We acknowledged the traditional custodians of the land. We're recording on today. Making my bed in the morning annoying enough, making their bed too. Yeah, but you don't have to.
This is one of those things where people put stupid pressure and expectations on themselves.
Well, you do have to make it a little bit. No, go and have a look at mine. Oh, let me go have a look later.
Hello, and welcome back to Eat, Sleep, Shit, Repeat, a wildly.
Unhinged podcast about the madness that is motherhood and everything in between. Named Kelley McCarran. I'm Kiri cels. I just wanted to start the episode off by thanking everyone for the love feedback. We love that you're picking out what we're putting down. So on the show today, is my toddler ready for a big bed? We asked you. Shit is about your experiences, advice, and any regrets you had around the transition, and the feedback was really eye opening.
We'll get to that a little later, but first it is my turn for peek and Pit. So oh, I just don't even know where it's starting with. Ohls Oh, we're starting with the pit, so we have to start with the pit.
So we end happy. So my main pit really is Lenny's feelings. And you know what, I don't want to talk about that anymore. It's boring to me, and get it. I just think I'd rather tell everyone a real tale
of misfortune. Okay, that sort of like comes off the back of my last pit, which is where I spoke about how bad my hangovers I've got and he was like, that is absolutely not allowed to be your pit, and I was like, well it is because as someone who prides themselves on their ability to party, not being able
to is a pit. Yeah, okay for you, Yes, of course for me, So yes, shall I tell you about a recent hangover that was so bad, so mortifying that it really made me question all of my life decisions basically, Yeah, I am a thirty five year old woman, Yeah, making these sorts of life choice. Had a friend's birthday, went out, had a great time. I don't know what the hell I do. Think it was partially the fault of the champagne. It's always a champagne for a crappy quality champagne. Oh
even worse because I didn't actually drink that much. It was just really poor quality champagne. Had a huge dinner like there was not yeah, the usual factors that could.
Can you stop drinking pretty early on right? Not too late at all?
It was like eleven thirty twelve, yeah, yeah, was home in bed by two, not too late. I love that there are some people listening that are like that is the middle of the night.
I mean yeah.
And I was staying at my girlfriend's house, Thank the Lord, because if I'd been woken up by my toddler that morning.
Whoo or the recommendation for the no, what is I love a sleepover an adult sleepover.
So I woke up in the morning and I was like, oh, this isn't good. And my friend's partner, who's also my friend, he bought me in a coffee and he was.
Just like sort of hovering over me.
He like put the coffee next to the bed, and then he's like, can I go get you a baraka?
Do you want some paodole some paracetamol? And I'm like no, no, I'm whine.
I just need to suffer in silence right here. And then next minute it's like eleven forty five and I'm thinking, oh, my goodness, you've just been rushing in your friend's spare room all morning.
Yuck.
They've got a baby, and Hannah was also in just a world of pain. They didn't care at all. They were like, come downstairs, continue you're rot down here. And I'm like, no, no, I need to go home. Like I live twenty minutes away. Yeah, I need to go home. Yeah, And so I like collect my things and then I walk to the car. The car is maybe two minutes down the road, like it's not a far walk at all. And I get to the car and I'm so dizzy and so unwell that I have to lay in the car.
This is a busy street in Redford. There were people walking by. And then I'm rushing in my car with my legs in the air, with the seat all the way back.
Just like, oh, your legs in the air. With my legs in the air because I was so sick. They're dizzy, yeah.
And then maybe half an hour passes. They're probably at home thinking Okay, I must be home and in bed.
Thank god. No, I'm still out inside with my legs in the air. They turned on find my friends and they're like, she's literally a block away. Water is going on.
They go for a walk to get coffee, a wholesome. A wholesome walk with their baby to go get coffee, and they're like, it's like Curl's legs. Anyway, Eventually I thought, you're fine.
Like I knew I wasn't over because I'd stopped drinking at this point fifteen hours ago or something.
Yeah. Yeah, So it was just that I was so on well, so I thought, no, no, you have to drive home. I'm driving along and I thought, oh no, this isn't good. Oh no, And I'm in a tunnel. There's no way to pull over. There's not even one of those little emergency they need more emergency.
I wouldn't even pull over in them. They're so scary. I've had too many a time.
Really, Yeah, I'm a vomita anyway, and I'm driving along and it happens, and I swerve. It wasn't safe. I'm here to tell the tail so it's okay. But I'm vomiting all over myself, all over the wheel, all over the dashboard, all over my body, all over the floor, everywhere. And then I just have to continue to drive home because what am I going to do?
Pull over on the side of the freeway. Quick question, whose car are you in?
That's another part of the story. So because I was like being single and driving to.
Go party for the night, I was like, I'm taking the Spots Carr, which is Luke's work car. Luke had so proudly cleaned that car to within an inch of its life the weekend prior, because he'd been taking it for a service, and he was like, actually so proud, Come and have a look at how clean my car is. And then even the next day he's, Oh, it's so clean and shiny. You're like, yeah, So I'm in Luke's car.
Vomiting all over myself. If it had been in my car Lens had avomit in it before.
Yeah, it's already got a bit of a stench to it. Does Lukeska have leather seats? It's not fabric, but it's not leather in between you, I guess I do it. Sorry things back the cleaning sake. Yeah.
So I pull in at home and I just am in a world of pain, just feeling so ashamed. A thirty five year old vomiting because she's so unwell from her own decisions, poor decisions the.
Night before, vomiting while driving. Did you see my meme that I posted.
Didn't give anyone on Instagram details, but I posted a meme where it was like the saw doll riding home with runners going past, and it's like me or my after making questionable life decisions.
The night before, du.
Luke and Lenn were napping, which I knew, so I thought, I reckon, maybe I can get away with this. I sneak inside and I didn't want to go into the bedroom, so I just found like Luke's old jym clothes, like dirty gym clothes. Because I had to take my clothes were covered with vomit. Had to take them off, put them in the sink, put the gym clothes on, get their cleaning stuff, go back outside. Cleaned it to within an inch.
Of its life. Every single chump, cranny, chunk, yuck, yuck cranny. Look everything I'd had, not Joe's the night before. Yeah, I don't want to know those details. I can imagine without prompts.
I don't know why my body hadn't digested. It had been a long time, so that happened. I finally get it all clean, put everything in the bin.
It's spick and span.
Wash the vomit off my shoes with the hose like it's just done. And then I'm sort of like trudging back towards the front door. So Luke's a big person, so wearing his like oversized stinky old gym clothes, trudging back to the house holding my cleaning equipment, and he's just standing at the front door, I can imagine, with his arms crossed over his chest watching me.
He says, were you sick in my car? Indeed, I was so everywhere. Oh, it was everywhere. It stinks far out and he goes, that's my bedroom, that's my second bedroom because he sleeps in there in the morning.
So anyway, moral of the story is question your life, choices.
Question the question. My mouth urts from like laughing, like my jaw.
Well, thank god Luke took lend to his brother's house that afternoon so I could continue my rot on the lounge just watching Bridgeton. And then at one point I was too sick to even lie there and watch Bridgeton, so I had to just staring at the ceiling bleak. When you're two sick, to like watch something, you have to lay there and stare thoughts, and you're just like and you're really questioning your life.
Yeah, yeah. Anyway, so bleak. Did he forgive you about the car? Oh?
Yeah, Oh he's very forgiving. He doesn't give a shit.
Yeah, that's so true. Also, I did do a really good job, Cleanny. He said it didn't smell at all. Peak. Let's move on to peaks. So small one is that my mom and dad got a puppy. Stop. I was asking you about this not long ago, and you were like, not too sure whether they were going to do it or not.
They finally bit the bullet got a puppy. Mazie is a cream colored Border Collie.
Stop. Oh my god, she's so cute. We are yet to meet her.
Apparently she's very nippy and absolute lunatic.
But it's so funny hearing Dad.
He'll be like, oh, this dog's on meth, like it's going crazy, and I'm like, she's a puppy.
I think she's forgotten that puppies are lunatics. They are crazy, like you do forget because yeah, I don't know. Most people have really well behaved dogs, right, because you can't have an unruly dog, so you just completely forget about puppy. Puppy.
You need to teach them it's teeth. Yeah, you have to teach them how to be a well behaved human. Oh my god, Lena is gonna he is going to He just loves looking.
At the photos so far, so I really want to go up soon. But the main peak is we have.
Found a good marriage counselor I'm really thrilled.
How ha ha Okay, so Key has known the whole drama over the marriage counsel that really didn't like me that much, that blamed everything on me. He was a nightmare. He canceled all of our session, like super religious, which is fine, but if you're not religious, I'm not religious.
He was taught to me about horsemen all the time, and I'm like, bro, I'm just like, what does the horseman have to do with it?
Honestly, he was just not it.
And then I thought that he'd just given up on us because he canceled our sessions.
And I was like, well, our marriage counsel has gotten rid of this because he's no hope, no hope.
And I expressed my disappointment when they set us up with this new bloke.
I love him. Oh that's so good.
We got more out of one session with him than we had for six months with Gustaff.
Oh yes, Gustuff, do you reckon? It was long service live.
Definitely something has gone down with good stuff. So Scott the new bloke is fantastic. Both of us agreed that we got so much out of it, and because I complained so vigorously, they've given us six sessions for free.
If that doesn't say scandal, I don't know what. But also if that doesn't say pick girl. And he actually seems to like me and he keeps like so freaking short, so anyway that we're not paying people to be mean and just actively dislike us and tell me to stop being a horseman. All right, let's move on to our deep dive. It's our meaty topic of the day. When to leave the safety of a cot aka bby jail for the independence of a bed aka our worst nightmare?
Were so not in ingredients on this. So the topic came up when one of my mother's group friends called Maria, had said she had moved her son to a bed and was looking for advice, and our jaw was on the floor because we were like, why did you do that? And she was like, we were overseas and you know when you're on holiday it's so much easier to pull them into bed with you, and that he just created
a habit. And then when he got home he basically refused to cot, so it was a bed And I was like, Okay, totally get it, but I have no adverse for you, because that sounds hectic? Is that?
Yeah?
I want to do it going right? I mean no, not necessarily. Well, you'll be surprised because I thought that too. And the more I thought about it, the more confused I was as to why they don't just keep making cots that are bigger size so we can keep them sixteen years old.
That's one way to keep them at home at night lit sneaking out literally what's them in for the evening?
So I think that's a crime crime turn it really has. So if you couldn't already guess what our current thoughts are on doing this. We're a little bit hesitant, but I thought you might jump into even All right, Well tell me about you, cal what are your thoughts on it? Like, obviously it needs to be done at some point, but you're pretty not even going to open that can of worms. I think that it is so dependent. I mean, we'll get more into this when we hear from the shitters and talk about.
Different people's experiences. It's so dependent on the kid. If Lenny was flipping himself out of the cot, which would be alarming because it's dangerous, then I would consider Yeah. If getting him to sleep in a cot was an absolute punish, then I would consider it. Like, there are so many things that we're just not there, so I just don't care. And there's no baby on the way, like I think for a lot of people they've said that we wanted to move the toddler into the cop
before the baby came or whatnot. He's not there and there's no problem with it.
He quite likes it.
He goes in there to play sometimes when I'm in the room, and then the game involves me throwing.
Could mister elephant come in? Yes, and he goes in. And then he likes to play in the cot with all of his toys. But he's not scared of the cot.
He doesn't scream. He we do our nighttime routine, which involves he has a milk when we read some stories, and then happily he'll get his sack down. He gets into his sack and then and he will point to bed and say bed he wants to go into the cot, But then I mean, I'm making it sound like an absolute dream. It's because then I lie next to him when we sing the Stinky song about twenty different times,
about twenty different people. Yes, And I will lie there with him on the floor until he goes to sleep, And it's not like when he wakes up in there, he's like get it out.
Yeah.
Sometimes when I go in there in the morning, then he lies back down plays with his dummies, and the cot isn't a bad place to him.
No, if it was, then you'll be looking at doing it. I think that's what it is. And that's what most people said that it was very much their decision was informed by whatever situation that they were in and the type of personality that they had. For me, I am obviously the last of my girlfriends to have a kid, So I start to see one by one they're like moving the baby to the bed, and I'm like, oh god,
this sounds like it's really scary. And then we go through really bad patches with Rue's sleep sometimes like she's super clean at the moment, so bedtime's are nightmare. And you hear stories of how when people move their kids from the cock to the bed that sometimes it fixes their sleep. And I'm like, oh, that does sound quite interesting.
But a lot of people say all the experts say, and we didn't want to get an expert on to talk about this because I think that like just hearing from shit is and how vary the experience is actually not like an actual expert led matter. It's not just trust your gut. And that's what it showed because experts say that cognitively just emotionally three plus is kind of the age that you should do it. But from all of the shit is, it showed that there was success
over all different ranges. The younger ones did have a little bit less success. But let's go through all of it now, because I think it's actually really interesting. Well what are your thoughts are though that you not ready yet? Not ready yet? But I'm also like, the thing with Rue is some things with her have been easy ish, like she's just party training, like potty training, and I'm like, well, if the bed's easy, I would kind of like the
bed because I struggle lifting her up into the cot. Yeah, and it's also quite annoying to settle her, like so if you could just jump into bed with her, if I could jump into bed with her, it'd be great. But then I've also got to be ready for the fact that she's going to be getting up potentially and then.
Just coming into bed with you, going and helping herself to snacks exactly.
But I guess, But I wonder, like would this be okay? And is this the right time, because I say, like, if your kids showing signs, I don't think there are signs per se with this. I think it can be led by the kid from what I'm reading from the shit is. But I'm thinking, if there's a sweet spot to do it, do I just take the opportunity and give it a crack or do I leave it until the last minute? And then is it going to be even harder because she's going to be really attached to
the cot and not want to make the move. Because that can happen as well. Yeah yeah, yeah, they can.
Like not want to get a big girl, big boy bed.
Well what happens is it's the safety of the cot being a smaller space going into a big bed. It's like too much space?
What do you have? Because I think that can help.
So I have one that can be converted into a toddler bed. The should as have said some of them are like, it's better going straight to a big bed, otherwise you've got to do the transition again.
Yeah, which I just think that like with my sister, she with EV, they've struggled a lot. What they do though, is that they'll just pull the side off and on. Like it's really easy to put off and on. So if she's been too difficult and just constantly getting up through the night and coming into their bed, they'll put it back on and be like, no, you've lost your privileges.
You're back in jail.
Because she'll be like, I'm just gonna tiptog back in to see you guys, and they're like, well, okay, back into baby Joe, you go.
That's actually a really good point though, like if it's easy enough to get on and off, you could just give it a red hot crack.
A red hot crack and give them that independence and I guess grown upness of having the side off and then well, if you're not going to follow the rules, which is that you stay in bed unless something's wrong or whatnot.
Yeah, then you will get it put back on. I actually, I don't know.
I guess it depends how people feel about punishments or riberry that sort of thing, because that's what Lenny's bed is too. It's one of the ones that goes into a todd the bed and then ends up being an actual bed.
Yeah, so it was a lot.
More expensive than some of them that were on the market, but I wanted him to have that option. However, he's so tall that I don't actually think we'll ever get to a stage where it could be used as a bed because it's still a smaller bed.
Let's just jump into these response cases. I think we're talking about a lot of the stuff that we're going to be talking about again. Even with such varied ages and experiences, overwhelmingly should have said that they did not regret making the move, which yeah, I thought was it's not really something you can regret. Well, no, because it's
coming in every single night. Even the people that said they probably went a little bit too early were like, no, it's actually good now in the long run, it's been great. So the average age was two and a half to three years, but we also had people as young as twelve months, and the old was for there were also a couple of moms who I wanted to shout out, who were like, they're still for we're not moving them. The reasons we kind of touched on some of them
another baby on the way to the cotch. They also wanted to do before the other baby arrived, so it wasn't lots of change all at once. Experts say to do it three months before or after any other big change, so a lot of people try and get that out of the way. Also, if you're doing potty training, that's another thing to consider. Not to do all of that
at once. You kind of want to break it up too long or outgrew the cot which I was like, lend reason, well, for his third birthday, you might want to consider it to he might have to pull him out. They started climbing out, which is obviously a huge safety thing. They just didn't like the cot Some kids just didn't like them, so I think the younger ones that was a lot of the reasoning for moving them so young. The parents were tired of laying on the floor to resettle.
Families that co slept interestingly went straight to a normal bed, which makes sense, but the transition seemed to be better for a floor bed, so smart.
Or they'll put the playpen then with just the mattress on the floor of the playpen so the kid can't get out still and hurt themselves.
So smart. It's like a floor cot. Yeah, but it doesn't Yeah, yeah, yeah, I like that a lot. The parent can still get in it with them because it's a big space. Yeah. And I think the one that everyone's probably hoping happens, the kid was requesting a big bed.
Also with the kids flipping themselves out a lot of the time, that must be because they don't have their sacks on anymore, because apparently kids can start getting crossed and don't want to go into a sack.
Oh yeah, ye yeah. A lot of the mums in here were like we had to because they refused a sack and were climbing out. And then one of the mums actually did give us a tip and said, if they're refusing the sack, turn it around backwards so that they can't get it off. Oh yeah, And then they said, we then loves getting any sack. He's such but I haven't made it a big thing.
Then we're going into the sack now and it's like it's cozy.
I mean I would. I'm not gonna lie. Oh, I'd love to sleep in a big seit. It's like those big snuggle coat things. Anyway, this one I thought was really good, and I actually did think of you, because whenever you say like that, you lay there and have to pat him and stuff. So they said we were literally spending hours on the floor of her room patting her through the cot. I was well over it. We had tried to sleep train like three times and it
worked for short periods but always reverted back. We moved into a double bed with a rail up and I lay next to her to go to sleep. Then can lay with her when she wakes during the night, and it's so much better. That was like music to my ears because although I'm not having to get up as much like obviously we have bouts of it. I would like to just stay in there and sleep the rest of the night, because I've got no problem with sleeping with you exactly. I sleep as well, but I think
you would. The older they get, I think it's the yeah, Sarah gets to sleep with them. We have our little play couch thing in rose room and like six foot four, Charlie is like, bring me a blanket and a pillow, and I'm like, good luck, and I've slept on that thing before. It is cold.
Yeah, he's so much like me, though you've said that. He also will put his headphones on, play on his phone there. I have a glass of red under the.
Cod reach in which is spilt the other night and I was like, I told you, Brady read wine egg can all be cleaned? You don't have white carpets. You're not silly, It's so true. Okay, So transition, the timing was super varied. Like potty training, it really depended on the type of kid you had, their personality, and I think also just like how able you were to hold your ground at two or three am in the morning, that really came into play. What do they mean hold
your ground? Well, you know when they get up and they're like mom, momum, so we just pullinian. Well no, they're like you have to put them back into their bed because their bed is their space. Like they're gonna keep getting up because now they're like, oh, I can get one. I can do that. So that was the main thing. It was like, well, we had to be really defined in those moments. And when you're half asleep. You just like the willpower. It's a new form of
sleep training. I guess it is, yes, but some people take to it pretty quickly and some continue to wait. But all of the parents preferred resettling in a bed versus a cot.
I think just I think everyone would write it's way more comfortable.
Definitely. There was lots of success with setting up the bed and letting them initiate the move.
So fun if you do it for their birthday. M's doing it for Evye's birthday this year.
She's four. Yeah, she's so.
Excited to like make Evy's room really cute and like big girl bed.
And that's what a lot of the parents said. It was like we didn't want to push it on them, so it was like a lot of talking about it. Yeah, a lot of parents took them to choose, Oh God, chose the bed. Money woud choose a bloody car? Well. I was like, I wouldn't let them choose the bed, but then a lot of parents would like choose the linen. Even then I don't mind that. I'm like, get into that because you.
Don't have a small boy that loves cars.
I have one that loves whales and snails. Oh that's cuteles. That's I don't know why it's cute, but me, I'm buying, like Paisley, Yeah exactly, I'm like taking them talking about it and the lead up to it a little. It's all over the can you imagine I'll be like, get for really aggressive sheets, but they look like flies, So I had I just let that be a daycare. Thanks every time I put her in there, like that looks so rank.
I don't want to sleep with bugs. No, exactly, just send sheets to daycare.
Yeah, your daycare is so straight, we know, Okay, setting it up like obviously if you've got the space being able to set it up, or if you're moving them to their big girl room or big boy room out of the nursery setting it up and jumping at some people's houses, well, sorry I keep interrupting it, but I'm just like that. I've got a lot of thought. Some people don't live rich in Sydney and they're rich, or they do and they just live in normal.
Oh this is his nursery and then this is his bedroom.
Well, the nursery can sometimes be like the little office that they've set up as a nursery, right, so they talk the second office. You've got a little office. We're in it right now. Oh, you're gonna put a kid in the garage? I met cold. I mean them as much in European countries they like leave them out in the pram and the cold. It helps with the it's a thing. I need to show it to you, because
I reckon I'll blow your mind. But yeah, letting them kind of just see it there and then slowly show interest and then they seem to be a bit more comfortable with it. And I think a lot of the parents said that. There's also a bit of transitioning from the room, like even the room to the bed. So having the separate spaces, if you have the room set up, is nice for them to kind of go between. And often they'll be like, I want to sleep in the big bed, and then that's kind of it. It's okay.
Led by them. One of the really good tips on here was that they got a single bed with a trundle for two reasons, so clever. A lot of the concern over kids obviously moving to a bed is that they roll out of bed and you can get those side things. It's not that high. It's not that high normal, but still I think it can be dangerous. So and
it can also just wake them up and wake everyone up. Yeah, true, right, and if you do going really well in the bed, then they might get a little bit scared from the bed, so we want to try and avoid it, saying so yeah, they said the trundle was really good in that respect, and also so if you have to go and resettle them, you just pull out the trundle to lay on. So I was like, all right, we're getting a trundle. Also goodmazing. Yes, they are also good. Uncle Sam sleep on the trot.
He's a real hoot in the morning. He's a real hoot. So I asked about experts and advice, and most people did it without any help, which was reassuring. I think they asked friends, they asked Google. With us Mother's group. There were a couple of Instagram pages so family centered Sleep and Baby Sleep Consultant, and a few people did follow the Montessori philosophy for holistic sleep, which is like putting the bed on the floor and having like toys
out to encourage them. If they get up, that's fine, if they wake up, but that they go and get their toys and they play and then they kind of go back to sleep. So instead of like waking up mom and dad. Is my idea of it. Anyway that sounds like heaven. Yeah, well must be nice. It must be nice.
My girlfriend she's got like freak children unicorns.
If they wake up before seven am, or even maybe at seven am, if she's not ready to get up, she can hear them and she'll just jump on their individual monitors and tell them to play quietly in their room until she comes and gets them. And they do. Wait, they don't even play together. They just they've all got their own room. Rich people.
They just sit in their rooms and play and until mum comes and gets them.
A lot of people said that they use the grow clock. I don't know if you've heard about this. I've heard about this. So it's a clock that lights up and has different symbols to basically signify nighttime and then daytime as to when they're allowed to get out of bed. So if you say you can't get out of your bed until that goes to orange and there's a sun, they're going to be just looking at that clock being like, can't get out of bed. Sometimes they hop out of bed,
so that's like a good thing. My niece Margo uses that and then Gem's like, I need to just put it forward an hour so she sleeps in.
Yeah, just make her stay in there for walker.
But a lot of people say that that was really helpful. I asked it as would they recommend doing it, and they all said yes, it creates more of a sleep association and their own sleep space, and they felt that their kids felt less trapped in a bed versus cot, and that they were much calmer around bedtime, so it was a bit more enjoyable.
Like that would be awful if your kids kicking off about having you to bed every night, Like oh.
I know, And I didn't even think about that, Like I guess it's just not in the realm of thought of moving them that early. I remember being like so overwhelmed with the thought of moving them from the bassinette to the cot, like, oh, this is going to fuck up the sleep so bad, but not thinking that if you didn't have a great sleeper, the benefits of it, because it's like how you have your weird quirks around
like noise or whatever. It's a what do you mean my weird quirks around noise, Like when I come over and I haven't seen you in a week, I'm so excited to see you, and you're like, I'm just gonna work with my headphones. Okay, I did that once because you were editing something and I couldn't concentrate while you were editing something without headphones. Yeah I know, But like that's what I mean is that everyone's got there. It doesn't matter what age you are. You like your half around sounds.
Yeah, I'll be like, do you mind just turning your notifications off because she'll be sitting there and it'll be.
Like ing ing ing. She goes, Oh, is it loud? Yes, But it's the same thing, right, It's like a sensory thing. I think it's the same with kids. So it's just a great option. I feel like if you're struggling with sleep like that. When I was reading this, I was like, anyone who struggled with sleep, I just want them to read this and maybe this could be a good solution.
Listen to them podcast exactly exactly. But then there were some people who did it and hated it, which I think we should touch on because.
The few people that I've talked to about this, or have just told me their experiences. Their kid ends up in their room every night, yeah, waking them up as well.
As one person said, why did you start? We're on holiday and my husband thought it'd be a great idea to let them sleep in a bed. Yeah, great work on that one. Oh, and she's like, I definitely wouldn't have started. So I don't think that it's going to work for everyone. It's not necessarily going to be an easy thing. But I guess it's just how much you want it and how much the kid responds to it. But the best advice that I read was if it's not working, go back to the cot exactly.
It's not like a once you do something. It's kind of like once you start potty training. It's not like you have to never put them in a nappy again.
Well I think it's a bit easier with that because you're like, I'm putting them back in a nappy because there's piss and shit everywhere. But with sleeping, I feel like sometimes as a parent, you put these crazy expectations on what you're doing, and you try to make them behave in a certain way or act in a certain way. And you don't give yourself as much leniency. Like if you're not putting a nappy on them and they're refusing to potty train, of course you're going to put a
nappy on them because that's gross. But I think with something like sleep, you try to persevere. But also sleep deprivation at any age or stage is so shit. So just remember that you have the opportunity to revert back. They're not ready. They're not ready. You know something that I didn't. They were like, I wouldn't do it again. Beds get jumped on and need making every day delay as long as possible. I did not think about that, Like making my bed in the morning annoying enough, making
their bed too. Yeah, but you don't have to.
This is one of those things where people put stupid pressure and expectations on themselves.
Well, you do have to make it a little bit. No, go and have a look at mine. Oh you don't make your bed every day? You're saying, that's okay. I do sometimes, but every time I've come over your bed's mate.
Okay, So I probably do most of the time, but I don't if I don't want to, And this morning I didn't want.
To oh, let me go have a look later.
It's horrid, but I don't care. I like that is a good point though for people.
For people that are clean, someone said hate sometimes they don't actually realize they can get out of the bed themselves. So don't tell them that they can, because I think you go into it being like, now, don't you get out of that bed? But if you just don't mention it, because there were a lot of people whose kids got it straight away, who just didn't get.
Out of bed because you never said anything exactized. Because we've got to remember that they are so simple minded. I say that with love like that might not even cross their thoughts exactly.
So you don't want to plant that seed. It's like, yeah, this is your bed, this is where you stay this week. You stay till we come and get you. Yeah, the floor is lava. Well, you don't want to touch the floor. Floor's got bugs on it. And then I wanted to end on. They will trash the room and explore and that is normal and fine and I love. The other suggestion was is like set their room up for that, so safe play without you. There a lot of people
said put a baby gate on the door. Because if you don't want to sleep with the door shut, like roose doors always open. What and my door's open through the night? Yeah? Doesn't she wake up as soon as there's a moment of light in the morning or if you get up to the toilet. No, I've got blackout. It looks so povo. I just couldn't call it. It looks like, you know, dive past the house and you're like, I
think that chrome is committed. No, I think they're cooking metal have a bad sleeper, Like, what even is it? It's like our foil.
Okay, it's not actually ol foid though, but it's silver sticky stuff that I have got like laminate.
Yeah, it's like book covering basically. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, the ego baby sells it. I got some too. It's no, I got my shit from buddings. It is heavy duty. I need to put a photot because we will die. That is like on the outside of my house to stop a shmidge of light getting into that child's room.
That's the thing. All kids are different, right, And that's I think because otherwise, Op, the birds are awake, I'm awake. What I took away from this and one of the ladies and it had like three kids, and she was like, my one piece of advice would be that for the first kid, I stress so much about all of the transitions bassinett to cot to bed. For the second one, I can't even remember when I put them in a bed, and the third one we're coasally being and choose two and a half.
Yes, So it's something that you probably don't need to stress about the way that you are.
Yeah, exactly. I think it's just like take it in your stride, let them lead it, buy a bed or take the wall off. Like I love that suggestion of what your sister does, and I think that's maybe something dry. But what I loved about those shit is is that, similar to the potty training episode, we know what we're doing, we know our kids. If we start it and it's shit, just stop, go back to the cot. But just ease into it and don't let it be too overwhelming and
too scary. Of course, it's going to be stressful, because everything to do with parenting is, but especially sleep sleep so true, sleepy stressful. So I think it's a real consideration for parents. But you can always go back to what was working before them back in baby jail. Read the tips.
Okay, so these are collated from the shitters. You do not need a fancy bed. You don't need a car bed. I love that you get a second hand one of gum Tree maybe splosh.
I feel like it's a skin. It's the skin, the skin thing. What did I say earlier? Skin blankets, the shedding of the skin, skin bits on blankets you can't wash and you're just kind of like.
Yeah, slowly introduced, so it's not a shocked the system. So maybe don't do what I did with moving Lenny from the snow to the cot.
Oh you just did that. Cold Tricky literally.
Went from our room in the snow to his own room in a cot with the sleep trainer.
Sorry, sorry about that.
Put a gate on the door, as you said, and just do it. Give it a go, especially if the cot isn't working for you. And as Key has already pointed out, stick to the boundaries you set even at three am in the morning.
So you probably need to do it when things aren't.
Too stressful for you at work or in other things that you're going through in life at the time.
Yeah, anything that we ever talk about with kids that are like you both have to be ready. It's been a good time for both of you. Exactly. Just wanted to say thanks to the shitters for all of those lovely responses.
They're so helpful. I find it so much.
They're so funny.
That's why we love everyone so much, because it's like such a fun mum's group.
Yeah. Yeah, it's just fun and loosen and like, why I talk to an expert when we've got like you know, sometimes we need well sometimes we you need to. But when we've got this wealth of knowledge.
From other mums exactly, other parents, we should say, all.
Right, keep moving on to your recommendation for the week. I'm going to be a little bit cheeky here. What is it. I'm going to recommend the other podcasts that I co host.
I feel like, if you don't want to recommend your own podcast, well then that's not very good.
She's not doing very You really believe in your own content? I don't, exactly, so tell us why. So it's called I'm wigging Out. I co host it with Lucy Neville, Friend of the Pop. Yes, we love Luce. Hey, I'm wigging out. I'm wigging out. I am wigging out right now. Help me. I am fully wigging out, and it is about wig outs that was kind of born from our late night FaceTime calls where we were both wigging out about everything and anything in between.
It's honestly like a warm hug listening to us.
It's Monday, it's just half an hour is long. And we start with one of us having sharing a wig out that we had during that week. And there's kind of different levels of wig outs, so your stock standard, your middle, and then you're full blown tornado, which is rocking your socks off. We haven't had one of those yet. And then we move on to a listener dilemma. So we talk through a submission that's coming from one of the Wiga Tonys.
And they are so beautifully kind and empathetic and sensitive. Yeah, it's just a really nice funny He's telling me about the topics and I always give my two cents even though no one asked, and I'm like, Kelly, she's like, this is why you could never do a show like this something.
It'll be like blah blah blah blah blah. Just get over it, and I'm like, that's not what we said. We actually gave some really good advice and then I'll listen to it and I'm like, oh, that's so sweet and lovely, but still needs to get over Anyway, It's really been a joy to put together. It's nice just to put more good things into the world. Yeah, so
it's called I'm winging Out. You can get it on Moodify, Apple and give us a little follow on instats and get it, get it in your ears, get it downloaded, get it in your ears. Thank you so much for getting this injuries today. Please share the pot on your socials and rate and review us. We love to hear from you.
You can tag us at Key Reese, at Kelly Underscore mccaren, and at essr dot pod.
Dot pod Shitters. This episode of Eat, Sleep, Ship Repeat was produced by myself, Key Resells, and Kelly mccaren, with audio production by the gorgeous j MG Madeline Joanna Buy Shitters, Bye,