Drunk Parenting Advice With Kel

with Kel. I've got a large glass of presex. I don't have to go in for a while. Can hear that? Hear it twinkling around? And I screenshotted a bunch of the anonymous questions people want, I guess, unhinged advice to all their dilemmas, which you know, to be fair. When I say like drunk parenting advice or drunk advice, it's more just like, I'm not going to try to be really all darling. It's more brutal, big sister, drunk aunt vibes advice. I like to say, let's get straight into

the questions. I just screenshotted a bunch of them and I'm gonna just answer them until I'm like, whoa, this has been going for far too long, or I'm so hissed that i can't go out for dinner because We've got to go out for dinner after this. So she who bottoms up? My sister's best friend told me everything my sister says about me to her, and it's not nice. Do I confront my sister? If so? How I have been stewing on this for months? Oh my goodness and normous.

That sucks so bad. But the person in the wrong in this situation is actually your sister's best friend. Your sister's best friend sucks, Like, how very dare she tell you information that your sister aka her best friend has told her in confidence. I'm sorry, but unless it was a crime or something that literally cannot be forgiven, which I highly doubt it was, I think she's just said something obviously like quite hurtful, which is awful, But she

should never have regaled that information to you. I think that it just says a lot about your sister's best friend. Unfortunately, you are the one that is winning because your best friend isn't such a dud. I would never tell like a friend's sister things that my friend had said to me when they were just having a little vent or whatnot.

And as if my sister has not called me some awful things to some of her friends when she hasn't been a vent like I think that you totally should have a conversation with your sister, But I don't think you should go in all guns blazing about what she said. I think you should just say, hey, just so you know, this is what so and so, let's just call her Sandra has said to me that you said to her, and what the fuck? Like ouch? But also she needs to know that her best friend's a piece of shit

like that is just so awful. And I feel kind of bad for your sister in this situation because she's got a real shitty best friend. Maybe you could, even, I don't know, if you're close to both of them, have a chat with both of them and really hash it out. But I bet at the end of the day,

your sister doesn't actually think any of those things. I'd say, she was just pissed off at you about something, And like anyone that is a regular human being with siblings, sometimes we say things that we absolutely do not mean but we just say it out of anger, and we trust that the person we're venting to isn't going to repeat that. I think that you just need to chat

to her about it. Also obviously depends on your relationship with your sister, because I guess maybe you guys aren't that close, but I feel like sisters should be able to chat about anything. So next time you're hanging out, don't make a huge deal out of it, but definitely bring it up and just tell her that you've been stewing on it for a few months. Just be really honest,

because she wouldn't want you to have hurt feelings. She wouldn't want you to be stewing on this unless she's also a piece of shit, and then the two of them can just rod in hell. Okay, Okay, Next, is it worth buying new clothes to fit the boobs? Or do I just wait till I stop breastfeeding to look cute again? Okay, Well, I'm going to hold you right there. Why you're not cute just because you've got milk ut of titties. Okay, milk cut of titties are hot, they're

so full. Definitely buy a couple of dresses. Don't spend heaps of money, but just buy a couple of dresses for your new titties that make you feel hot, because I promise you are hot just because you're breastfeeding. You know what, even when your milk comes out and accidentally gets all over the dress, still hot. Who cares, It's just milk. I think that a full tit full of milk, milk of the breast can look quite nice. It's kind of like nature's breast job, nature's breast augmentation. If you will,

oh my god, this question. How do you keep your car clean when you have a kid? I swear I'm a tidy person, but the car just never cops a clean. If someone has a clean car and children, I feel like I'd get into their car and immediately think they are actually just dexter and chopping up bodies for fun on the weekend, because they must be a sociopath. If there is not a little bit of an odor of old vomit, despite cleaning the vomit up, it's still just odorous,

whether yours or the children. Crumbs everywhere because they snack and they are disgusting, and they just crumbs end up everywhere. A couple of crackers under the seat. Just cars. If you've got a car loving child, If you don't have things everywhere, no matter how much you do feel like you're a tidy person, like I said, I think that you're probably dexter. Also, I live in my car. My

car is actually awful. I did clean it last weekend to be fair, but it still has got crumbs everywhere because they get in there, like it needs a professional clean to get that shit out. It's kind of disgusting and there still is that odor of vomit. I think that's my fault, though not Lenny's. No one has a clean car, and if they do, they deck ster. They're chopping up people for fun. Thoughts on baby sprinkles, I

can't stand when people do a sprinkle. I'm all for baby showers for the first baby because it's meant to set you up as parents. But I think a sprinkle is becoming selfish. Will don't go simple as that don't go? Yes, it is self indulgent. Who cares If they want to do it and they have people that want to go and are going to go, then go for gold. And they might not be wanting anything as well, Like yes, if they've got a register for the second baby. That is,

it's not selfish, but it's a little bit greedy. But maybe they're struggling, although in that case they probably wouldn't be having the sprinkle in which you put food on and whatnot. Maybe they are being a little bit greedy, but who cares. Just don't go make up an excuse like we all do when we don't want to go to something and let other people who want to go or to pussy to make up an excuse, go and

sprinkle the person. It doesn't actually have anything to do with you, So it doesn't matter if they want to have a couple of different hens parties, if they want to have sprinkle after sprinkle after sprinkle and have seven kids. Who cares? It actually isn't about you. Just have an excuse. Don't go got any tips for finding a good balance for work slash life Slash admin feels like everything is happening at once and I'm hardly surviving. I'm certainly not thriving.

I had to know life admins a third thing, because honestly, that's a whole job in itself. I don't think that there is such thing as a really good balance well, I do, but I think it takes a lot of work and a lot of organization, which doesn't come naturally to a lot of us to have a really good balance. I would make sure that you and your partner are split. If you have a partner, if you're not sending godspeed, there's really no hope for a while. You know, you

really have to lean on the village. I think that making sure that your partner is taking his share or her share of the brunt of the admin and work and all of that sort of thing, like, don't turn your into a martyr, ask for help. I feel constantly overwhelmed. I feel constantly like I'm surviving and not thriving. I think it's so normal. I think that there will be stages laiter down the track when we feel like we're thriving,

but that just isn't our time at the moment. And I also, a friend gave me some really good advice a couple of years ago because it was during COVID, and I was like, oh God, after a couple of years of really thriving, like the last few years of my twenties and very early thirties, I thrived like I kicked so many goals personally and professionally. So those years I was thriving and then I said, oh, this year, I've literally just survived. And she was like, you know that,

that's okay, And I think that's really great advice. It's okay to survive. You're still doing a great job. And just remember that everything that other people appear to be doing on social media, it's all bullshit, half of its bloody lies, or it's just inflated to look better than what it actually is. Like we don't post the really rough day or the really rough moments. We'll post even if we're prolifically online, it's still a couple of minutes

from a day. And even if you post the bad stuff as well, that's still like two minutes out of an entire day. You haven't seen the fights with different people. You haven't seen the heartache from something that happened at work. You haven't seen the awful meltdown that your child had because you wouldn't let them have their third box of Sultana's, And yes, that actually did just happen in my house. It's just not realistic to think that you will be

on top of everything and really thriving. I think that it's better to just look at like, maybe one week out of every couple of months you really thrive, and that's the week where you nail something professionally. You've got a really nice girl's dinner locked in, and you finally went to the dentist after building it up to be

this huge job and I hate stupid life. I'd mean, I don't have time to do anything, and then you go to the dentist and it's actually not a huge deal and you're like, oh, okay, didn't even have any cavities and health Healthing Insurance gave me back ninety dollars. Great happy days. I think that then you will feel

for that one week that we're thriving. But the expectation when you've got small kids that you are going to be anything but surviving, and that's okay as long as we're still trying to enjoy part of those moments of surviving.

Let's normalize surviving over thriving, especially when we have young families and we're so busy with kids, because I just think it's unrealistic to expect to be on top of anything unless you're like a super organized person and in which case sligh, but it's just not realistic for all of us. And I promise you most people aren't absolute hot mess. There might just be really good at hiding it. How would you enjoy sex with your husband when you

have a two year old? Well, this person needs to listen to last week's episode because I have a three year old. At turns out I've never really enjoyed sex that much unless I'm tippling it up under the tiple. Maybe he'll be in luck tonight. Like I just said in the previous question, I think we need to acknowledge that sometimes it's a season, and maybe this is the season where you're not having enjoyable hot sex on the rag. Like just you've got little kids, two year olds, they

can be in our beds a lot. We're very tired. They're in that awful stage where they don't need naps. They do need naps, like, they just don't seem to sleep as much as the sleep experts say that they're going to. And you also can't force a human to

go to sleep. I think that listen to some of the tips that Tara gave me last week and maybe try to implement them if you can relate to that chat because I think that they were fantastic and really tangible and something that we can all sort of try to do, and if it wasn't going to ruin the whole safety thing, I almost want to film myself doing the centual wave to massive attack while they robed my body, because oh my goodness, what a sight that would be.

My baby is almost one and starting to get clingy. How do I make him be less clingy? To me, you can't. I just don't really have advice for this because I literally have the world's clingiest child, or he's not. I'm sure that there's someone cleaner. But like daycare drop off is still a bit of a punish and tease

three and been going for two years. Hopefully daycare is on the horizon or some sort of care so you can get that little bit of a break and they can get used to having someone else look after them. Try to get your partner to step up a little bit. I went through a stage where I would literally hide in the car or go just go out at nighttime so I didn't have to be the only Because the problem is when you've got a clingy baby, they generally will go to your partner, but only if you're not there.

Otherwise they always want you. You are the only option to them, so you get lumped with doing everything. Even though that's not fair, you should totally take it in terms with your partners. You do like the nighttime routine and that sort of thing, so I highly advise you go and hide in your car or take yourself out for beverage. Just go read in the backyard if there's

somewhere you can hide. It sounds kind of awful, but long term, I mean long term, it won't work because you still have a clean baby, but it will give you a bit of breathing space so you're not really touched out and really overwhelmed. Removing yourself from the equation. So they only have the other parent. Husband left to me when my son was seven weeks old. Woof no communications or money, I have no village and my son is now two years old at daycare five days but

won't gel with a babysitter. Do I relinquish, knowing it's a phase and come out in a couple of years. Slash knuckle through question mark. What I would do is I would find that absolute fucker and rinse him for everything that he is worth. If you've got no idea where he is, get on the blower your phone. You will find him. I reckon. The queens of the Internet will have that bastard found within a few hours. So there's Facebook groups like sis is this your man? Or

tea time. You can post it anonymously as well. You don't need to give your own name away like obviously you would potentially be connected to him. Post a photo of him, saying the story or just saying, hey, who knows this guy? Who can tell me where he is? Type thing? Need to get into contact with the bastard. The queens will have this guy found within a few hours. Then you reach out to him. If he's blocked, you contact the bastard's boss, okay, contact his family members, serve

him with legal letters. If you can't afford it, there's definitely free legal aid, or just reach out to his employers, like threaten the bastard start just getting so petty and rogue on social media. The mature person if key was here, she'd probably be like, I think that you should just knuckle through and relinquish, knowing it to phase, but absolutely not. This fuck wit doesn't just get to live the rest

of his life a leaving a child. I mean, you certainly don't want him in your child's life anyway, but not a chance would he ever get custody after fucking off for two years. But like sis, get your money. He needs to help out, Okay, his seamen made the human. He's just a piece of shit and he needs to help you financially. Find the bustard and get into contact with his family and his boss. Get the police involved.

I don't really know what the legalities are in Australia, but it sounds like the bastard's doing something very illegal. Because that can't be right. And I am really sorry that you don't have a village and that your child won't gel with the babysitter. Hard relate to that. What I would say, though, is, depending on what area you're in, maybe jump on the eat Sleep Facebook group and just see if there's any other shitter out there that would love to grab a coffee one day and really try

to like start expanding your network. Join a netball team, take the two year old oh if you know you know that jokes from last year, or maybe wishful thinking, do those library you know those book things that Key recommends, the rhyming, singing things that the library, start making some friends, really put yourself out there. We'll link it in the show notes the episode to how to Make friends, because

it is really bloody hard when you're an adult. But I'm really sorry that happened to you, and that your child's father is such a piece of shit. I personally wouldn't just roll over and take that. However, I'm a vengeful bitch, So oh my god, I've just realized he was your husband. Wow, Okay, that just changes the game. I clearly didn't concentrate enough when I was reading that.

So you know these blokes family, you know these blokes like workplace, Well, get on LinkedIn and start getting on the blower and just absolutely rinsing this bastard because no one would be okay with that sort of behavior. Why does it feel like it would be easier to parent as a single parent. I'm not gonna lie. I feel like every single mother in particular has felt like this before. However, I think you probably just having a really bad day

or really bad week. If you are thinking like that, you need to really sit down and actually list out what you're doing versus what your partner's doing. I know it sounds very sexy, but I think it really can help if you logistically sort of map out what you're both responsible for and make sure that your partner is taking their fair share of the work, because they absolutely need to express that to your partner and potentially look

into marriage counseling or partner counseling, couple's counseling. Oh my god, Kelly, because I think it's a very normal feeling to feel. But it just means that you are really stressed and really overwhelmed, or maybe you've got a bloke similar to this. Why am I just assuming it's a bloke. It's because chicks don't behave like this unless you've got another piece of shit husband, in which case fuck him off, because yeah,

you would be better off. This one's so funny. My brother and sister in law have a perfect angel baby who sleeps fifteen hours a night. We have a terror toddler who we still put to sleep with fear and trembling, hard relate. They're very smug about it. Do I tell them they got lucky and not actually the next parenting gurus? Or am I just being a petty tired parent probably absolutely call them out. We need to have more humor

about these things. I've got a couple of girlfriends with angel children, angel babies that just actually are angels, And yeah, do my friends sort of think that it's because that they followed these parenting books to the tea or they just are angel parents potentially, But then a lot of them are also very realistic about, oh, they just got lucky. But I did say to one of my girlfriends when I was at Wayne Balley, because she was being so annoying and smug about her actual angel of a human,

I go, I fucking hope because she wants more. I was like, I hope your next one's a devil. And she was like, Kelly, you can't say that, and I said, yes I can, Yes, I can. You're being smug and you're being annoying, and it's nothing to do with you. The baby's just got a really good temperament. Actually, it probably does have something to do with her, because both her and her partner are so lovely and easy going

and calme. So, yeah, the baby's got their temperament. But I'm just like, you know what, do it in a really light way, because people need to be able to joke about this sort of thing, have a sense of humor. Hopefully they do too. I'm sure that they do. Most people do. Okay, So are you just being a tired and petty parent? Yes, but that's okay. It's annoying when

people are smug about things, all right. Also, I love to tell people that have really easy babies and children that their children are just going to grow up with no personality, and that all of the really spirited children are the people with really big personalities. Does that make me petty? It awful? Potentially, But does it make me

feel better astronomically? What's the worst thing about parenting? So generally, I would say their sicknesses and the fact that they give everything to you, and then you're expected to look after them even though you feel like death warmed up. You can't send them to daycare, even though that's where they got it. You've got to keep them home. You've got to pay for the daycare, and you don't get

paid because you're at home with them. And then you're dying and it takes them two days to get over something and it takes you two weeks, and you're never quite the same again with every single sickness. But after today, you know what I Am going to add to that list? The food I hungry? I eat I hungry. Oh, but you're not actually hungry. Literally, before I started recording, there was banana bread. There was grapes, There was a muffin,

There was strawberries. There was those chocolate covered rice crackers. There was sultanas. There was an old half eaten popper. Nothing because it wasn't what he wants to eat. But sometimes he doesn't even know what he wants to eat. They want to live off shit, and they are going to scream at you. Oh once again, probably only the sassy children that have a personality. Yes, I'm going to say that because it makes me feel better than just thinking to myself that I'm an awful mother. Yeah, I

would add the whole food thing to the list. I've given up in a lot of ways. I don't cook that much anymore, stuff specifically for him, because he wasn't eating anything, and most of it would end up thrown at me. Not it wasn't, that's an exaggeration, but it would just be left on the plate. And I'd spend so much money and slave so much time and I was like, I simply shall not be doing this. Have some baked beans, Fuck the microplastics, fuck the carcinogenics. You'll

be absolutely fine. If not, everything's giving as cancer, so we're all fucked anyway. I'm not sure if I want another baby. I like being able to give my little boy everything and give him all of my attention, and I'm not sure I want to split my time between multiple children. But am I being selfish not trying to give him a sibling. Not all siblings are close, and that's something that I need to remind myself of all

the time. But anyone that wants a good excuse or a good reason not to have a second child needs to come to me. Let's just start a one and done club. Okay, maybe that'll be a side project, a side podcast, if you will, where every single week I just got on a big rant for one reason about why I think that one child is perfectly sufficient. Okay, I'm going to give you the lowdown, which is actually what I was talking to my auntie about earlier, because

she was like, will you be having another one? And I was like, I don't have that many years left for people to be asking me that I understand why there's a question, especially with like close friends and family, but you know, at least in a couple of years, they won't ask because they were like, Oh, in a perfect world, would I like to have another baby? Yes? There are some caveats to that. Should I admit this out loud, probably not. Will it get me canceled? Potentially?

But I'm just going to be honest. If I was guaranteed a girl, I would be more likely to have another one. I know that it doesn't really matter, but it does, Okay. I absolutely love my little boy. I spoke a lot about ginger disappointment when I found out that I was pregnant with a boy, and I spoke about it, and people said, like, Lenny's going to find this article. Who He's going to find this topic that you've spoken about one day? How will do you think

that he will feel? I don't know. I think that he'll be absolutely fine because there's not a chance that that little shit head's not going to know just how loved he is. He is so loved, like he could not possibly be more loved, and I am so obsessed with him, and I can't actually imagine having any other child. You've also got to paint like, I don't know the next child that I have, so I don't love them yet.

So when I'm thinking about this hypothetical child, I don't know that child yet, so I'm just thinking about another lunatic toddler boy that I don't know, and I do not want that person in my house. Yes, of course I would actually love them, and yes, of course I would listen back to this conversation if I had another boy and go, you're a lunatic. You are obsessed with

your children. But if I'm thinking about it from the perspective and context of where I am at at the moment, I do not want to live with more boys in this house. And the ma gen only brew boys. Okay, they only do boys. I did like this Instagram post.

I can try to find it to share about like my pros and cons list having more children last year, and I thought it was really interesting because a lot of people gave their perspective and gave their advice, and a lot of people like, you're being a bit selfish because all of your reasoning is very short term, so

say within the next five years. And I thought that that was so valid, But then I spent six months out of last year thinking that I could literally die at the drop of a hat because I had a bomb in my brain, and it really changed things for me, because we are so presumptuous that, you know, when we think about having more children, it's because we want a really big family and we want a big you know,

a really full table at Christmas or whatnot. And you know, people say, oh, you need to think about what your life is going to look like when you're sixty, not now. But it's very presumptuous to just assume that we're going to get to sixty to eighty, to whatever age we've got in our mind that when we think of the future, Actually, five years is a very long time to be miserable, if not miserable, Okay that's a bit of a stretch,

but to have huge periods of misery. I thought that the validity of everyone saying not everyone, but a lot of people saying all of your reasons is so short term, like think about the long term pros, yes, but long term isn't guaranteed, and I also want to enjoy the short term. Well, like I said, I'm very pro one and done. Come and talk to me about it. At any time, you're not selfish as long as you make sure that your child has lots of time with other children.

It did break my heart finally enough this morning when he said, why don't I have a brother? And I was like, oh, there is not one day that goes by or maybe you know, if he's really sick, where he doesn't have a playdate of some sort with another child. His life is so full of other little kids. No, they're not siblings, but you're not guaranteed to get along with your siblings. And me and my siblings did not

get along when we were kids. Well we did, I guess when we're really little before like the Dickens, when we were growing up, literal punch ups. And then yes, as adults we're really close, but that's not guaranteed. I'm very lucky. You're not selfish. You well, maybe you are, but you've got to be selfish because no one else is going to put you first, so you have to. And it's totally okay to want to give you a kid all of your attention, everything you've got, because also,

having children is really expensive. I do not know how people have so many children if they live like in an expensive era. I mean everywhere is expensive these days. Resenting husband who gets to go to work is real. I'm a freelancer, so I can't replace his income consistently,

but I want to work dot or dot ideas. This is where a lot of people go wrong, I think, because they think of his versus her, like you're putting your two salaries together and just going who earns more, without really that both of you chose to have that baby, so both of you should be paying for the childcare, and both of you should get to go to work. Like it's not actually just about the money. So let's just say your partner's like, oh, you can't replace my income,

so you'll just have to stay at home and the baby. No, no, put the baby in daycare or get some sort of help for the I don't know how old this baby is or child is, and both of you equally pay for it and then you both go to work Like that just seems so silly that it's very common, but I don't think people are really thinking about it through because it's also your career, so your future earning potential that is impacted by the decision to stay home long term.

If you want to, then that is fantastic. Stay home as long as you want. But if you want to work, go work like. Your partner's going to have to sort that out with his boss because just because you earn less doesn't mean that it's not a priority. Or your partner needs to be home by a certain hour every day and then you can go out for a few

hours and do your work. Because you're freelance like, you need to come up with some sort of compromise because it's absolutely not fair that you're looking at it from the perspective, Oh, he earns more, so he gets to go to work. No, both of you chose to have that baby. Both of you have careers. You never know with freelance work. Yes, the tough times can be tougher,

but the higher times can be higher. So you know what, work your ass off, start earning more and then make him be a stay at home daddy and see how he likes it. I love being with my children, but I hate playing with them. How can I learn to love it? Once again? This is like such a you've just seen on social media or seen in pop culture that you're supposed to love it. You're absolutely not turn it into something that you want to do. Though, Okay, if we just did what Lenny wants to do all

the time, I would absolutely not love it. I've created games that I enjoy that then he enjoys doing kids. If you're doing it with them, they're pretty happy. We clean the walls sometimes, if the walls like, we do chores around the house. I don't really want to do that either, but they need to be done. We turn everything into a game. You might put some fun music on. We do adult puzzles instead of children's puzzles. He doesn't care. I try to get pretty pictures that he likes. Like

we're doing one at the moment. There's a boat, there's heaps of cool pretty flowers, there's heaps of animals. So no, it's not like a fifty piece or patrol puzzle, but it's a huge one and then it's like a big accomplishment where we get to finish it together. Also, just realize that it's not all about you, like, get them to do some stuff, and then sometimes you do have to play with them. But yeah, games that you like. I love playing Lego because I find it really fun.

It's very annoying when he tries to come and help me with my house. I'm like, no, no, you play over there. I really like to color. I love craft. So just pick and choose the things that you play with them with the things that you love, and then every now and then play something like I don't know hard and go seek that you don't want to, or bloody cars. I can't stand just pretending to push them.

So that's what I don't like playing. My two year old is unhinged and his big feelings are off the charts. I'm twenty two weeks pregnant. How do I keep my cool and employ good parenting techniques while absolutely exhausted. Well, I don't think you always need to keep your cool. I think that that is a silly, silly myth that social media and parenting experts have taught us. And then we feel really bad because we do lose our shits.

What I do now I try to think about what percent of the time I've lost my shit, and if it's a really small percent, I'm like, you did a good job today. You did a good job. It is very hard to deal with small people with such big feelings, and I can't imagine how hard it is when you're pregnant, probably not enjoying being pregnant. I don't know that many

people that do. Take a breath. Make sure that you're having enough space by yourself and space with other people that aren't your toddler, because yeah, that shit is absolutely rough, but be a little bit kind to yourself. You're doing the best that you can. How to stop two year old from spitting my my min This was sent in to someone that I think that they had a lot more faith in my parenting advice. What do you mean

your child is spitting like? Are they an alpacker? Are they or alarm or whatever it is that just goes or are they doing like a in which case I feel like it's probably pretty normal. I don't know that one. I really can't help with, no idea, no idea. It's kind of to me. Yes, it's of course a rude thing to be doing to strangers, but apart from being a little bit gross, it's kind of funny. I don't know how to transition toddler out of cot into single

bed because he's climbing out of KOT. He will just walk out if he doesn't want to sleep, As I think I mentioned this earlier in the episode. It's so crazy that like there's these sleep experts that make me feel like shit because they're like, oh, you're toddler needs to still be having least twelve hours of sleep in a twenty four hour period, so if they're not napping overnight,

and I'm like, sorry, what now? You cannot force someone to sleep that doesn't want to sleep, Like you can force them to sit in a very dark room with you with the sounds on, with no stimuli, and yes, eventually they will go to sleep because they are so tired after screaming their absolute head off. But yeah, you can't like just hold your child's eyes shut and hold them down with one arm and hope to God that they go to sleep. Some kids are really good sleepers,

and they're really good with disciplines. You say, hey, go to bed, it's bedtime, and they'll just go to bed. I still don't think that they probably are just falling asleep. Maybe they're just playing with their toys quietly in bed, or maybe they are, but then they probably have high sleep needs or they're just more disciplined children. I have a best friend that literally tells her three kids two, four and seven to go to bed, and they just at six thirty every night and they just go to bed,

do as they're told. And I think my Momi, my kid didn't have an app and I was still battling with him at nine pm. If they're climbing out of the cot, I would put them back in a snug sleepsack, especially as we're going into the colder months, because the sleep sack stops them from being able to get out of the cot, and that will stop them y eating themselves out of the cot. Otherwise, Yeah, you really can't force them to stay in bed. Do you love your

lifestyle or do you want more? Oh? Don't we always want more? Isn't that what life is about? Always driving for the next big thing. I'm pretty happy with my lifestyle though, and I know that I'm very lucky. I

have such a good group. I've got real good girlfriends, and I have the luxury because I only have one kid, and I guess because my finances allow that I can go out with them quite regularly, like I always at least one dinner a week with girlfriends, which I know is very unrealistic for a lot of people, which is why I said I'm very lucky. That's the sort of thing that keeps me so sane though. That's why I

think it's so important. I love netball. I love that I live so close to my sister and she's got kids the same age. Yes, and now that Lenny's that little bit older and more independent, I really love that I can do things like go to Bali for a long weekend because Bali is my favorite place in the entire world. So yes, I love my lifestyle. Yes, I of course want more, namely a little bit more space in a house. But yeah, I think that that's what

that question means. Okay, next question, no village. I have endo and fatigue, need IVF to conceive thirty six years old, sitting on the fence whether to try to conceive baby number two if it's even a possibility. I have a three year old miracle already. Oh, I'm probably the wrong person to usk because I'm going to tell you to go back and listen to my reasoning on one and done. I don't know. It just sounds like a lot of further heartbreaking work, time, money, your body putting it on

the line for the potential of another baby. Uh, it depends how much you want it. I guess I would say that, yeah, you've already got one miracle, and just really enjoy every moment of that. How to get rid of the dummy. My baby is two years and four months. Lenny was almost three when he got rid of the dummy completely. Everyone has different advice about when to get

rid of the dummy. I reckon you do what's right for you, or whoever is giving you advice that you're trusting, because I just think like, let's take a little bit of pressure off ourselves. Everyone that was like, oh, yeah, but they're going to need dental work. Sorry, Me and my husband have both had braces twice. Okay, he is going to need dental work anyway. Things aren't looking good in the mouth department. If it's not affecting this speech too much, I don't know, is it really something that

we're going to worry about. They're not going to be taking a dummy to school with them, are they. So from about two we moved the dummy to just bedtime and nap time or like a car trip or whatnot. My thing was three. Because the pediatric that we have used since Lennie was really little, I just go by what he says okay, because I think it's easier just to follow one person's advice rather than listening to twelve

million different people's advice. That's why I mean what I mean when I say, you find one person, follow their advice, he said. At Lenny's two year old checkup, I was like, oh, he still has a dummy. He was like, don't worry about it, just get rid of it by three. I'm a stickler for the rules and I'm scared of authority. So a couple of weeks before his third birthday, I was like, ah, no, we need to get rid of it now before I take him for his three year

check up. For Lenny, I simply said to him one night, I was like, okay, Bud, you're a big boy now. You don't need several forms of comfort. You can either sleep in mummy's bed, mummy and daddy's bed without a dummy, or you can sleep in your bed with the dummy. And I said this to him because I trusted my child and my knowledge of my child enough to know that hands down, he would choose to sleep in my bed with me as his comforter any day over the dummy. That's how he ended up in our bed full time,

but without the dummy, so small wins right. He has actually since moved into his bed again without the dummy. But yeah, it was just as simple as that, like offering up something better the option they have to choose an option. Toddler's like to feel like they're in charge, so you need to sort of give them. You know, some people say that bribery is really bad. I think that bribery is great if it works. Give them something

that they want more than the dummy. If you have like a really spiritual child that you can't just be like, oh, the dummy fairy or what other people use. And he still does have it. Sometimes he'll get it in the morning when he first wakes up for an hour or so. I don't care. He literally just wants to suck on it for comfort for an hour when he first wakes up in the morning. You know what, I don't want to speak twenty one for the first hour in the morning until I've had a cup of coffee. Really, we

all have our little vice in the morning. I don't really care if that's what he wants. At this point of view, he's still really little help. I have a sister in law who can't help but overstep boundaries and interview. I hate conflict, but how can I get her to butt out? Well, she's not your sister. Get your partner to talk to her. That is so unfair that it's all on you. It's your partner's sister. Your partner needs to do the dirty work. Okay, that's all I have

time for today. I've really enjoyed having a tipple with you. Hopefully you've found my advice a little bit entertaining, probably not that helpful, but you know, it is what it is. If you enjoyed this style of content, let me know because I can definitely do this once a month or so until Ms Keay Reese manages to rip her nipple away from Suki Bear. Her name's not Suki, it's Suki,

but I like to call her Suki anyway. This episode was you know what, we can't even really say produced when it was this bad by myself Kelly McCarran, with the audio production by the delightful Maddie Joiner, who has

to listen to this absolute mess. Apologies, please retin view or don't if you really didn't enjoy it, and I'll be back with you next week, hopefully, unless I throw another overwhelmed tantrum and can't give you anything with another episode of the Unhinged podcast for your Ears about the madness that is motherhood and everything in between.