up, just shut up and just listen, get the wisdom so that we can apply it in our lives and watch this. Because of that, he's connected me with other people because he knows I want to listen and watch way more than I want to talk and impress. And my impression comes from just listening and taking what he says, and he sees me doing it in my real life. And so that's what I would say on
how to start a conversation. It's just walk up to them and say, hey, listen, this is what I want to do. You've done it, sir, You've done it, ma'am. Can I treat you to lunch? Can I treat you to coffee? Heck, I'll come by your office and bring donuts. I'll take thirty minutes of your time, and I'm going to make sure that it's worth your time, because, believe this or not, y'all mentors want to sew back. They
just don't want to waste their time. You see, money to certain mentors, Like for me right now, money is not a problem. I can make money. I can replace money. I cannot replace my time. And I know that about wiser and more successful people than myself. They can make the money, but they can't get their time back. So I got to make sure that when I have their time,
I'm not wasting it. And they feel fulfilled as well, because they sold into someone younger, someone not as successful as them, and they gave that person their time and their wisdom, and so their reward for that time is seeing the fruit inside of me. Now, if I take all their wisdom go out and in the world RUMs and ah, I forget it and don't try it, don't apply it. I've wasted their time. I'll never see them again.
And so that's how it would start that conversation. I gave you a little bit more than how to start it. I gave you how to start it and how to keep it. But the how to start it, it's just literally leave with humility. Go in there and be the dumbest person in the room. When I say the dumbest, I'm not saying you're dumb, but at like you don't know ask more than you actually tell. And I learned
that from my friend Dave and other successive people. They will ask me questions that they somewhat already knew the answer to, but they're like, no, I'm asking because you may give me a different perspective that I may have missed. So I've learned to ask questions even if I know the answer. He may give an answer that his answer could make me think differently about something I'm doing in my life, and that's how I.
Would Yeah, that's so wise.
I love what you're describing here. When it comes to relationships and specifically mentorship. I think there's a lot of vulnerability here that we are really putting ourselves out there and asking somebody for something, and that is always a little bit scary. But I think when we can really identify they have something that I want that would really benefit me, and here's what I can also give back, so that there's some degree of reciprocity here that we
can make it worth their wild. But along those lines, when we're looking at community, you've really described well what it can mean for us when we find people who are going to be beneficial pouring into our lives. Kind of sewing back. But there's a lot to say here about the ways in which community relationships impact our finances,
probably for better or worse. What would you say about this, Anthony, when it comes to kind of taking inventory about who's at our table, who we want to be at our table? What do you see are the impacts of community on finances?
You know, I want I want to want to go back to something you said, Jill, because I mean, I think I think your audience need to really hear that you got to be vulnerable if you're going to build wealth in some form of fashion, if you're going to get if you're going to have a mentor, you can't be afraid to be ashamed because they're there to help you.
Become unashamed that they're there to help you grow and evolve and become better, and they can't help you do that if you're not vulnerable enough to show them your weaknesses, to show them your flaws, to show them, hey, this is where I need help at If you want to build wealth, if you want frugal friends to to help you get out of the living page at the paycheck, you got to come to the table and put everything out on the table.
Yeah. I think that can be so helpful when we can have somebody else to look at the thing with us. I think when it comes to our finances and we know that we want to get it in order, but we don't even know what we're going to find. Sometimes having somebody else who's able to be there with us to walk us through it, even if it's going to be vulnerable, a little scary. You're not going into it alone,
and sometimes that can help us. But yeah, I'm curious that flip side too of what do we need to be looking for when it comes to who might be in our lives that is not helping us financially? What would you recommend there?
Yeah, I will say I remember when I was getting out of getting out of debt.
Actually, no, let me I mean, yeah, let me do this story, let me do this, let me do this. Right, it's cool. It's a real good one.
And I got to say in a way twitter not offensive or offended, but it's my truth in this season of my life. Right, we've been able to build a great business and one of my friends there was this lot that came available for me to buy because my dream is to always live on a golf course or on the water. Where a lot came available, it's like a million dollars for it. I said, oh, I'm gonna
go get it. Might go get it. When my friends he was, yeah, bro, go get it, man, cause we can have parties out there, we can ball out, we can bite all the ladies.
And I'm like, that's not what you do on the golf course.
Right, you know.
So I'm like, huh. I went back to my mentor, and my mentor said, that's dumb. It's just you and a black dog in this house. You don't need a ten thousand square foot house. That's more electricity for what. You're only five five boy, you ain't that big.
You'll need all that space. What's roaded?
You're the money guy, what's roading? I go back and I tell my friend it's like, oh, man, bump that guy.
He don't know. We could turn up, bro, Do you know what can happen? Like he was.
He was pushing me this way, and my mentor is saying, listen, don't listen to me, but your money is going to tell you that is a poor decision. Your friend is not telling you what to do with your money. My friend is telling me how we can turn up. Now, I'm not saying he's not a good friend, but I did tell him, you're not holding me accountable to the vision and to the goals.
That I have for my life.
So you're no longer invited in that space of my life. But when I'm ready to go out to the beach and turn up, bro, come with me.
You're gonna be the life of the party.
But when it comes to building something up substance, I need even speaking into your life before you even speak into mine, because I'm the one that's over here living this lifestyle. Not saying that I'm perfect or better than you, but I told you what I'm trying to do with my life, and the first thing you said was let's turn up. We could turn up. You never asked me, well, hey, does this help you with your goals, with your vision
for your life. I remember you telling me that you know you wanted to buy a house in gon To, Africa, you wanted to, you know, build a studio for your your company, because it's going to derail you or slow you down from your goals and your visions. And so for me, simply simply said, simple said to answer your question. You know you have the wrong people in your community in your life. Now, I'm not saying get rid of them completely, but I have like different level of friends.
Friends who are just cool, what's up, We're friends. But I have those close what I call them covenant brothers and sisters, that they know exactly where I'm going, what I'm doing, and where I'm struggling with and they hold me accountable to get to that goal and to get over that struggle. And if you want, if your friends are always telling you to forget about it, you know you only live once. You know you're young, enjoy life turned up, don't worry about it. It's not that serious.
Those are the friends you need to get out of your inner circle and just keep them on the outside when you do just want to have a good weekend, a good night, and just have a good time. But if you're looking to really build something of substance. All of my wealthy friends, all of my millionaire friends, man, their inner circle is small, but they're also very impactful because that inner circle is not allowing them to mismanage,
to mislead and watch this, to mismeasure. So when I say mismeasure as far as in you can't manage what you don't measure. And so my friends help me measure my success, measure my accomplishments, measure what's going on throughout the year. And as we're measuring, we're identifying, Okay, what you're doing, is it working and is it getting you closer to your goal? And if it's not, my friends like, Hey, we need to kind of reposition ourselves.
I can appreciate that we're not getting rid of friends, We're just identifying where can we fit them into our lives and where in what ways are we benefiting them too? Right, they've got to do their own inventory as well. But how does this make sense for the goals that I have and in what way do I want to be interacting? In what way do I have to shift some of these patterns? But you know something that we don't have to shift ever. It's a pattern that we are absolutely
going to keep every single time. The bill.
That's right, it's time for the best minute of your entire week. Maybe a baby was born and his name is William. Maybe you've paid off your mortgage. Maybe your car died and you're happy to not have to pay that bill anymore. That's bills, Buffalo bills, Bill clion, this.
Is the bill of the weekend.
Ah, there it is there, It is Anthony. Every week we yell at our listeners and our guests and we ask them to contribute a very important part of the growth of this show, the bill of the week, And we would love to hear yours.
Man, the bill of the week.
I've been thinking about this because I heard it on the podcast before, and I think the bill of the week, a fun one, which is a real one, is I have a hot date this weekend, and that's a bill.
That is going to be a whole bill. It's better to be a whole bill.
It's all I know is that it's gonna be a whole bill. I haven't been out on a date in a long time, and so I'm looking forward to this bill. This is one of those bills I'm like, Okay, let's go, let's I'm ready to pay this one.
So I'm looking looking forward.
What are you gonna do? What's gonna what's gonna be on that bill?
Yeah?
Well, so the bill and on this bill is a flight, it's a hotel room, and then we're gonna do a comedy show, and then we're gonna do dinner.
And so I'm looking for.
A John and I are a big comedy show and dinner, girls, those.
Are first from a lady's perspective, Is it the comedy show, comedy show first, then dinner or is it dinner then comedy show?
Usually dinner than comedy show. But that's a little bit more because comedy shows start at like.
Yeah, it depends on what time the show starts. And also I just go to bed really early because now I'm old.
I want to laugh and then I want to fall asleep.
That's true, that's true. I'm looking forward to it. So yeah, I think that's the plan, is dinner first and then at the comedy show. And I just got to prepare myself because I know we're sitting on the front, so we're gonna get roasted.
Oh care to share who you're going to see? Or is this is I can't.
Remember the name. It's a local. It's a local comedian there.
Cool, excellent. If you all listening have a bill that you want to share, if it has to do with a hot date, a bill you don't mind paying a bill you're just going to rack up because you've saved up for it, or your name is Bill. You know you know what we want Frugal Friends podcast dot com slash bill leave it for us, and now it's time for we do our own side effects here here.
Yeah, the side effects we do.
All our tell me come from y'all. I appreciate it.
Yeah, we we are a large podcast, but we are still humble enough to do our own sound.
You got to cut the budgets somewhere. You know, the sound effects were really going to put us over the edge.
So I love it all right. So who is somebody that's positively impacted how you manage your finance?
Says?
You can say them by name or not, But.
Yeah, I mean, I think there's no secret, man. I think Dave Ramsey is probably the most influential and most impactful person in my life when it comes to how I manage my money. I took Financial Peace University back in two thousand and eight, and it changed my life on how I saw money Now. I do things differently now. But I would say he's played the most.
We've We've similarly commented. Both Jen and I had done Financial Peace University, but we totally shoot how I read that thing. We followed those rules. It did something for us. We send the rules and then we transcended the rules. So here we are the water's warm. Uh for me? I would say, Jen, one right here sitting next to me, I mean, can you what else can I point to that has made such a difference in my life?
And I actually might be offended if you'd said someone else.
Yeah, so true.
You know, I'd be real it would have been someone else. I'm like, oh really, okay this after the podcast.
Exactly, Yeah, truly it's Jen. I would not have done this podcast without her. I would not have roth. I r A without without you. You you my you, my financial ride or die right now maybe my life writer or die will TV.
So mine is my husband, Travis not might be a little, a little deal.
I see how she did. I know it was.
I know here the relationship.
In you signs right now?
Now, Jan did it right for her house? She was like, she ain't by the miss up my house. It's my husband.
It's a little bit of a cop out answer. But I do think like he was the one that inspired me to believe that paying off our debt was possible. We had seventy eight thousand dollars of debt. He was the one that the first values based spending or values based goals experience I've ever had was with him when he said, what do you want from life? And how can you get it faster? And that's how I came
to believe that paying off debt was possible. So I gotta I gotta say Travis definitely is responsible for the money I make now. Without Jill would not have an income. So positive around We'll talk mm hmm.
It never feels good when you're more into somebody else than they are into you. And you know what, I'll work through it. Anthony, this has been so lovely. Can you tell people where they can get more from you? How how they can engage in your wisdom?
Jill?
Before I said, I just want to say, my friend, I'm praying for you.
It's gonna take podcast together. Now, it's gonna take more than you, Anthony. How big is your prayer team?
Jill? I got a big one.
I got a big one because I mean, this relationship right here may not last the way she she may leave you for her husband.
I'm just gonna let you know right now, Dear Heavenly Father Tom.
He wouldn't start a podcast.
Oh man, I love it.
No, I talk too much for him. I have to have Jill. I need Jill.
I love it, I love it, love love man.
Listen, y'all are generals and movers and shakers in this financial space. Thank you all for your podcast and what you're contributing to the community is needed. And I'm just
happy that I was able to grace y'all's podcast. I need to get y'all on my podcast whenever we have time, so that way y'all can talk about your new and exciting book that's coming up, because we need all the information out there that's going to help us win with our finances, and so for your community to learn more about me and my new book, Take your seat at the Table, how to live an authentic life based around abundance,
wellness and freedom. You can go to Anthony Nail dot com and you'll see all the information there on how you can register the book and the book is I think oftentimes us in the money space, we will write like that, hey invest and do this and do that, which is a great book. I have that book coming out here in about two years. But I want to start from the foundation because every wealthy person that I am connected to, their mindset is totally different and how
they position and set up their life. It's a foundation of how they build their wealth and how they're able to multiply their wealth. And so I took all of that information and I turned it in, Hey, how do we take a seat at the head of our table? How do we take control of our lives and build the foundation to build something marvelous and just magnificent on and so this book is going to be a life transformation.
This is the book that allowed me to go from seeping in the back of my car to having a seventh figure mindset before I had a seventh figure net worth. And so I think this is what everyone needs to get. And it just meant a lot that you all would allow me to come on your show have some fun with you all. I do apologize that it was me that brought out the discrepancy within this relationship.
You're bringing to the surface that yeahs, and that's good and you're.
Strong enough to address it. So thank you so much. Anthony Grugal Friends is produced by Eric Sirianni. I loved that conversation around financial mentorship, something I wish we had gotten into. Anthony had to hop on an interview like very quickly after ours. But if I could have added one more thing, I would have loved to talk about
how do you become a financial mentor for someone? Because I think we need both, right, we need our own financial mentors, but we also need to be pouring into the people around us in safe spaces and figuring out those safe spaces and not be afraid, like to be breaking the rules and transcending the rules. Obviously not going into early where we're like mentoring people and things we
don't know what we're talking about. But yeah, getting to that point where we are helping our communities learn what we have learned.
Yeah, exactly. And that's an interesting one because I really do think, as I'm considering it now, that it should be and you should be asked. I think maybe I could be swayed in another direction, but I think it is better to be approached than to potentially approach and be like, I think you need me to speak into your life and tell you what to do with things that but like offshore. But I think some of it, though,
is making yourself available for that. Yeah. Something that I've been noticing more and more recently is people utilizing our Instagram account to reach out with their questions or emails. People will respond to the friend letter and just ask us quite. I mean, like Anthony said, I think just this podcast and the book is something. It is. It is a guide, which essentially is what a mentor is, but that there still are opportunities to even get more
individualized and dial in. Of course, we can't give hours and hours to everybody, but I do enjoy it and it does feel like, Okay, we're able to keep helping people to even greater degrees when they're able to reach out to us through email or a DM and say here's what I'm facing. What are your specific thoughts on this, because we're the ones who they've begun to trust, and
so where else do you go? Then if you've got a really specific question, but to the people that you've begun to trust and approach them, it's up to us to say yes or no. And of course anybody else out there who has found themselves in a place where they might be able to turn around to the next person and help them take the next few steps. What we say, what we commit to, what we're willing to do.
But yeah, I think it's a combination of having done the thing, having done the work, and making sure people know that you are willing to be a resource for others and that just comes through connection.
Yeah, absolutely, thank.
You, well, thank you, yeah, thanks everyone for listening. We hope that this was an encouraging one. We hope that you are feeling a little bit more motivated and inspired to be vulnerable. To find those people in your life who you'd love to learn a little bit more from. Just ask them. They might say no, but us.
And remember, vulnerability without protection leads to exploitation, so make sure it's a safe person.
Yeah, yes, well said Jen. Thank you all so much for listening, and thank you for those of you who have left us a kind review like this one from Carolyn and Curtis titled very Helpful and Interesting five stars. I just discovered this podcast and listened to the episode about getting free stuff. I've been in a bye and Nothing group for a couple of years, and their explanation
of the concept was perfect. I really appreciated all the other sources given and the way these two women are friendly, super normal and chill, fun, well informed and interesting to listen to. Carolyn and Curtis, thank you. Wow are you saying this?
Yes?
Chill, fun, well and for sure super normal, super normal and chill. That's what I'm drilling in on, is super normal. Anytime somebody says that about me, I'm here for it.
Yeah, thank you, Yeah, thank you so much. Guys. If you enjoyed the show, please take a minute to leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify. It helps potential new listeners know what our show is all about and that we are super normal and chill.
See you next time. I love that Anthony thinks that there's probably beef here with us, and while I want to pretend like there is, we all knew. All of us knew, right, even you who are still here listening. You're the real deal. You knew I was gonna say Jen, Jen was going to say not me. I didn't exactly know who it would be, but I knew it wasn't gonna be me.
Ah, you are responsible for my income, Jill. You have a positive impact on my finances.
Now, Yeah, agreed, No, and I need it to be me. That's not no. You helped.
I know you're strong enough, you're super normal enough and chill enough that you don't need it to be you, because you know how important you are to me.
Yes, No, yeah, I do. And we're contractually obligated to each other, so you are. You can't ruin this thing. How we it's how we heat our house.
Very expensive if I do, if I do mess it up, yeah, very expensive. So much like my marriage.
Listen, we're coming up on seven years. I mean, we're still a few months away.
We just had been seven million downloads.
Uh huh, we got seven million downloads on the pod, probably more than that by this point, but by the time this releases, and yeah, we're about to help seven years. We do kind of track now at this point, like another million for every year that we're that we're doing it. Yeah, we're in the sevens. We've reached completion and perfection.
I don't know, we still have like six months before we hit our seven year mark.
Well, it's December now and April January favors. I'm on the timeframe of when it really Okay. I'm just saying, jen aur aniversary is coming up. You're gonna have to think about it, acknowledge it, and don't get itchy.
I will not get itchy for this reason, I assure you.
I wonder if the seven year itch applies to businesses or if that's only marriages. You said that we are kind of married.
When I had my seventh wedding anniversary, and you're like, oh, it's the seven year itch, and I didn't feel itchy at all.
So great, let's hope that that so. I don't think I'm going to feel itchy with you. Thank you. Likewise, I never got I'm just very chill.
I'm very normal. I'm very chill, and I'm.
Not itchy, fun, well informed. Yeah, we're on cloud nine with that review.
I know. It's that's why we love your reviews so much. Are you Are you gonna be looking at any Christmas lights into anybody's houses windows?
Not not in the way that you are. I'm gonna go that deep like again, I'm not bringing my binoculars, but yeah, I am gonna drive around see what I can find good.
What do you think you're gonna find? Lights?
Maybe a light show? I love those when you can pull up and just park outside and tune into the radio. It still feels like magic to me how you can how radios work and sound waves. I don't understand that I can be in front of somebody's house and just like tune my car to something and it's coming in through the air waves. I think, is that? Am I even saying that right? I don't know.
I don't know. I think it sounds right, sounds right to me.
Yeah, So I think that's fun. That's my That's one of my faves. There's a there's a wild Christmas light display not too far from our house that you get out of your car and you walk on someone's property. It's hinged.
They doing it knows it's unhinged.
That's the thing.
Like if it didn't know it was unhinged by this point, they have to know it's unhinged.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's been there. There has been there my entire life. Yeah, thirty five years.
And it's it's wild. It's a wild experience, but it is a it's a stuffy animal.
Lights, lawn ornaments, things that move, fountain stare at you.
Trains, doll heads, plexiglass, plexi glass, lots of plexi glass. I don't I think it was there before the pandemic. It just got more through the pandemic. Yep.
Yeah, it's uh, it's a thing. And I don't think I've taken my horse.
No, sorry, this is boring to you.
I hit my head, Jill, Okay, I'm yawning. I think that stuff happens when you hit your head, so so sorry.
Okay, well maybe I need it now. Yeah, go rest, Okay, bye,