Dear Pregnancy, We Have A Few Complaints

We acknowledged the traditional custodians of the land we're recording on today.

It got worse.

I was like laying on the tiles basically screaming, and I said to him.

You have to call an ambulance.

Go because there is nothing that I can do that is making this pain go away. Like I am starting to panic because I can't get a handle on the pain. I was like, it's not a good pain. It's a bad pain.

Hello, and welcome back to Eat, Sleep, Shit, Repeat, a wildly unhinged podcast about the madness that is motherhood and everything in between.

I'm Kelly McCarran and I'm Key Resells. And Monday happened to be our Kingshitter's birthday.

Oh yes it whah. I am now at the same age as you, so you are no longer older and wiser. No comeback for that, abosltly, no come back? All right, come back? Well what are we talking about today? Today's episode is a bit of a funny one. We've covered some pretty heavy thing but drenched them in humor. And there is no better way to kick things off than a tale about your pit involving an awful lot of packed pooh oh.

God forgot about this. So last week we spoke about your hospital and.

We click baited, we click baited a little bit and someone else being in the hospital the exact same time. Yeah, sosent represented the go go anyone else in there at the same time. Oh my god. It was actually wild to hear that.

You were like I called you being like, hey, I'm in hospital, and you're like so was I. Anyway, let me take you back. I woke up on a couple of Saturdays ago. Charlie has had such a bad back since Europe, just with all of the lifting and carrying that he had to do because I was pregnant, and he woke up with terrible back pain. We've been back for about a week, and I said, I'll get up with Rue. We'll make pancakes. You know, I'm trying to be like good mom Aaras Smith exactly, Glenorousmith.

And then we poured the butter into the pan. Anyway of this, so I said wait one minute, and they.

But so we made pancakes and Rue loved it. I was like yeah, and then kind of sat down to watch cartoons or something on TV, and I was like, oh, I kind of need to do a little poo. So I decided that I would go and do that and started to you know, push, and then I started to get really really hot.

It was like a cold sweat.

So I stripped off, like completely naked on the loo and then I was like, oh oh, I felt like my blood pressure had dropped, and I was like, I need to like lay down. So then I lay down on the tiles of the bathroom.

Flooring better when you're feeling that dizzy, and those cold tiles so nice and even like when you're prenant on your bellies.

And then this pain all of a sudden started and it was a really sharp pain.

It was constant.

I did not get a reprieve from it, and it felt like something inside of my stomach had twisted.

You know.

I'm trying to move positions to see if the pain.

Eases, like just to pain. E run a picture Charlie's in bed, You're naked on the tiles.

Rus watching TV.

Thank God, what did we do without TV?

Honestly, honestly, And then I'm just like, oh, oh, God or God, and like, I have had some pretty intense pain with this pregnancy, and my obstetrician who I'm no longer working with, but we'll get to that in a couple of episodes.

She had said that her Bye Mike, she had said.

That I have really tight ligaments and that ligament pain can be excruciating, and said that that's what my pain had been. And I'd already been to hospital once with this pain. This was not the same pain and a completely different spot. This was on my lower left where

Is Charlie still sleeping.

Yeah, he's still sleeping. I get into bed and I'm like, oh, babe, bye. I am like not well, like something's going on.

I've got really bad pain.

And then I just started moaning from the pain because I did not have a reprieve and it was like a ten on the pain scale. Right, I feel like my pain tolerance is a lot higher than it used to be. And it scared me because this did not stop, and I could not get into any position and I was just like, oh my god, Oh my god.

And then Ruth.

Started coming in and she's like mommy, mommy, trying to calm me. But I was like, Charlie, you've got to get her away because I need to focus on whatever this is. She's like, okay, I'll take her out and just like let me know if it gets worse. He didn't make it out the door because basically it got worse. I ran back to the bathroom. I tried to push again.

Because I was like, we still butt naked. I was butt.

Naked on the floor in the weirdest position. Like they saw it all right.

They would have seen it before, and they were so nice.

I would just like ask me all the questions, you know, and they came really quickly because obviously the triples are on. Knew that I was pregnant and we weren't sure what the pain was, so that was good. And then they said, okay, we're going to give you the green whistle, and I was like in my head, fucking yes, I'm going to get some help here. The pain's gonna go away a green whistle. It's an inhaler and they're green, that's why

And you were like, no, betting. You were sucking on that green whistle like you suck.

And the thing is She's like, it's going to taste a bit gross, and so I couldn't even like inhale it to begin.

I was like coughing up.

So I was like, oh my god, this fucking thing on TV. They make it look so good. Just chemicals, Oh yeah, chemically gas anyway, so I make it down my.

Thirty eight stairs, which can.

You imagine in a ten pain because I've got to get out of the apartment. I would have thought they stretched you if I had been completely immobile, Yes, but it was too dramatic.

Yeah, so I'm like walking.

I mean I thought they were going to but when I realized we were walking, I was like, all right, keep it moving, keep it moving.

I hope you put clothes on. Yeah. They were like, okay, so let's get dressed. I was like, yeah, let's get dress. It's so embarrassing.

After I got down the third eight steps and took this giant step into the ambulance, I'm like laying there. By this time, the adrenaline's kicked in and I'm like shivering and shaking and trying to suck on this green thing. And like it's also a bit trafficky because it's a Saturday morning.

To get the sirens on. They didn't have the sirens on because they know it's not but I come on, you're in pain and you're pregnant. I would use your light. I would have loved that.

So they take me to ed at the Royal and this is the thing, right, they get me out, we're walking into ED and then they're like, oh no, no, she's pregnant. You have to take her to the Royal Women's Hospital.

They're all bloody joined.

It's so confusing. So then I had to walk all the way back to the ambulance and we had to know with the paramedics.

And then we had to drive to the around the corner.

Yeah, but they stretched me. I was in a stretcher, so that was fine.

Year.

So they stretched me to ED and they're like no, no, no, You've got to go to the delivery suite. So then they Richard me there and I.

Was just saying he would have been panicking at that point, like I'm not ready to deliver. Oh I know. And actually when I called Charlie, I'm.

Like, I'm in a delivery sweet. I didn't give details because I wasn't thinking about that. But he gets to eat in They're like, oh, she's in the delivery suite and the guy's like in the lift with him taking him there, like one of the nurses and he's like, oh, so big day having a baby, and Charlie's just like, I hope not. I couldn't even speak so concerned about you know, whether like we can't have a baby, like it's way too early.

Yeah.

But anyway, I get to the delivery suite, the midwives come in and they're kind of treating everything and just doing a once over, like my belly. They're like, okay, well, your belly's nice and soft, so we're not too worried about baby. We'll do a dop bler to check the heartbeat. Heartbeats all good. We're going to give you some pain relief. And I was like, fuck yes. By then, it's probably

Yeah.

So by them when they're like feeling my bows and being like oh wow, okay, it feels like you're quite backed up, blah blah blah.

Oh so they've diagnosed you by this point.

Well, they've done a check and they've felt my bows and they can feel where it's tender. They're like, there's this tender and it's only tender on one side. They're like, we can feel it, we can feel it, but will wait till the doctor comes or whatever to do the actual diagnosis. They're like, we're not worried about baby, but when did you last do a movement? And I said, oh, well, I.

Love the language that they use. Can they not just say shit?

Yeah? When do you take a big shit?

Yeah?

Well it had been a while and when I thought about the frequency of my bow movie.

You don't often think like, it's not like you notes down your poos right well, and if you weren't feeling uncomfortable up until that point, well that's the thing.

And typically I have I'm not a good power and I have a really lazy bow. So for me to go once a week is actually pretty normal. They had given me the gas.

Sorry.

When I got there, the gas was amazing. It just took the edge off. But then before the doctors came, they said, okay, so the doctors want you to stop using the gas because we need you to be coherent when they're here to you.

Basically weren't responding in any sentence.

No, I was high as a kite and I was fucking loving it.

Yeah that much.

I can still feel the pain, but it took the edge off. And then as soon as I stopped the gas, the pain was back and forth. Anyway, So we got through that, got through to concert with the doctor. I'm taking them of a cole. I talk about six sashets. I've taken the laxatives and at some point I fall asleep for a few hours.

Awake up about.

Six pm and nothing had come out by this point by any means, but I think it had kind of got things going anyway. They're like, yep, doctors don't need to see you with just double checked the happy for you to be discharged.

I was like, amazing.

We start to get out of bed and I'm like just getting dressed again, and then i feel a faint bit of pain and I'm like it's okay.

It's fine, it's awkwod, don't worry about it.

Say goodbye to the midwives. One of the midvies was so cute. She wrote me like a little thing like warm limb and water with every meal, like stewed fruits. So she was like you know you need to do this. This is really going to help prepare. Yeah, and I was like, hey, so the birthing Sweet to the emergency department, which is where Charlie parked, is probably a ten minute walk, and it's just like down in the lifts across down

Get the car.

The car was five minutes away, like in the garage. And in that five minutes, I had walked myself back into ED and I just said to them, Hey, I've just been discharged, but do you mind if I just sit here. I'm not feeling very well. My pain I think is coming back, and could you get me some water? And he was like, yep, absolutely. Anyway, in the two minutes that it took for him to come out from behind the glass, I had started vomiting.

I was on all fours, so I was on my knees. Was it a pack to ED?

It wasn't as packed as I've seen it, but there were people. People were like, are you okay?

And I'm like, no, God, the drama I know I.

Was on my knees vomiting into a bag. This nurse comes out and she says, do you have a virus like a U okay? And I said no, no, no virus. And she's like, are you in pain? And I said yes, I'm in pain. And I was like, I've just been discharged, and so she like and I put my wrist out and she like scander it or whatever. Anyway, they basically took me and readmitted me. So I got admitted into the emergency department.

And short stay.

Not having short stay, this was like the examination area, okay. So I went in there and by this time, so Charlie had come with Ruber.

He's like, where'd you go? She's like, shit it Charlie come heah? Is that her?

I am streaming like from the pain on all shill chills.

I'm like to Charlie, do something.

You have to help me, like you have to make them help me, like this has like been twelve hours at this point, like with a little bit of you know, what's through doing. She looked concerned the whole time, because I was just like, fuck, this is probably gonna star.

And I know if kids are psychopass, she probably would have thought it was funny and you were playing a game.

Yeah, so true. But there was this really cool doctor on the ward and he said, was it doctor Matt?

I don't know if it was.

That's the thing.

I don't photo. Oh you've got a photo, of course I do. I love him.

Shut up, that's so funny. I didn't take any photos, and helpless I had take a photo. I just googled him, like.

Okay, that gay, we'll look at that. So so basically they.

Come in and he's like, we're gonna get you pain relief.

And basically it sounds like doctor Matt. I reckon, it's doctor Matt. It does.

And in two seconds, this amazing female doctor comes in and she's like, so, what's happened today? And I said, I cannot talk Charlie.

So he quickly told her and are you cranky at this point? No, I wasn't.

Cranky at this point. I was calm. I was calm because I'd been helped.

Yeah, but as you said, it's been twelve hours, you're still there.

Nothing's moved, nothing's moved, and I'm just like, I just don't want to feel pain. I was just tired anyway. So She's like, Okay, we're going to put an r iv in and we're going to give you morphine. And it was like music to my ears because morphine is just fucking an instant.

You know. Wait, can I just quickly show you? Yeah, yeah, show me. That is him. I'm not even kidding.

That is him. He is the one who was like, we are getting you pain relief. Oh my god, I actually could cry that to find Doctor Matt and just tell him that he is the best doctor in the whole world. He was the only one who saw me as a person in pain, I say, and.

The only one that actually cared for you.

Yeah, I think, and I get it. We do care about the baby, but at this point it had been so long. So yeah, after he was like, we're going to get your pain relief, she came in, had to quick chat with Charlie. But as she's chatting with Charlie, she's putting a canula into my veins and within I reckon less than ten minutes, I got a dose of morphine. Yes, and it was instant, and I just lay there being like this is good. This is like the best I

That's not okay, are you talking about this? I knew that you must be talking about my maid, so that our saviors were the same guy. I'll save you well, you know what. It's also someone will know.

We need to send him a bunch of flower saying how are you.

Doctor Matt da You do not remember us, but we actually have a podcast together and we're in this hospital on the same weekend, and you helped both of us when not really listening to us.

And I also just I could hear the consults that he was doing and he was kind, so kind, so kind, calm.

And acting Director Prince of Wales Emergency Department. What a legend. Why do I know that donuts? Yeah? Have I googled him extensively since yes you have?

Yeah, yeah, shout out to him. If anyone knows the moves listening, just let him know you've got two fangals.

Honestly, just like it makes such a difference when someone shows you that bit of compassion, and yeah, yeah it is. That's so weird though, that we're both talking about this. I know what are the cancels.

So I got the morphine and by then it's probably like a thirty and I just said to Charlie like, look, you go home. There's no point and you're staying here with Rue, like you go home. So they left and I was like kind of relieved because I was like, you guys have been there the whole day, and.

Ru was so good.

She just was so chill the whole day. When I slept, she had a little sleep with me on the bed. I sent you the phone.

It's actually so sadly. It's not cute, it's sad. It's really sad anyway.

So then they were kind of like, all right, we're going to move you to short Stay soon, and we need you to do about movement before you leave.

Once again, because we need you to say.

We need you to shit, we we.

Need you to move that pooh, we gotta go.

So they moved me to short Stay and I said, am I going to be here overnight? And they said, yeah, you're going to be here every night, so prepare for that. So I was like, okay, so cool, Chyler that tomorrow it's all good. And the morphine it lasted so long, like I was like, I'm sitting in burd being like I'm cured, Like the pain, what pain is gone?

It's completely gone.

I'm so fine now, mother, cool, Yeah, I'll take another sashet mabicore give it to me.

How many sachets have you had at this point?

Oh?

So many?

I reckon I had twelve, supply, it was so much. They were kept checking on me, how have you done a pooh? And I'm like, nothing is moving. Nothing's moving. I don't know what to tell you anyway. So I go to sleep and I'm like, well, hopefully something gets moving in the morning.

I don't know.

And then I wake up at four twenty two and the pain is faint, and I go to the bathroom because I'm like, maybe the pain is good pain signal.

Hey, go to the toilet.

Tried no, So I knew that I probably had a space of ten to fifteen minutes for them to get some pain relief ready for me. Otherwise I was going to be in pain again, because that's how quickly it came on after lad I had that big rest. So I go back to my bed, I ring the buzzer and I'm like, hey, my pain's coming back. Can I please have some pain relief? And they're like, yeah, that's fine. We need to get the doctor to come and see you to talk to you about that, and they'll like

And saw me.

She was really lovely. We just want to double check with the obstetrics team to make sure that they're okay with whatever we give you, and we want you to do an ultrasound and I was like, okay, cool, easy, So I wait, I wait. The obstetrics team come, they do another little scan. Babies all good.

Can they see the pooh?

They can like see the mass there. Yeah, so they're like, there is a mass there, but we want to confirm it on a proper ultra sound because they've just got like a shitty one and ned and they're like, we're not going to give you any more morphine because.

We've already had it.

We don't want to give that to the baby. We want something a bit small, slow release, so we're going to give you end don And I was like, fine, I will take whatever you will give me as long it is is actually something that's substantial. So that was maybe like five thirty, so it's probably been an hour by then. I then waited two more hours and.

To get pain relief. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's.

A three hour mark. So they're all rushing around. That's fine, and one nurse came up to me and said, are you okay, like how's your pain? And I'm like, well, I'm still waiting on the pain relief and she's like, okay, well we'll get you some morphine. I was like, well, the obstetric scene was just here and they said no morphine that they were going to give me end Don. She's like, oh, En, don't, okay, I'm gonna go get you end Don. Then she didn't come back for half

So which isn't their fault, like of course. And then so I have.

So many friends that are nurses, so much respect for them. I understand what they're doing. The short though exactly end.

Of the shift.

I get it, so I let them do the handover, and then after the handover was done, there was nothing. I was like, when the hell is the check in right now? I'm waiting for pain relief. And by this stage I've started.

Moaning or screaming again.

I need to go to the bathroom. So I'm literally attached to so they've had me on like saline, like ivy or whatever for my fluids, and I'm like inching the thing forward by and I'm walking it's like across the hallway to the bathroom. But by then I'm like screaming, so I'm like hobbling to the toilet and she's like, are you okay?

Do you need help?

And I was like I needed help three hours ago. I have had no pain relief. Did you say that for three hours?

Yeah?

I was like, good, I need to go to the bathroom. Anyway, I go to the bathroom, I come back out. I am crying, like I'm in so much pain. I'm frustrated no one is listening to me. I'm like I have reached my absolute limit of what I can physically and mentally handle it. This pain is like pain I've never experienced, way worse than my labor pain. And remember my epidural did not work during like yeah, but at least with labor like not everyone, but I had like reprieves like

Say when you said that.

Well, when she came back, I was like on the bed on all fours again because it was like the only kind of position I could get into where I could like rock back and forth. It didn't do anything, but like you know, little things are trying to help distract. Yeah, And she's like, oh, how can I help me? And I was like, I don't want you to help me. I need to have another nurse, like I have been waiting for so long.

She's like, we did.

Handover and I'm like, I know you did handover. I listened to you do your full handover and then I waited another half an hour for you to come, like I want a different nurse please. And then I called Charlie and I was like, I need you in the hospital right now.

To help advocate for you.

Yeah, I'm like they're not listening to me. I need you to advocate for me, Like they're not taking me seriously with the amount of pain that I'm in The doctor came back, but it was probably about ten or fifteen minutes, and it's the doctor that I saw at four thirty in the morning, and she goes, hey, are you okay? And I'm like, oh my god, I'm so relieved to see you. I'm like, I haven't had any

It's so broken.

And also I know statistically, as a woman of color in a hospital, well.

That's what I was just thinking.

I'm not always taken serious.

You have dealt with racism several times, so yeah, that's like would have been upsetting as well, because you're like, I don't want to be the angry black woman or the black woman that's asking for the drugs exactly.

And it was a really difficult moment for me because I was like, even when I'm at my most vulnerable a pregnant woman and excruciating pain, now it's still some level of not taking me seriously. And I was just like really frustrated by that because I had been calm all the way through when I felt people were listening to me.

But it's like I.

Don't want to have to like demand a new nurse to make a point about like I need help.

And I need you to take me. So what time is that?

So four point thirty five, thirty six thirty seven thirty I got parently for eight am. So then they took me for the extent of ultrasound and it confirmed that the ultrasound lady was like that is a giant pooh, and I was like I'm away and she's like really good luck with that. Good luck, but baby's all okay. That was like my main thing. I kept being like, is baby Okay's baby okay?

Oh?

I forgot to say in a monst that like when I'd had the morphine and the short stay and stuff, they had done three different types of enemas, so they had put like, yeah.

So you've just had a moving things up your button, yeah, down your golob to try to help things move, and nothing's moving. Yeah.

And by this time I've messaged my girlfriend's being like, hey, your best friends got a huge pooh stuck in her like what do you who? Were nurses who, what do you guys recommend? And one of them mentioned a fleet enema, And so I kept hearing about this fleet enema. But then the thought was maybe the pooh was up too high because the actual enemas that are kind of down in your lower boughs.

Oh I forgot. Also, the doctor put.

Her finger at my bum to try and break the pooh mass, but realized there's actually no poo down in my lower bow, that the obstruction's up my upper bus.

So she was just fingering, you're a noose and she's like, no, there's nothing there.

Ding. It was the end of her shift, and she was like, do you want me just to go in there and break it up? And I'm like, do you want to do that? Like you're just about to leave, like the fact that you've offered that to me, like she's a kind, you are a kind?

No, doctor, I can't doctor. I was like yeah, And so.

That was pretty confronting and uncomfortable. But the fleet anime, everyone saying it's probably not going to work because it's too far up. Imagine like a popper do you call them that? And Queensland like, do you know the little juice boxes? Y?

Yeah?

Yeah, okay, so imagine juice box size, not that shape, but that size basically of like salty water. It's like a saline solution and they squeeze that bottle.

Yeah.

So she goes, Okay, what I'm going to do with I'm going to put your bed on an angle because gravity really helps. And I said, okay, well, how long do I need to keep you know, this solution in my ears? Basically, she's just like squeezing this whole bottle of saline water up my ass and then I have to clench and hold it for as long as possible. But of course all you want to do is like push it out, push it out, because it's like anyway, She's like, well, fifteen minutes is ideal but I don't reckon,

To hurt going in. It was just really uncomfortable, really really uncomfortable, like anything in my butt. I don't typically either, it's not my mind. I'm going to be fair in this circumstance. You're probably please.

I was like, put a hose up there and suck it out literally like one of those like a colonic Yeah. No, I wish that I had something like that.

I did ask. I was like, do you have anything like that?

No? So then I went to the bathroom, and to be honest, it was just really the water that came out. But then afterwards I felt so ill because it had basically stirred everything up, but it did what it was supposed to do, right, because that was the big thing

You were in hospital for several days because you could not you were actually full of pooh exactly.

Yeah, and then like eating, I was scared to eat, yeah, because you know, eating the pancakes is what brought the Pooh thing on. So I was like eating tiny, tiny bits of food and it was honestly the worst pain I've ever been in my life, and the worst like

True, there just would be no way, Like I have you been pooped like on the rig.

Well it's now a week later or two weeks, like two weeks today, and I had my first proper bowel movement where.

I like pushed yesterday. Oh my god.

Everything else has just been like soft stool kind of coming out fine, but not anything like substantial and like together. And like the first time I had a proper one was yes Sunday. Thank God, I know, but I'm just so scared it's gonna happen again. So now I'm eating chea seeds left, right and center. I'm trying to eat lots of fibrous foods, trying to drink In fact, that's just reminded me to drink some water. But any mums out there suffering from severe constipation while you're pregnant, do

Ever, you do not as nice as doctor Matt is. You don't want to meet him. No, what's your peak?

I got out of hospital on the Monday, and then it was the long weekend in New South I was, but also Queensland that following weekend, and I began the week being like, I'm not going to be out. We have planned to go to Bangalow and then my two best friends and their husbands and kids come and stay with us at the bangalo and I was just like I can't get through this, and I was really umming

Yeah, exactly. And it was just so beautiful.

The kids are playing like it was just nice, like seeing everyone together, seeing the husbands together, seeing my gorgeous sister in lawd Georgie, who's also pregnant. She's ten days behind me, so we're kind of going through this together, which is really lovely. No, she's fine. I mean, I don't want to out her constipation, Allline, but she has been taking care of herself, That's what I'll say. But yeah, I think it was. You know, sometimes you are like,

But sometimes the best thing that you can do is just power on through and then you're like, oh, you never regret doing those things exactly. Now, before we get into today's episode, we do want to acknowledge the privilege of being pregnant, and just a warning if you are struggling at the moment with your fertility, this episode might not be for you because it might seem a little bit silly and insensitive. Yeah, definitely.

Pregnancy. Many many women fall pregnant at some point in their life. Not everyone wants the pregnancy or is able to keep the pregnancy, but if we're generalizing, an awful lot of the XX population will experience it, and I am currently one of those experiencing it as I am with child.

And I'm currently very glad that I am not with child because what sort of fresh hell is it where you end up in a hospital full of your own face?

Is?

Shush you?

So we thought we'd have a little complaint sesh today about pregnancy and all the woes we have trying to bring a charm into the.

World, including almost self combusting with poop. All right, I'm sorry. We've passed the pit part of it. Now it's just time to make fun of you.

Right, Well, I'm slowly getting to the humor part of it.

She pregnancy complaint number one. Yeah, nausea and vomiting, Yeah, what the fuck?

Yeah, it's pretty annoying. I didn't have that the first time around, but you bet you I've got it this time.

Of course you do. Of course you do now with the toddler and toad as well.

The nausea is just so insane, isn't it, Like you just constantly feel na She's like if I moved too quickly, or like I was packing for Bangalow and had a little vomb and it was just because I was bending over packing and stuff feeling nauseous.

The vomiting, like never before in my life have I just vomited, Oh, different things, like even when I was past the proper morning sickness, except it's not morning sickness, it's just all day yeah sickness. We really need to update that, Like just randomly different other points of my pregnancy, I just vomit. Oh you ate too much? You tell me to full vomit. Yes, that didn't agree with you. Your

It's so physical, isn't it, Like you're literally like.

Like a catt that's gross. Every now and then I meet somewhere that's like a dainty throw opera where they just go and it comes up. Those people are violent.

Yeah, I'm like my eyes are watering and popping out of my head.

Mine was so bad through five to sixteen or seventeen weeks no caffeine because I was that sick. What did you do? It was awful? And so then I started taking the tablets and I had alarm set on my phone. I've got like some of the funniest, saddest videos of Luke filming me at like three and when I've said an alarm to wake up to eat something like, I had crackers and stuff next to my bed, so my tummy was never empty.

I have been feeling that mine is bad, but it's never woken me up being nauseous. You about it, but yours, I think yours was really severe. I just had to like be on top top of it. And it's crazy because, like I.

Mean, luckily it was during COVID, but it's wild that you're the sickest you've ever been. You can't tell people about it, you're not supposed to tell people about it. But during that period is when you're so.

Sick and you're still got to work and do all of the things I.

Just men could never. Men could never. I think they know that they could never complain. Number two pregnancy tidness.

Well, this one I've got a real bone to pick with because first time around, didn't get that tired, like a little bit ti oh, I might have a little nap because I've got no other responsibilities. This time around, it was the most debilitating time. And I feel like it's only.

Just just ease you've stopped having to need the nap. Yeah, it'll start up again. I will warn you.

Well, I was just gonna say, if we have a big day doing something like in Bangalore, we had it. We went to the farm, so we just went out to the restaurant in the morning for breakfast. But it's a farm, so the kids are running around. I was a bit hot. I napped for the rest of the day. Yeah, didn't I But I never realized how debilitating the tiredness

Would be upset or she'd have to have a nap here, but all my.

Eyes would just shut and I would be asleep. So it was really dangerous, like driving that kind of thing.

I just didn't.

Realize how debilitating the exhaustion could be.

It's so much worse than postpartum tightness.

Yeah, it hits differently, because.

I think postpartum tightness is worse mentally, but physically, yeah, you just it's because you've got this human and you would just never I remember when my sister just kept saying to me, I promise you it ends as soon as you birth the baby. You're not feel this tired, Like every single bone in your body feels tired. And mine also eased up in my second trimester, but then it came back with a vengeance in tremester three. But

Yeah, so it makes sense that the afternoon nap was heaven for some reason. I could always sleep so well in the afternoon, but then at nighttime it was like tossing and turning. Insomnia, isn't it. Yeah, that's also a complaint that's coming up.

So pregnancy tiredness. Oh not not happy. Complaint number three? What the fuck is sciatica? And why does my whole body hurt? Yeah?

I haven't had sciatica specifically, but the whole body hurting, Like, why am I hobbling around.

Because all of your joints and ligaments are moving as well. It's horrible. It's honestly like horrible. Pregnancy is absolutely wild. I used to just have to get into the on all fours to stretch out my back because that was the only comfortable position I would be in, and I

I can tell you that's already started. I noticed it on the weekend. I was very short of breath.

Why why because.

You sitting on my lungs smushing them, smushing them to make room for their little baby body.

You don't realize that. You're like, well, yeah, like breathing is such a struggle, and you sound like an elderly man that's been smoking three packs a day.

Oh yeah, you're full up to like, yeah, you know, your shoulders almost.

And everything's a struggle. I can't believe that people let me podcast up until the day I gave burn.

I know, that was pretty funny.

Why would you let someone podcast when they're like and then this, Yeah, that wasn't good. That wasn't good. The shortness of breath is not cute. Number five is constipation. Well, I think I've covered that one, haven't I just a little bit. My pooing is I'm a good poo But every single day I had to have a shot of thinking because it was just so like I was still so backed up during where pregnancy. It's a very common pregnancy symptom.

Yeah, so then imagine if you don't pooh normally, just he's dire literally backed out. Moving on. Complaint number six is reflux. Why am I insidees burning?

I forgot about this until I was researching.

Yeah, no, no, no, as you started, No, it hasn't. I mean I've had like a sporadic here or there, like maybe twice.

That's it. Another reason for the random vomit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If the reflux gets too bad, it's horrible, honestly.

And like I was with Beck because she's recently had a bud but in her like last trimester and she's just about to give birth, she just would stop me in conversation and grab out the old gavesol and pop one and just be like, sorry, my fucking heartburn reflex.

It's so bad. It feels like something's just raising your throat burning. I used to pop those like candy. Yeah, yeah, exactly, exactly one. It's like, no, you cannot. Next up is you're full all the time. Like you're supposed to be eating more, well, not as much as what people like to eat, but yeah, you're supposed to eat normally at least, well you're supposed to eat regularly.

So I think a lot of us probably don't eat regularly, or we can skip meals if we've got a meeting or whatever.

But when you're pregnant, you need to eat. But the issue is it's not a room for the food that you need. No room. I am a big eater, and I who usually could smash a pizza. Towards the end of my pregnancy, I'll never forget because it was just a horrible thing. I could eat Max two slices.

Oh yeah, I was like a half burger, like and done.

Charlie loved it. Yeah, actually he would. Luke actually probably did too, because he was always.

Like seconds and I'm like, oh, And as soon as.

The baby came out, I was like, give me that Jack that room again. In fact, I got some more room because my organs still haven't shifted back into please. Like sometimes I still think when I am finishing off my pizza, I still am thinking, how did you only eat two slices? Max?

I mean your stomach there's just no there's no room, no room.

Where are you supposed to put this food that you're eating.

Yeah, I don't know, it's not like the baby's taken any And.

Then if you get g D. You can't eat so many different things.

Yeah, I've never had that, Thank goodness, I'm not over the hump yet. But bloody hell, that sounds stressed. No, No, I haven't done it yet.

You probably know. Oh I don't know. I think you know. Complaint number eight mental health goes to the toilet. Oh. Then in my notes so I put I'm like.

Key, Yeah, I didn't have bad mental health for my first pregnancy.

No, the mental health goes to the toilet. I'mlike key, Oh that it was just another poojo.

Can I just say though, in the second pregnancy, my mental health has.

Been so bad. Oh, it's been awful, so bad, and like you are like unhinged.

I just have been so like I can't do this. And I remember actually saying that in the hospital, like when I was in the birthing suite when they were doing their assessment and stuff, and I remember just like not pleading, but like saying to Charlie like I can't, like I can't go through with this pregnancy, Like I can't do this.

It's so hard.

The whole pregnancy has been hard. And one of the midwifes is like, we're not delivering the baby today. Does she know that? And I'm like, no, the pregnancy woman, it's been really hard, okay, yeah, but like.

And it's also been a really hard year.

Yeah, so just shout out to anyone who does have bad mental health through pregnancy. It makes it a lot harder than you can imagine. You just feel really defeated.

And you feel very alone as well. Yeah, and every like physical things and working becomes so much harder. So than you're feeling like useless at different things.

It's you just don't feel particularly good at anything. And I don't even feel good at making the baby because you're so ill and uncomfortable.

Yeah, even though the baby's happy as anything inside.

Just bouncing around, don't feel that. It's really difficult. And I think having a really dreamy pregnancy first time around and then having this pregnancy, the comparison's been really hard, night and day. It's been really hard to kind of live through that because we made the decision to have a second and everyone tells you this, it might not be the same, and you're like, yeah, that's fine. Had we not had a big grief event it happened at the start of the year, I probably would have been

Hard because you're getting physical symptoms as well, and it's just so hard. And even though it's like a common thing that lots of people do, just because it's common doesn't make it any easy, right. I just never had felt lonely in my time. I mean I was lockdown when I was pregnant, but I just was so alone. Yeah, even though my sister was pregnant at the same time, so it's like I could literally it doesn't help when

Yeah, And I think a lot of a lot of my mental health during this time is how reliant I've had to become on Charlie, on you and Lucy as my business partners, like just having to.

Pick up slack, like you just feel like the shittest.

Person because you just cannot excel in any way, and then that it's like this vicious cycle of kind of self loathing and.

Yeah, it's awful, which then makes you just want to stay in bed and yeah, exactly. But then I've also a lot a toddler that's like once like, as you just said, it is something that everyone goes through, but it still is like you're experiencing it. You are excelling at growing human.

Yeah, well, thank god, that just kind of baby kicking along.

Just do do do pushing that pool out of the way, get out of here, mom, and it's please for goodness sake, have you been regularly seeing your therapist.

I missed my last appointment because I was in the hospital with DODR Matt.

Pretty legit excuse, but yeah, I've got to rebook that. Thank you for reminding me. Good because I know with you it definitely makes a difference. It does.

It's like a little you know what, she's my morphine.

If she will take that, she is your morphine. Complaint number nine the admin. Yeah, I am not an admin person, neither of I hate admin. The millions of appointments that you have to go to so irritating. I used to ask it was so long. My sister would be like, have you been to see meal wife? I was like no, She's like, why am I I don't want to? Then I have to drive.

There's a lot of time.

I just I could not be bothered. I hate admin. I hated the paperwork, and I hated that it was all on me. Look went to one ultrasound.

Yeah, that was the same with Childie because it was COVID, so it was really limited in what he could go to.

Still irritating, Oh don't mind me, I'll put off work for the morning because I've got to go get this baby scanned. Or I've got to go get this blood test. Oh they can't get blood. I've got to go get this irritating.

Yeah. I mean it's your first kind of taste of the inequities of raising kids, isn't it. Like first's the first mental load part of it, which as the woman or the primary kera. Unfortunately that does come down to.

You and then you generally are the one that thinks about everything that you need, like oh what pram, what cot what? Yeah, all of those little things Like you just don't realize how much admin there is involved. And it's irritating. Yeah, and time consuming, it is. It is.

It's very time consuming. I mean it consumes you as well.

You know the smells do you go on like how sensitive your nose is? Oh my god, yes, it's fucked.

I mean I have a sensitive nose to begin with, and I am supersonic. It's so bad that there have been times I've asked Charlie to.

Shower or.

Like remove a piece of clothing because there's a smell on it or something like. That's how crazy I've gotten with it.

Luke puts like cologne on to go to the gym. Oh yeah, yeah, it's so aggressive and it's such an like it's a beautiful smell. But now I hate it because he just wears it too often. He goes oily spread once. I'm like, it's too much. Yeah, it's spray half half when for special occasions not to go to the gym.

You know what would really be like like I would want to cry is when I got into like an uber and that fresh of things hanging there and I'm just like fucking yine.

But my nose never went back to what it was pre pregnancy. Like I used to have a really good like I loved fragrance, I loved perfumes. I did like a short course like yeah, and now I just most fragrances. I'm just like yuck too much. Definitely.

I found also like my allergies to do with scent have gotten really bad. Yes, So when I was pregnant. We're going to get to this a little bit later. And the complaints that I got from the shitter is, but my sinus is when I'm pregnant, like the inflammation in my my sinus means well, no, I get so blocked, right, and then sense really sent me off. So just that whole area, I feel like it's pretty fucked up from pregnancy,

Oh thank god, that wasn't my whole size all.

No, it's I mean, the lips do, but they always go back down. But the nose growing a whole size.

I don't know if maybe that is just an all wives tell No, it's not an old lives. Well, everyone gets a bit swollen, but it goes back down. Well, some people go back down, some people don't. Okay, if anyone's never went back down, please send us a photo only before and after, Yeah, before and after. All we can do is just do the nose like we want to share it. I just want to see if I just want to.

See it for the shells, might want to see.

Complaint number eleven. The vagina gets more vaginery, But you said that you think that maybe that's just because your scent is more heightened. When I say, I just want to say this because I don't want anyone at home thinking that they're alone in their vagina smelling more vaginery. I don't mean it in a bad way. No, I'm not saying it's a bad smell. It's just and more odorous and thicker smelling.

But can I say not once have I ever smelt one of my pregnant friends vaginas. That's why I think it is your sense of smell is heightened, And definitely I think you have a like a not you as in generalizations, we know our scent more than others, Like.

Vagina just smelled pretty much same, unless it's like got an infection.

I don't know, Like I just well, why haven't I smelled my pregnant friends.

I've smelt my friends sometimes when they've got periods.

Yeah, I think that's it's not blood, that's bloody. That's like a universal smell. I think everyone has like a slightly different sound, like different pheromones and things like that. But I don't want anyone to freak out because I don't think that other people are smelling yourself.

So ry. I never ever thought, my gosh, that pregnant friend has got a smelly vagina, like an odorous, odorous, odorous smelly makes it sounds bad. It's just odorous. Yeah. Yeah. It also gets puffy. Everything gets puffy. But it's funny when your vagina gets puffy, A puffy muffy. Yeah.

I didn't get that the first time around, but you bet you.

My puss is so puffy right now. I got a puffy puss When we were in your pokey, like is.

It yeah, phaps are just bulbous, like what's happening.

It looked like looks like there.

Was something I was packing heat. That's what it looked like in Europe. And I was just like, and then the bump's covering it. So I'm just like trying to see over the bump and I'm like, oh, yeah, you're look in the.

Mirror and you go, dear lord, I've got two big sausages.

Also, the throbbing, because of the reason Robby muffy is because there's a lot of blood rushing to that area and the throbbing from it. It was just so weird, so weird, so weird. Actually, that's just reminded me of one I didn't have on the list, which I've never spoken about.

Admit it. The orgasms I have when I'm pregnant. I was gonna I was thinking it, but you've said it. I didn't have that, But tell me about it, because some people get like really horny when they're pregnant. Yeah, it's weird.

Like I was just orgasm in my sleep all the time and have constant orgasms through the night. It's very strange.

But it's a thing. What do you mean, I don't So you're lying in bed having like.

It's like my vagina is so much more sensitive and tender because it's fatter.

Maybe that's wine. Maybe because your clip's gotten puffy or too. It just drops on the flap a little bit and you just orgasm in your slick.

I don't know, but I'll like often wake up from it and I'll be like oh oh, or I'll be out and it's just a little bit.

Like oh tingly yeah, and I'm just like, oh, this is what have you? Oh my god, You're turning into one of those patients that it's on Gray's amatom where they just have like involuntary orgasms. Yeah, yeah, that's you.

Well, I'm not having involuntary ones when I'm like out and about better. But it's like tingly. I mean, they're no different, They're just kind of the same as if you were.

Are you having more orgasms when you have sex?

Well, I haven't been having sex because this pregnancy has not been great for me. Also, like and if I'm getting i'm getting off, I'm asleep by myself.

Yeah, actually got no knee, but yeah, it.

Is very strange. And I got this germ first pregnancy, so it is like it is.

Because you've got one good thing both pregnancies.

It is just a bit weird though, because then you're just like, why am I such a sicko? Like, no, there's no sick there's no wrong, nothing wrong with it. But I'm just like, how many orgasms this one need to have?

Well, apparently a lot. It's maybe it's trying to help you with the poo.

Yeah, probably complain number twelve.

Boobs so tender and not in a good way. I think some people might get it in a but I remember, like I had to put my hands on my nipples when I was under the shower because just the feeling of the water on my nipples was burning.

That's how I knew I was pregnant the first time, because I had this weird feeling sensation on my nipples that I'd never felt before, just from water hitting my nipples. And I'm like, I've never even felt my nipples feel anything.

You know some people in nipple people, I'm I just would rather mind, Like honestly, sometimes you could be playing with them and I'd be like, oh, like, I'm not a nipple person, so it's weird. I just wanted them cover it.

Yeah, I so so tender and so big, so quick.

It's just like they do go back down to their original size though. I always wondered that.

A little bit less. So I'd say, a man are a little bit like.

A sad flute. Mine exactly the same. I know, I'm so dealous. I did pay for them though, but even the nip like just perfect.

Well, when I'm pregnant, my actual nipples are really long.

Oh my god, You're like Ashley, it's so weird.

So I'm constantly hyping me and it's not.

You turn into an actual calend. It's t t but they do go back. How funny is it when you've got your tits in the milk machine. You know, I know what it's like, and it goes and you look at it and it's literally like an udder being milked. It's so weird. We are, honestly being a woman. We just take it all. Okay, so key, you asked the shitters about some additional complaints.

I thought i'd just run through them because honestly, the reason I did this is because there were a few in here that I went, oh my god, I had that. I didn't realize it was a pregnancy symptom. So if you're pregnant or I have been pregnant before, you might be like, aha, it might help you. Yeah, I'm just going to run through then we won't need to like talk too much about it. Carple Tunnel, I had this well.

Until last night when you messaged me about this. I didn't realize that was a pregnancy thing. I have had it on other points, to be fair.

Yeah, Like I think it's like a pretty normal thing to get it. It's an office job.

And do like a lot of typing. It's a huge symptom of vitamin B twelve deficiency.

Right, okay, doc, and the arm brace that goes with it. Oh, I never had to shout out to sleeping and arm braces because you've got fucked up pains and your wrists and hands horrific diarrhea. I didn't get that, but.

That happened to me post birth. I would be literally breastfeeding on the toilet with my newborn way. Well, shit was just coming out of me like lava for six weeks. Got a great visual. Just say the tongue. Have you heard of that? No? What is that? Okay?

So, a geographic tongue is an inflammatory but harmless condition affecting the surface of the tongue. So basically the tongue ends up with these kind of like smooth red patches on the top or the side of the tongue. The reason why the little geographic tongue is because they make like quite interesting shapes. I'm just showing you. Oh imagine if your tongue just look like that for no reason.

I don't like that. It's so random. Pregnancy is so so weird.

Why do these things?

Bad things happen to good people. We're growing and all this weird stuff needs to happen, you know.

I agree?

I agree. Lightning crotch, you had that, Oh my god, I did super.

Sharp pains down there, and you've had jo sick and sometimes it can start really early on and not stop.

And it just happens in the most weird place and you do that.

Oh yeah, yeah, my tiny, I believe you had these two swollen ankles.

Okay, I just have perpetually swollen ankles. I was right there with you. My girlfriends call me leg foot because I just don't have an ankle. It just goes leg to foot. What about my girlfriend Bell, We need to post a photo if she lets us how swollen she got all over.

Could everyone maybe send us their swollen and equal or just yeah, yeah. We won't do any headshots, but we just put all together make.

Other people feel better a chuckle bit, I off a chuckle make everyone feel better about getting so swollen. It's just the water retention. Every time we saw her afterwards, we were like, oh, she's deflated some more. It was like, she's just literally just me block sinuses.

I was so glad when someone else said this, I was like, yes, it's not just me random calf cramps and like being woken up by cramping legs. This is so bad, so bad, I forgot Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, terrible, so fucking painful.

I thought about this one too. Skin tags. Did you get these?

No?

I have heard about them.

Yeah, I did get some skin tags, and I was.

Like, I'm a psycho, though I would just I have gotten one before, not in pregnancy. I just chopped it off. You're not supposed to think. Yep, dry eyes.

I did get this in my first pregnancy, and my eyes got really dry and I remember I had to use drops a lot. Oh, really gross pigmentation.

Of course, it's a big one for lots of women. Yeah, rib pain.

Rib pain is the first sign that I'm pregnant, and it is so annoying, and you're just constantly kind of like ow ow ow because your ribs are probably moving you exactly for your womb a. Loss of fitness, even if you continue to work out, can't relate. Haven't worked out a day in this pregnancy.

I feel like most people I know cannot. Like that is for the five percent of the population who are super fit.

Yeah.

Acne.

Now I didn't get this, but bacne is a big thing with some people with their pregnancies. They just get like this crazy breaking skin, really bad skin, and everyone's like, where's my glowy pregnant and then.

They say, oh, it's a girl because she's taking your beauty. Oh, well that's sexist.

Well yeah, but also the people that I've known that's happened to did have a girl.

Really, yes, it's weird.

I mean, you know this is one that you and I already hate. Varracos veins. Oh, they get worse, they get bigger, bigger hate of Okay, this was another one I had to look up. Obstetric collis stace status. I'm sorry whoever's listening being like, can you learn some words? So basically, it's when your the skin on your stomach or your body.

Itchy, gets really really itchy.

I forgot about Yeah, itchy skin. Yeah, well the itchy skin I think is at all generalizing which is safe. But obstetric colostatsus is actually.

A liver issue.

So if you get really itchy on your tummy, you need to see your GP because so they can run a blood test because you could have this liver thing, Like what is it.

Is because your skin was stretching.

No, so per kid spot coleo stasis of pregnancy is a rare liver disorder. Only about one percent of the population will be effected. But it's important to know the signs and symptoms. So yeah, it's actually a condition that some people get. So it's your skin generally means your skin is stretching, but like severe itchiness can be a sign of this, like random liver thing that is only present when you're pregnant.

God shout out to the chicks dealing with that. This one blew my mind.

Waking in the night with burning hot feet, had to get under a shower to cool them down.

That sounds awful, awful, awful. This one.

I forgot that I had this, and I had no idea at the time. Planter facitis. It's intense heel pain. I got this towards the end of my pregnancy, and you would.

Have just assumed that your feet were sore because of the extra weight.

Totally just add it to the list of things. Yeah, I didn't realize it's an actual thing. This one was pretty funny. Smell a versions to partner, just the general scent.

I love it. I love that they're like everything annoyed me, including their scent. I loved it.

Tender nightis and claw hands.

That sounds awful. That sounds really painful.

One of our shit has developed a neck hump, which is awful. Well, I don't know, maybe I didn't get into the details. It was just a tiny box. It's only you know, gives.

Like really detailed descriptions of everything.

Yeah, exactly, metallic tastes of mouth. I had this often hairy belly.

Yeah, I used to love shaving mine.

Hairy nipples. Oh, I didn't get that.

Always I have to pluck them.

Oh, I don't think that's the one place here doesn't grow on my thanks so much. Pery oral dermatite.

That's just a really bad form of dermatitis. Very common, very easy to treat. Actually, is it a treat?

Annoying that you get it with pregnancy? GD We touched on dry vadge. Oh so so business while you're pregnant. I get it. Well, at least you've got an excuse black armpits, neck and puss. Like I've heard that skin darkens, it's like pigmentation and like specific places.

Would that be for different people from different races?

Well, this person was white that sent it through, But I think it can honestly be all different skin types. Oh, I just get that line, you know, that weird line everyone gets.

But like imagine like a really white person raising their arm and they've got like a black pitch. Yeah.

I think that's what this should have had.

I want photographs of these things. Yeah, and I should have said it attached photo the hemorrhoids.

I haven't had those yet, but you know what, I think, if this any pregnancy, that I'm going to get them and be this one. I have been straining like a mofo. Yes, but they are bad, aren't they? Like people really get them badly.

It's awful. Ashley has to still push hers back up inside her butt. I don't know if she wants us to blast that for Oh. I'm sure she tells everyone about the Hemsworths hemorrhoids Hemsworths. I hope she does. Anyway, Now she'll be fine.

That's all we've got time for today. It's been a little bit last do you.

After having a nice, good old question, I love a complain.

And again just to say, obviously we know that huge privilege, huge privilege, bring still to winge about things still okay? In fact, it's a bloody service that we are doing carrying these children and.

We's of pregnancy symptoms. Key ended up in the hospital full of Pooh.

Yeah, thanks for the reminder again.

Can we drink every time Kelly says Key did a pool or make a show of colosule? That's right. If you love this.

Episode, might she shared it on your socials or share it with a friend who also needs a bit of a winge about being up the duff or having been with a child. You can tag us at Key Reese and at Kelly Underscore, McCarran and eessr dot Pod.

This episode was produced by myself, Kelly McCarran and Key Resells, with audio production by Mattie Joannu. See you next week.

Shit is Bye.