S3 - Ep. 59 - Jimmy Pardo

Are you leaving?

I you wanta way back home?

Either way, we want to be there, doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and give us time and they terminol and gay. We want to send you off in style. We wanna welcome you back home. Tell us all about every scared or was it fine? Mal porn?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride?

Do you need to ride? Ride? Do you need with Karen and Chris welcome to Do you need a ride?

This is Chris Fairbanks and this is Karen Kilgarrett. I just want to show off that I can sound like the cast and crew of Roadhouse.

Now that really did sound like Sam Elliott, Patrick Swayze and a third tall guy combined. Right, Yeah, you nailed it.

I am able to go very monster mash low or I can go very vibrato malk skin, heavy metal high and uh everything.

Sing Elmstein a soprano no wow.

But I can't go in the middle where I normally have a voice. I have what we call a classic cold in the business and not COVID.

But it manned.

Do they like I think we forgot how long the common cold lasts. And then when I did this rock and roll show, I was only to do able to do the two extremes of vocals, and I was forced to do guttural death metal screams or eighties glam high screams, and then every normal song that I was good at, the ones I was never worried about. I couldn't sing those all of a sudden, though it's weird. I was able to hit high notes. That's all I'm saying.

So the show went well, No, no, I mean I went.

I showed up.

Everyone in the band learned all these instruments. They learned not the instruments, but they learned the instrumentation of the songs.

They learned the songs, the songs.

Using instruments, by the way, And then always yes, all I had to do. I printed out the lyrics and I was karaoke singing with a little bit of body movement.

I had the easy job.

So I bought a flight and showed up sick and did the show anyway. And during it, your body goes into this panic mode where it discovers new ways of singing while doing permanent damage, I'm sure.

And then it went really well. It was really so it did go well.

The answer is yes, yes, it did go well.

The second show went well. First show, I stank and I felt bad and I slept in the fetal position. Second one, I found new places in my voice and rocked that house and melted faces amazing, and people gave me gifts like cinnamon rolls. Thank you, Amelia. Anyway, it's over now, and I just wanted to give you an update.

Thank you. It's the energy that I like, not the story, but the energy behind it that I'm enjoying right right, looking down the entire time, well and like you're confessing something.

No one, no one's seeing me. That's the thing I was. I was coming through with though. Plus there was that high.

Scream, which I think people probably enjoyed. So after you do something like that, you gotta you gotta back out and get kind of you got it?

Oh go inside.

Yeah, I get calm because I just did a heavy metal scream, so you got to pull back a little.

I see it.

I'm not a shock jock, right, I get that.

You know what's weird is when you did the heavy metal high scream, it muted out your zoom and I didn't know what you were doing for three seconds, and then you came in strong and I got it.

Yeah, when we have today's guest on because he's a friend, you'd think it'd be just a relaxing like, oh, it's going to be easy, breezy. Here's someone I trust that I know we have mutual love and respect for each other. But I get nervous because and I don't mean that in an old guy way. Today's cast is a godfather of podcasting. I think podcasting and I've done no research started in two thousand and five. Maybe Jimmy was right there right at the beginning. I didn't think him and

Guy's name, that's not an intro. What are you doing?

No, I'm so sorry. I'm really blown it today.

Huh.

I am very excited for Chase today, Ladies and gentlemen.

Boy, It's just I've been awful so far.

What's happening?

I don't know. I thought I was. I'm just giving that. Okay.

You know him from clubs and colleges and cruise ships all across this great country, land or water. Everyone put your ears together for our guest today, mister Jimmy Pardo.

Who.

So exciting.

Thank you, Karen. You can I just address two things up, not if you're going to roast to me? Where am I right? Are you? First podcast? I think it's okay.

If you guys would have said, hey, Chris is not feeling well, we're gonna have to cancel. I think that would have been okay. It wouldn't have been upset. Maybe maybe in the right call. And if we were still doing it where like you drove people around, I would probably ask you to pull over and let me out. That's where we're at at this point. There's there's the roasting that I was promising. Probably yeah that I requested not happen.

Yeah are you? Are you? Am I right? In those dates? Off the top of my head, I believe podcasting.

I believe Adam Curry formerly of MTV started around two thousand and four two thousand and five, and then Ricky Gervais was in first, and then I believe Tod Glass put it best in his book that I was the first comedian that you knew of that had a podcast, because there were some other comedians that did have have one, but I was the first one that you knew of in two thousand and six, and that I do appreciate you making very clear when you compare me to Adam Crolla,

Decided instead to be an asshole, right.

Right, right, Yeah, well, you got two routes and you're gonna get the same numbers.

I think if you, well, what I'm what I'm discovering, Chris, based on my numbers, is that the asshole route is the way to go because I think Rogan and Door and Corolla are all buying mansions.

And I'm being funny and true to myself.

Right, that's right.

You should have gone solid two percent.

Uh.

Yeah, I should have horseshooed the thing. And uh, I'm so, but I'm left.

I'm a left to you guys, I'm a left and then before you know what, I'm wearing a red hat. So that's what I should have done. This is politics with Jimmy Parter, with being vague about it. Yeah, you're so left that you're right.

Uh, huh, you're right. I don't want to be wrong, you know what I mean? Baby, Come on here, you sugar daddy. I got a smokey on my tail.

Jimmy, do you remember there was podcasting early days? There was a It was out in Santa Monica. It was literally like an airplane hanger and there was mobile homes inside the airplane hangar and people were recording individual shows in each mobile home. So like Greg Barrett had one and I think Dave Anthony like people were doing. But I don't know if it digital radio.

No, it was, it was.

It was.

It was digital radio, and it was it was Comedy World Radio.

Comedy World.

That's yeah, wow. Yeah.

And Greg and Dave were the same show. They were the a They had a man versation that a daily man versation. Karen and Paul Gil Martin had a show there every Sunday that I was very grateful to have been a part of. Ye and Terry, a guy named Terry was in charge of it all. He was a great guy and a smart guy and he knew good talent. And then he was also.

Forced to have other people on the on the on the dial as well.

Right, But was that what year I thought that was like early two thousands.

Well that's early because that wasn't podcasting. That was that was radio.

It was I believe it was fields logging. I think the troops got it. Christ to have a little respect for the troops. I know, you don't care for this country the way that I do, but they, I mean Navy, I'm cool with. Okay that because of the village people. Yeah, yeah, getting there suck it. Yeah, but that was the funny you're right about. That was out near Loyola University, and it was like, yeah, it was like this bigger plane hangar and then each studio was in like.

In trailers inside the warehouse.

It was the weird like it felt like a dream. Yeah, because why, Like we're like, why was inside an airplane hangar? But there was mobile homes there.

It was like that kind of why not have the mobile homes just out in the park. Why pay the rent on the warehouse?

Sound like audio just for sound safety? I'm not, but I always think I think about well, I didn't know his name was Terry, but I just think about that guy where it's like it took twenty years basically or fifteen years for podcasting to get kind of like where everybody knew about it. I'm like, that guy really did dig the first trench.

But again, that wasn't podcast that was radio he was doing. That was that was. That was a radio station. It was Comedy World Radio. It was it was it was.

It was digital.

It was digital.

It was podcasting just in a different form.

But it was live. It was live. It wasn't oh shit shit. And by the way, I realized that Terry Daniser was his name. Nice Poul, thank you you you you've spoken of.

Terry ended up getting me a great couple of great jobs actually, uh in actual show business. So he's been good and he actually came to my uh when Danielle and I rented a house once, we had a housewarming party first the last house warming party I've ever had, and uh, Terry was one of.

The people that came.

So that's look at this good person.

Yeah, it was a good man.

Coincidentally, the fans of our podcasts are called Danny Sores. Now that that is quinc Why am I crazy?

Yes, it is because of the do you need a ride of sours? Is that what it is? Yeah? I think that's that's what they're going by we Karen and I did not endoors or yeah, that's that was for support on the streets. I support it now, Oh do you? Yeah? Yeah, I do.

I should start it. So do you remember Jimmy doing podcasts before? Did you do a bunch of podcasts before you started yours?

Or no?

We start.

We sat down to my table in March of twenty in my dining room table, March of twenty sixteen, two thousand and six, brother, and that was it. And the goal was for it to be a half hour every other week. And that show lasted an hour, and then we said, let's just do this every week, and then we did an hour every week, and now I think we do.

Seven hours a week.

And wow, people seem to enjoy what we're putting out. They seem to enjoy what we're laying down. As the jazz man would say, yeah, yeah, I.

And did you not know Matt? You didn't know Matt? You've got to know him on air, kind of like Karen and I have, right, you are speaking of my co host and producer, Matt bell Knapp. He was a shan of mine.

He ran that a special thing, really message board, and he was a fan of mine. Who would come to all of my UCB shows and so.

On, and then the message board.

Yes, and he approached me about doing it, and to your point, I did not really know him, and we had a couple of meetings and then we got to know each other on the air, and we've become great friends, and our kids are friends.

And you know, we've kindly, you know, we've done it sixteen years. We've kind of grown up together, perfect pair, perfect. Thank you so much.

I'm very I you know, I say it all the time that you know, I've got Ellie Hopeberg who's our video guy, and garn Cocker who's our ten year intern, and me and Matt and I And on paper, none of us should be friends, none of us, sincerely, I don't.

I have nothing in common with any of them. And yet the four of us.

In the room, we really work well together. And I'm very very grateful that I had that these three people have. I don't I'm not mary Anne Williamson, but I mean, like, I'm very grateful they've come into my life because they've really they've helped me make a great show, and I'm very very grateful for Yeah, and you get to you know, I.

Know you're joking about the other stuff of all the kind of like men of a certain age with a certain background who go in a direction and then they just are like, oh no, this is what's going to work. I'm going to start telling everybody how to think and

I want you to record, Well we recording this, I guess if we're doing a podcast, I'm going to lift that what you just said, Karen and and put it on my phone and play it back for what I'm feeling low because that was the nicest thing to say.

Thank you, so much for that. I mean, that's sincerely. I know.

I mean, look, we you know, we're comedians and we bust balls and we you know, I mean, I open up this thing with making fun of Chris, you know, not taking a lozenge.

But thank you for that. That means a lot, sincerely. It warms my heart that you said that. Yeah, sharing you did that to me last episode two.

You took two minutes without thinking about what you were going to say, and it just flowed out of you and it made me feel good.

Have you been are you gonna? Are you?

It's like you've become I have terrible, terrible cancer. I have the bad kind of cancer. There's no way, no, you know what it is. I think we spend a long time as comedians, like you know, taking our fingernails and scraping up a mountain, and it's very difficult. It brings out the worst in most of us. We're all very ambitious and very competitive. We're also all very insecure and sensitive, is why we are comedings, and that brings

A monolith, you don't have time. I wish in the airport, this is true, Careen. I was in the airport.

I did my first road gig last week, my first road gig, only my second one since the beginning of the pandemic. I've not been traveling quite a bit. I mean I've been traveling at all. And I was in the airport and I went to the you know, the I think the last remaining bookstore on the planet is at the airport. And I saw it and I won't be able to pull it now. I'm grateful. I pulled

Who wrote, Oh, that's my friend kercle Garve's book. So that was so you don't have time to do your favorite things. I don't know when you sleep enough with you, I mean.

I agree, no, I agree enough with the murder and the drives and the books.

I don't know. I put it in any killer there for a second. The books, but the book was a third thing.

Although I had three things, and it got confusing. What is the name of the book, Karen, because it's driving my brain does I can't pull it.

It's called Stay Sexy and don't get Murdered.

That's what it was. Yes, very nice.

I liked the name of the book, and then I saw that it was yours, and I immediately brought it back to the tab.

Is that I will not purchase this after all. I I was excited to buy it, and then I was like, yo, that's a great title. I'm gonna get this. Just sight Unseen walked up and then WHOA has a.

Sling nine don't Yeah, yeah, no way, yeah, it's it's a They always have the new releases in the airport, but uh, you gotta go through security and everything.

I don't even have a flight. I go there to buy books.

It's it's a hassle, but I tell you, you know, if you want to get a book, it's the place to go.

And all hardcover. They don't they don't believe in the paperback.

Yes, right, and I get you for forty dollars and it'ssional magazine.

Yeah.

This ain't a dime store where you have to walk through a beaded necklace door.

Wall to get your smut. These are hardcover. This is fancy. It's open air.

It's la Yeah.

Yeah, Chris would would it? Would a day quill be a bad idea? I? Uh no, I took a night quill. It's the same thing. No, it's not time.

It's very different.

Have you, either of you ever been to the Seattle Airport?

Sure? Yes, Holy there was.

I mean, not only is there, like there's just an art gallery of like posters, like Pearl Jam posters and all this amazing artwork. They have a sub pop store in there that just has a wall of cassette tapes of all the early wet made sub pop get purchased by probably Warner Brothers.

I don't know.

But it's like a clothing store. It was I'm like, who, how is this in an airport right now? The guy working the register was sleeve tatted and the like colored hair, and it.

Was filled with cool people.

I'm like, well, that's just as specific as having like a you know, Pendleton store or something place that only sells little handbags or little jewelry or whatever.

Right, they're like, might as well make something good for people to do while they're stuck here on a five hour line.

Almost missed my flight because of how cool that store was. I kept buying, But you.

Didn't buy anything, right, did you buy anything? You got a hat, I got a sweatshirt. Oh you did shirt? That Subpop logo just I grew up with it.

I did, like all the bands I grew up loving, not just you know, there's Nirvana and Soundgarden and mud Honey in those early bands, but all current bands too, like they are and there's a record label store in an airport. Meanwhile, you go to Lax and there's just it's just a dirty carpet and uh.

You know, Chris, you know that.

When you walked out of sub Pop, the guy behind the resident went to the back room and said, hey, boss, we sold something. They don't ever they don't ever sell anything. That it was like a museum. This is a cool looking place.

And then he was in a line of a dozen people. I'm not even kidding pal, I'm not kidding. I believe I knew you wouldn't believe me. I don't believe I knew that you wouldn't.

And now I'm telling you about the dozen people I feel I'm lied to. I feel like you're brought into this podcast to be I'm not lie.

It's our new segment, Light to Jimmy, Light to Jimmy.

So I get a shop every week?

No, wait, can I can I do a lie?

Yeah?

That that's actually the truth, Just like Chriss Chris is like there is a line at the sub pop store in the Seattle Airport. Jimmy said, five, Well, that's a line. You know, A line's a line. Here's my lie, here's my lie. That's actually the truth. My dog was sick. I was going to drive home for Christmas. All of a sudden, my dog was sick. I run her down to the emergency vet. They're like, her organs are shutting down.

I know my line here. You're lying right right.

This is a good segment, you guys making that up lying. I swear to go.

Here's the part I don't buy. I don't buy Posey taking it upot herself to call the bee guy.

She's the one that saved Britney spears. Are you kidding? No, that's a good point.

She's not associated Yeah, I know I.

Made that mistake before. She's associated with that. What a perfect word, perfect word.

So now the little dog, he's okay, she's totally fine. And I thought, you know, because I was like, oh, great, now I have a dog that like can't get stung by a bee or what you know. I was so mad that I was going to have to have like a high maintenance dog that I might have to pay actual attention to. And then we've heard that, I'm like, all right, get rid of those bees were all set.

That's awesome. Good for her.

I don't think I would have ever taken that upon myself and went well when she gets bactual calls to figure it out, that would have been meat.

But good for Randy post Randy's she's very responsible son.

Killer bees, if it's a dog, it certainly won't kill a human. Right, they're not killers.

It's for every ten pounds of a mammal, one be staying will kill you. So my dog is fifteen pounds. So she got stung and was like like a kind of on the verge, but they were it was okay. But if she had like stepped into the hive, I think she'd be dead. And if a person steps into a hive. Those are the stories you've heard of killer bees, where it's they get swarmed and stung multiple times and then I and then that's how you.

That would have ruined my week and weekend. Then that was Blossom.

Yes, it was oh god, you don't my new one who's little and she's very head.

That would happen. I know me too. Wow, did you guys ever work with the comedian Killer Bees?

I've seen Killer Bees. I've never worked with him.

He had that he had that catchphrase of save up where we would say, have you ever been to the Disneyland? Same ap.

He was from Nashville, and he would he would crush, he would destroy. Yeah, and uh, you know he was He was a very nice I only worked with him one time. He could not have been a nicer guy. Uh.

I know that some comedians.

You know, he's a punchline to some comedians because he had a catchphrase and you know, he had a Southern accent, so certainly he's stupid. Uh, but he was a nice guy and funny enough. But yeah, that's it, Caroen, I interrupted you you're gonna ask me a question. I apologized. Hands on the wheel, Chriss, hands on cereal ten and two.

Baby Larry the cable guy was very fucking nice to me, and I realized, oh, you're just a person that was forced into a character and you kept doing it, and uh, he just wanted to talk about Uh He's like, oh, you're into skateboarding, and he'd try and talk about the things he thought I was interested in. And then he had weird jokes that he would beg me to try on stage because he thought his audience wouldn't like his

He's like, riff with it, do what you can.

And then he'd come out and watch his dream joke get performed by his opener because he felt his fart and sleeveless poop hat audience wouldn't enjoy it.

And it really made me. How did it? How did the birthday cake? I still do it. I've done it now for twelve years.

Is that true?

No?

But I it did go well, and I'm like, and when he told me it, it was it was like the premise and where he wanted it to go. I'm like, that is a funny idea.

He Chris to your point. He was on Conan O'Brien's program Watch. The show was called Conan and he it was It was on television. It was television like a talk show format.

Tyler Park near Loyola. No, No, that wasn't podcasting.

Okay, all right, he's on panel, you know, he's he's doing his segment, and I forget what writer came up to me in the green room and said, if this was any other comedian, we would call these jokes genius

Yeah, and he he when he was coming through Austin. Uh where I first met you when you came to town.

Right, you were fresh off of being awarded funniest guy in Austin.

Yeah, oh yeah, okay, well you were fresh off that are.

You saying he was on a bit of an ego drug.

It seemed like he was a little high on his horse, by the way, Karen, I was there two years, two years in a row. I was there right after the person who won Funniest Person in Austin.

I was there.

They went, well, you know, you know who should who could follow those guys? Pardo and why make me work? Why have to follow the guy with it?

Because they never that city has a history of not appreciating their own talent. But I remember you coming to town and you were I immediately loved you. I thought you were making fun of me and being mean. But you give this wink and you do it on stage, and you you do it in person where you kind of roast someone, and then you immediately balance it out with self deprecation or some indication that you're kidding.

You might even just say I'm kidding.

Uh.

And I loved it right away, and you've always done it. Yeah, I loved you right away. Yeah. That was two thousand and three and I had just won that thing. That was good for you. You deserved it, Yeah, well twenty years ago, why not. Yeah, but I just went back, Yeah, oh you did. Yeah?

Did they appreciate you? That was that for that rock and roll show that you wouldn't stop talking about earlier.

That's only because I talked about it on the last episode. I understand christ It was to ring in the New Year, which, as you and I both know, what a great gig New Year's.

Someone gets punched and blood shoots out of her head as a Christmas tree falls onto a family that didn't receive their fish, if we could be so lucky, and can it be near the docks?

Sure?

Anyway, was that Oxnard you guys that you had your Faithful New Year?

Yeah, but it definitely was the part that was near Oxnard? Yeah, where you get stabbed for surfing the wrong wave. Oh boy, Yeah, they'll throw in a plugged in toaster.

Jimmy said that you recently have gone back onto the road a.

Little bit, just tod, just just dipping my toe in.

Yes, And how can you tell us the difference from pre COVID A pluses minuses the experience? And do you feel you've changed as a comedian as a person?

Boy, that's that's a lot of It's a six part seventeen questions, Jimmy.

I'm going to just answer them. Interrupt Oh jeez, will you play back the tape so I can't know where you order?

That was asked, success, And here's the I went back on the road back in September of twenty twenty two.

I did Bloomington, Indiana the Comedy Addict, which was which is the best club of the country.

And I loved every second I was there, and the shows were great, and I was very, very grateful that my fans came out that said the people that just go to the comedy attic are well educated, smart comedy people.

So that was wonderful. I enjoyed every second meeting.

But then I sadly had to cancel the remainder of my dates in twenty twenty two. And then last week I went to Paris, Texas. Chris, you were there a couple of years ago for the Tower Comedy Festival at a club that is a dive. I know. But Darryl Felsburg, who's a great comedian, a any guy and a great guy. He curates this festival and he wants Chris and you know, me and Todd Glass and Todd comics there. Yeah, and

So yeah.

Uh so it being back, my first my first time back after even that Bloomington one.

Uh.

First of all, I felt great to be on stage and do what I do and to have an audience that was just receptive and it's got this festival vibe. It so it seems like it's more important than just a comedy show at a bar. So it felt good and and and you know, you know what, I'll answer your question, Karen, do I feel different? I'm ending my shows and this is bizarre. I admit this because after

And that's kind of how I've changed.

Because I feel like we haven't, you know, like we have to remind ourselves to be kind to each other after kind of the you know, the polarizing and the everything that's going on.

Yeah. Yeah, So is that a weird way to do a comedy show? Yes, of course it is. It's very bizarre. But you know what, who gives you I'm fifty something years old, who keeps a shit? Yeah? You know what I mean? If you walk out going that was weird that he was nice at the end, well then scram yeah. Well it's no uh John Morgan.

He ended his show with singing the national anthem, which actually would I have done?

Okay there, wait a minute, I'm going to make a note of that. I've got a gig next week of Cincinnati. You're you're recommending the National and show like did he have the fact she has a cappella or did he have a musical accompaniment on his own?

And actually in his in John's he did nail it. Yeah.

Really that's a tough song to sing. They won't stop telling you. Yeah, yeah, that's a tough song. Yes, right of course it is.

Yeah, it always has been hundreds of years difficult.

Difficult when Whitney decided to do it, it's been difficult for years this whole time.

Yeah.

But also, Jimmy, don't you think like people are going to comedy clubs to get to laugh and get the

Yeah, yeah, I guess that's kind of what I feel. That said, I feel like I'm on a team and I'm out of side. I'm very one. You know.

Obviously if made a mistake, if I wasn't in Paris, Texas, I would have been, you know, running my mouth about you know, Trump being the biggest dummy in the world. Yeah, who votes for Marjorie Taylor Green? And how how could anybody go into a booth and go Lauren bootwirts my girl? Like I would, I would make front of all of that. But in Paris, Texas, I don't want to be dragged behind a pickup truck back to somebody's you know barn, so well they do put.

You in a wheelbarrel. I uh so you're not actually being dragged. I've been to the festival.

I've been to it, and when I went to it years ago, I wasn't even thinking about that, and so I'm not surprised to hear you say it was let's go Brandon flags everywhere, and it was ufronting.

It's pretty maga. It's not just conservative. It's it's a pretty magacity.

A lot of the comics who I still talk to and I really feel like I became friends with where like Christian comics that you understand it's that part of the country.

Yeah, that's right, Well, it's it's a little bit of it's you know, similar to the Larry the Cable Guy, where it's like you start doing your act and then on stage you're having you know, you're either successful or not successful, and then you're making the adjustments to get when you're unsuccessful, to get back into the successful area.

You know, to speak about the same thing you just said, but not politically, is if you make your living doing nothing but one night or bars, and you could certainly make your living doing that. I'm not putting it down, but you will also to your point, you will bend towards making that particular right, that style of audience laugh.

So you may go a little dirty or a little easier with the comedy.

So because you want to kill to feed your eagle, like you said, nobody wants to bomb any at any location. But if that's all you're doing, then that's kind of what you're going to lean towards. Uh, as far as comedy goes, and then certainly as far as you know, politically goes.

If that's the angle you're going at.

Yeah, next thing, you know, you're walking around the halls with a white balloon like a moron.

Yeah.

Also just days late, like so late for that.

She's should be wrong if she's bury in the zeitgeys, she's smarter than you.

Oh God, I accept your apology.

What I do not accept your collegeologize is that is that the trailer home thing that you screwed up, it was live.

Oh god, your apology. I've been stewing on it. I can't fast, I can't get past.

Maybe that, maybe that's why there was the hangar and then the mobile homes was like there was some sort of radio element to it where they had to be in the place to be transmitted.

But wait, but if you think back to your Wolfman Jack years and all stuff like that, weren't weren't those out trailers in the just out in the middle of the field somewhere, weren't they?

Weren't they little shacks?

Hold on, I'm trying to think of what happened on WKRP in Cincinnati.

That was a real radio station.

Yeah, they were in a building.

Yea, they building right now?

Both I get For my Christmas, I gave my dad a w k RP shirt and a DVD box set of the entire season which has arrive.

Oh wait, is that true? It's still so. Did you print out the cover of it like to put in a car? Yeah? I mailed him a promise of what's to come.

But that show is it's such a realistic, U specific commentary on early radio days.

And my dad was a radio guy as you both.

No, I do know, and I know your sister very well as well, and uh she's she's good people to whole Fairbanks Clan's terrific.

Uh, really good people.

Chris, did the T shirt arrive or and or the boxet or shirt arrive. It's nice.

It's like someone stole that box at someone stole I.

Think were stolen. I agree with that. Yeah.

I mean, did you see the thing on the LA news where the trains were getting robbed and they actually showed footage of the the train tracks and it's just a bunch of empty Amazon boxes.

Yeah? Did There's where my windshield repair kit went.

I saw that and I literally was like, I wonder where that is. I'd like to go down and take a look.

I remember seeing that footage and I'm just running on the train tracks running. I love Howard Hessman.

And holding Chris's package above his hell yep, Lonnie Anderson, everybody guy stroking it right, just running to City of Industry to look at his stuff.

Love it.

I actually had not to go political again, but just for one moment, because this was kind of a funny experience because my dad is in his eighties, but he

That probably hit her right in the heart.

Well, because what do you it's the It was the weirdest thing where I was like, this isn't the internet, Like, I'm not here to find with you, I don't. I just wanted to chit chat and like have dinner with these people that I like like And they were screaming. They were not It wasn't like you know, oh, it

And you know what, Karen, had had you said anything back there, let's say you.

Would have said what you just said. You wish you could have said, you would have been the crazy person. Could you believe the way that she reacted. We're just trying to have a conversation and she went crazy on us, and it's like, so you can't say anything because you can't fight with's weird.

I mean there's no winning, that's it.

Well, because yeah, because you're it's almost like the point us to fight, to be fighting where it's like I don't want to fight with you. I'm exhausted for you know, it's like, who has the time for this spending? Like do you do this all day long? Do you do this with everyone you meet?

Right?

How do you?

How are you in the world?

You know, I'm gonna pull something up here, and that sounds dirtier than I mean it to be.

Somebody somebody tweeted this out and it applies to this and and I'm sure you guys all know Quinn Sutherland.

You know Quinn? Yeah, yes, wonderful woman. And so she retweeted this, which the only reason I saw.

A guy named Anthony DeVito tweeted this out. You don't rebut psychotic nonsense. It's quicksand you grab a fucking vine and swing over it to get to where you need to be. And I took a photograph of that or a screenshot because it was like, you know what, you nailed it, dude, this is the Yeah. I don't know this guy, but it was like, thank you for saying it like this, because it made dumb comedian Jimmy Parter's brain understand.

Why am I? Why am I fighting with that? Just they're not gonna move on? Yeah?

No, I think Anthony DaVita is a comment.

I don't know him. Is he okay? Yeah? Well that if he's listening, I hope he gets a nice charge on a pardo mentioning him. Right.

We heard earlier Karen said it. I'm one of the best people. Are lucky to be listening to anything that I do. So if I say to Vito's name, the guy should probably call his parents to let him.

Know it's a full salute.

Yeah. I it does bum me out.

Ever since you said, oh, these other folks that are doubling down on the two percent are buying houses, and you feel like you're missing out because if you look at a map, if you look at a map like one of those maps where they always have the uh, here's all the blue dots and they're throughout all the red dots. They are throughout the country. And then it just seems like the cities are are the democratic dots.

Sense as a business, yeah, but then I want to do it.

It's not the business I got into. So now, probably chur you said that I said I was missing out. I don't think I'm missing out.

I know.

No, Yeah, I'm very you know. I've got the greatest wife and son in the world. We got a nice house, I got a nice job.

Right.

I listened to the talking heads. I mean everything is really needs to be.

As long as you have David Byrne in your life, you're not missing out on all these gigs.

Can I tell you something.

I went to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in twenty sixteen, or it could have been fifteen, and it was right after David Bowie died and they opened the show.

Wait a minute, what yeah, just kid, Yeah, I'm sorry.

The show opened with David Byrne singing Fame and I never met David Byrne in my life, and the version that he did was phenomenal.

It was great.

But for some reason, he comes off very stand offish and like he's going to be a dick, right that That's that's how I see David Byrne. So he comes off stage and I happened to be right in the hallway backstage where he comes off, and.

I meant and I meant this, I literally, like my body couldn't stop me from saying this. I just went that was great, because it was. And he said he stopped and it took my hand and said thank you so much. Oh my god, what a pleasure to see I see.

You, and kept moving and I was like, I would I would have bet money David Byurn would have just kept walking past me had I said that.

And I was wrong. And what I'm saying is, don't judge a book by its giant suit.

Yeah, don't you think it's like because that character that he has kind of played on on stage as the lead singer of that band where it's very it's very like cutting edge and art pop and kind of like the coolest of the cool and we grew up in like the or Not, you know, but the nineties where everyone was like aggressively rude and like if you weren't in, you were out, and that kind of like shit where

Let me ask you, guys a question is two comedians. Is it is it lame?

If I write down don't judge a book by his big suit it's I was good, and it the fact that.

I know that came here from your organic brain corner very much right it.

Now I can write it, Okay. So when you see him do that at at the Largo, you're not gonna go oh, look at me. He did something out in his act.

No, no, all right, that's where you write jokes when you're riffing with pals. I think that's been my problem. I haven't hung out with anybody since twenty nineteen. Hey, what's up, don't what's that character? I'll tell you what David.

Character Burne would have been like, ew shut.

I rewatched it and I know it's older, but it was during COVID times that the Comedians and Cards getting Coffee episode with Eddie Murphy and he was like, I used to write all my jokes hanging out with friends, and I don't hang out with friends.

I'll say, oh, that made everyone law laugh. Let me write it down.

So I feel like I don't I can't write material right now. And for that to come from that guy.

It's like, oh, okay, that validates how I've been figued. Yeah that's not sure.

Hey Eddie's not doing it? Yeah yeah, but Eddie hasn't been writing jokes for thirty years.

Yeah yeah right.

Although did you see him on Fallon? He was just on Fallon recently, either Fallen or Colbert. Sorry I can't remember, but he was so funny, really so yes, I'll try. I'll find the clip and send it to you. So funny and so real. Yeah, really did you see.

Him in dream Girls? He was amazing in Dreamgirls?

He was amazing.

You know, I'm not one of these people like that guy deserved an award because he was like he really did, though, deserve the Academy Award. He was so yeah, you would never go you know who that was? It was Eddie Murphy and he was, yes, as good.

As Denzel would have ever been or anybody else that would have fit the casting for that role.

Uh, he's such a good actor. Yes, I mean Bowfinger, may I just say both?

You can say it. I'm not going to listen to it, but you could say it.

Or the fact that and anyone can rewatch it and Beverly Hills Cop is a perfect movie. And at that time I don't think he had any chopps as an actor, like as a dramatic actor, but he's so good, subtly good at the actual drama in that movie. He's like, he's one of my heroes. And it's not because of his stand up, of course, because it's not very raw and delirious.

Yeah yeah, yeah, but growing up he was on when when I first started watching SNL, like when I was ten, he was a cast member and he was so electric. It's like it's so obvious that he was more than just you know, gifted in more than just comedy. It's like he wasn't it wasn't it clearly he just had it in that way, Like anytime he was on screen, you're just like, I don't whatever he's doing, I'm on.

And when he was on SNEL, he's probably nineteen or something, right, just a chug.

I think, Yeah, I think he was really young.

Yeah, so good.

Yeah, I recommend that uh seinfold the Comedians and Cars episode.

I loved him in that.

Yeah, is there a way to get that split screen so I could just see the passenger seat version of that?

I know, I know why is Seinfeld such a stick in the mud?

He right, he kind of somebody will say something funny and he has a way of, yeah, of a either not getting it or b turning it into like how they can make that into a twelve minute.

Bit as opposed to just laughing at just shy.

I promise you specifically on this episode, you won't feel that he's so excited obviously to be in the car with him, and they do have this history from early stand up. So actually in that episode, that's why I enjoyed it so much. They were both great in it.

Yeah, I will.

I will watch that because I have not watched those for that reason. Do they Yeah, it's Robes. When he was sitting he was I think he was with Gary shandling uh and he was at that coffee shop and said, no.

It wasn't it was. It might have been Larry David, it doesn't matter.

He's talking to somebody across the table and he's like, can you believe that I came up with this idea?

Just comedians talking to each other on camera?

It's like, you didn't come up with that, Jerry, You're like the forty nine thousandth person to come up with that idea.

You're just the most famous to have come up with that idea.

Also, what is the empty, deep dark pit inside of you where you are Seinfeld saying out loud to another adult on camera, can you believe I came up.

With this idea? Ye?

Right? I mean when is what?

When?

Is it enough?

Like?

What when it does it register for you personally that you are you are already there? Already and you don't need to.

Do that, and you've done it all. You won, you won, you got it all.

Your name is synonymous with stand up comedy, with comedy, with successful comedy, with legendary comedy, and yet still the scraping and the grabbing it like what why?

Yeah? In that curious that you can see that there's still like a low self esteem in there. It's weird. It's weird him because you know what, he deserves all the success. I wish him. He was the first. This is true. My brother I lived out in California in.

The mid eighties to go to uh, the American Academy of Dramatic Arts, and uh my brother came out to visit and then drive back to Chicago with me. And but while he was here, Seinfeld was taping his first special at the Roxy on Sunset and my brother and I went and so like that, I thought he was great then, you know what I mean, like, oh my god, I get a chance to sit in that guy, the guy saw on Johnny Carson.

I get to watch his special and I'm years old. You weren't doing stand up yet, you know, I was just a kid. I was just a kid, right, out of high school. Yeah, yeah, okay, and it was, uh, it was great.

It was you know, So you know, I guess I'm saying that like I've been into. I think he's I think he's the best of that generation. I really, yeah, he's he's a technician, he's great. So I don't want my I don't Probably part was bitter about everything. I'm a comedian trying to find funny. Yah, Jerry's great.

But you know, I think what it is too is kind of what I was saying before. Just like, to me, the joy of comedy and being with it's like you know what's funny, and you're spending time with people who also know what's funny. And in this world there aren't that many people like that that are attuned, nicely attuned that way, that can hear it and that can appreciate it.

That's but you nailed it, you.

Yeah, you also maybe think cared of what you just said, like when we and again we're not we're not special people.

We've just chosen to do this and if if we walked.

Into almost quote Steve Martin, if we walked into a plumbers convention, we wouldn't know what to talk about either.

Uh yeah.

But when we go to a family function or to a if I go to a school event for Oliver, uh I don't know how to talk to people because they don't they're not they don't have that rhythm that we have where we kind of know we could say things to each other and you're going to laugh at it, or you're gonna bust by balls because it wasn't funny. You're The last thing you're gonna do is just stare at me and then walk away, which is what happened

But these days, well at least for myself and Chris and I have talked about this before, where because of quarantine and COVID and all these things and the kind of social basically the social chalkboard has been erased, and we're all back at square one, awkwardly trying to like re establish any sense of who we are and what we're doing. Yes, like that idea where I feel like now we're all awkward now, we all don't know what

What uh, completely off topic. The white dog either that's the that's the beast thing.

Yeah, that's her.

She's a surviva.

One eye is one eye still kind of lazy because of the she just has a.

Dark skin around one eye and skin around the other.

Oh okay, because it looks like he just got a little fight or something.

She is, she's kind of so. I found her on a like a dog rescue website. Brian Cook's girlfriend Ye worms for a bunch of different dog rescues, so she recommended one and I picked her because I thought she was old. Because because my dog Frank is fifteen and so I was like, Frank needs a companion. And so I was like, Oh, I'll get this old dog. You know, no one's going to pick her. I was like kind of like, oh, that's sad. I have I better get that dog. No one's going to pick her. I go

That's so cool. You couldn't have even pulled that off on purpose, so that I know. So this dog just doesn't photograph. Well, that's what we learn from that story.

It's zoom it zoom.

These are tiny screens.

It's just like me where you got to get the angle right, you know what I mean, or it's like not, it's not gonna.

You heard that story about Barbara streisand recently right where she refused to go on Jimmy Kimmel because uh, Kim went and that she had to be shot from a certain angle and she.

Has to sit on the host side basically, and Kim was.

Like, well, I'll do it, but we got to acknowledge it why we're doing it, or else it's gonna be weird. And She's like, no, you can't acknowledge it, and which is a shame. I love Barber Streis and I went and saw her live in concert, way too late in my life.

But she's amazing.

She is amazing. It was the show was a little sluggish, to be honest with you.

It was a little she does solve those bali it's a lot of and you know what, it was a lot of I hope I get the group right.

The four dudes El Divo is that the four dudes who sing?

Oh those singers, Yeah, you know, they were part of it, and it was they did a lot of it.

And I'm not there to see Il Divo, you know, even if it's even if you're just gonna do thirty five minutes, Barbara, just do thirty five and let me get in and out. I don't need to see Il Devo to pat out the show. So I feel like I got a full show. I'm I'm good just seeing a legend do a tight set and scram But well, yeah.

You know what I appreciate about that story though, is obviously that angle was because of a hurt a nose reason, right, Like She's like, oh, I can't be seen from this angle. My mom always used to talk about my mom and Barbaris streisand had a similar nose or that's my mom's thing, And I bet that's why she was like, no, this is my good side. Well a show if I but she never She's like, that's how I'll deal with it.

If I'm on your But at least it looks to me at the age that she's at, and again, she's a legend, she's everything she's gotten. You could also laugh at yourself and say and if Jimmy says, well, we have to address it go you know what, Yeah, let's have some fun with that and then go And then even all you have to say is yeah, I think I look better from the side, and you move on and nobody talks about it ever again. Right, Yeah, but

That's the joke.

So we had to get a desk remade because of you, and she's like, yeah, this is my side, and then.

Okay, we're going to commercial. That got a huge laugh. Yeah, here's my cousin exactly.

It's very humanizing. She she was on Ellen when I worked on Ellen, and we had to do that thing where we switched sides. There was she had a very special white microphone that she used. There was a it was an entire uh, it was an entire lighting thing that took a couple days. The lighting they had the

Five year old, I remember, and it looked cool.

Thank you.

That's just my two cents. Jimmy, you were there during that right like that. I was there. I said, ladies, let's let's fire up the curling I heard, to make her look nice. Yeah, I remember you.

At the beginning of the show, I said, there's nothing there's nothing wrong with sausage rolls, ladies.

Let's let's make it happens in Chicago, baby.

Everybody loves a sausage cured your baby think.

I always got to kick out of Like when you see a bride somebody on their wedding day and they they choose to wear their hair in curls or something in a way they don't they've never worn their hair like that in their life. And then they're they're they're to their their words, not mine, their biggest day and they choose to wear their hair in a way that, you know, like that pulls them out of their comfort zone and you you don't look like that.

And then they go on, I don't look good in these pictures because you're not you.

You just say it's different because you it's like the no one. Most women never dress like that. So when they go to do it for that one big special day and you're making the craziest decisions with the weirdest Yeah, it's so hard, but you are truly putting yourself into the hands of whoever is going to take care of that for you, because and it can go so wrong

It always so humiliated. You nailed it's and I get it. It's you know, I'm not putting it down.

I'm making a joke as on a community, but I know that's also they want to look like a princess that day.

I understand all of it, but it's still like that the guy's marrying you, you know, not a child. Shirley Temple that's right, thank you, Right.

Jimmy, really quick, can you write this down on your list? You should do an album and the title of the album should be I'm making a joke because I'm a comedian, just like you say about a lot and it makes me laugh.

And on the cover as you with like a five foot wingspan shoulder suit, giant Greg.

That gives away the punchline of the one new joke, Chris, I can't do that. I've written one joke in three years. I can't put it on the cover.

Well, I've been wanting to ask this and I need both your opinions.

Is it racist if I confuse Peter Gabriel and David Byrne all the time.

They're very similar.

I mean they've always been the same person to me. Yeah, I don't know. Tell I'm listening. Yeah, I think it's racist. It is, Karen, I follow through and writing it down.

Yeah, okay, great good. I think you should think about it.

I'm going to think about that and a lot of things. Yeah, that is your get her done.

I think if you just constantly said I make jokes because I'm a comedian.

And I'm joking because i'm a community I'm.

Seeing a rotisserie cassette tape thing and a truck stop riddled with those cassettes. Yeah, Jimmy, when I did your pop Cultured show recently, and it's so funny to hear you say you haven't been doing stand up and you because you were so funny.

Do you remember the episode I was on.

You?

Do you remember it being you were really funny at the top of that. I take your text word for it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you really were firing in a weird way.

I think this having our backs against the wall because we feel like we haven't been doing it so we're not as polished. Put you in the default position of actually defense mechanism being funny the way you learn to be funny in seventh grade.

And that's how funny you were that night, and you.

Were doing that thing where you were you kept without them deserving it, fucking with people in the audience, and it's right when I got mean, this is what it's talking about. Forty minutes ago, you would talk shit about yourself. It was like a perfect balance and you you kept doing it and the audience at Flappers recognized it. So if they can recognize it there, I'm just saying you're ready to go to some of these tiny red dot states.

Well, you're nice to say that. You know. When I was set around with Jerry and we created comedy, I remember, I guess, well, thank you for that. That's very kind of you. Uh yeah, you know, I uh yeah, I guess I try to be funny. I don't know. Yeah, you know, you weren't even good that you do. Okay, I'm a comedian. Guys in a comedian. That's why I make jokes. That's what I do.

Here's the other thing. I would just like to say this, the irony of that Jerry Seinfeld saying that me and Chris thought of that. Actually, no comedians in cars getting comedy.

That's that's our way about.

Well no, Michelle Balloon did. Walking with Michelle, so never mind, I apologize.

I thought so different. Motive trips, Yeah, it's a different thing.

Biking with Jimmy is my new show, by the way, coming out the next month, where I interviewed someone what we both are on huffies going up hills.

How horrible would that be? By the way, just two guys on bicycle. Yeah, I do, uh, I do a swimming one. It's very hard to listen to. Is it hoof you head on? Chris? Uh, well, one of our best guests. Uh, you get it. Oh, I got it. That's the only direction I could have gone.

Right, You had one option and you execute Phelps very nice. Yeah, guys, that was one hour, ten minutes.

We nailed.

It was smooth as so.

Yeah, it was thank you for having me really nice. But you don't agree, Jimmy, No, it was great.

It was wonderful, right yeah, S and s baby, Yeah, I'm in I certainly not say me to give the impression.

Guys, I'm a comedian. I say things to be fun, you know what I mean, That's what I do.

I'm just now you've got me self conscious care because there was a comedian that I used to worked with a lot in Chicago who would do a joke and then he would do the punchline and even go, I'm just kidding.

It's like, no shit, you were a comedian at that point of you being up Thursday. Just kid stop it. I'm just stop announcing it. Yeah, it's just that word.

There's other ways of saying it, and yeah, it's okay to let people know, especially these days.

All Right, Well, I guess That's what I was doing, Chris, is I was just trying to be safe in these twenty twenty threes.

Yeah yeah, safety first, guys, boost up, get your vacs.

Can't be can't be the way the monsters we used to be, right Jimmy five years ago? Ah, you remember me, I do rowdy powdered up, doing all the wrong things, just kidding.

Sure, I did it, good stuff. Look at that you've come alive, Chris, the day the night will kicked in. Oh my god, well I got it. I don't. I've never been sick for two weeks before. But uh I thought I was gonna.

Get away with nobody noticing, and then you noticed it within two minutes.

We Uh, I know we have to go, and by that I mean I got to get here. I can't take any more of this.

But Blossom is insistent that we go. She won't shut up.

I'm gonna just say this, Chris, You've brought a good point. Because of COVID and stuff, we don't know how to just be sick anymore. We assume everything's like we should either be perfectly healthy or we're dying.

We don't know how to go. I think I've had a cold, So yeah, I get it.

I think you're the best ever, and I know Karen does too. We thank you guys, talk about you behind your back in a positive way.

Soda is her dog. I thank you and I love you too both. And let's let Karen walk the dog.

Okay, Yeah, she's absolutely okay, terrific. I love you, Jimmy. Great to see you.

You uh you've been listening to Do you Need a Ride? D U y n. This has been an exactly Right.

Production produced by Analise Nelson, mixed by Edson Choi. Our talent booker is Patrick Kottner.

Theme song by Karen Kilgarrett.

Artwork by Chris Fairbanks. Follow the show on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook at dinar podcast That's d y nar Podcast.

For more information, go to exactly Rightmedia dot com.

Thank you both.

You're welcome.