Dr. Brad Reedy, Clinical Director and Co-Founder of Evoke Therapy Programs, explains Evoke's wilderness therapy for those who have a family member or friend at Evoke. He talks about how you can support your loved ones as they navigate the difficult path toward healing from mental health and addiction issues.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about how communication skills can be used to gain clarity and transform a relationship from enmeshment and reactivity to clarity and connection. He talks about the fundamental tools of communication and listening and the ideas that they rest on.
Dr. Brad Reedy discusses "The Four Agreements," by Don Miguel Ruiz. He highlights how closely this book aligns with what we know about child development, attachment, and parenting. He talks about guilt and shame. He talks about learning to un-learn many of the things our parents taught us and their parents taught them. Brad recommends this book to parents and children alike as a spiritual guide to our psychological development.
Dr. Reedy talks about how fathers play an important role in the lives of their sons. He talks about being a mentor and learning to listen as keys to raising resilient and resourceful sons.
Dr. Reedy takes questions from siblings, family, and friends of Evoke Therapy Programs participants. He talks about how to support a loved one in treatment. He talks about honoring siblings struggle to reconnect to their sibling in treatment.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about how we communicate with our children reveals qualities of our relationship with them. He provides guidance for writing letters to your child and connecting those to the underlying ideas of intimacy, connection, and differentiation.
Dr. Brad Reedy, Clinical Director of Evoke Therapy Programs, discusses the concept of our inner-child: the lost parts of ourselves, the authentic or real self. He talks about how it is lost through messages of shame and how to regain and integrate those parts of ourselves. Brad talks about doing you own work and shares some stories about his own inner-child work.
Dr. Reedy discusses self-care and creating a life where people respect and honor you and your boundaries.
Dr. Reedy talks about how being right is the opposite of being a Self. He talks about how children and parents can get stuck in the battle over who is right and who is wrong. He talks about how trying to be good and right is the enemy of personal growth.
Dr. Brad Reedy talks about entitlement in children and offers a unique perspective. He explains how terms like "spoiled," "selfish," and even "entitled" are used by adults to shame children so that the adult doesn't have to own and deal with boundary setting. He explains barriers to setting boundaries and encourages parents to do their own work to improve in this area. He also talks about how parents are shamed through labels like "helicopter-parent," "enmeshed," or even "codependent."
Dr. Reedy discusses the dynamics of trust and forgiveness as it relates to parenting a struggling child. He talks about how trust is something we own and decide to give away on our own time schedule. He talks about how healing and forgiving are at the discretion of the hurt part, not the one doing the hurting. He empowers parents to own their feelings a not be responsible for how others interpret them.
Dr. Reedy talks to parents about various types of resistance in therapy and how best to engage their children without making it worse.
Dr. Reedy talks about the 8 Tools he has seen made the biggest impact on the children and families he has worked with for the last 23 years: I statements, listening, clarifying intent, avoiding imperatives and polarizing language, developing a practice of compassion, and taking time-outs. He shares stories and examples of each of the tools as well as how they help foster differentiation in relationships.
Dr. Reedy discusses the shift from the identified patient model to treating the family system. He talks about seeing beneath the symptoms to the underlying wound that is being expressed. He also invites parents of struggling children to model vulnerability and openness in the therapeutic process.
Dr. Reedy answers questions from siblings, friends, and extended family members of Evoke participants about wilderness therapy, siblings, and mental health. Some of the topics included here are how to support a loved-one while in treatment, how to deal with a sibling at home resistant to family therapy, and how to deal with guilt for sending a child to treatment.
Dr. Reedy discusses the hot new book "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck by Mark Monson. He talks about how the book offers an accessible entry to some Buddhist concepts like radical acceptances, the inevitability of suffering, detachment, and the beginners mind. He also talks about some of the book's limitations and short comings, specifically the lack of insight on how to effectively deal with resistance.
Dr. Reedy talks about the challenges that occur when co-parents don't support each other. He discusses strategies and tools for creating cohesion. At the center of the idea is that if one becomes focused on the other parent, it can increase division and polarizations.
Dr. Reedy talks about who can benefit from attending 12-Step support groups. The benefits of attending, sharing, working the steps and having a sponsor are reviewed. Dr. Reedy suggests that the 12-Steps could benefit everyone regardless of their specific circumstances.
Dr. Reedy explains that when the identified patient is removed from the family in treatment the parents often redirect the energy towards the marital relationships. He explores qualities of a healthy marriage beginning with the development of healthy self development in each of the partners. He debunks some common ideas in our culture surrounding love and marriage.
Dr. Reedy talks about risk taking behavior, the adolescent brain, and how development informs us about our children’s risky behavior. He uses it to explain addiction and other seemingly irrational choices.
Dr. Reedy talks about dynamics underlying family conflict. He warns that conflict is not simply a measure of a child's struggle and that it may signal a need for a parental shift. He discusses concepts and tools that help in navigating conflict.
Dr. Reedy discusses the role that insight and experience play in the development of a healthy self in the therapeutic process.
Dr. Reedy reviews Refuge Recovery by Noah Levine. He praises it as a simple and straightforward approach appealing to those who may want a non-theistic approach to recovery. He also talks about how it doesn't tend to provoke defensiveness as some other models, due to it's avoidance of dogmatic principles. He talks about it as both an alternative and a compliment to other approaches to treating addiction. He discusses mindfulness and other Buddhist inspired elements of the approach.
Dr. Reedy discusses adolescent and young adult developmental tasks and the implications for parents helping children negotiate these stages.
Dr. Reedy talks about Delay of Gratification and Low Frustration Tolerance and the developmental science behind it. He talks about how these traits related to other issues. He teaches parents how to support healthy development in these areas. He explains that Wilderness Therapy, specifically nomadic primitive living wilderness therapy, is an effective way at fostering growth in these areas.
Dr. Reedy discusses the work of John Gottman, Ph.d. and his concept of emotional coaching (in contrast to dismissive, dissaproving, or laissez-faire parenting). Gottman explains how learning to hear and validate children leads to resiliency and the reduction of mental health issues. Parents who focus on behaviors rather than emotions, tend to overvalue cooperation. Parents who see a child's "negative" emotions as an opportunity for intimacy are better suited to provide healthy guidance. He expla...
Dr. Reedy discusses the vulnerabilities and underlying issues that may lead to electronic addictions. He discuses and compares substance abuse disorders with process addiction. He talks about parenting a child struggling with self-sabatoging and self-medicating behaviors.
Dr. Reedy discusses some of the concepts underlying wilderness therapy and how those dynamics are intensified in the winter and during the holiday season. He talks about how we support and celebrate holidays and how wilderness in the winter creates mindfulness and a greater appreciation for family.
Dr. Reedy talks about important aspects of parent-child dynamic that help to improve boundaries, self-efficacy, and resiliency. Parental self-care and appropriate praise are also discussed.
Dr. Reedy discusses the need for listening before talking or teaching. He describes how the brain's higher level functioning, when feeling threatened or stressed, is hijacked and the individual is unable to take-in information or reason. He talks about the need for parents and others to listen to children to quiet the flight or fight responses, before launching into lectures or lessons, so that those lessons may sink-in.
