Renee opens up to Janna about her six-year marriage to her white husband, exploring the intricacies of their age and ethnicity differences that created a soupy mix of misunderstandings around sexual desire, and her feelings of low libido. Renee, a biracial woman, brings a compassionate and curious lens to her experiences and exploration of black culture, shedding light on the pervasive hypersexualized messages that saturate the music and language, contributing to a perfect storm of toxic masculi...
Jan 09, 2024•55 min
From the early stages of her life, Rowen discovered immense fulfillment in the roles of people-pleasing and caretaking for those around her. However, she later realized that the price she paid for these roles was steep—it left her clueless about her own wants and needs. As this pattern extended into her intimate relationship with her husband, her inability to assert herself resulted in exclusive attention to his needs, leaving her feeling alone and broken in her lack of desire for intimacy. Desp...
Jan 02, 2024•50 min
Kate and Janna unravel the complex dynamics of Kate’s 19-year marriage marked by a common tradition – the recurrent gift of lingerie. Although intended as a sweet gesture, these presents took a toll on Kate, leaving her feeling embarrassed and awkward, along with dwindling her libido and decreasing her desire for sex. As the duo discusses the cultural implications of gifting lingerie, Kate's story becomes a powerful testament to self-empowerment, shedding light on how societal norms can hinder a...
Dec 26, 2023•44 min
Throughout their 17 year union, the presence of pornography cast a shadow over Sandra and her husband’s relationship, steadily eroding its foundation. Initially, Sandra dismissed it, swayed by the notion that incorporating porn could add a spark to their connection. However, as time unfolded, she witnessed alarming shifts in her husband's behavior—his inability to heed her pleas for gentleness, defensiveness clouding his responses, emotions spiraling into dramatic extremes, an inability to disti...
Dec 19, 2023•48 min
When Lee initially encountered Janna's messages about sex on her podcast, he felt victimized. It seemed to him as though blame for bad sex in marriage was being cast solely on men, leading him to internalize it as his personal responsibility. However, with time, he gradually grasped the profound message she aimed to convey – that the distorted notions about sex ingrained in our society are a product of our culture. Both he and his wife of 19 years were unwittingly influenced by these societal na...
Dec 12, 2023•42 min
Elle believed she was grappling with low libido as she reached the age of 50, having been married for 25 years with three children in college. Intimacy in her relationship had become a burdensome task, postponed for weeks at a time until guilt finally compelled her to engage. She considered this ebb in desire as a typical aspect of this stage in life. It wasn't until Janna helped Elle compassionately delve into her personal history that the true roots of her low sex drive emerged. Unearthing chi...
Dec 05, 2023•46 min
Janna dives into a question she receives often from women looking into her Wanting It More program: "Will this work for me if I don't feel anything during sex?" A powerful misconception exists in our culture that something is wrong with a woman if she doesn't experience intense sensations during intercourse. Many of these women are labeled with “low libido” or “low sex drive.” Janna challenges the notion that sex is primarily focused on penetration, emphasizing the importance of understanding th...
Nov 28, 2023•16 min
Everyone talks about getting more rest, but what does it truly mean to rest? Is it just about lying still and doing nothing? Join Janna and her good friend, Dr. Laura Froyen, as they dive into the world of rest in this delightful conversation. They explore various types of rest – physical, emotional, mental, social, spiritual, sensory, and creative – unraveling the true essence of what rest aims to achieve. They recall rest experiences that can be not only rejuvenating and enlivening but also su...
Nov 14, 2023•52 min
Ellen bravely opens up about her journey with Vaginismus, a condition she discovered on her wedding night when she and her husband tried to have intercourse for the first time. A moment that should have been filled with joy and excitement left Ellen feeling gutted and cheated, particularly because she and her husband had eagerly waited until marriage to share this experience. Vaginismus is a complex and often misunderstood medical condition that causes the muscles of the vagina to involuntarily ...
Nov 07, 2023•48 min
Janna talks to the author of one of her most recommended books, "Sex, God, & the Conservative Church – Erasing Shame from Sexual Intimacy." In this captivating conversation with Dr. Tina Schermer Seller, a licensed therapist specializing in sex and gender issues, they discuss her research of the Christian Conservative church and the rise of abstinence-only education and purity culture in the early 1980s. This shift has had serious negative effects on both women and men, impacting their abili...
Oct 31, 2023•57 min
The dream of having a family can quickly darken in the face of fertility issues. Sex suddenly becomes a highly monitored business, filled with immense pressure and crushing timelines. 33 year-old Bridget endured three tumultuous years of IVF treatments, invasive medical procedures, severe sickness, and the trauma of pregnancy losses, all while living through the stress and isolation of Covid. The experience left her feeling utterly broken, both physically and mentally, and traumatized with...
Oct 24, 2023•57 min
When asked, "What do you like to do for pleasure?", Crissie’s response was, "That's a hard question for me.” Many women will relate to Crissie’s do-everything-for-everyone-except-myself mentality. This 40-year-old mother of four spent years consumed with providing for the needs of her young family. Figuring out her own needs, wants and enjoyments were at the very bottom of her to-do list, especially when it came to intimacy with her husband. Taking WIM gave Crissie space to ask herself for the f...
Oct 17, 2023•55 min
If you've ever dealt with painful or uncomfortable sex, this episode is a must listen. For years, Anna tolerated the trauma of painful intercourse. She describes the pain as feeling like rug burn for hours afterward. She was eventually diagnosed with vaginismus. Although she found pelvic floor therapy helpful, she didn't feel understood by her therapist and was left feeling even more sexually broken. Her sexual experiences were shadowed in anxiety, fear, shame, and guilt. Her experience in Wanti...
Oct 10, 2023•55 min
Alyssa is a 31-year-old high school educator who’s been married to her high school sweetheart for 9 years. When she became sexually active in high school, she was terrified of pregnancy. Even though she was using birth control, she was so anxious for weeks afterward that it was hard to function. Once she was married and decided to start a family, Alyssa experienced two back-to- back miscarriages. Although she was told by the medical professionals treating her that this experience was routine and...
Oct 03, 2023•57 min
On the final day of our latest Wanting It More round, I gathered all the wonderful husbands and wives together for a warm farewell Zoom call. During this heartwarming session, I posed the question, "What's been your most significant takeaway from this journey?" Their honest responses moved me to tears. At just eight weeks into their Wanting It More adventure, these couples have already made remarkable strides in rekindling their intimacy. While this path isn't without its challenges, witne...
Sep 26, 2023•43 min
I'm answering the most frequent questions I get about my online program, Wanting It More, which is now open for registration for the Oct./Nov. round. I think it’s THE best online program out there for helping women with low libido want and enjoy sex more, while also supporting their husbands so they can create a nourishing, fun, connecting sex life as a team with nobody being blamed other than culture. In this episode I'll answer: - What resources are included? What’s the weekly schedule? What’s...
Sep 19, 2023•36 min
Everything Stuart learned about sex was from what he saw in media. Therefore, he understood sex to be a passionate, dramatic, climatic, sweaty event that occurs frequently and is mind blowing every time. Not surprisingly, this is not the type of sex life that Stuart had in his 12 year marriage. In this extremely honest conversation with Janna, Stuart describes the slow decline of sex in his marriage, the round and round conversations with his wife that went nowhere, and how they both felt guilty...
Sep 12, 2023•1 hr 8 min
Helen’s biggest realization during Wanting It More was owning the fact that she wasn’t taking responsibility for her own pleasure. Her lack of enjoyment in the sexual experience wasn’t all about her husband and what he was or wasn’t doing for her. She was allowing things to happen in the bedroom that she didn’t enjoy that created feelings of boredom, frustration, annoyance, even pain, but she didn’t know what to do when something didn’t feel good anymore (or never felt good in the first place). ...
Sep 05, 2023•1 hr 1 min
Jenn grew up in a conservative Christian household and received her sex education from church events and camps (based on purity culture with the message that sex before marriage is a HUGE sin) and her high school sex ed class (which left her terrified of pregnancy and STDs). Not surprisingly, this education left her with a lot of shame around sex and her sexual interest in general. Married for seven years, the shame spiral continued with her husband and she felt confused and broken…until W...
Aug 29, 2023•50 min
There's a big promise out there that we often hear in our culture...if you wait until marriage to have sex it will be the most united and amazing experience of your life! Yet, for many couples, the opposite tends to be true. Sex can feel awkward, weird, and unsatisfying. The lesson from youth that sex is bad is hard to suddenly shake once "I do" is said. The same feelings of shame and guilt around sex follow us into marriage and don't go away. This was Derek's experience, a devout Catholic who s...
Aug 22, 2023•58 min
Do you have a hard time saying no to your husband's sexual advances for fear of hurting his feelings? So many women I teach say they feel internal pressure and duty to give in and get it over with when it comes to sex with their husband. No wonder so many women aren’t enjoying the sexual experience! Here’s what took me a long time to figure out: saying “no” empowers you to say “yes” to the things you actually enjoy (even if you don’t know what that is yet). Listen to my conversation with 4...
Aug 15, 2023•1 hr
Struggling to find the importance of sex in marriage after 60? I’m talking to Diane, a teacher and musician in her sixties with three grown children. Despite being an educator, Diane admits to knowing nothing about sexual relationships in her youth and “assuming the guys knew what they were doing.” In this incredibly tender and inspiring episode, we talk about her journey with duty sex for almost 33 years in her marriage and the courageous steps she and her husband have taken to start talking ab...
Aug 01, 2023•49 min
Today we’re talking about foreplay and why I don’t think more foreplay, typically prescribed to women with low libido, is the answer to enjoying sex more. I believe it does more harm to women than good. Curious to know why? Listen in as I discuss three reasons why the goal to increase sexual arousal through foreplay is problematic. I also offer tips on what to try instead to help you focus on what your mind and body actually need to authentically enjoy the sexual experience with your husband. Ja...
Jul 25, 2023•14 min
This episode is for the men listening out there! I often get emails from husbands asking me for advice on what they can do to help their wife enjoy sex more. Maybe they’ve listened to my podcast or read my website, so these men already understand it’s not about labelling her with “low libido” or getting her to fix herself. They understand there is a much larger societal issue behind her lack of desire, but they have no idea how to approach her with this information. I’m offering valuable advice ...
Jul 18, 2023•18 min
Have you heard the advice to "spice things up" to keep your sex life alive? Get kinky, say dirty words, try new positions, watch porn. I tried all of these things and more in my marriage to increase my low sex drive but I was left feeling empty, unsatisfied and unaligned with myself. I believe the key to more connected intimacy is becoming more of who you are in the sexual experience, not pretending to be someone you aren't. In this episode, I discuss why chasing increased physical sensat...
Jul 11, 2023•12 min
For the first time, I'm offering support to husbands in my Wanting It More program, and I'm learning a lot about why men find it hard to understand (and even believe) their wife's low desire for sex compared to their own. This is especially true when women haven't been honest about what they enjoy (and especially about what they don't enjoy) in the bedroom. In this episode, I'm sharing real examples of what men say they’re learning about how their wife's sexual desire works and how using these n...
Jul 04, 2023•56 min
The examples we're shown of sex in movies and tv are ridiculous! I'm here to tell you that's not what real sex looks or sounds like (these are actors acting after all). Are you curious to know what connected sex actually looks like? In my Wanting It More program, I get vulnerable and share my own sexual experience with my program participants to help them understand a new way of conducting an intimate experience based on their specific needs. I mean, where else are you going to learn this stuff?...
Jun 27, 2023•28 min
We're missing out on true joy and connection with our partners and ourselves when we focus on the formulaic goals of sex. It's not all about orgasm! It's about getting curious to create and follow your own rules for your sexual wellness. Laura and I chat about some of my best tips for creating a non-goal-oriented and mindful sexual connection. Janna's new Wanting It More Foundations self-paced course for women is open for registration. The next round of Doing It Together runs June/July 202...
Jun 20, 2023•57 min
I challenge a lot of what society teaches men and women about sex, and sometimes husbands have a hard time with my content. I've been bullied, threatened, and personally attacked online by men who are struggling to see their important role in helping their wives feel more comfortable in the bedroom. That's why I was pleasantly surprised when Charles reached out to me on Instagram to share how the podcast was helping him in his relationship with his wife (without her involvement in my prog...
Jun 13, 2023•43 min
Partner betrayal is SO complex compared to other forms of trauma. The lying, manipulation, scapegoating and gaslighting create a cycle of shame of wanting to simultaneously connect and disconnect from a cheating partner. My husband of 14 years admitted to a porn addiction that I was unaware of (after years in therapy/coaching trying to fix my "low libido"). When I came across the work of Michelle Mays on YouTube after one late night of desperate Googling, I knew I had to have her on ...
Jun 06, 2023•56 min
