S4 - Ep. 50 - Gil Ozeri Pt. 2

Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?

Either way, we want to be there.

Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us time and a terminol and gay.

We want to send you off InStyle.

We wanna welcome you back home.

Tell us all about it.

We scared her? Was it fine? Malborn? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do your need ride? Ride with Karen and Chris?

Okay, we grew up with Foster's Freeze. That was the place. There was one in town, so that was.

Like our one of our They were in Burbank, right, there's one in Burbank.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think it's right up on Yeah here.

It's like a red brush script font.

Is that a procreate joke?

If if they'd let us have fonts in there? Am I right now? That's a pro create joke. It's hard to get there. You can import them.

Uh, you guys wouldn't get it? Yeah, yeah, sorry.

I tend to talk about people's heads whenever I can.

If this one in Burbank is what we're thinking, is do they because I know there's one on San Fernando, does.

That have a drive through?

I can help out. Let me help out.

It would be great.

Google it. And as you do that, I'm gonna just ask you a couple of questions. A question, qu Christian question, Christian quit some Christians for my research?

Is it true?

Gil?

Yes that you uh?

Because this is horrifying to me, Uh, that you were locked in a plastic storage tub had happy endings like locked.

In a plastic storage tub. That sounds familiar to me.

Like I'm I'm maybe I'm calling it the wrong thing.

Okay, that happy ending THEO you're saying, Yeah, it sounds very familiar to me.

Okay, don't that's the problem with doing think it?

Was it Jackie Clark was John Q Internet, John Q Internet.

Okay, all right, it looks like it.

Does have a through.

Oh sweet, Oh, I love this.

Foster's Freeze as a solve for our drive through problem is so exciting.

Yeah, And you know, people get so understandably, they don't want us to hear. They don't want to hear eating of donuts, so anything of anything but drinking everyone's favorite SMR. They love the slashing and kissing noises.

It says drive through too on my thing too.

We're doing it and I will help with these lefts and rights that I always assume you can handle on your own.

I'm sorry I couldn't verify the It's okay. I just found from I have put myself in a storage bin before.

I am so scared, like in my youth, you dares to crawl into a washer or dryer, get into anything that I feel could lock on the inside. And I know there's tupperware. Storage bins do lock, and you could. I mean, it's just one of my claustrophobic fears.

Yeah, yeah, was the story you heard that Gil got stuck like he got put into one and then they couldn't get him back out.

Well I didn't. Yeah, that's where I was hoping details would bail me out. No, No, I do not apologize for an experience.

It is pretty crazy that I can't remember if it happened, you remember, I would it was.

It was unhappy ending. So there's glimmer. I think the trauma has caused you to bury it.

It's possible.

It's also like I don't know, I did so many stupid things and Franks at that show.

It was very early in my I was like the first.

Season, I was a writer's assistant there, and I was a terrible one. I was just, you know, not making jokes and you know, being silly and stupid. So I feel like it makes sense, but I can't verify any details.

And as a writer's assistant that I've never had a real writing job, making jokes would be frowned upon.

No, well it was it.

It was like I was never I was supposed to take notes, never took notes, so supposed to use final draft, didn't know how to do yeah, word all day. Yes, I mean, it wasn't that I was making jokes. It was like, at the expense of everything else that was supposed to be properly.

That's the best. Well, then they must have really liked you.

They liked me enough to hire me as a writer in the next season, but because they knew. I think it was partially because they knew I was so bad at being a writer's assistant.

Yeah, it's a hard job.

It is. It's a really tough job.

It's like when anytime I've seen people do it, I'm like, it blows my mind that this they're trying to make this the entry into this since what you're doing like I could not be a writer's assistant, even though I've written on TV.

Yeah, I couldn't do it.

Because of the authority thing that you can't tell me what, you can't tell me what to type.

I won't do.

I mean, part of the job feels like you're a teacher in a way where like the kids get to play and you just have to pay attention to do anything stupid and you.

Have to write down everything, everything, especially what is not acknowledged to be like the pick, because politically maybe you can't.

Yes, you know what you're running down is also not good.

Yes, yes, okay, I guess I'll write down this, you know, idea about an ant driving a car.

You know, you can't as the writer's assistant make a face or be like should we leave this one out?

Like you just have to.

Be the and then you got to stay like an hour later to compile stuff after they leave, all.

That scripting, like putting it into script form.

That's funny because any the handful of jobs I have had, the person that was doing that, you know, wrangling everyone else's ideas and formatting it, I always thought, oh, that person's in charge, right right, Yeah, they.

Probably know they kind of they kind of are though. Yeah, that's like the genius. Maybe that's true. That kind of teaching.

Is it like your secret Yeah yeah yeah, yeah, so the.

Hard parts you do this now and then you'll earn the slightly easier part of thinking of ideas.

Yeah, if everyone's joking and one person is quiet and taking notes, it's safe to assume they're in charge.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Were you in at the ground floor with like the development of big mouth A big mouth?

No.

I joined in season one in the middle of the season, so season episode four, I think of season one okay, so good, and you were palace with Nick and yeah, I knew Nick from New York sort of coming up in the sure you know, he was more stand up and I was more improv Yeah, but we uh crossed each other's paths.

As a bunch.

And and then yeah, I had a lot of good puberty stories and right, you know, a terrible experience which helped out on the show.

That's great.

That's where it all pays off.

That's where it pays off, exactly.

That's great.

Having a dad who makes you read well your friends are over pays off.

Right, Yeah, trauma's the best knocking.

Guys, I'm just gonna step in here really quick. Stop the fun. Okay, no, no, I'm you're doing my dad?

Yeah no, no, see I was triggered right there.

I was just like, okay, dad, whatever you're doing myself?

Yeah you were really yes, sah, don't get me and trauma.

Yeah, when did you move here? Then?

I moved here in twenty eleven at the start of Happy Endings. Actually, so as soon as I got hired, it brought me out here.

Oh wow, yeah, so this is your home now.

This is my home? Is my home? That's right. I mean, I guess, I guess I can consider LA.

I know it took me twenty years and then I finally faced it.

How do you feel about the city right now?

I yeah, I can't. I mean, I go back. I'm from Montana, Okay, I go back, and I'm like, okay, I don't know that. I know I would have had a different life. But when I do go to New York, there is a a and I've talked about it on this podcast. I feel like maybe I should have moved here, just as how I feel while I'm there doing multiple shows and my jokes get all worked out.

Like you feel more at home.

No, it's a home I never had where I'm like developing stand up quickly and doing three shows at night. That's hard to do here. And I love out my interactions in New York, where people are like, it doesn't have this reputation for being as friendly as it is, or that's been my experiences, people asking you about your day rather than people here. It seems like people tell you about their day.

Yeah, that makes sense. They sort of wear their IMDb resume on their sure.

Yeah yeah, whereas no one gives a ship about that.

Yeah. Well, it's like it's so industry favored here. It's just like it's hard to find people who are like, not part of it, right, you know, have normal lives.

I guess, yes, yeah, I guess. The simple answer is there are parts of parts of it that you like that I do like, yes, but the part you just mentioned I could sometimes.

Do without totally.

Yeah, but I do. I do love it. I mean, come on, it's beautiful here.

Yeah, yes, I mean it's gorgeous.

Yes, look at us, look.

At us going to Foster's Freeze, look at this place beautiful?

Oh wow, boy? Was I wrong about that font?

Okay, Reese's Twister. Oh my god, look at those shakes.

Is it's the first ever frost Ors freezes?

I don't know. There's a few of them in this area. I think there's one deeper into Glendale.

I think I'm excited. It's going to be worth the lamp in my right foot. Oh oh, I'm excited.

Oh wow, the window is very low.

Yeah, okay, anything you.

Want gil anything under four dollars.

I'll take a chili cheese.

No, and I point to the sign that says beverages only.

I'm getting a twister or food?

Yes?

What's a twister?

Is that just like a shake with candy in it?

Oh? Really? Oh, I'll do that. Oh here, look, I'm gonna make mine easy. I'll get whatever you get.

Just okay?

Am I putting too much pressure on you?

Well we'll see.

Okay, I will complain about it.

After I get then, Yes, okay, you know what you want.

I'm I'm just adjusting. I'm there's local favorites.

The dipped ice cream is really good too, Should I do that? The dip like a hard yeah? Hard chocolate like okay.

Yeah, it's been a while since I had a shell.

Do you want that?

Yep.

On Lise, Oh, I would love a chocolate shake. Yeah, just playing chocolate shake.

Yeah.

I know it's kind of boring, you know.

I like that. I like that just so you feel better.

On a Lise, I do believe I want a vanilla shaken.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, both.

This is everybody's birthday present this year, so now there's also fresh lemonade.

Can I ask if they have any mistakes or is that just the dairy queen by my youthful.

House, like they put mistakes aside.

I swear that for me, they would take an upside down ice cream cone and put it in a cop like it was a mishap that happened. And then when little kids come and ask do you have any mistakes? They would give you a free.

Oh really yeah, isn't that sweet?

Yes?

Yeah, yeah that was I think.

Oh, look at those flavors. I think I'm gonna get Snickers are a Reese's cup?

I'll take asis, I'll take Okay.

Well too, Oh I can't I look at those I gotta get. I gotta do something else. I think I'm gonna get a pineapple small shake. Wow. Yeah, yeah, I'm all over the place.

On Elise still vanilla. I think I'm gonna stick with my Chocolate'm gonna stick with my chocolate.

Chocolate.

It's first on the list. But can you see it through that tip jar? That should be more full? Strawberry?

We got triple half of the flavors, but.

We got hot fudge. We got banana on a lease, we got caramel peach. You never think peach with shakes, Cherry Bill my.

Mouth as what this is like a summer celebration, right.

Yeah, I hope if you ask for a peach they pull an alarm and they're like, well, somebody's doing it in a decade.

We overhear someone yelled, no, he's not elderly.

There.

Oh god, I'm very excited.

Is there someone in there? Do you see someone in there?

Let's do I know it doesn't apply to any of us, but let's inquire about the senior discount. It seems like a place that would honor.

We are ordering a peach shake, so we should get.

It well, since the other was such a home run in my other research, and I.

Hope I know none of these things.

No, it's I just want us to have more in common. It said you used to sneak into UCB shows a lot. Oh, yes, and I did. Yeah, and I got in trouble once doing that. You did? I got actually very curtly written email. That's and I had performed on shows okay, this is at U s here in l A L. And they they they said I couldn't do that, and they did it. Yeah. Yeah, it was like I was in trouble because I got I was kind of, what.

Are some milkshakes and stuff? Can we get small?

Right?

Yes?

Can we get a small too small? Reese's Twisters? And then a small chocolate shake?

You're still going with pineapples? I am, and a small pineapple shake?

Yes?

I rule?

Ice cream does turn you into a kid?

Yeah, yeah, really, I'm very Yeah, I can't. I think it is weird though, if I think about I'm not on any stand up shows at us BE and I just show up to watch a show and just walk in and sit down. I think now that I'm thinking about it, maybe I knew.

I mean, I feel like.

I also got like some side eye many times, but I was just like, I don't care.

Leave me alone.

Is it sad for you?

They would do it?

Those use those ucbs aren't around anymore, right.

There's one on Franklin. Still.

Yeah, I mean it's it's always sad when something sort of goes away that you were, you know, involved in heavily.

Yeah, but you know everything must die.

Yes, yes, yes, it's true.

I'm dropping.

Yeah, I've been. It's been a secret I've been taking. Yes, Karen, we don't live forever.

Okay, no one told me, no one.

Karen doesn't know about mortality yet.

I mean I don't.

I don't believe perform. I perform improv now like once a month or once every couple of months, so that's more my speed. I when I like, when I was at UCBO doing it like seven nights a week, so it was like, you know, I felt a deeper connection, and now it's sort of like that was a time in my life.

I guess.

But wait, sorry, can I ask you?

I'm doing it seven nights a week, and then you went it you snuck in to go see a show, and I.

Was prior to that. I would speak in prior.

God, Yeah, yeah, mine was early. No one knew me yet. Night shouldn't have been so cavalier. Yeah, got it. Do you get nervous now? You do it less often?

When I don't. Weirdly, I don't. I know people who who that happens to, you know who? They suddenly sort of I guess, calcify a little bit, but like it's it's still like fun for me and I like it and good.

You know, do you think you don't get nervous because your dad used to make you stop playing a green?

I'm constantly yes, I'm imagining my dad getting mad at me if I get nervous on when I'm on stage, right, and then when I do a bad scene, I go to the corner and I read a book.

Yeah, right, and you make everyone else be quiet?

Everyone else quiet?

Wait, I'm looking. Also, there's another drive through we can do.

Should you guys know? This is drive through corner?

They have.

You there's a Banana Republic over.

There drive through and one ways.

And that kind of caramel colored sweater. Yeah, I don't care. I don't care how it's cut.

Yes, And then.

We've solved a lot of problems today with these two. Adding these to our lists because there's strangely very few drive through drive through especially for coffee places, where it's just like okay, well we'll make that switch.

Is there a coffee bean and t you leave drive through of course.

There no, not no, there is elusive as the Sonics. You have to go outside of town.

All the way to Monroevia.

Yeah. Wow.

Do you do.

Improv often at Largo?

I do it at Largo now yeah.

Yeah that still do ascats sometimes here and there, but Largo I do a show with do you know Ben Schwartz?

Sure?

So yeah.

Ben Schwartz has like a show that he does, Ben Schwartz and Friends. And he'll have me on and you know, here and there and it's like enough for me now too, I'm like rat to kids, and like getting out of the house to do it is kind of tough.

Yeah, I know that Ben Schwartz and Friends is like a monthly if not more.

Right, Yeah, pretty much.

I mean he now goes on tour, so he's like all over the country, so he does it a little bit less.

But yeah.

He had a show at the Beacon Theater in New York last month and I got to do that and that was fun.

Yeah.

Yeah, I guess that if every time I was performing. Yeah, no, I get very nervous at Largo.

Actually, I feel like I had what is it about Largo? Oh my god? Thank you so much.

I thought I was about to say I get comforted knowing that the audience is always good there, But no, I still get nervous in my mind. I fear that, even though I've done that over twenty years, I worry that, Yeah, that'd be great. Thank you bomb. For some reason, I hear that because my damn dad was so damn supportive.

Thank you. Wow. Wow, Oh my god, this is exciting.

I'm very excited.

This is incredible, by the way.

Okay, ready for the reactions listeners. Guys, I'm sipping.

Listeners. You can't see this, but I just wet my pants.

Because of the level of reasons.

This is a sip of a pineapple shake.

Holy moly, this is a little meal. This is serious business.

Yeah, I'm sorry. You have to drive. Can you put it in automated driving?

Yeah, there's a milkshake mode.

Oh oh man, I'm in the right decision. Yeah there is chunks of pineapple in this thing.

Wow. Is that a good thing?

Oh? Yeah, I'm sorry, but this is going straight.

To my feet. The volume is going on. You just scared an old man on the street.

All right, sir, you should not have this. Mister lamps Oh, this is great. I'm very happy.

I mean, holy cow, good times.

I'm glad. I'm glad you made that suggestion.

Yeah too.

Yeah, will it damper the conversation? Maybe because I can't stop sucking.

It's like at a dinner table when dinner gets served and everything's silent.

Yeah. Right, that's the household I grew up in. That's weird when you watch TV shows or movies or just friends that have stories about that was when it was let's talk about your day. Yeah exactly. Not in my house. You hunch over.

You garfit down, and you ee down on a fucking gap exactly.

No one says a word, there's no eye contact. You put your arms around your plate in case someone wants to grab your portions. It's yeah, and you eat as.

Fast as possible as possible.

Yeah, that's good.

It's the only way to get a stomach ache.

Yeah, exactly.

We used to get in trouble all the time for pushing our rice up onto our fork.

Really with our thumb, you have like one little pile.

Yes, why it was just uncouth or something. Yeah.

My mom would be like, you cannot and it was like this idea that in the future I was going to do that in some adult setting right and ruin like my chances in business or something. And it used to really concern me because I'm like, well, I need to eat the rest of this rice and I don't know how else to get it on this fork.

Like it was a real problem. It's never come up in my adult life.

There is never I what are you supposed to do? Is dad the knife?

Like you're supposed to go European.

It's so funny because we've never never talked about that. There weren't a lot of rules for me like that. In my house. It wasn't very strict, but when it came to the dinner table, elbows down, hold your fork this way when you're eating, switch hands.

Don't be an animal.

Yeah, if you're stabilizing your food with the fork, it has to go upside down. You have to use the knife with your index finger. About all that specific. And I'm glad now that you know. When I eat with friends and I see how they're just animals, open.

Mouths, smacking onion, slapping their cheeks.

Corn in their hair, and I'm I just, yeah, my dad was very if I touched the food to get it on my fork. It was like, no, no, no, one.

Thing I did hear about you before I met you is that you are a beautiful eater.

Thank you?

Like pristine.

Yeah, what's the word around town?

Yes, you never you.

Never stay in your turtle necks exactly line three of my bioh yeah, flawless ei her Gil.

Are you ready for summer?

Oh?

My god?

Uh?

Yes and no, I would say, do you have plans? Well, my daughter's in camp and my other daughter is one and a half, so she's just home. She can't go to camp yet. She can't go to camp. She can't do much of anything, but we are going to go. We were like, oh, let's take a road trip and then every everywhere would be terrible for a one and a half year old, So we end up going to uh we might go to San Diego for like a week and we have like an airbnb on the beach

What sesame place.

Sesame places like Sesame Street, but an amusement park.

I never even heard of it.

Really, that's the I that sounds amazing.

Yeah, when I see adults wearing Mick spider Man anything. I'm like, grow up. But the other day I realized I would wear a Burton Ernie shirt any day, any day. I respect Sesame Street on so many developmental levels. I love Sesame Street, and I want to go to this.

It didn't need It's really fun, and I think this is probably the last year for my older daughter to.

Be into it. You know, she's six.

So yeah, when they see Elmo, it's pretty it's pretty dope to watch them go nuts.

Yeah, I just realized, Yeah, it would be of course, would need to go with.

They actually like.

Going to hang out by the entrance.

Yeah, exactly, just what I have with a propeller on it, whistling, transitions, lenses, hands in the pocket, cash.

Coming out of your pocket like a rich child.

I never grew up because I didn't have to. Jobs are for poor people. Oh that's great. I'm where's the camp that your older daughter's going.

She's in a few different ones.

One is in this, one is in uh Alta, Dina, and then she's going to she's doing a production of Annie.

There's like a children's theater.

Wow.

So I'm very excited for that one. She already did one hundred and one Dalmatians. Wow, And she was like the youngest in the sort of group that's like it was like a group of like forty kids, and she had like three lines. That's like a little Dalmatian dog and it was so cute.

That's great.

Yeah, so wait, does she have a part? Is she like, is she Pepper the youngest?

There's no, not yet. They haven't been a signed roles yet.

And is this going to be a public.

There is a public performance?

Would it be weird if I went to that?

I want to go to Annie is my favorite.

Well, it's going to be at the Pantages Theater for real. No, No, that would be way too crazy.

They're gonna sell out the Pantages.

But it is very very cute to see kids that age, yes, like memorized lines and hit their marks and like just look at because like the entire time she's staring at me. Oh while she's performing, you know, she's.

Just like do you see me?

Can you believe we're really doing?

Yeah, it's actually happening. And then I'm like, hey, you're in the scene right now.

That's great fun. So you see your eyes scan the and then like.

Walk towards me a little bit, I'm like.

Oh, that's great.

Oh that's oh, it's so I am really cute.

It's funny without saying it out loud. My phone wants me to see videos of kids trying to find their parents and audiences.

Girl said, should do that and go to sesame place by yourself or those two.

Things and look for children as if you're their parent.

Or the sweet kid I think he's English and he is so excited about being door hoolder number.

Three like that, Oh my god, that's so cute.

Yeah, it's the best. It's like very proud.

Yeah, that one is very good.

Yeah. Yeah, So she has multiple camps. That's great.

Yeah, they're each like a couple of weeks, so you have to sort of find a few different ones. And we want to get her to swim too, so we're just gonna take some swimming lessons.

That's great.

What are you guys doing? Are you guys? Do you have plans?

I got a part of Annie.

Oh my god, yeah, I know. Is it the same.

I auditioned up against your daughter and I destroyed.

It was crazy how much better it was.

And.

Cry, she was really old.

She should not have been there.

I never even heard of Mama war Bucks. Yeah, I'm going to Montana to hang out with my dad for a while. Yeah, it's so cool.

Yeah, what's it like over there?

It is beautiful to where I'm you know, as a kid, I just wished I had grown up in San Diego. We would drive all the way down from Montana to see my dad's cousins and my great grandma in San Diego. And now that I took Montana for granted, my whole life living right in the rocky mountains in a beautiful little town in a valley. When I go back, I'm like, Oh, it's very lucky.

Oh that's so cool too. I was in Montana when I was sixteen.

Do you remember where you went? God?

No, it was like a teen tour that I took in the summer where we went to every single state by bus.

No, wow, one summer.

One summer.

Were they trying to get rid of you?

Who? My parents?

Yeah?

No, it was just like they were like, this is going to be amazing, and we were it was amazing.

We were like it was like twenty horny kids that were.

Just on a bus together, right going to each state and camping out in the middle of Like you know, Colorado and climbing down to the you know, down the Grand Canyon and yeah, first, Yeah, it was amazing.

Going to every state. Seems like it would take all summer.

They did. It took all summer.

Oh, that's amazing.

That's where we went in Nevada, Reno.

Oh that's great.

Some of them were like, Okay, we're getting the end of the state here.

But there was a lot of really awesome memories.

Do you remember I worked on a show once that never got made, and it was supposed to be like a road race comedians. I mean it clearly. The whole time I worked on it, I was like, they're never going to make this. There's simply no way.

Uh huh.

But we had to map it out. Oh sorry, sir. We had to map it out of like a road race from Los Angeles to New York or wherever we were doing it, and it was like comedians in a road race.

Oh sorry, I'm talking to you, sir.

Sorry, like racing against each other.

Yeah, it was a really funny concept that it was like this just is insurance wise alone impossible.

Where did the comedy park come in?

Well that sounded so like, but where did they have like comedians in cars talking to each other.

Yeah, so it's gonna be like Andy Kindler and you know, Louie Anderson were teammates. And then their car has car cameras and they have to race, but they can really only drive certain amounts, so when they get to.

It's like a cannonball run kind of exactly.

Okay, and then they get to a place and then they have to do like a challenge and so if you do it quickly, you can get back on the road, and if it takes you too long. So we were writing these challenges which were all totally insane. But I remember in Wyoming, We're just like, where would they stop and what would they do? Like there was truly nothing in Wyoming. Do you remember Wyoming?

I mean, yes, they they took it at Jackson Hole or Yellowstone Yellow that's.

Where Yellowstone ends.

I justly remember how like a family of buffalo crossing. Oh yeah street.

Wow, it's the only time I and I grew growing up in Montana, you would think buffa we have them on the leashes. But Yellowstone Park you are going to see giant bison and it is yes, they're so big, but do not taunt them. Do not make eye contact, do not get.

Close, do not try to take a picture, whether.

Ye don't, Yes, I figure it's my duty being Montana.

That road thing, that a road show that you just spoke about, just made me think of that. I did have your previous question, which was, have I ever thought about doing another show of like a marathon thing? And I did have this idea one day. I was like on Google Maps, I'm like, how long would it take.

To walk from LA to New York?

And I looked it up and it's like, you know, it was it's like twenty seven hundred miles or something like that, so it would take about you know, eight months or something I don't know to walk.

And I was like, wouldn't it be awesome if I just.

Walked from LA to New York and had like comedians join me on the way, like from like and then. And so that was something I was planning to do. I like talked to like a bunch of marathoners and allow to see if I could do it and how how like how long I would have to leave my family for?

Wow?

That would be exciting.

Yes, And also, just like you, first of all, people would come and start walking with.

You, yes, don't you think I feel like that would happen. I'd far ast gump it a little bit.

Yeah, yeah, because people would love an event. And if you could like live stream the oh live streaming, yeah yeah, or figure out something. But on your bus trip, was there a place where because you were going to all fifty states, you were just like got to that place. I was just trying to imagine. We were just like, well, I guess we'll stop at this rest stop here. But there was like not a lot going on, or was every state?

They had something planned.

For every place that we went, whether it was like camping or or going to a baseball game or you know, going to see the city or you know, cliff diving.

There was like all like it was all planned.

Yeah, wow, that sounds great. That was the only I because there was free food on Wednesdays, and all the girls I had crushes on went to this church youth group. I had like atheists parents really, but I pretended so I could go on these work camps trips where we would go somewhere and do a little bit of work, like help build a fence or something, and we got it was that same thing being in a van with a bunch of other kids. Was so exciting. It is,

God, please be careful.

I never even notice this.

Don't pull your daughter out of camp to bring her to this.

What what if they never do put cars on that ferris wheel. It's just that plank and you have to stand on.

Oh manangerous.

Yeah, it's my I can't believe.

We used to do that as kids.

I love going to these carnivals, though, I was just actually looking at I was telling my daughter about what McDonald's used to be like back in the day, and I was.

Like, here's some pictures of like the uh.

Of what the park and yeah, you know, yeah, the playground and there was like a remember the hamburger jail? Oh yeah, climb up and you'd just be in a jail in a Hamburger's mouth. Yeah, And it was very tough to explain why that existed.

To my daughter.

Yeah, and now, knowing what we know and how kids are smarter than where she probably right away was like, wouldn't it smell like Pete?

Wouldn't it smell like it?

Did?

It is how covid?

Yeah, that ballpit. It wasn't until I was a teenager that I to make my friends laugh. I jumped into a McDonald's ballpit and man, what a bacterial mistake. Oh man, it's not uh clean place to be.

Did you go to camp? Wait did you say it already was?

Did I go to camp? Yeah?

Yes, I went to a few sleep away camps, like Jewish sleep away camps in New York.

So did you have to do like what's their tasks and work? And no, there was not.

It was it was all like it was just you know, a bunch of juice playing basketball canoes and yeah yeah, making lanyards exactly.

Yeah, that's what I would told. I was told Big Sky Bible camp would be. But it was nightmares of them telling me my parents were going to go to hell if I didn't except the Lord, and they are that they were right about. I had nightmares. There was bullies, I got pushed off a dock, and my nipples got ripped off. So many bad things. I had a terrible time.

When you say nipples got ripped off.

They were sitting on the edge of the dock and they tried to convince me that was stigmata.

I'm like, he's choking me. Yeah, that's so scary.

And oh there was a kid from North Dakota named Ian and I said, you're a North Dakotian and he punched me in the stomachs.

You see, you did get a shut up.

But that was an okay joke. It is twelve years old. Oh, there's so much trump. My parents picked me up and I was crying.

You guys are going to go to hell.

They said that's fun. And then my dad uh yelled at the the lead pastor, and the man put his head down and then I respected my dad forever.

My camp was just pretty cheap.

So like the basketball court was in the middle of the baseball outfields and I got fucking whaled with a with a like a baseball.

With both sports were happening in the same time.

That's terrible eye. It was like Action Park. Have you read a to Action Park or heard about.

Actual Oh you have, yes, I used to go there as a kid.

Do oh ship.

But yeah, somebody hit a baseball, they go heads up.

And I'm you know it's an idiot, and I looked up when you when people say heads up, they actually mean heads down when they looked up, and the baseball just hit me right square in the eye.

Of course, That's what anytime when I'm I've been golfing a lot when someone yells for I just look at up at the its like a big Let me make sure this ball is available to my eye socket. Yeah yeah, oh man, that is so funny.

Did you have to was it like a drama at the camp?

Well?

I had a girlfriend at the time. He was my first girlfriend girlfriend, and she was into the black eye.

Oh, isn't it. She was just like, oh, this is mysterious.

Ladies love a bad boy.

Oh yeah yeah.

And then you punch your out, Well it really hurts. It's sexy to say you didn't enjoy it.

That's great mind. If you will play some neo sports plays, it's very painful.

That's not part of my fantasy to be a nurse to your ailments.

Why not? The neo scorn stinks.

Yeah, you lose the whole tough guy thing. Yeah, oh you think that's good? What about this rash? I like a guy with a rat? Oh that's great. I just can't believe they let basketball and baseball happen at the same time.

It's funny because in the when I went to Action Park as a kid, they had a diving board that was over the pool like uh oh the people where people were swimming, like a cliff diving thing. So there were people down below, and you know, they had like teenagers telling people to like keep going, keep you know, like jump off the cliff, like off the diving place, and they were just kids. You would just like dive into a pile of children that were in the pool.

Yeah, that is such a eighties childhood thing that there was no safety protocols.

It was.

Yeah, that place was disturbing, especially uh incorrect in how they planned their stuff is crazy.

Yeah.

Sorry, my sister is calling.

Every Timely podcast.

She's a real creature of habits.

That's terrific. Well I am, I'm going to look up Action Park because I'm just pretending I know what you should.

People died.

Oh that's so crazy, Like you won't click straight on video.

Yeah, wow, there is a in during quarantine I gil got. I started skateboarding again, which i I've done my whole life, and golfing. I've become this weird man of leisure and I need to snap out of it, and I will, but there's I'm very soon. I'm not gonna stop doing the things, but I might stop talking about them. There's an adult skate camp where it's other old dudes and you can, like, you know, launch into foam pits and relearn your old tricks and get hooked up to bungee cords.

That sounds like fun as a kid.

Yeah, it'll be great. Oh let's pretend you live here. Well you do. It's another their metro. That was the same guy.

Are you serious?

That was the same guy that we thought was peering at kids. Were in the same neighborhood.

We recorded with Ever Mayard.

We drove by that guy who was sitting in a not cock car across the street from kids playing on their front line, and I was, I don't like that.

We're driving back and we went to question him, and I.

Basically went and pretended to ask for directions to just see what the fuck was going on.

With a giant monitor of a map.

Next extraordinarily looked like he was scoping these kids out, and I was like, because.

That didn't look like a legit car either, cop car, didn't.

You know it wasn't He's like a security guard.

Bu Yeah, but he was so nice. He's like, oh, where would that be? I would take it? And then I'm like, Karen, he is.

He was nice until you told them how old you were.

Hi, I'm an adult looking for directions, had the bad What about me?

Sir?

Where's the playground? Now you're attacking? That's a terrible scenario.

That's I'm just saying.

That's kind of a wide spance, if that's the right word.

Suddenly that sounded really rare. Spance isn't the.

Word I thought you. I thought you said wide stance me too, And that's.

Probably why I said it. Span is really the word I should have said.

But like, where we were was like South Pasadena, Mmm, ish alta dina.

That it said Metro on the side of his car said Metron and he had the same It was the same guy.

He was all small.

Yeah, yeah, but I'm just saying that's more reason why. It's like he wasn't hired for a certain spot he was in where we saw him. It's just roaming around like a fake cop.

When the stories come out about this guy, it's gonna be real embarrassing.

Passed by. He did give the universal sign for kunneling. Why do on the street.

No, it's just the he likes Van Halen. Davidly rastered that all the time.

Oh wow, I so.

We aren't anywhere near there.

I mean, I guess we're kind of near there.

I know that that was that guy. It's just like I will when I have to plan them out on a lineup kill.

Is there anything you want to promote or oh god, discuss?

Well I am.

I did my first dramatic acting role. So and that is going to come out. It's a show called Monster or this one's Monsters.

It's a Ryan Murphy show about the Menendez brothers therapist.

Oh that's great, that's a huge part.

Yeah, it's very exciting and that comes out in September.

So got processed that I'm gonna watch because I'm sort of I was if there is a murder story that I'm obsessed with. That is the top.

Oh yeah, yeah, there's a lot of good stuff in that, a lot of crazy stuff for that one.

I wish I had known about those auditions because at some point they are in court and they have an uncle that is with them in court or in several photos. And I've been sent that more than the Kurt Monagat photo that apparently I look like an old picture him. People like you are. Yeah, yeah, so I would have nailed that role. Well, well you right now, no agent, Maybe there'll be a sequel, you know.

Yeah, that's September, it comes out, that's in September.

Yet, that's great, that's awesome.

And then when do you do improv?

I you can catch me at random ass cats here and there, and also at Ben Schwartz and Friends at Largo.

Yeah, I will catch you at Largo. Yeah, I like. Uh, that's one of my regular spots. It's usually stand up.

Is your neighborhood boys?

Yes, I have never seen those kids.

He was looking at the mail bugs. Yeah.

I don't like going to and I like them.

We're calling them kids when they were all thirty one.

Literally, that was just an I T Team.

They were they're a gey squad Glendale.

Well you're the best.

Well, thank you so much guys for.

Us all not knowing anything about each other.

And good lord, I love ice cream. It's so good.

Yeah, so good? Did you guys polish yours on?

I did?

I'm all the way.

It's good. Awesome.

Yeah, let's let's be friends online and we'll swap up approcreateor let's do it.

Yea's do it. I'd love to.

Thanks. That was great to say that, Yes we do. You've been listening to do your need to Ride d y n They are Pinapple. This has been an exactly Right production.

Produced by Analise Nelson.

Mixed by Edson Choi.

Our talent booker is Patrick Kottner.

Theme song by Karen Kilgarrett.

Artwork by Chris Fairbanks.

Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at dinar podcast That's d y nar Podcast.

For more information, go to exactly Rightmedia dot com.

Thank you, Oh You're welcome.