Jackie brings us a question from her sister (because we know about gender things). Theo has 200 Microsoft Bing points. Rachel makes the case for gay Nick. Topics include: whether or not Nick Carraway is an aphrodisiac, Google vs. Bing, what Gatsby got up to at night as a teen, Nathan Fielder, Bing Boys, the function of holidays, underwear problems, The Room, Griselda the horse, ghosting, and cuddly buddies. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Sep 01, 2022•1 hr 32 min•Season 2Ep. 93
Here is a clip of our Patreon bonus episode this week, covering the fakeness or not-so-fakeness of Shakespeare! To get access to the full episode, go to patreon.com/firethecanon ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Aug 25, 2022•14 min•Season 2Ep. 93
Settle in for a discussion of F. Scott Fitzgerald’s most famous work like you never heard it in school: by three highly distractible people who curse a lot, one of whom hasn’t read the book. We cover the first four chapters (of 9) and give you plenty of fun historical tidbits, like Fitzgerald’s abandoned title ideas, the true meaning of the book, and why there are so many goddamn gin and fruit cocktails everywhere. Rachel advocates the firebombing of Duke University. Jackie frightens a new frien...
Aug 18, 2022•1 hr 30 min•Season 2Ep. 92
Join us as we learn all about F. Scott Fitzgerald in preparation for our upcoming miniseries on The Great Gatsby! This poor guy had quite the wild life, including writing what some consider to be the quintessential American novel (somehow, the tale of rich people in New York City). Through his work, he strove to answer the eternal question: can a poor boy marry a rich girl?!?! Rachel totals a car in a spectacular manner. Jackie debuts her alter egos, B. Scott Berton (the B stands for Beyonce) an...
Aug 11, 2022•1 hr 21 min•Season 2Ep. 91
Today we read and discuss Parts 2 & 3 of The Metamorphosis, the famous tale of Gregor Samsa, a salesman who continues to be a monstrous insect. Theo rests his case. Jackie’s attraction to Kafka is unchanged. Rachel delights in a tadpole apocolypse. Topics include: Beetle Borgs Content warning: some more serious cockroach talk ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Aug 04, 2022•56 min•Season 2Ep. 92
A short preview of our Patreon Bonus episode this month! Theo designed a diabolical quiz game for Rachel and Jackie, who in turn answer diabolical quiz questions. You'll never guess who won... ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Jul 28, 2022•10 min•Season 2Ep. 91
Today we read and discuss Part 1 of The Metamorphosis, the famous tale of Gregor Samsa, a salesman who awakens one morning to find himself transformed into some sort of monstrous insect. Theo gives himself an award. Jackie flails around like a Muppet, as usual. Rachel runs the gamut of hellish experiences at Heathrow Airport. Topics include: Jackie’s feelings towards her great-grandfather, our largest demographic, Amburgers & Wootbeer, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Stephen on the road, German bre...
Jul 21, 2022•1 hr 16 min•Season 2Ep. 89
If you enjoy hearing people talk about the life of author Franz Kafka, have we got a treat for you! In this episode, Jackie’s the captain now, and she gets a little too into her Kafka research. She delved too greedily and too deep, and is now officially obsessed with old Franz. Now you get to reap the fruits of her labor! Come back next week to hear us talk about Kafka’s most famous novella, The Metamorphosis. Theo becomes the producer.exe. Rachel is on the computers’ side in the coming revoluti...
Jul 14, 2022•1 hr 14 min•Season 2Ep. 90
Sarah Gailey, author of the upcoming book Just Like Home, joins us to talk about one of the most famous American short stories of all time: Shirley Jackson’s 1948 classic, The Lottery. Jackie reveals her long, sordid history with technology. Rachel reads a book review from an alternate reality. Theo discusses an affordable delicacy. Topics include: old houses, cottagecore, rollerblading accidents, park raters, trusting your editor, killing off Chuck, mom texts, Muppet Treasure Island, cicada piz...
Jul 07, 2022•1 hr 18 min•Season 2Ep. 89
You may recall that a few weeks back we briefly discussed how the writer and philosopher Voltaire became a (relative) millionaire. Although we knew it had something to do with scamming the official French government lottery, at the time we believed the answer was, “he bought every lottery ticket.” Rachel has since realized it was a little more complicated than that! Join Jackie and Theo as they learn what to do, and perhaps more importantly what NOT to do, when running a grand scheme back in the...
Jun 30, 2022•10 min•Season 2Ep. 88
Ah, June. The time of year when dads near and far are honored for their contributions to our personhood. We interviewed our dads about our childhoods, and theirs, and some book talk made it in here and there. Technological mishaps abounded, but somehow, fiasco turned fiesta, and the party continues. Henry enjoyed being interviewed by Rachel so much that he insisted upon a second interview. Frank questions the veracity of Theo’s dinosaur facts. Dan buys Jackie a $305 hamster and blows up a doll. ...
Jun 23, 2022•1 hr 53 min•Season 2Ep. 87
Well, well, well, look who we have here - Jackie’s previous poetry professor (and poet), Ross White. We discuss Ross’s favorite poem: Shelley’s badass masterpiece (badassterpiece?), Ozymandias. Rachel insults all poets. Theo therapizes/becomes the executive, legislative, and judicial producer. Jackie continues to have singularly unique experiences. Topics include: Downsizing (2017), tiny things, Breaking Bad, badassery, The Little Prince, Star Wars, really good salads, the eternal American empir...
Jun 16, 2022•1 hr 4 min•Season 2Ep. 86
Here's our episode about the life of Percy Bysshe Shelley! A great writer, a terrible husband, and arguably an even worse father. Although he died at the age of 29, he got an unbelievable amount of living done. Listen in to hear about all the shenanigans he got up to! Jackie breaks the news about her disorder. Rachel tells everyone why the episode is about. Theo wishes he’d said “Get a tomb” instead. Topics include: Shelle’s Belles, Shellow’s Fellows, Shelle’s Angels, Tootsie Pops, Chupa Chups, ...
Jun 09, 2022•1 hr 25 min•Season 2Ep. 85
We finally made it to the second/last episode in our Candide miniseries, and what a long strange trip it’s been. Our hero visits El Dorado, England, and Turkey, gaining and losing money and companions along the way. Will he be reunited with his true love (?) Cunégonde? Will he be reunited with basically everyone he’s met throughout the book? Will he continue to believe that he lives in the best of all possible worlds? Listen in to find out! Jackie brags about her great-great-great grandma Lucy. ...
Jun 02, 2022•1 hr 27 min•Season 2Ep. 84
Well, well, well. Look who decided to join Jackie and Rachel on the right side of 30! That would be Theo, our (actual, this time) birthday boy-producer. In honor of this special day, Rachel decided to give him the greatest gift of all: an idea for a birthday episode that he didn't have to come up with himself. We discuss the children's book My Dog Talks by Gail Herman, an age-inappropriate classic that entered Theo's young life through a series of whimsical events, and critically compare it with...
May 26, 2022•18 min•Season 2Ep. 84
This week we have another very special guest for you all: author Premee Mohamed, just in time for the release of the thrilling conclusion to her Beneath the Rising trilogy, The Void Ascendant. We had a great time chatting with her about Benjamin Franklin, Science Octopus; things that rhyme with Nyarlathotep; the differences between Canada and America; how to tell if something is YA; recycling trends; big ol’ aliens; The Silmarillion; cloning dinosaurs; man-eating plants; Charles Darwin; tips on ...
May 19, 2022•1 hr 39 min•Season 2Ep. 83
This week we have a very special, very cute episode for you all - we interviewed our moms! Well, we each interviewed our respective moms. Buckle up for some cute stories and wide-ranging children’s book opinions. Theo and his mom issue a challenge. Jackie and her mom learn some surprisingly spooky information about each other. Rachel and her mom actually discuss books. Books mentioned: Little House on the Prairie, Winnie the Pooh, Martha Speaks, Pride & Prejudice, Tom Sawyer, Huckleberry Fin...
May 12, 2022•1 hr 12 min•Season 2Ep. 82
Feliz Cinco de Mayo! This week, we’re talking about one of our favorite nuns, the genius author, poet, and scholar Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz. Born in the mid-1600s, Sor Juana’s work has had a resurgence in the past few decades, and we want to get a little piece of the action for ourselves. (Yes, we know Cinco de Mayo isn’t actually a big deal in Mexico.) Rachel shakes people’s hands just to MESS with them. Jackie reveals one of the rules of being white. Theo recommends time travel. Topics includ...
May 05, 2022•46 min•Season 2Ep. 81
Bump Patrol is back, baby. We revisit the book Theo calls one of the scariest of the whole Goosebump canon, and it’s an absolute blast (from the past). Will the kids stay out of the basement as they’re told? Or will they drive the plot forward by very much NOT staying out of the basement? Is Margaret and Casey’s mom having an affair with a cactus? Is Fatso a good nickname for a preteen girl? What even is DNA anyway? Listen to find out! The first ~15 minutes are free to all. Join our much-loved P...
Apr 28, 2022•15 min•Season 2Ep. 80
Voltaire’s renowned 1759 satire of the idea that everything is for the best! Candide, a young German fellow, goes on a series of increasingly worse (and more bizarre) adventures, and does his best to maintain his sunny disposition. Theo reveals the last thing he wanted to do. Rachel is so powerful, despite having clothes on. Jackie plays an ultrasound prank. Topics include: honchxheads, Dune 1984-style, the idea of human suffering, a bunch of little Stalins running around, nonbinary Leibniz, Wil...
Apr 21, 2022•1 hr 38 min•Season 2Ep. 79
Gather round, audience, and we’ll tell you a tale of Voltaire, perhaps the greatest satirist in all of France. Learn why this man kept getting sent to England (a fate worse than death)! Find out which family member he hooked up with! Discover what his friends did with his body after he died! Rachel apologizes for having taken a philosophy course. Jackie comes for Young Thug. Theo declares his intention to cremate himself out of courteousness. Topics include: the ethics of Havana Moon by Chuck Be...
Apr 14, 2022•59 min•Season 2Ep. 78
We’ve got a very special guest for you this week - Yoon Ha Lee, author of, among others, the Machineries of Empire series, and the Thousand Worlds series (with Rick Riordan Presents). Join us as we compare adult SF/F publishing to middle grade & YA, get our PhDs in space operas, and even discuss the appeal of robots. Theo is more honorable than Jackie. Jackie reveals some truly shocking information. Rachel talks about her worst teacher. Yoon exposes his own shameless pandering. Topics includ...
Apr 07, 2022•1 hr 29 min•Season 2Ep. 76
We wrap up the final 7 stories of James Joyce’s ‘Dubliners’. Somehow, despite the stories only getting sadder, we were more or less beside ourselves with silliness. Sometimes the stars just align that way, and neither soaring prose nor existential dread nor the revelation that one of us had unwittingly done something extremely embarrassing during a previous recording can bring us down. But fear not, for we still manage to get you (and ourselves) suitably learnt. Theo sings a song in Latin. Jacki...
Mar 24, 2022•1 hr 50 min•Season 2Ep. 75
Happy St. Patrick’s Day! In this seasonally appropriate episode, we read the first 8 short stories that comprise James Joyce’s 1914 collection ‘Dubliners’. A portrait of middle-class life in the titular city at the turn of the 20th century, things undeniably get weird, and the gang has to figure out how to talk about it without throwing up from sadness. Tune in to find out if they succeed! Theo is Aladdin in more ways than one. Jackie doesn’t understand how e-books work. Rachel wants her $20 bac...
Mar 17, 2022•1 hr 37 min•Season 2Ep. 74
The return of our wonderful guest, author and historian Ada Palmer! (If you haven’t listened to our first episode with her, scroll back a bit and listen to Romeo & Juliet & Everything else.) This time we talk about the Black Death, Covid-19 as a historian sees it, and helping each other make a better world. Topics include: Titus Andronicus, Romeo & Juliet, Petrarch, tranquil souls, the gayest city in Europe, cuneiform tweet tablets, jelly baby models of the Battle of Helm’s Deep, Pro...
Mar 10, 2022•1 hr 8 min•Season 2Ep. 73
We read the last five chapters of Winnie-the-Pooh, by A.A. Milne. Which character is a badass bitch? Which character is the most like Theo? Which character makes Theo suddenly turn against the book entirely? Find out if this book gets to remain a classic, or if we decide to fire it out of the canon entirely. (Or a secret third option?!) Rachel disrespects the wishes of the dead. Jackie becomes a Luddite. Theo considers the benefits of killing Rachel. Topics include: plane landings, Rowlf the Dog...
Mar 03, 2022•1 hr 34 min•Season 1Ep. 72
We read the first five chapters of Winnie-the-Pooh, by A.A. Milne. As usual, our hosts have varying degrees of familiarity with this childhood classic. Does it hold up? Is it worth having kids just to read to them about Pooh and the gang? Let’s find out together. Theo reminisces about the sweet, delicious Pepsi Era. Jackie is still mad at Capri Sun. Rachel is being very Central American. Topics include: the Taisho Era, birthday errors, PG Wodehouse, AskJeeves, Edward Bear, imaginary friends (Ala...
Feb 24, 2022•1 hr 33 min•Season 2Ep. 71
We have a very special guest for you all today - Professor Ada Palmer, author of the recently-completed Terra Ignota series (one of Rachel’s favorites). We invited her on to talk about Romeo & Juliet, but, as is customary with our guest episodes, the conversation went in some very surprising directions. (However, we do recommend that you listen to our previous Romeo & Juliet episode first for context!) Topics include: Machiavelli, the Black Death, a surprising amount of lice talk, pro-Co...
Feb 17, 2022•1 hr 46 min•Season 2Ep. 70
Ah, love. We love it in all of its forms. One of those forms is the love between Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Robert Browning, both legendary poets, each married to the other. But which is better?! In the gladiatorial arena of romance, two love poems enter, but only one love poem leaves. Rachel stans a cougar. Jackie is a closeted sexist. Theo learns that he’s not a learner. Topics include: Nathaniel Hawthorne, Easy A, Rosemary’s Baby, exclamation points, Ol’ Dirty Bastard, Goosebumps, Percy B...
Feb 14, 2022•41 min•Season 2Ep. 69
Y’all know the drill! Shakespeare’s classic - boy and girl meet, fall in love immediately, and, through a series of misadventures, die. Sure, it’s famous, but does it hold up?! Jackie single-handedly defeats the whole purpose of the podcast. Theo taints the whole thing. Rachel helps high schoolers cheat on a quiz. Topics include: secret societies, chocolate assholes, Ann Hathaway’s performance in Interstellar, the origin of bacon, early aughts fashion, Kony 2012, Jimmy Stewart, biting thumbs, ar...
Feb 10, 2022•1 hr 26 min•Season 2Ep. 68
